Total Shuffled Revenge of the Island
by Fangren
Summary: [FOURTH IN THE SHUFFLED SERIES] That island, where it all began. At long last the hit series has found its way back, with thirteen new campers in tow. But the island has been changed, and those campers aren't the ones you expect - they, like those who came before, have been re-ordered in time and space..they have been Shuffled. Season 4 AU; pairing and update info in first chapter.
1. Chapter 1 - Bigger! Badder! Brutal-er!

**Author's Note**

To those of you returning for the fourth season of the 'Total Shuffled' series, welcome back! To those tuning in for the first time, hello! As you may have guessed, _**THIS IS THE DIRECT SEQUEL TO 'TOTAL SHUFFLED WORLD TOUR', AND THUS TO THE SEASONS THAT CAME BEFORE IT. HOWEVER, AS IT INTRODUCES A NEW CAST, READING THE PREVIOUS SEASONS IS ONLY HIGHLY RECOMMENDED RATHER THAN REQUIRED.**_

For those of you who are just starting on this series, here's how it works: Way back before Pahkitew Island aired, I came up with the idea of a fanfic reboot of the Total Drama series where the contestants were reassigned, at _**random**_ , to a new starting series. Twenty-two were assigned to debut in 'Total Shuffled Island'; two more as the newbies in 'Total Shuffled World Tour', thirteen more in this season, and the remaining fourteen in 'Total Shuffled Pahkitew Island' that should come out later this year.

The thirteen characters that make up Shuffled's second generation of characters are...a cast that could only be determined by the random assignment that forms the basis of this series. You'll better understand why when they've all been introduced, but suffice to say I doubt any author among us would have ever intentionally chosen this exact cast for a competition fic under normal circumstances.

As always, I have a lot in store for you all this season.

The pairings I plan to use in this story will have to remain largely secret for now as I don't want to spoil the cast yet. You'll find out what they are as the season progresses.

The update schedule should hopefully be as it was for the last two seasons - expect a new chapter every Friday afternoon (EST). However, as I do expect to get a job soon, the exact time and date may fluctuate a little.

And lastly, a **TVTropes page for this series exists, and as per usual with such things, could always use more work.** Not that I don't appreciate what's already gone into it, of course - I am incredibly grateful to everyone who has worked on it - but with a new season and new characters, there's going to be a lot of things to add in these next few weeks.

But enough of that. I know what you're all eager to see, so without further ado, enjoy the show.

\- Fangren

* * *

 **Episode 1 – Bigger! Badder! Brutal-er!**

The scene faded in to a shot of the Earth from space, an astronaut banging on a small communications satellite in the foreground with a wrench. The satellite had the letters 'TDRI' scrawled on the front in black.

"We've been to the movies," the voice of Chris McLean began as the satellite seemed to whir into function, lights on either end of it glowing green. "We've been around the _world_!" Just as the astronaut gave the camera thumbs-up, the satellite suddenly failed with a jolt of electricity and broke apart, the astronaut palming the visor of their helmet. "And this season," Chris said as the camera rapidly began to zoom in towards northern Canada, "we're going right back where it all began," the camera past through layers of cloud to reach a beautiful morning sky, then panned down to an all-too-familiar island, "at _Camp Wawanakwa_!"

Chris McLean was already standing just off-center on the dock, right by the 'Wawanakwa' sign – both of which looked like they'd gone through some heavy wear and tear. "I'm Chris Mclean," the host formally introduced himself, "and as you can see, things have changed since we've been away." He walked down the dock to where a male red-shirted intern of southeast Asian descent waited with a coconut drink on a platter; the right side of the camp's sign fell down as he passed by, taking out a small piece of the dock.

"And by _changed_ ," the host said with a darkly expectant smile, "I meant gotten really, really, dangerous!" He rubbed his hands together in anticipation, then took the coconut drink from the intern. As soon as he did so a giant pink tentacle rose from the lake with a terrifying roar, and slammed down on the dock – Chris calmly sidestepped it, but the intern and a sizable chunk of the end of the dock were smashed into the water. "Hahaha, good stuff," the host laughed.

"But the rules of the game remain the same," he told the camera, the scene changing to a panning shot of one of the cabin rooms, a cockroach scurrying over the lens. The room itself looked about the same as it had three seasons ago – decrepit and old-fashioned, but boringly so. "A handful of unsuspecting teens will bunk with complete strangers," Chris explained during the pan, the shot cutting to a stained piece of male underwear nailed to a wooden door that promptly opened to reveal the old outhouse confessional within, "air their dirty laundry in our outhouse confessional, and compete in _life-threatening_ challenges all over the island," the camera cut to a long-distance shot of the thousand-foot-high-cliff, zooming in on the gleamingly jagged rocks in the water below it, "and risk being _voted off_ ," Chris continued as the shot cut to the clearing, firepit, oil drum, and eleven stump-seats used for Campfire Ceremonies of the past.

"Last one standing wins," the shot cut from the elimination area to a still image of a wheelbarrow overflowing with money, "one, _million_ , _DOLLARS_!" A short, grand, and victorious tune blared as the shot zoomed in on the prize money.

"Speaking of our cast," Chris said back on the Dock of Shame as a cool rock theme began to play, "here they are now!"

The shot cut to a small but luxurious red-striped yacht where the twenty-four contestants of the past three seasons could be seen more-or-less enjoying themselves. Geoff and Bridgette were making out on the starboard side while Dawn, DJ, and Sammy danced nearby, Amy huffing and looking away from them in disgust. On the stern deck, Beardo beatboxed while Ella sang and danced with Tyler (who had started to regrow the hair he'd lost as a result of the plane exploding last season), Ezekiel and Beth joining in nearby. On a higher sternward balcony, B smiled down at his friends below then gave the camera a thumbs-up, Sierra and Sam played with a smartphone and video game handheld respectively, and Dakota posed for the camera; Shawn dropped down on the group unexpectedly from even higher up, startling all four. And at the bow, Topher and Alejandro leaned coolly against the port-side railing and smiled at the camera, Jo and Lightning arm-wrestled on the railing next to them, Scott leaned out over the starboard rail and spat, Sugar practiced her craptry dancing in front of a rather annoyed and handtruck-bound Scarlett, and Staci sat on the very foremost point of the railing, tail wagging and tongue lolling like the dog she still looked like.

Chris waved at the yacht as it approached...and kept on going, the music scratching to a halt instead of the ship. "NOOOO!" Tyler hollered in surprise in anguish as the boat sailed off-screen, and Chris laughed.

" _No_ , not _them_ ," he told the camera as it zoomed back in on him. "This season, we've got all _new_ players, fighting for the million!" he announced as the music turned tense and grandiose. "And here they come now, for _real_!"

The shot cut to another yacht approaching, similar to the last one but with its stripes a pale teal instead of red. Several teens could be standing along the bow, port-side, upper deck, and stern, and the camera cut to those at the head of the ship – a tall black girl with her dark hair tied back in a short ponytail, wearing an Australian slouch hat, a khaki vest over a white t-shirt, and khaki shorts; and a relatively shorter and definitely scrawnier white boy with thick red hair and the barest minimum of a soul patch, wearing thick glasses, a blue t-shirt with a hamburger on it, a pinkish long-sleeved undershirt, and rather drab pants.

"Meet _Jasmine_ ," Chris said, the girl noticing the boy next to her staring at her strangely.

"Uhh, are you and I gonna have a problem?" The Outback Girl asked sternly in a distinct Australian accent.

" _Harold_ ," the host continued, and the redheaded boy blinked.

"I've never seen a girl as _big_ as you in real life before," The Dweeb told Jasmine in a wheezy, almost gravelly sort of voice, causing the tallest girl to raise an eyebrow in wary disbelief.

The camera panned to the right, moving away from Jasmine but keeping Harold in frame as he looked forward and casually stuck a finger up his nose. Naturally, this grossed out the next two campers in line – another white boy with a tall head and messily cool black hair, wearing a confident smile, an olive green t-shirt with a black handprint on it, a camo-print long-sleeved undershirt, black pants, and a guitar case slung across his back; and a pale-skinned goth girl, her hair dyed black and teal to match her lipstick and the majority of her outfit – black corset, black skirt, black leggings, blue and green sleeves.

" _Gwen_! And, _Trent_!" the host continued.

"Aaaand, I _officially_ can't stand it here," The Loner said, looking away from Harold and slumping down on the railing with her head in her hands.

"Hey, don't be so quick to judge," The Musician told Gwen, turning to her with a calm smile as the shot zoomed in on the two. "I'm sure you'll find something you like here _eventually_ ," he added, looking into her eyes.

"Y-yeah," Gwen mumbled, averting her gaze to hide her blush.

" _Izzy_!" Chris announced next, the white girl in question suddenly and without warning popping up between Trent and Gwen with enough force to knock the two to the sides with startled cries. From the wide grin she was sporting to the bright green eyes to the fiery red hair, everything about her radiated energy; she was wearing what appeared to be a dark green two-piece bathing suit, the top sleeveless and high-necked but with a window in front, and the bottom hidden by a lighter green sarong.

"Oh my gosh, this is so _exciting_ isn't it?" The Wild Child said, speaking rapidly as a hectic tune played in the background. "Like, everything about this is gonna be _wild_ , okay, I can just _tell_ , okay?!" Izzy degenerated into laughter as the camera panned away from her, showing that Gwen had been caught under the arms by an absurdly handsome brown-skinned young man with well-coiffed brown hair, beautiful blue eyes, and a chiseled physique hidden underneath a tight, dark-colored t-shirt and baggy jeans.

"Oh _wow_ ," Gwen mumbled in awe, looking up into the beautiful young man's eyes as a dreamy, rapturous, almost shimmering tune befitting of his looks began to play.

" _Justin_ ," Chris said, emphasizing each syllable of the boy's name.

The Eye Candy looked at the camera and winked handsomely. "It's great to be here," he told it smoothly as he helped Gwen back to her feet.

The camera panned right again, just enough to keep Justin in frame while still showing the next contestant – a black boy with an eager face and an odd manner of dress. He was wearing a green robe with a simple yellow pattern on the front, a blatantly fake beard, and a tall green hat that was rather wizardly despite its visible patch and sag. "I wonder which of my many _spells_ I'll need first," The LARPer wondered aloud in a high, almost raspy lisp.

" _Leonard_ ," Chris finally introduced, "and _Noah_ ," he added, the camera panning further right to show the next contestant – a brown-skinned boy with a big head and a bored look, currently focused squarely on the book he was reading. He wore a red sweater vest over a dark teal polo shirt over a long-sleeved white undershirt, and khaki cargo shorts.

"I don't know," The High IQ said dryly without taking his eyes off his book, "how about something that'll convince us _not_ to vote you off first?" Leonard's face went blank at Noah's 'suggestion', then he rubbed his chin in thought.

" _Courtney_ ," the host continued as the scene cut to a spot further down the yacht, showing a brown-skinned girl with shoulder-length brown hair and a smile on her face. She was dressed smartly, a dark gray top over an off-white polo shirt paired with green capri pants.

"Hi," The Control Freak waved pleasantly at the camera. "I'd just like to say that, as a former counselor-in-training at a _real_ summer camp, I-"

As she spoke the camera panned away to the next contestant, a light-skinned girl with a flower in her bright-red pigtailed hair. She wore a tube top and several bracelets that matched her hair color, and capri pants similar to the girl before her.

" _Zoey_ ," the host introduced.

"Hi!" The Indie Chick waved. "I'm so happy I get to be here, I can't-"

She was interrupted when Courtney walked back into the shot looking rather annoyed. "Ex _cuse_ me," she told the camera bossily, "you can't just pan _away_ before I've finished my introduction!"

"Oh, I'm sorry," Zoey winced, "it's probably my fault. I hope you're not mad!"

"I'm not _mad_ ," Courtney told her angrily, "and even if I _was_ , it would be _completely_ _justified_!"

" _Cody_ ," the host introduced next as a shorter white boy dashed onto the scene, putting himself between the two girls. His longish brown hair was parted down the middle, and he wore a pale yellow polo shirt with single red and blue stripes over a longer gray undershirt.

"Ladies, ladies, don't fight!" The Flirty Geek said in what wasn't quite a suave tone. "We're all friends, right? Just tell me what's wrong, and-"

Courtney cut him off, saying "You stay out of this," as she pushed him away by his face, causing Zoey to cringe.

" _Cameron_ ," Chris introduced next, the camera panning up to a short, skinny black boy standing on the upper balcony. He had short hair and large glasses, and wore a red hoodie and dark yellow shorts.

He took a deep breath and smiled. "Fresh air! A real lake! _Birds_!" The Wide-Eyed Bubble-Boy said, looking around in wondrous amazement until a small flock of pigeons flew past and knocked him over the railing with a scream.

"And _Lindsay_ ," the host finished as Cameron landed next to the thirteenth and final competitor of the season – blonde, blue-eyed, well-endowed, and exceptionally pretty, she wore a blue bandana on her head, a short red tanktop over a longer red tube top, an orange miniskirt, and long, fashionable, high-heeled boots.

She looked down as Cameron landed, and gasped. "Oh my gosh, are you alright?" The Airhead asked, quickly bending down and helping Cameron up. "Because you could _totally_ use some new clothes," she said innocently, looking him over.

"Uhh, thanks?" Cameron told her uncertainly.

"Yup!" Chris said as the shot cut back to him on the Dock of Shame. "It's our _roughest_ , _toughest_ , most _explosive_ season ever!" He took out a remote control, and pressed the large central button with his thumb.

The yacht that the new contestants were sailing in on suddenly exploded, sending all thirteen of them flying and screaming in every direction.

Chris took a casual sip of his coconut drink, then looked at the camera and raised a finger high. "Right here," he said as a faint version of the series' capstone theme played, "on Total! Drama! _Revenge_ of the _Island_!" The shot jumped outward as the title was said, showing Wawanakwa island in its entirety with a few plumes of smoke in the distance marking where the yacht had exploded.

xxx

(Fade to Opening Theme)

[The sequence begins much as it did three seasons ago, with an open into letterbox format as the camera focuses on the tops of a few distant pine trees. A rusty stage light rotates up and turns on; then the shot changes to a cobwebby spotlight swinging down and turning on as well; then a small security camera popping out of one of several leaky toxic waste barrels; then another camera bursting out of a tree hollow, held by an octopus tentacle and dislodging a few bones; then a pair of fair-skinned arms clapping a film slate in front of the camera which switches to a shot of the island, briefly showing a giant octopus looking out of the lake to the right, then flying forward down the dock and past the buildings, passing under a totem pole that Chris was sitting on and which was being carried by a trio of male interns of mismatched heights.]

 _Dear Mom and Dad, I'm doin' fine;_

[The camera rapidly flies through the trees as the lyrics begin, quickly reaching the top of the thousand-foot-high cliff.]

 _You guys are on my mind!_

[It looks down at the ring of buoys in the water below and dives, immediately cutting to an underwater view as the bubbles disperse to reveal Cameron gagging with several vicious-looking fish watching him hungrily.]

 _Ya asked me what I wanted to be,_

 _And now I think the answer is plain to see!_

[Cameron frantically swims up and away from an approaching tentacle, passing another fish wearing a gas mask, and finally grabbing on to the end of an oar. The camera pans up to reveal Courtney as the one rowing the boat; she pulls her oar out of the water and is startled to see Cameron clinging to it, and even more so when the tentacle tries to grab onto him. But with a fierce yet muted scream, Courtney manages to pull the oar away from the tentacle...and in doing so, throw Cameron high into the sky.]

 _I wanna be...famous!_

[The scene lingers on Cameron in front of the sun for a moment, then quick-pans left to Noah reading a book on a stump in the middle of the woods; a falling Cameron abruptly hits him on the back and knocks both boys to the ground. Noah lifts his heads to scowl at the bubble-boy, who just smiles bashfully. The camera pans up and left to Jasmine, sitting on a tree branch and watching the boys below with a smile on her face. Several large eyes suddenly open up in the bark and tree hollow next to her, startling her into falling backward off the branch.]

 _I wanna live close to the sun!_

[At the top of a waterfall, Gwen and Cody float downriver in a canoe. Cody waggles his eyebrows and gives the goth a pair of finger pistols, which only causes her to scowl and look away, and finally spot the waterfall. Both scream as they go over the edge.]

 _Well pack your bags, 'cause I've already won!_

[The camera pans down to Harold, practicing some kind of martial arts tances on a log suspended across the rocks at the bottom of the falls. Though he does not see the canoe falling behind him, he does see Gwen and Cody as they fall right on top of him, breaking the log he was standing on and sending all three into the water.]

 _Everythin' to prove, nothin' in my way;_

[Izzy bounds up next to the outhouse confessional and waves cheerfully, and a monstrous shark with arms and legs bursts out of the outhouse with a toothy grin...until they lock eyes, and the shark runs away in fear as Izzy gives chase with a toothy grin of her own.]

 _I'll get there one day._

[The camera pans to the Mess Lodge, Chef Hatchet's silhouette visible in the window. Zooming in to the room shows him stirring a pot of some greenish slop with a dark grin, and the shot pans over to show Zoey watching nervously, then holding back her vomit as Chef thrusts a spoon full of slop at her face.]

 _'Cause I wanna be...famous!_

[Another pan to the left reveals Lindsay applying her make-up with a powder puff and a compact mirror, then looking back at Zoey – now rather haggard with a bit of either vomit or slop dribbling out of her mouth – and happily using the powder puff on her as well, a cloud of the powder taking of the screen. The powder dissipates as the scene zooms back out of the lodge to the beach, where Trent is calmly strumming his guitar – until a string breaks and hits him in the eye.]

 _(Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

[The camera pans away from Trent and on to Justin, his shirtless back turned but his profile and the reflection in the mirror in his left hand visible to the camera. He turns his head to look at the mirror in his right hand, the reflection winks, and the camera moves on watch an odd, almost rattlesnake-like gull floating on the water. A bulbous-headed fish jumps out over it on the right and a shark jumps out of the left with its mouth wide open, but the first fish blasts the shark with some sort of laser, turning it into a skeleton which is swallowed by the first fish as it finishes its jump. A tentacle rises out of the water to grab the gull, but it quickly lashes out and bites it with its snake-like fangs.]

 _I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

[The camera pans down to the end of the dock to show Leonard, bowing dramatically before taking a few smiling steps back. He reaches into his baggy sleeves and pulls out a wand and a small notebook, raising the former in his right hand while reading the latter in his left.]

 _I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

[A sudden splash of water comes down on the wizard, interrupting his 'casting' and causing him to send a frown upward – Chris is hovering above him in a jetpack and helmet, holding an empty bucket. He drops the bucket then flies off, the flames from his jetpack taking over the screen. It becomes night as they peter out, and the camera pans down across the stars and treetops and full moon to Gwen and Trent with his guitar, sitting at a campfire together. As they lean towards each other with expectant smiles they are interrupted and separated by Chef Hatchet, wearing a hazmat suit and holding a glowing green marshmallow between them with a pair of heavy tongs.

The shot zooms out to show the rest of the cast looking shocked, whistling the last few notes of the song – Cameron, Cody, Justin, Jasmine, Harold, and Lindsay on Gwen's side; Zoey, Noah, Leonard, Izzy, and Courtney on Trent's side; and Chris standing next to Chef on Trent's side as well. The shot continued to zoom out until a signboard was shown marking the presumed entrance to the fire pit; it read 'TOTAL DRAMA REVENGE OF THE ISLAND' in block letters, the third word being the largest and the last word relegated to a board tacked on at the end.]

(Fade to Episode)

xxx

"AAAAHHH!" Cameron screamed, the episode fading in to him landing hard on a rock jutting out of the water. "Is this what pain tastes like?" he groaned. "Ughuh, I mean, aaauggh...," he said, pitifully sliding into the water as Courtney swam past in the background.

"I did _not_ sign up to be treated like this," she growled. "I was a _CIT_ , for crying out loud!"

Cody and Noah were shown swimming side by side clinging to a few pieces of driftwood, then looking to the side at the sound of someone coming up behind them. "Sorry boys, comin' through!" Jasmine shouted as she shot past the two like a torpedo, earning an annoyed look from Noah and a dopey grin from Cody.

The camera followed Jasmine as she swerved around Leonard, who was holding his notebook above the water as he slowly paddled forward. "As glad as I am that I remembered to cast my swimming spell," he said, wincing at the splash of Jasmine's wake, "I wish I'd remembered the _waterproofing_ one too."

The shot cut back to Cameron, now flailing his arms as he struggled not to drown. " _Gosh_ ," Harold said as he swam up to him, "did you, like, not learn how to swim before coming out here? That was a mistake if you ask me."

"Help me!" Cameron spluttered as he finally sank below the water to Harold's shock, but fortunately Trent quickly swam over and dived down.

" _Dude_ , you can't just stand there while someone's drowning," the musician admonished Harold as he surfaced, pulled a coughing Cameron back up with him. Harold hung his head in shame.

The dreamy, rapturous, almost shimmering tune played again as the camera cut to Justin, smiling at the camera as he swam along. He reached another rock jutting out of the water and pulled himself up onto it as though he was a mermaid, and the footage zoomed in and slowed down as he shook the water from his beautiful hair and the sun gleamed off his beautiful smile.

"Oh, _wow_ ," Lindsay said as the shot cut to her and Izzy watching from the water with awe and lust. "He is _suuuch_ a _hunk_ , am I right?"

"He's like a _super_ hunk," Izzy corrected dreamily, before switching to a fierce grin and adding "And _I'm_ gonna make him _mine_!"

"Huh?" Lindsay said in confusion, Izzy's hectic theme replacing Justin' dreamy one as the redhead swam off towards the beautiful young man.

"Wait, hold on!" Justin said in rising panic as he noticed Izzy rushing towards him, giggling creepily. He quickly dived forward off the rock just as Izzy leaped from the water; with her target gone she was forced to roll forward and jump off the rock as well.

The shot cut to Harold and Trent helping Cameron swim to shore, only for a laughing Izzy to slam into the struggling boy from behind, launching him forward with a terrified yell as the boys who had been helping him gasped.

Cameron, in turn, crashed into Courtney, briefly forcing both of them into the water. "Hey, watch where you're going!" Courtney spluttered angrily as she resurfaced, only to gasp when she realized Cameron hadn't come up as well. "Oh wait, hold on!" she said in concern, quickly diving down as the music finally calmed down.

"Stupid _host_...stupid _boat_...stupid _show_...!" Gwen muttered angrily through her teeth as she swam along. "Why did I sign up for this in the first place?"

"C'mon, it's not _that_ bad, is it?" Zoey asked as she swam up beside her. "I mean sure, I don't wanna be swimming right now either, but they did _loads_ of stuff like this in the other seasons!"

"That doesn't mean I have to _like_ any of it," Gwen snapped, causing Zoey to flinch.

"Sorry," the indie girl said.

"Hey, no need to worry, ladies!" Cody said as he swam up to them with a cheesy grin. "I know it can get stupidly tough out here, but I just want you two to know that I'm _always_ willing to help you ladies out. So if you're ever in trouble, the _Codemeister_ will be here to rescue you!" He pointed at himself cockily, and the two girls exchanged an odd look.

"Gee, _thanks_ ," Gwen said dryly while Zoey just looked uncertainly taken aback.

xxx

"Okay, first confessional time, and _boy_ do I have a lot to say," Cody opened with a light laugh in the outhouse confessional. "To make it simple, all the girls here are _gorgeous_!" he gushed. "And better yet, I'm like the third hottest guy _here_! Y'know, aside from _Chris_...a-and _Chef_...and the _interns_..." He shook his head to regain his focus, and continued with "The point is, I actually have a _shot_ at finding a girlfriend in the competition, even _if_ I screw up with some of them."

"I think I'll start with _Gwen_ first," he mused thoughtfully. "Hot loner chicks like her are, uh, kinda my favorite, haha," he grinned bashfully.

xxx

" _Wow_ ," Zoey gushed in the next confessional, "I can't believe I'm _actually_ in the Total Drama confessional. It's so _exciting_! Everyone seems so nice!" Her expression suddenly turned anxious and concerned as she continued. "I hope they all like me. I could use a few new friends," she told the camera, her eyes darting around anxiously. "Or...friends, period. Oh...what if they _hate_ me? Maybe this _flower_ was too big," she said, pointing at the flower in her hair as she became increasingly desperate-sounding. "Am I trying too hard? _You_ like me, right?" she asked the camera just before it cut to static.

xxx

The footage resumed with a close-up of a pair of large black combat boots stepping onto the beach, the camera panning up and zooming out to show that they belonged to a rather wet Jasmine. She looked around, then raised her fist in victory. "Alright, first to shore!" she cheered. "Not like it matters, though, unless that was some kind of secret challenge or something."

She looked around again, and quickly noticed a line of bubbles approaching the beach. The background music spiked dramatically as Izzy leaped from the water with a shout and a laugh, landing in the sand on all fours. "Haha, that was fun!" she said, shaking herself dry like a dog. "We should do it _again_ , but with bigger explosions this time!"

"Uhh, how 'bout _not_ ," Jasmine said warily.

Justin was the next to shore, standing on the back of an apparently smitten shark as his dreamy leitmotif played. "Hi girls," he greeted Jasmine and Izzy, both giving him dopey, lovestruck smiles.

xxx

The incredibly good-looking boy was looking at himself in a mirror as he began his confessional. "I'm a _professional_ male supermodel," he explained, finally looking away from his reflection, "so I _know_ how to use my good looks to get what I want. I doubt anyone here has _ever_ seen someone with _my_ abs...or thighs...or pecs...or cheekbones...or face! My point is, I'm the entire incredibly beautiful package! These girls won't be able to resist me, and I'm gonna use that to my advantage." He finished with a stunning wink.

xxx

/

Courtney and Cameron were the next to make it to dry land, the former CIT dragging the small boy up the beach on his back. "Okay kid, nice and easy," she said in a somewhat slow and calm tone, laying him down and putting an ear to his chest. He immediately coughed up a bit of water, causing Courtney to flinch away from him in mild disgust.

xxx

"I'm what's known as a ' _Bubble-Boy_ '," Cameron explained, rubbing some lotion onto his hands as he began his confessional. "Growing up my mom was reeeeally overprotective, so I've never gone swimming before. Up until six hours ago, I've never done _anything_ before! Except read, and sigh a lot..." He held his arm and sighed.

"But that doesn't mean I'm not a force to be reckoned with!" he declared confidently just as an orange butterfly flew over him and landed on the outhouse wall. "No way! _Danaus plexippus_?" he said in excitement, standing up as the butterfly started moving again. "The monarch butterfly?" It landed on his head...and with a sickening bone-crunch, Cameron started to tilt over. "Gaaah! S-so _heavy_!" he cried in pain, falling over onto the seat under the butterfly's weight.

xxx

The footage cut back to the beach, showing Jasmine, Izzy, Justin, Courtney, and Cameron loitering around a large rock further up the beach and revealing that Harold, Trent, Gwen, Zoey, and Cody had all made it to shore as well. While Harold was busy emptying his sneakers of water on a small rock in the foreground, the other four sat on a few moderately-sized rocks on the right.

"Hey, nice day out, isn't it?" Cody said, looking directly at Gwen as he spoke. "I hope the rest of the competition is like _this_ , right Gwen?"

"Yeah," Gwen said flatly. "That would just be _perfect_ ," she said, standing up and walking away. Cody followed her eagerly, and while both Trent and Zoey watched them leave with concerned looks, only Zoey looked back at the beach when a wave and a dramatic riff signaled that another person had washed up.

It was Noah, who propped himself up on his arms and coughed out a small fish. "Well _that's_ not something I'm ready to experience again," he said scathingly.

xxx

"I'll be the first to admit that the physical stuff isn't exactly my _specialty_ ," he confessed with an almost bored tone. "But I've _seen_ all three seasons of this show. I _know_ you don't need to win challenges to get to the end. All I have to do is be _smart_ about things and not give my teammates a reason to hate me, and I should be good until the merge. And after that," he shrugged then smirked confidently, "well, let's just say I have a few _ideas_."

xxx

" _So_ stoked to be here," Zoey said, Trent still sitting next to her and Noah now on the rock Cody had vacated. "I've been watching Total Drama for _ever_! Who knows, maybe I'll even make some new friends?" she said, looking eagerly between the two boys.

"I'm sure you will, honey," Noah told her in a deadpan and almost mocking tone. "In fact, I bet we'll all be one big happy _family_ by the end of this."

"You really think so?" Zoey asked in confusion before furrowing her brow. "Wait..."

Noah just stared at her. "Yes," he said sarcastically, "that's _exactly_ what'll happen. I mean, it's not like we're in a competition for a million _bucks_ or anything."

"Well, you don't have to be so _harsh_ about it," Zoey huffed before the piercing ring of the camp intercom turning on got their attention.

"Attention, fresh meat!" Chris announced, the shot cut to a pair of loudspeakers on a tree nearby, then panning down and right to show that all thirteen campers - including Leonard and Lindsay – were now waiting around on the rocky beach. "See that trail leading into the forest?" the host continued, the camera following the contestants' gazes right as they looked at where the beach, trees, and rocks met. "Race to the end of the trail," Chris commanded, "and do _not_ disturb the wildlife! That would be _bad_."

"Really?" Jasmine said, looking up skeptically. "I thought all the _really_ dangerous stuff was on another island." She looked to Harold for confirmation, and the nerd nodded his agreement.

"The _tiniest_ sound can set them off," Chris continued. "Liiike... _THIS_!" He blew an airhorn over the intercom, forcing all thirteen campers to cover their ears.

The camera panned over to the distant treetops on the left, the airhorn fading in to a loud, terrifying roar that startled a flock of birds to flight. The music became tense as one tree was knocked over, then another closer to the beach. Finally, the cast screamed and fled into the woods with Cameron jumping onto Jasmine's back as she ran by.

/

A clockwipe transitioned the footage ahead to an adorable little purplish bird singing on a branch...until a frog-like tongue snapped out of a hollow behind it and dragged the bird into darkness.

The camera panned down to a finish line, just as Jasmine ran up to it with Cameron still on her back. "Alright," the tall young woman said happily, "first again! Looks like I'm doing better than expected, although I think I picked something _up_ along the way." She looked back over her shoulder, and Cameron smiled sheepishly at her.

"Sorry," he said, dropping to the ground. "I panicked and hitched a ride so I could get away from the monster. I'm not very good at running," he explained, taking a few steps away from the mildly annoyed girl.

It was then that Chris rode up on a red ATV, his usual smile on his face. "Bubble Boy, two steps left you're on Team A," he directed, Cameron nodding happily and walking a few steps back towards the finish line. "Wonder from Down Under? Move right, you're on Team B," he told Jasmine, directing her to the right with his thumb; she complied with a frown just as Courtney crossed the finish line, skidding to a stop next to Cameron.

"Miss CIT," the host told her, pointing for her to stay where she was, "you're on T-e-a-m _A_." Trent slid in next, and looked around with wide eyes. "Dudley Do-Right, Team B," Chris told him.

"Alright then," Trent said with a calm smile, adjusting the strap of his guitar case and walking off to the right. He paused and looked back as a warbling laugh filled the air, and a familiar hectic tune played as Izzy swung down on a vine, clipped the top of the finish line banner, and landed in the dirt with a painful thud that made Trent, Courtney, and Cameron wince.

" _Thrill Ride_ , Team A," Chris told her.

"Woo!" Izzy cheered, standing up and raising her arms.

Justin arrived next, immediately attracting Izzy and Courtney's attention though his leitmotif didn't play. "Man Candy, Team B," Chris told him, and he walked off with a silent smile to both girls' disappointment.

Zoey and Harold arrived next, the indie girl bending over to catch her breath but the dweeb clutching his chest and falling over dramatically. "Zoey the Friendless, Team _B_ ," Chris said.

"Hey, I'm not _that_ bad," Zoey told him as she walked past, rubbing her arm anxiously. "I swear!"

"Dark and Gruesome, Team A," the host continued over a shot of Harold finally picking himself up, just in time to get startled upright by Gwen's arrival. She gave him a piercing glare as the host added, "Captain Tactful, Team B."

"Got it," Harold said, briefly casting Gwen a nervous glance before running off to the right with an odd, leaned-back posture.

The camera zoomed out a little ways from Team A just as Cody ran up, a grin on his face. "Casanova, Team A," the off-screen host said, causing the boy to give shoot two finger pistols at at Gwen, earning a groan. "Princess Wannabe, Team B," Chris continued as Lindsay arrived next; she squealed and clapped at her assignment, then hurried off to the right.

"Mighty Wizard, Team A," Chris directed as Leonard arrived next, smiling brightly. As he joined his teammates they all looked back towards the finish line, as Noah finally arrived nearly out-of-breath.

"Would you care for some assistance, friend?" Leonard asked, pulling his spellbook out of his sleeve. "I know _many_ rejuvenating spells."

"I'll pass," Noah panted, collapsing on the ground with a groan.

"Aaand Mr. Witty, Team A," Chris finished with a smile, earning another, louder groan from Noah.

"But seriously," Noah said, getting back to his feet and trudging past his teammates, "what even _was_ that thing back there?"

"I'm pretty sure that cry does not belong to _any_ known animal species," Cameron added in a fearful tone.

"Relax, it'll all make sense eventually," Chris explained, his impish smile quickly degenerating into long, evil laughter that caused the two teams – Leonard, Cody, Gwen, Izzy, Courtney, Noah, and Cameron on the left; Jasmine, Trent, Justin, Lindsay, Zoey, and Harold on the right – to stare at him and look at each other in awkward, nervous confusion.

Chris finally stopped laughing, and wiped a tear from his eye. "Now, this season of Total Drama will be a _little_ bit different," he explained. "For example, in every episode, someone _will_ be eliminated."

The campers gasped, and an ominous chant played in the background. "It's _never_ been that hard _before_ ," Zoey remarked in shock.

"I know," Chris told her with a smug grin, "I'm _good_. But since you're all first-timers, I'm gonna cut you a break and hide this bad boy _somewhere_ in the campgrounds." He held up what appeared to be a small wooden carving of his head, and the shot cut in for a close-up. "A genu-ine McLean Brand Chris Head! _Your_ free ticket back into the game!" The small carving was shown against a radiant white and blue background, an angelic chorus playing as images of Chef Hatchet dressed in a lavender leotard and tutu, angel wings, and a halo flew into the corners of the screen while holding harps and singing.

"Even if your teammates vote you _off_ ," he added as Noah and Courtney were shown staring with wide eyes. "Whoever finds it," Chris continued over a shot of Jasmine, Trent, Justin, and Lindsay also watching with wide eyes, "will become the most _powerful_ player in Total Drama history!" Both Leonard and Cody were shown smiling in awe.

The angelic chorus ended as Chris brought the statue in for a closer look, frowning and feeling his own chin. "Is the cleft on my chin really that _big_?" he asked in concern.

"If you wanna get technical about it, it's even _bigger_ ," Harold answered, earning an annoyed glare from the host.

"Moving on," Chris said forcefully, "time for the team names!"

"Ooh ooh! I have one!" Izzy immediately piped up excitedly. "How about Team _Fireball_?" she said, following it up by miming an explosion.

"Nice suggestion, Izzy," Chris told her, " _but_ , names have already been chosen by _moi_. Team A, you shall henceforth be known as, the _Toxic Rats_!" A short but energetic riff played as the screen switch to a green, red, and yellow starburst-patterned background, a green logo spinning up to the front. It bore the image of a six-limbed rat standing up on its hindlegs and bearing it teeth menacingly.

Leonard, Cody, Gwen, Izzy, Courtney, Noah, and Cameron stared blankly for a moment before Izzy giggled and said "Awesome!"

"And Team B," Chris continued, turning his head to the other six, "you are hereby dubbed, the _Mutant Maggots_!" A different energetic theme played as a teal, yellow, and orange sunburst-patterned background took over the screen, and a red logo spun up to the front. This one depicted the head of a three-eyed maggot, its mouth frozen in a gaping hiss.

Jasmine, Trent, Justin, Lindsay, Zoey, and Harold stared blankly for a second as well, then moved their eyes to the nerd on the end as he spoke up. "Gosh, what's with all the chemical waste references?" Harold asked.

The perspective switched to a group shot as another loud roar shook the area. "It's the monster!" Cameron shouted in terror, crouching down with his hands on his head as the other looked around in shock.

The shot cut to some distant trees, a flock of birds flying away as one fell, then the camera panned to the right as another closer tree fell. Justin, Lindsay, and Zoey gasped in fear, the blonde quickly grabbing the model's arm for comfort, and the camera zoomed in on a bush in front of the last fallen tree.

A small hairless squirrel with big yellow eyes jumped out and looked around.

"All that for a little _squirrel_?" Courtney said in disbelief.

"Aww, it's kinda _cute_!" Lindsay gushed...until it blinked sideways, and she cringed audibly.

"Holy crap, what _happened_ to it?" Gwen asked from off-screen as the squirrel happily blinked and looked around some more.

"While we were gone," Chris explained, "I rented the island out to a _nice_ family-oriented biohazardous waste disposal company." As he spoke, the camera cut to a pile of oil barrels stashed in and around a tree. All of the barrels had a hazard sign on them, and most were leaking some sort of foul bubbling green liquid. "Sweet people," the host remarked.

"But," he added as the focus cut back to him on his ATV, "the waste is having a _teensy_ bit of an impact on the flora and fauna." The hairless squirrel was shown again, blinking as a monarch butterfly flew close to it. It snapped out its tongue like a frog, and swallowed the butterfly up.

"Ooh, that's so _cool_!" Izzy said with an excited grin as Noah and Gwen gave her odd looks.

"Hey, yeah," Cody said, cautiously approaching it with a smile on his face. "It _looks_ weird but I'm sure it's perfectly harmless! Right, little guy?" He reached out to pet it, and it roared the same deep and terrifying roar that had scared them all earlier, then shot lightning from its eyes at the ground Cody was standing on. Cody screamed and ran away, and the squirrel blew him a raspberry before hopping back into the bush.

Chris was laughing hysterically as the shot cut to Cody jumping into the arms of an exceptionally annoyed Gwen in fear. Cody smiled sheepishly, and Gwen promptly dropped him on the ground. The camera cut back to Chris as he stopped laughing, then in an elated and dramatic tone said "Most. Danger. _Ev-er~_!" as an equally sharp and dramatic tune played.

xxx

"Okay, if Chris thinks he can get away with ruining the _environment_ out here, he's got another thing coming," Gwen confessed to the outhouse camera in outrage. "I mean, seriously? Toxic _waste_? That _so_ has to be breaking international law or _something_."

xxx

"Now," the host said with a wide smile as the scene cut back to him once again, "before we start our _very first_ challenge of the season, let's give out some rewards. Jasmine," he turned to the right, "because you made it up here before anyone else, your team gets a _trampoline_!" A grand tune played as the shot cut to a close-up of the trampoline, and moments later Chef Hatchet bounced down upon it. "And the Rats, get a _hacksaw_ ," Chris added, the shot cutting upwards to showing his glowering assistant holding the tool in question.

Chef suddenly lost his balance and fell with a crash; Noah laughed at him and had the hacksaw thrown at his head for it; and Harold laughed at him in turn, and in turn got crushed by the trampoline that was thrown at him. " _Gosh_..." he groaned in pain.

"What do these items have to do with this bomb?" Chris asked, holding up a square of plastic explosives with a wireless timed detonator attached to it.

"Uhh, he's not gonna blow us up _again_ , is he?" Trent nervously asked an equally nervous Jasmine.

"Who knows," Chris said with a sly smile, leaning in between the two with the bomb. "Find out when we come back!"

(Fade to Commercial and Back)

The episode resumed on a shot of two totem poles hanging from tree branches. The one on the left was a green-marked rat sitting on a toxic waste barrel; and the one on the right was a red-marked three-eyed maggot with a hazard sign on its base and a hatchet stuck in the bottom.

"Those, are your team totems," Chris explained, the shot panning down to show each team standing below their respective totem with the host roughly between them, the entire group standing in front of a river. "You need to cut 'em down, and get 'em in the river, and ride 'em _back_ to the campgrounds," he explained. "First team there gets _their_ pick of the cabins, and barring some freak _accident_ will win the challenge. But hurry! The totems are rigged with bombs that will explode if you don't plant 'em in front of your cabin in seven minutes or less," the shot zoomed in on the timer on the Rats' totem. "Starting _now_ ," Chris quickly added, and the timer began counting down from 7:00.

"Okay Maggots, let's move!" Jasmine told her teammates.

"Ooh, I wanna try!" Lindsay replied enthusiastically, jumping onto the trampoline that had been set-up under the Maggots' totem. However, rather than go straight up she bounced off to the right with a startled cry and landed with a painful crash just past a nearby shrub.

/

"It's _Izzy_ time!" the redhead announced excitedly as the focus moved to the other team, grabbing the hacksaw in her teeth and jumping onto the trunk of the tree the Rats' totem was hanging from. Courtney and Noah watched her climb in wary silence, then took a shocked step back when she slid back down almost immediately. "Haha, you're a slippery one, ain'tcha!" Izzy laughed, quickly climbing back up.

"Yeah," Courtney said, her surprise quickly fading into annoyance, "this isn't gonna work. We need a _plan_ , people!"

"Let's see, where's that _levitation_ spell?" Leonard said as he flipped through the pages of his spellbook, earning a glare from the former CIT while Cameron rubbed his chin in thought.

/

"Hmm," Harold said, rubbing his own chin as he looked between the trampoline and the totem pole as the focus cut back to the Maggots. "The problem is that not only does the _trampoline_ have to be in the right position under the _totem pole_ , but the _jumper_ also has to hit the right position on the _trampoline_ to bounce at the right angle to grab the hatchet," he explained, the camera following his gestures to the trampoline, the totem pole, the large rock nearby, the trampoline again, and finally the ax.

"So...can you figure out where everything should go?" Zoey said uncertainly, the shot zooming out to show the rest of the Maggots standing around, Lindsay's face looking scuffed.

" _Yes_ ," Harold answered confidently, "but only if I know _exactly_ who'll be jumping. Otherwise, I won't be able to properly take the jumper's weight into account. It's, like, elementary physics."

xxx

"Yeah, I'm pretty smart, and I know about a lot of stuff," Harold bragged to the outhouse camera in what he thought was a cool manner. "I'm pretty much a Jack of All Trades, except that I'm actually like a _master_ in a bunch of areas. The totem poles, for instance," he smiled eagerly. "Did you know that most totem poles are carved out the wood of _Thuja plicata_ , better known as the Pacific redcedar? It's because the wood is, like, really resistant to rot."

He held his grin for a second, then nodded confidently. "So yeah, I'm totally like the biggest asset on my team."

xxx

The footage cut back to another shot of the Rats' totem, Izzy uttering a battlecry as she frantically scrambled back up the trunk, and nearly reached the branch the totem was hanging from. However, just as she paused to catch her breath, she began to slide back down the bark, her eyes wide.

"Well, if _she_ can't climb it," Gwen said, the camera cutting back down to the forest floor where she, Courtney, Cody, and Noah were looking up, "then I doubt any of _us_ are gonna be able to."

"We have to do _something_ ," Courtney countered, "the Maggots are taking the lead!"

"Well it's not like we can just stack ourselves up and reach the rope _that_ way," Noah said.

"Actually," Cameron said in near exhaustion as he dragged a long, flat log in from the left, "I think we _can_ if we can just launch ourselves into the air with the right force and trajectory. It'll be difficult since none of us is large enough to act as a counterweight by ourselves, but it should still be doable."

"Good," Courtney told him, taking the log from him, "let's get to it."

xxx

"Somebody needs to lead this team to victory," Courtney explained in the confessional, "and I'm _clearly_ the best choice for the job. Of course, it's not like anybody _else_ is qualified. Cameron is _smart_ but nothing else, Cody won't stop _flirting_ , Noah and Gwen just stand around and _complain_ all the time, and _Leonard_ thinks he can do _magic_. And don't even get me _started_ on _Izzy_. Meanwhile, _I'm_ a natural leader. The others will fall in line once they realize it, I'm sure, and then _maybe_ I'll be able to guide this pathetic bunch of misfits to a _win_."

xxx

A close-up showed Harold giving the trampoline's position a few minor adjustments, then smiling and standing back up. "Okay, you should be good to go!" he told Jasmine, who was now standing on the large rock that was behind their team.

"Right," Jasmine nodded. A tense challenge tune began as she jumped down onto the trampoline, then straight up to the totem pole. She grabbed onto the hatchet buried in the wooden carving and tried to pull it free, but it didn't budge. "How is this stuck in here so _deep_?" she grunted, swinging her legs up so she could brace them against the bottom of the totem pole.

"Crap," Trent said, the camera panning down to him and the rest of the Maggots looking up. "I don't think this is gonna be enough, guys," he told the others before looking back up at their tallest comrade. "Jasmine, I think maybe one of us should, I don't know, grab on too or something! Maybe the extra weight could-"

"Don't bother!" Jasmine called down to her teammates, pausing to try and pull the hatchet out with another grunt. "I got this, just gimme a second okay?"

xxx

"Okay, so I don't really like taking orders from other people," Jasmine admitted to the outhouse camera, her height forcing her to bend forward to face the camera better. "I'm not proud of it, but I know what I'm doing when it comes right down to it. Another person would've just made it harder for _me_ to climb up and cut the rope."

xxx

"Okay," Cameron said, adjusting the long, flattish log that had been propped up on a moderately sized rock like a seesaw, "Gwen, you're next." He stood up and reached off-screen to the right, pulling the Goth into view and leading her onto the lower end of the log.

"Fine," she sighed in annoyance as Cameron ran off to the left. He met up with Courtney and Izzy who were waiting by the high-end of the seesaw, and jumped onto Izzy's back.

"Okay, again!" he commanded, and the two girls jumped onto the high end, their weight plus Cameron's causing Gwen to catapult into the air with a scream.

She landed with a grunt on Cody's shoulders, and the camera zoomed out to show him leering up at her. "So...fancy meeting you here! Haha...," he grinned.

"Not really," Gwen replied.

The camera zoomed out even more to show Leonard at the bottom of the stack, his eyes closed and his wand at the ready. " _Balanceus_ , _superius_!" he intoned dramatically, earning odd looks from the two on his shoulders. "That was a balancing spell," he explained.

"Right...," Gwen said, rolling her eyes. A sudden scream caught all three's attention, the camera panned back up just as Noah landed on Gwen's shoulders.

"This had _better_ be worth it," he grumbled.

"You're telling me," Gwen added.

/

The challenge music resumed as the shot cut back to Jasmine hanging from the hatchet, still trying to pull it out. "Almost...got it!" she said, finally freeing the ax then grabbing a short branch below the totem as she started to fall back down.

"Woohoo! Yeah!" Lindsay cheered down below, Trent and Harold and Zoey all joining in.

"Watch out!" Justin said suddenly, pointing up at the branch Jasmine was hanging by one arm from as a hairless squirrel emerged from a hole in the trunk with an annoyed chitter. "It's one of those weird _rat_ things!"

The squirrel seemed to take offense to that, and its eyes began to glow red. It suddenly shot eye-lasers down at the male model, who jumped away with a yelp of "Not the face!" The squirrel did not let up, however, and kept sweeping its laser-gaze across the panicking Maggots below.

/

"Izzy, you're next!" Cameron told the wild child, Courtney standing at his side by the high end of the seesaw.

"Alright! Time to load up the _Izzy_!" she said, enthusiastically jumping and flipping into place.

"Ready?" Courtney asked the bubble-boy.

"I think so," Cameron replied, and the two jumped onto the high end and launched their teammate into the air. She flew towards the tree with a wild laugh that only stopped when she slammed into the trunk, and bounced off it onto Noah's shoulders.

"You okay up there?" Courtney called up with a hint of anxiety in her voice.

Noah looked up at the giggling redhead, then back down at his unseen teammates. "She's fine!" he told them. "We just need one more person and we should be good!"

"That's me then," Cameron gulped, grabbing the hacksaw and running back towards the far end of the seesaw-catapult.

"Wow, I think we might actually pull this off!" Gwen commented with a smile as the shot cut back to the stack.

"Well yeah," Leonard told her, "I _did_ cast that balancing spell on us after all."

"Yes, I'm sure _that's_ the secret to our success," Noah replied sarcastically.

"I know, right?" Izzy told him. "We're like _unstoppable_ with a wizard on our team!"

Noah looked up at her, then groaned in exasperation.

/

The hairless squirrel was still attempting to zap the five grounded Maggots, forcing them to run about in terror.

"Alright," Jasmine frowned as the shot cut back to her hanging from the branch the squirrel was on, "that's about enough of _that_. C'mere, you little rascal!" She slammed the hatchet into the trunk, startling the mutant squirrel just long enough for her to grab it in her empty hand. Its eyes immediately turned red again as it prepared to fire its laser, but Jasmine just pointed it up at the higher branch the totem was hanging from – the blast snapped through it, sending the Maggots' totem pole crashing to the ground.

"Alright!" Trent cheered with the other members of the team as Jasmine landed next to it, on her feet and no longer holding the squirrel.

"Celebrate later," Jasmine told them, quickly pushing the massive carved log over onto its side, "we gotta _move_!"

/

"Okay, I can _do_ this," Cameron breathed heavily as he waited on the lower end of the Rats' makeshift catapult.

"You better!" Noah called down to him.

"Yeah," Izzy added with what almost sounded like panic, "we only have like three _minutes_ left!"

The bubble-boy gulped. "It's now or never, Cameron," Courtney told him, preparing to jump. "Now get up there and _saw_!" With a mighty leap she launched the small, screaming boy into the air, and the dramatic music peaked as he sailed through the air. A close-up showed him screaming, then the perspective inverted to show the tree he was about to hit...until a pair of arms shot up and grabbed him out of the air.

"Quick!" Izzy barked at him, the shot zooming out to show her holding him up. "Cut the rope!"

"R-right," Cameron gulped nervously, turning around and sawing through the rope holding up their totem. A few seconds later, the totem landed on the ground earning a cheer from the seven Rats.

xxx

"Okay, so for a second there I _totally_ wasn't sure Cameron would be able to do it," Izzy admitted with an almost laughing tone, "I mean, he's like _half_ my _size_ , okay. That's _tiny_! But then he _did_ do it and it was awesome!" She laughed a little before continuing. "But seriously, how awesome is my team? I'm totally getting, like, really good _vibes_ from them, uh-huh, and I usually have a pretty good sixth sense about these things." As she spoke she put her fingers on her eyelids and stretched them out, presumably to emphasize her point.

xxx

The challenge music resumed over a shot of the rocky river, whoops and shouts of excitement coming from upstream. The camera panned up just as the Mutant Maggots floated by on their totem – Jasmine in front, followed by Trent, Harold, Zoey, Justin, and Lindsay in back. The Toxic Rats floated by soon after, Izzy at the head followed by Courtney, Cameron, Gwen, Cody, Noah, and Leonard on the end.

"They're gaining on us!" Harold shouted in alarm after looking back.

"I think we have bigger problems," Zoey said, pointing forward, " _look_!"

The perspective briefly switched to reveal that the river they were on was heading over a cliff, and the Maggots gasped. "Alright team, no big deal" Jasmine said, "it's just a little waterfall!"

"Just a little _big_ waterfall!" Justin corrected in rising panic.

The shot zoomed out to show the top of the waterfall, the six screaming teenagers shooting over it on their totem pole and falling into the forest below. Unseen branches snapped as they plummeted, but the camera cut to the ground just in time to show them landing on the shore of the waterfall's basin on the broadside of the totem pole, and after a bounce that jostled Lindsay from her seat they began to slide down a hill.

"WAAAAAAH!" Lindsay screamed, hanging on to the back of the fast-moving pole with only her hands.

"Hold on Lindsay, I got you!" Justin told her, quickly turning around and grabbing her arms. "Don't worry!" He easily pulled her back onto the totem, and gazed deep into her eyes. She instantly stopped screaming. "Haha, you had me worried there for a second," he told her. "Maybe you should just hold on to _me_ from now on just in case."

"Heeheehee, sure!" Lindsay giggled, quickly wrapping her arms around the male model's waist and leaning in to his back. Justin looked at the camera, and flashed a wink and gleaming smile.

Back at the top of the waterfall, the Toxic Rats shot out into the air with screams of their own. As with their rivals, the sound of crashing branches preceded the thud of their landing, and they whooped and cheered as the camera cut to them sliding down the hill.

"Lean forward!" Izzy commanded in a surprisingly vicious tone that took her teammates off-guard.

"Wha-" Courtney spluttered in the beginnings of outrage before she felt Cameron leaning forward behind her as well.

"She's right, _lean_!" he said, and the other five promptly did so. The camera zoomed in on Cody in particular, who was giggling with his face right next to the bare skin of Gwen's lower back. The shot zoomed back out to show the Maggots passing the Rats, and a glowering goth reaching behind with her left hand and whacking Cody on the side of his head.

"Now they're in _front_ of us!" Harold shouted in alarm again.

"Then _lean_!" Jasmine commanded, and the six leaned forward as well.

/

The music stopped abruptly as the scene moved to Chris and Chef, lounging in short white deck chairs outside of the cabins – the one on the right looked just as it had in season one, but the one on the left had been replaced by what looked like a larger and much fancier two-and-a-half-story house.

"Ahh, feels good to be back," Chris said, leaning back in his chair while Chef read a book.

"Too true, man," the hulking man added as he turned a page.

The sound of panting prompted the camera to pan to the right, and none other than Tyler ran up. "Dude, hey, Chris," he said, "the boat wouldn't _stop_ for some reason!"

"Oh look, it's former player _Tyler_ ," Chris told the camera, "who's _not_ competing this year!"

Tyler nodded eagerly and waved at the camera, then said "So I swam back over _here_ to-" He paused, blinked, then widened his eyes in realization. "Dude, _what_?! I'm not _competing_?!"

"I'm afraid you and the other 'classic players' have outlived your usefulness," the host explained. He briefly looked at the camera, then added "Chef?"

"On it," the hulking man said, stepping forward and planting a bomb similar to the ones on the totem poles on Tyler's chest.

"Oh no," Tyler said in growing horror as the light on the bomb began to blink, "not again!" He turned and fled, but the host smiled impishly and eyed the button on his remote.

The scene cut to a long-distance view of the thousand-foot-high cliff as Tyler's screams were followed by an explosion that launched him into the air, visible even from afar.

Chris and Chef were laughing hysterically as the shot cut back to them, but they stopped as soon as they heard the laughs and cheers of a team approaching from the forest. The camera cut to the foot of a hill on the edge of the woods as the totem bearing the Toxic Rats slid down, and came to a stop just before the host and cook as a victorious tune played.

"Yes! I _knew_ we could beat those guys!" Courtney cheered, raising an arm in celebration.

"Tick tock," Chris told them, tapping on his watch. The bomb's timer was shown counting down from 0:15 to 0:14, and the camera panned back up to a nervous Courtney and Gwen.

"Quick, grab the good cabin!" Courtney commanded, and the shot cut to the two cabins – a flat stump occupying the area between them – as the seven teens carried their massive totem over their heads, grunting with the effort.

They managed to place it upright on the stump, and the timer stopped at 0:05 seconds. As it flashed and beeped the Rats cheered for their victory...that is, until the sound of approaching screams caught their attention.

The music turned tense again as the Maggots finally arrived at the bottom of the hill, hitting a small bump in just the right way to send their totem flying into the air. All six fell off it, and to the mute shock of Chris and Chef it crashed into the second story of the better cabin. The timer on it counted down from 0:03, to 0:02, to 0:01.

The explosion that followed blew the entire two-and-a-half-story building apart, leaving behind nothing but smoke and splintered boards.

"Too bad," Chris told the Toxic Rats as the camera panned right to the seven shocked teens standing around their totem pole, "it had an eight-person hot tub and _air conditioning_! Looks like you lost it _and_ the challenge." They all groaned in disappointment.

"This is _ridiculous_!" Courtney turned and raged at the host. "This has _got_ to be against the rules!"

Chris gave her a look of amusement and shrugged. "Hey, I said the first team here would win unless a freak _accident_ occurred," he told her, "and I'm pretty sure one just _did_. So as the only team with a cabin still standing, the Mutant Maggots _win_ the first challenge!" He pointed to the other team, still recovering from their sudden fall. They cheered and celebrated, though in a strained and hurting manner.

"So where exactly am _I_ supposed to sleep?" Courtney asked the host.

"No worries," Chris told her with a dismissive hand wave as the sound of a helicopter rose up nearby. "We've got a back-up cabin for you. It's every bit as nice as the one you lost." As he spoke, the show's red helicopter was shown bringing in the cabin in question and lowering it into the scattered rubble of the old one...revealing that the new one was basically identical to the older model the Maggots had gotten stuck with.

The Rats groaned again as it landed on the ground and one of its doors fell off its hinges.

"Team Rat," Chris told them as the camera panned back to the right, "I'll see you at the campfire for the _first_ elimination ceremony of the season." He laughed, then high-fived Chef.

The seven losers grudgingly made their way to their new abode, and the camera focused in on Gwen near the back of the group as she was tailed yet again by Cody. "Hey, don't worry, Gwen!" he told her as he caught up to her. "It's just one loss! I'm sure we'll still have all _season_ to get to know one another."

" _Great_ ," she deadpanned, and the geeky boy shot her a pair of finger pistols before dashing ahead. She sat down on the steps of the cabin, and sighed in aggravation with her head held in her hands.

She looked up just as Leonard arrived, the smiling boy giving her a wide wave and a lisping "Salutations!"

"What do _you_ want?" Gwen asked in annoyance.

"I couldn't help but notice the _imp_ that has been pestering you," he said, sitting down next to her. The camera zoomed in as he leaned in to whisper "Might I propose an _alliance_ between alchemy and alabaster so that we might vanquish him?"

"Uhh...," Gwen said, recoiling in wary skepticism.

"Ooh!" came the sudden and energetic voice of Izzy as she leaned down between them, the shot zooming out as both let out startled gasps to show her hanging upside-down by the edge of the cabin roof. "Sounds fun! Can I join?"

Gwen stared at her, then buried her head in her arms and knees and groaned again.

/

The footage skipped ahead with a dramatic beat, a full moon now shining over Camp Wawanakwa.

"The votes are cast," Chris said as the camera panned down to the campfire pit, the seven members of the Toxic Rats sitting among the eleven stump seats – Cameron and Courtney in the front row on the far right; and Noah, Izzy, Leonard, Gwen, and Cody taking up the entire back – and Chris in position at the oil drum podium. "Those who receive a _regular_ marshmallow can stay. But _this_ season," the shot cut in closer to the host as the faintest beginnings of the series' deep and tense elimination music played, "one player will receive a very _special_ marshmallow. A marshmallow you do _not_ wanna eat." He motioned to the side as Chef walked up, wearing a hazmat suit and carrying a thick metal box marked with a hazard symbol.

Chef flipped open the lid of the box, revealing a single marshmallow with a bright but sickly green glow to it. "Whoever gets the Marshmallow of _Toxic Loserdom_ ," the host explained, "is out of the contest. Which means, you can't come back! Ev-er." He paused for a brief moment, then smiled and picked up the first normal marshmallow from the tray resting in front of him.

"The following players are _safe_ ," he announced. "Gwen," he tossed the first bit of white to the goth, who caught it quickly and without flinching from her stern yet annoyed expression.

"Cameron." The second was thrown to the bubble-boy, who caught it in his hand only for them to immediately strain under the weight.

"Noah." The lazy brainiac got his next, though he failed to catch it and scowled in pain and annoyance as it bounced off his left eye.

"Courtney." The former CIT caught her prize with a cocky smirk and a haughty, self-assured humph.

"And _Izzy_." The wild child caught hers in her open mouth and happily began to chew it.

"And the Marshmallow of Toxic Loserdom goes to," Chris announced as the music began to rise. The camera cut to the back-right corner as Leonard and Cody stiffened up, and Gwen looked from one to the other with her marshmallow still in her hand. As the tension in the music continued to build, close-ups of each boy were shown – first Cody, then Leonard – as they began to tremble and sweat. The Marshmallow of Toxic Loserdom was shown glowing in a pair of tongs held by Chef, and finally the camera cut back to Chris as the music peaked and he said...

" _Cody_."

"C'mon, _seriously_?" The Flirty Geek said, standing up in shock. "I'm out _already_?" The glowing marshmallow was tossed at him, but he backed away with a quick yelp; a few dark notes played as the toxic sweet burned a hole into the stump he'd been sitting on. He hung his head and sighed. "Well, I guess it's the Dock of Shame for me, then, right?"

"Actually," Chris told told him, "we came up with something _new_ this season! You'll _looove_ it."

/

The screen rotated around itself, the scene cutting to the torch-lit dock where, of all things, a large catapult had been set up. Cody was sitting warily in its bowl, while Chris, Chef, and his former teammates watched nearby.

A short but grandiose fanfare played. "Say hello to the ' _Hurl_ of _Shame_ '!" Chris introduced excitedly, the series' sombre farewell tune beginning in the background. "Patent pending."

"Well Gwen," Cody nervously told the goth girl currently glaring at him as Chris walked past him to the catapult's lever, "I guess we'll have to get to know each other some other time, heheh."

"Yeah, no thanks," Gwen replied tersely.

"Aww, really?" Cody said, disappointment covering his face just before it was replaced by terror as he was catapulted into the air. "Love hurrrrrrrrtttsss!" he called as he hurled off into the distance over the lake.

"One down, twelve to go," Chris told the camera with a grin, the series' capstone theme starting up. "Who's next in line? Find out next time, right here," he pointed downward, "on Total! Drama! _Rrrevenge_ of the _Island_!"

The camera jumped outward with each part of the title as usual, ending with a long-distance shot of Wawanakwa with the moon's broken reflection shimmering on the surface of the lake.

(Fade to Credits)

* * *

 **Author's Note - Post Script**

And now for a pun I've been itching to make since before season one. Ahem.

'Revenge of the Island'? More like 'Revenge of the _Nerds_ ', am I right?

But seriously, just as the first generation cast was overloaded with villains, so is the second generation cast overloaded with nerds. Cameron, Cody, Harold, Leonard, _and_ Noah? That's nearly half the cast! But despite it being so imbalanced in that respect, I think it's gonna work. There's a lot of potential humor in this group of misfits, as I hope you've already discovered.

Also of note is the fact that only two are from the season's canon cast - Cameron and Zoey. Although they were, of course, on the same team and good friends in canon, I decided to split them up so they could develop individually, and so the Rats could have a sort of canon 'anchor' character.

So...let's talk about that first elimination, shall we? It begins with me starting to think up the teams for this season back in season one. I ended up sorting them out according to what I thought would be good subplots and interactions, and while they did end up kind of imbalanced on the physical side, I figured that would still work. There was only one person left over, who I had decided would be the seventh member of the losing team, and thus the first boot.

That person was Leonard. Yes, like so many people back then I was ready to write him off as natural first-boot material, even more so considering this cast. But...then the Ridonculous Race came out, and Leonard was set to be in it. I began hoping that he'd actually get developed a little beyond his wizard persona, but alas this was not the case. And as some of you who frequent the TD Writer's Forum may remember, at around that time I decided that I would give my own version of Leonard a better wrap.

Thus, I needed a new first boot. By then I had already decided that Leonard would be on the Toxic Rats, as that seemed like the most humorous idea. I didn't want to change the teams around, so I decided to boot one of the other Rat boys instead. And between Noah, Cameron, and Cody, Cody was clearly the most expendable. I'm honestly not really a fan of him to begin with, and since his role in the story was basically going to be that of his canon season one nuisance self anyway, I figured it would be easy to justify his elimination. His constant flirting with Gwen annoys her enough to join forces with Leonard and Izzy, and with the other four not unified in their votes the group of three was able to get the first nerd out of the cast.

I am aware that, for whatever reason, Cody is pretty popular in the fandom, and I expect some anger at him being the first boot, but I'm fine with that. There's plenty of other fanfics where Cody is the star; today is his turn to be voted out first, and Leonard's turn to survive. After all, having done such good jobs with Ezekiel, Beardo, and even Staci, I can't exactly abandon Leonard when he's the next most underused.

Anyway, that's all I have to say for now. This is the first thirteen-episode season so I expect thing to go a bit faster pacing wise, but who really knows.

Actually, wait, I just remembered (and came back to edit this after already uploading)! Since the cast of Total Shuffled Pahkitew Island can now be determined solely by process of elimination, I figured I'd just reveal it outright: Anne Maria, Brick, Dave, Duncan, Eva, Heather, Katie, Leshawna, Max, Mike, Owen, Rodney, Sadie, and Sky will be the cast for the Shuffled series' sixth and probably final season.

I look forward to reading all your reviews and opinions and thoughts, so until next week!

\- Fangren

* * *

 **Appendix: TSROTI Eliminated Contestants**

Cody - (13th Place)


	2. Chapter 2 - Truth or Laser Shark

**Author's Note**

Greetings once again, dear readers! I can tell you're all excited about this series - seriously, 47 reviews is a heck of a lot, well above my expectations for the premiere. As honored as I am to have such a large and dedicated fanbase, it will take a lot of space to answer everything as I always do, so please bear with me.

 **Elizabeth Fire Ice Heart:** A big Gwent fan, eh? Good to know. The idea of having them on separate teams from the start is something I thought would be an interesting twist, and I'm looking forward to how it all plays out.

 **DSX62415:** Thanks! I hope you get your keyboard troubles resolved soon.

 **Glowing Insanity:** Haha, yeah. Although getting half the cast right on a blind prediction is about what you would expect, since there were only 27 campers left to choose from they're pretty much evenly divided between the two possible generations.

 **VIPGuest:** Yeah, I think this cast has a lot of humor potential as well. I won't comment on your proposed love triangle, but I do hope I'll be able to change your opinion of Leonard at least a little bit. As for the chapter length...well, I expect they'll be about the same overall since the only length to be saved is from a lack of musical numbers. Oh, and the pun is a reference to an old (and terrible) movie series called 'Revenge of the Nerds'.

 **PizzaTheBomb:** Glad to hear it! And a pretty good assessment of the cast, too; there's a lot of quirk and different personalities that'll be fun to play off one another. And for people like Gwen and Trent who you're not too keen on, well hopefully I'll be able to make them a bit interesting with the Shuffled season.

 **Gage the Hedgehog:** Thanks! I hope you continue to enjoy the season.

 **atom king:** Thanks, and yeah I'm gonna do my best to develop as many people as I can. As for Izzy's back story...well, you'll just have to wait and see what I have planned for her this season.

 **StarHeart Specials:** Hah, I'm glad you like so much of the cast's potential, even if it means that some pairs are never gonna form. No Shuffled AleHeather is regrettable, but I can live with it, whereas Mike and Zoey...well, I'm not that big a fan. Though I disliked the canon Sky/Dave storyline even more, to be honest. Anyway, I hope you enjoy what happens next!

 **Tokusatsu-31st Century:** Glad to hear it, and cool name change.

 **The Prime Writer:** Ah, fair enough. I look forward to hearing your assessment of the first two episodes of the new season. I'm glad you enjoyed the last few chapters of World Tour, with Ella's character development and eventual win. And as for her and Tyler as a couple, part of what I wanted to show with them was that even if you've been crushing on someone for awhile, it's still okay to not only want to take things slowly, but even to try and move on from it. A single teenage crush isn't the be-all and end-all of your love life, even if it does seem like you could be a good pairing. So did Ella and Tyler ever officially hook up, and what became of them if they did? I'm admittedly not entirely sure. But I do know that they're still friends, at least.

 **moka evans:** Thanks! And yeah, I will say that there necessarily has to be three villainous (or villain-like) characters from this season if only for All-Stars to work properly. Who those are will be revealed in due time, though - same with Noah and Leonard's relationship.

 **Sarcasm is a Habit:** Wow, someone who's actually okay with Leonard being in the cast! Hah, but anyway, I'm really glad this cast is going over as well as i expected it to, it's a really great mix. The nice cabin getting destroyed again was...honestly just me not wanting to describe the inside of it right now, and because things exploding are always nice. And as for your story, I'll look into it when I have the time, probably tomorrow. Another reviewer suggested it too, actually, so yeah, I'll check it out.

 **Animation Adventures:** Yup, like I said it's really not a cast any of us would willingly hand select. And as for TSPI's imbalance...all I can think of is that most of them really have no business getting stranded in the woods with no food or shelter provided for them. It's gonna be tough to figure things out without a strong Shawn or Jasmine analog, but I have some ideas about what to do. And yeah, a bunch of couples are broken up...I'm most disappointed about the lack of Noah/Owen and AleHeather, but I can make do without them.  
I'm glad you're enjoying things so far. Figuring out how everyone would react with this season as their first has been...interesting. Most are basically just the same as in their canon debut seasons, but since basically everyone here has already been watching the series and came in knowing roughly what to expect from the game, it's allowed a few to be a bit more active than they were in their debut seasons - Noah and Justin especially.  
But yeah, this cast is gonna be interesting. There's a lot to look forward to, I think.

 **bruno14:** Glad to hear you're already excited for Pahkitew Island! There's a lot of ideas I have for that season that I'm looking forward to writing. And yeah, you managed to predict six members of this cast right, which is to be expected - there was about a 50% for any of the possible contestants to be in this generation, so it's only natural that most cast predictions would be about 50% right. As for Gwent...well, I wouldn't give up on them so easily. That said, I hope you enjoy the rest of the season.

 **Lulu'sBackInTown:** Haha, well, I'm glad I'm not like most authors in that regard. I take pride in the fact that I've done a pretty good job developing most of the underused characters that got Shuffled into the first generation cast, so it's only natural that I'd keep it up and give Leonard a go.

 **acosta perez jose ramiro:** Thanks! Good to hear so many people are understanding about why I decided to make Cody the first boot this season.

 **Ddynamo:** Oh ho ho, quite the interesting predictions you've got there. Not much I can really say about if, of course - you got some thing right, some things wrong, and overall it was an enjoyable read. I look forward to seeing how, if at all, it changes in the coming weeks.

 **StayOuttaMyShed:** Let's see, where to start...well, I'm glad you're loving the cast, even if you're not too excited about Gwen, Trent, Courtney, and Cameron. Jasmine and Harold though? Hell yeah, I'm glad you love them too. There's a reason why I introduced them first, and Jasmine definitely seems like Harold's type. Though how they progress during their time together is a secret that I'm keeping tight. How far each of your prospective villains goes will be revealed in due time, as will their exact roles in the story, and the same can be said of Lindsay, Zoey, and Leonard. And you're right about Cody - without some development already behind him and someone like Sierra to bounce off of, there's not much to him that's really needed in this cast.  
As for the Pahkitew Island cast...well, I have even less to say about them right now. You'll just have to wait another six months or so to find out how they get handled.

 **I. M. Poik:** Yeah, I'm definitely gonna be changing the win-loss balance between the Rats and the Maggots this season. But without someone like Scott around to purposely sabotage them, it's only natural that the Rats are gonna win more than they did in canon. And interesting predictions, of course, even if I can't say much about them - aside from what I already told Animation Adventures that some characters will be more active than in there canon debut seasons, simply because they've seen the first three Shuffled seasons and have a better idea of what to expect and do. And also that I hope my plan for Leonard's development actually works where others have apparently failed.

 **P. T. Piranha:** Glad to hear it! And yeah, between the cast and the lack of a Scott-like villain this season's plot is gonna go in interesting directions. The cameos this season will, I think, serve a bit more of a purpose than in canon, or at least have more of an effect on things if only slightly. And yeah, World Tour is gonna be a tough act to follow - but with this cast, and what I have planned, I think this season's gonna be great.

 **Nickie Mudkip:** Had you not gone and decided to **_plagiarize my work_** , I'd have more to say to you right now. But I'm still pretty mad, so don't expect so much as an acknowledgement that you reviewed next time.

 **SomePanLovingGuy:** Fair enough. I do hope you enjoy the rest of the season a little bit more, though.

 **Guest #1:** Ehh, Jasmine x Izzy isn't really on my radar right now. Not saying that it couldn't work and be enjoyable, but I've got other things in mind for them. Sorry.

 **Guest #2:** If I see a good opportunity to have a guy hook up with another guy I will, fan favorite status be damned.

 **Guest #3:** You being completely anon makes it hard to be sure, but I think I know what you predicted. As for whether or not Shasmine will happen in this universe, and the fate of Justin and Courtney...well, I'm afraid you'll just have to wait and see.

 **Aztec 13:** Hmm...well, interesting suggestions, but I'm afraid you'll just have to wait and see how Noah develops this season. Same thing for Gwen and Cameron...

 **ashDanLand:** Hey, no problem! Those things happen, it's okay. And I agree that the canon Revenge of the Island had a lot of good humor but some problems, and I hope that my version will be able to outdo the canon in some respects. I hope you enjoy it!

 **FOWLKON:** Haha, yeah, I figured you'd be the most mad at me for eliminating Cody first. When you named him as one of your favorites in your last WT review, I winced a little knowing what was gonna come. Sorry to disappoint you, but I just felt that he was the best choice for a first boot. That aside, I'm glad you seem to be interested in how the others are gonna play out. You make a great point about Courtney - she's a perfectionist to the very core, and that's what's always driven her interactions and conflicts with the others in canon. I've got a lot of interesting ideas in store for her...  
And yeah, you're right about Noah, Justin, and Courtney's races. I really should've said them outright in their intros, and maybe I'll go back and edit them at some point, but it is what it is and I'm glad you reminded me of them.

 **Solarr-Eclipse:** Wow, I'm glad I brought such happiness to you! I hope I can keep it up this season. And yeah, it's safe to say that this cast is gonna develop quite differently than in canon, at least overall. I hope you enjoy what is to come!

 **Super Guest:** Thanks! And...yeah, didn't even realize it at the time but I guess it would've been tough for Trent to keep his guitar after the explosion. But we know other people managed to get some of their stuff in canon, so it's not that big a deal I think. The guitar's a big part of Trent's image, so it's not like I could just let him lose it.

 **Star Saber21:** Honestly, it's probably for the better that Duncan's not around - it would just make things with Gwen and Courtney more annoyingly like canon. And yeah, I suppose Cody did manage to avoid some more physical pain with his early elimination.

 **FilipinaPossible:** Haha, I don't think anyone was expecting this cast. I know I sure wasn't when I randomly generated it way back when. But, I think it's a good mix, and I hope you enjoy what happens with them.

 **Knifez:** Haha, I knew you'd like this cast. Noah/Gwen...while i could see it working, I'm not sure if it's right for this story. Partly because of Gwent, and partly because if I do ever get around to doing RR, it is possible that I put Noah in it and in that case I'd like to give myself a chance to write Nemma better than canon. But then again, who knows. This cast has a hell of a lot of potential, and there's a lot of ways to go - especially with 7 of them moving on to All-Stars eventually. Oh and about that 52-person season you suggested? Well, that's honestly a bit too many characters for me to handle. If I do ever continue the Shuffledverse beyond simply doing RR, I'd probably do either an underdogs season with all pre-merge boots, or a Survivor-style Fans vs Favorites with half returning non-winners and half new people. But that's way in the future - I still need to get my financial situation sorted out first.

 **The Misguided Angel of Death:** Thanks! I'm glad that yet another person isn't too sad to see Cody go. And yeah, no Duncan or Mike this season really opens up some doors with Gwen, Courtney, and Zoey - I'm looking forward to figuring out how the girls will develop on their own, so to speak.

 **ferguson97:** Yeah, the first Shuffled generation really did have pretty much all the 'S' names except for Sadie and Sky. With how common a letter it is to start of first names, you'd think the characters with it would be better distributed...but hey, this is part of what makes Shuffled what it is. I hope you enjoy the rest of the season!

 **Call Me Ishmael:** Yup, haha, it's one of those casts where it's hard to figure out what to expect from them. But I think that's gonna make this a great season. Interesting predictions as always.

 **Guest #4:** lol good. It was plagiarizing a lot of my own work, so it deserved to get taken down.

 **mitchn:** Thanks, its gonna be quite the ride getting these nerds through the season. Unfortunately, I'll have to turn down your request - it just doesn't fit what I have in mind for either Leonard or Izzy. As for former finalists appearing in TSAS...there's a very high probability that at least some of them will compete.

 **Moonlights Glow:** Hell, and welcome! It's always nice to hear from long-time readers, first-time reviewers, and I hope to hear more from you throughout the season. I'm glad you enjoy the series so much, and what I've been able to do with some of the more neglected characters. Hopefully I'll be able to change a few peoples opinions of Leonard this season, and that even if I fail that you and everyone else will still enjoy the story.

 **OMAC001:** Yup, nothing like a decision like that to shake things up a bit. I hope you enjoy this week's episode!

 **Explorer of the Unknown:** Hey, no problem! You review when you're able to, I completely understand. And yeah, this cast has a lot of potential - I'm absolutely glad I decided to put Gwen and Trent on opposite teams, for one, since it'll change how they (and those around them) react to any attraction between them; there's a lot of ideas I have for them. And Zoey, of course, gets the chance to develop in the absence of her canon love interest - another opportunity I' happy to have. Regarding possible cameos in the next two seasons...honestly, I don't think I'm gonna do them. Both, I think, work better if they keep the focus on their own casts, while the cameos in this season can at least potentially set things up for All-Stars. Oh, and if I did cameos in Pahkitew Island people would be clamoring for Alejandro and Heather to meet and be shipped, but since he'd be 19 and she only 16 at that point in this universe, I'm not really comfortable doing that.

 **lordkalel:** Thanks, though I hope I'll be able to change your opinion of Leonard this season. As for Mike...well, I've given his character and role in TSPI a lot of thought. He and his disorder were handled incredibly poorly in canon, so there's a lot of work I have to do to write him in a way that will satisfy me. I do have plans in the works but, well, it's still about half a year before I start work on that season so nothing's really set in stone yet.

 **wifishark:** Thanks! And yeah, a lot of people were surprised I booted Cody instead of Leonard, which I expected and is why I'm glad I decided to do it. And as for what will become of Dakota's canon subplot...well, you may have a decent idea by the end of the episode.

 **Guest #5:** Oh, uh, thanks, I guess? Like, I'm against the TPP, but I don't honestly think it's gonna affect this site very much.

 **Joel Connell:** Thanks, I'm glad you're looking forward to the rest of the season. I'm not 100% sure what I'm gonna do with Brick and Eva in TSPI right now; maybe they'll compete, maybe not. As for Sky and Dave, I will say that I'm not really a fan of them as a couple, especially as far as canon is concerned; and I do have more of a concrete idea of what I'll be doing with them when it comes to it. And I'll see about checking out that story you suggested when I have the time.

 **link9753:** Awesome, great to hear it! And yeah, it seems Justin, Courtney, and Noah are on a lot of people's lists for this season's villains. Regarding the villains of TSPI, I've already talked a bit about my views of Mike (and therefore Mal) in earlier reviews, particularly lordkalel's, but I will say that the main villain role will almost certainly fall to Heather - it's the role she's most suited for in a debut season, after all. But regardless of what happens on the antagonist front, I hope you enjoy the series.

/

Well, those took forever to get through. But hey, public responses are what I do. Next up is a reminder of the teams:

Toxic Rats: Cameron, Courtney, Gwen, Izzy, Leonard, Noah

Mutant Maggots: Harold, Jasmine, Justin, Lindsay, Trent, Zoey

Next up, a TVTropes page for this series exists, and as per usual with such things, could always use more work. I thoroughly appreciate those who've already been working on it, and look forward to seeing what you all add next.

That's enough Author's Note for now, so let's get on with the show.

\- Fangren

* * *

 **Episode 2 – Truth or Laser Shark**

"Last time, on Total Drama Revenge of the Island!" Chris opened over a long-distance shot of Wawanakwa, the recap montage beginning soon after. "Thirteen new competitors were _blown away_ by this year's challenges," the host said as the yacht carrying the new cast was shown, Chris maliciously pressed a button on his remote control, and the yacht blew up. "They were treated to an early-morning swim," Cameron was shown trying not to drown as Harold swam up to him, "said hello to the island's wildlife," Cody was shown reaching out towards a hairless squirrel only to get nearly zapped by its eye-lasers, "and did some _totem-surfing,_ " the Mutant Maggots slid down the hill and into the air, falling from their totem just before it crashed into the better cabin and exploded. "Ex- _plosive!_ "

"In the end," a few short clips of Cody hitting on Gwen to the goth's annoyance were shown in quick succession, culminating in her being approached by Leonard and Izzy, "Cody's flirtatious ways got on enough people's nerves that they sent him packing, _Hurl_ of _Shame-_ style." The recap footage ended with Cody getting catapulted off the island after getting turned down by Gwen.

"Who'll go home next?" Chris asked the camera from the end of the dock. "And how much pain can I put them through first? Find out right now, on Total! Drama! _Revenge_ of the _Island_!"

xxx

(Fade to Opening Theme)

 _Dear Mom and Dad, I'm doin' fine;_

 _You guys are on my mind!_

 _Ya asked me what I wanted to be,_

 _And now I think the answer is plain to see!_

 _I wanna be...famous!_

 _I wanna live close to the sun!_

 _Well pack your bags, 'cause I've already won!_

 _Everythin' to prove, nothin' in my way;_

 _I'll get there one day._

 _'Cause I wanna be...famous!_

 _(Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

 _I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

 _I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

(Fade to Episode)

xxx

The episode opened on a shot of the morning sky and a few far-away bird calls, a couple sharp notes playing as the camera panned down to the two cabins of Camp Wawanakwa.

The birdsong was joined by several obviously – and badly – imitated calls, and the shot cut inside to the girls' half of the Rats' cabins where a fully-clothed Izzy was leaning out the back window, whistling and tweeting. Gwen was shown in a lower bunk along the right wall, turning over in her bed with a groan and forcing her pillow over her ears, and the camera panned left to show Courtney looking down from a higher bunk on the opposite side of the room. Her hair was tied back in a short ponytail, a pink sleep mask rested on her forehead, and she was glaring at her roommate in annoyance.

"Izzy, what are you _doing_?" she asked in exasperation.

"I'm communicating with the _birds_!" the wild child answered, pulling herself back into the cabin and grinning. "They always have such interesting things to say at this time of day."

"Yeah, sure," Courtney said dryly. "But could you talk to them some _other_ time, maybe when the rest of us _aren't_ trying to get some sleep?"

"Aww, but I don't wanna miss out on all the hot gossip!" Izzy pouted.

"What _gossip_?" Gwen asked, sitting up in irritation so she could glower at the redhead. "They're _birds_! You can't even understand them!"

"Hmmph," Izzy sniffed, "maybe _you_ can't."

She was promptly hit on either side of the head by her roommates' pillows.

/

The shot cut abruptly to a top-down view of the other half of the Rats' cabin, showing Leonard meditating calmly on a top bunk on the left and what were presumably Cameron's eyes peering out of the depths of a cocoon-like red sleeping bag on a lower bunk on the right. The camera cut in close as he looked around cautiously, until the sound of a door suddenly slamming open and shut startled him enough to poke his head out.

It was Noah – flat against the front door with his eyes wide, his breath heaving, and his clothes dirty. "Wow, what happened to you?" Cameron asked in concern.

Noah quickly became calm enough to smirk. "I was just, uh, out for a morning _jog_ ," he explained. The footage quickly cut to a scene of him running in terror from a Woolly Beaver – one with several boney spikes jutting out of its back. The shot flashed back to the Rats' cabin, and Noah added "After doing so _poorly_ yesterday I figured I could try to get in better shape."

"Huh," Cameron considered, "I guess that makes sense."

"Yup," Noah said quickly, brushing the dirt from his clothes as he walked forward. "So, what's with the sleeping bag burrito?" he asked, looking at Cameron's cocoon-like set-up.

"This?" the smaller boy said, pulling himself out of the bag a few more inches. "Oh, well, I was having trouble sleeping last night until I tried recreating my bubble."

"Glad you got that figured out," Noah told him with forced cheerfulness.

xxx

"So yeah," Noah admitted to the outhouse camera in a dry tone, "what I was _actually_ doing this morning was trying to find that 'McLean Brand _Chris-Head_ '," he rolled his eyes as he made air quotes. "I figure if I can find it without anybody else suspecting that I have it, I'll have a bit more _leeway_ in terms of strategy."

xxx

The camera cut back outside the cabins, zooming on on the Maggots' abode on the right then cutting inside to show Lindsay dutifully applying her lip gloss with the aide of a hand mirror.

Zoey walked up behind her from the left, stretching her arms and yawning. "Good morning," she greeted.

"Good morning Chloe!" Lindsay answered in a chipper tune. "Hey, do you have a straightening iron I can borrow? Chris took mine for some reason."

"It's... _Zoey_ ," the indie girl corrected in a slow, bewildered fashion, "and no, I don't. Though if I _did_ , Chris probably would've confiscated it like everything _else_ that's even remotely electronic."

"Aww," Lindsay pouted. "I guess I'll have to do without. It'll be _tough_ , though," she added, looking uncertainly at her reflection again and lifting up a loose strand of hair.

/

The scene flashed to the boys' side of the cabin, the camera focusing in on Justin as he slept, bare-chested on a lower bunk on the right wall with cucumber slices over his eyes. A dreamy harp tune played as the camera zoomed in closer and closer, until a quick but soft guitar riff pierced the otherwise silent room. Justin stirred, removing his cucumber slices and blearily asking "What's that _music_?"

"Sorry, man," Trent said as the camera zoomed out and panned over to show Trent, full-dressed, sitting on his lower bunk on the opposite wall and holding his guitar. "Just needed to get the chord out, y'know? Didn't mean to wake you up."

xxx

"What can I say, ever since I got out here I've been feeling inspired," Trent confessed to the outhouse camera. "I know it's only been a day, but I really think I'm gonna enjoy my time here at camp. Y'know," he laughed, "aside from all the toxic waste and killer _challenges_."

xxx

/

A serene song played as the scene moved back outside the cabins once more, then up to the top of a tall pine tree where Jasmine was sleeping on a thick branch, a rope tying her leg to it. She woke with a sudden yawn and stretched her arms, then untied herself.

xxx

"I'm not really... _used_ to sleeping in beds like the ones in the cabin," she explained to the outhouse camera. "They're a little _small_ for me, y'know? Most things are, it comes with being so tall. It's a good thing I enjoy sleeping outside," she added with a smile. "And besides," her smile faded into a frown, "it's better this way. The other girls are probably intimidated by me enough as it is _without_ me sleeping in the same room as them."

xxx

The footage cut back to Jasmine as she started climbing down her tree, and the camera quick-panned down to the base where Harold was bent over inspecting the bark with a magnifying glass. He scratched a little bit with his fingernail, then stood upright. "Interesting, very interesting," he said to himself, putting the magnifying glass in his back pocket and taking out a notebook that he promptly jotted something down in.

It was then that Jasmine landed on her feet behind him, shaking the ground and earning a startled yelp from Harold as he fumbled with his notebook.

"Oh, sorry about that," Jasmine told him as she turned around, "I didn't expect anybody to be around this early. What brings you out here, anyway?"

Harold picked up his notebook, adjusted his glasses, and smiled smugly. "I wanted to examine the lifeforms around camp to see what effects their exposure to toxic waste has had on their physiology. I figure anything we know about the mutants will come in handy out here. Plus," he grinned, "they're just plain _cool_."

"Good call, mate," Jasmine smiled. "So, you got any experience as an outdoorsman then?"

"Of course," Harold said, closing his eyes and puffing his chest up proudly. "I've been in the Scouts since I was seven, and have earned _several_ badges in a wide variety of subjects."

Jasmine snorted out a laugh. "Good to know," she told her smiling teammate.

xxx

"I can tell she's impressed," Harold confessed proudly. "I mean, who wouldn't be? It's not every day you meet somebody with skills as mad as mine. I bet it won't be long before she's all over me," he smirked confidently.

xxx

The scene cut to a seagull sleeping in a nest inside the horn of a loudspeaker. A blowhorn sounded through it without warning, though, forcing the bird out into the air and revealing its snake-like features as it fell.

"Up and at 'em my little _morning glories_!" Chris called out, sitting on his ATV below. "It's time for today's challenge!" he announced, the camera moving behind him to show the two teams assembled in front, their respective logos appearing on the screen overhead.

"What?" Courtney asked in shock. "But...but we haven't even had _breakfast_ yet!"

"I can conjure up some magical _berries_ for you if you want," Leonard offered.

"No thanks," Courtney in a level yet annoyed tone.

"And _I_ haven't had enough beauty sleep yet," Justin added, pointing to his face and adding "These looks take _work_ y'know!"

"And what a work they _are_ ," Lindsay gushed, staring at him dreamily.

"You can catch up on your sleep _after_ the challenge," Chris told him before pointing off to the left and smiling. "Rrright this way, to the _Bay_ of _Dismay_!"

The twelve campers groaned.

"Hey, you know what this reminds me off?" Izzy spoke up excitedly. "This one time when I went kayaking down the _Amazon_ , uh-huh, and got captured by a lost tribe! They had me tied up for, like, three _days_ without food before I escaped. It was kinda _fun_ now that I think about it."

"Suurrree," Noah said slowly as he, Gwen, and Courtney exchanged a look of disbelief.

/

The scene flashed ahead to the twelve campers walking along at an even pace. "'Bay of Dismay'?" Zoey told Harold as they walked side-by-side. " _Yikes_! Sounds like one of those fight locations in Total Warriors 2."

"Totally," Harold nodded. "Maybe Chris is gonna have us duel over a pool of ravenous man-eating sharks like in the movie."

"I hope not," Zoey laughed.

The camera lingered a few seconds as they walked off, long enough for Trent and Gwen to enter the shot together. "So, what kind of heinous challenge do you think Chris is gonna put us through this time?" Trent asked.

"Couldn't tell ya," Gwen answered with a small smile. "Even _I'm_ not twisted enough to predict _him_. But," she paused as Izzy ran by screaming excitedly and unintelligibly, "I bet _some_ of us are gonna take it better than _others_."

"Yeah," Trent said, still a little stunned, "she sure seems like a handful."

"You have _no_ idea," Gwen told him. Once again the camera lingered in place as the two walked off to the right, replaced as the focus as Cameron and Courtney walked up from behind them.

"I hope this isn't another physical challenge," Cameron said. "I'd prefer something a little more... _academic_."

"Hrmm," Courtney said, scowling forward, "that _would_ probably be easier for us to win. But it won't _matter_ if we aren't acting as a _team_."

"Uhh, I _suppose_ ," Cameron replied, "but I'm not sure what you're getting at exactly."

"I'm talking about how all of a sudden _Gwen_ is talking to _Trent_ ," Courtney explained, still looking forward with an annoyed scowl. "I thought she was gonna stay _focused_ , especially after she decided to get _Cody_ voted out, only now she's _fraternizing_ with the other _team_."

"Uhh...is she?" Cameron said, looking forward in confusion; the shot cut outward to show Gwen and Trent still chatting amicably as they walked along. "Huh," the bubble-boy said blankly as the shot cut back in to him and Courtney.

" _Yeah_ ," the former CIT said, eyes narrowed in annoyance.

The shot cut ahead to the front of the group, where Leonard and Lindsay were walking side-by-side. "So while my robe may not be _fashionable_ ," the wizard explained, "it's cloaking powers _more_ than make up for it. Observe!" He dramatically put his arm over his mouth, then dramatically intoned " _Disappearicus, convincicus!_ "

He went silent for a second, then added "Can't see me anymore, can ya?"

Lindsay's eyes went wide. "Oh my gosh, I totally _can't_!" she said breathlessly, looking around in shock.

xxx

"Hey, something finally _worked_!" Leonard confessed excitedly.

xxx

The static cut away to the body of water that was, presumably, the Bay of Dismay. Three structures rose out of its waters: on the left and right were two-tiered game-show-like seats that housed the Toxic Rats and Mutant Maggots respectively and bore their logos on the front; and in the middle was a single Greek pedestal upon which Chris stood in his blue tuxedo below a large video screen and electronic scoreboard.

"Welcome to the 'Getting to Know You' Trivia Game Challenge," Chris introduced after a short fanfare. "Everyone strapped in all nice and snug?" he asked the contestants.

"Oh, we're _snug_ alright," Courtney answered irritably, squirming in her harness in the center-front seat of her team's stand. "I can barely _move_ in this thing!"

"Yeah, that's what you get with children's size harnesses," Chris chuckled. "I'll be asking our players _embarrassing_ personal questions," he explained, "and I mean _majorly humiliating_. If the player I'm talking about hits the poorly-wired buzzer and _owns_ their humiliation before the time runs out," he continued as the shot cut back to Courtney looking at the red buzzer on the counter in front of her, the camera zooming out to show Noah on the left, Cameron on the right, and Izzy, Leonard, and Gwen on the back row, "their team gets a point." The camera panned across the Maggots, showing Jasmine, Zoey, and Harold in the top row and Trent, Justin, and Lindsay below. "First team to five wins part _one_ , and a _distinct_ advantage in part two."

"Buuut," Chris added as the shot cut back to him as the tension rose in the background music, "if _no one_ owns up, _this_ happens!" He took out his remote, pressed the button, and with a mechanical whir the elevated stand the Maggots were seated in suddenly dropped into the bay. The music became tense as the shot cut to the six holding their breaths below the water, focusing in on Trent in particular. He looked around and screamed when he saw the large mutant shark with arms and legs looking at him hungrily, and his teammates joined in as the shark reared back to take a bite – but the stand rose back up just in time to take the teens away from danger.

The shot cut back to the surface as the Maggots re-emerged, dripping and coughing and generally frantic. "Dude, there's some kind of, I don't know, two-legged _shark monster_ down there!" Trent told the host in a panic.

"Ya mean _Fang_?" Chris asked with a broad smile and quick laugh. "Yeah, it turns out toxic waste can mess with stuff _underwater_ too." He pointed up at the screen above him as he spoke, and the camera panned up to show a seemingly ordinary shark drinking a cup of tea on a wooden post underwater...until the music peaked, the screen flashed, and a picture of Fang against a simple teal background replaced the normal shark. "Who knew?"

"Wow, that's so _cool_!" Izzy said excitedly from the Rats' stand.

"Anywho," Chris continued slowly, "when a team gets dunked, their opponents can _steal_ by guessing which dunk-ee is guilty. Guess right, and you get a point. Guess wrong, and _this_ happens." With a sly look he pressed the button on his remote again, and this time it was the Rats who got plunged into the bay. Fang was shown tying a bib around his neck, then looking behind him just as the fresh set of teenagers came into view. He turned around and opened his mouth to bite, and with the muffled screams and tense music playing the shot cut back to the bubbling surface. Chris put his hand to his ear then pressed the button once more, and the Toxic Rats rocketed back up on their stand.

"Now that we understand the rules," Chris told them as they coughed up water, "let's start the game!" A short gameshow jingle played, and the host pulled a notecard out from behind his back. "To the Rats, now listen carefully," he began, "who wore one of _these_ ," he motioned upward to a picture of a diaper that was now displayed on the screen above him, "until they were _eleven_?"

All six members of the Mutant Maggots began to laugh, as did five members of the Toxic Rats – all except Cameron, who blushed and seemed to shrink in his seat as the camera zoomed in on him. "My mom didn't want to risk me falling into a dirty toilet," the bubble-boy tried to explain in his embarrassment, pressing his buzzer and yelping at the shock he received. Courtney to the left and Gwen above him stopped laughing when they noticed what had happened.

Another jingle played as the shot cut to the scoreboard, the Rats' half changing from 0 to 1.

"Next question," Chris said as the camera moved back to him and his card, now turned towards the Maggots. "Which one of you has the middle name _Doris_?"

"Hey, that's not _embarrassing_ ," Courtney spoke up in outrage. "Sure, Doris is old- _fashioned_ , but it's only a _middle_ name!"

"Really?" Chris smiled. "I wonder how the _Maggots_ feel?" He turned his gaze back to the other team, and the camera panned across each of its three girls – Jasmine more concerned with the constricting straps of her harness than the question; Zoey looking around blankly; and Lindsay playing with a lightly braided lock of her hair. As the timer continued ticking the shot finally panned up to Harold, who was sweating and blushing nervously. He finally shuddered, then slammed his right hand down on his buzzer. "I admit it," he declared after getting shocked, "my full name is Harold Norbert Cheever _Doris_ McGrady V."

A bit of light laughter came from the Rats, Courtney included, and the scoreboard updated to show the Maggots' first point. "And it's one-all!" the host declared, earning a cheer from the other five Maggots.

"Aww, thanks Harold," Zoey whispered to the drooping nerd, "I know that must've been a little tough." Harold just nodded solemnly.

"Rats," a sharp jingle played as Chris turned back to the other team, "which one you once reserved a room at the-"

He was cut off by the sound of the buzzer being pressed, and the camera cut over to Izzy grinning as she was electrocuted.

"Wow, eager much?" Noah asked her.

"Hey, no reason to draw things out, right?" Izzy giggled.

"Uh, actually," Chris corrected, "if you'd let me _finish_ , I was gonna ask who once reserved a room at the _wrong hotel_ and didn't find out until they got to where they were _supposed_ to be staying. Which, for the record, was _not you_."

Four of the other Rats groaned, with only Leonard looking around anxiously. "Izzy, why didn't you wait until he finished the _question_?" Courtney asked in irritation.

"Hahaha, sorry," Izzy laughed, "I _totally_ thought he said the Reserves and not reserved. See, I spent a summer training with them," she explained, "and got into a bit of trouble when I, like, blew up the kitchen by _accident_ , haha. That's why the RCMP is still all over my _butt_ ," she laughed as her teammates exchanged looks of wary disbelief. "I'm so totally _AWOL_!"

"Rrriiigghhtt...," Chris said slowly. "Anywho, time for your penalty." He smiled darkly as he pushed the button on his remote again.

The Rats were plunged back into the water, and the camera focused on Izzy as she felt a tap on her shoulder. She looked to the side as the shot pulled back, revealing Fang just as he chomped down on the energetic young woman, the stand rising back up as Fang struggled to close his jaws.

The shot cut back to the surface as the other Rats warily looked at the water, and gasped as Fang and Izzy suddenly breached – the redhead giving a battle cry as she gave the mutant shark a powerful uppercut in what was probably his chin. Izzy landed on the counter in front of a gaping Noah, and wiped her arm across her face as Fang splashed back into the bay.

xxx

"Oh man," Izzy laughed, "he was _so_ lucky he caught me by surprise." She stopped suddenly, felt behind her back, winced as she pulled something out, then held up a large shark's tooth. "Ooh, neat!" she said excitedly.

xxx

The next to use the confessional was none other than Fang, examining his mouth in a hand mirror with great concern. Upon noticing the gap in his upper row of sharp teeth, he growled angrily and snapped the mirror.

xxx

"Well that was fun," Izzy said offhandedly as she jumped back into her seat. "What's next?"

"Hopefully _not_ another close-encounter with an angry shark-monster," Noah said.

"Well, since nobody on Team Rat actually answered the question correctly," Chris explained, turning to the other stand, "the _Maggots_ get a chance to steal."

"Thanks a _lot_ , Izzy," Courtney hissed to her teammates.

The focus cut back to the Maggots as they turned towards each other. "So, any ideas?" Zoey asked.

"What was the question again?" Lindsay asked in confusion.

"I think it was which Rat booked a room at the wrong hotel," Trent said.

"Oh," Lindsay said blankly. "Well, do we even _have_ to answer? I don't wanna get dunked again if we get it wrong."

"Hey, good point," Justin chimed in, the shot zooming back out as he and the other Maggots looked towards the host. "Hey, Chris? Can I leave? Between the tight straps and the mutant shark, I'm _seriously_ risking my modeling contracts."

"Uhh...," Chris began in annoyance before getting interrupted.

"Whoa, if _he_ gets to get out of this, I want out too," Gwen said, standing up and trying to undo her harness. "I am _not_ gonna have my secrets aired on international television _and_ risk a shark attack."

"Excuse me," Cameron piped up, raising a finger and looking at the host, "but may I be excused as well? I've already been humiliated so I don't see any point in staying."

"Okay, everyone just _settle down_ ," Chris told them all sternly.

"That's actually a good point," Harold said as he too began to undo his straps. "Unless we can get more than one question about us there's no reason for _me_ to be here either."

"You could still help us figure out the questions, right?" Trent suggested, which gave the nerd pause.

"Well _I_ don't wanna do this _either_ ," Lindsay said, crossing her arms defiantly.

"Hey! Host talking here!" Chris barked. " _I_ decide when the challenge is over."

"Then get on with it so we can win already!" Courtney told him. "The Maggots _clearly_ don't wanna steal the point," she added, motioning over to her opponents while her eyes stayed on the host.

"Whoa there," Jasmine countered, "don't get ahead of yourself, I still wanna take a crack at that."

"You're not serious, are you?" Justin asked, his eyes wide. "Think of the _beauty_ you're risking!" Just then, Fang jumped out of the water and took a large bite out of the Maggots' stand, forcing Trent – who was closest – to yelp and recoil, and Justin to scream and recoil even further.

"Yeah, I'm thinking it might be time to _bail_ ," Noah remarked, earning a gasp of shock and betrayal from Courtney.

The shot cut back to the Maggots as Jasmine began to argue with Justin and Lindsay and even Trent, Zoey looked on in silent anxiety, and Harold just tried to undo his straps again. Eventually, the shot cut back to a stewing host as he finally clenched his fists and shouted "Alright! SHUT IT!"

The off-screen arguments promptly ceased. "Thanks to that pathetic digression," he said in annoyance, glancing at his watch, "now we don't have enough time to finish this challenge! _Happy_?"

All the Rats aside from Courtney and Izzy voiced their agreement, the CIT scoffing in disdain while the wild child let out a disappointed "Aww..."

Likewise, all the Maggots agreed happily save Jasmine, who crossed her arms and huffed "I still think we could've won..."

"Well ya won't be happy for long," Chris told them and the camera, smiling as a hollow sound played. "Come back after the break for an _all-new_ challenge from which there is _no escape_. And in the meantime," he added slyly as he took his remote back out and pushed the button, causing both teams to be dunked into the bay with a scream once more.

(Fade to Commercial and Back)

The scene faded back in to a shot of some treetops, Zoey saying "Well, even though we didn't win I'm glad _I_ didn't get asked any questions," as the camera panned down to the Maggots walking through the woods. "It was bad enough watching Harold and Cameron go through it."

"You can't let that stuff get to you," Jasmine told her, the two girls walking at the front of their team's pack. "Sure it's humiliating, but it'll pass in time. Besides, it's not like any of us would've held your secrets against you, not when _our_ secrets probably would've been revealed too."

"Huh, I hadn't thought of that," Zoey said with a contemplative look.

"It's the same thing with that shark," Jasmine added. "You can't let your fear control you. One good punch on the nose and it would've scrammed."

"Really?" Zoey asked in confusion.

"Yeah," Jasmine nodded, "I saw it on TV once."

"Yeah, well _I_ saw it up close and personal," Trent interjected. "And if it comes back, I'm not putting my hands anywhere _near_ it."

xxx

"Jasmine _does_ have a good point," Zoey considered in the outhouse confessional, a finger on her chin as she looked down in thought. "But then again, so do Fang's teeth."

xxx

The scene cut back to the Rats, also walking through the woods together, and focused on Courtney and Gwen at the middle of their pack.

"Nice _teamwork_ out there," Courtney told the goth in a snippy tone. "You practically cost us the challenge!"

"Not really?" Gwen replied irritably. "I mean, we probably weren't gonna win anyway if Izzy jumped the gun again. And honestly? Getting an advantage in the next challenge was _not_ worth it."

"Not to _you_ , maybe," Courtney told her. "You're just lucky we're still on even ground with the other team, because you're _seriously_ risking elimination if we lose."

Gwen stopped in her tracks, and so did Courtney. " _Really_ ," the goth said with an unimpressed look. " _I'm_ the one who'd be going home after I helped get us out of the challenge that _nobody_ wanted to do."

"W-well," Courtney blustered uncertainly.

"Yeah," Gwen said as she walked onward, "that's what I thought."

The shot cut ahead to Leonard and Cameron, who looked like they'd been listening and were now watching as Gwen walked by with an annoyed expression. When she passed, Leonard shook his head and tutted. "I sense troubled times ahead for our team," he said.

"Yes," Cameron said, still looking in the direction Gwen had gone, "I think that's probably obvious. I'm not sure what we can do about it though."

"I guess I'll have to cast a divination spell," Leonard said, reaching in to his sleeves, "so that I might better learn what the future holds." Cameron just raised his eyebrow at him.

xxx

"According to all known laws of physics," Cameron explained, putting on hand lotion as he began his confessional, "magic can _not_ exist. So naturally, I'm _veeerry_ suspicious of Leonard's claim of being a wizard. I think I'll try to observe him more carefully from now on."

xxx

"Welcome, players!" Chris announced over the loudspeaker again, the camera cutting down to ground level to show the Rats meeting up with the Maggots again. "Now that you're all here, it's time for part two of today's challenge," the host continued, the shot zooming out to show all twelve campers standing in some sort of wide field of mud with a a wooden ramp leading up off-camera on the right.

"The 'Mad Skills Obstacle Course'," Chris announced in person as a dramatic riff played, the shot cutting to him standing on some patch of grass.

"Boo ya," Harold said, grinning as he pumped his fist. "This challenge has me written all over it. 'Mad Skills' is basically my middle name."

"Really?" Lindsay asked in confusion. "I thought it was something else."

"Yeah," Justin chimed in, "Norbert, Cheever, and _Doris_ , right?"

Harold frowned irritably at them. "I was being metaphorical, _gosh_!"

"As I was _saying_ ," Chris continued with irritation of his own, "the relay race begins with a mad dash from the Kick Start," the shot cut to the wooden platform at the other end of the ramp, where an absurdly large rubber root was connected by wooden shaft and gear to a pole sticking up out of the platform. "Forget coffee," the host said as the boot swung squeakily back and forth in demonstration, "if this baby doesn't get you goin', nothin' will."

"Then it's off to the race against time that is the Cannonball Run," Chris said, the camera following his motion further onward to another stretch of wooden platform. Several cannons situated below suddenly blew gaping holes in it, and the shot zoomed out to show several more cannons hooked up to a scaffold over the platform and aimed downward.

"Over to my personal fave," the shot moved to the end of the platform where a log had been set up to rotate n its side, "Wrecking Ball Alley! Hurts _so good_ ," he said as the camera panned across and the titular wrecking ball swung down over the rolling log.

"And moving on," the shot cut next to a few higher, disconnected, and generally precarious platforms, "we head to the Gang Plank, complete with rabid mutant beavers." The shot cut to the mud pit at the bottom where two giant woolly beavers with boney spikes along their back were busily chewing through the poles the gang plank platforms were on.

"Followed by," the shot cut to a close-up of a large, red, butt-shaped apparatus that was moving up and down, "the bouncy agony of Double Trouble." The shot zoomed out to show four of the butt-shaped things moving up and down between two platforms.

"And finally," Chris said, "the _Grand Slam_ ," the shot cut to several giant baseball bats sticking up out of the mud surrounding an equally giant baseball mitt, "where you'll use ropes to swing into the giant baseball mitt, while avoiding those deadly bats." The shot zoomed in on the mitt, then panned over to one of the bats as a small red bird flew head-first into it, knocking it out with a clonk. "Piece of cake," Chris said with a chuckle as the shot cut back to the staring and nervous campers.

"Oh, and as you may remember," the host added, "I said that the _winning team_ from part one would have a distinct advantage in part two?"

"But there _was_ no winner!" Zoey said.

"Yeah, don't remind me," Chris answered in annoyance. "The _losing_ team was gonna wear snazzy specs while competing," he explained with a chipper smile, "but since we never actually _finished_ the competition," he became annoyed again, "I've decided that _everybody_ has to wear them!" He laughed, and the campers looked behind them to see Chef Hatchet holding a cardboard box.

Justin was the first to step forward, taking out one of the pairs of glasses – thick, ugly things that almost seemed to have a greenish tint to them – and put them on. His brow shot up immediately, and he waved his hands and arms out in front of him. "Whoa, what's with the grandpa glasses?" he asked. "I can barely see my beautiful hands in front of my beautiful face!" The perspective shifted to demonstrate what he was seeing, which little more than an incredibly blurry shot of the forest and some unknown body of water with a couple vaguely hand-shaped objects waving in front of the lens.

"Dorktacular goggles won't make part two easy," Chris said, "or _attractive_ ," he shrugged, "but it can be done. In theory."

The campers groaned.

"Competitors, take your positions!" he said, and the footage flashed forward to show Cameron and Lindsay together near the edge of the first platform, Lindsay still looking at her new glasses unhappily. "First up at the Kick Start it's Cameron against Lindsay," the host said before the shot moved on to the next pair. "Then, it's Courtney versus Jasmine," the two girls crossed their arms and exchanged unflinching, if blurry, stares before the shot pulled back to show the cannons, "versus the _Cannonballs_."

"Gwen faces Trent in Wrecking Ball Alley," the musician smiled at his opponent, who blushed bashfully and looked backward, rubbing her arm. "Leonard is up against Zoey in the Gang Plank," the camera cut to the base of the ladder then panned all the way up to it to the two nervous teens on top, "Noah and Justin will battle _Double Trouble_ ," the snarker looked warily at the butt-shaped apparatus in front of him while the male model tried to look at his reflection in his hand mirror, "and, Izzy will fight Harold for the Grand Slam." The young woman was shown giddily looking at her own hands while the young man raised an eyebrow at her then followed suit, the shot moving out to show the baseball mitt.

"First team to finish wins the _whoooole shebang_ ," Chris explained. "And, the other team loses a member tonight! Since it's a relay race," he added, "you'll need something to pass: your _mascots_ ," he said with a grin. "Oh, intern~!"

A scrawny white boy with his long black hair flipped over his eyes walked up to Cameron and Lindsay holding a pair of pet carriers; whatever was inside was snarling angrily enough for the two competitors to exchanges a wary look. "Team _Rat_ gets a mutant _rat_ ," Chris announced as the intern thrust a large, squealing, six-legged hairless rat into Cameron's arms, and the bubble-boy recoiled to keep himself from being clawed. "And Team _Maggot_ gets," the host continued, "a mutant _maggot_."

A dramatic tune played as a large, slimy green maggot was thrust into Lindsay's arms. " _Eww_ , I don't _like_ maggots," she said in disgust.

"Aaaand," Chris said as he prepared an airhorn, "go!"

At the sound of the horn and the start of the series' typical tense challenge music the giant boot swung down on the two campers. With a yelp Cameron managed to duck out of the way, but Lindsay was not so lucky and got sent flying with a scream. She landed in the mud between platforms, but kept the maggot held high. It burped as Chris said "And _Lindsay_ gets the _boot_! "

"This is _exhilarating_!" Cameron said in excitement as he hopped across the gap between platforms with the rat in his arms.

"Cameron takes the early lead," the host continued, and the bubble-boy ran up to Courtney.

"Good work, just like we planned it," the former CIT said as she took the rat from him, then turned and ran off down the course.

"Maybe I'm better at this than I thought," Cameron said, brushing his hands together as he walked back the opposite way...and blindly fell into the gap between platforms, landing with a squelch of mud.

The shot cut to Courtney as she ran along her part of the platform. "Okay," she told herself, squinting through her glasses to try and see the path better, "it should be just a little bit-"

She cut herself off when she slammed face-first into a post,. "What the...?" she said, recoiling a few steps and shaking off the dazing. "Who put _this_ here?" she asked irritably, sidestepping around the post. She only got another two steps before a sudden cannon volley through the floor in front of her forced her to a stop with a scream.

"Oh no," Lindsay groaned to herself, now covered in mud as she ran along the first part of the platform with her maggot held out in front of her. She jumped the gap, and soon reached an impatient Jasmine. "We're not _too_ far behind, are we?" the blonde asked as she held out their team's mascot in what wasn't quite the right direction.

"Nothing I can't handle, so hand it over!" Jasmine barked, forcefully grabbing the maggot and dashing off, leaving Lindsay to whimper.

"The Maggots take the lead!" Chris called out as Jasmine caught up to Courtney at the start of the cannonball run. Another cannon fired towards them, forcing both girls to dart and duck out of the way.

"Okay," Jasmine said with a hint of nervousness, "this is easy! Just gotta dodge a bunch of cannons I can barely see, that's all!" She gulped and charged forward, leaving Courtney to gasp indignantly and chase after her.

The tense music softened slightly as the scene moved to Trent and Gwen waiting at the start of the next leg, anxiously listening to the sound of cannonfire behind them. The musician took out a small reddish rabbit's foot charm and tapped it on his forehead, muttering "One-two-three-four-five-six-seven-eight- _nine_!" under his breath.

"Uhh, I get the lucky rabbit's foot," Gwen asked with an odd look, "but what's with the nine taps?"

"Nine's my lucky number," Trent shrugged. "I figured it couldn't hurt, right?" He stopped there as he and Gwen heard someone coming, then looked back at each other. "Well, this is me," he said as Jasmine ran up and thrust the maggot into his arms.

"Move, Trent, _move_!" Jasmine commanded.

"Good luck!" the musician waved back to Gwen as he ran off. The challenge music rose up again as he tried to quickly sidle along the rolling log, but with his blurry vision directed at his feet he missed the wrecking ball swinging down at him. It caught him in the slide and sent him flying with a scream, all the way to a shocked and startled Zoey and Leonard.

The shot briefly cut away to Chris and Chef sitting in green armchairs watching the challenge feed on a wide screen television set up nearby; they laughed uproariously as they watched Trent get hit and land.

"Hurry up, hurry up, hurry _up_!" Courtney yelled frantically as she ran up to Gwen and handed over their rat. The goth nodded, the narrowed her eyes as she turned and ran towards the rolling logs.

"Here you go," Trent said weakly as the shot cut back to him passing the maggot to Zoey. "And good luck!"

"Thanks," Zoey told him before jumping on to the first precariously isolated platform. It immediately started to wobble and sink, and Zoey cried out in alarm as the camera quick-panned to the base revealing the two mutant beavers making quick work of the pole. The focus moved back to the top as Zoey tried to jump to the next platform, only for the one she was standing on to wobble in just the right way to cause her to fall down into the mud. "Oh no...," she said as she recovered and saw the two ferocious-looking beavers she had landed between.

"And _Zoey_ takes a dive!" Chris announced as the shot moved back to Gwen crossing the rolling logs. "Will the Rats be able to retake the lead?"

"I sure hope so," Gwen told herself, looking up and back just in time to see the wrecking ball swinging towards her. She steeled herself and jumped up, safely grabbing on to the ball and allowing it to carry her forward. With a giddy "Woo hoo!" she jumped off at the extent of its swing, and sailed further on through the air.

The shot cut back to Zoey, who was now being held by one beaver while the other hungrily took out a bottle of ketchup. "Please, let me go!" the redhead struggled, the maggot held close to her body. The second beaver opened the bottle of ketchup and licked its lips, causing Zoey to gasp...then scowl. "I said, let me _go_!" she said forcefully, kicking first the ketchup-holding beaver and then the her-holding beaver between their legs, causing each to squeal in pain and fall over onto their backs holding their groins.

"Ooh, sorry," Zoey told them with genuine concern, "but I _did_ tell you to stop!"

She turned and ran off through the mud without another word, and Chris announced "And the _Maggots_ are in it again!"

"Get going, Leonard!" Gwen told the wizard as she handed the rat over to him. He immediately nodded and turned, but paused when the goth added "And don't waste time with any _spells_!"

"Like I can even _cast_ anything right now," Leonard huffed, rolling his eyes behind his glasses. "Acrobatics skill, don't fail me now!" he said as he turned forward again and hopped to the first platform. It immediately wobbled, but he was able to hop to the next one before he fell – and this one seemed more stable.

The camera quick-panned down to the beavers as they got back on their feet and growled, then forward under the course to Zoey, who had just started climbing up the supports of the next section of platform. "Oh no," she said as she tried to look back, "I hope that's not what I _think_ it is."

The shot cut to the top where Noah and Justin were awaiting, the former more alertly than the latter.

"Hey, do you think bouncing on those things is gonna leave any bruises?" the model asked idly. "Because if so, maybe I should've done one of the _other_ legs."

"Probably," Noah answered offhandedly, distracted by the fact that Leonard had finally gotten to the platform.

"Salutations, comrade!" he greeted cheerfully as Noah dashed over to him. "I have-"

"Yeah yeah yeah," Noah said quickly, grabbing the mutant rat from him, "good job Gandalf, now let me get this _over_ with already!" He turned and dashed down the course, just as Zoey finally climbed up to the top of the platform with her team's maggot.

"And Noah _finally_ gets the Rats' lead back!" Chris announced as the camera followed the snarker up to the Double Trouble apparatus.

"Oh, why did I sign up for this?" Noah lamented as he threw himself on to the first butt-shaped thing, landed on his face, and bounced off it with a cry of pain. He continued on in this way, painfully bouncing from one to the next until eventually he reached the end. "Izzy, _take it_!" he yelled to his teammate, the redhead waiting with her back turned at the edge of the next platform, apparently whistling to herself.

Despite stretching his rat-holding arms out towards her as he fell, he was unable to make the pass-off in time before falling completely past her and landing in the mud. "Huh?" Izzy said as she finally turned around. "Did you say something?"

The shot cut to Noah face down in the mud, bubbles forming around his head as he vented a scream of frustration and the mutant rat scampered out of his grasp. With a gasp and a groan Noah scrambled to his feet and chased after it.

"Justin, hurry up and take it already!" Zoey told her incredibly attractive teammate as the shot cut back to her holding the muddy and slimy maggot out to him.

"But it's so _disgusting_!" Justin countered. "I mean, I like the occasional mud bath, but _this_? This is a little too much, I mean who _knows_ what mutant maggot slime could do to my complexion. You don't want me to risk my _complexion_ , do you?" he asked her, flashing a smile that would have been breathtaking had it not been for the hideous glasses he was wearing.

Zoey moaned uncertainly for a second as she stared at him through her own glasses, then shook it away and thrust the mutant maggot into the supermodel's face. " _Please_ , just go already!"

Justin's eyes briefly widened at the maggot's sudden closeness, and his face settled into a disgusted grimace as he hesitantly reached out for the mutated larva.

It promptly vomited onto his face.

"Okay, okay, I'll do it!" he screamed in terror, turning and running off down the course. The perspective briefly changed to show the blurry obstacle that Justin was approaching, the changed back to his head-on close-up as he became visibly distressed.

"Okay incredibly well-toned body, don't fail me now!" Justin told himself just as he jumped onto the first butt-shaped object; he landed on his chest with a pained yelp and bounced off, continuing on painfully from one bouncy apparatus to the next until eventually he landed on his chest on the far platform with a slam and a groan.

" _Yes_!" Harold said, eagerly taking the maggot from him.

"And Justin takes back the lead!" Chris announced, the camera cutting to him and Chef on their chairs. "Maybe he's got more than just looks, although," he paused to chuckle, "he might not have _those_ for much longer."

"Such a _shame_ , too," Chef chimed in, tutting and shaking his head in disappointment.

"Alright, time to show off my mad skills!" Harold declared confidently, turning proudly towards the end of the course.

"Just don't screw this up, Doris!" Justin told him, causing him to pause in mid-step and wheel around.

"Don't call me that!" Harold told the model. "It's _embarrassing_ and I'm your _teammate_ , remember?"

"I remember," Justin replied, growing both anxious and irritated. "But could you _please_ just get _going_?"

"That's what I was doing, _gosh_!" Harold said, turning back around and running off towards the ropes at the end of the platform in his odd, leaned-back running posture.

The camera panned back to the left, passing Justin and reaching Izzy just as a panting Noah forced their team's mascot into her arms. "Here, take it!" he commanded.

"Aww, isn't he the _cutest_?" Izzy cooed, raising the bewildered rat up into the air.

"As a button," Noah said in utter disbelief, "now _RUN_!" He raised his arms as he shouted, and the gesture seemed to finally startle Izzy into action.

"Okay, okay! Keep your _shirt_ on, Noah!" she said in a wide-eyed near-panic as she turned and ran off down the course. The camera followed her, zooming in as her expression settled into a dangerous and giddy grin, then back out as she raced by a shocked Harold. The camera panned further to the right to show the oversized baseball bats and mitt, and with a few cries of "Hut!" and "Hup!" the red-headed wild child leaped and flipped and bounded to the end of the platform, grabbed one of the ropes that had been loosely tied there, and swung off with an appropriate warbled cry.

She passed between the first two baseball bats, then slammed straight into the third.

Back at the edge of the platform, Harold cringed as a flat note played and a squelch signaled that Izzy had landed in the mud below. "Well, I guess it's my turn," he said nervously as he grabbed the end of the other rope. He unleashed his own terrified cry as he swung blindly through the Grand Slam, and almost made it to the mitt – but slammed into one of the last bats with his legs spread wide. His pained groans as he slid down into the mud had a noticeably higher pitch.

The footage skipped ahead to show a muddy Izzy running up for her second go, the ropes once again tied to a post on the side of the platform. "Okay, let's see, what do I do _this_ time," she asked herself, rubbing her chin in thought.

"How about you land in the _mitt_!" Noah called out to her irritably, the shot cutting to show him and the other Rats standing on a nearby platform without the glasses that had been forced on them.

"And _quickly_!" Courtney chimed in.

"Guys, that's what I'm trying to _do_!" Izzy shot back at them in annoyance. "I know what I'm doing, okay? I'm like an Olympic master at vine swinging, so just let me work!" She turned around with a huff, then smiled and snapped her fingers. "Ooh, I know!" she said, grabbing one of the ropes again and jumping off. She chose to forgo the warbling cry this time, sticking her legs out in front of her and passing by each bat in turn. She finally stopped when her feet hit the mitt, but she had failed to let go of the rope. Stretched between it and the mitt she tried to pull herself up to her goal, but slipped and fell back into the mud.

Cameron, Courtney, Gwen, Leonard, and Noah all groaned.

The camera panned past them and on to Harold, who had grabbed his own rope again and was sizing up his next swing. "I just need to get the angle and timing right," he told himself, tucking the maggot under his arm as he used his fingers to frame his target. "Got it," he nodded after a few seconds.

The music turned triumphant as he ran forward and swung off with a cry of "Excelsior!" He quickly passed all the bats, and the peak of his swing put him just about over the mitt. It was then that he let go of the rope and fell down towards the goal. His butt clipped the mitt's fingertips, however, and he ended up landing in it on the back of his head.

"The Maggots win!" Chris announced, and the maggot mascot vomited down onto Harold's face. The nerd moaned in pain and disgust.

Lindsay, Jasmine, Trent, Zoey, and Justin cheered, having also discarded their glasses, while the five nearby members of the Toxic Rats groaned once more.

"To the Maggots, the spoils," Chris announced as Chef walked over to the winning team holding some kind of gift basket. "McLean Brand Soap, Shampoo, and Conditioner. Guaranteed to wash off the stink!" A pleasant jingle played over a close-up of the gift basket, showing off its contents against a radiant yellow background.

"Hey, these are almost _decent_ ," Justin said with a smile, picking a bottle out of the basket and looking at it closely. "Nice work, Harold!" he called out to his off-screen teammate.

"Rats, see you at the elimination ceremony!' Chris added with his usual smile.

The five members of the Rats groaned for a third time. "I can't _believe_ this!" Courtney exclaimed in exasperation. "We can _not_ be this bad at challenges!"

"Hey, it's not that bad," Leonard said cheerily. "We've only lost _twice_! We can still recover, especially since we have _magic_ on our side."

Courtney screamed with rage and lunged at him, Gwen and Cameron quickly moving to hold her back.

" _Yeah_ , I don't think she wanted to hear that right now," Noah told Leonard, both boys looking shocked.

"Apparently," Leonard replied.

/

The footage flashed ahead to all of the Toxic Rats except for Noah and Izzy assembled at the steps leading up to their cabin. The camera focused on Courtney, who was standing on the ground in front of the others, and took a deep breath before beginning. "Okay guys, I've given it some thought, and I think we should vote out _Izzy_ tonight. It's clear that we can't count on her."

"Aww, don't say that!" Leonard replied. "I know she's a little _spirited_ but if we just give her another chance I'm sure she'll be a great boon to us!"

"More like a great _flake_ ," Gwen said. "The way she acts I honestly don't think she lives in the same world as us."

"She _is_ rather unpredictable," Cameron added, a finger on his chin in thought. "And she kind of scares me a little, if I'm being honest."

"C'mon, she's _harmless_!" Leonard interjected, looking around at the faces of his teammates – Cameron uncertain, Gwen annoyed and unamused, and Courtney with pursed lips. "Right?" Leonard finished with an almost desperate look.

/

The footage flashed ahead again to show the Toxic Rats at the campfire pit, Chef and Chris standing before them with their respective marshmallows.

"Ready?" the host asked after a few drum beats opened the elimination music. "Everyone gets a marshmallow, even the loser!" The shot cut to a close-up of the strongbox in Chef's mitted hands. "But that's one marshmallow you do _not_ wanna eat," Chris added as his assistant flipped the lid up and revealed the bright glowing thing inside.

"To the votes! The following people are safe," the host said, picking up the first normal marshmallow off his tray. "Courtney." The former CIT caught her prize with a level stare.

"Cameron." The bubble-boy next to her was next, still eager as he caught his marshmallow.

"Gwen." Next came the goth, slumped forward with her head on her hand and her elbow on her leg. She raised her free left hand and caught her prize without a second glance.

"Noah." He smirked as his marshmallow fell into his open hands.

"Which leaves, Izzy and _Leonard_ ," Chris announced, earning a nervous look from the wizard and a shocked look from the wild child.

" _Me_? But why?" Izzy said in breathless shock.

"And the Marshmallow of _Loserdom_ goes to," Chris said, trailing off as the camera slowly zoomed in on the faces of the bottom two campers and the telltale sound of an approaching helicopter rose up in the background.

" _I_ -" the host began before a sudden voice interrupted him.

"IZZY! WE KNOW YOU ARE DOWN THERE!" the voice said over a megaphone, the shot cutting up to a helicopter painted in the blue, yellow, and red of the Royal Canadian Mounted Police. "YOU ARE UNDER ARREST!" the voice added as the helicopter's spotlight was turned on and moved across the cast members assembled around the pit below.

"Wait, so all that stuff you were saying was _true_?" Gwen asked Izzy in shock.

"No," Izzy answered happily, "just the RCMP part." She stood up, pointed dramatically at the helicopter, and shouted "YOU'LL NEVER GET ME _ALIIIIVE_!" as the music rose up intensely. The Wild Child ran off laughing past a shocked Chris and Chef, the helicopter giving chase with the spotlight firmly on her.

"Crap, Chef, you gotta go after her!" Chris told his assistant in a panic. "We gotta get her off the island before the Feds start searching closely!"

Chef, still in his hazmat suit, only nodded before chasing off after the echoing laughter of Izzy.

The camera cut back to the remaining members of the Toxic Rats and panned across their utterly shocked faces, ending on Leonard who looked down and sighed sadly.

xxx

"Well, there goes my alliance," the wizard sadly told the outhouse camera. "I guess it's time to find some _other_ way to avoid certain elimination." He took his spellbook out of his sleeves, and started flipping through the pages.

xxx

The series' somber elimination theme began to play as the footage cut over to the Dock of Shame, the camera zoomed in on Chris.

"Well, the _good_ news is, the RCMP left the island," he told the camera. "The _bad_ news is, we have no idea where _Izzy_ is so we can't give her the Hurl of Shame."

The shot zoomed out, revealing the catapult in question nearby with Chef Hatchet sitting warily in its bucket.

"Chris, man, why am I up here again?" the hulking man asked nervously.

"Because _somebody_ needs to get hurled tonight," Chris explained as he walked over to the catapult's lever, "and I figure that since _you_ lost Izzy, you need to be punished."

"W-wait, don't be so-" Chef frantically tried to say before Chris unflinchingly launched him into the air. "HASTYYYYYYY!" the hulking man finished with a scream as he disappeared into the night.

Chris took a deep breath, then smiled as the series' capstone theme started up. "And that's that! Two hurls down, _hopefully_ eleven to go! Who will be eliminated next?" he asked the camera. "Tune in, and find out, on Total! Drama! Revenge! Of! The _Island_!"

(Fade to Credits)

* * *

 **Author's Note - Post Script**

Not much to say here this week. As the first episode was all about introducing the new cast, this week starts setting up some of the interactions, friendships, rivalries, subplots, and so on that'll develop throughout the season.

Regarding the first part of the challenge and why I decided to have it end more-or-less the same as canon...well, I figured that from a story perspective the point of it was less to reveal a few embarrassing secrets and more to A) introduce Fang, and B) get people to argue a bit and draw out some conflicting personalities and whatnot. That, of course, was better served by having it end early, and figuring out exactly how the characters could react in order to get to that point was an interesting experience.

Izzy is, I think, a natural choice for second boot, especially given how it went down in canon. As you all no doubt recall this was Dakota's canon boot episode, and it ended up kicking off her development. I'm not gonna say if Izzy is going to go the same was as Dakota or anything, but if you need an early boot who still ends up being a recurring character, Izzy is a top choice - it's her main role in canon. She's just too hard to get rid of, and we certainly haven't seen the last of her this season.

Though I did attempt to give her canon-flavored exit a bit of season four spice with Chris' reaction.

But yeah, that's pretty much it as far as I can recall. Let me know what you all think, and I'll see you all next week.

\- Fangren

* * *

 **Appendix: TSROTI Eliminated Contestants**

Cody - (13th Place)

Izzy - (12th Place | Still on the loose...?)


	3. Chapter 3 - Ice Ice Baby

**Author's Note**

Here we are again, folks! Hard to believe we're already at the third chapter, and with the fourth chapter already done it means that about a third of the season has been written...that's the thing with these 13-episode deals, they go by so quickly.

It makes it that much harder to make sure everyone gets some proper exposure and development before they leave, but somehow in this chapter and next week's I'm really satisfied with what I've been able to do.

But enough about that - it's time to answer some reviews.

 **Elizabeth Fire Ice Heart:** Haha, true..but luckily there, uh, may have been some time for him to cool off about it, both literally and figuratively...

 **Gage the Hedgehog:** Thanks!

 **atom king:** Unfortunately, who does or doesn't get mutated this season is something I'm not going to spoil, so you'll just have to wait and see.

 **DSX62415:** Mm, yeah, I figured most people would be okay with the usual Izzy path. And as for Trent's lucky number, I think he may just bring up its origins, although ultimately it depends on how things develop between them.

 **moka evans:** Okay, good to hear that! And yeah, Noah is certainly the type to plan ahead and get the idol before he really needs it. I'm glad you like what I'm doing with Izzy; her being Fang's foil while also still leaving and coming back just made the most sense to me. The same thing with Trent and his lucky number; him being so superstitious and using that number as a way to cope just gives him an interesting dimension that I figured more people would include in their stories. Justin's hotness...ehh. He's a 16-year-old cartoon male, it's hard to judge. But I can accept that being super-attractive is what he's meant to be.

 **acosta perez jose ramiro:** Thanks! And yeah, that's pretty much what I was thinking - the fact that Izzy is willing and able to fight back against Fang is gonna shake things up a bit with him this season.

 **P. T. Piranha:** Thanks, thanks, and I'm glad to hear that you can accept why I cut the first challenge short. Likewise, I can understand why you'd find Izzy to be a bit much at times. And yeah, the villainy this season...is gonna be interesting, I think (and hope).

 **ashDanLand:** Glad to hear you loved it! I'm glad you enjoyed Izzy, and even Leonard a bit? And yeah, I think I remember Courtney mentioning anger problems once as well. And as for whether or not anybody will end up a monster...well, I'm afraid you're just gonna have to wait and see.

 **Call Me Ishmael:** Well, all I can say is that your predictions are interesting as always, and that I'm glad you're enjoying things so far.

 **Animation Adventures:** I'm glad you enjoyed how Izzy's elimination played out! Chris is definitely annoyed that Izzy got the RCMP's attention, and we'll no doubt see more of that as the season progresses. Though as for what'll happen in episode seven...well, you'll see when the story gets there. I'm glad you enjoyed the canon facts that I worked in as well; Harold's middle name was just such an obvious thing to use there, as was Cameron's diaper thing. And then Trent's lucky number...well, that part of Trent interests me greatly, and its a shame how it was used in canon. Anyway, I hope this week's episode lives up to your expectations!

 **The Prime Writer:** (They did actually end up PMing me their thoughts about all the characters this season, and while I did reply there I'll also include anything particularly relevant in this section as well.)  
Basically: Leonard and Izzy aren't romantically involved and I wasn't even considering that when I wrote them.  
I'm actually pretty happy with the direction I've taken Leonard in so far and he's honestly kinda grown on me.  
Gwen and Trent being on opposite teams from the start is something I think will give an interesting twist to how their relationship develops.  
I'm wary of getting Zoey romantically involved with anyone since it consumed so much of her character in canon.  
I dislike the idea of Izzy and Scarlett being related.  
Harold probably won't have a chance to show off his beatboxing in the main series but if I ever revisit this universe after the main stuff is done then him and Beardo meeting is something I'd like to do.  
I'm happy that I've been able to portray Jasmine as someone who's self-conscious of her height and how she intimidates people since it helps make her more human.  
Lindsay is someone who needs a lot of time to really develop as a character, and with a shorter season it makes it harder to pull it off.  
I dislike how much 'Mary-Sue' is used and don't think it applies to Zoey; I like Zoey's early portrayal of being friendless and full of anxiety and want to work more with that.  
I'm worried that I won't be able to meet people's expectations for how funny Noah should be.  
Courtney is divisive but a lot of the bad stuff she's done probably stems from her unjust elimination at Harold's hands in TDI and the rage stemming from it, and as such shouldn't be much of an issue here.

 **Sarcasm is a Habit:** Haha, well, you aren't the first reviewer who's accidentally Guested themselves, and I doubt you'll be the last. I'm glad you're enjoying the story so far, and I hope you keep on doing so. I'm probably gonna get around to reviewing the next chapter of your story on Saturday, and maybe get two in if I have the time.

 **Tokusatsu-31st Century:** Hmm, well, Izzy's the one who has Fang's tooth right now, and even though she was eliminated she's still on the island somewhere. It's only a matter of time before she and Fang cross paths again...

 **I. M. Poik:** Haha, yup. Izzy being Fang's target/rival of sorts for the season was something I figured was both natural, and interesting considering Izzy's early boot. But like I told Tokusatsu-31st Century, it's only a matter of time before Fang and Izzy cross paths again. Jasmine's love life...is something you'll have to see unfold for yourself. And as for Leonard, well, even if I do develop him he's still gonna be himself, so it's only natural that he'd do some of the same things. Oh, and because I don't think I'll ever get around to revealing it otherwise, I'll just confirm now that it was in fact Leonard who booked a room at the wrong hotel, and he was pretty mortified by it. Make of that what you will.

 **FOWLKON:** Hmm, well, I won't say what my plans are for anyone becoming a mutant, but I am happy that you're enjoying how Leonard and Noah play off each other. Leonard, I think, is someone that really needs the right characters to play off of in order to work, and I'm glad Noah has fit that role. With Justin, I don't think he's quite as bad as Duncan ever was - he certainly doesn't think much of Harold, and was willing to mock him a bit, but only to a point. But yeah, they're definitely not friends. Zoey's indie-ness and potential for development in that regard is one of the reasons why I decided to separate her from Cameron; I want to see how she develops without any of her canon relationships to fall back on.  
Having Pahkitew Island before All-Stars...is not something I think I'm gonna do, sorry. It does make sense in a lot of ways, but since a big part of me wants to keep everything on schedule so I can get other parts of my life in order, I don't want to have to either make up new challenges to compensate for an expanded cast (probably up to 18, with 6 from each generation), or force myself to choose only 14 cast members out of all three generations, especially since it would mean cutting a lot of people from the first two casts that I feel deserve a shot.

 **PizzaTheBomb:** Thanks! And yeah, things started off a bit small but they'll get much bigger in these next two weeks, at the very least. I hope you enjoy what happens!

 **OMAC001:** Okay, good to hear!

 **The Misguided Angel of Death:** Mmm-hmm, Zoey is, I think, definitely somebody Jasmine would try to take under her wing, much like she did with Sammy. And of course Gwen and Courtney are beginning to clash, as they were destined to...though what becomes of it, and Noah's idol hunt, is something you'll just have to read on and maybe find out.

 **CVluvFoxy:** Haha, I know, this is way more reviews than I was expecting. But hey, no worries, review when you can. Courtney and Leonard aside, I'm glad you're enjoying the cast. I have a couple interesting ideas about what to do with the villainy this season, and I'm excited to see how it all works out. The same with the heroes - there's gonna be a lot of things going on, I think, especially since Izzy's still around somewhere. And then there's Noah, who is someone who I know is gonna be hard to live up to everyone's expectations for, but I'm confident with what I have planned for him. And, of course, interesting predictions as always.

 **bruno14:** Mmm, yeah, Izzy's just hard to get rid of for very long. Harold/Jasmine...well, I won't spoil how that might develop. Cameron is certainly gaining confidence, and Justin is willing to risk his looks sometimes...but again, you'll have to wait and see where that leads. But other than that, I'm glad you're enjoying the cast and their interactions.

 **VIPGuest:** Well, that or I just couldn't think of how to dismiss it :) And yeah, having an elimination every episode (or nearly every episode) certainly makes it tough to give everyone development, but I think I'm handling it well so far. As for making Lindsay a bigger dimwit...ehh. That doesn't really appeal to me, sorry.

 **Knifez:** True. I figured the bit with Fang might throw people off a bit, but since this is Izzy we're talking about it was always gonna be fairly obvious what would happen with her. And I think I'll say that I've enjoyed writing a few Noah-Gwen interactions in these next two episodes...  
And yeah, it's weird for me too going from the first gen group where I really only had Tyler and Ella that had to be fleshed out, to this new group where everyone is technically starting from scratch. It...keeps me on my toes, I guess. I'm disappointed you feel that way about Harold, but hey, like you said by the end of this week or some week in the future your opinion on him (or others, depending on who makes it that far) could have totally changed.

 **Lulu'sBackInTown:** ...good question. In retrospect, I really should have had the bottom two as Izzy and Courtney, as Izzy and Leonard almost certainly voted for the bossy CIT.

 **Aztec 13:** Well, I wouldn't call it the end for Izzy - or at least not the final one. And as for Noah's similarity to Scott, and how that might be a predictor of how he ends up this season...sorry, but I'm staying silent on that matter.

 **Ddynamo:** Again, thank you so much for the vigilance in spotting plagiarizers. And yeah, you were definitely spot-on about Izzy getting the boot last week. The idol is something I have a couple ideas for, so I'm looking forward to seeing how it plays out. And as for Leonard...well, you'll find out eventually.

 **Explorer of the Unknown:** Yeah, I think it was what a lot of people were expecting, even moreso once the chapter got going and Izzy started annoying her teammates. As for her becoming a mutant, as well as her relationship with Fang...well, you'll have to wait and see what I have in store. And I'm glad that it isn't so clear what I'll be doing in terms of the next elimination, and the villains, and the idol...it's nice to have things up in the air at this point. I'm glad you're impressed by my handling of Leonard - being aware that he's on the bottom of the team is just a simple thing for him to do, and it's only the beginning. I hope you enjoy what becomes of him and all the others this week.

 **Star Saber21:** Presumably they wanted to honor some important dead relative or something? I don't know, it's just my guess. I'm glad you enjoyed Courtney attacking Leonard in parallel to Lightning attacking Sam in canon; once I rewatched that scene I knew Courtney and Leonard would work great in it.

 **Moonlights Glow:** Ah, I see. Well, this is Izzy we're talking about - she won't stay away forever. And yeah, it certainly seems like Leonard's facing a tough crowd, as it were, but only time will tell if he'll be able to survive. And yeah, I did imply that Leonard and Izzy aligned together at the end of the first episode - Leonard initially approached Gwen only, but then Izzy just sort of popped up and joined as well. And since they were able to vote Cody off, it's implied that the alliance did become a thing...but only for that elimination, as Gwen didn't want anything to do with Izzy after that.  
And yeah, the glasses were definitely the same style as Harold's. But while I did consider having the lenses be the same too, I decided that Chris would probably think ahead and change them to make thing difficult for everybody.

 **link9753:** Hmm, well, you'll just have to wait and see how the eliminations play out, I'm afraid. Interesting predictions, though, and i look forward to seeing if and how those change throughout the season.

 **wifishark:** Well, you'll just have to wait and see what happens I'm afraid.

And yet again, those are finally out of the way for the week. As a reminder, the current teams are as follows:

Toxic Rats: Cameron, Courtney, Gwen, Leonard, Noah

Mutant Maggots: Harold, Jasmine, Justin, Lindsay, Trent, Zoey

And lastly, the usual bit at the end: **_a TVTropes page for this series exists_** , and as per usual with such things, could always use more work. I thoroughly appreciate those who've already been working on it, and look forward to seeing what you all add next.

We've got...well, quite the challenge this week, dear readers! I hope you enjoy.

\- Fangren

* * *

 **Episode 3 – Ice Ice Baby**

"Last time, on Total Drama Revenge of the Island!" Chris opened on the now-typical shot of the somewhat decrepit Camp. "We learned that although our campers are here to _win_ ," the recap montage began with the two recently-awoken team assembled before the host, "they're all _losers_ in one way or another," Noah was shown fleeing in terror from a mutant woolly beaver during the flashback of his Chris Head hunt. "Really, _really_ big losers," Chris added over shots of Fang chomping off the corner of the Maggots' stand, and Cameron blushing and shrinking into his seat in embarrassment.

"It was a _psychological_ butt-kicking that quickly turned literal," Chris continued as Harold was shown sizing up the angle of his final swing into the Grand Slam, and Lindsay got kicked forward by the Kick Start. "Then comical," the host added as Noah was shown painfully bouncing from one butt-shaped apparatus to the next, "then _hysterical_!" Chris finished with a laugh as Harold's first try at the Grand Slam was shown, ending with the dweeb hitting a giant bat with his groin.

"In the end, Izzy got the boot..." Izzy was shown growing nervous as the elimination came down to her and Leonard, "or she _would_ have," the host added bitterly as the spotlight swept across the campfire pit, "if she hadn't ran off when the _RCMP_ came for her." Izzy's last stand was shown, as was Chris hastily ordering Chef to catch her. " _Yeah_ , I'm still a little _peeved_ about that," the host finished, the clip of him hurling Chef into the night ending the recap montage.

"Stay tuned," he said with a more typical enthusiasm as the scene cut to him on the Dock of Shame, "as more things _blow up_! More contestants _throw up_ ," he clutched his throat loosely, "and some even try to _hook up_ ," he made a heart shape with his fingers. Right here, on Total! Drama! Revenge of the Island!"

xxx

(Fade to Opening Theme)

 _Dear Mom and Dad, I'm doin' fine;_

 _You guys are on my mind!_

 _Ya asked me what I wanted to be,_

 _And now I think the answer is plain to see!_

 _I wanna be...famous!_

 _I wanna live close to the sun!_

 _Well pack your bags, 'cause I've already won!_

 _Everythin' to prove, nothin' in my way;_

 _I'll get there one day._

 _'Cause I wanna be...famous!_

 _(Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

 _I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

 _I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

(Fade to Episode)

xxx

The episode opened on Camp Wawanakwa's lodge and mess hall, the camera panning to the left to show the communal bathroom and, more importantly, a cluster of bushes. The shot zoomed in as one of them began to rustle, and a mouse with a bulging, veiny head scurried out into the open. It paused as the shadow of a bird of prey fell over it, and looked up to see a bald eagle diving towards it with its talons out.

The music peaked sharply as the mutant mouse's eyes glowed green, and a beam shot out of them and hit the approaching eagle. The bird froze in mid-air, then slammed back and forth as though in the grasp of some unseen hand. It was finally tossed off-camera with a squawk, and the mutant mouse scurried onward. It climbed the steps of the main lodge and crawled through a hole in the door, and the scene cut inside.

The camera, situated high on the right wall relative to the entrance, showed the two teams eating and the lodge itself in a state of near disrepair. The floor had become a patchwork of different colors and styles; one of the front windows had been broken and halfheartedly boarded up; there was a gaping hole in the roof over the other front window; a few planks were missing from the far left wall around the fireplace; and a bit of wallpaper was peeling on the partition dividing the kitchen from the rest of the lodge.

The five members of the Toxic Rats sat at the forward table, to the left of the camera, while the six Mutant Maggots sat closer to the kitchen; and although the former team's table had a grimy and tattered table cloth, both teams had only logs to sit on.

Cameron, with Jasmine and Harold just visible over his shoulder, hesitantly stuck a spoonful of the grayish food they'd been served into his mouth, cringed, and spat it back into his bowl. "What _is_ this stuff?" he asked, picking up the bowl and peering at it more closely. "It doesn't taste even _remotely_ edible!"

"It's _gruel_ , kid," Noah said dryly, the perspective inverting to show him idly stirring his own bowl of breakfast. "It's not supposed to."

xxx

"Yeah, with the way our ' _meals_ ' are turning out," Noah told the outhouse camera, "my life-threatening allergies are gonna be the _least_ of my dietary woes."

xxx

The shot cut to Lindsay and Justin at the right end of the Maggots' table, their backs to the kitchen. "Do you think this gruel is low-carb?" the blonde asked, picking a hair out of her spoonful.

"I think it's probably low _everything_ ," Justin answered before looking up from his own breakfast, noticing something just off-camera, and nudging Lindsay with his elbow. "But I think there's a _bigger_ issue," he told her in a low voice, discretely pointing down the table.

"So anyway," Zoey said to Harold as the perspective changed to show them eating side-by-side, Courtney and Cameron and Noah and Gwen visible just over the indie girl's shoulder, "nobody back home really, like, _gets_ me, you know? They just don't understand why I like all those old 80s movies, or why I can't _stand_ pop music."

"Totally," Harold nodded in understanding. "I, too, know the pain of having nobody that _truly_ appreciates my skills and interests."

The perspective changed again, now showing Jasmine and Trent eating across from Harold and Zoey. "It's good the two of you came out here," the tall girl told her teammates between scoops of gruel. "Broaden your horizons and meet other people, y'know?" The two nodded happily, and Jasmine turned her attention to Trent, whose eyes kept flitting from his bowl of gruel to something off-screen. "What's the matter, mate?" Jasmine asked. "I know the gruel is terrible, but it's important to at _least_ get your stomach filled."

"Nah, it's not the gruel," Trent told her. "It's just...," he said, trailing off as he made a small vague gesture to the other table. The perspective shifted to show Gwen almost exactly across the room from Trent, currently trying to pull her spoon free from her gruel.

"Ohhhh," Jasmine said in comprehension as the shot cut back to her and Trent, the musician smiling bashfully.

xxx

"Yeah, I'll admit I have kind of a _thing_ for Gwen," Trent admitted. "She seems pretty smart and independent, and I dig girls like that."

xxx

"It's just a shame we're on opposite teams, though," Trent whispered to Jasmine, "it makes it hard to get to _know_ her, y'know? Hopefully we'll both make the merge."

"Somethin' to work for, then," Jasmine told him with a smile. "Just don't think the rest of us are gonna go easy on you just because you've got your eye on someone."

"Haha, I know, I know," Trent replied jovially. He smiled and sent a wave across the table, and the shot cut to show Gwen seeing it, then blushing faintly and waving back.

The camera pulled back from the goth to show Courtney sitting across from her, then rotated around to show the ex-CIT's lips pursed in annoyance. She quickly looked back over her shoulder, then asked "Was that _Trent_ again?"

"Yeah, so what?" Gwen answered in annoyance. "Don't tell me you're _still_ mad at the idea that I might be friendly with someone on the other team."

"He might try to use that _against_ us," Courtney hissed under her breath.

"Do you _honestly_ think I'd fall for something like that?" Gwen countered, her temper rising. "What kind of girl do you _take_ me for?"

Cameron was briefly shown watching the two girls nervously, but before he could speak up, the camera panned down to Leonard at the other end of their table, just past Gwen. Judging by the spellbook and quill pen laid out on the table next to his bowl he'd been writing in it, though now he was looking sternly at his teammates.

"Pardon me," he said, "but do you mind? I'm trying to think!"

"What, trying to figure out why your magic isn't working?" Noah asked, the camera panning to him and Gwen. "Because if you are, I've got some bad _news_ for you." Gwen smiled expectantly, and the camera panned back to Leonard, now in the middle of raising a spoonful of gruel that appeared to have two hairs sticking out of it.

"No, I already know it's 'cause of the toxic waste," the wizard explained offhandedly. "I'm just trying to figure out what to do about it." He moved to put the spoon in his mouth, only to stop at the last second. He looked down at the two hairs in his gruel, raised and eyebrow and plucked them out – or rather, the beetle the antennae were attached to.

"Zounds," Leonard said in muted awe. The beetle hissed angrily at him, but he quickly brushed a finger against its shell until it purred. "And thus, the bond of the wizard's familiar has been _forged_ ," Leonard declared, causing his teammates to exchange an odd look.

The shot cut back to Justin and Lindsay, who turned odd looks of their own away from the direction of the other table and down to the bulbous-headed mouse now sitting on their own table. "Aww, cute!" Lindsay gushed the moment she noticed it.

"Wait, no," Justin said in a rising panic as he noticed his teammate reaching out a finger towards the mutant. Without warning the mouse's eyes began to glow green again, and to the horror of the two Maggots it levitated into the air.

The scene moved outside the lodge as crashes and screams of terror filled the air. All the campers except Harold fled out the front door as dramatic music played, and a refrigerator was flung out after them. They paused to catch their breath, and it was then that Harold was finally tossed out to them with a low scream of his own.

The whine of the intercom turning on caught their attention, and the camera cut to an upward shot of the loudspeaker. "Attention, players!" Chris announced. "Please head to the looming tragedy that is Mount Looming Tragedy!" The shot switched to a tall, craggy spire of rock in the distance, it's broad and flat peak seen only in silhouette thanks to a ring of ominous clouds. "Your race begins, NOW!"

He punctuated his broadcast with his blowhorn, and Jasmine immediately turned to her teammates. "Let's move, Maggots!" she declared, and all elevens campers raced off – with Noah noticeably behind.

/

A flash ahead showed the two teams arriving at the base of the mountain, all of them out of breath except Jasmine.

" _Please_ tell me we get something for this," Trent panted, doubled over with his hands on his knees.

Cameron arrived last just then, clutching his stomach and groaning. He walked over to a bush, fell to his knees, and threw up.

"You okay there, Cameron?" Gwen asked in concern after the bubble-boy had stood back up and wiped the bile from his lips.

A sudden whistle interrupted any answer that may have come, drawing the campers' attention to the side. "Okay, _mutant food_ ," Chris greeted, standing with Chef next to a muddy jeep, "on with the challenge! Part one is an uphill battle," he explained, the shot moving to and upward pan of the rocky tower before them – it was covered with barbed wire, toxic waste barrels, and what looked like pipes of some kind. "You have to climb _all_ the way up to _that cliff_ ," Chris explained, the camera coming to a rest at the broad, flat rock that topped the mountain; a dead tree and another toxic waste barrel were the only things to be seen on top. "First team to reach the top gets an advantage in part two."

"You can climb with your hands," the host continued as the shot returned to him, "or use whatever you find in the pile." He motioned over his shoulder, and the camera cut to a large mound of junk – appliances, furniture, pipes, tires, and other abandoned pieces of scrap. "But don't worry," Chris added, growing more and more excited, "this junkyard doesn't have a dog. It has a giant mutant _beetle_!"

On cue, a gigantic beetle similar to the one Leonard had found in his gruel popped out of the junk pile and hissed at the humans; Jasmine, Harold, Zoey, Noah, and Leonard all gasped in shock.

"Hahaha, the guy's a bit of a _hoarder_ ," Chris laughed. "His estate is full of useful crud," the beetle was shown picking up a paintball gun and a sewing machine from the pile and casually tossing them away, "aaaand _disgusting_ crud." The beetle picked out a toilet next, and threw it at the humans with a hissing roar; Jasmine, Harold, Zoey, Noah, and Leonard quickly ducked, and it crashed to the ground behind them. "That is, if you can get near it," Chris told them with an impish smile. He turned towards the mountain and gave a thumbs-up, and Chef – now on top of the cliff – blew on an alphorn, shaking the area.

"It is _on_!" Chris declared, pumping his fist as intense challenge music started playing.

"Go! Go! Go!" Jasmine said, once again at the head of the pack as the campers started running.

/

The Rats' logo appeared in the corner as Cameron was shown struggling to pull himself up to a ledge. "Shirt so heavy," he whimpered, dropping down a little. "Socks, weighing me down!" He fell off completely, and the shot zoomed out to reveal that the ledge he'd tried to climb embarrassingly close to the ground.

"Come on, Cameron," Courtney called out to him while hanging from a dead tree that was jutting out of the rock. "If your muscles aren't enough, use that _brain_ of yours!" She swung herself up onto the branch, then jumped up from it to a higher ledge where she paused to catch her breath.

A few seconds later, Gwen hauled herself up onto the same ledge a little ways away. "Do you really think we're gonna win this way?" the goth asked her teammate.

"We'd _better_ ," Courtney replied with a hint of anger.

"Alright, just one step at a time," Jasmine coached as the shot cut to her and Zoey climbing the mountain, the Maggot's logo appearing in the corner of the screen. "Don't look down, just focus on finding the next hold."

"Wow," Zoey remarked as the two climbed up a few more steps, "you really sound like you know what you're doing. Do you climb mountains a lot?"

"Yeah, all the time!" Jasmine said. "Well, I mean, not _recently_ , but it's a skill that you don't really _forget_."

"Oh, cool!" Zoey said. "I'm glad we have someone like you around, it makes this kind of thing _way_ easier."

"Thanks," Jasmine told her before looking down and past her. "Now, where are the others?"

"Right here!" Trent called out to them, the shot cutting to him climbing another part of the mountain. "At least, I _think_ ," he added uncertainly, looking back down – the camera panned down to show Harold struggling a few steps behind. "Hey man, you alright down there?" Trent asked.

"I'm fine," Harold wheezed, climbing up to another ledge. "I'm just...pacing myself so I don't exhaust all my stamina."

Trent raised an eyebrow, then looked back up at Jasmine, who was now smiling. "I hear ya mate, good call!" she told him. "Just don't be afraid to holler if you need help, okay?"

"Got it!" Harold replied with a dopey, beaming grin.

The shot cut next to Lindsay, still on the ground looking at the cliff uncertainly. "And will the _lady_ be participating?" Chris asked in a mocking prim tone as he walked over.

"In a second," Lindsay replied. "I just did my nails so I'm trying to figure out if there's a way to climb with _out_ breaking them."

"I _see_ ," Chris said blankly. "What about you, man candy?" he asked, turning his head towards Justin – who was also still on the ground, looking up and rubbing his chin.

"Huh?" the model said, looking back at the host. "Oh, right, I just need a sec too." He smiled at the host's skeptical look, then grabbed Lindsay by the wrist and pulled her over. "Hey Lindsay, you'll stay by my side no matter what, right?" he asked her with a charming smile.

"Of _course_ , Justin," Lindsay answered dreamily, "always!"

"Good to hear," he told her before suddenly letting go, turning around, and pointing to his back. "Now hop on, I'll carry you up on my perfectly sculpted back." Lindsay blushed and giggled and hopped on.

The camera panned over to the right, where Leonard – also on the ground – was tapping his chin and narrowing his eyes as he looked off further to the right.

"Aaaand surprising _nobody_ , this isn't working," Noah said as he suddenly slid down the cliff behind the wizard.

"Friend," Leonard turned and told him, "I believe we're going to have to solve this conundrum with _out_ climbing."

"Gee, ya think?" Noah replied scathingly.

/

The background music became intense again as the scene cut back to Courtney and Gwen, the goth climbing on ahead while the ex-CIT lingered at a ledge with a few small, loose stones on it. She whistled over to them nonchalantly, then viciously kicked them off – they tumbled down the mountainside, catching Trent and Harold and knocking them off. The two boys narrowly missed hitting Justin and Lindsay, and landed with a groan back on the ground.

"Hey, what was _that_ about?" Gwen asked in shock as her teammate caught up to her.

"What?" Courtney replied in near offense. "They're on the other _team_ , knocking them down just gives the rest of _ours_ more time to catch up!" Gwen glowered at her, but she just ignored it and kept climbing.

Back down at the bottom, Cameron had joined up with Noah and Leonard, who were currently crouched behind a large rock near the junk pile.

"What are you two _doing_?" the bubble-boy asked.

"We await an opportunity to use _stealth_ to bypass the monster, and gain access to its horde of _treasure_ ," Leonard whispered dramatically.

"We're gonna try and sneak past the guard beetle and take its junk," Noah dryly translated, and the camera briefly panned over to show the mutant perched on its pile. It clacked its pincers and turned around, and the camera panned back to the three boys.

"The time is _now_ , fellows!" Leonard announced, standing up. "Charge!"

He was the only one to do so, and by the time he'd gotten to the edge of the pile the noise of his approach had gotten the beetle's attention and caused it to turn back around.

"So much for stealth," Noah quipped as he and Cameron watched on.

"S-stand aside, knave!" Leonard commanded, absentmindedly grabbing a recorder from the pile and brandishing it like a weapon.

It breathed a jet of fire at him, causing him to yelp and flee.

" _Seriously_?!" Noah exclaimed in disbelief as Leonard hastily rejoined him and Cameron. "I mean, _seriously_?! It breaths _fire_?!"

"I think we're gonna need some other way to distract it," Cameron said fearfully.

Leonard looked down at the recorder in his hands. "Perhaps _music_ can soothe this savage beast," he said, the challenge music fading out as he put the instrument to his lips and started to play.

It wasn't very good, and the beetle quickly made its displeasure known by breathing out another jet of fire, then curling up into a ball and rolling towards the three boys as the intense challenge music resumed. Leonard stopped playing as he, Cameron, and Noah scattered, with the balled-up beetle only following one of them.

"Why is it chasing _me_?!" Noah exclaimed as he ran from the mutant, Leonard and Cameron watching from the junk pile. " _Leonard's_ the one who played that awful racket!"

Trent and Harold were shown woozily getting back to their feet and looking over at their opponents. "C'mon, we gotta find something useful!" Cameron told Leonard as the two black boys frantically sifted through the junk pile.

"Check it," Harold told his teammate, "I think they have the right idea."

"You really think there's something in there that can help us?" Trent asked, following after as his nerdy teammate began to walk off to the right. The shot cut to the curled-up guard beetle bouncing up and down on a face-down Noah, then the camera panned left to show Cameron and Leonard pushing a waste barrel away from the pile and Harold and Trent running up to it.

"Totally," Harold told his teammate as they began to search as well, quickly tossing aside an old tire.

/

The shot cut to the top of the mountain, where Chef was waiting with several large blocks of ice. Jasmine was almost there, causing Chef to scowl – though he brightened up when his walkie talkie beeped. "You know what to do," Chris told him over it.

" _Ice 'em_ ," Chef replied with a dark grin.

"Alright," Jasmine said confidently, "looks like we're gonna score another one for Team Maggot!" The shot cut up to Chef, listening to the survivalist's climbing grunts as he held out an ice block with a vicious grin. He let it fall, and Jasmine looked up just in time to see it hit her. It knocked her off the cliff face, and she fell and knocked Zoey off as well. The two fell past Courtney, who watched in shock as they landed with a pained thud and groan.

She scowled upwards, and Chef was shown throwing more and more ice blocks down towards her. With a few quick yelping screams she dodged each one in turn. "I am _not_ going down, Chef!" she yelled angrily up at the man.

Chef snorted in contempt, then turned his gaze to the side – Gwen had just grabbed on to a thick pipe jutting out of the rock, and was pulling herself up from it to the next small ledge. She almost made it, too, but another ice block crashed down on the ledge just as she was about to grab it, forcing her to recoil with a yelp of fear. "Holy _crap_ that was close," she said in shock.

The shot cut to Justin and Lindsay, the blonde still on the model's back. "You doing okay there Lindsay?" Justin asked, his gaze focused on the cliff as he steadily climbed onward.

"Yeah," Lindsay answered as she looked back down at the ground, "but I'm not sure about the others. I think we're the only ones on our team that are still climbing." Justin looked back downward as well, and the shot cut down to the ground to show that Jasmine and Zoey had recovered enough to stand.

"Don't worry about us!" Jasmine called up to them. "Just keep moving!"

"I know," Justin said softly and irritably to himself, looking back up the cliff as the shot cut back to him.

xxx

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure Jasmine thinks she's, like, team _leader_ or something," the supermodel explained to the outhouse camera, "and I don't think I like that. 'Cause see, if the others get in _good_ with her and they form an alliance, then that means I might actually be in _trouble_. I think I'm gonna try and take control of the team from her when I get the chance."

xxx

Jasmine and Zoey joined up with Trent, who was watching Harold wind a long rope with a grappling hook attached to it around a short wooden rod with several other pieces of wood scattered around him.

"Can you get us all back up top with whatever it is you're building?" Jasmine asked hastily.

"Yes," Harold answered matter-of-factly, "but I'm still gonna need a few more parts from the pile."

The shot cut to Cameron and Leonard by the toxic waste barrel they'd grabbed as well as a ramshackle old couch and several other bits and bobs, the bubble-boy busy scratching calculations into the dirt. "So, what marvel of artifice are you working on?" Leonard asked.

"A rocket, basically," Cameron answered, not looking up from his equations. "But it won't matter if we can't get Noah away from the beetle."

Leonard looked up and to the side, where his teammate had been caught in a headlock by the guard mutant and was being punched in the face over and over by a boxing glove-wearing leg. "Any time you'd like to help, guys!" Noah called out in pained annoyance.

"Hmm," Leonard said, the shot cutting back to his close-up as he thought. "Of course!" he grinned in realization, snapping his fingers then reaching into the sleeves of his robe. "The solution to this puzzling predicament must lie in the bond _familiar_!" he declared, the camera zooming in on his hand as he revealed the much smaller mutant beetle he'd befriended earlier.

"Or the bond famili _al_ , as the case may be," he added slyly as the younger beetle hissed and screeched. This attracted the attention of the larger one, who promptly dropped Noah. He hit the ground with a groan.

A sweet and playful tune played as the smaller beetle jumped from Leonard's hand and scurried over to its parent, who picked it up with its forelegs, looked at it lovingly, and gave it a quick tap on the back so that it burped out a small jet of flame. Satisfied, the guard beetle scurried away and disappeared behind its horde.

"And thus the battle ends with everybody _happy_ ," Leonard remarked from in front of the pile, unaware of Jasmine, Trent, and Zoey hurriedly grabbing things from it behind him.

"I'm not!" Noah countered from off-screen.

/

The shot cut to a close-up of what looked like a makeshift grappling gun with the inner coil of rope still exposed. The Maggots' logo appeared in the top right corner of the screen as several pieces of metal, mostly springs, were dropped down around the contraption.

"There," Jasmine said, the shot zooming out to show her, Zoey, and Trent standing nervously around Harold. "That's what you needed, right?"

"Heck yeah," Harold smiled, picking up one of the springs and testing it with his fingers. "Great work, guys, this is totally _awesome_."

"Cool," Zoey said nervously, "but can you put it together in time?"

"Yeah, I think the Rats are almost done," Trent added, the shot briefly cutting to show Cameron, Leonard, and Noah struggling to lift the old couch.

Harold nodded, and the music turned tense again. The camera focused on his face as he stuck his tongue and started grabbing pieces just out-of-sight, and the footage quickly cycled between a few other shots – the Rat boys finally getting the couch into place on top of the waste barrel; Trent and Zoey and Jasmine's nervous looks; and finally Harold again who grinned as the music peaked and wiped the sweat from his brow.

"Done!" he announced, holding up his finished, and rather bulky, grappling gun. "Here, I'll let _you_ have the honors," he added, tossing his mostly-wooden creation to Jasmine.

"Score," she said with a confident smirk, quickly aiming the gun up at the top of the cliff and firing; the recoil was enough to nearly send her off-balance. "Wow, it's got quite the kick," she smiled, looking at the gun.

The shot briefly cut to the top of the mountain, where Courtney had just about finished her climb. The grappling hook suddenly shot past, startling her.

"Okay," Jasmine said as the shot cut back to the Maggots on the ground, the gun's rope still moving, "so how-" She was cut off when she felt Harold suddenly latch onto her, and though she scowled at him he ignored it.

"Quick!" the dweeb declared. "Grab on before it starts retracting!"

"Huh?" Jasmine said in confusion before the grappling rope suddenly became taut. Trent and Zoey were only just able to grab onto Jasmine as the gun's box started to whir, and with a startled scream the four of them were pulled into the air at high speed.

They zoomed past Justin and Lindsay, and the camera zoomed in on the model as he yelped and shifted to the side to dodge. "Hey, you could've _hit_ me!" he called out in annoyance. "Right, Lindsay?" he asked, looking back at his companion...who, as the camera zooming back out revealed, was no longer on his back. A familiar shriek caused him to turn his shocked look upwards again, the camera following suit to show that Lindsay had somehow latched onto Zoey as she and the others went by.

The extra weight didn't seem to be slowing the Maggots down, however, as they continued to fly upward. Courtney managed to haul herself up to the flat mountaintop just as their momentum shot them up past her and into the air, the grappling hook becoming unhooked from the rock next to her. Chef, who had been about to throw another ice block down, gaped in shock just before the five Maggots landed on him.

"Looks like we made it," Jasmine said weakly to the teammates piled on top of her, who groaned out a cheer.

"Umm, don't think you've _won_ yet," Courtney interrupted. "We have to get our whole _team_ up, remember? You're still missing a member, and the rest of _my_ team should be up momentarily!"

The five Maggots immediately looked towards the edge of the cliff, just as Gwen pulled herself up top. "You better be right, Courtney," she told the other girl, "because I'm pretty sure Justin's coming up _fast_."

Dread filled Courtney's face as she hurried back to the edge of the cliff and looked down, the camera quick-panning down to Justin as he silently but determinedly climbed up. Back up top his five teammates quickly got themselves back upright, and rushed to the side to cheer him on.

"C'mon, guys!" Gwen countered, standing between them and Courtney and calling down the mountain as well. "You can do it!"

"Yeah, get a move on!" Courtney added angrily and the camera quick-panned back down once again, this time stopping at Cameron, Noah, and Leonard. Several bottles and bags and electronic bits had been tied to the waste barrel, with two long wires leading out from them.

"Okay, we should be ready to launch," Cameron said, climbing onto the couch and grabbing the uninsulated ends of the two wires.

"Yes, but into _what_ ," Noah said anxiously as he and Leonard climbed onto the couch as well.

"Here goes!" Cameron said, touching the two wires together. The whole apparatus shook for a second, then the couch took off quite like a rocket – suddenly, and with a bit of fire coming out of the bottom.

The three boys screamed, and their couch soon caught up to a wide-eyed Justin...who quickly turned around and grabbed onto it as it passed. It reached the top soon afterward with all four boys screaming for their lives, rocketing past the edge of the cliff and the shocked faces of their teammates.

"Catch me, girls!" Justin said, dropping away from the couch first. Zoey and Lindsay quickly backed up a few steps with their arms wide, catching Justin but falling back onto the rock in the process. "Thanks, girls, that could've done some _serious_ damage!" Justin told the two groaning young women.

xxx

"Man, grabbing onto the couch like that was some really quick thinking," Justin said in awe. He turned his eyes upward and tapped the side of his head with a couple fingers, adding "Good job, brain, looks like being out here has really brought out the best in you!"

xxx

The challenge footage resumed with a shot of Chef holding his head and groaning in pain as he stood back up...only for the couch carrying Leonard, Cameron, and Noah to land on top of him as well.

"Did we make it?" Leonard asked as he and the other boys disembarked and ran over to rejoin their teammates.

A rather annoyed-looking Courtney opened her mouth to respond, but was cut-off by the sudden appearance of Chris McLean. The host was hovering in the air a few yards away with his jetpack, and sported a wide grin.

"Sorry Leonard, but thanks to Harold and Justin the Maggots _win_!" he announced, earning a triumphant cheer from the six winners and a groan from the losers.

"Great, _another_ loss!" Courtney raged. "Can't this team do anything _right_?!"

"Well it's not like _you've_ been doing much to help us win," Gwen shot at her.

Courtney gasped in outrage. "I was the first one _up_ here! It's not _my_ fault we lost, it was the _boys_ for being too _slow_!"

"Yeah, because Justin _totally_ wouldn't have grabbed on if they'd come up sooner," Gwen countered sarcastically.

Courtney growled angrily, but Cameron quickly put himself between her and Gwen. "Please, stop fighting!" he told them.

Before any of them could react, Chris landed between them and the camera. "Will the Rats keep it together?" he asked. "Or will they all go tumbling down? Find out, after the break."

(Fade to Commercial and Back)

The episode resumed on a shot of a large patch of ice and snow, a snow machine blowing in the background next to a snowy slope. The camera panned left onto the two shivering teams, with Zoey and Noah clinging to their respective team flags.

"Greetings, ice teens!" Chris greeted as he and Chef rode up on the back of a snowmobile wearing thick parkas. "Cold enough for ya?" He chuckled as the shot cut in closer and panned back across the freezing campers, Chris adding "I'll take that as a yes," when it reached the end of the line.

"Time for part two of today's challenge!" the host announced. "' _Capture_ the _Snow Fort_.' To win, you either have to demo the _enemy's_ fort," he directed their attention to his left, the shot cutting over to a rather poorly constructed snow castle, "or capture their flag and bring it back to you own fort." He directed their attention in the opposite direction, to a much nicer-looking snow fortress. "Maggots won the first part, so they get first dibs on the forts," Chris explained.

"The c-c-castle looks nicer," Zoey opened as the camera zoomed in on the Maggots, five of them looking at each other while Jasmine continued to look over them from one fort to the other.

"True," Justin shivered. "Oh, but what if it's like a trick or something?" he suggested, Lindsay quickly nodding her agreement. "It could really be _terrible_ inside," Justin added.

"I wouldn't put it past Chris to pull something like that," Trent said warily.

"What do you think, Jasmine?" Harold asked the team's tallest member, who was now looking firmly in the direction of the better-looking fort.

"Nah, even _if_ there's something bad inside the outer walls still look way more stable," she said. "We'll take the castle," she announced, dashing off to the right without further discussion and forcing her shivering teammates to follow nervously.

/

A clock wipe transitioned the scene to inside the Maggots' new fort, a pleasant tune playing as it was shown to be just as nice-looking on the inside, if rather bare. Aside from the campers and their flag, all that was inside was a pile of snowballs and a shovel stuck into the ground.

"See, what'd I tell ya?" Jasmine told her smiling teammates.

xxx

"What can I say, I know a thing or two about building shelters," Jasmine told the outhouse camera. "I'd hate to be the Rats right now, though, that shack looked _dreadful_."

xxx

The scene cut to the fort in question, which was just as ugly on the inside as it was out. It was as bare otherwise as the Maggots' castle, though, with only a shovel and pile of snowballs.

"Wow, it's almost as depressing as our chances of winning!" Noah said dryly as he and his teammates looked around in disappointment.

"Well...that doesn't mean the rest of you shouldn't gonna try your hardest," Courtney said with a hint of forced positivity.

"Oh? And where does that leave _you_?" Gwen asked with a hint of bitterness.

"Trying as hard as I can like _always_ ," Courtney replied in annoyance, causing Cameron to look between the two girls, pinch the bridge of his nose, and groan.

/

"Listen up, players," Chris called over a megaphone as the scene cut to Chef carrying a lawn chair past a blazing fire pit. The host was already seated in a chair of his own, and his assistant soon joined him. "Here's how it works! Use the shovel in each fort to fire your collection of Mystery Snowballs," the eyes of the five Rats immediately turned to their imbedded shovel, and Cameron tentatively reached out and touched the handle, "which you can fire at each other's forts."

"Fascinating," he said to himself as he drew the shovel's handle back an inch and released it with a twang.

"Why are they called Mystery Balls?" Zoey called out from the Maggots' castle while Jasmine tested how stable their shovel was.

"Because they all inflict major damage!" Chris answered. "Thanks to the _secret weapon_ hidden inside each ball." The Maggots were shown looking at their pile of snowballs, the shot zooming in as one of them made an odd noise and shook. "Some, will damage _you_ ," the host added, "so choose _wisely_."

"Each team _has_ to elect a Captain to command, and conquer," Chris continued. "Starting... _now_!"

"I volunteer for Team Captain," Jasmine immediately said back at the Maggots' base. "Any objections?"

"None here," Harold said with a smile.

"Sounds good to me," Zoey added shortly after.

"I'm cool with it," Trent finished

"Good," Jasmine nodded. "So in that case, me, Justin, and Trent will go grab the Rats' flag. Zoey, Lindsay, and Harold, you stay back and guard ours."

It was then that Justin cleared his throat, gaining the attention of his teammates. "Actually," he said, "I was thinking that maybe we should keep some of the muscle back _here_ in case we need it to fight off the Rats. Plus," he smiled and chuckled in a light but attractive manner, "I don't think _anybody_ wants to risk me slipping on the ice and bruising my beautiful face."

The camera zoomed in on his face as his smile gleamed and his skin sparkled, and Jasmine was shown staring dreamily and saying "Yeah..."

"What if I stay back with Lindsay and Zoey, and Harold goes with you and Trent?" Justin suggested.

Jasmine shook away the dreaminess and smirked. "Not a bad idea," she said. "Let's do that then. Okay team," she said, putting her hand into the middle of their group; the others quickly followed suit. "Let's do this!" Jasmine finished, leading the break as the others cheered. She, Trent, and Harold ran off out of the castle, leaving Zoey, Lindsay, and Justin behind.

The supermodel grinned.

xxx

"Now that I have the girls alone, it's time to work my magic," Justin confidently confessed. "Getting Zoey into an alliance should be a piece of low-fat, low-carb _cake_."

xxx

"Hey, I was thinking," Justin told the girls as they turned their attention to the shovel and snowball pile. "It's only a matter of time before we lose, so how about the three of us form an alliance to protect each other?"

"Ooh, I'd _love_ to Justin!" Lindsay squealed, dropping the snowball she'd picked up an ignoring the cloud of smoke it burst into.

"Wow, uh, I don't know what to _say_ ," Zoey said, looking at him and rubbing her arm uncertainly. "Who'd you wanna vote for if we lose?"

"I'm thinking _Harold_ ," Justin told her.

"Whoa, really?" Zoey asked in shock. "Why him?"

"He's weird and kind of a _flake_ , y'know?" Justin explained, idly leaning on their shovel. "He doesn't really fit the team's _image_."

"But...but Harold's my _friend_...kind of...," Zoey said, becoming more uncertain as Justin chuckled and walked toward her.

"C'mon, Zoey," the supermodel said, "don't you wanna be friends with _me_?" He drew closer to her as he spoke, grabbing her hand in both of his and getting almost face to face while Lindsay watched blankly in the background.

Zoey just made a sort of shuddering, overwhelmed noise and took a step back.

xxx

"I used to think the guys back home were gorgeous," Zoey confessed anxiously, "even _if_ they're all just hockey thugs and juvie rejects. But Justin's hotter than all of them _combined_ , _and_ he's a professional supermodel. Harold's smart and we have a lot in common, but he can't really compete with _that_. But...can I just _abandon_ him?"

xxx

"Well obviously _I'm_ gonna be Team Captain," Courtney declared with a smug matter-of-factness as the footage cut to her and the Rats.

"Really?" Gwen countered with a glower. "Because if you are, _I'm_ rebelling." Courtney gasped indignantly.

"Well, you don't exactly have a good track record," Noah pointed out, Leonard nodding his agreement.

"I have a _great_ track record!" Courtney objected before looking down in embarrassment. "Just...maybe not here...but-"

"I'm sorry, Courtney," Cameron told her, putting a hand on her shoulder, "but I have to agree with them. Right now, we need a leader who we can _all_ accept. And to that end, I'd like to nominate _myself_."

The brows of his teammates shot up in surprise. "Wow, Cameron, I didn't peg you for the type," Gwen said. "But if you think you're up to it..."

Cameron gulped nervously, but nodded just the same. "I am."

"Okay then," Gwen smiled. "What do _you_ think?" she asked Courtney with an almost pointed tone.

"I... _suppose_...," Courtney conceded. "But only because I trust in Cameron's _smarts_."

"What about you guys?" Cameron asked Noah and Leonard.

"Meh," Noah shrugged, "I won't object."

"And so, the mantle of leadership has been handed down," Leonard declared with a dramatic flourish. "What are your orders, oh Captain?" he asked with a bow.

"I was thinking that Noah, Leonard, and I stay back to defend while Courtney and Gwen go on offense," Cameron said.

" _What_?!" the two girls exclaimed at once.

"I know it seems _odd_ ," the bubble-boy conceded, "but if we ever want to win a challenge then the two of you are gonna have to learn to work _together_. The three of us," he motioned to himself, Leonard, and Noah, "can already do that, and with our combined intellect we should be able to make the best use of the shovel."

"Well...," Courtney said uncertainly.

"Aaand, _GO_!" Chris suddenly called from off-screen.

"There goes our choice," Gwen muttered in resignation. "Let's go, Bossypants," she said, grabbing Courtney by the wrist and running out of the snow shack.

/

The scene flashed outside as Gwen and Courtney ran out on to the ice, low but tense challenge music welling up in the background. "You'd better not mess this up," Courtney shot to her unwilling partner.

"Would you _stop it_ with that?" Gwen shot back.

The shot cut up to the bright and sizzling sun, then down to Chef and Chris – who had changed back into their normal clothing, with the addition of a straw hat for Chef. Both were drinking some kind of coconut drink. "Hurry up," Chris warned the unseen campers, "my ice is melting! And your forts will too if the sun gets much higher!"

"So, how are we gonna do this?" Gwen asked tersely as the shot cut back to her and Courtney racing along the ice.

"Well _first_ ," Courtney said, "we should-whoaaah!" She suddenly slipped on the ice and quickly grabbed Gwen's arm for balance, but only succeeded in knocking the goth off-balance as well; the two girls continued to slide forward on their butts.

The camera quick-panned back to the snow shack, where Noah was watching out of the misshapen window-like entrance, one eyebrow raised as he watched his teammates. "Well, _that_ happened sooner than I expected," he said to himself, turning around and heading back into the center of the fort.

"What was that?" Cameron asked as the shot cut inside, showing him adjusting the Rats' shovel.

"Nothing," Noah said. "You finish calibrating that thing yet, Noble Leader?"

"Yup," Cameron said.

"And _I_ have selected the first round of ammunition from our _mysterious_ _stockpile_ ," Leonard announced, walking over with a decently-sized snowball. "Using what few divination spells remain unaffected by this island's toxic _energies_ , of course."

"Great," Noah said in an almost pleasant and not-quite-mocking tone, "load her up."

xxx

Noah gave the outhouse camera a bored shrug. "Hey, if letting him think he's more useful than he really is makes him more _bearable_ to be around, then why spoil it?"

xxx

Dramatic music resumed as the scene cut to Jasmine racing across the ice at top speed, Trent and Harold following a little ways behind her. She blew past Gwen and Courtney, the two girls still sliding forward on their butts, and Trent and Harold soon ran by them as well.

"Wait, what?" Trent said in confusion as he noticed the goth, sliding to a halt as he looked back in the direction they'd gone. Harold, his eyes clenched shut as he yelled out a battlecry, slammed into the musician from behind, toppling both. The ice beneath them began to crack, and soon broke entirely plunging the two boys into frigid water. They promptly bobbed back to the surface, clutching each other in fear but frozen in a block of ice.

Chef started cackling hysterically, and the shot cut back to him and Chris watching from the sidelines. "Forgot to tell ya!" the host called out. "No Man's Land is more like No Man's _Water_!"

"What?!" Jasmine said in shock, looking back and sliding to a stop. "Oh no, not now!" she said, turning back and running towards her frozen teammates. A sudden snowball flew into her right shoulder from behind, causing the goliath young woman to stumble and grunt in pain but continue forward nonetheless.

"Direct hit, Captain!" Noah called back into the Rats' fort as the shot cut to him looking out its window again. Inside, Cameron and Leonard cheered.

The shot cut back to Gwen and Courtney as they finally stopped sliding and quickly scrambled back onto their feet. "Jeez, I hope Trent's okay," Gwen commented, looking back with concern as she and Courtney started running forward.

"Would you stop letting him distract you and worry about _us_ right now?" Courtney scolded as a snowball sailed right over there heads, forcing both to quickly duck. "We're kind of in the middle of something here!"

"Okay, okay!" Gwen replied with a hint of franticness as yet another snowball sailed past them.

/

"I think we need to aim _higher_!" Zoey called out as the shot returned to the Maggots' castle, the redhead looking out their front gate. "With Harold and Trent frozen I think we should try to hit the Rats' shack!"

"So we need a little more _force_ , eh?" Justin smirked as the camera panned to him bending the shovel back as Lindsay cautiously loaded a snowball into the loop of the handle. The model let it go, and the snowball was launched into the air with a twang. The camera followed it over the castle wall, then zoomed out to show it flying over No Man's Land – Courtney and Gwen still racing towards the Maggots' base; Jasmine trying to haul her frozen teammates out of the water. The snowball struck a part of the Rat shack that may have been a misshapen tower, causing part of it to crumble down.

"Direct hit!" Zoey announced with cheer from the Maggots' base.

"Great work Zoey," Justin told her with a smile. "Now let's keep 'em coming!"

"Roger!" Lindsay said chipperly, picking up another snowball off their pile.

/

"C'mon, c'mon," Jasmine said as she more firmly grabbed the block of ice her teammates were in and started to lift it. The shot briefly cut to Cameron and Leonard firing off another snowball, and then Justin doing the same, before returning to Jasmine as she managed to get her iced companions out of the water. With snowballs flying through the air she looked around, then bit her lip nervously. "I don't think I have time to get you out," she told them, "but I can't just _leave_ you here...I'll have to bring you with me," she said decisively, getting on the other side of the ice block and giving it a mighty push so it slid towards the Rats' fort.

/

The shot cut back to the Rat boys again, all three working together to load a particularly big snowball onto their shovel before an even bigger one landed on the snow next to them...and burst open to reveal the junkyard guard beetle. It hissed menacingly at them, causing Cameron and Noah to scream and duck behind Leonard.

"Whoa there, big guy," Noah told the beetle, "you don't wanna hurt the one who babysat your kid, right?" The camera focused on Leonard, who smiled politely and waved at the beetle.

The larger one paused, and its tiny child hopped out onto its head and waved back at Leonard as a sweet tune played.

" _We're_ not your enemies," Noah told it quickly, " _they_ are!" The scene cut back outside as he pointed out the window towards the Maggots' base, and the angry beetle hopped out next to him and scurried back along the ice.

Noah wiped his brow in relief and moved back inside. "Okay boys," he told Cameron and Leonard, "time to get launching again. Isn't that right, _Captain_?" he looked at the bubble-boy, who's eyes briefly widened in recollection.

"Right," Cameron said as he dashed back to their shovel, "everyone to your stations!" Leonard and Noah quickly complied, the former returning to the snowball pile while the latter took up his lookout spot.

/

A flash moved the camera to a position looking in on the Maggots' base from the wide front entrance, Lindsay and Justin and Zoey focused on loading and drawing back another shot inside. A pan to the left showed Courtney peaking inside, then leaning back flush against the outer wall next to Gwen.

" _Crap_ ," the former CIT muttered, "I forgot how _hot_ Justin is. The girls are easy enough to deal with, but I don't know if I can bring myself to hurt _him_. Let's just help the boys tear down the fort."

"Oh?" Gwen whispered. " _You're_ getting distracted by a boy now? I thought you were too _aloof_ to care about your enemies."

"I...th...that's _different_ ," Courtney spluttered.

"Really?" Gwen asked. "Because here I thought it was yet another example of _you_ being full of it. Seriously, I can't so much as _smile_ at Trent without you yelling at me, but you can just change our plan on a whim because you don't wanna have to fight the really _hot_ guy?"

Courtney made an indignant sound, but Gwen cut her off. " _No_ , Courtney," the goth said. "I'm sick of you acting like you're so much _better_ than the rest of the team, and I know the guys are too. So why don't you _stop_ acting like Little Miss Perfect for once and admit that you have flaws too."

Courtney stared blankly for a second, then scowled and growled in frustration. "Okay, _fine_ ," she hissed, fists clenched. "I admit it, I haven't done as well in challenges as I thought I would. And I'll stop getting on your case about Trent, too, okay?"

"Okay," Gwen smiled, slyly adding "And luckily for us, _I_ have a plan to get around Justin..." She leaned in to whisper into her teammate's ear, and the former CIT's face quickly lit up.

/

A tense note as the scene cut back to Jasmine and her ice-trapped teammates heralded the start of a tenser, more fast-paced challenge tune. She gave the giant block another heave to send it further along the ice towards the Rats' base only for the giant guard beetle to scuttle up, intercept it, and shove it back her way.

"No...," she gasped, quickly holding her arms out to stop it from running her down. She slid back a few feet as she slowed it to a stop, then gasped again as the beetle jumped on top of it with a menacing hiss. "Not _you_ again!" she said, her frustration quickly turning to fear as she ducked and rolled out of the way of a jet of fire. The camera zoomed in on the corner of the ice block that had gotten caught in the blast, and Jasmine smirked when she saw it had been melted.

"You call that a _flame_ , mate?" she taunted. The beetle screeched and turned towards her, but rather than unleashing another jet of fire it simply pounced on her. "This wasn't supposed to happen!" Jasmine cried out as she was pinned to the ice and began wrestling with the guard beetle.

/

The fast-paced challenge music kept going even as the scene flashed back to the Maggots' base and Courtney suddenly ran in screaming at the top of her lungs, knocking over Zoey who had been keeping watch just inside the entrance.

"Quick, guard the flag!" the indie girl called back to her teammates before scrambling to her feet as well.

Lindsay and Justin managed to get in front of the flag before Courtney reached them, but with a sharp cry of "Hi- _ya_!" the CIT knocked the blonde to the ground with a brutal flying kick to the stomach. She reached for the flag, but Justin quickly grabbed her by the wrist.

"C'mon now, Courtney," he told his captive in a calm, soothing voice, "don't do this. Just looking into my eyes and tell me what you _really_ wanna do right now..." His dreamy, shimmering leitmotif abruptly replaced the challenge music as the camera zoomed in on his beautiful face and shining smile, and Courtney sighed in adoration.

The shot cut back to his close-up as he winked handsomely...and a sudden snowball crashed into him, bringing the intensely-paced challenge back as though it had never been interrupted. "Aah! My beautiful _face_!" he screamed in pain.

Courtney quickly shook away her lust and looked to the side, the camera following suit to reveal Gwen standing confidently on the Maggots' snowball pile, idly tossing one of them in her hand. "Yeah, Courtney, tell us," she smirked, "what _do_ you wanna do right now?"

Courtney grinned darkly. "I wanna _win_!" she declared, kneeing Justin between the legs, then shoving him to the side with one hand and grabbing the Maggots' flag.

"No!" Zoey cried out, running towards the CIT to intercept but only receiving a snowball to the face for her trouble. She gasped in pain as she hit the ground, and Gwen and Courtney laughed giddily as they ran out.

/

The footage skipped ahead to show the two Rat girls racing along the ice. The camera panned ahead of them to Jasmine, who had gotten the giant beetle in a headlock and was now forcing it to breath fire on the frozen Harold and Trent – already their heads and shoulders has been freed, but their faces were still unmoving.

"You lose, Maggot!" Courtney taunted as she and Gwen approached, earning a gasp from Jasmine.

"NO!" she cried out, quickly letting go with one hand to reach for the former CIT's legs – only to get a snowball upside the head from the Rats' base. "Aagh!" she winced in pain, moving her free hand to where she'd been hit and in doing so missing her chance to trip Courtney.

"Woo hoo!" Gwen cheered, and the shot cut to the ice shack window as Noah and Cameron laughed and high-fived.

In one swift motion Jasmine slammed the mutant beetle to the ground and stood back up, then chased after her foes with a determined scowl. The camera jumped outwards to show her slowly catching up to them, but it was too late – the music leveled off triumphantly as Courtney and Gwen dove into their base with the Maggots' flag.

" _Safe_! In your _face_!" Courtney declared, slamming the captured flag into the ground then turning around to taunt Jasmine as she fell to her knees and slid all the way up to the raised ledge of the shack's window-entrance.

" _No_...," she groaned in defeat.

"Rats _win_!" Chris declared as he and Chef arrived outside, both back in their winter wear and Chef holding a tray of several steaming mugs. The five winning campers headed outside with smiles on their faces.

"And here's your reward," the host added, motioning to the tray in his smiling assistant's hands. "McLean Brand Hot Chocolate", he said as a game show jingle played, "scald your _senses_ with chocolatey goodness."

The Rats cheered, and Jasmine groaned and pounded the side of the ice shack in sadness and frustration, cracking part of it. The shot cut to the half-melted ice block and Trent and Harold finally stirred. "What _happened_?" the musician said in a daze

"Did we win?" the dweeb added a moment later.

"Aww, I can't believe we _lost_!" Lindsay lamented as the shot cut to her giving Zoey a hand back up. "Oh well...at least we know who's going _home_ , right?" she asked, looking back at Justin.

"Absolutely," Justin remarked, inspecting his face in a mirror – surprisingly, it didn't appear to have changed much after getting hit. "At least, as long as Zoey's still with us," he added, lowering the mirror and flashing a handsome smile at the redhead.

"R-right..." Zoey answered nervously.

/

The footage skipped ahead to the four of the five Rats relaxing on the steps of their cabin, with Courtney standing before them.

"Look," she told them all nervously, "I know I've been a little... _hard_ on everyone lately, so I just wanted to say that...I'm sorry. You have my word that I'll be more considerate from now on."

"Wow, it's great to hear that Courtney!" Cameron said happily.

"Yeah," Noah chimed in with a dry smirk, "I guess we can all just do whatever we want from now on!"

"Don't push it," Courtney glowered. "I still expect everyone to do their best so we can keep _winning_ , I'm just not gonna be as harsh about it."

"Well, I think we can accept that," Gwen said, smiling as she stood up. "As long as you keep that promise, anyway," she added slyly before turning and heading back into the girls' side of the Rats' cabin.

"Haha, yeah," Courtney laughed anxiously.

xxx

"Okay, so I'll concede that Gwen is _far_ more competent than I gave her credit for," Courtney told the outhouse camera, "but that doesn't mean I'm just gonna stop being critical of our team's _many_ weaknesses. I'm just not gonna _say_ anything about them, at least not until I'm safe from the vote again. So for now, I'll let Gwen try to hook up with Trent. But this _isn't_ over," she finished with a stern glare.

xxx

"Do I believe that Courtney's really changed her ways?" Noah asked the confession camera in a bored tone. " _No_. But I'm not about to pass up an opportunity to either mess with her a bit, or make use of that tea kettle full of _rage_ she's gonna have boiling up inside her."

xxx

The footage skipped ahead again, now showing dusk over the communal bathrooms as Justin sauntered towards them. Jasmine emerged right as the model reached the door, eliciting a "Whoa!" from both as they stepped back before they ran into one another.

"Sorry about that mate," Jasmine said, "I'll just be on my way."

She moved to pass around him, but Justin held out an arm to stop her. "Wait," he said, "I wanna talk to you."

"Really?" Jasmine questioned. "What's on your mind."

"The vote," Justin answered. "I was thinking we should get rid of _Harold_ , you in?"

Jasmine raised her brow in confusion. "Harold? Why him?"

"A lot of reasons," Justin chuckled a bit before turning serious again, "but mostly because he screwed you up in the second part of the challenge. If he hadn't caused him and Trent to get frozen, then you probably would've been able to steal the Rats' flag no problem."

"Well I guess that makes sense," Jasmine admitted uncertainly. "But Harold's a friend, and his smarts are what got us to the top of the cliff. I don't know if we can really afford to eliminate him."

Justin tutted and shook his head, ending with a flip of his luxurious hair that got an adoring sigh from Jasmine. "Trust me, Jasmine, between the two of _us_ we don't need his brains! So please," he lightly grabbed onto her upper arms and looked into her eyes, "vote him out. For me?" He batted his eyelashes a single time, then smiled; Jasmine shuddered and gave a small but pleasured moan.

xxx

"I'm pretty sure it's gonna be Justin that goes home tonight," Harold confessed in the outhouse. "Why, you ask? Simple: because he _volunteered_ to defend the flag, and then _failed_ to defend the flag. It stands to reason from that alone that he's nothing more than an incredibly attractive face, and that his looks aren't even that useful to the team. He's the _obvious_ choice to go home. I haven't talked to the girls about this yet, but I'm confident that they've already come to the same conclusions," he nodded.

xxx

The usual low, plodding elimination music began to play as the scene cut to a shot of the island at night, the camera zooming in then cutting to the six Mutant Maggots at the campfire pit – Trent and Harold together on the left side of the front row with blankets around their shoulders; Jasmine and Zoey on the right with a gap between them and the boys; and Lindsay and Justin sitting coolly in the back.

"Team Maggot, welcome to your _first_ elimination ceremony," Chris began as Chef walked up in his hazmat suit carrying the box containing the Toxic Marshmallow. "And I gotta say, this tension is giving me _chills_!" The shot cut in close to the boys who'd been frozen as they glared. "I can see _Justin_ is staying cool despite the loss. No worries from him!"

The model shrugged and smirked. "Worrying gives me wrinkles, so I don't bother," he explained.

"And it looks like Jasmine and Zoey appear to have _frozen up_ ," Chris added with an almost taunting tone as the shot cut to the girls, who promptly stiffened and looked down. "Wonder why," the host laughed.

"The following players are safe," Chris said, holding up the first marshmallow from his own platter as a deep note struck. " _Trent_."

The musician caught his prize with a smile, and shared a happy look with Harold.

" _Jasmine_." The survivalist raised her head and caught her marshmallow with a frown.

" _Lindsay_ ," the host continued, the blonde clapping in delight before getting him in the forehead with her treat.

"And _Zoey_ ," Chris finished, the redhead seeming almost shocked as she caught her marshmallow in open hands.

"Which leaves, Harold and Justin," Chris announced, the shot pulling back to show the dweeb gulping nervously and the model sitting up straighter. "And the loser is...," he said with an impish smile, pausing for effect as the music picked up. The camera alternated between close-ups of Harold and Justin, the latter still not looking at all concerned, until finally...

" _Harold_."

"You two voted for me?!" Harold said, standing up in outrage and looking at Jasmine and Zoey; the girls looked too ashamed to meet his gaze. "I see how it is," the nerd said, crossing his arms and drawing the blanket around him like a cape. "I have never felt so betrayed in my life. Chef," he turned to the two adults, "I'm ready. Give me the Toxic Marshmallow of Loserdom."

Chris and Chef looked at one another and shared a mischievous smile, and the hulking man walked forward with his strongbox still shut tight. He presented it to Harold, who cringed in anticipation as it was slowly opened...revealing nothing inside.

"What?" Harold said in confusion.

"Hah!" Chris laughed. "Yeah, we're changing things up and having _tonight's_ eliminated Maggot become _tomorrow's_ new Rat."

"So, I'm not taking the Hurl of Shame?" Harold asked.

"Nope," Chris answered with a smug grin.

"Boo-ya," Harold said, pumping his fist in celebration.

"From now on, you and the people who just voted you out will be on opposing teams," the host added.

" _Awesome_ ," the dweeb nodded confidently. "On my honor I will not let this second chance go to waste," he added, bowing deeply and dramatically.

"Whatever," Chris said, rolling his eyes. "Kinda disappointing no one's going for a catapult ride, though." He looked over at Chef, who'd returned to his side and taken off his protective helmet.

"No way, I already did that," Chef said, shaking his head. "Why don'tcha Hurl one of the _interns_."

Chris looked thoughtful for a second, then shrugged. "Might as well," he said.

/

The shot cut to Chris standing by the Hurl of Shame, a short and chubby east Asian male intern sitting nervously in the catapult's bucket, an inflatable duck-shaped inner tube around his waist.

The duck-shaped float suddenly deflated, startling the intern. "Uh, Mr. McLean? I-" he tried to say, interrupted by Chris pulling the lever and launching him screaming into the night sky.

Chris sighed and shook his head in disappointment. "It just isn't the same," he remarked before taking a deep breath and turning to face the camera the series' capstone theme began to play. "Come back for more mutants, mayhem, and manipulation," he said excitedly, "next time, on Total! Drama! Revenge, of the Island!"

(Fade to Credits)

* * *

 **Author's Note - Post Script**

Yup, no elimination this week. Why, you ask? Well, it's kind of a long story, and I can't explain everything right now, but I'll say what I can.

See, for obvious reasons, I wanted the Maggots to lose this week. And early on, it was going to be a proper elimination as well. But then the more I thought about it, the more I realized that I wanted the person who would've been eliminated to last a bit longer. There was also the problem of next week's episode - I was still planning on having Harold be swapped then in a similar way as he was here, but between what the original elimination plan was for this week and something that is gonna happen next week, I realized it wouldn't make much sense for Harold to get the swap.

So I was left with no good choice for a Maggot elimination this week, and a person whom I wanted to swap but which wouldn't work next week. The solution quickly became obvious: bump up the Harold swap, and re-order the other eliminations a bit to fit what I wanted and needed. And since I obviously wasn't gonna have Izzy show up and become an intern, this meant I still had a nice little surprise at the end for you all.

Naturally, this means that next week somebody _will_ be going home. So look forward to it.

The only thing I have left to say is that **_fans of my others series, Total Drama Rebirth, should expect it to be updated either tomorrow or Monday._**

Other than that, see you back in the Shuffledverse next week!

\- Fangren

* * *

 **Appendix: TSROTI Eliminated Contestants**

Cody - (13th Place)

Izzy - (12th Place | Still on the loose...?)


	4. Chapter 4 - Finders Creepers

**Author's Note**

Well folks, here we are again. It's kind of hard to think of it this way, but this episode makes the end of the first third of the story, more or less - first three boots and a swap; with the next four episodes as the middle third, and the merge up to the finale as the last third.

But hey, that's what happens with a thirteen episode season. Anyway, on to the reviews!

 **TD is awesome:** Thanks, and as I explained in the Post Script last week I decided to move the swap up because I felt it wouldn't work as well in this week's chapter for reasons that hopefully will be more apparent by the time you finish reading it.

 **Gage the hedgehog:** Thanks as always!

 **DSX62415:** Hmm, interesting point, and we'll see how things turn out for Justin. And again, I hope you're able to find a solution to your computer woes soon.

 **Glowing Insanity:** Thanks, I'm glad you enjoyed Courtney and Gwen's dynamic last week - hopefully I can keep it up as they continue on in the competition. And yeah, it certainly seems like Justin is doing better as a villain so far than in canon TDA...

 **P. T. Piranha:** Mmm, well, I do try and foreshadow most eliminations to at least some extent, just so they aren't completely out of left field. And yeah, these past few episodes have been really character-focused rather than challenge focused, which I've been enjoying fairly well.

 **Sarcasm is a Habit:** Glad you're enjoying the development, even with Harold and Leonard! It's always nice to hear that people like how I portray certain characters even if they don't like those same characters in general. Hopefully the plans I have for this cast won't ruin anybody's opinions of them, though...

 **Call Me Ishmael:** Glad I was able to surprise you then! And interesting thoughts on the cast, too...

 **acosta perez jose ramiro:** Thanks as always, and yeah, Justin certainly got lucky with the team composition.

 **Animation Adventures:** Thank you, thank you. Looks like I'm doing well with Justin and Leonard and especially Courtney, then. Honestly, her getting laid into like that just seemed like such an obvious thing to do; this version of Gwen just isn't the type to put up with Courtney for long, especially in the middle of a challenge. And as for Harold's grappling gun, I came up with the idea when I saw how Zoey ended up using the hook to climb up in cannon, and figured a high-powered gun was something that both could get the Maggots to the top quickly and could conceivably be built by Harold.

 **moka evans:** Haha, I'm glad you enjoyed Courtney's little development last week. She's really not the type to admit she's in the wrong or at fault very easily, and really only did so here because it was very apparent that the others were fed up with her and would almost certainly vote her out if they lost regardless of if it were her fault or not. For someone as competitive as Courtney that puts a lot of pressure on her to give in and play along, just so that she can stay in the game. But yeah, her development isn't nearly over yet.  
Other than that, good luck with your AleNoah World Tour reboot, and thanks for liking my writing so much!

 **Guest:** Oh, don't worry, they will - at least as much as I can, since they're all written in about a week each.

 **ashDanLand:** Thanks! And yeah, Courtney might have changed a bit, and Cameron was able to stand up and lead his team. And I'm glad I was able to surprise you with the non-elimination! Although it alone doesn't mean that there will need to be a double elimination down the road, since with thirteen episodes and thirteen campers there has to be a non-elimination sometime.

 **turn forever you and me:** I'm glad you enjoyed the episode last week, as well as Leonard's beetle whispering. I hope you enjoy what becomes of Harold being on the Rats as well. Though as for Cameron/Izzy...don't count on it.

 **Explorer of the Unknown:** Technically speaking, there doesn't need to be a double elimination at all this season - with thirteen episodes but only thirteen contestants, thee has to be a non-elimination round in order for two people to make it to the finale. The only reason there was a double elimination in canon was to allow Dakota to come back into the game and get mutated. But what I do intend on doing with those plot bits...well, you'll see when the time comes. And yeah, Harold being on the same team as Leonard and Noah and Courtney is going to be...interesting, I think, even if everything doesn't happen immediately. And I'm glad you enjoyed Cameron standing up and getting Courtney to back down, it's something I feel is coming about because rather than Jo demeaning him, Courtney is much more respectful of him so he's been able to grow more confident. And as for the cameo this episode...well, you'll find out soon enough.

 **Elizabeth Fire Ice Heart:** Thanks!

 **bruno14:** Glad to hear it! I'm glad so many people actually liked Leonard last week, it means I'm doing a good job with his portrayal. And yeah, poor Harold getting betrayed by who he thought were his friends. But, at least he's still in the game. I'm happy you enjoyed Justin actually being fairly kind towards Lindsay even if it was just to make sure she was on his side, and of course Cameron and Gwen taking over for Courtney in some respects. I hope you enjoy the rest of the season.

 **PizzaTheBomb:** No, you're right, the Rats are up six to five right now. And certainly, Courtney's anger isn't going to just disappear. Though when and where it'll show up again, only I know... Other than that, I'm glad I've been able to keep everyone in-character so far. Hopefully I'll be able to keep it up as the series progresses.

 **StayOuttaMyShed:** Ah, yeah, it appears you never did review last week. Oh well. Moving on, I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter! Seems like pulling the team switch last week was the right move, building up one outcome but changing it at the last minute in a reasonable way to keep some tension...yeah, I'm glad I did it. And yeah, the Toxic Rats are just jam-packed with nerds now, and it's made for some amazing scenes I think. And yeah, I'm definitely going to be mixing things up with Jasmine's storyline compared to canon, and this betrayal is just one aspect. Glad you're enjoying the rest of the Maggots fairly well too, and yeah I think the Trent-Harold friendship is something I've enjoyed. They weren't really friends in canon, but the Shuffledverse is different enough that they've basically been forced to have each other's backs more. And as for the Rats, I'm glad you're enjoying Gwen and Courtney's dynamic, as well as Noah's potential. And once again, I'm glad yet another reviewer is enjoying Leonard so far. I look forward to hearing your thoughts on this week's episode.

 **The Misguided Angel of Death:** I'm glad you enjoyed it so much! In particular the Zoey-Harold friendship, it's an unusual pair but I think they could really get along. Although, of course, Zoey has just metaphorically stabbed Harold in the back - as has Harold, and this is definitely going to have consequences. And as for the spider monster...well, you'll find out soon enough.

 **FOWLKON:** Yeah, pretty much! There just wasn't anyone I was willing to wrap up just yet last week. I'm glad you enjoyed Courtney's development, she and Gwen certainly have a lot of potential as a duo and I'm glad I was able to push them forward so smoothly. As for Harold, he was trusting more that it would be him, Jasmine, Zoey, and Trent voting for Justin, even if it wasn't explicitly stated. But instead, Jasmine and Zoey flipped to Justin's side with Lindsay. And as for the Rats, considering Cameron spent the canon episode trembling in fear and clinging to his team's flag I figured it would be better if I had him actually do something. I figure that with Courtney around as the female leader instead of Jo, Cameron would be a bit more encouraged and so would be able to take charge a bit more. And hey, it's all worked out so far, so I'm happy. Hopefully I can keep it up, especially with Leonard.

 **RAn:** Ehhh, I don't know if I'm going to do anything like that with Mike's alters. Noah is most certainly not my least favorite (I'd say...Amy probably is? not sure), and as for the ship...I don't really know why you put 'jihad' there but I don't really like it, and I also don't really like the Jasmine/Izzy ship itself.

 **OMAC001:** Yup! And I think this week's episode is gonna be pretty interesting.

 **I. M. Poik:** Well, the non-elimination challenge had to happen sooner or later. And I wouldn't say the episode is just sort of 'there' without it, it ended up setting some stuff up and developing some people, all in all a pretty good episode I think. But hey, that's just me, you're entitled to your own feelings and opinions regarding my work. I am glad you enjoyed Leonard being the one to have booked the wrong hotel, though.

 **Ddynamo:** Yup, there's a good chance that Noah would still be competing if I did a Shuffled RR, though I might also just replace the Reality Pros team with another pair entirely. If I did go for a Nemma rewrite, then Noah's partner...well, it's hard to say since I don't know exactly how he and others are gonna develop, but I'd say Izzy, Gwen, and even Harold are possibilities. And yeah, I won't technically need a double elimination this season as long as I don't have any returnees...though what I'm going to end up doing on both fronts, I admittedly haven't finalized yet.

 **link9753:** Ah, well, I'll admit to being disappointed that you wish Harold would have gone home last week, but to each their own I suppose. I'm glad you still liked the chapter, though, and I think you'll love this one even more.

 **wifishark:** Well, I'm happy to hear you're happy about Harold sticking around. And as for the cameo this week, and the whereabouts of Izzy...well, perhaps you'll find out soon enough.

And that's it for this week's reviews. As a reminder, this is how the teams currently stand:

Toxic Rats: Cameron, Courtney, Gwen, Leonard, Noah, Harold

Mutant Maggots: Jasmine, Justin, Lindsay, Trent, Zoey

And of course, as always, the plug: **_a TVTropes page for this series exists_** , and as per usual with such things, could always use more work. I thoroughly appreciate those who've already been working on it, and look forward to seeing what you all add next.

I hope you're all ready for a spooky episode packed full with, well, lots of things! Enjoy.

\- Fangren

* * *

 **Episode 4 – Finders Creepers**

"Last time, on Total Drama Revenge of the Island!" Chris opened over a stock shot of the camp, the recap montage starting off with a clip of the contestants racing off towards the side of Mt. Looming Tragedy. "Our eleven remaining campers battled it out in a _brutal_ display of brawn and brain," Chef was shown gleefully dropping ice blocks on the climbing campers, catching Jasmine and Zoey but narrowly missing Courtney and Gwen; Noah was shown getting punched by the mutant beetle; and Harold was shown completing his high-powered grappling gun that won his team the first challenge. "Courtney clashed with Gwen over their team's leadership," the goth was shown protesting after Courtney tried to name herself team captain in the ice shack, "while handsome devil _Justin_ used his looks to usurp control of the Maggots from _Jasmine_ ," the supermodel's seduction of Zoey in their team's ice fort was shown as well.

"In the end, the Rats _finally_ came together," Courtney and Gwen were shown working together to steal the Maggots' flag and get it back to their base. "and Justin used his newfound power to give super-geek _Harold_ the boot," Justin was shown seducing Jasmine, and then her and Zoey were shown looking ashamed as Harold was announced as the loser of the vote. "...Or not," Chris laughed as Chef opened his strongbox to reveal the lack of Toxic Marshmallow of Loserdom. "Yeah, I decided to switch him to the Rats instead," the host finished over the original announcement of the twist and Harold's grateful bow.

"And now," Chris said, popping up in front of a shot of the full moon in a cloudy sky with a lit candle in his hand, marking the end of the recap montage, "tonight's challenge is about _fear_." He made a devilish look and clenched his fingers menacingly. "And everyone knows fear is a dish best served, _in the dark!_ " he said in an exaggeratedly spooky manner, an eerie sound playing as he laughed evilly. "Huh?" he stopped suddenly, the camera pulling back to reveal Chef Hatchet standing next to him...dressed like a showgirl with lots of peacock feathers. "Chef!" the host said in annoyance.

"Wardrobe was all out of vampire costumes," Chef explained as the series' capstone them began to play.

"It's all scary!" Chris said, walking off to the left. "Other than _that_ ," he scowled and gestured back toward his off-screen assistant. "Right here! Right now!" he resumed his usual demeanor. "On Total! Drama! _Revenge_ , of the _Island_!" He adopted his spooky tone as he finished the title, and ended with another evil laugh.

xxx

(Fade to Opening Theme)

 _Dear Mom and Dad, I'm doin' fine;_

 _You guys are on my mind!_

 _Ya asked me what I wanted to be,_

 _And now I think the answer is plain to see!_

 _I wanna be...famous!_

 _I wanna live close to the sun!_

 _Well pack your bags, 'cause I've already won!_

 _Everythin' to prove, nothin' in my way;_

 _I'll get there one day._

 _'Cause I wanna be...famous!_

 _(Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

 _I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

 _I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

(Fade to Episode)

xxx

Frogs and crickets chirped and croaked, joined by an owl's hoots as the episode opened on a shot of the full moon. The camera panned down to the cabins as the sound of snoring was added to the nighttime mix, and the scene cut inside to the girls' side of the Maggots' cabin where Lindsay and Zoey were sleeping peacefully in the bunk they shared. Trent and Justin were also shown sound asleep on the boys' side, and the scene cut to the Rat girls to show Courtney and Gwen also sound asleep.

The camera cut next to Cameron's sleeping bag cocoon, then panned up to show Harold sleeping with his butt sticking up in the air and without a doubt the source of the snoring. Cutting to the other side of the room showed Noah, his eyes open and slightly bloodshot as he tossed and turned.

He groaned in annoyance and pushed his pillow over his ears, and after a moment he seemed to have gotten to rest...until the sudden shrill wail of a blowhorn pierced the air.

"RUN FOR YOUR _LIVES_!" Chris hollered from off-screen as the scene cut back outside, the blowhorn continuing even over the panicked shouts of the campers.

The music turned tense as the shot briefly cut to a close-up of the blowhorn still blowing, then over to the Maggots' cabin as they ran outside fully dressed – first Justin screaming "No, please, _no_!"; then Zoey just screaming; then Trent calling out "What's happening?!"; then Lindsay wailing "I don't wanna die!"; and then finally Jasmine dropping down calmly from the roof more annoyed than afraid, calling out "What's going on?"

The Rats were shown next, Courtney grunting "Out of my way!" and pushing Leonard aside so she could slide down the railing; Leonard quickly running after her; Cameron and Harold screaming at the top of their lungs; and Gwen and Noah coming out last at around the same time – Gwen shouting "What _now_?!" while Noah answered "You're asking _me_?!"

They assembled nervously in the common area between cabins, where Chris – wearing a pair of heavy earmuffs – finally eased up on the blowhorn. "Glad you all could make it," he grinned as he took off his headgear. The camera focused in on Harold as he blearily looked around and soon met the gaze of Jasmine and Zoey; the two girls smiled and waved sheepishly, but Harold just crossed his arms, huffed, and looked away.

xxx

"I'm still pretty peeved that Jasmine and Zoey tried to vote me off," Harold confessed. "I mean, _gosh_ , I thought we were becoming friends! It must've been _Justin's_ doing," he said, slamming a fist onto his open palm, "he probably used his good looks to get to them." He paused for a second before trembling and putting his arms across his eyes, adding "At least I _hope_ so!" in an almost sobbing tone.

xxx

"I hope you're all ready," Chris continued, "'cause it's _challenge time_!" He stepped to the side as Chef rolled up a large widescreen television on a wheeled cart. It was currently displaying an aerial map of the island with several additional colored icons – six bright green skulls scattered around the island; three yellowish envelopes over the campfire pit, the western edge of the campgrounds, and deeper into the forest; and a large purple spider in the middle of it all.

"Really?" Courtney spoke up in annoyance. "We're having a challenge _now_?!" As she voice her grievances the camera panned away from her and on to Leonard, who was rooting around in his sleeves with a confused look on his face. He eventually pulled out what appeared to be a wadded-up napkin, unfolded it, and widened his eyes.

xxx

"It's a _message_!" Leonard said in amazement, holding up the napkin to the camera so it would have a better view of the faint writing upon it. "Though from _whom_ I cannot say. Let's see...," he put a fist to his mouth as he cleared his throat, then started reading. "To Leonard the _Mighty_ ," he paused to smile at the camera, "I apologize for contacting you in such a way, but I would prefer to remain anonymous at this time for my own _mystical reasons_. Know, however, that I am your teammate – _and_ on your side, if you would have me. I propose an alliance between us, though more for your sake than my own as I fear you will be the next victim of the vile Hurl of Shame should it come to it. I will contact you with more details at a later time, so for now I request that you keep this a secret from the team."

Leonard blinked, then looked up at the camera. "Wow, I wonder if this is actually legitimate!"

xxx

"Your challenge," Chris continued as though there'd been no interruption, "a _scavenger hunt_ for three creepy souvenirs. Your locations? A haunted forest," he walked across to the other side of the television, "a scaaary pet cemetery, and an _extra_ spooktastic cave. First team to each location gets a special clue," he said, the camera zooming in as he pointed towards the westernmost letter icon on the screen. "But watch out for booby traps," he added jovially as he moved his finger to one of the skulls, "I _really_ went to town with them, heheh." The campers were shown watching warily.

"So move fast," the host added, "and stick _together_. You'll be penalized for each player you lose!"

"Umm, what does the spider represent?" Cameron asked nervously.

"Oh yeah," Chris answered as the shot zoomed in on the icon in question, "some kinda gigantic mutated _spider_ showed up in the woods the other day, and it's running around loose on the island."

The cast immediately started to voice there fears and protests, the shot zooming on on Cameron in particular as he shivered and looked around, moaning "Oh no..." in terror.

xxx

"I have a _severe_ case of arachnophobia," the bubble-boy explained, already beginning to panic. "Spiders are just so _creepy_ , literally! Anything with that many legs _must_ be _evil_!" He grabbed himself and shuddered in fear, then recoiled away as a small spider dropped down next to him on a line of silk.

xxx

"But, because I'm feeling _nice_ ," Chris continued with an almost smug look, "I decided to call in some back-up for you guys. Say hello to classic competitor and freelance monster hunter, _Shawn_!" An unexpectedly heroic tune played as Chris motioned to the top of the Maggots' cabin, the camera panning up as well to show a familiar silhouette against the night sky. The scruffy form of the zombie-obsessed survivalist leaped down with a flip and a smirk, landing on his feet next to Chris and Chef.

"Technically," he corrected the host, "I'm a freelance _zombie_ hunter who also accepts non-zombie jobs on the side. Also," he added with a more hesitant expression, "I'm getting paid for this, right?"

Chris looked away suspiciously, and the camera panned over to the face of Jasmine as she smiled excitedly.

xxx

"Okay, this is probably gonna sound cheesy," Jasmine told the outhouse camera, "but Shawn is my _favorite_ of the classic competitors. He's cute, he's funny, and he's got an _amazing_ amount of knowledge and skill in the outdoors, so he's sort of like...my idol, I guess. The zombie thing's a little _strange_ ," she admitted with an uncertain look, "but I suppose it's just a part of what makes him, well, _him_."

xxx

"Shawn's gonna be hanging around to keep watch for the spider monster," Chris explained, "and will try to capture it when it comes to it. But he is _not_ gonna interfere with the challenge otherwise, got it?" He sent a stern gaze both to the campers and to Shawn, all of whom stared blankly or nodded in implied agreement.

"Good," Chris smiled, and the dramatic and almost heroic tune started playing again. "With that said, there's nothing to fear but mortal _terror_ itself! Talk soon," he added impishly, sounding his blowhorn once again.

The eleven campers ran off towards the woods, with Shawn right there with them.

/

The footage flashed ahead to another shot of the full moon over the forested hills of Wawanakwa, an owl hooting as the scene cut down to ground level. The logo of the Toxic Rats appeared in the corner of the screen just before the team itself did, running up and stopping in front of a tree with a loudspeaker set up in its branches.

"Okay guys, we're off to a great start," Courtney said confidently just before the loudspeaker whined into activity.

"Welcome to the Haunted Forest!" Chris announced over it, the shot panning downward to show the six Rats gathering around a small crack in the ground. "Your clue can be found at the base of this tree!"

"As the newest member of the team, I volunteer to grab it," Harold offered, earning an eyeroll from Courtney as he bent down, reached into the hole...and gasped in pain as something metallic snapped inside the hole.

"Inside a _bear trap_ ," Chris finished his announcement with a laugh.

Harold withdrew his hand from the hole, the trap clamped down firmly on his arm – though he was at least clutching a note in his hand. "Take it, _please_!' he said, passing it to a mildly shocked Gwen. Just as the goth was about to read it, the sound of approaching footsteps distracted her and her teammates.

"Aww man, we got here _last_ ," Justin lamented from the front of the five Maggots. "Thanks a lot for not leading us through the woods, Jasmine," he shot back at the amazon, standing in the back and looking around with an almost concerned expression.

" _Hey_!" Zoey shot back in outrage. "It's not her fault!"

"Hmm?" Jasmine said, finally looking back towards her teammates. "Oh, yeah, no big deal, let's keep moving," she said, running ahead and waving for her teammates to follow.

"Hmmmm...," Courtney murmured, watching with narrow eyes as they ran past.

/

The shot cut to the Maggots as they stopped at a clearing further along the trail. "So, what's the plan, Jasmine?" Zoey asked the girl in front.

"Easy," Jasmine answered, "we just hide out here and see where the Rats go, then follow _them_ to the next clue."

"Great idea," Trent told her. "Everyone find a place to hide." He quickly looked around, then dived into a thorn bush; Zoey joined him a second later; Jasmine jumped up and started climbing a tree; Justin hid behind another one; and after a moment of panic and indecision Lindsay joined him.

"Now we just have to keep quiet and wait," Trent whispered to Zoey, their eyes peering out of the thorn bush.

"I hope they come by soon," Zoey added in between pained 'Oww's.

/

"And, _why_ are we going off the path?" Noah asked dryly as the scene cut back to the Rats.

"So the Maggots can't follow us," Courtney answered irritably as she cleared a path through another thorn bush, her and her teammates stopping just beyond it. "Okay Gwen, read the clue," she told the goth.

"Inside a knot is a nest," Gwen read. "Your souvenir lives with a pest. Find Polaris to travel northwest? Not as creepy as I was hoping for."

"Well I think it's _fascinating_ ," Leonard smiled.

"And _easy_ ," Harold added confidently. "Since Polaris, the North Star, is _there_ ," he pointed up at the sky through the trees, "northwest is in _that_ direction!" He ran off eagerly, the rest of his new teammates following suit.

/

"Greeaaat, we're back on the path again," Courtney said in annoyance, the footage having flashed ahead to show her team passing through a familiar-looking area. Once they'd left the screen, the five members of the Mutant Maggots poked their heads out of their hiding places and smiled.

/

The Rats' logo reappeared as the footage skipped ahead again to them running along through the woods; Gwen in back then Noah, Cameron, Harold, and Leonard, with Courtney in front.

"Inside a knot is a _nest_...a souvenir...then _something_...," Noah muttered to himself as the shot zoomed in on him. "Hey gruesome, what was the rest of that poem again?" he called back without taking his eyes off the path ahead.

He was answered by the goth's bloodcurdling scream, and immediately skidded to a stop. "Oh no!" he yelled rising panic, a sharp note playing as he looked back to see nobody behind him.

" _Gwen?!_ " Courtney called out in fear and concern as the shot cut back to show that the rest of the Rats had stopped in their tracks.

"The monster _spider_ must've gotten her!" Cameron screamed, gripping the sides of his head in panic. The shot cut outward as he did so, showing a large purple spider crawling down though the shadows of the forest trees.

"We lost _Gwen_ ," Courtney repeated in disbelief, her breathing becoming faster and more shallow. "We get penalized for each person we lose, and we're already down the only one of us that's at _home_ in this stupid scare-fest..."

"W-we must remain _calm_ , fellows, lest the beast pick us off one by one!" Leonard said, unable to hide his own fear.

Harold nodded, and put a hand on Courtney's shoulder as she tried to control her breathing. "Just focus on the challenge," the dweeb told her. "We need to find a knot with a nest."

"Th-that's right," Courtney said. "We can look for Gwen later...just...focus on finding the knot with a nest for now...EVERYBODY LOOK FOR A KNOT WITH A NEST!" she demanded, startling the others out of their fear.

"I think I see one! And it has team colors!" Cameron announced immediately, pointing off to the right; the camera quick-panned over to a large tree with a noticeable hollow knot in the trunk with the hints of a nest inside; a few green and red marks had been spray-painted on the bark under it.

"Good," Courtney said, immediately rushing towards it, "great! We'll get _this_ , and then start looking for Gwen!" She started climbing up the trunk as the rest of her team ran up to join her, and soon began to root through the tree hollow with one arm.

Suddenly, a large eye opened up inside the hollow and stared directly at her. She screamed, and the music rose dramatically as several squid-like tentacles reached out of the tree's other hollows. One quickly grabbed her around the neck and held her up, while another gave her a few wet slaps then poked her in the eye.

"Hey! Watch it!" she yelped in pain and terror. In response the tentacle tightened its grip, and Courtney began to choke.

"Aaahh! What do we do!?" Noah yelled, gripping his head in panic.

"I don't know!" Cameron replied in panic of his own.

"Oh, _curse_ my feebled powers!" Leonard added.

"H- _help me_!" Courtney gasped.

Harold looked around, then bent down and picked up a handful of small stones. "Quick, throw rocks at it!" he commanded, tossing the stone he'd picked up one by one.

The other boys quickly followed suit, but they seemed to be hitting Courtney more than the mutant squid-tree monster. Eventually, the thing just raised its captive up even higher, then slammed her down onto the ground and hissed at the others.

"RUN!" Noah shouted, turning to flee as a tentacle shot towards the four nerds, forcing them to scatter. Unfortunately, the thing was still able to catch Harold by the leg, and lifted him up into the air.

"We should have thrown something else!" Harold cried in pain as the mutant began to punch him in the stomach with a curled-up tentacle.

The sounds of pain and wet punches caused Courtney to stir...and quickly become angry. "Okay, that is _it_!" she declared, getting back on her feet and storming towards the tree-squid while it was distracted. "I am _not_ gonna take that from some overgrown piece of _calamari_!" She climbed back up the trunk, and with a roar of rage she punched the mutant right in its eye.

The beast bellowed in pain, dropping Harold and retracting into its tree.

" _Finally_ ," the former CIT muttered in frustration as she reached into the knot once again, quickly and triumphantly pulling out a brass key. "I got the souvenir!" she called down to her teammates...just before a strand of spider's webbing shot down from above, sticking on to her head and pulling her away into the treetops.

The key dropped down to the forest floor, and landed in front of Harold who grinned when he saw it, unaware of what had just happened. "Score! We got the key!"

"But at what _cost_?" Noah said anxiously as he, Cameron, and Leonard rejoined their fellow nerd.

"We've lost our two strongest members!" Cameron added, still panicking.

"W-well, this isn't the _first_ time I've had to face such a terrible monster," Leonard spoke up. "I'm sure if we all band together and make use of our many skills, we can achieve anything!"

As he spoke the shot changed to a perspective further away, and the footage switched to an infrared shot of the four boys.

"Agreed," Harold nodded. "We have what we came for, so we should keep going. Wouldn't the girls want it this way?"

"I...I _guess_ so...," Cameron said, his panic fading slightly as he forced himself to think.

"I don't know if I can trust the judgment of a guy who's only been on our team for less than a day," Noah said nervously as the scene returned to normal, "but I _really_ don't wanna stick around here so yeah, let's go with that."

Just then, the five Maggots arrived on the scene. "Hey guys!" Zoey greeted. "Glad to see you're all still here!" She and Jasmine looked at Harold in particular, but the dweeb just huffed and looked away earning a disappointed frown from both of the girls.

Leonard quickly cleared his throat and stepped to the front of the group. "Yes, greetings to you as well. As you can undoubtedly see," he said with an enthusiastic cheer to hide his nervousness, "our party has _split up_ to better search for the artifact we seek, and the ladies have gone elsewhere. We'd best leave this place as well, right fellows?" he looked back and asked the remnants of his team.

All three smiled and nodded their agreement, backing up with Leonard before turning and running off.

"...well, that was _odd_ ," Jasmine remarked, hands on her hips and brow quirked.

"Ooh! Ooh! I _see_ something!" Lindsay piped up excitedly, pointing off to the camera's right – the direction of the squid-tree. "I think it has our _colors_ on it!" The camera briefly cut over to the knot in question, with a focus on the marks below it in the two teams' colors.

"Good catch, Lindsay," Jasmine told the beaming blonde before dashing off and quickly climbing the tree. A few seconds of rummaging later and she smiled, pulling out the key. "I got the first object! Catch!" she told her teammates, tossing the key down to them.

Trent caught it and held up so he and Zoey could get a better look at it. "Huh, I guess maybe we're gonna have to unlock something," he suggested. "Cool. Maybe we can get ahead of the Rats now."

"Yeah," Zoey said. "Also, I _think_ Harold's still mad," she added anxiously.

"Well why wouldn't he be?" Trent asked. "I mean, he nearly got hurled the other night!"

"I know," Zoey said. "And I'm feeling _really_ guilty about it."

"Why?" Justin asked. "I mean, we had to vote out _somebody_ , and Harold was the obvious choice!" Despite his smile, both Trent and Zoey glared at him.

xxx

"Uggh, why did I let him talk me into voting out a guy I actually have things in _common_ with?" Zoey berated herself. "I _have_ to try and resist his looks from now on. His... _incredible_ looks...," she said, her resolve visibly wavering.

xxx

"Man, that twist with putting Harold on the other team is kinda messing up my game a bit," Justin told the outhouse camera. "I'm gonna have to step things up a notch if I wanna keep my hold over Zoey."

xxx

The static cut back to a close-up of Justin, his eyes closed as he shook his head. "Look, Zoey, I know-" he began to say, the shot pulling back as he opened his eyes to see Zoey and Trent walking away from him. Before he could say anything, however, a line of spider silk shot down from the treetops, wrapped around his mouth, and pulled him up out of sight.

The camera cut over to the Trent and Zoey and Lindsay, who had just regrouped with Jasmine. "Okay, I reckon the Rats must've been trying to throw us off, and-" she paused and furrowed her brow, looking behind her teammates. "Wait, where's Justin?"

The other three looked behind them and gasped. "Oh no, Justin!" Lindsay cried out. "Justin!" she called out, beginning to run around the area. "Justin, where are you?!"

Jasmine sighed. "Look, I don't like saying this, but I think we're gonna have to move on without him. I'm sure Shawn's around here somewhere, we can trust _him_ to do the rescuing."

"Man, I hope so," Trent said as he and Zoey exchanged a nervous look.

/

The scene flashed to the survivalist in question, currently clinging to the top of a pine tree and scanning the forest below. "Oh man," he said to himself, "where _is_ that thing? If I can just find its _lair_ then maybe I can figure out a way to trap it."

/

"Well, that might have bought us some _time_ , at least," Noah said as the scene moved back to him and the other remaining Rats running through the forest. "So good job, Leonard the Green."

"Thank you," the LARPer replied, not taking his eyes off the path.

"Umm, Leonard?" Cameron spoke up hesitantly. "When you said you'd faced terrible monsters before, what did you mean exactly?"

"Hmm, let's see," Leonard thought, slowing down and counting off on his fingers. "There was the Umber _Colossus_ , the Ruby Dragon of _Coramathea_ , the Lich King of _Quebec_ , dozens of _vampires_ , and that's not even counting the hordes of _lesser_ evils I have vanquished," he told his teammates. "No spider monsters of note, though, at least that I can recall."

Cameron's eyes narrowed in disbelief.

xxx

" _None_ of that made any _sense_!" the bubble-boy exclaimed. "I can't figure him out, it's like he's living in a completely different _world_!" Cameron stopped and sighed. "But I don't think I can handle figuring him out while I'm worrying about Gwen and Courtney. Maybe I can ask one of the others for help on this."

xxx

"Darn," Harold told the wizard as the scene moved back to them now walking at a steady pace. "But at least if we make it through this, you can add the Spider Monster of Wawanakwa to that impressive list of yours."

"Oh, I'd certainly like that," Leonard nodded happily.

"Okay, enough with the chatter," Noah interrupted, snatching the key from Harold and jogging ahead. "Let's get this graveyard train a- _rolling_ , boys!" The other boys followed him, but the camera kept its focused on Noah as he passed a tree stump, then a rock; then stepped on a mysterious clump of dirt...which exploded and sent him flying.

His teammates stopped immediately, the shot showing only the shock and occasional glow on their faces as they watched Noah get launched from one land mine to the next off-screen.

The camera finally cut back to him, singed and groaning on the ground in an awkward but still holding the Rats' key. A group of people approached him moments later, but rather than his teammates it was the Maggots; Lindsay brought up their rear. "Hi Nick," she cheerfully stopped to tell Noah, "thanks for clearing those out for us. By the way, have you seen Justin anywhere?"

" _No_ ," Noah said bitterly.

"Aww," Lindsay said in disappointment before running off to rejoin her team.

"Well then gentleman," Noah added dryly as his teammates warily approached, "it seems the graveyard train has been _delayed_." With that and a grunt, his body collapsed into a flatter position.

/

A low, ominous tune played as the scene cut to the lantern-lit cemetery. The camera panned left across its headstones and crosses, several of which were pet-themed, to the entrance as the four remaining Mutant Maggots arrived, huffing and puffing from their run.

"Welcome to the Wawanakwa Pet Cemetery!" Chris greeted them over the loudspeaker.

"Looks like we're first," Jasmine said with the key in her hand, looking around as her teammates started to fan out. "The first clue should be nearby."

"Found it!" Zoey called out moments later, directing her team's attention to a small coffin lying in a small open grave. The camera cut in close as she opened the lid, revealing a ragged piece of paper within bearing a list of numbers: 1 in the first row; in the second; 1 in the third. Notably, while most of the numbers were plain black the three 6s and the 18 were all an eye-catching red.

" _Whoa_...," Trent said as the perspective cut back to its usual sideview, showing him, Lindsay, and Jasmine reading over Zoey's shoulders. "Three 6s is some baaad mojo, man, even with that 18 in the middle of 'em."

"Don't worry," Jasmine told him, "I'm sure it'll be fine. Now let's split up and search for numbers," she directed her team before taking off into the cemetery alone. Zoey took off in a different direction a few moments later with a rather nervous and bewildered Lindsay following her, leaving Trent all alone.

The musician took a deep breath. "Okay man, you can handle this. You're only in a creepy cemetery in the middle of the night looking for three 6s, it's no big deal." He paused a moment, then took out his lucky rabbit's foot. "But just in case...," he murmured, raising the charm to his forehead and counting as he tapped it, "one-two-three-four-five-six-seven-eight- _nine_."

/

The scene flashed to Jasmine crouched down, wiping some moss off a headstone. She frowned upon seeing the lack of 6s, stood up and started to back away as an eerie tune played

The music quickly peaked as she bumped into something, which shrieked "Zombie!" as the two spun to face each other.

"Shawn!" Jasmine said upon seeing the scruffy survivalist.

"Oh! It's you!" the veteran player said, quickly calming down a little bit. "Sorry, I'm just a little _on-edge_ being in this cemetery and all. And, uh...what's your name again?" he added, awkwardly rubbing the back of his head.

"It's Jasmine," the Aussie said, extending her hand which Shawn promptly but briskly shook. "So, any sightings of that monster?"

"Nice to meet you, Jasmine," Shawn replied. "And to answer your question, not many. And even _those_ are usually just before or after it abducts someone. Unfortunately, it's either too fast or too _camouflaged_ for me to keep track of it in the dark."

"Really?" Jasmine asked. "So who else has been captured besides Justin?"

"Uh, assuming Justin is that Hawaiian guy on _your_ team, then it's just those two girls from the _other_ team."

Jasmine let out an impressed and almost fearful whistle. "I thought as much, but it's still hard to believe _they_ got picked off first."

"Yeah, seeing who they were with I can _kinda_ see what you mean," Shawn said.

/

The scene flashed to Zoey and Lindsay, the redhead looking at a headstone of her own while the blonde stood around behind her looking somewhat lost. "So, umm, what are we looking for again?" she asked.

"Three 6s and an 18, remember?" Zoey answered, standing up from the headstone she'd just determined was blank. "It should be our next souvenir."

"Oh, right," Lindsay nodded happily, but frowning again after a second. "Wait, what about Justin? Shouldn't we be looking for him too?"

"I... _guess_ so," Zoey admitted as she began to check a large cross. She was silent for a minute as Lindsay finally started spinning what looked to be a grave marker in the shape of a hamster wheel, then finally said "Hey, do you think we made the right decision the other night when we voted out Harold?"

Lindsay looked over and raised a brow in thoughtful confusion. "What do you mean? Justin had a point about Harold not really fitting in with the rest of us, and it's not like we were gonna vote out a super hottie like _him_ ," he expression briefly turned dreamy, "you know?"

"I _guess_...," Zoey said uncertainly.

/

"Okay, no black cats or ravens," Trent said warily as he backed through the graveyard clutching his lucky rabbit's foot, "and better yet, no _spider monsters_. I think I really am _safe_ ," he told himself, pausing to smile. "Now, lets see if I can find any _numbers_..."

He turned around and started examining the nearest headstone, the music building ominously until the shot cut to a view from afar, the footage switching back to infrared. The monster serving as the camera's viewpoint blinked, and when it opened its eyes it had gotten much closer to the musician, and had extended four sharp limbs with tiny claws on the end towards him...

Trent's scream echoed through the cemetery, quickly catching the attention of Shawn, Jasmine, Lindsay, and Zoey as they looked up in shock. " _Trent_!" the three girls cried out in concern, the footage quickly skipping ahead to show all four arriving at the location the superstitious young man had been snatched from.

"Oh _no_...," Zoey said in shock, picking up his dropped lucky rabbit's foot.

/

The scene flashed to the Rat boys, who were walking through the pet cemetery in a loose pack, stopping to check the headstones as they passed by. The camera focused on Leonard as he squinted and looked around, quickly spotting something and smiling. "Hark, men!" he called, the camera zooming out to show the others giving him their attention. "My Arcane Eyes of Farsight have detected something _secret_!" He pointed off to the right, the camera panning over to show a large, grimy coffin propped upright against a couple statues.

"I don't know," Cameron said warily as the four boys approached, "I don't see any 6s."

"Meh," Noah shrugged, walking forward with their key in hand, "it can't hurt to check."

Mere inches from putting the key in the lock, Fang burst out of the coffin with a menacing grin.

"I was wrong!" Noah said in terror. " _RRRRUUN_!" The four boys ran away screaming.

Fang moved to chase after them, but paused after a single step. The camera moved to his other side as his brow furrowed and he sniffed the air, then growled angrily – showing off his missing tooth.

A strand of spider web shot at him from above and behind, quickly wrapped him up, and moments later the rather startled mutant shark was being dragged off into the night...

/

A flash took the scene back to the four Rat boys, now catching their breath against a statue of a happy-looking dachshund.

"It's a shame my magic powers are being blocked," Leonard lamented. "I _easily_ have enough mana to banish Fang with a simple displacement spell."

" _Ssuurree_...," Noah said slowly, looking away and rolling his eyes.

"Personally," Harold spoke up, "I'd have thought a _transmutation_ spell more appropriate." Cameron was briefly shown raising an eyebrow at his newest teammate.

Leonard shrugged. "Either-or, I suppose. Now if you don't mind, I'll go check and see if the danger has passed."

He left unopposed, and the camera stayed on the other boys. "Excuse me, Harold?" Cameron spoke up, tapping the dweeb on his shoulder. "You seem to have a better understanding of Leonard than the rest of us. Do you mind sharing your insights into his abnormal mental state?"

"Abnormal?" Harold replied, raising an eyebrow in confusion. "What do you mean _abnormal_?"

"He means Leonard thinks he's a _wizard_ ," Noah clarified.

This just seemed to puzzle Harold even more. "Wait, you guys _really_ didn't see through it?" Now Cameron and Noah were looking confused, but Harold just smiled confidently and stood up – just as Leonard returned.

"Well, no sign of Fang," Leonard told them cheerily.

"Awesome," Harold said, putting a hand on the LARPer's back and gently guiding him to the others. "But before we move on, do you mind talking for a bit out-of-character?"

"Certainly!" Leonard beamed. "In fact, I was beginning to think nobody was gonna ask me that and I was just gonna have to keep up the wizard RP the whole time I was here!"

A flat note played as Cameron and Noah were shown sharing an utterly stunned look, then slowly turning their heads to look back at Leonard. "You mean...the wizard thing..." Noah began to say.

"...was all just some kind of _act_?" Cameron finished.

"Well _duh_ ," Leonard said in mild offense. "I don't _really_ think I have magic."

"Wait, wait, wait," Noah said, pinching the bridge of his nose in irritation. "This still doesn't add up. What kind of guy _willingly_ roleplays during a reality TV competition without telling anybody? Did you _want_ us to vote you out first?"

Leonard drooped sadly, and actually took off his wizard's hat – and beard, for it was attached to the hat. "Look, fellas, here's the thing. Aside from LARPing, I'm not good at much of anything. I really didn't think I'd be able to get on the show if I'd just been my everyday self, and even if I _did_ I figured I just would've been the first one out anyway. But as the goofy _wizard_ kid, then at least I could be a _memorable_ first one out, challenge myself by staying in-character as long as possible, and get to do something I _love_ along the way. And who knows, maybe I could even get some people interested in LARP!"

"Wow," Noah said, sharing another stunned look with Cameron while Harold smiled proudly. "That's almost... _respectable_ , in a really dumb kinda way. Sorry for thinking you were just some kinda screwball."

"And I'm sorry too," Cameron added sheepishly, "for thinking you were something I should study."

"Don't worry about it, I've dealt with worse," Leonard said with a cheerful yet dismissive wave. "But for now," he said, putting his hat and beard back on and adopting a dramatic tone as he raised a fist as a dramatic tune welled up in the background, "onward, to the next artifact!"

"Onward!" Harold chorused, raising a fist of his own.

"Yeah!" Noah and Cameron chimed in, right before a line of webbing shot in from the left, wrapped around Noah's head, and dragged him off with a muffled cry for help.

His three teammates stood there stone silent for a beat with their fists still raised, then broke out screaming and ran in the opposite direction.

/

The scene cut to Chris, who was watching feeds of both teams on a trio of monitors and laughing hysterically as the background music turned low and ominous. "Will _anyone_ make it to the spooky cave?" he turned and asked the camera, holding a covered cup with a straw in it. "And if so, how can they _possibly_ make it all the way to the finish line? Less brain, more pain, when we return!" he said, finishing with a sip of his drink.

(Fade to Commercial and Back)

The episode resumed with a dramatic tune, the shot panning down from yet another shot of the moon onto the three Maggot girls plus Shawn walking warily through the pet cemetery, keeping their backs towards each other.

"You, uh, you don't have to stick with us, you know," Jasmine told the veteran player.

"True," Shawn admitted, "but that spider monster is probably gonna try to pick off you girls so I'd rather stick around."

"Thanks, you're quite the gentleman," Jasmine said with a smile.

"Hey guys," Zoey called out, gaining the attention of both, "I think I found something over here!" The shot zoomed out to reveal that Zoey and Lindsay had separated from the other two, and were now proudly flanking a large headstone. "See?" the indie girl said as the shot came in for a close-up, detailing both a skull mark and a date engraved below it. "June 06, 1806," Zoey read. "That's 6, 6, 18, 6, right?"

"Yeah!" Jasmine said with a smile. "Good eye, and look," the camera cut back to the headstone's close-up as the taller survivalist pointed a finger at the skull mark's oddly-shaped nose hole, "there's a keyhole too."

The shot cut back out to show the whole group as Jasmine eagerly inserted the key, turned it, and was promptly flung backward into Shawn and out of sight by a large, spring-loaded coffin bursting out of a trap door in the ground.

"Oh, heheh, whoops," Jasmine giggled and snorted, now face-to-face on top of Shawn. "Shoulda thought to check for booby traps first," she said as she stood back up.

"Haha, yeah," Shawn said before becoming abruptly more serious. "But seriously, for some reason Chris _wants_ you in zombie territory right now, so you gotta be careful around graves. You never know when a brain-muncher is gonna pop out and drag you into the ranks of the undead."

"Yeah, haha," Jasmine laughed awkwardly, "right. I'll keep that in mind."

"Hey Jasmine!" Zoey called out, getting the two survivalists' attention yet again. "We got flashlights!" The camera cut to the inside of the now-opened coffin, revealing several flashlights standing on a shelf in it.

"Score," Jasmine smiled, rejoining her teammates with a wary-looking Shawn behind her. "Grab 'em and let's head out."

Zoey and Lindsay smiled and scooped up the flashlights, then ran off. Jasmine lingered long enough to close the coffin and shove it back into its hole, then ran off with Shawn.

The music became tense as the camera panned in the opposite direction, eventually stopping on a large tree. After a moment Cameron leaned out from behind it, followed by Leonard stooped over him, and Harold standing over both. The three boys met eyes and nodded, then ran out into the open and to the grave they'd just seen their rivals make use of.

"Okay," Cameron said as Harold slowly reached out to put their key into the keyhole, "we have to do this _carefully_ so we don't get flung."

"Right," Harold nodded, and the three boys moved to the other side of the headstone.

Harold bent over, turned the key, and was flung off-screen when the spring-loaded coffin caught him in the chin. Leonard and Cameron winced at the sound of his crash, and looked at each other when their fellow nerd moaned "I should've been more careful!"

/

The music became tense and trilling as the footage flashed to Shawn and Jasmine standing before the entrance to a cave, the mouth flanked on either side by flags bearing the team logos.

"It's... _smaller_ than I was expecting," Jasmine said with a nervous look.

"Welcome to your final destination!" Chris announced over an unseen loudspeaker, startling both survivalists and laughing evilly before adding "The clue is just inside the entrance...aaand down the tunnel...into total darkness. Good luck! Yooouuu'll _neeeeed_ iiit!"

"You should probably go find your teammates," Shawn told the current camper. "I'll go ahead and check for the _monster_."

"Right," Jasmine said with a hint of anxiousness, "but before that, do you mind if I ask you something?"

"Uh, sure, I guess?" Shawn answered hesitantly.

"It's about Harold," Jasmine said, quickly adding "he's the redhaired guy on the other team," upon noticing Shawn's blank look. "See, he was actually on _my_ team up until the last elimination ceremony, where we _kinda_ voted him out? Only Chris decided to put him on the _Rats_ instead of sending him home."

"...huh," Shawn said blankly. "Sounds like a heck of a twist."

"Yeah, and its just made me feel _awfully_ guilty since I basically let Justin talk me into voting for the guy when he didn't deserve it," Jasmine said, hanging her head in shame. "I really wanna make it up to him, but I'm not sure how. Do you have any advice?"

Shawn raised an eyebrow. "Well, uh, seeing how I've never been in anything _like_ either of your situations, it's kinda hard to _say_. But if I had to guess, I'd say apologize to him and vote that Justin guy off. People who use their looks to get their way are bad news, _trust me_."

"Right," Jasmine said with an embarrassed smile, "I probably should've thought of that myself. I'll just, umm, go find Zoey and Lindsay, okay?"

"You do what you gotta do," Shawn told her calmly, and she ran off without another word. "And I'll do what _I_ gotta do," he said to himself before entering the cave.

/

The scene flashed inside and Shawn peered around, slowly walking into darkness. "Probably should've asked Chris if I could have one of those _flashlights_ ," he said right before bumping in to what appeared to be the skeleton of an intern suspended in a web, a note taped to its tattered plaid shirt. "This is probably their clue," Shawn remarked, looking closely at the note then reaching out and lightly touching the web. "Hmm...I wonder...," he said thoughtfully before hearing a skittering sound behind him and stiffening up.

"Who's there?" he shouted, whirling around with his hands in a fighting pose. He was answered by a line of webbing shooting down from the ceiling and wrapping around his body; and he gave the camera a wide-eyed " _Crud_...," before he was pulled up and away.

/

A hollow, eerie sound played as the scene cut to a close-up of Jasmine's boots as she ran through the graveyard. The camera cut outward as she ran up to Zoey and Lindsay, who were wandering the area with flashlights in their hands, and said "Okay girls, Shawn and I found the cave. Let's move!"

"Right," Zoey nodded, following Jasmine as she turned and ran back the way she'd came.

"Ooh, I can't believe we're gonna _do_ it!" Lindsay squealed happily, running alongside the redhead.

"Don't get ahead of yourself, Lindsay," Jasmine cautioned. "We're doing good, but we don't know where the Rats are and we still have to deal with that," she shuddered, "tiny little _cave_."

Her teammates furrowed their brows and shared a look of concern. "Wait, Jasmine, you're not scared of the _cave_ , are you?"

"Yeah, we have flashlights so it's not like it'll be _dark_ ," Lindsay added.

"It's more the tight spaces that I can't stand," Jasmine admitted. "But don't worry about me, I'll be fine, _trust_ me."

Her teammates just shared another nervous look.

/

The scene flashed back to the cave entrance. "Shawn!" Jasmine called out as the shot cut to her, Zoey, and Lindsay standing just inside, flashlights already turned on. "Shawn, where are you?"

"Sorry, Jenna, I don't think he's here anymore," Lindsay said while Zoey moved on ahead.

"I know what _is_ , though," Zoey spoke up, waving for her teammates to join her in front of the intern's skeleton. "The clue!" she said, picking the note off the webbed-up corpse. "'By hook or by crook, the end is near if you look'," she quickly read.

"Okay, _now_ can I be excited that we're gonna do it?" Lindsay asked Jasmine. "Because we _totally_ are."

xxx

"Okay, even though Todd and Justin were _totally_ kidnapped by that spider monster," Lindsay gushed to the confessional, "I am _so_ feeling pumped for this. I mean, sure I have to run around in the dirty cave, but I also get the chance to really _do_ something and show that I'm more than just the prettiest girl on the show!"

xxx

"Ooh! Ooh! I _see_ another something!" Lindsay piped up eagerly as the static cut away to the three Maggot girls walking through the cave, Jasmine hunched over and shivering nervously in the back. The camera panned ahead along their beams of light to show a creepy skull-like rock with several metal hooks sticking out of it, and all three girls smiled.

"Good, these must be the last souvenirs," Jasmine said with a hint of franticness, rushing over to the skull-shaped rock. "Let's take 'em and get outta here."

"Wait, Jasmine, _watch out_!" Zoey cried out in sudden panic, the music rising sharply as Lindsay gasped in fear.

"Huh?" the taller girl said, looking back nervously just as a line of web shot down from the ceiling and quickly wrapped her up, encasing just about everything but her head. "Oh no," she moaned before getting hauled up by the spider. It hissed at her menacingly but she didn't seem to notice, clenching her eyes shut and squirming against her bonds. "So _tight_...," she groaned again, and with a hiss of effort the spider tossed her to the side.

She landed on a larger web suspended in the ceiling, and the shot zoomed out to reveal that the others who'd been captured were with her – Gwen, Courtney, Justin, Fang, Noah, Trent, and Shawn.

"Well, there goes our last good chance at getting _out_ of here," Courtney remarked in annoyance.

"Would you stop _saying_ that?" Gwen said, more panicked than any of the other captives save Jasmine. "Being wrapped up like this inside this _cave_ is _freaking_ me out enough as it is!"

"Hey, come on now," Trent said calmly, "I'm sure one of the _others_ will figure something out. The spider can't get _all_ of them, right?"

"I wouldn't count on it," Noah replied.

The shot cut back down to the cave floor, Zoey and Lindsay still looking up nervously just as Harold, Leonard, and Cameron finally arrived on the scene.

"Well, I guess we've found the right place," Leonard commented in a dry shock, moving his flashlight from the hook-bearing skull-rock up to the web full of captives.

" _I'll_ say," Harold added, his knees trembling.

"Oh no," Cameron moaned, hiding behind Harold and looking up at the giant hissing spider, "it's even more hideous and terrifying than I imagined!"

The spider seemed to take offense to that, narrowing its eyes and shrieking. It turned around and shot a line of silk out of its abdomen toward the five campers; all of them shrieked, but only Zoey, Lindsay, Leonard, and Harold were able to duck away in time. The webbing hit Cameron and quickly wrapped him up, and seconds later the spider pulled him up to the ceiling and threw him screaming into the web without a further gesture.

"Oh my gosh, what do we _do_?!" Lindsay asked in a panic.

"We have to save them!" Zoey answered, not looking remotely confident. She looked around at the others, and added "Maybe if we all work together we can take down that spider and save our teammates?"

"A truce between opposing forces for the greater good?" Leonard questioned. "Perhaps that _would_ allow us to vanquish such a mighty foe," he added, looking upwards.

"Well I don't like it," Harold objected. "How do we know you won't just try to run off and win the challenge while _we_ put our butts on the line?" he motioned to his teammate and himself.

"W-well, you're just gonna have to trust us," Zoey told him.

"Trust _you_?" Harold scoffed. "After you tried to vote me _off_? As if."

" _Please_ ," Zoey pleaded, "we might need your help to rescue the others!"

The camera panned up to Jasmine and Cameron on the rightmost edge of the web, the former snapping out of her claustrophobia-induced panic to listen in as Harold said " _Might_?! You want me to _trust_ you and you aren't even sure if I'll be _useful_?"

"I-I didn't meant it like _that_..." Zoey tried to say off-screen.

"Oh no," Jasmine moaned softly, "how could I have let this happen?"

"I think we have bigger things to worry about," Cameron spoke up nervously as the music became tense. " _SPIDERRRR_!" he screamed, the shot cutting outward to show the giant mutant arachnid crawling towards them, its fangs dripping green venom.

"Somebody _do_ something!" Jasmine shouted, earning gasps from the four who hadn't been captured.

"Harold, _please_!" Zoey told her former teammate again, Lindsay joining in next to her giving the dweeb a pleading look.

The nerd grimaced a bit, then spat out " _Fine_!" The twos girls gasped happily, then all four began to run off...but only got a few steps each before a panicked murmur dew their attention back up to the web.

The spider was hissing right at Cameron, and the shot cut in for for a close-up of the the boy's sweating, trembling, and utterly terrified face.

And then, with a mighty scream, Cameron burst free of his silken cocoon and tackled the giant spider clear off the web. They swung away on a line of silk attaching the spider to the ceiling, and the bubble-boy began to pound furiously on the back of the mutant's abdomen.

xxx

"Ahhh, _adrenaline_ ," Cameron said confidently in the outhouse confessional, his arms crossed proudly, "nature's super strength formula. Someone should really bottle it."

xxx

"Well, I guess that takes care of that," Leonard said blankly as he and the others continued to look up. "I guess all that's left is for one of us to finish the challenge," he turned and told Harold, Zoey and Lindsay looking at them as well.

"Oh _yeah_ ," Lindsay said, looking over in the direction of the hook-bearing skull-rock.

"Don't you think we should at least wait until the others are free?" Harold asked his teammate.

"Hey, I thought you didn't _want_ to rescue them," Zoey asked in disbelief as the camera zoomed in on her and the two boys.

" _No_ ," Harold corrected, "I just didn't want to work with someone I can't _trust_ anymore."

"Excuse me, Harold?" Leonard interrupted, earning the attention and annoyance of both redheads. "Pardon the interruption, but the fair _Maggot Princess_ has already procured their final souvenir," he said, motioning to the side.

The camera panned to the skull-rock, revealing that Lindsay had already pulled a hook from it. "Woo! _Yeah_!" she cheered, excitedly giving the hook a kiss.

Harold and Zoey gasped. "Fear not, _I_ shall defeat her!" Leonard declared, pushing up his sleeves and running off towards the skull-rock as well.

"Wait, no, stop!" Courtney hurriedly called out from the web as she and the others watched Leonard pull a hook from the stone and hold it above him dramatically while Lindsay, still present, watched on. "You're gonna make us lose!" Courtney finished her objection.

Leonard huffed in annoyance. "No I'm _not_ ," he countered matter-of-factly. "I'm doing the opposite of that, just watch!" He quickly looked around, spotting a zipline tied to a nearby stalagmite that led down over an underground cliff. He smiled and ran towards it while the dramatic background music rose up, and after a few moments Lindsay gasped and chased after him.

The two managed to reach the start of the line at about the same time, but Leonard was just able to hook himself onto the line and took off just as Courtney cried out "Leonard, _NO_!"

Lindsay sent a nervous look backward, then hooked herself onto the line and jumped off as well.

" _No_...," Courtney whispered, a look of shock on her face. Next to her, Gwen was sweating and trembling with her lip bit and her eyes clenched shut. The camera panned over to Jasmine who was looking rather panicked as well, then to the ground as Harold and Zoey made moves to follow their teammates...

...until a sudden cry of "LET ME _OUT_ OF HERE ALREADY!" from Gwen and Jasmine shook the cavern, and startled the two redheads into turning back again.

The music picked up as they raced towards the cave walls and began to climb up, but the shot quickly cut to Cameron and the spider, then diminutive young man now jumping up and down on the mutant's back.

"Stop being such a bully!" he told it. "You can't hurt me anymore!" The shot cut to the stalactite the spider's line was attached to, the rock beginning to crack. "I mean it," Cameron continued, "get _lost_!"

With one final jump the silk line snapped, sending him and the spider to the floor and causing rocks to fall from the ceiling. Harold and Zoey coughed and dropped from the wall and those stuck in the web screamed as dust filled the air, and there was an ominous snap followed by thuds and grunts. The dust dissipated to reveal that all the captives – and indeed the web itself – had fallen to the cave floor.

Several groans filled the air as everyone tried to recover, the silken prisons beginning to unravel.

/

The scene cut to near-complete darkness, lit only by the eyes of some unknown creatures – and two known ones, based on their screams. Leonard and Lindsay zipped through the darkness screaming, and soon enough made it to the other side – a smaller tunnel in the side of a cliff face, with the zip line tied to the end of a small stalactite on an overhang just outside. Leonard arrived first and dropped when his hook slammed into the end of the line; Lindsay arrived moments later, and landed on top of the wizard when her hook slammed to a stop as well.

The shot panned down to them as they quickly shook away the effects of the impact and started to get to their feet. "Wow, I can't believe I really got here first!" the LARPer said, dusting off his robes.

"And _I'm_ surprised that both teams made it out," Chris chimed in, walking up from the left and looking the two over. "Mostly, anyway. Today's winning team iiiiss," he announced, pausing for effect as victorious music began to build, "the _Maggots_!"

Lindsay immediately squealed and clapped in victory, but Leonard just looked dumbfounded. "What?" he asked. "But I got here first!"

"True," the host admitted, "but remember when I said stick together, 'cause there'd be a penalty for each team member you lost?" He placed a hand on Leonard's shoulder, and said "Yeah, you lost five out of six while Lindsay only lost four out of _five_. So, the Maggots _totally_ win!"

"Woo hoo!" Lindsay cheered.

"But...but we each still only have one _member_ ," Leonard objected. "This isn't fair!"

"Hey, if you'd stayed behind and helped bring even _one_ more teammate with you, you'd have won even _with_ arriving second," Chris told him. "It's your fault for jumping the gun."

Leonard bit his lip in disbelief, then raised both hands and intoned "Time Reversal Spell!"

All that happened was that the music scratched to a halt and Chris and Lindsay gave him confused looks.

"Yeah, I knew that wouldn't work," Leonard said, hanging his head in depressed defeat.

/

The scene cut back to the cave as Cameron approached the camera coughing. He looked down as an eerie tune played, and gasped. "It can't be?!" The music rapidly grew more tense as the perspective inverted and the camera panned across what looked like a canister of artificial webbing, nuts and bolts and the tattered remains of a spider costume, and the all-too-familiar legs and torso and arms and groaning head of...

" _Izzy_!" Cameron exclaimed, getting the immediate attention of the other campers still nearby – as well as the unbound Fang, who promptly growled.

"Boo! Hahaha...," Izzy laughed, holding her head as she got to her feet. "Nice to have some fun with you guys again, but I gotta go!" she said, giving Cameron and the others a quick salute before running off into the caves, an angry Fang quickly chasing after her.

The other teens just watched them go with wide eyes and gaping mouths.

"... _huh_ ," Shawn said after a moment.

xxx

"Well, I guess I've been cured of my arachnophobia," Cameron told the confessional camera as he calmly allowed a small purple spider to descend down onto his finger. "Although now I'm _completely_ terrified of Izzy..," he added with a fretful look.

xxx

The scene cut to the six members of the Toxic Rats sitting by the campfire pit once again – Cameron and Courtney in the front row closest to Chris; Noah and Gwen roughly behind them; and Harold and Leonard on the far left.

"Looks like as hard as you tried, you just couldn't avoid coming back here for long," Chris taunted them as a few deep notes opened the background music. "A shame, too – you seemed to be doing so well for a minute there. But hey," he shrugged jovially, "I guess you just can't shake the loserdom that easily."

"Could you stop rubbing it in and get _on_ with it already?" Courtney asked.

"Yeah, and where's that brick wall of muscle and rage you call a chef?" Noah chimed in.

"Maybe the toxic marshmallows got him," Gwen suggested, earning a smirk from Noah.

" _Actually_ , Chef's out trying to catch Izzy again," Chris explained with a stern glare. "Luckily, we have a back-up," he added with a smile, turning to the side as a much shorter person in a hazmat suit arrived holding the usual strongbox in the usual tongs.

"Okay," Shawn said through the helmet, "this can _not_ have been in my contract for the episode."

"You'd be surprised," Chris told him plainly before smiling and turning back to the six campers. "Anyway, on to the votes! The following campers are _safe_ : Gwen. Noah. Cameron. And _Harold_."

One by one the four Rats were tossed their utterly ordinary marshmallows, until only Leonard and Courtney remained. With only empty seats between them the two immediately locked eyes, the LARPer sweating nervously under the former CIT's glare.

"And the Marshmallow of Toxic Loserdom goes to...," the host said as the elimination music rose up, " _Leonard_."

"Aww, really?" Leonard said in disappointment. "I thought I was really coming around to you guys."

"Well, it's not like we still don't like you," Cameron admitted.

"That little out-of-character chat earlier did win you some points," Noah added.

"But only with the _guys_ ," Courtney interrupted sternly. "Look, Leonard, I'm sure you're an okay and tolerable guy and all, but the thing is that _you_ cost us the challenge today, and we just can't justify keeping you around. So...no hard feelings, okay?"

"But...but I thought I had a secret ally!" Leonard added, standing up and fishing the note he'd received earlier out of his sleeve. "There was a note and everything!"

Noah leaned over and snatched the note from him, and read it with a bored expression. "Yeah, because you can _totally_ trust a mysterious note to have your back," he told his fellow nerd. "I mean, did you even get any follow-up from it?"

Leonard sighed and hung his head. "No..."

"Then I guess you're still going home," Gwen told him.

"I'll miss you, comrade in the world you magic and adventure," Harold stood and said, giving Leonard a sympathetic pat on the back.

/

The scene flashed to the Dock of Shame, Leonard already in the catapult's bucket with Chris, Shawn, and his former teammates standing nearby.

"Well, I guess this is goodbye," Leonard said. "May your quest for the Dragon's Eye bare many fruits, my friends. That's, uh, a Dwarvish saying meaning I hope you do well in competing for the million," he clarified.

The shot cut to the Rat boys, and Harold in particular, as they smiled and nodded. Leonard smiled and waved, and was promptly Hurled into the night with a scream.

Chris sighed happily. "I love doing that," he commented before clapping his hands in satisfaction, turning around, and freezing when he saw Shawn. "Oh yeah," he deadpanned, "I forgot you were still here."

"Look, am I getting paid for tonight or what?" Shawn asked.

Chris sighed in exasperation. "Well, seeing how you failed to catch the monster, which turned out to be one of this season's losers anyway...I'd say no! But," he smirked impishly, "I _am_ in a good mood right now, so I'll provide transportation off the island free of charge."

"Uhh...," Shawn said uncertainly, and a clockwipe put him in the bucket of the Hurl of Shame. "This isn't really what I was _hoping_ for..."

The shot cut out as a few footsteps were heard on the dock, revealing that the Rats had left and that Jasmine had just arrived.

"Oh hey, come to see me off?" Shawn asked with a smile.

"Yeah," Jasmine smiled back. "It was, y'know, nice to meet you. Maybe...we can see each other again sometime?"

"Yeah," Shawn smiled, "I think I'd like that."

Chris was shown pursing his lips and rubbing his chin in serious thought, then shrugged and smirked. "Well, that's enough of that," he said, pulling the catapult's lever and flinging the former contestant into the night with a startled scream.

"Wanna know who I'm gonna catapult off the island next?" he turned and asked the camera as the capstone theme began to play, Jasmine staring sadly at the sky behind him. "You'll have to come back and find out, right here on Total! Drama! _Revenge_ , of the _Island_!"

(Fade to Credits)

* * *

 **Author's Note - Post Script**

And thus we come to Leonard's elimination. I will admit, had it not been for the early swap last week he almost certainly would've been eliminated next week instead, but ultimately I figured it would work better if he was eliminated here in an almost tragic manner - not because he was annoying, but because even though he'd gained some friends he still messed up and cost them the challenge.

I hope the whole 'Leonard doesn't actually think he's a wizard, he was just deeply in character' thing doesn't, like, off-put anyone or anything. It's how I've intended to portray him from the start, since honestly the whole 'taking what was presented of him in canon at face-value and saying he's delusional but never really exploring what that would really mean' just seems like really lazy writing to me. Either figure out what it would really mean to have someone be legitimately delusional, or figure out some other way to explain his behavior like I have.

It may not all have been made explicit in the story, but this is how I think of the Shuffled version of Leonard: He;s a lot like Harold, in that he's a nerd with a penchant for the dramatic. But unlike Harold, Leonard is more specialized in his focus and is much less confident in himself outside of LARP. So while he likes Total Drama and wanted to get on the show, he didn't think his non-wizard self would be enough to get on, much less do well. But at some point, he came up with the idea that maybe if he applied while in-character, it would be enough - which it was, obviously. And once on the show, he figured he'd try to keep up the act for as long as he could, figuring that he'd be an early boot anyway. Because hey, if you know it's gonna happen, why not have some fun with it? So he basically decided to just roleplay in the game as a challenge, while also leaving an out for himself that he'd drop the act if someone asked him to in the right way. And even while he was in-character, he still tried to come up with ways for that part of him to mesh with the others and maybe get a little further in the game - his alliance with Izzy, toning down his spellcasting in a way that made sense in-character, and just generally trying to be helpful.

And personally, writing him like this has given me a greater appreciation for the dramatic little dork, and even knowing he was gonna be an early boot I enjoyed myself writing him, and I think maybe some of you readers enjoyed him as well. Ultimately, how well a character fares in the story depends a lot on the author's mindset in writing them - if you think they're annoying, they will be annoying. If you think they're pretty funny, then maybe that'll just rub off on them in text.

In a sense, Leonard is kind of like an inverted Mike - rather than someone with a serious psychological disorder that plays himself up like he's an actor, Leonard is an actor who people think has a serious psychological disorder.

Let's see, what else...well, the note thing will be brought up at a later time. I know it's a little cliche, but it's something I wanted to experiment with.

Izzy being the spider here just seemed to be so obvious a choice to me, and is part of the reason why I made her an early boot.

The second to last thing I want to mention right now is how the events of this episode ended up making me decide to move the Harold swap earlier. Well, basically, I figured that between the spider kidnappings and Shawn being around to distract her a bit, there's no way Justin would have been able to get Jasmine to vote out Harold, meaning there wouldn't be enough votes to get rid of the guy, meaning I'd either have to swap someone else (which would, in retrospect, have to be Leonard in order to get the two on the same team), or I'd have to move the swap earlier. Which, of course, it what I did.

And the last thing I want to mention? Well, _**there's an...interesting little poll on my profile that I'd like you all to check out and vote on. Note that I'm not gonna bind myself to the results, it's more a way for me to gauge the opinions of my readers.**_ Late edit: Apparently, Polls aren't visible on a profile by default, but I've fixed that so it should be up now.

Until next week, I look forward to hearing from all of you.

\- Fangren

* * *

 **Appendix: TSROTI Eliminated Contestants**

Cody - (13th Place)

Izzy - (12th Place | Still AWOL)

Leonard (11th Place)


	5. Chapter 5 - Backstabbers Ahoy!

**Author's Note**

Hello again, everybody! I hope you're all ready for this week's chapter - it and next week's have been...a little tough to write, admittedly, between trying to keep everything straight and figuring out exactly what I want from this set of characters, and just being distracted due to American politics. But I'm confident that it's turned out great so far, so even if tomorrow is the second Saturday in a row that I've had to work on this season I'm not worried.

On to the reviews!

 **Elizabeth Fire Ice Heart:** Thanks! But unfortunately, it isn't likely that I'll be covering The Ridonculous Race any time soon - I seriously need to get job-hunting and money-earning if I'm going to be able to really live my life, and that means less time for fanfic writing once I've gotten the main Shuffled series out of the way. But if I do ever cover RR...I'll probably keep Geoff and Leonard in, but I'm undecided about the Reality Pros.

 **Sarcasm is a Habit:** Great to hear it! I'm super glad that pretty much all of the reviewers have enjoyed my take on Leonard. I'm also glad you enjoyed the inclusion and portrayal of Gwen and Jasmine's fears, since even though they were such an obvious thing to have I was a tiny bit worried that since they weren't explicitly called out it would seem a little awkward or something. And as for the Courtney-Pearl comparison...I can kind of see it, but only just.

 **acosta perez jose ramiro:** Thanks! Yeah, I figured Courtney would be meticulous enough to pay attention to Chris' warning and figure out what it might mean, even if she was never able to outright say it. And I'm glad you're enjoying Lindsay doing well as well.

 **Gage the Hedgehog:** Thanks!

 **ashDanLand:** Cool, glad to hear that you're enjoying most of the cast and are even starting to kind of come around to Courtney? Anyway, I'm glad you enjoyed what I did with Leonard, and I hope you enjoy the rest of the season.

 **OMAC001:** Mmm, yeah, I think a lot of people expected Leonard to go soon but not what he'd do before hand, which makes me kind of happy. And as for the note...well, it'll be explained eventually.

 **moka evans:** It's kind of a shame that you wouldn't give Leonard more of a chance if you were writing him, but it's your choice. As for Justin...well, you'll find out what becomes of him soon enough. And don't worry about me dropping the season's main villain off too early, I have a pretty good idea about how I'm going to handle things on that front and will make sure the main villain lasts a proper amount of time.

 **Call Me Ishmael:** Haha, I'm glad you enjoyed Shawn and Jasmine so much, and Leonard's development too. Though as for why he was the one who went home last week...well, I just wanted to do some more with Lindsay and the others. I figured it was pretty much Leonard's time, he had a nice run and got developed, and there just wasn't much reason to keep him around. Sorry to disappoint, but that's just how I feel. Aside from that, I am glad you enjoyed last week's episode and I hope you'll do the same this time.

 **Animation Adventures:** Hahaha, wow, I never realized how shocking my interpretation of Leonard would be. Maybe it's just because I've had enough of a connection and understanding of roleplaying throughout my life that the whole distinction between In-Character and Out-Of-Character conduct just seemed so natural to me as something that would work with him. I don't know. Anyways, I'm glad you enjoyed Shawn's greater cameo, and as for Bridgette's this week...well, you'll see soon enough.

 **Guest #1:** Yup! And who knows what else will happen between them...

 **Guest #2:** Hah, yeah, a little self-awareness and go a long way with someone like Leonard. Noah being more of a pain-magnet than Harold has been mostly an unconscious choice, since I think part of me just gravitates more to putting Noah in that role. And yeah, Izzy's not someone who will show up all the time, but she will show up. The reason why she didn't fight Chef last week is just because I didn't really want to have such a confrontation then.

 **Glowing Insanity:** It's always high praise when someone likes my version of an episode that was a canon favorite more. And yeah, Leonard really didn't get the focus and development really needed in Pahkitew Island, and especially RR - but I kind of get why that was, in that the earliest boots aren't usually meant to be sympathetic. And to be honest, I figured Izzy would be most people's natural choice for the monster, considering she was already known to be loose on the island.

 **Explorer of the Unknown:** Hah, yeah, the poll-making was a learning experience for me as well. For some reason it didn't automatically show up on my profile, which seemed like an odd design choice but whatever. And to be honest, you pointing out the difference with Fang between canon and the Shuffledverse is making me smile. I knew coming in to the season that I wanted to shake things up with Fang, and having an inverted sort of relationship compared to canon just made so much sense, especially with Izzy around as an obvious choice to cause that inversion. She's completely different from Scott, and it's really showing. There's a lot of humor to be had in this relationship, I think.  
And yeah, you're pretty much spot-on with Leonard; he just needs to be treated like a real person with real reasons and insecurities behind his actions. Maybe his strategy isn't a winning one, but I don't think there's anything wrong with going on a show having low expectations, and trying to go out with style. And as for the note...well, keep in mind that when it was sent, everyone except Harold just thought of Leonard as the weird kid who thought he was a wizard. And even after gaining some of their respect, that may not have been enough for the note-maker to take his side given what else happened.  
As for the Maggots...well, there's so much I want to say here, but not much I can without spoiling things. I will say that I can certainly see Trent and Zoey bonding over old music, even if I never do get around to it in-story.  
And regarding the cast for All-Stars...well, keep in mind that I have to keep in mind that the people chosen are meant to be All-Stars, skilled and/or memorable players who really deserve the title. And with only 7 from the first 24 cast members getting in, it means a whole lot of people have to be cut even if they might deserve some more focus.

 **StayOuttaMyShed:** Awesome, I'm glad you're enjoying how things are being set up this season, especially Harold and Zoey. I'm really happy with what I've done with them and what I have in store, both as individuals and as a pair of friends. Like you said, Justin and Trent and Gwen and Courtney all took a backseat last week, but that was basically because I needed early captures, and with them out of the way it gave me a better chance to focus on Leonard and his interactions with the other Rat boys, and not to mention the Shawn and Jasmine and the Maggots girls in general. I guess canon really did try and make it seem like Leonard genuinely thought he was magical, but honestly my alternate interpretation of him is just so strong in my mind that I could easily see something like what I did happening in canon. And yeah, it is a shame that he had to leave right after his development, but sometimes that's just the time for a character to go.  
And yeah, haha, I do want a guy/guy ship in the Shuffledverse and TSPI seems like the best chance to do it. But since there's not a lot of guy/guy ships that I actually actively support, and not much really stood out to me when looking over the cast for that season, I figured I'd get some input from my fans. So, yeah, thank you for sharing your thoughts.

 **Knifez:** Glad you enjoyed the challenge! It was kind of fun writing another suspenseful horror-like challenge again after London. And honestly, considering Leonard's title is 'The LARPer', you'd think more reviewers wouldn't be surprised when he was revealed to, y'know, be a LARPer. I don't know. Anywya, I hope you enjoy the rest of the season!

 **FOWLKON;** Haha, yup! Even the strangest of characters can be easily developed if you just give them some thought and attention. I'm pretty happy with what I was able to do with Leonard this season overall, and even Lindsay too. I'll save the talk of possible relationships for some other time, though.

 **bruno14:** I'm happy you noticed Fang growling at the spider, it was one of the biggest hints that it was still gonna be Izzy. And also that you found Leonard's elimination to be sad, since it's another sign that I've really done good with his development. As for the gay pairing in TSPI...well, I think it would be easier to justify than you think since somebody liking girls in canon doesn't exclude them from also liking guys.

 **DSX62415:** Yeah, Izzy was probably the top guess for the spider monster, at least among those who mentioned it.

 **PizzaTheBomb:** Really? The idea of Shawn actually joining the game never really occurred to me. I am glad you enjoyed Leonard's exit, though, including the letter.

 **Ddynamo:** Haha, well, you've certainly been doing well so far, but only I know what'll happen next. Also, I'm glad you enjoyed how I played with the cameo last week; Izzy reprising her canon role as the spider just seemed so obvious and from there I figured why not have Shawn show up as well since Chris doesn't actually know what the spider's deal is. And I think it all worked out pretty well.

 **The Misguided Angel of Death:** Glad to know that I've gotten one more person to like Leonard and be sad to see him go! And yeah, Lindsay is developing better than I was expecting, I guess it was easier than I originally thought to bring out some of her more TDA-ish attributes. And as for Harold and Jasmine and Zoey...well, only time will tell.

 **VIPGuest:** Nah, Izzy staying for long isn't in the cards quite yet. And I am glad you liked Leonard here, even if you still also found him annoying. As for who I hate/like...well, I like nearly all of them, just for different reasons, so there's no easy answer there. As for hate...also hard to say. I guess maybe Amy? But that's more on a personal level, I can appreciate what she brings to the table as a character.

 **.netBUM:** Thanks! I'm glad you enjoyed Shawn and Jasmine, as well as Harold staying true to his canon self while also developing in a bit different way. And I agree, Zoey ended up way too focused on Mike in canon, which is why I'm staying away from giving her a love interest this season - she has other plot potential that I'd like to explore. And like I've said so often today, I'm glad that yet another person enjoyed my portrayal of Leonard.

 **Star Saber21:** Well, you weren't the only one who hadn't expected the team swap two weeks ago, though that was more because most expected it to be last week like in canon. Not much else to say, other than that I'm happy you're enjoying how things are turning out.

 **P. T. Piranha:** Right. Ultimately, it is the authors who control how likeable a character is, so if they go into writing thinking that someone is annoying and not worth keeping around, then that's what their work will reflect. But if they give a character a chance and explore them, then the readers will pick up on it and appreciate even the most loathed parts of the cast.

 **CVluvFoxy:** Thanks! Yeah, Fang's capture was meant to be a big hint that Izzy was still the spider, because most other options probably wouldn't have bothered. Not sure what else to say, other than that some things may be clearer after this week?

 **graveexcitement:** I gotta say, I'm really super happy with all the reviews you've been leaving, it always makes me so happy to hear from somebody who likes my stories. I'm glad you enjoyed TSA so much, as well as the resolution of the DJ/Dawn/Sammy love triangle in TSWT - like you said, polyamory is the best way to resolve those. I also enjoyed hearing that the second half of TSWT sucked you in. And yeah, your prediction of the cast distribution was pretty close, even if it was admittedly a fairly simple thing to guess at.  
And as for this season, well, I'm glad you're continuing to enjoy things. I kind of think of this season as a way to do a lot of TDA's plotlines better, since this story shares so much of its cast with canon's season two. So that's why I'm doing things like including Trent's superstitious side so early, and giving development to people like Lindsay and Harold and Justin and Courtney. And then it's also presented such a good opportunity to flesh out Leonard into a proper character, and explore some other sides of Zoey and Cameron and Noah and Jasmine...it's just a cast that I'm really happy about. And I'm proud of where I've been able to take them even in just this first half of the season.  
And as for the m/m ship in TSPI...well, it's something I've wanted to do for a while now, just never been sure exactly in which direction to take it. So having this poll and seeing all the responses has been pretty informative.

 **I. M. Poik:** Well, yes, I eliminated him early, but that doesn't mean I didn't develop him - you don't need to get far in the game to be fleshed out as a character. As for Izzy, well, there's other, better places to consider her re-entry - last week was way too early. And as you said, the season is still fresh, and even though it is technically nearing its halfway point there's still a lot to come.

 **Jaspher 4 Me:** I honestly don't see the appeal of Jasmine and Topher as a couple. They don't seem like each other's types at all. That aside, I'm happy you enjoyed Leonard's confession and Lindsay's just general demeanor. And I will admit that I do kind of regret not giving Gwen more of a chance to be in her element with the spookiness, but ultimately I needed the boys to last longer so I could give them the focus I wanted.

 **The Prime Writer:** Yeah, sorry, I've been super busy/distracted by politics - I'll respond to your thoughts about the TSPI cast either tonight or tomorrow.  
As for this season, I'm glad you're enjoying things so far. I've met my goal of developing Leonard into a proper character and not just an easy early boot; and Courtney is having to deal with her inner (and outer) conflicts. Speaking of conflict, Izzy's conflict with Fang (and to a lesser extent Chef) is definitely going to continue, and while I don't have it all planned out just yet I'd say it's safe to say things will get more physical at some point. And regarding Harold's anger towards Zoey...well, I can see your point, though I do still think Harold would be reluctant to agree to what Zoey said then and there.  
With Trent and especially Jasmine, I've definitely been trying to make their insecurities a little clearer. They're both, I think, great characters, and showcasing their weaknesses just makes them all the better. And as for Chef talking more than in canon, the reason I decided to do that goes a bit beyond just the fact that it made sense. It might seem weird, but I figured that since Leonard was in this season and that him and Chef share a voice actor, that Chef should thus be able to speak more. I don't know, it's weird, but it makes sense to me.

 **link9753:** Glad to hear it! Like so many others, I'm happy you enjoyed both Shawn's cameo and Leonard's development an departure. As for Duncan/Zoey as a ship...well, though I can see it happening, I don't know if I'd actually try to do it in the Shuffledverse had I had the chance. Not only would all their other love interests need to be absent, but I'd also have to want to put Zoey in a relationship, and after what happened in canon I'm a little wary to do so.

And that's it for the week! The **_poll in my profile will remain up for the time being,_** and as always **_a TVTropes page for this series exists_** , and as per usual with such things, could always use more work. I thoroughly appreciate those who've already been working on it, and look forward to seeing what you all add next.

The teams as they stand now are as follows:

Toxic Rats: Cameron, Courtney, Gwen, Noah, Harold

Mutant Maggots: Jasmine, Justin, Lindsay, Trent, Zoey

Could treachery be afoot this week? Read on, find out, and enjoy.

\- Fangren

* * *

 **Episode 5 – Backstabbers Ahoy!**

"Last time, on Total Drama Revenge of the Island!" Chris opened, the standard shot of the island quickly cutting to a clip of the campers hurriedly assembling in the common area between cabins as the recap montage began. "Eleven campers went on a scavenger hunt," a close-up of the screen that showed the scavenger hunt locations was next, "that was _spoo~ky~_!" he said in an appropriate tone, several scary eyes opening up in the hollow of a tree. "And very, very, _painful_ ," he added with a laugh as Courtney was shown getting choked by the squid-tree while some of her teammates threw rocks at both her and the tentacle, and Noah ran right into a minefield and got blown up.

"Classic competitor Shawn dropped by to help take care of a _little_ spider problem," the host continued over shot of the veteran survivalist's entrance, then the sudden abductions of Courtney, Justin, and Trent. "But all he _actually_ managed to do was chat with Jasmine a bit," the two were shown talking in both the pet cemetery and outside the spooky cave, "aaaand then get captured by the spider _himself_ ," Shawn's abduction was shown next. "Which, as it turned out, was actually _Izzy_ in disguise." The redhead's reveal was shown, as was her subsequent departure with an angry Fang hot at her heels. "Guess that explains where that spider costume we ordered went..."

"Anyway, Leonard the Wizard proved he really _did_ have his head screwed on right," the LARPer was shown taking off his hat and beard and speaking out-of-character with his male teammates, "only to _immediately_ mess up and cost his team the challenge," he was shown leaving his captured team behind to chase after Lindsay, then getting informed he'd lost the Rat the challenge, "aaand get booted off the island." Leonard's elimination was shown, complete with his protestations and reveal of the note and ending his his catapult ride into the night while Chris laughed.

"Who will ride the Hurl of Shame next?" the host asked as the montage ended to show him standing on the Dock of Shame. "How many times can I laugh at _them_ , before _then_? Find out right now, on Total! Drama! Revenge of the Island!"

xxx

(Fade to Opening Theme)

 _Dear Mom and Dad, I'm doin' fine;_

 _You guys are on my mind!_

 _Ya asked me what I wanted to be,_

 _And now I think the answer is plain to see!_

 _I wanna be...famous!_

 _I wanna live close to the sun!_

 _Well pack your bags, 'cause I've already won!_

 _Everythin' to prove, nothin' in my way;_

 _I'll get there one day._

 _'Cause I wanna be...famous!_

 _(Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

 _I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

 _I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

(Fade to Episode)

xxx

A dramatic note and a shot of the morning sun opened the episode, a flock of geese flying across the sky in formation in the distance. The scene cut to the boys of the Rats' cabin, the camera angled to show all three sound asleep in their beds – Noah and Harold on top, and Cameron cocooned below Harold.

The shot cut in close to Harold as he began to murmur in his sleep. "Why of course, Jasmine...I'd _love_ to take a walk with you...," he began happily before suddenly stiffening up. "Wait, what is _he_ doing here? You know _Justin_ doesn't like mutant _bobsledding_...wait...why...no! _No_! NO!" The music rapidly turned intense as Harold bolted awake with a start, screaming and flailing and tumbling off his bed with his sheet and landing on the floor with a thud.

"Uggh, what is it _now_?" Noah asked groggily, putting a hand on his head as he sat up.

Cameron, seemingly already wide awake, stuck his head out of his cocoon. "I think he was having a nightmare," he answered plainly.

"Doesn't he have enough of those whenever we have a _challenge_?" Noah asked dryly.

"Sorry, guys," Harold told them, now on his feet but somewhat tangled up in his bedding. "It's this _Justin_ thing, I just can't get over how he managed to seduce Jasmine and Zoey to the _dark_ side."

"Dude, that happened _days_ ago," Noah replied, now sitting on the edge of his bed. "If you can't get over it then at least channel your _angst_ into kicking their butts." He hopped off to the floor, then started getting dressed.

"Noah's right," Cameron said as Harold turned his gaze to the right. "We should focus on trying to win today's challenge. That way it's possible that Justin goes home next instead of one of us."

xxx

"Harold being on our team gives us a distinct intellectual advantage over the Maggots," Cameron told the confessional. "And as we already proved last time, he works fairly well with Noah and I. All I'm worried about now is whether the girls can accept him, as Courtney is still _veeery_ hard to please."

xxx

"I'm actually feeling pretty good about my new teammates," Harold said with a grin. "Sure we lost last time, but at least _these_ guys haven't _betrayed_ me." He hung his head and sighed dramatically. "I just wish I didn't have to go up against Trent...if my new team wins, he might go home next. If only there was some way to get the girls to see how awful _Justin_ is," he said with an angry glower.

xxx

"Yeah, Harold's annoying," Noah told the outhouse camera, "but if I can tolerate _Leonard_ , I can tolerate _anyone_. Besides, the guy's been pretty eager to fill us all in on what's going on with the _Maggots_. Seems that slab of hot man-meat _Justin_ could end up being a threat in the future, unless the Maggot girls stop falling for his pretty-boy act."

xxx

The scene cut outside the Maggots' cabin, the voice of Lindsay rising up over it as she said "Okay, so, that was when my sister Paula _totally_ realized that the hair dye she'd been using was not only giving her split ends, but it wasn't even the right _color_." As she spoke, the shot cut inside to show Lindsay happily brushing her long blonde hair while Zoey sat on a bed behind her back looking rather uncertain. "And so after Paula _freaked out_ for like _two hours_ my mom finally figured out how to fix everything, and so Paula didn't have to wear a hat all the time. And ever since then, we've been _really_ careful about dying our hair."

"Uh...okay...," Zoey said slowly, looking rather bewildered. "That's...good to know?"

"Well duh," Lindsay said with a happy smile, walking over and examining a lock of Zoey's hair. "You're lucky yours is so good. Well, aside from the color anyway."

"Hey, I _like_ my hair color," Zoey said, recoiling in offense. "And besides, I was _asking_ about how you feel about _Justin_."

Lindsay stared at her blankly for a moment. "Ohhh, _thaaaat_ ," she finally said in realization. "Well, I kinda hate to say it, but I think he likes _me_ more. No offense."

Zoey just groaned and palmed her face.

xxx

"Lindsay's... _sweet_ ," the indie girl confessed, "but she's just so hard to _talk_ to. I wish Jasmine slept in the cabin with us, I'm really having doubts about this whole _Justin_ thing. Maybe I can ask Trent for some advice?"

xxx

A pleasant tune played as the scene moved to a shot of the lake, a few red birds flying and tweeting past the camera. The perspective inverted to show Gwen sitting on one of the stump seats of the bonfire pit, drawing something on a sketchpad.

"Hey, wasn't expecting to see you up here so early," Trent said, walking up from the right and immediately attracting Gwen's attention. "You don't really strike me as a morning person."

"I'm not," Gwen smiled, "but I figured it was better to just accept getting up early."

"Yeah, it's not like Chris is gonna let us have much sleep anyway," Trent laughed, taking a seat on a stump next to Gwen's.

"Exactly," Gwen joined in.

"So...what're you drawing?" the musician asked, looking over at the goth's sketchpad.

"Oh, it's nothing...," Gwen said bashfully, "just the lake. Figured I might as well do _something_ , y'know?"

"Totally," Trent smiled. "I probably would've been practicing my guitar had Justin not yelled at me for disturbing his 'beauty sleep' again." He rolled his eyes as he made air quotes.

Gwen smiled impishly. "Wow, sounds like he's a worse roommate than _Courtney_."

"Tell me about it," Trent said. "And the worst part is he's got all the girls wrapped around his finger. If my team loses again, I don't know if I can avoid getting voted out."

"Wow, that sucks," Gwen frowned. "I wish I could help, but, I mean, it's not like I can just throw the challenge or anything."

"Yeah, I know," Trent said, looking downward. "But hey, don't worry, I'll figure something out. Maybe I can find that Chris-head thing, or convince the girls..."

"I'd go with the _second_ one first," Gwen told him, smiling off to the right. "If only because we have company." She pointed off towards the clearing's entrance, and the shot zoomed out to show Zoey walking up, nervously rubbing her arm as she did so.

"Oh hey, good morning Zoey," Trent greeted, standing up with a calm smile.

"Morning guys," Zoey replied. "Trent, can I...speak to you in private?" Her eyes briefly darted towards Gwen, and the goth stood up and smiled.

"Well, I'll leave you two _Maggots_ to talk," she told the two, putting her arm on Trent's shoulder and smiling at the redhead. "Have fun!" she said with an impish wink and finger pistol at Trent before walking away.

After she'd left, Trent looked back at Zoey. "So, what's up?" he asked.

"It's, umm, about Justin," the redhead admitted, causing Trent's brow to shoot up. "I'm kinda worried that I gave in too easily when he asked me to vote off Harold. But I don't really know what I can even _do_ about it right now."

Trent nodded, then smiled softly. "Well, maybe if you keep your distance from him you'll be able to clear your head a bit. And then I bet you'll have a better understanding of who you can _really_ count on."

"I hope so," Zoey said anxiously.

/

A flash took the scene back to the Maggots' cabin as Justin walked up its steps with a light blue bathrobe on and a fluffy towel around his hair. He opened the door, and the camera followed him inside.

"Ahh," he sighed happily, "all alone. No obnoxious Harold, and no distracting music from Trent. It's almost like having my own personal trailer!" he joked, laughing as he walked over to his bed. "A really _crappy_ trailer, but still," he added as an afterthought.

He reached under the pillow of his lower-right bunk and pulled out a hairbrush...and a letter along with it. "This is strange, I wasn't expecting any fan-mail until _after_ the season was over," he said, raising an eyebrow as he picked up the letter and opened it up.

"To the best-looking guy on the island," he read, his voice becoming higher and tenser as he continued on. "I'm afraid that you might be in trouble. It might seem hard to believe, but I have good reason to think that you can't trust Lindsay – I mean, nobody's _that_ stupid, right? She's just playing dumb to get in good with the other Maggots, and if you guys lose again she'll convince them to vote you off. You can't let that happen – you're much too gorgeous to lose.

With love, your friend on the Rats

P. S. - I'm sorry for not delivering this in person, but I don't want my teammates finding out."

Justin lowered the page, looking rather stunned.

xxx

"Okay, I'm not saying I'm gonna just _believe_ a piece of paper," Justin confessed, holding the note between two fingers, "but I _should_ probably look into this. I mean, I'm sure I have Lindsay and the other girls wrapped around my little finger, but how do I _really_ know that they're gonna do what I say when I'm not around? I need to make sure she isn't spending too much time with the _others_."

xxx

A loon called as the scene moved to the Mess Hall, cutting inside as a few soft and plodding notes played.

Jasmine, Trent, Zoey, and Lindsay were seated at the forward table this time around, while the five Rats had been forced to claim the table closer to the kitchen. All of them were eating what appeared to be trays of mostly meat – bacon and roast chicken and some kind of intestines, with a bit of mashed potatoes and an apple on the side.

Justin walked up to the meal counter with his tray ready, but rather than look at Chef he watched his teammates from afar – they appeared to be chatting amicably, with Lindsay as the center of attention.

The model narrowed his eyes in mild suspicion until the gruff voice of Chef Hatchet snapped him back to attention. "Move along, pretty boy," the hulking man said, and the model finally noticed that his tray had been filled with the morning's meaty breakfast.

Justin got moving again and the scene skipped ahead to him arriving at the Maggots' table, where he quickly slid into place next to Lindsay. "Morning, Linds," he greeted with a smile that immediately got her attention. "What are you, uh, talking about?" he asked her, putting an arm around her shoulder and briefly looking at the rest of their teammates – Jasmine looking wary and Trent looking annoyed on the opposite side of the table from him; and Zoey watching with an uncertain expression next to Lindsay.

"Oh, not much, just things like high school and what we might do if we lose again," Lindsay answered nonchalantly, her brow furrowing when she saw Justin's eyes widen.

"Really?" the supermodel asked with a hint of nervousness. "What brought on the group strategy session?"

"We just wanted to make sure nobody has to go home if they don't deserve it, man," Trent told him.

"Yeah," Jasmine chimed in. "We're not really sure if voting of Harold the other day was the right call."

"Wow, that's, uh, reassuring," Justin said, even more nervous than he was before and even dropping his arm off Lindsay's shoulders.

"Sorry we didn't wait for you to get here before we started," Zoey told him.

Justin looked like he wanted to say something, but before he could he was interrupted by the whine of the intercom and the voice of Chris McLean.

"Attention campers!" the host announced. "Breakfast is cutting in to precious time that you could spend getting injured!" The shot cut to the loudspeaker outside as Chris laughed. "Grab your swimsuits and meet me at the dock, _pronto_!"

The campers, who'd already gathered in the middle of the lodge, began to groan and complain. "You have ten seconds to exit the Mess Hall," Chris added, "before I release... _The_ _Raccoon_!"

"The _raccoon_?" Courtney repeated in disbelief, and the ten teens started to laugh as the camera pulled back and a large crate was lowered down from the ceiling on chains. It stopped just before it hit the floor, and the campers immediately looked at it with dread.

The front face of it was punched off, revealing the giant mutant raccoon inside. It roared, and with a shriek the two teams fled the building.

/

The scene cut outside to the campers catching their breaths, Chris watching them nearby with an impish smile.

"What's the deal sending that thing after us?" Jasmine asked him. "Some of us could've been seriously hurt!"

Chris just laughed. "Nah, only if you got between him and food. Good thing none of you stayed back for seconds."

"Yeah," Courtney deadpanned, the others looking similarly annoyed.

/

The footage flashed ahead to the two teams assembled on the Dock of Shame in their swimsuits – Maggots on the left, Rats on the right, Chris in the middle. Each team also had an old-fashioned diving suit connected by hose to a hand pump lying between them and the host.

"Alright," Chris began, "here to help us get today's competition underway, say hello to our classic competitors, _Geoff_ and _Bridgette_!"

He motioned to the side and the camera zoomed out as the cowboy-hatted partier and the wetsuit-wearing surfer arrived at the dock in a patched-up red canoe.

"What's up, dude," Geoff greeted the group on the dock.

"Let's get this over with," Bridgette chimed in irritably. "Remember," she told her boyfriend, "our contracts said _demonstration only_."

"Relax," Chris smiled, "no demo needed! Just chum the water and try not to get eaten."

Bridgette narrowed her eyes in suspicion, and Geoff reached into the canoe and picked up a bucket of green slop. He took one whiff of it and retched. "Whoa, man, what _is_ this stuff?" he asked in disgust.

"Leftovers," the host grinned. "From last season."

The two lovers shuddered, and in doing so Geoff slopped a bit of chum onto the edge of the canoe.. "Well, I can see your _standards_ haven't gotten any better," Bridgette commented.

"Hey, my standards are _high_ ," Chris countered, taking offense.

It was then that Fang rose out of the water and chomped down on the end of the boat, devouring the bit of chum that had been spilled on it and forcing Geoff to yelp and dart over to Bridgette.

"See? _Fang_ likes it," Chris said.

" _So_ not cool," Bridgette muttered in shock.

"Challenge, part one!" the host moved on. "Each team must get a pair of water-skis in an _underwater mission_." The shot cut underwater as he spoke, showing two sets of water skis tied to a pair of rocks on the lake bed. A school of vicious, spiny fish swam past from the right to the left, and a second later a school of eels passed through from the opposite direction. "Or drown trying," the host added as the camera zoomed in on the skis.

"One victim-I mean _camper_ ," Chris continued with a sly look, "will snag the skis in an old-school diving suit," he held up the Rats' suit, "and float them to the surface while the rest of their team pumps them oxygen," he held up the Maggots' pump. "First team to surface their skis wins, and gets an advantage in part two."

/

The music turned tense as the focus moved to the Maggots, Jasmine standing before her teammates. "Alright, I'm not gonna even _bother_ trying to get inside this thing," she held up their diving suit, "so one of you will have to do it."

"Ooh! How about Justin?" Lindsay suggested with much enthusiasm.

"Huh? Why me?" the supermodel asked in surprise.

"You _are_ the second-strongest one here, man," Trent said with a small smile.

"True," Zoey nodded. "You can probably get to the skis fastest."

"Wait, girls, what if I don't _wanna_ do this?" Justin asked in disbelief, his nervousness showing in his smile as he looked from Jasmine to Zoey to Lindsay.

"Aww, c'mon, Justin, _please_?" Lindsay pleaded, pouting and clasping her hands and making puppy-dog eyes at the model.

"Sorry, mate," Jasmine smiled, dropping the diving helmet over the model's head. "Looks like we've decided."

The focus moved to the Rats, Courtney at the center of their attention. "Okay," she told her teammates, "does anybody _want_ to dive?"

"I'd like to give it a shot," Harold volunteered.

"...really?" Courtney asked skeptically. "You want us to rely on _you_ for this."

"Need I remind you that I did the best out of any of us last time?" Harold said, stepping forward and lifting up the diving helmet. "And if you still want me to prove my loyalty and usefulness to the team, then just let me volunteer."

Courtney pursed her lips and hummed. "Well...if you _insist_...," she finally said.

"Thank you." Harold added as he put the helmet on, and his cheesy grin showed through the glass. "Mostly because this is just so gosh darn _cool_!" he gushed excitedly.

xxx

"Uggh, Harold is such a _loser_ ," Courtney griped to the confessional camera. "But if he wants to put himself out there, then I guess I shouldn't complain. Either he proves his worth or he gives us an easy target, it's pretty much a win-win for me."

xxx

"Ready?" Chris asked, now standing between Justin and Harold, the two boys now fully dressed in their diving suits. Justin smirked confidently at his opponent, while Harold scowled right back, and with a rise in the music and a sharp "GO!" from the host, the two were off.

The shot immediately cut underwater as the two splashed down and sank to the lake bed, the music deep and tense. The perspective moved behind them as they looked ahead to the tied-up skis in the distance, and after sharing a brief glance the two boys raced off...rather slowly through the water, thanks to the heavy suits and water pressure. They kicked up air bubbles and small clouds of sand with each step they took through the rock-and-trash-littered landscape, and the camera focused in on Harold as he suddenly stopped as though his hose had been caught on something.

He looked back and the camera panned to follow, revealing Fang holding back the dweeb's hose with a single hand. He grinned toothily, and Harold screamed.

The tense music cut out as the scene moved back above the water, focusing on the Rats. Courtney was currently pumping with Gwen and Noah flanking her, and Cameron leaning off the edge of the dock to watch Harold's progress.

"Hey, you're not getting tired already, are you?" Noah asked the former CIT in an almost condescending voice as her breathing became heavier.

"I can take over for you if you want," Gwen added more sincerely.

"I do _not_ need help on this," Courtney countered irritably, screaming out a battlecry and pumping more furiously so that the hose started bulging as air pockets moved down it.

The music picked back up as the scene cut back to Fang swimming viciously at Harold; the dweeb had stopped and closed his eyes, swinging around an arm with a rising cry of "Haaaaiii..."

On " _YA_!" he chopped at Fang as he approached, just as the bulging air pocket moved through the hose towards him...tugging him to the side just in time for both strikes to miss, causing Fang to ram into a rock while he looked back in confusion.

"Goooooo Justin!" Lindsay cheered excitedly as the camera cut back above the water, the blonde kneeling at the edge of the Maggots' half of the dock.

"Yeah, don't mess up...," Trent added halfheartedly behind her.

The camera panned away from them and on to Zoey and Jasmine, the latter operating the pump while the former talked to her...absentmindedly standing on the hose while doing so.

"Okay, I _really_ think we need to so something about Justin," the indie girl said.

" _Absolutely_ ," Jasmine replied, looking up at her teammate. "We never should've let him talk us into _anything_."

"I know," Zoey hung her head sadly. "I regret ever joining his _alliance_."

"Wait, you joined an _alliance_ with him?" Jasmine asked in shock, to which Zoey glumly nodded. "Wow, that's worse than I thought."

"It seemed like a good idea at the _time_ ," Zoey defended herself, anxiously rubbing her arm.

"I'm sure it did," Jasmine told her. "But it's not a good idea _now_ , so you should probably just forget about it."

"But-" Zoey tried to say before Jasmine sternly cut her off.

"No buts," she said. "People who use their looks to get their way are bad news; if you try to keep your promise to Justin he's just gonna use it against you." As she spoke, the camera focused down on the slowly-growing bulge in the hose, trapped from moving onward by Zoey's weight.

The intense music returned as the shot cut back underwater, Justin eagerly approaching the water skis...until he suddenly gasped, stopped, and held his breath with a look of shock. He frantically started tugging on his hose, and the scene returned to the edge of the dock as the other end of the hose began to yank and twang.

Jasmine quickly noticed it, and moved her wide gaze up the hose to Zoey's feet. "Wait, have you been standing on the hose this whole time?" she asked.

"Huh?" Zoey asked, looking down in confusion.

" _MOVE_!" Jasmine shouted, causing the redhead to yelp and jump back off the hose, allowing the air pocket to finally rush down the hose.

Back underwater Justin's face had started to lose a bit of color as he kept on tugging at the hose. The air bubble finally reached him, and he let out a sigh of relief...followed by another gasp as he saw Harold approaching with a confident grin.

"Oh jeez, I hope I didn't just mess things up for him," Zoey said with great concern as the camera once again cut back to her and Jasmine. "I'm not sure I wanna be in an alliance with him but that doesn't mean I want him to _choke_."

"Wait, what?" Lindsay asked with great concern as the camera zoomed out, showing her and Trent watching nearby. "Justin's _choking_?"

"No no," Zoey said, quickly waving her hands as the blonde rushed over and stood over the air hose, "Justin's fine. There was just a...a _problem_ , but we already fixed it."

"Oh...," Lindsay said blankly. "Well, good! At least you fixed it, and that's what matters. I mean, can you imagine how _awful_ it would be without Justin around?"

Trent, Zoey, and Jasmine just looked at her awkwardly.

xxx

"Wow, Lindsay's _really_ in to Justin," Trent told the outhouse camera. "I get the feeling she's not gonna wanna go against him, but that just means I have to try _harder_ to get the girls to see Justin doesn't really care about them. I mean, how else am I gonna stay in the competition?"

xxx

The static cut away to the Rats, Courtney huffing and puffing as she continued to pump air at a fast pace.

"Wow, great job wearing yourself out in the first half of the challenge," Noah said dryly. "I'm sure it won't come back to bite us in the _second_ part."

"I...can keep... _going_!" Courtney huffed determinedly, staring straight ahead.

"Actually, I think it _would_ be better if you took a break," Cameron suggested. "We don't know what the next part is, so for all we know we'll need your stamina _there_ more than we need it _here_ to win the advantage."

"We'll win the advantage _and_ I'll have plenty of stamina to spare, just watch!" Courtney declared, clenching her eyes and teeth as she continued to pump. Her breathing rapidly became more labored though, and after a second she started to wobble.

"Yeah, I'm taking over," Gwen said, stepping up and pushing Courtney to the side with one hand. The somewhat exhausted young woman was caught by a startled Noah, and Gwen started pumping. "Okay Harold, you _better_ make this worth it," she said to the water.

/

The music rose sharply as the scene flashed back underwater where Justin and Harold were now wrestling, the supermodel having gotten his former teammate in a headlock "Just give up, man, you know you can't win this," Justin said as the dweeb continued to struggle.

"Let me go already, _friend-stealer_ ," Harold retorted, just before he looked to the side and gasped – the camera quick-panned to the right to show Fang rapidly approaching again, this time with his jaws wide. Justin screamed as well, and let go of Harold just as the dweeb managed to step in front of him. Fang rammed into the boys from behind, sending the smaller nerd farther forward while the larger model instinctively tried to keep the mutant's jaws from closing on him.

Harold quickly, if somewhat accidentally, capitalized by getting to the Rats' skis first; with the diving suit on he couldn't untie the ropes binding them to the rock but as it turned out just trying was enough to dislodge them; seconds later the two skis floated up to the surface.

A ship's horn was blown, and Chris called out "The Rats _win_ the first challenge!" over the shot of the skis.

The music suddenly turned harsh again as the camera zoomed out and Justin burst out of the water with Fang following slightly after. The mutant shark quickly grabbed the model's air hose and used it to pull him up before he could sink back down, then with a vicious grin he twirled the suited boy around in the air like a bolas until the hose snapped and Justin was sent flying.

He landed on the edge of the docks with a groan, and was quickly hauled out of the water by Trent and Jasmine.

"Aww, bad news Justin, we _lost_!" Lindsay spoke up, still standing with Zoey in front of the pump.

"Yeah, I figured," the model replied as he took off his diving helmet and cast a suspicious look at the air hose – the camera panned down and zoomed in, revealing that Lindsay was now standing on it.

xxx

"Wait, was _Lindsay_ the reason why I ran out of air for a few seconds down there?" Justin asked in thoughtful confusion. "It _couldn't_ be...but if she was standing on the hose, then maybe...? Maybe that note _is_ on to something..."

xxx

The music leveled off again as the scene moved to the Rats, Cameron and Courtney and Noah all helping to haul Harold up out of the water.

"I _knew_ I could do it," he said with a cheesy grin after his helmet was pulled off.

"Yup," Gwen said, stepping away from the pump with a small smile. "And now that you have, _I_ can take a break." She walked off down the dock rubbing her sore arms, and quickly met up with Trent coming from the other way.

"Hey, congratulations," he told her as a pleasant tune played.

"Thanks," she replied. "Hey, I was gonna take a quick walk before _Chris_ shows up," she asked as the camera focused in on their faces, "You wanna come with?"

"Sure," Trent smiled, and the two turned to walk up the dock together...until the grinning host popped up in front of them.

"Sorry, kids," he told them gleefully as he pushed between them to the front-center of the dock, "but right now it's time to announce the results. The Rats are the first to grab water skis, and their reward?" he said as a triumphant tune started playing and a light-skinned female intern with a black ponytail drove a speedboat up to the Rats' side of the dock. "A McLean Brand Speedboat to use in part two of the challenge."

"Yes!" Courtney said, pumping her fist in excitement.

"Awesome," Harold chimed in, the rest of their teammates smiling.

"And for the _Maggots_ ," Chris turned to the losers, a spluttering engine attracting their attention to the lake as well as the southeast Asian male intern drove up an inflatable boat to the left side of the dock. "A totally leaky _dinghy_!"

The five Maggots groaned and hung their heads in disappointment.

"Well...maybe we can still win this, right Justin?" Lindsay told her teammates.

"Yeah, so long as none of us tries to sabotage the team," he said with a pointed and hostile look at the Lindsay which bewildered the blonde.

"Sabotage?" Lindsay asked, her brow furrowed in confusion. "What do you mean?"

"I mean that _somebody_ tried to cut off my air while I was down there," Justin said, still glaring at Lindsay.

"Oh, sorry," a sudden and anxious voice caught his attention, and he turned his glare to Zoey who had raised her hand. "And I mean _really_ sorry. It was an accident, I _swear_."

Justin looked taken aback by this, but quickly narrowed his eyes again and said "...if you say so."

"Part _two_ of the challenge," Chris interrupted, briefly holding up two fingers as he continued his exposition, "a death-defying _water ski race_! The goal? Be the first to ring four bells on these four _totally harmless_ buoys."

As he spoke, the shot cut first to one of the bells, then zoomed out to show it – and the other floating nearby – were attached to the top of what were very obviously sea mines. Geoff and Bridgette arrived just then, the party boy frantically bailing out water while the surfer nervously paddled their canoe up to one of the mines. They bumped into it just as Chris proclaimed its harmlessness, and both cameos and canoe were blown away by the resulting explosion.

Geoff, singed and screaming, crashed head-first into an actual buoy but quickly grabbed onto it. "Dude, that was _wild_ ," he said with shell-shocked awe.

Chris laughed. "Make that three bells," he corrected as a screaming Bridgette landed on the dock beside him. " _See_?" he told the slightly-charred young woman. "You _totally_ got to demo the challenge."

Bridgette coughed out a bit of soot. "Yeah, I did. And honestly, I'm glad I'm not on this season."

The host laughed again, then looked at the camera. "Who will cry for their mommy? And who's cries will be drowned out by _explosions_?" he asked with a wide smile. "Find out when we return." He looked down at Bridgette, who coughed out a little more soot.

(Fade to Commercial and Back)

"Before the break," Chris said over a shot of the speedboat, the perspective a rare side-view of the end of the dock, "the rats got dibs on a _sweet_ speedboat. Which, they'll need." The camera panned on to the winning team standing confidently in their bathing suits, and Gwen and Noah shared a quick low-five.

"Meanwhile," the camera panned to the left past the host and onto the other team, "the Maggots are stuck dodging water mines," the shot kept panning from the glum-looking losers onto their vessel, "in a leaky dinghy that couldn't float in a kiddie pool." True to the host's word, the inflatable boat appeared to have already taken on a little bit of water.

"Choose three campers to water ski, one to drive, and one to operate your gull cannon," Chris continued.

"Wait, did you say _gull cannon_?" Gwen asked in disbelief.

"Yeah, you heard me," Chris said with a mischievous grin, taking out a remote control, pointing it at the boats, and pressing its single button. With a mechanical whir two identical turrets rose up from the two vessels; multi-barreled things with small sights and a large glass tank on top containing three unusually snake-like gulls.

"Wow, what video game did you steal _those_ from?" Noah quipped from off-screen.

"Each team gets _three_ chances to shoot the bells," Chris explained, ignoring the comment. "Or the other team. _Especially_ the other team," he grinned darkly.

"This seagull looks abnormal," Cameron said, kneeling down at the edge of the dock to get a closer look at his team's cannon.

"Ohhh, _that's_ not a seagull," the host said. "These babies are _half_ seagull, _half_ rattlesnake, all with paralyzing venom."

Cameron turned his attention back to the glass tank and tapped on the side of it until one of the call screeched at him, baring its fangs and causing the bubble-boy to recoil with fright.

Chris laughed. "Whichever team rings the most bells, _wins_!"

"Ooh, I'll drive!" Zoey quickly suggested, looking at Jasmine next to her. "If that's okay with everybody."

"Fine with me," the taller girl said. "I'll man the cannon, I reckon I'm a pretty crack shot."

The two girls walked forward past their teammates, Trent looking somewhat wary while Justin narrowed his eyes and glanced at a smiling Lindsay.

"Well boys," the blonde said, grabbing the arms of the boy on either side of her, "looks like we're skiing. Which is great, because I always _wanted_ to be the top of a water skiing pyramid!"

"Wait, why do _you_ get to be the top?" Justin asked with a troubled expression. " _I_ wanna be on top!"

"Really?" Lindsay asked. "But you're so much _heavier_ than I am. Besides, I think I might be on a roll with good ideas today and I don't really wanna stop."

"Sorry, dude," Trent said, putting a hand on the model's shoulder, "but I'm with Lindsay, and _we're_ on the bottom." Lindsay nodded and walked off, Trent followed her, and Justin was left looking rather startled.

The focus cut over to the Rats as Noah sat down in the driver's seat. "I'll take the wheel," he said confidently, pulling a lever and turning on the engine.

"And _I'll_ take the cannon," Courtney said, the camera panning over to her taking control of the boat's weapon. "I have a steady hand _and_ good eyesight, it's only natural."

"So...we're skiing then?" Gwen said, raising an eyebrow and the water skiis while Cameron hesitantly picked up the tow line's handle.

" _Awesome_ ," Harold smiled and nodded. "I'm pretty good at balancing things, so just leave that to me."

Chris smiled, then blew an airhorn to signal the start of the challenge. The Rats' speedboat immediately started moving, causing Cameron to yelp as he was suddenly yanked along for the ride – and Harold and Gwen as well as they were frantically grabbed and pulled along as well.

The camera zoomed out and the music became duller as the Maggots got their start as well, the dinghy moving away from the dock at a much slower pace, enough to drag Trent, Justin, and Lindsay off the dock but not quite enough to keep them afloat on their skis.

/

The music quickly ramped up in pace and intensity as the focus flashed back to the Rats' skiers; the three were currently clinging to each other and their two skis, neither of which were quite on their feet yet.

"Okay...almost...got it!" Gwen said, managing to slide one foot into a ski with one hand while holding onto the tow handle with the other. With a nervous cry she got into a crouching position on the narrow piece of wood, and the focus moved to Harold and Cameron. Each boy had one hand on the tow handle, but while the dweeb's free hand was holding on to the other ski, the bubble-boy's was slung around Harold's neck.

With a grunt, Harold moved his legs and the second ski into position. For a brief second it looked like the ski would get swept away by the water, but a sudden helping hand from Gwen was enough to stabilize it. Harold slid his feet into place, and with a smile shared between the three they stood up and cheered.

The camera panned out and to the left from them to a trail of bubbles behind the Maggots' accelerating dinghy, which soon revealed themselves to be Lindsay, Trent, and Justin somehow still in their pyramid formation.

Also rising up from the water was Fang, who snapped his jaws at the Maggot trio earning a startled cry from Trent. "Hey, we need to go faster!" he called up to his other teammates.

"It doesn't _go_ any faster!" Zoey called back to them with an almost apologetic anxiousness.

"Well keep trying!" Lindsay called out. "Fang's gonna _eat_ us!"

"Wow, Linds, you're _really_ trying to take control here, huh?" Justin asked her.

"Huh?" Lindsay said, looking down at him in confusion – a sentiment that quickly turned into a scream as Fang surged up behind them again. Trent and Justin joined in, but just before the mutant shark could chomp down on them he was shot in the nose by one of the mutant gulls and dropped back into the water with a blank look in his eyes. The three Maggots sent startled looks ahead, and the camera panned over to show Jasmine grinning back at them, the cannon pointed their way and a gull missing from the tank.

"Don't worry, I got your back!" she told them confidently. "Although now I have to make sure _both_ shots count," she added to herself.

The focus cut back to the speedboat as Courtney narrowed her eyes, her cannon already turned backwards. "Alright, I am _not_ gonna risk Jasmine getting a shot at the bells," she called out to Noah.

"Be careful!" Noah replied. "We only have the one gull to spare!"

"And it's all we'll need," Courtney said softly and darkly, firing off her cannon. The gull shot towards Jasmine, who was just turning her own cannon back around – it hit her in the left shoulder, and she immediately felt its effects.

"I've been hit!" she cried out in alarm, beginning to stumble to the side. "I've...been...hiiittt..." she slurred, finally toppling over onto Zoey and knocking the smaller girl away from the ship's wheel.

"Oh no!" the indie girl said, struggling to get out from under her teammate. "Guys, I can't steer!" The shot zoomed out to show the dinghy swerving off-course and plowing into a stand of reeds.

The focus moved ahead back to the Rats, where Courtney pumped a fist and cheered. "Yes! Alright guys, we should be home free!"

The shot briefly zoomed out to show Gwen, Harold, and Cameron cheering, then zoomed back in on Noah. "Good, because we're coming up on the first bell!" he called out, the camera panning along his pointer finger to the first water mine.

Courtney grinned, and the perspective moved to show through her cannon's aiming sight as the cross-hairs aligned with the bell. She fired and the gull flew out, whizzing through and ringing the bell. The mine exploded as the Rats passed by it, and the five half-cheered, half-screamed.

"Oh no, we're _losing_!" Lindsay cried out as the shot cut back to the Maggots, still moving forward in their dinghy.

With a grunt, Zoey got herself out from under Jasmine and took control of the wheel. "Guys, what should we do? I can't steer the boat _and_ shoot the cannon!"

"Just shoot!" Justin told her. "We can't let the Rats hit another bell or we'll lose!"

"But what if the boat hits something?" Trent countered. "We might literally be _sunk_!"

"We're sunk _regardless_ if we can't hit any of the bells!" Justin replied.

"Well, maybe one of _us_ can try to ring the bell?" Lindsay suggested from atop the two boys' shoulders.

"Really, Lindsay?" Justin told her. "Are you just gonna not back me up anymore?"

"Huh?" Lindsay said in confusion. "Justin, I-"

"No time," the model said dismissively, raising a hand to stop her while turning his attention back to the dinghy. "Zoey, if you wanna make up for your little accident with the _hose_ earlier, I _need_ you to fire that cannon!"

The indie girl bit her lip in indecision, but hurried over to the dinghy's weapon all the same and turned it around. The focus cut back to the Rats as they approached the second mine, and with a darkly eager grin Courtney cocked her cannon...but before she could fire, a gull shot past her and her teammates and hit the bell. The Rats cried out as the mine exploded right by them again, and Courtney gasped in indignation.

"Hey!" she called back angrily. "That was _my_ target!"

"Sorry!" Zoey replied. "But not really!"

"Zoey, watch out!" Trent called out in sudden panic, pointing ahead of their boat. Zoey looked from him to the direction he was pointing, then cried out in shock.

Moments later, the dinghy crashed in to a tall rock jutting out of the lake, knocking Zoey off her feet and causing her waterskiing teammates to crash and fall into the boat in turn.

"Hah! Serves you _right_!" Courtney taunted loudly and harshly from the Rats' speedboat. "Okay Noah, bring us around to the last bell!" she commanded.

"Aye aye, Captain," Noah replied with an awkward sort of dryness, circling the speedboat back around.

The camera lingered just long enough for the three skiers to come into focus, and cut in closer to them. "Wow, Courtney's _really_ getting into it," Gwen commented. "She better not go back to bossing us around after this," she added with an annoyed look.

"I...think this is just a temporary effect of adrenaline," Cameron guessed.

"Well remind _me_ to never get her worked up like this," Harold added.

/

The scene flashed back to the Maggots as all except Jasmine got back to their feet.

"Well, at least the dinghy isn't wrecked," Trent said as he looked at the intact front side of their inflatable boat.

"But how are we gonna catch up to the Rats?" Zoey asked in concern. "And what are we gonna do about Jasmine?"

"Okay team, I have an idea!" Lindsay spoke up decisively, drawing her team's attention. "Trent, you take over for the cannon, while Zoey keeps driving and Justin and I ski with _Jasmine_."

"Uh, are we _really_ gonna let the one who let us crash take the wheel again?" Justin asked in disbelief.

"Hey, that only happened because _you_ told her to take the cannon," Trent pointed out.

"Well...," Justin said, at a loss for a retort.

"Guys, come on, we don't have _time_ , right?" Lindsay said, grabbing each of their arms. "Let's just go with _my_ plan, okay?"

"Fine with me," Trent said while Zoey just looked indecisive.

"Well not with _me_ ," Justin said, turning his attention back to the blonde. "Look, Lindsay, I appreciate you trying to help, but I think we can all agree that _I_ should be the one in charge right now. I mean, just _look_ into my eyes and tell me I'm wrong." He pointed to his faces, smiling handsomely and batting his beautiful eyelashes at the blonde.

Lindsay did indeed start looking into his eyes, and her expression became dreamy...until Trent stepped up to them, and thrust the still-unconscious Jasmine into Justin's arms. "No time, guys, we gotta hurry up!"

/

The footage skipped ahead to the Maggots back in motion, the members in position according to Lindsay's plan – Zoey driving, Trent at the cannon, and Justin on both skis with the other girls behind him, Lindsay pinning Jasmine in place.

"Great plan, Lindsay!" Trent called back to the blonde, earning a frown from Justin. "I think we might be back in this!"

/

Another flash took the scene to the Rats, their boat moving back to the right with Courtney looking down her cannon's sights.

"Are you gonna take the shot already or am I gonna have to keep circling until we run out of gas?" Noah called back at her in annoyance.

"Don't blame me," Courtney replied, "how am I supposed to get a clear shot at the mine when it's surrounded by stupid _rocks_?" She made an exasperated motion to the side, and the perspective shifted to a panning shot of the last water mine floating in amongst several tall, craggy rock formations.

"Well you better hurry up," Gwen called out from behind the boat, "because the Maggots are catching up to us!"

The camera quick-panned over to the approaching dinghy, then cut back to the speedboat. "Crap," Courtney muttered. "Bring the boat closer!" she shouted at Noah.

"Wait, no!" Harold immediately called out. "Stop the boat!"

Courtney raised an eyebrow in exasperated disbelief.

xxx

"Stop the boat? _Stop_ the _boat_?!" the ex-CIT repeated. "This is a _race_!" she exclaimed, spreading her arms wide. "Does he _want_ us to lose? Uggh, don't tell me he's still loyal to his old teammates..."

xxx

"You'll have a better shot if you're not moving," Harold continued, "just trust me!"

"Makes sense to me!" Noah called out, pulling back on the throttle and slowing the boat down.

The camera cut back to the Maggots as Zoey watched their opponents. "Hey, they're stopping for some reason!" she called back to Trent.

"Is something wrong with their boat?" Trent replied with a look of confusion. "Or did they stop on purpose?"

"Well if they _did_ ," Justin called out, "maybe we can just get in close and ram them a little bit, throw them off just enough so we can ring the bell first?"

"I don't know," Lindsay said uncertainly, "that doesn't sound like it'll _work_..."

"C'mon, Lindsay, we already did what _you_ wanted to do, let's do what _I_ wanna do this time," Justin told her in a patronizing tone that just seemed to befuddle her.

xxx

"Okay, Justin has been acting _really_ weird lately," Lindsay confessed. "It's like, I don't know, he thinks I'm his _enemy_ or something. But we're in an _alliance_ , so we _can't_ be enemies! Did I do something wrong?"

xxx

"Are you sure you wanna do this, Zoey?" Trent asked the redhead.

"I don't think we have much choice anymore," the indie girl answered nervously, the camera moving behind her as she pointed forward. The shot rapidly zoomed in on the Rats parked by the rocks and sea mine, Courtney carefully lining up her shot while Noah watched from the helm and Gwen, Cameron, and Harold sat on the boat's stern. Those three were the first to turn their heads to the approaching camera and gasp, followed by Noah and then Courtney.

The perspective shifted back to a sideview of the Maggots as their dinghy slammed into the side of the Rats' speedboat, sending the trio of Maggot skiers into the air and causing Courtney to stumble...and fire off her team's last gull.

The music peaked rapidly as the gull hit the bell and kept going, and moments later Lindsay, Jasmine, and Justin fell onto the mine plunging it underwater.

The three humans were the first to surface, and Jasmine had finally woken up from her venom-induced stupor. "What?" she said, looking around in confusion. "What am I doing _here_?"

The sea mine surfaced just then, causing the three teens to scream and back away. The camera backed away too, becoming the view through a pair of binoculars.

"No explosion?" Chris said from the dock, the camera cutting to his side as he lowered the binoculars. "Not cool," he turned and told Chef.

Moments later, an explosion from off-screen lit up the area, and the camera moved behind the two adults just in time to catch the plume of smoke and water rising up from the lake and dissipating just as quickly.

"Ka- _boom_!" the host laughed as a grand tune played in the background.

/

"And the _Rats_ win again!" Chris announced to a triumphant tune as the footage skipped ahead to the winning team assembled on the beach. They cheered, and Harold and Noah high-fived.

"Well Harold," Courtney told the dweeb, "I didn't think that idea was gonna work, but it looks like you were right to get us to stop."

"Yeah, good call back there," Gwen added.

"Thanks," Harold grinned. "I guess that makes me one of the most valuable members of the team, huh?"

Gwen and Courtney's smiles dropped. "Yeah, don't push it," Courtney said.

The focus cut over to the Maggots as their dinghy ran aground on the beach, and Trent and Zoey dragged their singed teammates to shore.

"Seriously, what did I _miss_?" Jasmine asked in a slightly dazed tone.

"Us losing, basically," Trent answered, glaring at the supermodel as he anxiously checked his reflection in a cracked hand mirror. "All thanks to _Justin's_ bad idea."

"Hey, in my defense," the supermodel said, "I didn't see any other way we could stop the Rats from winning. It's not _my_ fault Courtney got lucky. You can't blame a guy for trying, y'know?"

"I _guess_ ," the charred blonde replied with a look of slight confusion. "But, I mean, don't take this the wrong way, but your ideas today didn't really, like, _work_ , but mine _did_. So I kinda think that if we'd just all listened to _me_ then we could've won, or at least _not_ been blown up by a buoy."

"So...what you're saying is that you think _you're_ the better idea person and that we should all just follow what _you_ want when things get tough?" the supermodel asked with a pointed look and a quick pace.

"Uhh... _maybe_?" Lindsay replied uncertainly, hunching slightly as she noticed the curious gazes of Zoey, Trent, and especially Jasmine. "I mean, I'm smarter than I look, y'know."

xxx

"Okay, I think it's pretty clear that Lindsay really _does_ wanna take control of the team," Justin told the confession camera, cleaned up and back in his usual clothes. "And I think I might just have an _idea_ on how to use that to my advantage. Good job, brain," he looked up and tapped the side of his head, "this really makes up for those let-downs in the challenge."

xxx

The scene flashed ahead to Justin leaning up against the side of the Maggots' cabin, looking at his reflection in a mirror until he noticed Jasmine walking by.

"Oh hey, just who I wanted to see," he said with a beautiful smile as he slid out in front of her. "You mind if we talk for a second?"

"Uhh...," Jasmine began, but Justin quickly cut her off.

"Okay, good," he said, taking her by the hand and pulling her closer to the wall. "Now, I know I haven't always followed your lead, but after you got taken out today I _really_ missed having you around to figure things out. You're pretty invaluable, you know that?"

Jasmine smirked, barely hiding her amusement. "Yeah, and?"

"And I don't wanna say it, but I _really_ didn't like how Lindsay was trying to take over the team the _moment_ you were unconscious," Justin continued. "She said it herself, she's smarter than she looks, so I think we should get rid of her before it's too late."

The survivalist chuckled. "Maybe you're on to something, mate."

"You know it," Justin replied, running his fingers through his hair and winking. "Between my looks and your leadership I really do think we're the best pair out here, so we gotta stick together. I'll see you around." He shot her a finger pistol, and walked off.

The camera lingered on Jasmine as she in turn lingered by the side of the cabin, and moments later Trent walked up form behind. "Hey, you weren't just talking to _Justin_ , were you?"

"Yeah, why?" Jasmine replied, turning around to face the musician.

"Well, what'd he say?" Trent asked.

Jasmine snorted and laughed. "He wanted me to vote for _Lindsay_ tonight, if you can believe it."

"You're not gonna do it, are you?" the musician asked warily.

The outback giantess snorted and laughed again. "As if. He's the one I'm voting for. I don't like how he's turned on Lindsay when the girl's so in to him, and I'm tired of him trying to throw me off my game by using his gorgeous good looks. It's a distraction that I _need_ to get rid of."

Trent breathed a sigh of relief and wiped the sweat from his brow. "Man, is _that_ good to know. For a second there I was a little worried he'd gotten to you again."

"Well he didn't," Jasmine smiled, "and I think he might be in for a little surprise tonight."

"Yeah," Trent smiled, and the two bumped fists.

/

The scene flashed again, now showing a close-up of a short lock of red hair as slim and well-manicured hands finished twisting it into a braid. The camera zoomed out to reveal Lindsay and Zoey sitting on a bed in their cabin, the indie girl's pigtails now replaced by short braids.

"There, all done. And now we match!" Lindsay said cheerily, finishing off Zoey's right-side braid then brushing her fingers against the two long braids in her own hair. She held up a hand mirror, and both girls looked at their reflections side-by-side.

"Wow, neat," Zoey said as her roommate put the mirror down and looked more closely at her skin.

"Hey, I never noticed before, but your skin is really good," Lindsay said. "What brand of moisturizer do you use?"

"Oh, uh, it's a small local brand," Zoey answered as she stood up off the bed, "you probably haven't heard of it."

"Well then, I guess I'll have to change that," Lindsay said with a decisive nod before perking up in realization. "Oh, and before I forget, since we're friends and in an alliance and all I figured I'd tell you that Justin wants us to vote Jasmine tonight." Zoey's brow shot up in surprise. "Yeah, I didn't really get _why_ ," Lindsay continued, "but he said he really wanted to know that we're still on his side, which, _duh_ , of _course_ we are."

"Yeah...," Zoey said blankly. "And wait, did you say we were friends?"

Lindsay blinked at her, then raised a brow in confusion. "Well _yeah_ , what else would we be? Is there something wrong?" she asked, tilting her head in concern.

Zoey shook her head, looking rather stunned. "No, it's...it's nothing. I'm just...gonna go outside for a bit, okay?"

"Okay," Lindsay said, still looking somewhat concerned as Zoey left the room.

/

A low, tense, but ultimately emotive tune joined in with a chorus of crickets and frogs as the camera followed Zoey outside. She closed the door and slumped against it, muttering "Friends...?" and touching the braid on the right side of her head that had been completed only minutes before.

The sound of footsteps on creaking wood caught her attention, and she looked up and gasped.

"Hey, Zoey, I've been looking all over for you," Justin said, the perspective inverting to show him smiling down at Zoey with the dusk sky behind him, extending a hand to the young woman. The shot moved back to a sideways view as Zoey accepted the hand up, and Justin's smile widened. "Nice braids," he said, noticing the change in her hairstyle. "Anyway, about the vote-"

"It's Jasmine, right?" Zoey cut him off. "Lindsay already told me you wanted us to vote for her, but-"

Justin's brow furrowed, and he cut her off. "Hold on, I haven't said _anything_ to Lindsay yet," he told the indie girl, earning a look of surprise, and a few deep notes in the background music transitioned it into something more ominous. "She must be trying to get rid of Jasmine and take over the team, just like I thought."

Zoey gasped. "You _really_ think that's what she's doing?"

xxx

Justin opened the confessional with a laugh. "I _totally_ told Lindsay she should vote Jasmine to prove she was really on my side. I guess she must've decided it would be easier to go along with that then to eliminate _me_ tonight."

xxx

" _Definitely_ ," Justin answered. "Good thing I realized it, huh? Now we can vote her out before she causes anymore trouble."

"Yeah...," Zoey said, a troubled expression on her face.

"Okay, great to hear my favorite girl on the island is by my side," Justin said, placing a hand on the indie girl's shoulder, smiling, and batting his eyelashes so that Zoey gave a short, dreamy, and almost gasp-like moan. "See ya later," the supermodel finished in a flirtatious tone, waving and winking and leaving Zoey to slump up against the door of the cabin again.

xxx

"Is Justin really telling the truth?" Zoey asked the confessional camera with great and troubled concern. "Or is this just him trying to manipulate me like with Harold? I mean, it's really hard to resist those _looks_ , but...," her eyes and fingers moved to her right braid again, "Lindsay said she was my _friend_..."

xxx

/

The crackle of a campfire rose over the night's chorus as the background music shifted into the first few deep and dramatic tunes of the elimination ceremony motif, and the camera cut to the moon high in the sky. The scene panned down to a bush rustling just at the edge of the clearing, then zoomed out to show the five Maggots – Trent on the left, then Jasmine, Zoey, Justin, and Lindsay on the far right end – seated all in a line in the front row of stump seats around the fire pit. Their eyes were a mixture of sadness, disappointment, trepidation, and anticipation as they looked towards the just-off-screen host, and with another deep note the ceremony began.

"After an episode filled with questions of leadership and loyalty, it is the _Maggots_ whose bonds must be tested," Chris began, Chef Hatchet already standing by with his hazmat suit and strongbox. "The following campers are momentarily safe," the host continued, holding up his tray of four ordinary marshmallows.

"Trent," he threw the first treat to the musician, who caught it with an eager and relieved grin.

"Zoey," the camera panned over to the indie girl next as she caught her confection with an anxious frown.

"And the slumbering titan known as _Jasmine_ ," the host said next, tossing the smiling survivalist the penultimate marshmallow from the tray.

"Huh?" Lindsay said, perking up in confusion.

"And, the toxic marshmallow of loserdom goes to...," Chris said, the elimination music drawing near to its peak tension as Chef plucked the glowing thing from the box and held it in his tongs.

The shot cut back to Justin and Lindsay, the blonde looking at the supermodel in confusion while he gave her a dark, sly smile in return.

"Sorry, Linds," he said in a smooth and dulcet tone, "but your time is up. No taking over the team for you."

"What?!" Lindsay said, standing up in outrage. "What are you _talking_ about? I would _never_ try and take over the team!"

" _Sure_ you wouldn't," Justin said with a haughty and condescending nod. "Too bad for you someone told me otherwise," he added, holding up the note he'd received and smiling smugly.

Lindsay swiped it from him, quickly read it, and gasped. "Justin, how could you _believe_ this?" she asked him in shock and horror. "I've been on your side since day _one_! I _trusted_ you, and I was doing everything I could to make sure you trusted me back! We were in an _alliance_!" she told him, causing him to cross his arms and close his eyes while still maintaining his smile. "We were _friends_! And...and I thought maybe we could be even _more_ than that!"

Justin chuckled and shook his head. "Lindsay, even if I _did_ believe you felt that way, that _still_ never would've happened. I'm in this for the million, and that means I gotta watch out for threats. And thanks to that note, I realized that everything you did today made you look awfully like a threat."

Lindsay stared at him in disbelief. "You're just throwing away everything we had together over a piece of _paper_?!" she said, crumpling up the note and throwing it on the ground and stamping on it. "I can't believe this! I _liked_ you Justin," she threw up her arms and got in his face as the music took a more fast-paced and dramatic edge, "even though I know the others weren't so sure. But now I realize that they weren't sure for a _reason_ , because you _aren't_ just some mega-gorgeous super-hunk. You're also a _two-faced_ , _backstabbing_ , _lying_ little..."

The music rose up rapidly, culminating in a hand gesture that had to be pixelized, a mouth that had to be pixelized as well, and a long string of words that had to be bleeped. Justin was shown utterly stunned by the verbal assault, his eyes wide and his mouth gaping; Chris and Chef were shown raising their eyebrows in surprise; Trent and Zoey gaped while Jasmine was shown smiling; a hairless mutant squirrel looked out of a tree hollow in shock; an impish smile formed on the host's face; and finally Lindsay finished, descending into heavy breaths.

"Well," Justin said, still looking shocked, "wasn't expecting that. Umm, Chris, you mind wrapping this up?" he said, looking at the host.

"Sure thing," Chris smiled. "The toxic marshmallow goes to...," Justin was shown looking frantically expectant while Lindsay hung her head in defeat, " _Justin_."

" _Huh_?!" both beauties said, Lindsay excitedly and Justin in despair.

"You heard the man," Trent told the model with a smirk. "You're out."

"And good riddance," Jasmine chimed in.

"Sorry," Zoey said, fingering her braids and averting her gaze as Justin turned to her in shock, "but we just couldn't trust you."

The shot cut in to Justin's wide-eyed close-up as he said "I can't believe this..."

/

The screen flipped around a central axis, transitioning the scene to the Dock of Shame with Justin sitting in the bucket of the Hurl of Shame, still quite visibly shocked to be there.

"Chris, cmon', you can't _seriously_ go through with this," he frantically told the smiling host below him. "I'm the most beautiful person on the show!"

"Yeah, no you're not," Chris told him just before he launched the model into the night with a scream. " _I'm_ the most beautiful person on the show," he said, turning around to face the camera as the series' capstone theme began to play. "And _speaking_ of me, what kinds of danger will I have for the campers next time? Find out, on Total! Drama! _Revenge_ , of the Island!"

The camera jumped outwards with each part of the title as usual, but the scene lingered there even as the capstone theme faded.

/

The shot cut back to the campfire pit, now dark and empty save for a rustling coming from the same bush as earlier. The music turned tense and eerie and after a few moments Noah rose up from the foliage. He crept into the clearing casting wary looks around him, passing the stump seats and reaching the crumpled-up note that was still in the ground. With a confident smile and a slightly more nervous look in his eyes he picked it up, looked it over, and put it into his pocket.

xxx

"Okay, so since I haven't had any luck so far with that 'Chris Head' thing," Noah explained to the outhouse camera, the night sky visible through the small openings between the walls and the roof, "I figured I'd try and mess with a few heads and see if that got me anywhere. The note I sent Leonard was kind of a letdown," he said, pulling out the napkin he'd snatched an episode ago. "I figured I could form a secret alliance with the guy and use his annoyance to keep the girls' attention off of me. Had I realized he was just _roleplaying_ I would've done it without the note, but it's better this way. When he screwed up that scavenger hunt I _knew_ our Type A Team Leader would be gunning for him, and even _with_ the wizard's revelation Cameron is still too deep in the girls' pocket to turn against them. Siding with Leonard and Harold would've just meant Leonard got creamed in a tiebreaker and _I'd_ be on the bottom with _Wonder Boy_. So yeah, not following up the first note worked out pretty well for me."

"And more importantly," Noah smirked, taking out the note he'd picked up more recently, " _this_ one actually worked better than I was expecting! I figured it would take longer for that _meathead_ to build up enough paranoia to turn against what was probably his biggest ally, but I guess dumb luck was on my side today. Not sure how things are gonna play out from now on, but I think I'm in a good position to handle whatever gets thrown at me."

xxx

(Fade to Credits)

* * *

 **Author's Note - Post Script**

Welp, that happened. Unlike Lindsay, as so many of you I think were expecting, I decided to eliminate Justin. Why? because it honestly just made more sense to me while writing it - Trent wants Justin gone, and Jasmine and Zoey don't want to listen to him anymore, so there's nobody who'd really want to vote Lindsay off right now. Although I am still happy with the path all the Maggots took to arrive at this conclusion - Trent being worried for his own safety, Jasmine mostly just coming to it by herself (though with some influence from Shawn), Zoey learning more about what it means to be a friend, Lindsay realizing that Justin wasn't who she thought he was, and Justin himself just not being as effective a manipulator or canny a strategist as, say, Alejandro. Overall, I'm really happy with how everything on the Maggots' side came together.

On the Rats' side...well, it's not as striking as the Maggots, but I'm pretty happy all the same. A bit of conflict between Harold and Courtney, Gwen still active with her interest in Trent, Cameron...as the middle-man, in a sense, and then Noah...

Noah's confessional at the end, or the first part at least, was something I had initially wanted to include last episode when Leonard's departure was more immediately relevant, but I felt that I just didn't have the time or space. Plus, it would give a bit more mystery to the source of the notes, a reason which almost caused this last confessional to be delayed even more. But I ultimately decided it would work better here, and I hope you all agree. The strategy itself is keeping in mind with what I've been trying to go with this season, with Noah being more of a behind-the-scenes type of guy who doesn't try to lie and manipulate up front but rather strategize in secret. I just hope that I've explained what he was trying to do well enough, but I suppose I'll find out in the reviews.

That said, let me know what you all think! Until next week,

\- Fangren

* * *

 **Appendix: TSROTI Eliminated Contestants**

Cody - (13th Place)

Izzy - (12th Place | Still AWOL)

Leonard (11th Place)

Justin (10th Place)


	6. Chapter 6 - Runaway Model

**Author's Note**

It's that time of the week again, dear readers, and I hope you're all excited! We're nearly halfway through with this season - hard to believe, I know. But thing have been progressing well, and there's still so much more that I have yet to figure out and decide on.

But for now, let's get on with the reviews!

 **Eternal Nexus Warrior:** Hah, I'm glad you're enjoying Noah right now. And as for the chapter before last...well, you'll find out soon enough what, if anything, it was foreshadowing.

 **Elizabeth Fire Ice Heart:** Thanks! I figured Justin's elimination would be at least a little surprising, and I'm glad you enjoyed Lindsay's rant. I wasn't sure at first if I should include it, but it was such a classic scene for her in canon that I couldn't have something similar here.

 **acosta perez jose ramiro:** Wow, I actually wasn't even thinking about the season one ski challenge, but you're absolutely right that Lindsay is pretty good at that type of thing. And she's also not the type to let someone off with betraying her trust and kindness once she's figured out that's what's happening, either. Also, I'm glad you like the direction I'm taking with Noah.

 **Animation Adventures:** Thank you so much! And yeah, Justin is basically a less-effective Alejandro...so much so that he wasn't able to get very far in the game. With the notes, it just seemed to me like Noah would naturally make it seem like they were from someone else since the point was to _not_ draw attention to himself, and it looks like it worked as planned. Other than that, I'm glad you enjoyed Gwen, Trent, Courtney, and Lindsay's development last week, and I hope you enjoy what comes next!

 **Call Me Ishmael:** Not much to say, other than that I'm glad you're liking how everyone is developing! I hope you enjoy the rest of the season.

 **Ddynamo:** Well, it was a fitting end for him at least. And as for the season's main antagonist...well, what I have in mind for that role will become clearer as the season progresses.

 **Zak Saturday:** Hah, I don't think most people did.

 **Glowing Insanity:** Thanks, I try to twist things up and play with expectations when possible. It doesn't always work, but I'm glad it did here. And as for Noah filling Justin's role...well, all I can say is that Noah's strategy and Justin's are pretty different, though that's already obvious.

 **CVluvFoxy:** Wow, I'm glad it was such a turnaround! I guess that's to be expected when a prime villain candidate is eliminated instead of a fan favorite like Dawn. I'm glad you enjoyed the little moment between Lindsay and Zoey, and those two girls in general - I've been fairly conscious as of late as to how I want to develop them, and I'm happy with what I've come up with. Same with Gwent, in that I happy with how their being on opposite teams has forced them to develop and relate with the rest of the cast. And as for Noah...well, I agree that more villains need to be more behind-the-scenes types, and I hope I don't disappoint with him.

 **P. T. Piranha:** Mmm, yeah, I was kind of keeping Noah somewhat to the side or in the background - always there, but never prominent. I think it works for him, as it's fairly low-effort but if done right can keep him in the game for a long time without anyone being the wiser.

 **The Misguided Angel of Death:** Hah, I'm glad you're enjoying Lindsay's development. She really is an amazing person, isn't she? And Justin honestly just got unlucky in a way, he was completely unaware of the chain of events that led to practically everyone turning against him. Zoey is another person I'm really happy I've been able to develop, she had so much wasted potential in canon. And as for today's cameo, I will say that it's Dakota, but Sugar is an interesting second choice if only because it would force the plot pretty far off its canon rails.

 **Tokusatsu-31st Century:** Yup, I was deliberately trying to make Justin into the obvious antagonist choice - but sometimes those types of people just don't make it far into the competition.

 **Guest:** I did consider doing the 'Admiral Lindsay, Her Hotness' bit, but ultimately I was just unable to work it in - there was just so much else that I needed to do. And yeah, with Zoey learning more about friendship it was only natural that she wouldn't make the same mistake as with Harold. And as for the main villain...well, you'll find out with time.

 **ashDanLand:** Fair enough. And yeah, Justin was pretty ineffective in canon, so I wouldn't be surprised if part of the reason why Alejandro was created was to show how that sort of villain could really be done. And...Lindsay as the antagonist, you say? Sorry, but I can't see it. And, of course, you're right to think that I'm hiding something, as I almost always am.

 **OMAC001:** Who knows? You'll just have to wait and see.

 **Sarcasm is a Habit:** Thanks! Although sadly Jasmine never actually had the chum bucket on her head. Harold...I don't think really has the sort of guile to actually pull off the notes, I think his skullduggery tends to be more straightforward (as in his ballot-stuffing in season one of canon). But I'm glad you enjoyed the fake-out with Lindsay and Justin, and I hope you enjoy what happens next!

 **PizzaTheBomb:** Wow, I'm happy that you're so happy that I didn't eliminate Lindsay! Yeah, she's pretty awesome when given the chance to develop, and I'm glad I was able to show some of that off last week. Same with Zoey, really.

 **DSX62415:** Mmm, yeah, Noah's a crafty one. And I'm glad you enjoyed the fake-out with the Justin boot.

 **moka evans:** Thanks! I'm glad you liked it so much. And yeah, nobody in the cast can really match Scott's type of deviousness - but that just means I get to be more creative with the villainy this season. Speaking of villains, it was surprisingly difficult to get Lindsay and Justin's behavior just right during last week's challenge in order for Justin to become suspicious, but I think it all worked out well. Incidentally, Courtney shooting Jasmine was more a parallel to Jo shooting Lightning in the canon episode, which is what caused the canon Rats to basically begin their downward spiral - Scott secretly shooting Sam was later.  
Honestly, the original stereotypes had a lot of oddities so it's possible they were decided upon long before the story was finished, and then basically ignored. It is a shame, though, that Noah never really got to do any scheming in canon, so I'm glad I've been able to rectify that a little.

 **bruno14:** Ah, right, I see. And yeah, Justin certainly had it coming with Lindsay blowing up, and that whole scene having a different feel than in canon is to be expected due to the different circumstances, which I think makes it a better callback. Not much else I can think to say right now, other than that I have no interest in superhero movies and as such I will not be going to see Civil War.

 **graveexcitement:** Yeah, once I realized how much of the cast was shared it just lodged itself in the back of my mind. And yeah, it's been super super weird at how fast this season is going; what used to be only the first quarter is now the first half. It's almost scary, to be honest.

 **FOWLKON:** Yup, exactly - the Maggots just weren't gonna go with Justin again after everything that had happened since then. And good point about the differences between TD and actual reality shows regarding villains and when they go home, though in Survivor's case there are often late-running villains, if only because real villains are a little more complex and better at laying low early on...or are only villains by way of their edit, but I digress. Other than that, I'm glad you enjoyed the direction I've been taking most everyone still on the cast!

 **VIPGuest:** Wow, yeah, I'd say. Sorry to hear you say that about Zoey, though...anyway, I answered your question about favorite characters as honestly as I could, but as for my favorite season...probably a toss-up between World Tour and Pahkitew Island, I guess?

 **Gage the Hedgehog:** Thanks!

 **Explorer of the Unknown:** Yup, that trope is somewhat of a mainstay, I guess, in this series? Though I don't know if I'll use, or even need, it in the next two seasons. And yeah, in many ways Justin is just a less-effective version of Alejandro; he just doesn't really have the right kind of mind to out-strategize people for very long. Regarding Gwen being more forward with Trent than she was in canon...well, honestly a lot of that is just because I need them to be, as this series is half as long as TDI so even if they did both make it far there still isn't as much time for their relationship to develop. Maybe something more drawn-out would suit them better, but I don't really have the time for it.  
I'm happy you enjoyed the last few scenes with Zoey - she's definitely come along way from a few episodes a go, and even from canon. The whole 'learning the meaning of friendship' thing is just such a natural fit for her, so I'm glad it's been working. Same with Noah's strategy, at least so far - he naturally fits as a background or side character, and he's not the type to really draw attention to himself if it can be avoided. He doesn't want people to think of him as that important, though how that ends up playing out for him in the long run has yet to be seen,

 **Star Saber21:** Hmm, well, who knows? I'm glad you enjoyed Lindsay's not-quite-goodbye, and Noah's behind-the-scenes strategy. I hope you enjoy how everything plays out.

 **I. M. Poik:** Yup, like I've said before, Justin is basically a less-effective version of Alejandro. I'm glad you've recognized Harold's recognition by his team, and that you're enjoying Noah's strategy. Something steady and sneaky befits him, I think.l

 **Knifez:** Hmmm...well, hopefully you'll end up enjoying what I have in mind regarding the season's villains. And as for the cliche...I honestly don't know if I've ever really pulled off the gloat-before-getting-eliminated thing? At least not this straight, with the gloating at the actual elimination ceremony. Then again, I've eliminated a lot of villains so it's possible I forgot something. And at any rate, most people actually seemed surprised that Justin was booted last week...  
Regarding the potential double boot/returnee situation, I'll say that there's a strong possibility of it happening. Though keep in mind that I haven't yet worked out exactly how it'll all play out, particularly since I haven't actually finished next week's chapter yet.

 **StayOuttaMyShed:** Thanks, that's what I was hoping for - a bit of misdirection with readers expecting what appeared to be main villain Justin getting another person eliminated, only to utterly fail. And...perhaps you have a point about her not being portrayed as much of a ditz last chapter, but in part that's because I just wanted to show that she's more than that. She's still the almost childishly naive and airheaded girl as always, but admittedly those aren't always going to be the most prominent parts of her character.  
I'm glad you're enjoying the dynamic between the Rats, though I will admit that Cameron...isn't as different as maybe I wanted? I don't know, he's been a little hard to figure out but I'm confident I'll do him good.  
Hah, I'm happy somebody caught Zoey's indie make-up line. But that aside, I'm really happy with the direction I've been able to take Zoey, even if it's basically just 'learning the true meaning of friendship'; it's just made her so much more interesting to have around. And yeah, all four of the canon Drama Brothers are in this season. I actually considered having their band form early to play the role of musical guest for the World Tour aftermaths, but quickly decided against it. Whether or not they'll ever form the band in the Shuffledverse...well, probably not - though that's not to say a band of some sort involving some of them is off the table.  
I'm glad that you, too, are enjoying Noah's secretive strategy with the notes. I did sort of consider giving the reveal a bit more of a build-up, but between wanting to just get it over with and another reason I can't say right now, I figured it would be best to just do it last week. All in all, I hope my plans for him meet our expectations.

 **wifishark:** Thank you. Part of me is a little sad that Justin wasn't anymore effective here than in canon, but hey - not everyone can be, especially villains. And as for Noah...well, you'll find out in due time.

 **link9753:** Hmmm...well...I can't really comment on your thoughts regarding Justin's potential place in next season's cast, so I'll just say that your thoughts on this season's finale are interesting, at least.

And, finally, that's over with for now. Like last weel, the **_poll in my profile will remain up for the time being,_** and as always **_a TVTropes page for this series exists_** , and as per usual with such things, could always use more work. I thoroughly appreciate those who've already been working on it, and look forward to seeing what you all add next.

The current teams are as follows:

Toxic Rats: Cameron, Courtney, Gwen, Noah, Harold

Mutant Maggots: Jasmine, Lindsay, Trent, Zoey

How will they chance by the end of this week's episode? Read on, find out, and enjoy.

\- Fangren

* * *

 **Episode 6 – Runaway Model**

"Previously, on Total Drama Revenge of the Island!" Chris opened over a stock shot of Wawanakwa, the capstone theme starting up in the background. "The campers went _deep_ ," the recap montage opened with Justin and Harold sinking to the lake bed in their antique diving suits, the dweeb quickly getting held back by Fang, "in an underwater scavenger hunt."

"A mysterious note made _Justin_ all paranoid about _Lindsay_ ," the supermodel was shown reading the note he'd found under his pillow, then narrowing his eyes suspiciously at Lindsay standing on the air hose, and then arguing with the blonde as they water-skied in pyramid formation. "While everybody else _but_ Lindsay got sick of having Justin around," Harold was shown complaining to Noah, then Trent to Gwen, then Zoey was shown consulting first Trent and then Jasmine.

"And when the Maggots lost the water skiing challenge," Courtney's final gull was shown ringing the third bell just before Lindsay, Justin, and Jasmine fell on it, "Justin tried to convince the others to vote Lindsay out, only for _him_ to get _chewed_ out instead." The model was shown talking to Jasmine and Zoey, then his former ally was shown launching into a long tirade of censored words and gestures. Chris laughed, and Justin was shown getting Hurled.

"It's now Team Rat versus Team Maggot," the host said, the Rats' logo appearing on-screen against a radiant golden background. The logo rotated around into the Maggots' logo, and a four-way split-screen of the Maggots' remaining members rose up from the background – Zoey in the upper left against a brownish-red backdrop; Trent in the upper right against dark blue; Lindsay in the bottom left against turquoise; and Jasmine in the bottom right against yellow. "Will the Maggots man up before all their men are down? Let's hope not," Chris said as the scene cut to him standing at the end of the dock with Chef, "there's nothing more entertaining than a man down."

As if on cue the wood under Chef started to creak and crack, breaking away and sending Chef plunging into the lake with a startled scream. Chris laughed. "More where that came from, right now," he pointed at the camera, "on Total! Drama! _Revenge_ of the _Island_!"

xxx

(Fade to Opening Theme)

 _Dear Mom and Dad, I'm doin' fine;_

 _You guys are on my mind!_

 _Ya asked me what I wanted to be,_

 _And now I think the answer is plain to see!_

 _I wanna be...famous!_

 _I wanna live close to the sun!_

 _Well pack your bags, 'cause I've already won!_

 _Everythin' to prove, nothin' in my way;_

 _I'll get there one day._

 _'Cause I wanna be...famous!_

 _(Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

 _I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

 _I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

(Fade to Episode)

xxx

The sun was already high in the sky as the episode opened, and a loon cried out in the distance as the camera panned down onto the communal bathroom then cut inside. The mirror on the back wall was too cracked and smudged to use, the trash can was grimy, and the strip of fly paper hanging in the corner was in need of a change, but nevertheless Jasmine, Zoey, and Lindsay were still gathered along the countertop – the survivalist sitting on the far left; the indie girl adjusting the flower in her still-braided hair; and the bubbly blonde happily painting her nails.

"Mmm, _definitely_ the right color for me right now," Lindsay said, finishing up and admiring her left hand. "Don't you think so?" she asked Zoey.

"Yeah, it looks great on you," she answered happily.

xxx

"Being friends with Lindsay is actually really nice," Zoey confessed. "I feel bad for not really giving her a chance before...but luckily, I guess _she_ still gave me one. Maybe...there's more to this whole _friendship_ thing than I thought," she added, putting a hand on her arm and flashing a sheepish smile that quickly turned anxious. "I...really need to get around to talking to _Harold_ , don't I?"

xxx

"Ooh, Jasmine, you should _totally_ let me do your nails next," Lindsay offered, taking the taller girl's hand. She looked more closely at it, and added "And maybe give you a manicure too, you could use one."

Jasmine chuckled. "Thanks for the offer, but I wouldn't bother if I were you," she told her teammate. "Anything you do to my nails isn't gonna hold up for very long outdoors. Besides, I'm happy with the look I've got. It's more.. _me_ , y'know?"

" _So_ true," Lindsay nodded. Zoey looked from her to Jasmine, and then smiled contentedly.

/

The scene flashed to the Rat's cabin, a fast-paced chiptune began to play as Harold said "So who's ready to go out there and kick some Maggot _butt_?" The shot cut inside to show him addressing Noah and Cameron, the two boys sitting on Cameron's bed. "By which I mean the other team, of course, since actual maggots don't technically _have_ butts."

"Wow, what's got you so fired up?" Noah asked dryly as the chiptune faded away. "I figured with _Justin_ gone your old teammates would be back in your good books."

"Well _sor-ry_ for wanting to support my _current_ team," Harold retorted. "Just because I'm ready to forgive Jasmine and Zoey if they apologize to me doesn't mean I'm gonna let that interfere with my performance. I mean _gosh_ , what kind of guy do you take me for?"

"One that's incredibly melodramatic?" Noah answered.

"Well _forgive_ me for _feeling_ ," Harold cried out, making an exaggerated and almost Shakespearean hand gesture.

"You're forgiven," Noah said, stretching his arms and standing up off the bed. "Although you still haven't explained why you're so gung-ho with the team spirit."

Harold stopped and blinked. "Oh, right," he said with an embarrassed smile. "Honestly, I just don't want Courtney to vote me out if we lose today. I figure if I make it clear who's side I'm on, she won't be able to use me as a scapegoat."

"Sounds simple enough," his lazy roommate told him before looking over at the third Rat present. "What do you think, bubble-boy? Share your thoughts with the _class_."

Cameron looked uneasy at the abrupt shift of focus onto him, but his expression quickly became thoughtful. "Well, it's true that Courtney _is_ still pretty critical of any perceived weakness, but I doubt she'd _actually_ use your former loyalty to the Maggots as a reason to vote you off. I think she's pretty much grown past being unable to forgive the faults she sees in us."

Noah smirked and chuckled and elbowed Harold in the side. "You hear that?" he said. "He thinks she's _pretty_." Harold snorted and smiled and snickered as well

"Hey, you know that's not what I said," Cameron objected with growing anger.

"Relax, Cameron, we know," Noah told him. "Just thought we'd poke a little fun."

The bubble-boy raised an eyebrow at them, then raised a thoughtful finger to his lip. "Huh, I've never _been_ teased about admiring a girl before," he said.

Harold and Noah started snickering again. "Heheheh, _admiring_ ," Harold chuckled, earning an annoyed look from Cameron.

/

Another flash took the scene to bonfire pit, the strumming of a guitar mixing in with a pleasant tune as the camera zoomed in on Trent and Gwen, sitting together and facing each other on the stump seats. The goth watched with a smile as he played for a few more seconds, the musician's performance ending with a few slower notes and one final strum.

"So what do you think?" Trent looked up and asked with a smile of his own.

"It was great," Gwen answered. "I can't wait to hear the finished version."

"Thanks, and me too," Trent laughed. He paused for a second, then said "This is gonna sound corny, but...lately, when I've been writing music, I've been thinking a lot about _you_."

Gwen blushed. "Really? That's so sweet."

xxx

"Yeah, Trent's pretty cool, I guess...," Gwen opened her confessional, leaning against the wall with her right leg up on the seat. "Okay," she admitted with a growing smile, "he's _more_ than just cool, he's pretty much _incredible_! Just...don't tell anyone I said that, okay?" she told the camera with a look of concern.

xxx

"Sooo...does that make me your muse, then?" Gwen asked with a coy smile.

Trent chuckled again. "Yeah, I guess it does. My dark, and _brilliant_ muse," he told her, gazing into her eyes and sharing a smile.

They lingered that way for a second before footsteps and a voice from off-screen got their attention. "Oh, hey Gwen!" Courtney said, the camera cutting outward to show her walking up to the two from the clearing's main entrance. "And...Trent...," she added, looking at the musician with a more awkward smile.

"Oh hey Courtney, what's up?" Gwen turned and greeted her teammate as Trent's smile faded into a more level look.

"Oh, nothing much," Courtney replied with an awkward laugh. "Just, you know, figured I'd take a walk and see what everyone was up to."

"Oh really?" the goth smirked. "Well, Trent and I have just been enjoying ourselves up here. Getting some peace and quiet before the challenge, you know?"

"Yeah, sounds...great...," the ex-CIT said with another awkward laugh.

xxx

"Okay, I know I said I wouldn't get on Gwen's case about...whatever it is she has with _Trent_ ," Courtney told the outhouse camera, annoyance covering her face, "but that doesn't mean I have to like it. Then again," she tapped her chin in thought, "she hasn't really been letting it affect her _performance_ from what I can tell. Plus, it _might_ be a smart move in the long-term to have both of them on my side since the teams should be merging soon. Hmm...," she tapped her chin a few more times, "I'm gonna have to give this some major thought."

xxx

The whining ring as the scene cut to a shot of one of the island's loudspeakers heralded a broadcast from the host. "Iiiit's _challenge_ time!" he began. "Campers~! Meet me on the other side of the island~!" he announced in an almost sing-song voice.

/

The footage immediately skipped ahead to the nine teams already nearly assembled on two sets of low bleachers in a clearing lined with a handful of stage and spot lights. The four Maggots were seated on the stands to the left of the camera, while Gwen and Courtney were just now filing in with their teammates on the right.

"Hello Gwen, hello Courtney," Cameron greeted the two.

"Hey Cam," the goth smiled, giving him a short wave before sitting down behind him.

"Any sign of Chris yet?" Courtney added, taking her seat next to the bubble-boy. "I wanna know what he expects us to do so I can figure out our winning _strategy_."

"Not yet," Cameron smiled before a sudden and rather trendy tune caught their attention.

The perspective inverted to reveal that the two teams had gathered before a large stage and runway, complete with a short catwalk and a large curtained-off backstage area. Chef was already waiting in the pink dress he'd worn to ceremonies back in season two, and Chris shortly joined him by way of descending from above with his jetpack. The host was wearing a sharp gray suit and fashionable glasses with tinted lens, but more noticeable were the changes to his hair – it was now pure white and long enough for him to sport a short ponytail.

Chef walked up as he landed and took the jetpack of his back, then walked away as Chris spread his arms and smiled. "Welcome to your challenge," he opened, "the Weird and Wild Fashion _Spectacular_!" He took a paper fan out of his breast pocket and waved it a bit as he spread his arms even wider.

"Ooh, I _love_ fashion!" Lindsay squealed, clapping eagerly. "This is _so_ my challenge."

"Yeah, with you on our team we'll be hard to beat," Zoey told her happily.

"Hey," Courtney spoke up, drawing both the Maggots' attention and the camera over to her, "I happen to know _plenty_ about fashion. Don't think we won't put up a fight on this."

"Hey, as long as _I_ don't have to be the model," Gwen said, the camera panning up onto her as she slumped over in annoyance. "Foo-foo girly and getting stared at are _not_ my thing."

A sudden airhorn caused the Rats to cringe in irritation, and the camera cut to an annoyed-looking Chris. "Zip it!" he commanded as the airhorn petered out. " _You_ won't be walking the catwalk," he started to fan himself, "no-no-no- _no_. No amount of fashion can help _you_ people...except _maaaybe_ Lindsay."

The shot briefly cut to Lindsay as she clasped her hands and smiled sweetly, a matching tune playing in the background before the trendy music resumed.

"Here's how it's gonna work," the host continued. "Each team gets a wardrobe of clothes," the camera cut to a dresser, clothes rack, and several pieces of luggage on the side of the stage, "a make-up kit, and ten minutes to dress and make up a model." Chef held up an hourglass and glared mutely at the camera. "Which, you'll send down the runway," the shot zoomed in on the host's fan as he walked his fingers across it, "to be judged by myself, Chef, and today's Total Drama classic competitor, _Dakota_!"

The shot cut back to the wardrobe pile as the smallest case lying on the stage opened up and the heiress rose up out of it to a triumphant tune. "Hey everyone!" Dakota said, striking a pose as she stepped out of the suitcase. "It's so great to _be_ here, I bought a new pair of shoes _just_ for judging." She motioned to her feet, and the camera zoomed in on the sparkling and strappy heels that had replaced her old pink wedges.

"Wow!" Zoey exclaimed, sharing an excited look with Lindsay. "We get to dress an actual _model_!"

"Uh-huh," Chris said, scraping some white powder off his shoulder with his fan. "Right after you _catch_ one."

"Well, that doesn't sound too hard," Jasmine said. "I mean, after _Justin_ I'm pretty sure all of us can handle a model."

"Did I say _human_ models?" Chris corrected, fanning himself again as he walked across the stage. "Don't think so! No, your models are in _there_!" With a dramatic riff he thrust his finger off to the right, forcing Dakota to duck under his arm. The camera quick-panned to the woods just as an earth-shattering roar shook the area.

"They're wild! They're _mutated_!" Chris told the campers, the camera moving behind his back. "And like me, they _despise_ teenagers." The five Rats were shown looking shocked and concerned.

"Okay fashionistas," the host said in a campy accent, " _go_!" He blew his airhorn again, and the campers ran off.

/

The footage flashed ahead to a trail in the woods, Zoey searching behind a rock in the background while Harold and Noah walked by in the foreground. The camera panned to the right and stopped on Cameron and Gwen, her who were warily looking upwards.

Something croaked above them and the shot cut to a small frog, seemingly normal aside from an eye stalk on the top of its head, sitting on a branch. With a grunt of effort Courtney pounced on it from the right, and smiled when she opened her hands and saw she'd caught it. Unfortunately for her, the background music turned dramatic as the mutant frog produced an odd noise and flash of light, blinking out of sight but quickly reappearing on top of the confused young woman's head. With another noise and flash of light it disappeared, this time bringing Courtney with it, and they blinked back into existence in mid-air a few yards away. Courtney screamed as she started to fall, and the mutant frog teleported away to presumed safety before its failed assailant landed with a crash on the forest floor.

/

In another part of the forest, Lindsay was looking around absentmindedly while approaching what appeared to be a gigantic turtle shell, a short and spiky tail poking out of one end. The girl sat down on the shell and started pursing her lips and tapping her chin in thought, but gasped and wailed when the tail suddenly wrapped around her leg and pulled her inside the shell. The beast inside growled and stood up, its stout legs and turtle head popping out of the shell's holes...along with Lindsay. With another growl the mutant punched her away, and she landed in a heap with a pained groan.

/

The camera cut next to what appeared to be an ordinary beaver sitting perfectly still just at the edge of a bush. The music turned tense as Harold rose grinning from another bush in the background, then pounced upon it with a dramatic beat. "Yes! Awesome!" he cheered, his jubilation quickly fading into confusion as the unmoving beaver was somehow lifted up by its tail, taking Harold with it...

The shot cut outward to reveal the beaver has no more than a lure of a large bipedal anglerfish-like monster, which promptly roared. Noah, who was standing nearby, promptly screamed and ran away, and was soon followed by Harold and the angler mutant.

/

Another flash moved the focus to a close-up of a slice of pepperoni pizza, lying on the ground in the middle of a loop of rope that led of to the left. "What on earth...?" Jasmine said, the camera zooming out to show her looking down at it and scratching her head. She looked up and smiled, and the shot cut over to none other than Fang not quite hidden behind a tree, an axe in one hand and the anchored rope of his snare trap in the other.

Jasmine chuckled. "You know I can _see_ you, right?" she asked the mutant shark, startling him out of hiding. The camera zoomed out once more to show the survivalist walking past the trap and towards Fang, apparently without fear – though she stopped before she got too close. "And besides, a trap like this wouldn't have caught me. That's what you wanted, right? To get revenge for me shooting you with that _gull_ the other day?"

Fang growled at the memory, but quickly stopped, held up a hand, then reached behind the tree and pulled out a piece of paper. He held it up with one hand while pointing to the gap in his teeth with the other, and the camera zoomed in on a very crude crayon drawing of a certain red-haired, green-garbed wild child.

"Ohhh," Jasmine said in comprehension, "you're after _Izzy_. Good luck with that, mate, Chris has been searching for _her_ for _weeks_."

As if on cue, the cackling cry of the girl in question rose up from the treetops along with a renewed energy in the dramatic background score. She suddenly darted down from the treetops, landed with a roll past the snare trap, picking up the pizza as she went, then darted back off without a single word.

The camera cut back to Fang and Jasmine as the mutant growled and ran off after his quarry, and Jasmine just shrugged and continued on in the opposite direction.

/

The scene cut abruptly to a massive mutant brawl between a massive two-headed rabbit, two spiny woolly beavers, and a hairless squirrel zapping them with its eye-lasers from a nearby branch. The camera panned left as a giant hermit crab scuttled up and snapped its claws, with Noah, Harold, and Gwen watching from behind a bush in the background with wide eyes.

"So...which one do you think we should use?" Gwen asked.

"How about one that _won't_ tear us to shreds the moment we get within three feet of it," Noah replied.

A whine signaled the loudspeaker turning on once again, and soon enough Chris' announcement rang through the air. "Five minutes, people!"

"Hey guys!" Cameron quickly followed, directing his teammates' attention to their right. "How about that slimy maggot?" he asked, the shot cutting to close-up of a small green caterpillar happily chewing on a leaf atop a fallen log. "The one that's the size of a beagle," Cameron clarified, the camera pulling back to reveal the much larger maggot standing nearby. It promptly vomited up a puddle of green fluid.

"It'd be a cinch to catch," he explained, the camera cutting to all five Rats standing in a row, "and dress. We could just...slide it down the runway."

"Good idea," Courtney told him, "but using the _other_ team's mascot as our model is probably a bad idea.."

Cameron rubbed his chin in thought. "Well then, how about that?" he said, pointing back towards the side, the camera following to show a large hairless rat jump onto the log. It quickly stuffed the smaller maggot into its mouth, then chittered and looked around.

" _Perfect_ ," Courtney said with a sly grin.

/

"Okay, did _anybody_ find something we can catch?" Trent asked his teammates, the Maggots now hunkering down behind a bush.

"Not really," Lindsay said. "But honestly, I don't think any of the animals out here would look that good in people clothes to begin with. They're not that cute _or_ people-like."

"So...if we want something that's _human_ -like," Zoey said thoughtfully with a brief look around, "then what about him?" She stood up and pointed over the bush, and the shot cut to none other than Sasquatchanakwa walking into a cave, oblivious to the teens watching him.

"Maybe, but how are we gonna catch him?" Trent asked.

Jasmine smirked. "Leave _that_ job to _me_ ," she told her teammates.

/

"Alright, in order to snare something you gotta have the right _bait_ ," Jasmine said, the scene flashing back to the stage as the tallest of the Maggots started looking through the various dressers and trunks that made up the wardrobe Chris had provided. "Once we lure the sasquatch out into the open, we can overpower it and get it dressed. Understood?"

The camera cut to the rather blank faces of her teammates. "Uhh, I _guess_ so," Trent said warily. "But what could you _possibly_ use to attract its attention?"

" _This_ ," Jasmine smirked, finally pulling something out of one of the trunk of clothes – a cowboy hat which the camera promptly zoomed in on, a radiant background appearing as a triumphant tune played.

"Oh! Just like in season one!" Zoey said brightly as the shot cut back to her, Trent, and Lindsay.

"Exactly," Jasmine nodded. "Now let's grab some clothes and get back to that cave."

/

The scene immediately flashed away, but to the Rats rather than the sasquatch cave.

"Alright, just to make things clear," Courtney addressed her teammates, their mutant rat of a model firmly in Gwen's grip, "none of you are gonna object to me dressing the rat, right? I mean, I'm pretty sure _I'm_ the most well put together out of all of us."

"Well, unless you think the judges wanna see a _gothic_ rat," Gwen replied, locking eyes with the rodent she was holding. It chittered in confusion, and the camera panned to the boys – Cameron and Noah giving blank or bored but ultimately silent looks while Harold raised a finger and opened his mouth as if to speak. Courtney gave him a withering look, however, and he lowered his finger and looked down.

A sudden ringing got the team's attention, and Chris announced "Three minutes remaining!" over an unseen loudspeaker.

"Well, we should probably just go with Courtney's idea," Cameron said.

"Exactly," the ex-CIT said, hands on her hips and a smug smile on her lips. She cracked her knuckles, then grinned darkly at the mutant rat they'd captured. "Alright, time to work my _magic_ ," she said, and the hairless rodent squirmed uncomfortably in Gwen's arms.

/

The music became low and tense as the scene cut back to outside the cave, the four Maggots hiding behind a rock with a couple duffel bags on the ground and the cowboy hat in Zoey's hands.

"Alright," Jasmine whispered, "let's set the hat down and get into position."

The other three nodded, and the scene cut inside the cave. Sasquatchanakwa was sitting in a wooden armchair, drinking a can of soda and watching some jaunty-themed show on an old television set when a sharp whistle from outside caught his attention. With a curious grunt he stood up and walked to the cave entrance, the camera following behind him and cutting to an over-the-shoulder perspective. It zoomed in on the cowboy hat lying on the ground just next to the large rock formation, and the ape-man smiled. It walked forward, bent over and picked it up, then put in on and happily adjusted it.

"Get him!" came the call, startling Sasquatchanakwa – and startling him even more when Jasmine, Trent, and Zoey jumped out from behind the rock. Jasmine quickly tackled him to the ground while her teammates, looking far less certain, pinned down his arms.

"Lindsay, quick! The clothes!" Jasmine called back over her shoulder, punching the thrashing ape-man in his head and chest while Trent and Zoey struggled to keep his arms away from her.

The shot cut over to Lindsay still by the rocks. She frantically bent over and started sorting through the bags of clothes they'd brought, but stopped when Zoey flew screaming over her head. Lindsay winced as Zoey crashed painfully off-screen, then winced again as Trent flew by moments later and landed similarly.

"Umm...," she said, casting a nervous glance to the right as the sound of several heavy blows filled the air, and even Jasmine was thrown through the air. "Maybe we should try something _else_..."

The shot cut back to the cave as Sasquatchanakwa, looking rather beat-up with several missing patches of fur, adjusted his cowboy hat with a snort and retreated back into his lair.

/

The scene flashed back to the Rats, the camera positioned close to Courtney's face but focused on her four teammates behind her. The camera zoomed out as they watched her apparently tie a sleek steel blue tie around their unseen model's neck.

" _There_ ," she said, letting out a satisfied breath and brushing her hands together. "Okay, tell me what you think. It's good, right?"

"Looks like it to me!" Cameron said brightly.

"Well, it's not what I would've picked," Gwen said.

"Me neither," Harold chimed in.

Another ringing got their attention, and they looked up towards an unseen loudspeaker as Chris announced " _One_ minute!"

"Well, I think that settles it," Noah said. "For better or worse, we're stuck with this. Let's just get back to Chris."

"Yeah, exactly," Courtney said with a hint of smugness that quickly faded. "Hey, wait, what do you mean 'or _worse_ '?" she asked of as her teammates started walking away.

/

"I hope this idea of yours _works_...," Zoey nervously told Lindsay as the scene flashed to the two girls running through the woods, dropping clothing from the duffel bags they were carrying.

"I don't see why it wouldn't," Lindsay replied. "I mean, we _know_ it likes clothes, right? Plus, this way we can get it back to Chris with _out_ any more ouchies."

"Yeah, I guess you're right," Zoey smiled. "It's like a trail of breadcrumbs..."

"...only the _crumbs_ are _fashion_!" Lindsay finished happily.

"Let's just hope we can get back there in time," Zoey added. "Shouldn't Jasmine and Trent be luring it out soon?"

She was answered by a shrill, piercing whistle, and then that was answered in turn by an earth-shattering roar.

"Yup, I think that was them," Lindsay said, and the two girls picked up their pace.

/

A grandiose tune started playing as the scene cut to a spotlight as it turned on; then a couple stage lights turning on as well; then a mutant squirrel hopping up next to a book-reading bear which lowered its book to reveal its three eyes, both animals looking at something curiously; then the stage and catwalk, Chris front and center with Chef and Dakota – the former in sort of rapper-ish outfit with a red tracksuit and hat, earphones, and gold chains – sitting at the judge's table.

"It's freaky forest fashion time!" the host announced as the music reached its climax. "Rat-istas," he turned and pointed his fan backstage, "show me somethin' _fierce_." The five Rats walked out on stage, Noah, Harold, and Courtney on the left with Cameron and Gwen on the right. Only the bubble-boy and ex-CIT were looking especially confident.

"Chef, drop that needle!" Chris commanded next, the shot cutting to a close-up of a record turntable as the needle was dropped onto the spinning disc and a trendy tune began to play. The camera zoomed out, and Chef gave the host and campers a thumbs-up.

"This dashing rodent is sporting the _height_ of modern business casual attire," Courtney began smoothly, motioning to the gap between her and Cameron as their model reluctantly scurried out on all fours but continued down the runway on its hind legs. In addition to the steel blue tie it was wearing a fine gray vest, a light blue dress shirt, and dark gray pants that fit surprisingly well. The camera followed it as it walked along looking both nervous and awkward, Courtney continuing her piece all the while. "His three-piece _ensemble_ is a relaxed fit, sleek enough to show he means business but still comfortable enough for the rodent on the go." She finished up with a haughty look, and the camera panned right to show Gwen rolling her eyes.

"Sensible," Chris said as the rat reached the end of the catwalk, "although the model doesn't exactly scream _comfortable_ right now." The camera briefly cut back to the rat as it chittered nervously, still looking around. "I give it an 8.5!" the host announced, a victorious tune playing as he held up a placard with his score.

" _Yes_!" Courtney and Cameron cheered, their three teammates also smiling happily.

"I could see myself in that," Chef said from the leftmost seat, holding up an 8.1.

"Hmm," Dakota said in between the two grown men, pursing her lips and holding up a 5.3 to the immediate objection of the Rats. "Hey, it's nice, but it's _so_ been done before," Dakota explained as the two men looked at her.

"Fair enough," Chris said, looking back towards the catwalk. "Show me what you've got, Maggots!" he called out, the trendy music resuming as the shot cut back to the stage, showing it utterly empty. The camera zoomed in and the music kept playing, but for several more seconds there was still no movement backstage. "...Maggots?" Chris called out again and finally Lindsay and Zoey ran out, out of both breath and clothing-filled duffel bags.

"As you can see, the yeti is wearing a pastiche ensemble of several different styles," Lindsay said as the two blondes reached the end of the catwalk, Trent quickly running out to join them.

All three motioned towards the backstage curtain, and Jasmine could be heard saying "C'mon, get out there already!" A smack shortly followed, then a bellowing roar before Jasmine ran out to join her teammates, the angry sasquatch hot on her heels. His outfit consisted, as Lindsay said, of several different styles – blue and green vertically-striped board shorts; a yellow-and-black plaid v-necked sweater; a deep red sport coat; pink high-top sneakers; and the cowboy hat.

"The garments were carefully and artfully selected by the yeti himself," Lindsay said, cringing in terror as her team's model quickly tossed Jasmine and Trent and Zoey away again, "in a stylish display of wild instinct." The ape-man moved to grab her as she finished, but she quickly screamed and jumped off the catwalk.

The music stopped, and Sasquatchanakwa finally noticed the three judges just as the first one spoke up. "Eww, that's _hideous_!" Dakota said, cringing at the sight of the model before her. He paused and looked down at his clothes, grunting in confusion. "While some of those things could work on their own, together they just _clash_. He's so badly coordinated I almost wanna throw _up_!"

"True," Chris admitted, fanning himself again, "it doesn't exactly compliment Sasquatchanakwa's _monstrous_ visage."

Another trendy tune started playing and was soon joined by the flashing of cameras, the shot cutting back to the catwalk to show a group of men not seen in three seasons taking pictures of the poorly-dressed model.

"Hey, what are you guys doing?" Dakota objected. "I called you guys here to take photos of me and the _cast_ , not _this_!"

The paparazzi continued unabated, and soon the constant flashes began to irritate the subject of their attention. Sasquatchanakwa rubbed his eyes and growled in ever-increasing anger, then tore off his clothing as the shot cut away to the judges. "I mean," Dakota told Chef, "I don't wanna be _rude_ but he does _not_ -"

She was cut off when the yeti suddenly reached forward and grabbed her by the head, yanking her out of her seat with a startled yelp of "Hey, take it _easy_!". The shot zoomed out as an engine whirred to life, revealing that Sasquatchanakwa had also commandeered Chris' jetpack. With the captive heiress in his arms, he took off into the air.

"Hey, he took my _jetpack_!" the host quickly and angrily protested. The shot cut back to the ape-man and heiress as Dakota screamed, and Saquatchanakwa flew off to the foggy and ominous crags of Boney Island.

"Uh- _huh_...," Chris said blankly, still fanning himself. "Will Dakota survive?" he asked the camera, lifting up his shades as several deep and ominous chanted notes started to play. "And am I legally liable if she doesn't? Find out, after the break."

(Fade to Commercial and Back)

"What do you _mean_ I'm liable if the yeti eats Dakota?" Chris asked frantically, his cellphone now against his ear while he continued to fan himself. "It's not _my_ fault she's _delicious_!" The camera zoomed out to show the host on the Dock of Shame, the two teams watching him intently a few feet away. "Gotta go," he quickly told the person he was talking to, quickly transitioning into a laugh as he turned his attention back to the campers.

"He-he-hey! For our _next_ challenge, the two teams will...," he paused to think, "compete to _rescue_ Dakota!" he announced, causing the campers to scratch their heads and share confused and disbelieving looks with one another. "Yup, that's it! Everyone grab a canoe and head to Boney Island!" The campers promptly ran off down the dock, leaving Chris to laugh nervously. "It's all good!" he reassured himself.

/

The scene flashed ahead to the two teams rowing across the lake, the Maggots in a red canoe in the background with the Rats in green in the fore.

"Uggh, I can't believe we have to do this because the _Maggots_ thought using a sasquatch as their _model_ was a _good idea_ ," Courtney griped from the middle of their canoe.

"Hey, I'm sure they had their reasons," Harold said, sitting behind her. "I mean, it's not like they were _expecting_ the sasquatch to kidnap Dakota."

"Well they should have expected _something_ to go wrong," Courtney shot back.

"Maybe they just couldn't find anything smaller and had to make do," Gwen suggested, rowing directly in front of her roommate.

Courtney gasped indignantly. "Hey, who's side are you _on_?"

"The reasonable one," Gwen answered plainly as they entered into a fog bank, the music trilling tensely in the background.

The fog moved away as the shot cut to the island they were approaching, the skull-shaped mountain looming ominously as hollow, whooping cries echoed across the water.

/

A seamless cut ahead took the scene to Lindsay, Zoey, and Harold running through the slightly-barren woods of Boney Island one right after the other. "Dakota! Where are you?" the indie girl called, and the camera zoomed in on Harold's rather blank but thoughtful look.

xxx

"Hmm, it's been some time since I last talked to Zoey," Harold mused in the confessional. "Perhaps now is the time to see if she's really sorry about voting me off? Well, as long as Courtney isn't watching, at least," he added with a nervous glance from side to side.

xxx

Zoey was shown panting as she ran along with worry in her eyes, and the camera panned back to Harold as he sharply cleared his throat. Zoey didn't shown any reaction, so Harold frowned then made a louder "A- _hem_!"

Hearing that one, Zoey looked back and promptly slowed down as Harold ran up closer to her. "Oh, uh, hi Harold," the indie girl said nervously. "Did you, um, want something?"

"Just to say that I like what you've done with your hair, and also to apologize for being an epic jerk when we were facing that spider monster a while back," Harold said with a wide and expectant smile.

xxx

Zoey opened her confessional with a deep and nervous breath. "Okay, here's my chance," she told herself, clenching both fists in determination. "I just have to apologize to him for betraying his trust, helping get him voted out, and potentially ruining whatever chance of friendship we may have had. Easy, right?" she asked the camera with an anxious smile.

xxx

"I'm sorry too," Zoey said, rubbing her arm and not meeting his gaze. "I...I never should've let _Justin_ talk me into voting for you. I should've realized that he was just using me, and voted him out then. Can you forgive?" she asked, looking up at him with worry on her face.

"Absolutely," Harold grinned and nodded.

"Oh, thank you!" Zoey said, quickly enveloping him in a hug that caught him off-guard. She broke it after a few seconds, then said "So, does this mean that we can still be friends?"

"Heck yeah!" Harold grinned. "Although we should probably get back to searching for Dakota before my teammates see us," he added with a more serious expression.

"Oh, right, yeah," Zoey said with an embarrassed blush.

/

The scene skipped ahead again, showing Cameron coming to a halt with Harold, Zoey, and Lindsay right behind him. "Guys!" he called out panting, pointing up and ahead. "The sasquatch!" The camera panned up and ahead to a cliff with scaffolding set up on its face and Sasquatachanakwa sitting with Dakota at the top.

"Aww, I'm sorry for what I said before," the heiress said, patting the sulking ape-man on the back. "You did the best you could with what you had to work with! Just take this as a _learning_ experience so you can better show off your beauty next time!" As she spoke, the yeti rubbed the tears from his eyes and looked at her.

"So what's with the scaffolding?" Noah asked, the camera cutting back to ground-level to show that the rest of the cast had arrived.

"I'm turning Boney Island into my personal resort," Chris explained as he and Chef arrived. "The Health Department said it was unfit for human life, but, I sent in workers anyway," he continued, the cast giving each other incredulous looks. "Hmm...wonder where they went?" the host asked with an oddly sly smile.

/

A flash took the focus to a gruesome scene of human bones and workers' clothes scattered around some rocks in the forest. The camera panned to the right as gnawing sounds joined with a rapidly-rising horror tune, a trio of woolly beavers coming into view chewing on bones and wearing hard hats and pouring out a cup of hot coffee from a thermos.

/

"Don't hurt him!" Dakota called down to the campers. "He just has like a lot of body issues he's working through!"

"Awwww," Lindsay cooed sympathetically.

"I hear that," Jasmine nodded to herself before noticing the others staring at her. She quickly cleared her throat, then looked up at the clifftop. "Even so, you can't just go around kidnapping people who make you mad!" she declared in a strong, clear voice.

"Okay, why are we bothering to _reason_ with it when we should be taking it out?" Courtney questioned, walking forward and picking up a sledgehammer off the ground. She spun it around, then let it go and watched as it flew up and hit Sasquatchanakwa in the eye. The yeti quickly rubbed where he'd been hit, then lowered his hand and growled revealing the black eye he now sported.

"Hah! How's _that_ for a new fashion, you dirty _ape_?" Courtney taunted up at him. This only angered the sasquatch even more, causing him to jump up and down in such a rage that Courtney was shocked.

xxx

"Ooookay," Courtney told the outhouse camera with wide eyes, "in retrospect, maaaaybe insulting the four-hundred-pound _yeti_ was a bad _idea_."

xxx

The music turned dramatic was again as the raging ape-man jumped across the clifftop, his landings shaking through the stone and causing parts of the scaffolding to come lose – the right side of the top level, then the left side of the next, then right side of the level below that, and the left side of the very bottom level providing a convenient series of ramps up the side of the cliff. He then picked up the sledgehammer that had hit him, snapped its handle like a twig, and roared.

"Way to go, Noble Leader," Noah said as the rest of his team gasped.

The camera panned over to the Maggots, the four teens huddled together. "Alright, let's figure out how we're gonna do this," Jasmine started off, the perspective changing to an upward view from inside their circle.

"I think we should probably _avoid_ fighting it this time," Trent said, looking around at the girls. "I don't want _any_ of us getting hurt again."

"Well, I think I know what I did _wrong_ last time," Jasmine admitted, "but you're right that the rest of you shouldn't try to go toe-to-toe with him. I'm the only one who has a chance at getting up there and fending him off long enough to rescue Dakota, but I don't think me just rushing in like a cassowary on fire is gonna be enough."

"Well, what if we try to, I don't know, distract him or something?" Zoey suggested.

"Ohh, I can do that!" Lindsay said. "I'm _great_ at talking to people who are feeling down on themselves!"

"Are you sure?" Zoey asked her hesitantly. "We don't want you to get hurt for this."

"Don't worry, I can _totally_ handle this," Lindsay said in a reassuring manner. "I'll just go up the ramp thingies and talk to him and be _nice_."

Zoey and Trent shared a concerned look, but Jasmine smiled. "Well, if you're feeling confident, then I guess we'll give it a shot," she said. "While you're doing that, I'll climb up the side and grab Dakota."

"And what about me and Zoey?" Trent asked.

"You two just stay here and let us know if you think there's danger," Jasmine said.

"Right," Zoey nodded.

"Alright Maggots," Jasmine said as the camera cut back to a sideview of the team breaking apart, "let's move!" She and Lindsay ran off, leaving Trent and Zoey to share another wary look.

/

"Gosh, how are we gonna rescue Dakota before they do?" Harold asked as the focus cut over to the Rats watching their rivals put their plan into action.

"Perhaps we can use someone prettier than Dakota to lure the sasquatch away?" Cameron suggested as the background music took a dramatic turn.

"Isn't that pretty much what the Maggots are doing?" Noah questioned.

"Yes, but they're using _Lindsay_ ," Courtney said. "While she may be pretty, I don't think she's smart enough to keep that thing distracted for long."

"Okay, but if we're doing Cam's plan _we_ need someone pretty too," Gwen spoke up, "and since you just made the sasquatch hate your _guts_ , I don't know who that leaves us with." The stopped then, noticing all four of her teammates looking at her expectantly. "Oh no," she said, waving her hands and shaking her head, "no no no no _no_!"

Courtney smirked. "Okay boys, fetch me some make-up," she commanded.

Gwen groaned and palmed her face.

xxx

" _Me_? A _model_? Are they _serious_?!" Gwen asked the outhouse camera in sheer disbelief. "For the record," she said in a more serious tone, "I am _only_ doing this so they don't vote me off when we lose."

xxx

A low challenge tune began playing as Jasmine and Lindsay were shown beginning their ascent, the survivalist climbing the sheer rock to the right of the scaffolding while her more fashionable teammate took the scaffolding itself. Sasquatchanakwa quickly noticed the taller girl and picked up a barrel from a nearby pile, but his attention was quickly caught by Lindsay.

"Hey! Sasquatch!" she called out as she climbed up to the second tier of scaffold-ramps. "Look, we're really sorry about what happened! We never should have done any of it!" The camera cut up to the ape-man and his captive, both looking down at the approaching girl with interest. "The truth is, you're a snowflake! A really, _really_ , _big_ one, but still! The world just isn't ready for your beauty!"

Sasquatchanakwa smiled, and so did Dakota as she put a comforting hand on his arm.

The shot cut down to Trent and Zoey, who were watching with awe on their faces. "Wow, I can't believe she's actually doing it!" the musician said, cracking a smile.

"I know," Zoey said. "If you'd told me a week ago that something like this would be happening, I _never_ would've believed you. I mean, who could've guessed that someone like _Lindsay_ could talk down a yeti?"

"Guess it just goes to show that some people are more than what they seem," Trent said, laughing a little. "And after everything that's happened to us, I think that's something we've all realized. I think the four of us have become really good friends, don't you?" he asked Zoey, putting a hand on her shoulder.

Zoey smiled. "Yeah, I think so."

xxx

"Trent makes a good point, but it makes me worried about what'll happen if we lose again," Zoey confessed. "I mean, I really do think Jasmine and Lindsay and Trent are all my friends, but after what happened with Harold I just don't think I have it in me to vote any of them off. Like...after waiting so _long_ to finally make some friends I don't think I'm ready to say goodbye."

xxx

"Okay, you're sure this is going to _work_ , right?" Gwen asked with a hint of panic in her voice as the scene cut to the Rats, the goth's back to the camera as Courtney got to work with a powder puff in one hand and a make-up brush in the other. Harold, Cameron, and Noah watched with variable interest behind the bossy girl. "Because I don't wanna get all made-up like this only to have it not _work_ ," Gwen added.

"Relax, it'll be _fine_ ," Courtney reassured her. "I mean, _I_ look great, so it's only natural that I can make _you_ look great too, even _with_ your pasty complexion."

"That really doesn't make me feel better, Courtney," Gwen said, her panic rising.

Courtney paused and blushed sheepishly. "Oh, haha, right, sorry," she said.

"Well, I think you both look great," Cameron spoke up with a chipper tone. "I bet that sasquatch will love it!"

Harold and Noah smirked. "Yeah, especially if he has the same taste in girls as Cameron does," Harold said.

"Yeah-hey, wait!" Cameron started to nod, only to suddenly realize what his teammate had said.

"Hey, he only said the obvious," Noah said.

Courtney rolled her eyes. "Would you two stop picking on Cameron?" she scolded. "I need to _focus_ on getting this _right_."

"Sorry," Harold said, "I guess I couldn't help myself. And for the record, I too think you're doing a good job with Gwen's make-up."

Courtney puffed up and smiled proudly. "Thank you, Harold, I'm glad that you and Cameron have such good taste."

"Yeah, and I'm sure the yeti will too," Noah said dryly. "But not to rain on your parade, unless you hurry up and finish we aren't gonna get the chance to find out."

"I'm with Noah," Gwen spoke up, "can you hurry this up so we can get this over with?"

"Hold on, I'm almost done," Courtney said, the camera zooming in past Gwen to focus on her alone. The former CIT made a few more strokes with her brush, then put it away and did something with her hands instead. " _There_ ," she said slowly as a delighted smile formed on her face.

"Good," the goth said, still behind the camera. The sound of footsteps and Courtney's moving gaze signaled that Gwen had finally ran off towards the cliff.

/

The tense music resumed as the scene cut back to the cliff, both Lindsay and Jasmine just about at the top. "Okay, so, I was thinking that maybe you and I could have, like, a nice little chat about fashion and figure out the best way to make you look gorgeous!" Lindsay called out as she walked calmly up the final scaffold-ramp. "Do you think you'd like that?"

Sasquatchanakwa looked at Dakota, who smiled and nodded encouragingly, then the ape-man smiled and nodded at Lindsay.

"Good!" she said. "Only, umm, could we maybe do it in private? And also, like, _not_ look over there?" She hesitantly pointed to her right for a brief moment, and naturally both Sasquatchanakwa and Dakota turned their heads in that direction. "No, I said _not_ to look over there!" Lindsay immediately protested.

The camera panned over to the edge of the cliff as Jasmine grabbed on with one hand, then the other, then started to pull herself up. The sasquatch snarled angrily, then grabbed another barrel from the nearby pile. "No, wait!" Lindsay cried out in alarm, but it was too late – the barrel had been thrown, and hit Jasmine in the head just as she looked up and saw it coming. It broke over her, stunning the giant young woman but not knocking her off the cliff. A second barrel, however was enough to finish the job.

"Oops," Lindsay cringed, shrinking back even more when Sasquatchanakwa loomed over her angrily.

/

The scene cut back down to the ground, where Trent and Zoey were helping Jasmine back to her feet. "Oh no, I'm so sorry we weren't able to warn you in time, it all happened so _fast_!" Zoey fretted.

"I know," Jasmine groaned. "I'm completely disappointed in myself for not being able to do _anything_ to that guy."

"Don't worry," Trent said, "we know you did your be...est...?" The sound of footsteps caught his attention in mid-sentence, and the camera panned a bit to the left as he turned his head, catching a quick glimpse of a certain goth's legs running up the second level of scaffolding. "Wait, was that _Gwen_?" he asked in shock and disbelief.

/

A flash took the focus back to the top again, Sasquatchanakwa still looming angrily over Lindsay. "Okay, I know you're mad, but just hear me out, okay?" the blonde defended herself.

"I think you should listen to her," Dakota added, grabbing the ape-man by the arm and causing him to pause.

Just then Gwen ran on to the scene, finally revealing the new look Courtney had given her – a significantly less pale face all around, as well as lightly rouged cheeks, a bit of eyeshadow to match her lipstick, and her hair tied back into a short ponytail with two locks framing her face.

"Uhh...hi there...big...guy...," she said awkwardly, striking a fairly seductive pose with one hand on her hips and one on her head. "Wanna have a little...fun?"

The music stopped abruptly as Lindsay, Dakota, and Sasquatchanakwa all stared at the made-up goth. "Okay, I think that's _almost_ a good look, maybe?" Lindsay told her fellow blonde.

" _Maybe_ ," the heiress admitted, "but honestly it needs a _lot_ of work. Like, this is _exactly_ why you can't go halfway with makeovers." Both Lindsay and Sasquatchanakwa nodded in understanding.

"Okay, I am _officially_ done with this," Gwen scowled, clenching her first in irritation and storming forward to the surprise of the three fashion-lovers. She suddenly and swiftly kneed Sasquatchanakwa between the legs, shoved him over into the pile of barrels, and grabbed Dakota by the wrist. "Sorry Princess, but you've just been _rescued_ ," she informed the heiress.

"Awww, but I was just about to _do_ that!" Lindsay said.

"Sorry Lindsay," Chris announced as he flew up with his jetpack, "but you were just too slow. Which means, Team _Rat_ wins immunity!" Gwen smiled, and her teammates on the ground cheered. The camera panned from them to Trent, Jasmine and Zoey, all of whom groaned in disappointment.

"Hmm...," Dakota murmured, yanking her wrist free of Gwen's grip and checking out her face in a compact. "Not too _bad_ all things considered," she said before the goth snatched the mirror away from her. "Hey, I was using that!" she complained.

"Relax, I'll give it back once I see what Courtney _did_ to me," Gwen said, opening up the compact and looking herself over. "Yup, that's what I thought," she muttered in annoyance, thrusting the compact back into Dakota's hands and walking past Lindsay over to the edge of the cliff. "Hey Courtney!" she yelled down at her teammate. "Next time, don't make me look so _perky_ , would ya?"

"Fine, but the rest of us thought it looked good!" Courtney replied, causing Gwen to roll her eyes but smirk all the same.

"Welp, that about wraps things up," Chris said, "so let's head back to camp. Maggots," the shot cut down to Trent, Jasmine, and Zoey as they shared a nervous look, "you've got some voting to do."

xxx

"Oh no, this is _exactly_ what I was worried about," Zoey told the outhouse camera, anxious concern radiating from every part of her. "How can I bare to vote for _any_ one? What am I gonna _do_?" She lifted her legs and hugged her knees, burying her head in them to hide her sadness.

xxx

/

An owl hooted as the opening notes of the usual elimination theme began to play, the footage flashing ahead to a shot of the island at night then zooming in to the campfire pit. Unusually, both teams were present – the Rats on the left, and the Maggots on the right.

"Well _that_ was a complete fiasco!" Chris opened, him and Chef standing ready with their respective marshmallows. "Zoey, your choice of models left a _lot_ to be desired," he said, the indie girl in the front row frowning and looking down in shame. "And Jasmine," the camera moved behind Zoey, "you dropped the barrel on this one by not living up to your toughness." She, too, hung her head in shame.

"Of course, Lindsay could have salvaged the whole thing had she not slipped up and did the _opposite_ of distracting the sasquatch from her teammates," the host continued, the camera moving to the blonde sitting in front as she closed her eyes and nodded sadly. "And finally, Trent," Chris said, the camera moving to the back again as the sole male Maggot straightened up nervously. "I'm afraid you just didn't do much of _anything_ , but I don't expect that to be of much help right now. All of you messed up today, and because of it one of you is about to go home." The shot zoomed out to show the entire cast, the Rats watching their depressed rivals expectantly. "However," the host continued, picking up two marshmallows from his tray as the camera cut to his close-up, "it _won't_ be-"

" _Wait_!" a voice called out, causing the host to stop and the camera to zoom out – revealing that Lindsay had stood up. "I volunteer for elimination!"

Everyone gasped, even Chef and the Rats. "Lindsay, _why_?" Zoey asked in concern.

"Yeah, you don't have to do this!" Jasmine chimed in.

Lindsay shook her head. "Sorry, peeps, but I gotta," she told them. "This was a _fashion_ challenge and fashion is my thing, but instead of me leading us to victory I just messed up. It's only right that I go home."

"But-" Zoey said, reaching out to her friend in despair only to feel Jasmine's hand on her shoulder. She looked back, and the survivalist shook her head sadly.

Lindsay took a breath, then stepped forward firmly. "I've made my decision."

"Yeah, I noticed," Chris said blandly as Chef took out the toxic marshamllow. "You were gonna be eliminated anyway since the only person who _didn't_ vote for you was _Zoey_ , who voted for herself. But if you wanna be all _noble_ about it then okay, I guess."

He shrugged noncommittally, and Lindsay frowned. "Oh...," she said, casting a brief glance at her former teammates.

"Sorry," Trent said, sheepishly rubbing the back of his head.

"Well...I guess this is goodbye, then," Lindsay said as the sombre farewell tune began to play. The toxic marshmallow bounced off her head and she winced, but kept her smile and continued on. "But don't worry," she said as she was led away by Chef, "saying bye isn't so bad. Because really, it's just a 'hi', with a 'b'!" Her former teammates, including Harold, were shown waving her off with sad smiles, and even the other Rats were shown watching somberly.

"And with _that_ special moment out of the way," Chris said with a smile, "now for something even _more_ special. Toxic Rats, you're probably wondering why I asked you to sit in on this elimination." The shot cut to the team of five, all of them watching the host with anxious suspicion. "I'll need a _volunteer_ from each team," he told them.

" _I'll_ do it," Harold said, standing up proudly from the Rats' back row next to Gwen and Noah.

"Me too," Trent added with a calm smile.

"Pack your baa~ags!" Chris told them impishly.

Zoey gasped. "You're hurling _them_ , too?!" she asked in shock and horror.

"Nah," the host waved dismissively, "I don't give people time to pack before they get hurled! These two are _switching teams_!"

Everyone gasped but the two boys in question, who just smiled and walked towards their 'new' teammates, exchanging a high-five as they passed each other. Harold sat next to Jasmine, who smiled and punched him lightly in the arm. "Great to have you back, mate. And sorry for almost eliminating you back then," she said with a more apologetic tone. "I hope you can forgive me."

"I already have," Harold grinned, earning smiles from both Jasmine and Zoey.

The shot cut to Trent as he took a seat next to Gwen, and the two immediately locked eyes and smiled. "Well, I guess we're finally on the same side," he told her.

"Yeah," Gwen replied. "I look forward to working with you."

"Same," the musician chuckled. "Glad you went back to your old look, too. The new one just wasn't _you_ , y'know?"

"Tell me about it," the goth laughed.

The camera panned left from them to show Noah watching with a single raised eyebrow on an otherwise bored face. The shot then zoomed outward to focus on Cameron, one of his eyebrows raised as well but with a more thoughtful expression. And finally, the camera to the right onto Courtney, who briefly looked at the two with narrowed and suspicious eyes before looking forward and pursing her lips.

/

The scene flashed to the docks, Lindsay sitting sadly in the bucket of the Hurl of Shame. The sombre farewell resumed once more as Chris approached her. "Any last words before your ride to _loserdom_?" he asked in a taunting manner.

"Yeah," she nodded, the perspective moving behind her as she looked up and saw all four of her former teammates standing behind the host. "I hope everyone remembers that friends are worth _way_ more than money," she told them with a happy smile, the camera zooming in on Zoey as she sadly brought her hand to one of the braids Lindsay had given her.

"Yeah, no they're not," Chris interrupted with a laugh, abruptly catapulting the golden-hearted young woman off into the night. "And on that note, we say goodbye to our foxiest player," he turned and told the camera as the series' capstone theme began to play. "Who will be the next loser hurled? How much can we humiliate them first? And what will become of our new-ish teams? Find out next time, on Total! Drama! _Rrrrevenge_ , of the _Island_!"

/

The music became tense and eerie as the scene cut back to Boney Island, the fog parting to reveal its skull-shaped centerpiece as a hollow cry rung through the air. The shot cut to a small campfire with three hardhat-wearing woolly beavers...and Izzy.

"Well," she sighed, stretching her arms above her head, "it's been fun hanging out with you guys and all, but I should _probably_ get going." The beavers started growling viciously, but she just smiled. "Hey, guys, I know," she said dismissively, "but I don't want my roommate to _worry_ , y'know? It can be pretty dangerous out here at night!"

The beavers snarled and pounced at her, but she deftly jumped over then and off into the woods. The shot cut back out to the face of Boney Island, the wild child's laughter now ringing through the air.

(Fade to Credits)

* * *

 **Author's Note - Post Script**

So long Lindsay, you will be missed. As some of you may have guessed, she was the person originally slanted to be eliminated in episode three before I decided that she needed a better chance to develop. Thus, I changed things around and moved the first team swap up as well as Leonard and Justin's eliminations, and boy am I happy I did so. Lindsay has such a golden heart, and I'm glad I was able to show it off these past couple of weeks. But, ultimately, her role in the story was done, and she went out with nobility.

Swapping Trent to the Rats here was obvious, I think, as it'll allow some more progress with his and Gwen's relationship. Swapping Harold back to the Maggots, however, may seem odder. To be honest, it was always gonna be like this - giving Harold a breather to help develop Noah, have some fun with the Rats, and force Zoey and Jasmine to feel guilty. Then when he forgave them, he got to rejoin the team. I don't know, it makes sense to me.

Also, no note from Noah this week, or any real sneakiness for that matter. I figured it would be best to take a bit of a break from it, especially since I knew going in that Noah wasn't gonna be in danger of elimination or even being on the losing team. Plus, he'd probably want to lay low for a bit anyway, so the others don't get suspicious of so many mysterious notes running around. Maybe I should have at least given him a confessional or something to that effect, but I suppose it's too late for that now.

Anyway, let me know what you thought of this week's episode, and I'll see you all next week.

\- Fangren

* * *

 **Appendix: TSROTI Eliminated Contestants**

Cody - (13th Place)

Izzy - (12th Place | Still AWOL)

Leonard (11th Place)

Justin (10th Place)

Lindsay (9th Place)


	7. Chapter 7 - A Mine is a Terrible Thing

**Author's Note**

And thus, dear readers, we officially arrive at the halfway point of this season. Five people have already been eliminated, and six more will fall before we reach the finale. I hope you're all getting excited, because things are gonna heat up from here on out.

But for now, it's time to answer last week's reviews.

 **SilverWriter0927:** Nice name change. And yeah, Gwen and Trent being on the same team means good things for them, although I do hesitate to compare them to Zoke.

 **Gage the Hedgehog:** Thank you, as always.

 **Tokusatsu-31st Century:** I'm glad you like Gwent! And yeah, Lindsay stepped up to the challenge last week and let her team down, so it's only natural she'd be willing to take the blame.

 **CVluvFoxy:** Ah, I see. Yeah, last week was a pretty obvious place to eliminate her, and I'm glad you enjoyed the direction I took her in. Same with the team swap, and Dakota's cameo. As for the other stuff...well, you'll find out soon enough. And by which I mean you already know, because I forgot to include this reply originally. Sorry.

 **Call Me Ishmael:** Well, I'm glad I was able to develop her so well - people being sad about a character's departure is a good sign, especially since I wasn't too certain how to handle Lindsay going into this season. It really makes my decision to keep her around worth it. Not much else for me to say - I'm happy you're enjoying nearly all of the character, though I will say that Cameron, overall, has probably been the hardest for me to really get a handle on so it's no surprise that you're not sure where I'm going with him.

 **Zak Saturday:** Thank you, I hope you enjoy this week's chapter as well.

 **StayOuttaMyShed:** Mmm, yes, I would like to write Lindsay again in the Shuffledverse though I don't know if it'll be next season - there's just so many possible heroes from this season's cast to choose from. I'm happy you're enjoying Harold being Harold, and his apology (and general interactions) with Zoey. Them being on the same team again is gonna make things interesting, just like Trent now being stuck with Gwen and Courtney. And Noah...well, who knows?  
And as for your predictions regarding the next couple eliminations...well, since I've actually finished episode 8 already and thus know for sure what happens, I can say that I'm looking forward to seeing your reaction to the next couple weeks.

 **Animation Adventures:** Jeez, I'm glad you (and Sarcasm is a Habit) pointed that out to me so quickly so I could change it. I'm pretty sure I was thinking ahead a little too much, knowing that Lindsay was getting eliminated last week and thus removing her from the list instead of Justin. Fortunately I was able to fix it quickly. Anyway, I'm glad you enjoyed the Rats' model choice, and fashion as well. It was a bit of a repeated gag, as you mentioned, but it works well - showing the same thing as canon, then subverting the canon choice into something that actually fits the Shuffled situation. I'm glad you enjoyed the swap, and it certainly does open up a number of possible developments, especially once they get down into the mine. It's safe to say that this week's episode is gonna be exciting, for reasons both related to and independent of the season's plot.

 **acosta perez jose ramiro:** Yup, you're spot on with Lindsay - she's a ditz, but she does get people. Thank you for the review, as always.

 **Sarcasm is a Habit:** Ah, I see what you meant by Harold writing the notes now, thanks for clarifying. I'll agree that last week was about the right time to eliminate Lindsay; I'm happy with where I was able to take her, and while she does have the potential to go far in a season it just isn't her time to shine. I'm happy you liked the swap; I wasn't sure how well it would go over considering that Harold had started out on the Maggots anyway, but it seems like people really like him, Jasmine, and Zoey together. And as for Izzy...well, I'm happy you enjoyed her cameos last week as well. Oh, and thank you as well for being the second to let me know about my slip-up with the remaining cast last week.

 **OMAC001:** Thanks, I'm glad to hear it.

 **moka evans:** Thank you, figuring out how to get Sasquatchanakwa mad enough to rampage without Brick around was difficult but I'm happy with what I came up with. Having Sam absent was similar, though less so since the video game withdrawal bits weren't as central to the plot (aside from the Donkey Kong homage, which I guess was what the canon episode was all about setting up). I'm not sure why you thought Noah would be the natural makeover choice over Gwen, but whatever. I am glad you're looking forward to seeing how Trent being on the Rats works out for them all!

 **ashDanLand:** I'm glad to hear you liked it! Especially your thought that Zoey is being a good friend. And yeah, Dakota replacing Lindsay's cameo was pretty obvious so I'm not surprised you thought it was going to happen way back in season one.

 **Bruno 14:** Good to hear, even your sadness at Lindsay being gone - it means I did her justice as a character. As for your suggestion about using submitted OCs for a potential Shuffled RR...sorry, but that's not really my style. I'd feel too much pressure to conform to exactly what their creators had in mind for them, and I'd probably end up feeling like the story wasn't entirely my own, which is something I like to avoid.

 **PizzaTheBomb:** Mmm, yeah, not every eliminated contestant is gonna react the same way, simply because they aren't all the same. So it's only natural that some, like Lindsay, are going to be good sports about it, and even accept that they should be the one going home. It adds a nice layer of diversity to the cast. And yeah, in canon the Maggots dressed up a maggot while the Rats got ol' Sasquatchanakwa, but that wasn't gonna work for my purposes so I decided to switch things up. Anyway, I hope you enjoy the rest of the season!

 **The Misguided Angel of Death:** Thank you! It means a lot to me when I hear that someone is genuinely sad to see a character go; like you said, it means I've done a good job with her. And yeah, both the swap and the mines are gonna lead for some interesting situations this week...but you'll have to read on to find out more!

 **P. T. Piranha:** Well okay then, fair enough. I'm glad you're enjoying Harold's switching fate and Noah staying in the background.

 **Explorer of the Unknown:** I feel like I've said it a lot today, but I'm really happy with people's reactions to Lindsay's elimination. It really makes me feel like I did a great job with her. And likewise, I'm glad you felt that the Maggots were a pretty tight-knit group (Justin aside); it's something that I've been trying to do with them and I'm happy it's coming through to people. Regarding next season's cast, I will say that I'm going to do my best to make sure everyone deserves to be there - although to be honest, that doesn't cut out as many possibilities as I'd like, in this season's cast. There's just so many interesting possibilities!  
I'm glad you're enjoying Harold so far, though you do make a good point about my unwillingness to get him and Zoey in a relationship, as well as my tendency to throw curve balls - for instance, I'm not gonna bind myself to making the finale Brains vs Brawn - the finalists could be anyone left in the game right now. Harold's friendship with Trent is something I am interested in exploring a little bit, though I'm not sure if I'll go in heavy with the Drama Brothers references. But who knows? And with Trent on the Rats now instead of Harold, the balance of power is certainly shifting...it's been interesting figuring out exactly how Noah, Cameron, and Courtney should react to this change.  
And all that said...I hope you enjoy what happens next!

 **Guest:** Yeah, I suppose the irony is kind of obvious - it's also why I'd originally planned on having Justin eliminated last week in the original plan for the season. Regardless, I'm glad you enjoyed Courtney's fashion sense and her friendship with Cameron.

 **This guy:** ...yeah, no, I wasn't gonna do anything like that regardless of who was put on what teams.

 **Star Saber21:** Yup, that's kind of what I was going for (though it was more that she was the most fashionable one there). And yeah, I don't think either Trent or Harold is really complaining about the swap. I hope you keep enjoying the series!

 **DSX62415:** :D

 **C. DreadsFanfic. netBUM:** Yup, it was just her time to go like you said. Still, I'm glad I decided to keep her on for as long as I did, it really let her shine. Not sure if she'll be back next season, though - there's a lot of heroes I gotta pick from. As for Zoey, I did intentionally have it seem like she'd consider quitting; and as for her hooking up with Harold...who knows? I'm glad you liked Cameron getting teased a bit, as well as just Harold in general. I hope you enjoy what happens next!

 **I. M. Poik:** Yup, Dakota was the natural choice for last week's cameo. And as for Gwen taking Jo's role, well, somebody had to finish things up, and Gwen seemed like the best choice. Noah...will return to his more active behind-the-scenes works when I feel he'd feel the need to do so. And as for the possible relationship in TSPI...well, I can promise that it's not gonna be a screenhog. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this week's episode!

 **link9753:** Yeah, it really does seem like a natural place to eliminate her, doesn't it? And as for this week's hurl... well, you'll just have to read on and find out.

 **FOWLKON:** I'm glad you enjoyed Lindsay's boot episode, and all that she did in it. And yeah, Gwen is definitely more of a Perky Goth than Crimson and Ennui, but I don't think Gwen really sees herself as such. And I'm glad you enjoyed the jokes involving Courtney. The swap will certainly change things up, and as for your predictions regarding the next boot...well, I'll be interested in seeing your thoughts after it happens.

And that's that! Here's the usual stuff before we get to what you're really here for: the **_poll in my profile will remain up for the time being,_** and as always **_a TVTropes page for this series exists_** , and as per usual with such things, could always use more work. I thoroughly appreciate those who've already been working on it, and look forward to seeing what you all add next.

The current teams are as follows:

Toxic Rats: Cameron, Courtney, Gwen, Noah, Trent

Mutant Maggots: Jasmine, Zoey, Harold

Looks like there's some trouble brewing, so get ready for some excitement. Enjoy!

\- Fangren

* * *

 **Episode 7 – A Mine is a Terrible Thing to Waste**

"Last time, on Total Drama Revenge of the Island!" the unseen host opened on a stock shot of the island before the recap montage began. "We saw how _clueless_ our players are when it comes to fashion," he said over clips of the Rats' business casual mutant rat and the Maggots' disastrous attempt to bring a self-dressed Sasquatchanakwa out on to the runway. "And how _useless_ they are when it comes to rescues!" he added over Lindsay's unintentional tipping-off of the ape-man to Jasmine's arrival at the top of the cliff and Gwen's half-hearted and ultimately failed attempt to seduce him.

"In the end, although _all_ of the Maggots messed up," a few clips were played in quick succession showing Zoey pointing out the Sasquatchanakwa, her and Trent and Jasmine getting thrown through the air over Lindsay, and Lindsay cowering in fear at the top of the cliff as the ape-man loomed over her angrily, "it was _Lindsay_ who pointlessly volunteered for the toss-a-roo." Lindsay stood up to volunteer, and then was escorted away by Chef. "And after that, Harold and _Trent_ got tossed on to opposite teams," Chris added over clips of the two boys volunteering, then high-fiving each other as they walked over to their new teams.

"Who will thrive, and who won't survive?" Chris asked the camera, the recap footage ending to show him standing at the end of the Dock of Shame. Before he could finish, however, a sudden strong wind and the sound of a rotor signaled the arrival of a helicopter.

"This is the Department of Environmental Protection!" a voice called out, the camera zooming out to show a RCMP helicopter hovering a few feet away from the host. "You're _busted_ , McLean!"

"Aww, _man_!" the host griped. "Meddling tree-huggers..." With a scowl on his face he reached into his pocket, and pulled out a walkie-talkie. "Launch Operation Doomsday!" he ordered. "Repeat, Operation Doomsday! Over!" A short hiss of static ended the message, and he turned a smile to the camera. "What _is_ Operation Doomsday, you ask? Find out right here, right now, on Total! Drama! Revenge, of the Island!" As the shot cut outward as usual, another pair of RCMP helicopters swooped down to join the first over the dock.

xxx

(Fade to Opening Theme)

 _Dear Mom and Dad, I'm doin' fine;_

 _You guys are on my mind!_

 _Ya asked me what I wanted to be,_

 _And now I think the answer is plain to see!_

 _I wanna be...famous!_

 _I wanna live close to the sun!_

 _Well pack your bags, 'cause I've already won!_

 _Everythin' to prove, nothin' in my way;_

 _I'll get there one day._

 _'Cause I wanna be...famous!_

 _(Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

 _I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

 _I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

(Fade to Episode)

xxx

The scene opened in the boys' side of the Rats' cabin, a serene tune playing as Trent stood up, stretched his arms, and slung his guitar onto his back.

"Let me guess," Noah spoke up, lounging on his top bunk with a book in hand, "off to woo a gothy beast?"

Trent chuckled. "Yeah, you caught me," he admitted.

"Well, don't let _us_ stop you," Noah said, motioning vaguely down to Cameron who was rubbing lotion onto his hands. "Or _Courtney_ , for that matter. Since you and Gwen are on the same team now she can't complain about you two spending time together. Should make hooking up a whole lot _easier_ if you ask me."

"Hah, I hope so," the musician smiled before turning more serious. "Hey, you guys probably know Gwen a little better than I do. Do you think she's really in to me?"

"Well," Cameron considered, "Gwen's behavior _is_ consistent with what I've read about human attraction."

"So in other words," Noah interpreted, "it's a big fat 'probably'. But hey, neither of us has had a date in our _lives_ so I'd say just go for it, man."

Trent smiled. "Yeah, I think I will. Thanks, guys," he said before walking out of the cabin.

Once he was gone, Cameron slid off his bed and walked forward. "He seems pretty nice," he commented to his sole remaining roommate.

"Yup," Noah said, leaning back and looking back into his book.

Cameron stepped outside onto the cabin's porch, took a deep breath, and smiled.

xxx

"Even though I actually haven't been out here for that long, I think I've actually become fairly comfortable with living outside my bubble," Cameron told the confession camera. "Sure, the challenges are often as terrifying as they are life-threatening, but I've managed to survive all of them so far. My team may have had a rough start, but I think we're really doing well right now – Courtney and Gwen have both been _really_ encouraging in their own ways, Noah can be difficult to talk to but I appreciate his honesty, and although I had my concerns about Trent joining the team it appears that he's getting along well with all of us. I'm _very_ appreciative of the people I've met out here. Well _most_ of them anyway, " he corrected with an almost sheepish look. "Still, I'm confident that I've earned my place among them."

xxx

The scene cut outside the Rats' cabin as a helicopter flew by overhead. The shot panned down to Cameron as he stepped off the cabin porch, then the camera zoomed out to show Gwen and Trent sitting next to each other on a nearby log. They smiled at one another as Trent began to play his guitar, and after a moment Cameron moved on in the direction of the mess hall. The focus lingered on the cabin, however, as Courtney stepped out of the girls' side and quickly noticed Gwen and Trent. She pursed her lips at them for a moment, then took a breath and moved on.

As she did, the camera panned left onto Noah, now standing in the doorway of the boys' side. He raised an eyebrow, then shrugged noncommittally.

xxx

"Let's see now," Noah began his confessional, tapping his chin and looking thoughtful. "We should be about halfway through this thing, meaning the teams are probably gonna merge soon – and I need a _plan_ for when that happens. Harold's back in good with the Maggot girls so I think they'll stick together, and Gwen and Trent are practically _drooling_ over each other so there's that, too. Trent will probably want to side with his old teammates...but Gwen might want to side with the rest of us _Rats_. Hmm," he crossed his arms. "I guess I just need to get in good with both sides, which should be easy enough, but until then I need to make sure I don't get the short straw if we _lose_. And that means I need to be in good with at least two of my other teammates...the _lovebirds_ will be the easiest, but there's no reason I can't work on the others too."

xxx

Noah, too, stepped down from the cabin porch and joined up with Courtney who was standing near Gwen and Trent.

"Hey, are you two gonna be here long?" she asked. "I don't want you two missing breakfast."

"Relax, we'll be there in a bit," Trent said calmly.

Courtney opened her mouth to say something, but paused upon feeling Noah's hand on her shoulder. "C'mon, let's leave them to their _fun_ and go score the pick of the slop," he said, ushering away the team's self-declared leader and earning a smile from both goth and musician. He shot the pair a finger pistol, then turned back forward and walked alongside Courtney.

"I don't get how you can be so... _calm_ about those two," Courtney whispered as they walked past a pair of white interns, one male and one female, frantically dragging luggage from the opposite direction.

"And I don't get why _you're_ so hung up about them," Noah replied dryly. "Especially since, if I remember right, you said you weren't going to."

"Well...," Courtney said, looking down and mashing her fingers together anxiously, "I'm just...a little _worried_ , okay? They're practically a couple, so all they need is one more vote and they'll control the team!"

"Is that so?" Noah said in his usual bored tone, raising an eyebrow as he and Courtney reached the steps of the mess hall. "I'll keep that in mind," he added, going ahead through the open doorway and earning a lightly indignant gasp from his teammate.

/

"Alright, time for another _gag_ -fest of a meal!" Noah said as he and Courtney walked into the hall, Cameron and the three Maggots standing around looking confused at the table closest to the meal counter. "What's on the menu?"

"Nothing," Cameron answered. "Chef's not here, and neither is breakfast!"

"Wait, what's going on?" Gwen asked as she and Trent walked in, confusion on their faces.

"No _breakfast_ ," Courtney answered with a hint of outrage in her voice.

"Whoa, really?" Trent said, raising an eyebrow and walking over to the counter. "Jeez, you're not kidding," he said after looking around a little. "I guess we're just gonna have to make it ourselves."

He walked into the kitchen, and the perspective changed to show the inside of a refrigerator as Jasmine opened the door and looked inside. "Well, there's no food in the fridge," she called out after looking over the bare shelves, the background music becoming plodding and mysterious.

"Nothing in the cupboards, either!" Zoey added after opening a cupboard door.

"We should check in the walk-in freezer!" Chef Hatchet suggested through a small open window, quickly hurrying away as the camera zoomed out to reveal Harold standing nearby.

"Hey, good idea!" the dweeb said brightly, pounding his palm in realization. "Our meal must lie in the _freezer_!" He hurried across the room and threw open the freezer door, stepping inside as a cold mist poured out. "Hey guys, that oddly familiar but disembodied voice was right," he called out after a second, "there's _meat_ in here!"

The others promptly ran in to join him...and a shutter door slid down behind them. They gasped, and the camera cut outside to show a truck driven by Chef starting up and moving away from a hole in the side of the mess hall.

" _Challenge time_ , suckas!" he cackled, sliding open a small view slot and grinning at the camera and campers inside the cargo hold.

"This is highly unorthodox!" Cameron complained, holding on to a swinging piece of meat as most of the others tried to keep their balance in the moving vehicle and Jasmine and Gwen began to breath heavily.

"Oh no," the survivalist moaned, "I can't be trapped _again_!"

"Where are you _taking_ us?" Zoey asked Chef, steadying her teammate while Trent held on to Gwen.

" _You'll_ see," Chef answered with a devilish smile and snicker, sliding the viewing slot shut...and jamming his finger in the process, causing him to yelp in pain.

/

A flash took the scene to what appeared to be the entrance of a mineshaft. On a ledge to the right was a bulldozer and some other pieces of machinery, while to the left was not only a pile of toxic waste barrels, but also a widescreen television showing what seemed like a live feed of the host. The Chef-driven truck backed up to the entrance and with a grin the hulking driver pushed a button that caused the hold to lift, dumping the campers out onto the dirt.

"Good. You're here. _Finally_ ," Chris said, giving them a quick look of annoyance before shifting into his typical smile. "Today's challenge is to find a Golden Chris statue in your team color," he raised his left hand and a statuette with a green base appeared with a flash and a chime, then did the same with a red-based statuette on his right, "hidden _somewhere_ in this old abandoned mine." He motioned to the mine entrance, and the two statuettes disappeared with another flash. "First team to get theirs back, wins!"

"Awesome, sounds pretty straightforward if you ask me," Harold said, sharing a happy nod with Zoey.

"Well not me," Jasmine said, shivering anxiously. "I don't _wanna_ go down a deep, dark, confined little _hole_ in the ground."

"Me neither," Gwen said, also starting to panic. "Seriously, Chris," she said, rushing over and grabbing the sides of the widescreen, "you can _not_ make us go down-"

She was cut off when heavy orange backpack was tossed on her, forcefully knocking her to the ground. Trent gasped and looked towards the truck with the others, the shot cutting over to show Chef – now in his hazmat suit – tossing the backpacks out of the back of the truck.

"Don't worry," Chris told them, "there are enough packs for everyone."

The shot cut outward just as Trent was tossed his, revealing that all the others had received packs as well. Most were lifting them with little trouble, though Noah, Harold, and especially Cameron were all struggling and Gwen was still lying on the ground.

"What, are these things filled with _cement_ or something?" Noah griped, reaching to open the pack's main flap.

"Up-up-up, no peeking!" Chris admonished with a wag of his finger. "Those 50 lb bags are _purely_ for your torment," he explained, "and _my_ amusement. _Enjoy_."

Cameron was shown crouched down on the ground, having given up trying to lift the pack in order to root through a side pocket and pull out a small metal armband with a bright green triangular patch on front. "Chemical badges?" he asked in concern. "Why do we need to measure our exposure to toxic waste?"

"No reason," the host said with an impish shrug. "Except that I rented the mine out to store hazardous material." The campers all gasped.

"Are you _crazy_?!" Gwen asked in utter shock, finally getting back on her feet.

" _No_ ," Chris answered smugly, "which is why _I'm_ in a studio right now!" Both teams immediately protested. " _Relax_ ," the devilish host told them, "it's _perfectly_ safe. For thirty minutes," he clarified as an inset of a timer reading 30:00 appeared on the screen next to him. "When your badge turns orange," he pointed at the inset as it showed the green triangle that was on the armbands turning orange, "you have fifteen minutes left. Red is your five minute warning," the triangle turned red, "and, if you see a skull and crossbones," the entire triangle was replaced by a flashing skull and crossbones, "we'll dedicate this episode to you! But _no way_ is it gonna come to that. I sent one of the interns down there for forty minutes," he pointed at his wristwatch as the entire on-screen inset disappeared, "and they're gonna be _fine_!... _ish_..."

"Now move it, peeps!" he told the cast, the camera cutting back outward to show them all standing with their packs.

"Could you at _least_ give us a hint about where to find the statues?" Zoey asked.

"Funny story," Chris said with an impish smile and sideways glance as the background music became tense and trilling, "the statues have gone missing! Someone, or some _thing_ down there must've taken them."

"I," Jasmine started, pausing to gulp nervously, "I don't suppose it's nice and open and well-lit down there, is it?"

"It's a _mine_ , so no," Chris answered, his smile almost mocking. "Pitch black and _narrow_ , all the way." Both Gwen and Jasmine squirmed anxiously. "There are flashlights and fireflies inside," he added, "first come, first serve. Anywho, time's a-wasting, and so are your healthy blood cells. So _go_!"

/

The scene cut inside the mine entrance as the Maggots ran in with Jasmine in the lead.

"Okay," she told herself with a forced smile, stopping right before a small elevator with an open front, "just gotta be quick about this so I can go back outside. Just. Gotta. Be qui-" She absentmindedly started to pound on the wall of the shaft with her fist as Zoey and Harold joined her, but before she could finish her mantra the mine began to rumble and rocks fell down from the ceiling, burying her and her teammates.

Courtney, Cameron, and Noah ran past them, and they were followed by Trent leading a very anxious Gwen. "Aww, jeez," the musician told his former teammates, who had poked their heads out of the rubble, "I wish I could stay and help."

"Hurry _up_!" Courtney called shrilly, forcing Trent to move on with Gwen.

"You're okay, you're safe, I'm here with you," he told the goth calmly as he steadily led her into the elevator with their teammates, Courtney pursing her lips and closing the short gate as soon as she could.

"We got the flashlights!" Cameron said, picking up a pair of the devices from the elevator floor. An ominous creaking cut off any possible celebration, however, and moments later a cable snapped, dropping the elevator down its shaft. All five of the Rats screamed, but none as loudly as Gwen.

They landed with a resounding crash, and the scene cut down to the total darkness at the bottom of the shaft. A few pained groans rose up, followed by Trent saying "Is everyone okay?"

"I _think_ so," Courtney replied first.

" _No_!" Gwen whimpered out next.

"My _spine_...!" Noah groaned third.

"The flashlights!" Cameron finished, turning one on and revealing the broken elevator and scores of waste barrels scattered around the five fallen teens.

Courtney quickly picked up the second flashlight, turned it on, and looked around. "Guys, I think I see a tunnel," she said, the camera panning left to show both a normal mineshaft and a more natural-looking tunnel next to it. "Do we take it?"

She was answered by a high-pitched squealing that echoed through the tunnels and caves, lasting long enough for all five Rats to look around in terror.

"Oh no no," Gwen said, standing up in a panic, "what was _that_?!"

"A good reason not to stay _here_ ," Noah answered, getting up and making a dash towards the more natural-looking tunnel. His teammates followed shortly after him, though Trent once again had to lead Gwen forward by the hand.

/

The squeal faded away as the scene cut back to the top of the elevator shaft, where the three Maggots had managed to get themselves free of the rubble.

"Well, the elevator probably isn't coming up anytime soon," Harold commented, looking down the shaft.

"So...we're going to have to climb down that narrow little shaft to proceed, then?" Jasmine asked nervously. "Alrighty..."

"Well, at least it won't be _dark_ ," Zoey said, picking up a large glass jar full of small, glowing fireflies.

"Yes, good," Jasmine said, her breaths becoming quicker as she tried to reassure herself. "Great! We can see exactly how...," she gulped, "how _cramped_ everything down there really is."

Zoey put a nervous finger to her lip, and Harold stepped forward and took the firefly jar from her. "I'll go ahead and light the way," he told the girls. "Then Jasmine should come next, and then Zoey, you bring up the rear to make sure Jasmine gets down okay."

"Right," Zoey nodded.

"Right," Jasmine echoed with barely-contained panic. "Good thinking, mate. Let's...let's get this over with, shall we?"

"Naturally," Harold said in a confident tone, holding the cable with his left hand and the firefly jar under his right arm. "Excelsiooaaaahhh!" he cried as he jumped into the shaft and slid down that cable, his declaration quickly turned into a pained shout. "Cable burn!"

Zoey and Jasmine shared a nervous look. "Well...I'm sure he's okay," the indie girl said tentatively before the sound of a crash made both of them wince.

"Awhawhaw, my _biscuits_ ," Harold's pained groan echoed up through the shaft, causing his teammates to share another wary look.

/

A flash took the scene back down to the bottom of the shaft, Harold now lying on top of the broken elevator with his hands covering his groin. Jasmine and Zoey hesitantly slid down above him, then hopped off – the indie girl to Harold's side, and the survivalist to the floor of the shaft.

"You alright?" Zoey asked, bending over her fallen friend and offering her hand.

"Uh-huh," he said pitifully, taking her hand and allowing himself to be pulled to his feet.

"Good. Now where's the fireflies?" Zoey followed up.

"Over there," Harold answered, pointing to the ground. The camera panned down and zoomed in on the upturned jar, then zoomed out as Zoey picked it up.

"Okay, looks like we made it down in one piece. Right, Jasmine?" she said, looking expectantly to her right. "Jasmine?"

"I'm okay," the girl in question answered a little too quickly as the shot quick-panned over to her hunched over shivering in fright. "Just...just give me a moment..."

Zoey and Harold shared a concerned look, then walked forward. "It's okay, we're here," Zoey said calmly. "Deep breath in," she instructed, and Jasmine inhaled deeply. "Now blow out the candle," the indie girl continued, sticking a solitary finger out in front of her teammate. Jasmine blew out her breath on it, and Zoey smiled. "Better?" Jasmine nodded silently with a bit of anxiety still on her face. "Good, now let's keep moving," she said, turning and leading Jasmine and Harold towards the left.

/

The Rats were huffing and panting as the scene cut back to them entering a slightly wider portion of the tunnels. Cameron and Courtney were still in front with the flashlights, Noah was right behind them, and Trent continued to bring up the rear with Gwen.

"That's it, just take deep breaths," Trent said to the heavy-breathing goth. "Don't think about where we are right now, just concentrate on moving _forward_."

"I'm _trying_...," Gwen muttered pitifully, clenching her eyes shut in displeasure. "But it's just so _hard_!"

"I know. But look at how far you've already gotten," he told her. "You're _strong_ , Gwen. You can make it through this."

Gwen took a few more breaths, and seemed to calm down a little. "You're right...thanks," she said.

"Are you...gonna be okay, Gwen?" Courtney asked in concern, the musician and goth looking up to see she had lingered back and allowed Cameron and Noah to go ahead.

"I...maybe?" the goth answered uncertainly. "For now?"

"...good," Courtney said, "because I don't really think we can afford to turn back."

"R-right...," Gwen said nervously, following Courtney as she turned and walked forward again. Trent watched them go with concern still on his face, and hurried to catch up to them.

The focus cut over to Cameron and Noah, who were inspecting another pair of tunnels as their teammates rejoined them – a normal-looking mineshaft on the left, and a jagged-edged hole on the right.

"So, what's the situation?" Courtney asked the boys.

"We've got a choice to make," Cameron said, turning around to face her.

"Not _much_ of one if you ask me," Noah muttered, earning a confused look from Courtney, Trent, and Gwen.

"What he means is that the two tunnels are _very_ different from each other," Cameron explained. "The one on the left has minecart tracks and looks to be just another shaft, but the one on the right almost looks like it has _tooth_ marks on it. But I don't know what could have carved it out!"

"Considering the toxic _wasteland_ we're in," Noah said, "I'd say just about anything."

"So...we're going left, then?" Courtney asked.

"Oh yeah," Noah replied, "unless we _want_ to meet whatever dug that tunnel."

"Left it is!" Gwen said frantically, rushing forward to the mineshaft dragging Trent along with her.

/

"Wow, I never thought a jar full of bugs would be so _bright_ ," Zoey commented as she led the way for her team, holding up the firefly jar and looking at it more closely.

"Actually, fireflies are more efficient at producing light than _lightbulbs_ ," Harold said. "It's because the chemical reaction they use to make it doesn't give off any _heat_." The camera zoomed out as he spoke, showing a pair of glowing eyes looking out at the three from a crack in the wall.

"Huh," Zoey said blankly, looking at the jar again. "I guess that explains why this jar isn't _warmer_." As the trio moved on, the glowing-eyed figure emerged from the wall, and a familiar silhouette darted off in the direction the Maggots had came from with the distinct pattering of feet.

"Umm, not to interrupt the firefly talk or anything," Jasmine spoke up, eyes darting around nervously, "but did anyone else hear that?"

Zoey and Harold stopped in their tracks to look around, and a dramatic riff played in the background.

/

A flash took the focus to a pair of minecarts linked together on a downward slope as the beam of a flashlight approached.

"Yes! These will _totally_ speed things up!" Courtney said excitedly as she and Cameron led the rest of the Rats to the carts.

"I don't know," Noah said warily, "these seem a little too 'death trap' for my tastes."

"This whole _place_ is a death trap," Courtney countered, earning a nervous gulp from Gwen. "What we need now is _speed_ , so we can cover as much ground as possible, find our statue, and get _out_ of here."

Just then Courtney's badge turned from green to orange, earning a gasp from her and the others. "Oh no, your badge just changed colors!" Gwen cried out. "We're gonna freakin' _die_ down here!"

"No we won't," Trent said, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her close as her breathing became quick and shallow. "We still have fifteen minutes. We're gonna get through this!"

"Which means we _need_ to ride those carts!" Courtney said.

The shot focused in on Cameron as his badge suddenly turned orange as well. "Yikes!" he said before running over and diving headfirst into the front cart. "Shotgun! Called it!"

"Me and Gwen will take the back," Trent said, taking Gwen by the hand and running forward with her.

"I...guess I'm in front with you guys," Noah said hesitantly.

"Then come on!" Courtney said, grabbing his arms and pulling him to the carts. The shot cut to a close-up of the front wheel as Courtney reached down and pulled away a rock that was holding them in place, and the camera pulled back out to show all five Rats in their chosen cart.

"My first time riding the rails!" Cameron said excitedly as Courtney pulled a lever and the carts started moving downhill. He and Courtney cheered as they rolled off-screen, but the bubble-boy quickly added "I don't like it!" with a hint of terror in his voice.

/

"So...what should we do if there really _is_ something else down here with us?" Zoey asked as the scene moved back to the Maggots. "Do you think we could just hide from it?"

"Unlikely," Harold answered. "Anything that lives down here probably relies on something other than sight as its primary way of sensing things. If it has echolocation like bats, it could probably find us from just about anywhere."

"Oh...," Zoey said with a frown. "Then...I guess we just try and outrun it then?"

"That probably won't work either," Jasmine spoke up, looking around with wide, nervous eyes. "Whatever's down here will know the terrain much better than us, so we'd just end up getting cornered. If it _does_ come for us, we're gonna have to try and fight it off."

"Well in that case, I'm glad you're here with us, Jasmine," Zoey said, looking back and smiling at her teammate. "I'd hate to think what would happen if you weren't."

The three were silent for a moment before Harold said "Well, I'd probably be able to fight it off. I'm well-trained in ka-ra-te," he said with a cocky nod and quick chopping pose.

"Good to know," Jasmine said with a slightly relieved smile, and the three continued on with a decent amount of comfort for a few seconds more...before the badge on Zoey's arm beeped and turned orange.

All three of them gasped. "Oh no! I only have fifteen minutes left!" Zoey said.

Another beep drew their attention to Harold's badge as it changed as well. "Me too!" he cried out in panic.

A third beep, and Jasmine's breath became quick and shallow. "Oh no," she said, "not like this, not _here_! I...I gotta get out of here!" Her eyes rapidly darted around, and she turned and fled back the way they'd come from.

"Jasmine, _wait_!" Zoey called out, reaching a nervous arm out just a little too late.

The music became tense as the shot cut to Jasmine as she raced back down the tunnel into ever-increasing darkness. The camera zoomed in as she clenched her eyes shut and sped up...and ran straight into something large, pink, and hairless.

"Wha?" she said, stumbling back and opening her eyes and looking forward, the music rising ominously as the perspective moved behind her revealing the gigantic naked gopher she'd slammed into that was now lying on its back.

The mutant quickly got back to its feet, stood up on its haunches, and squealed menacingly at the girl. Jasmine quivered for a moment, then yelled "No!" in panic, blindly uppercutted the beast away from her, then turned around and ran back towards her teammates.

/

"Okay guys," Courtney told her teammates, the music becoming tense and trilling as the scene cut back to them rolling down the slope and the camera zooming in on the young woman in the front cart, "just keep your eyes open for that statue. It has to be around here _somewhere_."

"Umm, Courtney? I think we might have a more pressing issue," Cameron said from just off-screen, the shot cutting outward to show that the two carts were now on different tracks, with him and Courtney and Noah in the foreground and Gwent and Trent in the back.

"Seriously?! How did that even _happen_?!" Courtney exclaimed in disbelief. Gwen and Trent just shrugged with helpless nervousness.

The two carts exited from the tunnel into a much more open cave, with the former front carts's track curving downward while the other track sloped upward. Courtney, Cameron, and Noah all screamed as their cart dipped off-screen and promptly crashed, kicking up a bit of dust and causing the camera to shake.

The shot cut to Gwen and Trent as horror dawned on their faces as they looked ahead. "Oh man, the track's broken!" the musician cried out, the perspective moving to the front of the cart to reveal the mangled piece of track they were approaching.

"We're gonna frickin' _die_!" the goth screamed, the camera moving back to a distant side-view as the second cart launched off the track, and fell straight down with its passengers screaming all the way. They quickly passed the rocky ledge where Courtney, Cameron, and Noah lay seemingly unconscious, and landed with a splash far below.

A few ominous drum beats played as the scene receded into a set of monitors, the leftmost one showing only static while the middle showed the three Maggots running in terror and the rightmost one showed an underground lake.

"Looks like our players are _doomed_ ," Chris said, the camera zooming out to reveal him and Chef standing in a control room of sorts. "Will any of them survive? I have my doubts," the host laughed. "But find out for sure when we return with more, Total! Drama! Revenge of the Island!"

(Fade to Commercial and Back)

The episode resumed on a shot of the dark and dank and craggy underground cave, water drips echoing in the background as the camera panned to the left. It stopped on a small and sudden burst of bubbles, then cut in closer as Gwen broke the surface with a spluttering cough. Trent joined her a moment later, and the two quickly locked eyes before looking around in panic and confusion.

"Where _are_ we?" the goth asked. "And what happened to the others?"

"No idea," the musician replied, "I didn't see where their cart went. I guess Noah was _right_ about them being a mistake." As he spoke, a glowing-eyed figure stood up from behind a rock formation in the background, its long ears twitching with interest before it ducked back down out of sight.

"I guess so," Gwen said. "And now we're _lost_ in some radioactive underground cavern with _no_ idea where our teammates are, much less where that _statue_ we're supposed to find is. Could things get any _worse_?"

"Well...at least we still have each other," Trent said, and the two smiled.

And then an almost wolf-like howl rang out across the lake, startling the two lovebirds. "Aaaand...whatever _that_ is," Trent added nervously.

"Okay, time to get to shore!" Gwen added, and the two frantically swam off in the opposite direction.

/

The howl was still echoing through the cavern as the scene flashed to the wrecked mine cart still on dry land, which had crashed against a thick and massive stalagmite. A low yet tense tune and a human groan rose up as the howl faded away, and the camera panned to the left onto the fallen bodies of Courtney, Noah, and Cameron. The bubble-boy got to his feet with an active flashlight still in his hands, rubbed his head with a pained " _Owww_...," and looked around.

He immediately spotted his teammates nearby and gasped. "Courtney! Noah!" he exclaimed, running over to them. "Guys, wake up!" he added, tapping Courtney on the side of the head with the flashlight and groaning when he didn't get a response. "I've read about situations like this but it's sooo different in real life," he said as he ran around the girl to Noah and tapped him in the head as well, still to no effect.

"Think, what would Courtney do...," he asked himself, tapping his chin then looking down at Noah again. With a swift cry of "Wake up already!" he whacked the other boy on the head, who immediately groaned in pain and got to his feet.

"...Cameron...?" he asked blearily, opening his eyes and seeing the bubble-boy.

"You're okay!" Cameron replied eagerly.

"Yeah, no thanks to _you_ ," Noah muttered as the camera zoomed in slightly, rubbing where he'd been smacked while Cameron turned around and whacked Courtney.

"OWWW! Who _hit_ me?!" she demanded, bolting to her feet with a flashlight in her hands as well.

"Sorry," Cameron told her, "it was the only way I could think of to wake you up. Now come on," he said, his teammates' eyes widening as he unknowingly rose about a foot into the air, "we have to find the others!" It was then that he noticed his sudden height change, and along with Courtney and Noah he looked at his feet.

The camera zoomed out a step, revealing that Cameron was now standing on the head of a giant hairless gopher that had just popped out of the ground. The three teens screamed, and ran away in fear as the gopher rose up even more and roared at them.

/

"Is that gopher still chasing us?" Jasmine asked as the scene cut to her, Zoey, and Harold running through another mine shaft.

The camera focused in on Harold as he looked back over his shoulder, then zoomed out as he saw the naked gopher that was running behind him. "Yes!" he looked back at his teammates and screamed.

"No choice, then," Jasmine said, skidding to a stop and letting her teammates to pass her. She reeled around and punched the hairless mutant square in the face again, knocking it onto its back a couple feet away. The perspective moved behind the giant young woman along with Zoey and Harold as they all looked down the tunnel at their pursuer. They watched with baited breath as it quickly got back on its feet, and the shot briefly cut to Jasmine's close-up as she frowned. "You're a tough little thing aren'tcha? But I wouldn't come any closer if I were you."

The camera moved back behind her, then zoomed in on the gopher as it rubbed its nose in irritation. Then it suddenly sniffed the air, squealed, and hurriedly dug straight down into the earth.

"Is it gone?" Zoey asked warily as the perspective resumed its usual side-view.

"Maybe," Harold answered. "But with _that_ kind of burrowing ability, it could pop back up at any moment."

"Good to know," Jasmine said with a frantic smile. "Let's just...keep going." Her teammates nodded, and they turned as one and resumed running down the tunnel. The camera lingered, however, and the previously-energetic background music became low and ominous as the shot panned back to the gopher hole, and the same familiar silhouette that had been watching them earlier tiptoed into view from the right, jumping over the gopher hole and landing softly after a mid-air flip.

/

The background music became tensely energetic once more as the scene flashed back to Courtney, Noah, and Cameron running in terror down a different tunnel.

"Did...did we _lose_ it?" Courtney panted.

"We came down here, didn't we?" Noah replied.

"I meant the _gopher_!" the young woman scolded.

"I think so!" Cameron said, looking back over his shoulder from the rear of the group. The three promptly skidded to a halt, and looked around – the camera pulled back slightly to reveal that they'd come to yet another crossroads.

"Okay...where to next?" Courtney asked, and the three Maggots fanned out – her and Noah going further into the room, while Cameron stuck close to the wall.

"I guess we just look for more...tracks, or something?" Noah guessed vaguely, sticking close to the CIT and her light.

"Probably," Cameron said as the shot cut over to him. The shot zoomed out as he turned his back on the camera, revealing that the long-eared silhouette that had been watching Gwen and Trent in the underground lake was now lurking just inside the tunnel the trio had come in from. "Although we really have no idea where anything even _leads_ , so-" The shadowy figure suddenly darted into the room on all fours, grabbed the hood of Cameron's hoodie in its mouth, and dragged him away screaming into the next tunnel along the wall.

" _Cameron_!" his two teammates cried, turning around in horror and running off towards the tunnel they'd just seen him disappear into, his flashlight lying on the ground.

The scene cut to follow the bubble-boy in close-up as he was dragged along, yelping or grunting in pain every few seconds. "Hey! Let me go!" he yelled as he flailed helplessly. "Where are you _taking_ me?" Between his struggling and the occasional bump he eventually managed to rotate from his side to his back, got his first good look at his assailant, and gasped. "Wait! I recognize you! You're-"

He was cut off again when another bump caused his shirt to get pulled up over his face, muffling his next words.

/

The music leveled off abruptly as the scene cut to yet another tunnel, this one being trudged through by the still-dripping forms of Gwen and Trent.

"Trent?" the goth called out, looking around nervously.

"Yeah?" the musician replied, stopping in his tracks and inadvertently causing Gwen to bump in to him.

"Sorry, it's nothing, I just...wanted to make sure you were still there," Gwen said sheepishly. "It's so _dark_ in here I can't tell what's real and what's just my mind playing tricks on me..."

"Yeah, I know how you feel," Trent told her. "Even though I'm not claustrophobic like you are, everything that's happened is _really_ stressing me out." He pulled his luck rabbit's foot from his pocket, and started tapping it to his head. "One-two-three-four-five-six-seven-eight- _nine_."

"Does that...really make you feel better?" Gwen asked.

"Yeah, it does," Trent answered with an unseen smile. "I know it's weird, but it gives me something to focus on when times get tough as a way of maybe making things turn out okay."

"Wow," Gwen said, "I never thought of a lucky number that way. Where'd yours even come from."

"Oh, well...," the musician began slowly as a light and emotional melody began to play, "I had this toy train my grandad gave me as a kid. Right before he died one of the wheels fell off, so there were only nine. I was _devastated_. So my mom told me nine was now my lucky number."

"I had no _idea_ ," the goth said softly. "It really means a lot to you, huh?"

"Yeah," Trent replied just as softly, stopping in his tracks and turning around. "And don't worry. No matter what happens, I _promise_ I'll be right there to share my luck with you." He reached out and took her hands in his, and in the darkness they shared a faint smile and fainter blush.

/

A flash took the scene back to the Maggots, the music turning tense and plodding as they crept along the tunnel warily. Every few steps Jasmine made a hand signal and they froze, she looked around slightly, and then at another signal they silently started moving again.

As they repeated this process the camera zoomed out, revealing the familiar silhouette creeping along behind them, moving as they moved and stopping as they stopped. When Jasmine suddenly turned around the figure darted into a crevice in the wall, and crept back out when the Maggots turned back and moved on again.

A few feet later Jasmine suddenly looked back again and the figure darted behind a large rock jutting out of the wall just in time. The survivalist and her friends slowly turned back around, and the figure crept back out into the open with a mischievous grin...only for Jasmine to immediately look back again before the figure could react.

"Gotcha!" the survivalist shouted, quickly tackling the mysterious figure to the ground. Harold and Zoey quickly ran over to them, and Zoey held up the firefly jar to illuminate the area and reveal...

" _Izzy_?!" Jasmine said in shock upon seeing the true face of the person she'd pinned.

"Jasmine!" the wild child replied with an almost mocking enthusiasm, though she quickly scrunched her face up in thought. "It _is_ Jasmine, right? Hahaha, I _totally_ never really learned all your names when we were on opposite teams."

"Err, yeah, it's Jasmine," the taller girl answered warily, getting off of Izzy. "What are you _doing_ down here?" she asked as they both stood up. "You've been making this place even _more_ terrifying than it already is for me."

"Oh, haha, well," Izzy laughed, dusting herself off, "I was just, like, playing a game, y'know? I bet my roommate that I could get more of you guys back to our place while being _sneaky_ about it."

"Wait, really?" Zoey asked with a dumbfounded look. "Why?"

"For fun," Izzy shrugged. "But anyway, now that you guys know I'm here I guess it's time to do this the fast way."

"What's faster than just leading us yourself?" Harold asked.

"This," Izzy said simply before making what could only be described as a modified hog call. She grinned at the three confused Maggots, and at a sudden peak in the music three pair of mutant gopher hands shot up out of the ground under them, grabbed them by their ankles, and pulled them screaming in to the earth. Izzy giggled, sighed, and put her hands on her hips. "Okay, that's _them_ taken care of...what to do, what to do..."

As she muttered to herself, she raised an arm and scratched her head with two hands still on her hips.

/

A hollow sound played as panned across another cave, from an entrance tunnel on the right, past a large pile of toxic waste barrels, and on to Cameron lying on the ground with his shirt still covering his face, next to some steps carved into a higher level of stone.

He stood up, pulled his hoodie back down with a gasp, and looked around in confusion. "Where did you take me?" he asked the room. "And why did you _do_ this?" A movement to his left caught his attention, and he whipped around towards the steps.

"Yah, sorry about being a little rough back there," the long-eared figure said, stepping out from behind what looked like a cobbled-together set of bunk beds atop the plateau with what appeared to be a box of something in her hands. A few mutant gophers were on the platform with her, but they seemed to be milling around and grooming themselves peacefully. "I just wanted to get you back here as fast as possible. Hey, I didn't lose your teammates, did I?" Staci added with a glance around, stepping forward even more and revealing herself in full – the same wolfish features she'd gotten during season three, and with slightly more tattered clothing.

"I'm...sure they'll catch up," Cameron said with a hesitant wariness. "But more importantly, what do you want with us? And how are you even _surviving_ down here?"

Staci blinked, then held up the box. "Oh, well, we go out and scavenge food from the camp every now and then. Want some crackers? They're chicken flavored~!" she said, shaking the box in a somewhat enticing manner.

"...no thanks," Cameron replied. "What I meant was, how have you not _died_ from toxic waste exposure?"

The wolfish girl shrugged. "Like, my roommate asked the same thing. I'm pretty sure it's because I'm a werewolf, yah. Werewolves are pretty, like, durable, y'know."

"I highly doubt that, as there's no scientific proof that werewolves _exist_ ," Cameron said with unthinking bluntness.

Immediately, Staci and the nearby mutant gophers bristled irritably. "Like, what do you _mean_ there's no proof of werewolves? _I_ exist, don't I? Unless you think I'm something _else_!"

"Sorry," the bubble-boy cringed before becoming suddenly thoughtful. "Although...where was it that you, umm, 'transformed' again?"

"Northern Ukraine, but I don't see why that matters," Staci replied in confusion and annoyance.

Cameron's eyes went wide. "Eureka! That explains _everything_!"

"...really?" Staci asked skeptically.

Before Cameron could explain, however, a familiar cackling laughter caught the attention of himself, Staci, and the gophers, and he froze in fear. "Oh no," he groaned, the music taking a sudden and dramatic turn. "Staci, what was that you said about a roommate?"

"Oh, yah, you probably know her don't you?" Staci said idly as the laughter drew closer. The shot focused in on Cameron as he nervously turned around, then zoomed out just enough to show him looking towards the tunnel at the far end of the room.

The music peaked, and the laughter suddenly stopped as something dropped behind Cameron, causing him to jump a little in fright. His breath became shallow as he slowly turned back around, and the camera zoomed out to show Izzy standing there with a broad grin on her face, with nothing particularly out-of-the-ordinary about her.

"Hi, Cam!" she said with a happy wave.

/

A tense challenge tune began playing as the scene cut to a drop of water landing in a small puddle, soon followed by two sets of feet that ran through and around it. The camera zoomed out to show them belonging to Courtney and Noah, the two Rats panting as they ran down the tunnel. A shrill but familiar cry of terror echoed down the tunnel, and the two looked at each other - "Cameron," they said at the same time.

Seconds later, Courtney's arm badge beeped and turned red, earning a surprised look from both teens. "Five minutes left," Courtney said with renewed determination, "let's make 'em _count_." Noah's badge changed soon after, but they ignored it – but a second scream, much louder and of a different tone than Cameron's, could not be.

"Gwen!" Courtney said in concern.

"Well isn't that convenient, they're in the same direction as our missing Bubble Buddy," Noah remarked. "Hey _Turtle Doves_!" he shouted. "We're over here!"

The camera quick-panned right over to Gwen and Trent, the goth clinging to the musician with both their badges red. "Noah? Courtney?" Gwen called out with fearful hesitance.

"Oh man, are we glad to see you guys," Trent said as the two other Rats ran up. "Was that _Cameron_ we heard just now?"

"Yeah, he got captured by some cave monster or something," Noah answered.

"We gotta find him and the statue quick," Courtney said. "Let's just take off these stupid packs, they're only slowing us down," she added, moving to take the straps off her shoulders.

The sudden crackle and whine of a loudspeaker turning on gave her pause, however. "Those packs of pain stay on until I tell you _otherwise_!" Chris told them. "Or your whole team is disqualified! Dis-qual-i- _fied_!"

"CHRIS!" Gwen screamed the moment the message ended. "YOU'D BETTER GET US OUT OF HERE!"

"Uhh, I'm more of a _watcher_ , not a _saver_ ," Chris replied. "So, uh, _no_." The loudspeaker shut off again, and the four Rats shared a nervous look.

"We're on our own, then," Trent said.

"I think Cameron's cry came from over there," Courtney said, pointing back the way she and Noah had come from. "Let's get going." She took off first, and her teammates quickly followed after.

/

The scene flashed back to the entrance to the cave that Staci, Cameron, and Izzy were in as the four remaining Rats ran in as well.

"Oh no! Cameron!" Gwen immediately gasped.

"What did you _do_ to him?" Courtney added, the camera panning left to show the bubble-boy lying unconscious on his backpack next to Izzy, a few mutant gophers standing nearby immediately turning their attention towards the newcomers.

The wild child shrugged. "No idea, I just said hello and he passed out. But more importantly," she grinned, "now we're all here!"

"Uhh, and what do you mean by _everybody_?" Trent asked warily.

"I _think_ she means _us_ ," the voice of Zoey explained, causing the camera to quick-pan over to her. Though her team's jar of fireflies was still in her hands, the shot zoomed out to reveal that she was dangling with her heavy pack in the jaws of a mutant gopher standing on its haunches on a pile of barrels; another outward zoom revealed Jasmine and Harold in a similar state next to her with the survivalist looking particularly terrified.

"Tunnel...dark...so _small_...," she whimpered and shivered, her eyes wide with shock.

"Fear not, my sweet," Harold told her in a fairly reassuring tone, "we're in a nice, _open_ cavern right now." Jasmine just whimpered again.

"Right, aaanyway," Izzy said, "how about me and Staci give you guys a tour of our crib?"

"Uhh, unless the tour includes a couple of golden statues and ends before we die of chemical exposure in a couple minutes," Noah spoke up, "I'd rather _not_."

"And I think I speak for the rest of my team when I say that we'd like to be put down now," Harold added rather calmly.

Staci sighed, then walked over to Izzy. "See, I _told_ you they wouldn't wanna stay once we brought them here."

"Aww, that's too bad," the wild child said sadly, patting her apparent friend on the back then snapping her fingers. The gophers holding the Maggots squealed lightly then dropped them, the three campers landing in little more than a heap. Harold and Zoey quickly helped a still-stunned Jasmine back to her feet, their fireflies forgotten on the ground, and the shot cut back over to Izzy as Staci left for the makeshift bunk beds and the other Rats rushed over to Cameron.

"Cameron? Please, _please_ tell me you're okay," Courtney said with great concern as she knelt down and propped her fallen teammate up on her lap.

"Guys," Gwen moaned pitifully, swaying unsteadily and putting a hand to her forehead, "I'm _really_ starting to not feel good right now." She nearly fell over, but Trent and Noah managed to grab her just in time.

"Urrgh, me too," Jasmine groaned, finally shaking away her shock but drooping a little – startling Zoey and Harold, who were still propping her up.

"Hey," Staci called from off-screen, earning the Maggots' attention and causing the camera to cut outward, showing the full cavern with all the teens and gophers. "Yah, these are what you wanted, right?" The wolfish speaker was standing at the edge of the stairway up to the elevated bunkbeds, and was holding the two Golden Chris statuettes that the teams had been tasked with retrieving. The camera zoomed in on them, an angelic tune playing as a radiant golden background appeared behind them.

Those campers who were still conscious gasped. "Noah, watch Cameron," Courtney commanded, lifting the unconscious bubble-boy and shoving him into the slacker's startled arms. Without another word the dominant young woman charged forward, and the shot cut to the Maggots as Zoey gasped and did the same – causing Harold to nearly collapse under Jasmine's weight.

The two girls reached the edge of the steps at around the same time, and immediately started trying to push past one another to get to their team's statue first.

"Get out of the _way_!" Courtney demanded through clenched teeth as she pulled Zoey's braid and shoved against her shoulder.

"No!" Zoey retorted, though with less resolve even as she struggled to both pry Courtney's hands away and squeeze onto the steps.

"Aww, jeez, we don't have _time_ for this," Trent said with wide-eyed uncertainty as he continued to hold on to a weary and woozy Gwen.

"Ehh, just give 'em a second, they'll sort it out," Izzy said dismissively before leaning in towards Cameron, still unmoving in Noah's arms. "I just don't get what's wrong with him," she said, her brow furrowed in thought.

"I'm not surprised," Noah replied with a stinging sort of anxiousness.

It was then that Cameron finally murmured and stirred and awoke with a jolt. For a silent beat he and Izzy stared at each other, then the bubble-boy screamed "NO! GET AWAY FROM ME!" He squirmed blindly against the hold of his pack with enough violence to startle Izzy back a step and cause Noah to drop the pack. Cameron promptly took the opportunity to slip out of its straps and dart away, leaving Noah looking shocked and Izzy looking hurt.

Moments later, a crackling through the air indicated the start of a message over the loudspeaker – and a low but tense tune indicated the start of something else. "If you can hear this," Chris called out as Cameron was shown hiding behind Gwen and Trent, "congrats! You're not dead yet!" Courtney and Zoey paused in their still-fruitless struggle to look up and around along with Staci, while Harold paused in carrying Jasmine forward a step at a time. "Wherever you are, immediately discard your bombs-," panic immediately covered faces of the dweeb and the survivalist, "I mean, _backpacks_ , and _run_!"

Noah gasped and looked down at the discard pack he was holding. The shot cut back to Courtney and Zoey, who had stopped their fruitless effort to grab the statues in order to take off their own packs..

" _Bombs_?!" Courtney exclaimed, lifting the largest flap to see what looked like several sticks of dynamite and a detonator. "You went _too far_ this time, Chris!"

"Y'know, I don't think it's really the right _time_ for explosives," Izzy mused.

" _Nobody does_ ," Noah told her sharply. "We gotta get out of here!"

"There's some mine carts over there we can use," Staci suggested, the camera cutting back to her and the statues she was still holding, then over to the left where a trio of mine carts sat on a rail. "Yah, it leads right out of the mine."

" _Good_ ," Courtney said forcefully, finally just leaping right onto the rocky platform and grabbing the green-based statuette from Staci. "Guys, I got the statue! Let's get out of here!" She ran off to the left, and the shot cut to Noah following in the same direction.

Zoey gasped as the focus moved back to her and Staci, and the two girls locked eyes. "Sorry," the indie girl said as she grabbed the red-based statue, "I hope you didn't need this."

"Like I care," Staci told her with panic rising in her voice, "I'm getting out of here. C'mon, Izzy, let's go!" she shouted before running off towards the carts.

"Huh? Oh, yeah, right," Izzy said absentmindedly before running off as well.

The shot cut to the carts just as Zoey reached them and Courtney started pulling Noah into the front car with her. Zoey paused as she started to climb into the second, and looked around in concern. "Wait, where's...?" she murmured, and the camera quick-panned back to the main part of the room to show Trent and Harold packless but struggling with their respective teammates while a few growling mutant gophers closed in on them.

"Oh no!" Zoey gasped, quickly dropping from the side of the cart and running back towards the others.

"Crap," Courtney muttered, hauling Noah into the front cart while Staci and Izzy jumped into the second cart. 'Here, hold this," the Rats' leader said, thrusting their team's statue in Noah hand, then hopping out of the cart and running back into the main part of the room herself.

The shot cut back to the stragglers as they slowly but frantically tried to move away from a pair of increasingly aggressive gophers. A third circled in front of them with a fierce squeal, and Harold and Trent screamed. They closed their eyes and braced themselves as the music peaked, but with a noticeable thud the gopher in front of them toppled over, revealing Zoey behind it with her team's statue raised to use the base as a bludgeon.

Harold and Trent breathed a sigh of relief that only lasted until the two gophers behind them squealed menacingly and reared up on their hind legs. Zoey quickly darted forward and resumed her position under Jasmine's left arm, allowing her and Harold to quickly carry their groaning teammate away. Trent, however, could only gasp and try to hurry up with Cameron on his back and Gwen at his side, both barely conscious. His relief came moments later, however, as Courtney ran past him, launched a flying kick into the belly of one of the gophers that sent it flying back into the other one, then quickly turned around.

"C'mon, they won't be down for long," she said, picking Gwen up piggyback style and running off with Trent hot on her heels still carrying Cameron.

The footage flashed ahead to them arriving as the Maggots got settled into the rearmost mine cart. Noah helped Trent and Cameron up into the front, then the former two pulled up Gwen. As the music became more and more hectic Courtney pushed the carts from the side until they started moving forward, then hopped up into the middle cart with Izzy and Staci.

Most of those still conscious screamed as the carts rolled down a slope into a tunnel, then down even more into a slightly more open cave. The rails bent upward, and the carts followed them out of sight...

/

The music stopped abruptly as the shot cut outside to Chris and Chef waiting at what appeared to be a dilapidated mine entrance – a wooden platform and scaffolding that had been outside the elevated shaft had crumbled, and the cart track's end was twisted and bent. Both men were wearing hazmat suits, and interestingly Chef was also holding the massive tongs he normally reserved for elimination ceremonies.

"They're really cuttin' it close," the host said.

"Mmm-hmm," Chef replied.

Seconds later the camera panned up to focus on the entrance, and a drumroll led into the resumption of the intense musical score as the trio of mine carts and their screaming passengers flew out into the air, and crashed just past the two adults.

When the resulting cloud of dust began to settle the camera was focused on Staci and Izzy, the two girls coughing and hacking. The sudden clamping of the tongs around them caused them to stop, and the camera zoomed out to show Chef lifting them out of the rubble as Chris watched. "I'll deal with you two trespassers _later_ ," he said irritably before turning his focus towards the campers, just now groaning and getting to their feet. He walked forward, and picked the green-based statue up off the ground.

"We...we won, right?" Courtney asked, holding her head in pain. "Our statue was in the _front_ so it got out of the mine first, right?"

"Technically, yes," the host answered, " _buu~uutt_ , after reviewing the footage, it seems _somebody_ removed their pack before I said so. And if you'll recall, I said that doing so would cause their _entire team_ to be disqualified." The other rats looked at Cameron, who held his head and groaned. "Therefore," he turned on his heel as the background music turned triumphant, "the Maggots _win_!"

Harold, Zoey, and Jasmine cheered weakly.

"All clear?" Chris turned and asked Chef, the hulking man still holding on to Staci and Izzy. Chef nodded, and the host took out a remote control. "EXECUTING OPERATION DOOMSDAY!" Chris shouted, pressing the button on the remote.

An explosion billowed out of the mine entrance, and when the smoke and dust cleared it had been entirely blocked by rocks. Chris and Chef shared a happy nod.

"Wait a minute, this wasn't about the statues at all!" Harold said accusingly, walking over to the two men.

"Sure it was!" Chris told him. "And as an added bonus," he motioned back to the blocked mine entrance, "you just helped me seal off the toxic waste forever! And get the feds off my back. It's win-win," he gave the camera a thumbs-up as Chef walked by behind him, "for _me_."

"Figures," Gwen muttered bitterly, the shot zooming out to show the entire cast back on their feet.

Chris just shrugged and put his hands behind his back. "Rats, hope you're hungry for marshmallows. But first," Chef walked back up behind him, having traded in his captives for a fire hose, "before there's permanent genetic damage..." He walked away, and with a chuckle Chef turned on the hose and doused the campers with a spray of water powerful enough to push them off-screen in a matter of seconds.

/

The footage skipped ahead to dusk, as Trent walked calmly into the boys' side of the Rats' cabin. The camera followed him inside, showing Noah reading a book on his bed. "Hey, man," the musician greeted.

"Hey," the slacker replied. He took a breath, then put his book down and swung himself to the side of the bunk. "How's Gwen doing?"

"Good, now that she's had some fresh air," Trent replied, smiling as he walked over and picked up his guitar.

"Cool, cool," Noah said in a failed attempt at being casual. "Look, uh, this is kinda weird," he rubbed the back of his neck and looked away, "but...we're _good_ , right?"

Trent looked at him and blinked. "Well, yeah, man, why wouldn't we be?"

Noah sighed and flopped backwards onto his head. "I don't know. It's just that with you and Gruesome being so close, and her being pretty good with Bubble Buddy and Big Boss, I can't help feeling that I'm about to be the odd man voted _out_ of this show."

Trent smiled and shook his head. "Yeah, I know how that feels. But don't worry," he said, "I can promise you that there's no reason _any_ of us would want you gone right now."

"Really?" Noah said, raising his head and his eyebrow. "That's...actually reassuring. Thanks."

"No problem," the musician told him as he slid down onto the floor.

"Well with that taken care of, I, uh, think I'm gonna go for a _walk_ ," Noah said, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly.

/

The scene flashed outside, Noah closing the cabin door behind him then turning around to see Courtney heading out of the girls' side at the same time.

"Oh! Hey! Just, uh, just who I wanted to see," Courtney greeted awkwardly.

"Likewise," Noah said with a dry smirk, and Courtney raised an inquisitive brow at him as they walked down the steps. "Look, I've been thinking about what you said this morning about Gwen and Trent."

He paused there, and Courtney quickly smiled and filled the silence. "Good, I'm glad you're _finally_ thinking about strategy," she whispered. "We need to figure out how to deal with them, but I _don't_ wanna just vote one of them out." Noah raised an eyebrow at her, and she looked away. "Look, I have my reasons, okay? But anyway, I'm afraid that means we're gonna have to...vote for _Cameron_ tonight. And before you say anything," she said quickly, "I don't feel good about it. He's been a great friend out here, and I think me might have a crush on me too."

"Uhh, I'm pretty sure that's just something me and Harold made up to tease the guy," Noah admitted awkwardly.

"Oh," Courtney said blankly. "Well I guess that makes things a _little_ better. But still, he's close enough to Gwen that he might form an alliance with her and Trent if we don't act now, and he _did_ cause us to lose the challenge today."

"And unless Chris actually gets rid of Izzy for _good_ there's always a chance she'll pop up in the middle of something important and scare the guy half to death again," Noah added.

"Exactly," Courtney said. "That's why I think we should vote him off now and, y'know, spare him from that happening. So, you in?"

Noah smirked. "Hey, as long as it's not _me_ getting hurled," he told her.

/

The usual handful of drumbeats opened the low elimination tune as the footage cut ahead to the ceremonial campfire.

"The votes, are in," Chris opened, the camera cutting outward to show him at his podium, Chef with the toxic marshmallow in a smaller pair of tongs, and the five members of the Toxic Rats sitting nervously in a row. "Who will received the marshmallow of loserdom and leave the game forever?" the host asked idly, the camera zooming in on the radioactive treat in question before panning back to Chris. "The following players, are _safe_." He picked up the first of four normal marshmallows, and the music reached its tensest part. "Gwen. Trent. _Courtney_ ," he said, tossing bits of white to each person called. Though those three smiled and accepted their prizes with silent grace, the two remaining boys shared an anxious look.

"Aaaand... _Noah_ ," Chris finished, the large-headed sneak letting out his breath just enough to allow the marshmallow to enter his mouth and become lodged in his throat. "Cameron, I'm afraid it's back to the bubble with you."

"Me?" Cameron asked in shock, getting on his feet but quickly ducking as the toxic marshmallow was tossed overhead, landing with a sizzle off-camera. "But why? I...I thought I earned my place among you! I thought we were _friends_!"

"You did, and you _are_ , Cameron," Gwen said anxiously, standing and placing a hand on the boy's shoulder. "But we just...," she looked vaguely at Trent and Noah and even a slightly surprised Courtney, "thought this might be what's _best_ for you right now."

"I vehemently disagree," Cameron told her. "But I don't think I have a choice anymore." He hung his head and sighed.

/

The music became sombre as the scene flashed to the Dock of Shame, where Cameron was already seated in the bucket of the season's catapult. Chris laughed, and asked "Any last words, kid?"

Before Cameron could reply, however, the squeak of wheels caught the host's attention. "Hold that thought," he told the bubble-boy, and the camera cut to a close-up of the wheels of a large hand truck. The shot zoomed out as a dramatic riff played, revealing Izzy and Staci inside a cage being wheeled down the dock by Chef Hatchet.

"Right, it's time for the two of you to get your _butts_ of my island," Chris told the two captives.

"Aww," Staci said, her ears drooping sadly.

"Hey," Izzy growled angrily, "you can _not_ do this to me, okay?"

"Oh _really_?" Chris said with a look of amusement.

"Oh yeah," Izzy nodded with an intense look in her eyes. "I was never _actually_ eliminated before I left, so technically I'm still in the game. And according to my contract, if I get hurled with _out_ being formally voted off, I can sue you guys for, like, _millions_."

Chris' brow shot up warily. "Is she telling the truth about that?" he hissed at Chef, who shrugged helplessly. Chris sighed and scowled and palmed his face. "Fine," he said, "whatever, you can stay. For _now_. But Staci's still going, got that?"

"It's probably for the best," Staci lamented as Chef opened the door of the cage and grabbed her by the arm. "I didn't really like living in the mine anyway."

The footage flashed ahead a little, Staci now sitting next to Cameron in the Hurl of Shame. The sombre farewell music resumed as the two of them sighed, and the camera zoomed out to show Chris and Chef and Izzy at the end of the dock with them, then the rest of the cast watching from dry ground.

"You know," Staci told Cameron, "you never did explain what me transforming in Ukraine had to do with anything."

"Oh yeah," the bubble-boy said blankly. "I think you might have entered the Chernobyl Exclusion Zone by mistake." At the wolfish girl's blank look, he cleared his throat and continued. "It was the site of a biiiig nuclear meltdown a few decades ago, and there's still a _lot_ of radiation around. I think you're a mutant, not a werewolf."

Staci stared at him blankly and seemed to sag a little in sheer disbelief. "I'm not a werewolf?" she said with a hint of sadness in her voice.

"Most likely," Cameron answered. "It's the only explanation for why you didn't change any further despite spending so much time in the mine. Although," he rubbed his chin and furrowed his brow, "that still doesn't explain why Izzy-"

Before he could finish the wild child darted forward and pulled the lever of the catapult, grinning and waving as the two were hurled screaming into the night. "You know, that actually seems like a lot of fun!" she said excitedly, her hand 'shading' her brow as she watched them disappear into the darkness.

"Good, because I'm sure it won't be long before you get to try it yourself," Chris told her with a rather forced smile as the camera zoomed out and the series' capstone theme began to play. "Especially because from now on, you'll be joining the Mutant Maggots." He motioned up the dock, and the camera cut to Zoey, Jasmine, and Harold sharing a wary and uncertain look.

" _Cool_ ," Izzy said excitedly as the shot moved back to her and Chris.

"Join us next time," the host said as he turned to the camera and spread his arms, "for more danger, treachery," Izzy bent down behind him and waved at the camera...with two left arms, "and _incredibly_ annoying weirdos," Chris said with a quick glare at the redhead, who stood straight up and whistled nonchalantly, nothing visibly abnormal about her body any longer.

Chris huffed, then turned his usual smile back towards the camera. "On Total! Drama! _Rrrrevenge_ , of the _Island_!"

(Fade to Credits)

* * *

 **Author's Note - Post Script**

Cameron, out of everyone on the cast this season, is the person who I feel I've had the most difficulty with, and as a result I'm most disappointed by. I never intended on having him go nearly as far as he did in canon, but even so he didn't really turn out exactly like I wanted. I had originally intended on portraying him as basically Courtney's second-in-command, as well as the one keeping the peace between her and the other Rats, but I'm not sure how much of that really ended up coming through. Ultimately, he just wasn't ever that important to the plot - I had other events and relationships I wanted to focus on, so Cameron just ended up getting shunted to the side. To those of you who wanted more from him, I'm sorry.

Still, I did accomplish one thing I wanted from him - which was to meet Staci, and explain what she really was. I don't know how big of a surprise the reveal is, or how well it'll be accepted...but it is what it is. And I don't think this is the last we'll see of her, either.

Strategy-wise, well, nothing to comment on regarding the Maggots, but the Rats seemed to have shifted a bit. Gwen and Trent, even if they don't really realize it, are the center of power now, with Courtney and Noah stuck between either banding together against them for their own survival, or gaining Gwent's favor as the third wheel. Well...it's probably quite as dramatic to them, but still. Noah, again, didn't send any notes this week; I did consider it, but ultimately decided that he still wouldn't see the need as long as he could more directly ensure he wasn't going home.

Oh, and now Izzy's back! For...kind of a bullshit reason, I'll admit, but hey - she pretty much had to come back somehow, it's what she does. The Maggots are about to get...stranger, I think.

Let me know what you think, and I'll see you all next Friday.

\- Fangren

* * *

 **Appendix: TSROTI Eliminated Contestants**

Cody - (13th Place)

Izzy - (RETURNED | Formerly AWOL)

Leonard - (12th Place)

Justin - (11th Place)

Lindsay - (10th Place)

Cameron - (9th Place)


	8. Chapter 8 - Treasure Island of McLean

**Author's Note**

Alright folks, take a deep breath because we have reached the final pre-merge episode of Total Shuffled Revenge of the Island - and thus the end of the middle third of the show. Needless to say, if things haven't been exciting before now, they should rapidly be getting more so.

Since it came up in a couple reviews, I'll talk a little bit about **Staci and her presence on the island** last episode. To be blunt, it was my own oversight that I never bothered to explain (or really even come up with a reason) why she was there in the first place rather than just going back to her family, presumably like the rest of the cast did after their yacht left back in episode one. I had in part just assumed that she didn't really need to be explained, much like Ezekiel in canon, but that was clearly a mistake. So for the record, even though I don't know if I'll ever actually say so in-story, let's just say that Staci returned to the island because she wanted to give the whole 'being a werewolf who does werewolf things' thing another shot and figured it might be fun to mess with Chris and the new cast. But because terrorizing people really isn't in her personality, she just...never really did much besides hang out in the mines with the gophers and Izzy, and it just became too awkward for her to admit that coming out there was a mistake and that she should go back home. At least until she was captured and got a free catapult ride off the island, anyway.

So with that taken care of, it's on to the reviews!

 **SilverWriter0927:** Thank you so much, as always!

 **acosta perez jose ramiro:** Yup, that's what I was going for - Cameron proved a little too much of a liability last week, so he was eliminated. Although it wasn't Courtney who removed her backpack before the designated time, it was Cameron - Courtney put hers back on after Chris said not to take them off yet. But Cameron ended up taking his off in fear just a little too early, thus causing the Rats' disqualification. And yeah, I suppose Staci is a 'biological' werewolf rather than a supernatural one, in a manner of speaking.

 **bruno14:** Hmm, well, it does certainly seem like the post-merge alliances are already just about set, at least to some of the cast. But there is still time for those to change... And yeah, Cameron probably wouldn't have had a very good time if he'd been kept around. I'm glad you enjoyed the Gwent moments, and as for Noah...well, he has a fairly decent idea as to what he should be doing.

 **Tokusatsu-31st Century:** Yeah, getting away from your current biggest fear is usually a plus. And as for Gwent lasting longer than Courtney or Noah...well, it's an interesting prediction, at least.

 **Sarcasm is a Habit:** Ahaha, well, I was pretty deliberate with the bits of story she had back in World Tour, so I'm not surprised that some people picked up on what I was hinting at. And yeah, Izzy's return was as ridiculous here as it was in canon, so I guess it all works out somehow? It isn't out of the realm of possibility for the series, at least, which is good enough. Anyway, I hope you enjoy what happens next!

 **Call Me Ishmael:** Ah, well, I'm happy that at least some of my readers will miss Cameron. I will say that while he greatly admires Courtney in a platonic way, he never really considered her romantically (before he was teased about it, anyway). He didn't really have a crush on her, but I could see him developing one in a hypothetical future once he learns more about his own feelings. That aside, I'm glad you enjoyed the rest of the cast, and I hope you continue to do so from here on out.

 **Animation Adventures:** Thank you, I'm glad it was as good as canon in that regard. And you have a point regarding Cameron; though he didn't do as well as in canon in winning the million dollars (or at least getting runner-up), he did still grow as a person and proved that he could handle life outside his bubble. I'm quite happy you enjoyed Gwen and Trent so much, it really helps make my admittedly last-minute decision to include the number 9 story worth it. Regarding Izzy, I'm glad you're accepting of the reason by her return to the game - instead of being eliminated under a different name in canon, it was simply that her name was never formally called out as being the loser before she fled and the ceremony was forced to end. And as for her arms getting fixed...well, do you really think Izzy would want to fix something like that? And as for what you had hoped would be the case with Staci...well, I'll admit that it somehow seems even more farfetched than the mutant thing. Which in turn is odd to say because the mutant thing was already weird enough even by the show's standards.

 **Gage the Hedgehog:** Thanks, as always.

 **Guest:** Well, I'm glad you do like most of the cast, even if Zoey is an exception. And you really think Izzy's arm thing is weird in this, the weirdest Total Drama season yet? Oh well. And yeah, this cast was much more comfortable with Staci and Izzy than the canon cast were with Ezekiel, simply because was actually aggressive and inhuman and generally against the others, while the girls really weren't. Interesting predictions, and to answer your questions: 1) I didn't end up showing the idol being found directly (there just was never any good time); 2) those that make the merge this season will have a high chance of being in next season but it isn't an absolute guarantee and the same can probably be said of the World Tour newbies; 3) new ships are always a possibility but I haven't worked out all of All-Stars yet; 4) you'll just have to read on and find out who this week's cameo is.

 **moka evans:** I'm glad to hear that Cameron was one of your favorites last week! Likewise that you enjoyed Harold being back with people who respect him more, and even moreso that you liked my portrayal of Gwent. As you said, they can be difficult to pull off without things ending messily. I hope you enjoy what comes of Noah and Courtney's strategies, and I can see now why you expected Noah to get the make-up two weeks ago even if it's not something I would've done myself.

 **Guest 101:** Thanks! I wasn't sure how well Izzy's rather Courtney-like stunt would we liked, so I'm glad it wasn't hated.

 **I. M. Poik:** Yes, I suppose if nothing else he did leave his mark on the plot, at least as far as Staci is concerned. Plus he did help with some wins, and with developing Courtney and Gwen and Leonard and such. And...yeah, Izzy's new additions were inspired by a certain Aftermath clip that really struck me as being relevant to my needs. Not much else to say, so I hope you enjoy what happens next.

 **totaldramacodyfan20:** Well, I'm glad you liked it. And as I've said many, many times before I will be doing both Total Shuffled All-Stars and Total Shuffled Pahkitew island.

 **OMAC001:** Well, the thoughtless spontaneity and impulsiveness can continue, anyway. I'm glad you're looking forward to more Izzy this week.

 **PizzaTheBomb:** Yup, I think I've done a pretty good job of keeping the teams even, especially compared to canon which was 2 vs 5 at this point in the season. And yeah, the voting dynamic on the Rats is pretty complicated, and there's a lot of ways those four could go if it were to come to it. I really hope you and everybody else enjoys the lead up to the merge.

 **StayOuttaMyShed:** Well, I'm glad that I was at least able to successfully make him Courtney's second, even if the middleman aspect I also wanted didn't pan out. And I did consider having him go out by way of injury, but ultimately I decided it would be better to use his fear against him to still give a 'for his own good' sort of vibe with the elimination. I can't spoil the next couple eliminations, but I will say that I have been keeping the gender balance more in mind than I have in the past. I'm glad you enjoyed the Gwent developments last week, and yeah, the Rats got most of the focus simply because their dynamic was more interesting, and ultimately more relevant to the outcome of the episode.  
With Staci, yeah, a lot of what I did with her was probably fairly easy to predict. I did include an explanation for her being on the island above, so I hope that's acceptable. And her (and Izzy's) lack of hostility towards the cast may have made things a little less exciting in one sense, but I think just the mystery and general dynamic they provided made up for it.  
Other than that, interesting predictions as always. I look forward to seeing your reaction to the events of this week's episode.

 **FOWLKON:** Well, only Izzy and Courtney, but Courtney's still in the game, so... And yeah, the radiation at Chernobyl isn't enough to do anything close to the kind of mutation Staci got, but seeing how the series has always ignored how radiation, mutation, and toxic waste work, I figured it was an acceptable break from reality. I'm glad you enjoyed the portrayal of Gwen and Jasmine's claustrophobia, as well as my little shout-out to Zoey's method of dealing with Gwen's panic attack in canon. One of the better scenes from All-Stars, I think. And as for Noah...well, you're right in that right now he has an incentive to stay on Courtney's side, but like you said he's much more of a schemer here than in canon, and the game can shift quickly, so who knows...

 **Ddynamo:** Yup, Cameron was the most expendable last week, even if it is a little regrettable to me. And as for Izzy...I'm afraid you've read the wrong thing into it (and missed a certain...addition she showed off briefly). I honestly had forgotten completely about that gag in World Tour, but considering how it was only a short exposure I wouldn't have read much into it regardless.

 **CVluvFoxy:** First, I'll note on public record that I did go back, apologize, and answer your review. That aside, you're certainly right in that both Noah and Courtney have the potential to be powerful together - the problem is, they're stuck on a team with Gwen and Trent, another powerful duo as you said, making it hard for Noah or Courtney to act. I'm glad you enjoyed Gwen and Trent, of course, as well as Jasmine, and especially Staci as she doesn't have too many fans. Other than that, I'm glad you just enjoyed the episode so much as to call it your favorite!

 **DSX62415:** Ah, well, sorry to disappoint you in that regard. And yeah, Izzy's finally back in the game...she's certain to make things just a bit more interesting.

 **TheSnakeBehindTheAngel'sFace:** I'm glad you enjoyed it, especially Staci! I'm happy my decision to have her keep her mind has worked out so well. And yeah, as I've said myself, I'm a little disappointed to have done so little with Cameron, but ultimately the others just have more left to do. And as for Izzy...well, I hope you enjoy her again this week.

 **VIPGuest:** Ah, yup, that was one of the hints that Cameron was going to go home last week, so I'm glad you picked up on it. I'm a little disappointed you think Izzy's had too much screen time, but at least you're interested in what might become of her. And as for elimination predictability and sneakiness...well, who knows?

 **ashDanLand:** Well, I can see what you mean regarding Cameron being boring in canon. Still, I was hoping I could do just a little bit better job with him than I did, even if you did think I did a good job with him. I'm actually surprised that you didn't read enough of World Tour to know that Staci had changed so much, but oh well. And as for Izzy...well at the very least she'd handle being a mutant better than most people.

 **Star Saber21:** Thanks! Yeah, replacing aggressive Ezekiel with Staci and Izzy was a pretty easy choice to make for me, allowing for both the reintroduction of Izzy as a contestant as well as finally giving some explanation for Staci's current state. Writing both of them lurking in the mines was a bit of a challenge, but I'm glad it worked out so well. And yeah, Cameron may end up glad he's no longer around, if only because he won't have to deal with Izzy. I hope you enjoy what happens in this week's episode!

 **graveexcitement:** Ah, no worries, these things happen. I'm glad you're excited about Izzy's return. And I'm perhaps even more glad you picked up on that subtle little bit with Courtney and Noah, with Noah basically playing more-or-less dumb or at least passive in the eyes of the others. Courtney really has no idea what's been happening...but then again, who really does in a game like this?

 **Jaspher 4 Me:** Yup, it's really the turning point of the season in so many ways in canon - it ends Brick and Anne Maria's arcs, starts the end of Mike's, and the beginning of Scott's slow downfall. In the Shuffledverse...well, I can't say much, but I think it's a turning point as well in many ways. I'm glad you enjoyed the Gwen and Trent moments, and I hope you can accept the explanation of Staci's presence that I outlined above.

 **P. T. Piranha:** Thanks! And yeah, not all eliminations can be shockers, though some ought to and hopefully I can provide a couple more of those going forward. And you're spot on that a lot of the power dynamics this season are rather unwitting; they're the results of certain people having close bonds and being naturally well-liked rather than being an active strategy. It's definitely a change from, say, the shifting alliances of last season.

 **wifishark:** Mmm, yeah, that was another small hint that he was going home - a character sort of reflecting like that usually signals the end of their arc, I think. And yeah, while Izzy's return was practically inevitable, it was offset by the changing double elimination date. I hope you enjoy how it's dealt with.

 **C. DreadsFanfic. netBUM:** Well, I'm glad you think I did better with Cameron than in canon, at least. I do still feel that he can be interesting, I just...wasn't able to pull it off, I guess. Regarding the gender mix I can only say that I'm paying more attention to it than in past seasons. I'm glad you enjoyed so much of the episode, and I hope you can accept the explanation I gave for Staci above. And as for Izzy...well, you'll find out soon enough.

 **Explorer of the Unknown:** Hah, you're welcome. I'm glad you enjoyed Trent's role in last week's episode; though primarily focused on his relationship with Gwen, he's still a generally good guy with friends on the other team. The name thing, though...well, Trent might like it, but it's a little too sappy for Gwen. As for Staci, yeah, she's been thinking of herself as a werewolf for a while now so finding out that she isn't one, at least in the classical sense, is gonna be pretty disappointing. And Izzy...yeah, she was a disappointed that Cameron had such a poor reaction to seeing her again, since she's likes to think she's a likable person and such but might have to deal with the fact that it isn't always true. And I'm glad you feel like Cameron still was able to grow as a person, and I certainly agree that if I'd had more time to work with he could have had so much more to his character this season. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this week's challenge!

 **link9753:** It's always nice to hear when someone likes pretty much everyone, even those they normally don't. Hopefully I'll be able to keep that up. And yeah, between the extra contestant and lack of multiple easy eliminations, things are definitely gonna be interesting.

Welp, that's finally out of the way for the time being. All that's left are the usuals: the **_poll in my profile will remain up for the time being,_** and as always **_a TVTropes page for this series exists_** , and as per usual with such things, could always use more work. I thoroughly appreciate those who've already been working on it, and look forward to seeing what you all add next.

The current players are as follows:

Toxic Rats:Courtney, Gwen, Noah, Trent

Mutant Maggots: Jasmine, Zoey, Harold, Izzy

It's the last episode with the teams, so I hope you're ready for it. Enjoy!

\- Fangren

* * *

 **Episode 8 – The Treasure Island of Dr. McLean**

"Last time, on Total Drama Revenge of the Island!" The recap montage opened with several RCMP helicopters flying around before cutting to the Toxic Rats entering the mining elevator. "The players went on an impromptu environmental coveru-uh, _clean_ -up challenge," Zoey was shown comforting Jasmine at the bottom of the elevator shaft, then all three Maggots were shown running down a mineshaft, "and tried _not_ to get a toxic make-over like everything down there." Trent was shown struggling with Cameron and Gwen, both looking sickly, and a few shots followed of various mutant gophers running and squealing and dragging the Maggots into the earth.

" _Staci_ showed up," the host continued over clips of the wolfish young woman watching Gwen and Trent from afar, revealing herself to Cameron, and showing off the two statues the teams had come into the mine to find, "and it turns out she's actually a mutant. _Izzy_ showed up as well," the wild child was shown watching the Maggots from the shadows, getting pounced on by Jasmine, and speaking to Chris from inside the cage, "and it turns out she's even _more_ annoying than I remember", the host deadpanned. "And more terrifying too, at least to Cameron," he continued as the bubble-boy was shown recoiling in fright from his former teammate, "and so terrifying, in fact, that the Rats decided it would be best to get _rid_ of him." Cameron was shown standing in shock as Gwen apologized on behalf of the team, then getting hurled along with Staci by Izzy.

"Makes you wanna _reflect_ , don't it?" Chris asked as the last clips finished up. "Maybe...with a cup of Chris McLean Instant Coffee," he said as the scene cut to him standing on the docks holding a mug with his face on the side. He took a sip, his eyes went wide, and he spat it out. "Bitter... _better_!" he quickly corrected with a forced smile. "Better than the rest." He dumped the mug out into the lake, and a fish promptly surfaced where the drink had landed and vomited in disgust.

Chris held his awkward smile for a second before regaining his composure and walking to the side. "Who will survive? Who will wish they _didn't_? Find out right now, on Total! Drama! _Revenge_ , of the _Island_!"

xxx

(Fade to Opening Theme)

 _Dear Mom and Dad, I'm doin' fine;_

 _You guys are on my mind!_

 _Ya asked me what I wanted to be,_

 _And now I think the answer is plain to see!_

 _I wanna be...famous!_

 _I wanna live close to the sun!_

 _Well pack your bags, 'cause I've already won!_

 _Everythin' to prove, nothin' in my way;_

 _I'll get there one day._

 _'Cause I wanna be...famous!_

 _(Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

 _I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

 _I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

(Fade to Episode)

xxx

The light strumming of a harp accompanied an opening shot of the sun rising over the lake, a few seagulls calling in the distance. A peaceful tune rose up after a moment, and the camera slowly cut from close-up to close-up of the sleeping campers – Gwen and Trent, Courtney and Noah, Jasmine and Izzy, and Harold and Zoey. All eight of them were sleeping on wooden rafts in their usual clothes, until the shot cut to an alarm clock tied to a buoy with large acoustic horns next to the bell. The hands struck approximately 7 o'clock, the serene music scratched to a halt, and a loud ringing sang through the morning air.

Courtney and Noah bolted awake with a gasping start, and so did the Maggots, save Izzy, a few seconds later.

"Hold on, why are we out here?" Jasmine asked in confusion, the camera cutting outward to show the two rafts floating next to each other and the buoy-alarm amid a mass of debris mostly consisting of wood, furniture, and waste barrels. Each raft had a signpost with their respective team logo on it – the Rats on the left; the Maggots on the right.

"Oh no!" Zoey gasped, the camera coming out even further. "Chris must've set us adrift after we went to _sleep_!"

"I guess so," Jasmine said, scratching the side of her head as the camera moved behind the two girls, showing the island of Wawanakwa off in the distance. "Although come to think of it, I don't remember anything after dinner."

"Dinner! Of _course_!" Harold said in realization.

/

A dramatic note played as the footage flashed to a close-up of a meal tray, held by Harold as he collected his dinner. The meal was a slimy pile of spaghetti, tomato sauce, butt-shaped meatballs, and feathers, plopped down onto the tray without ceremony.

"Gosh, what is this?" Harold asked as the shot zoomed out to show his mild disgust.

"Turkey buttolini," Chef answered with a grin. "Enjoy your na~ap!" he said before realizing his slip-up. "Err, _meal_..."

Harold just raised a brow in confusion at the man as he laughed darkly to himself.

/

The scene flashed back to Harold, Jasmine, and Zoey. "Turkey contains the chemical _tryptophan_ , known to cause drowsiness," the dweeb mused. "So it stands to reason that _mutant_ turkey must be strong enough to knock us out completely!"

"I guess so," Jasmine replied uncertainly.

The harp music returned as the focus moved to Gwen and Trent, still sleeping peacefully on the raft. They were facing one another, and as they shifted and murmured their hands reached out and touched, then closed around each other.

"How _cute_ ," Noah said dryly as the camera moved to show him and Courtney looking down on their teammates. "And here _I_ am with nothing to take pictures of the happy couple!"

Courtney scoffed. "They're not a _couple_ ," she corrected him, "at least not yet. And you _know_ Gwen wouldn't want any pictures of her like this."

"Gee, I never would've guessed," the sarcastic snarker replied. "It _would_ be fun to tease her a little bit though."

"Like we need to give them a reason to vote you off," Courtney rolled her eyes.

Noah snorted. "Yeah, because they _totally_ have the same stick up their butt that you do," he said.

Courtney gasped indignantly. "What's _that_ supposed to mean?"

"That you're as uptight as a fully-packed _broom closet_ ," Noah answered. "It's no wonder Gwen likes spending time with Lover Boy more. Now are you gonna just stand there," he asked her as he bent down between their teammates, "or are you gonna help me wake these two up?"

Courtney hesitated for a moment, then knelt down next to Gwen.

xxx

"Okay, so I'm a little annoyed by the fact that we haven't merged teams yet," Noah confessed. "I can only assume our sadist of a host wants to drag things out a bit longer with Izzy back in the game, but whatever. As long as my team doesn't _lose_ again, I should be in a pretty good position once the merge does hit."

"Between Trent and Harold I _should_ be in pretty good with the Maggots," he said as the confessional footage cut away to a scene of him sitting at a meal table across from Trent, cracking a joke as Harold walked by and making both boys laugh. "And with our not-so-asocial social outcast being a few words away from going all 'teem movie' with her boy toy," the scene shifted to Trent and Gwen sitting in the common area outside the cabins, the musician practicing his guitar while the goth sat a little ways away and drew him, "that leaves _Courtney_ as the odd woman out."

"I don't know if she's _jealous_ of them or if she's just still annoyed that they aren't taking the game as seriously as she is," the scene panned away from the two lovers to show Courtney watching them from the porch of the Rats' cabin for a moment before frowning in annoyance and going inside, "but either way, it's not gonna take much for that kettle full of _rage_ she has to finally to a boil and get her voted out. There's no _way_ she'll make it past the merge."

"After that," Noah said thoughtfully as the scene cut back to him in the outhouse, "I'll probably just try to convince the others to vote out whoever the biggest threat is. That _might_ land me in some hot water, though," he conceded, "but lucky me I finally found _this_ the other day." He smirked, and took the wooden carving of Chris' head out from behind his back. "I doubt I'll have to use it anytime soon, but that just means it's all the more important that we _win_ today."

xxx

The scene finally cut back to the rafts as Noah and Courtney shook their teammates awake. The two mumbled groggily as they sat up, then looked around in bleary-eyed confusion.

"Dude, where are we?" Trent asked.

"Let me guess," Gwen said, "Chris did this?"

"Got it in one, sunshine," Noah answered dryly as the two got to their feet.

The shot cut over to Zoey, who was also trying to wake a sleeping teammate. Izzy was lying with her back to the indie girl, however, and no amount of light shaking seemed enough to rouse her. "Izzy, c'mon, wake up already," Zoey said, continuing to shake the girl nonetheless.

She stopped when Izzy quietly laughed, and the music rose dramatically as the girl suddenly turned around and yelled "Boo!", descending into wild laughter as Zoey gasped and fell backwards onto her butt.

"Izzy, don't scare me like that!" Zoey griped as her newest teammate stood up.

"Haha, you should have seen your _face_ ," Izzy laughed. "You _so_ didn't realize that I was awake this whole time and then when I turned around and scared you like that it was _so_ funny, you have _no_ idea."

"Uh, _yeah_...," Zoey said, rubbing her arm with a wary sort of anxiousness.

Jasmine stepped forward, and put a hand on the grinning girl's shoulder. "Look, Izzy, I think we'd all appreciate it if you took it easy with the practical jokes right now. We've got more important-" She trailed off upon noticing Harold leaning out from behind her and inspecting Izzy's arm with a magnifying glass, stopping upon noticing the two girls looking at him. "Uhh, is there something wrong, Harold?" Jasmine asked as Izzy turned and started making funny faces at the dweeb through his hand lens.

"Not that I can tell," Harold answered, quickly looking away from Izzy and pocketing the magnifying glass.

xxx

"There's no _way_ that Izzy could have survived for so long out in the forest without becoming a mutant," Harold told the outhouse camera. "And since Cameron was so tragically voted off last time, it falls on _me_ to investigate her. I just hope Jasmine won't be too _mad_ at me for closely examining another girl's body," the dweeb added nervously.

xxx

The static cut away to a shot of the rafts from a perspective a little higher, a little further away, and at a right angle to where the camera had been before. The roar of engines and the honk of a horn heralded the arrival of Chris and Chef from the right, the two men riding jetskis and wearing life jackets.

"Morning, suckers!" the host greeted with an exuberant grin. "How'd you enjoy your turkey buttolini?"

"Ehh, I've had better," Izzy shrugged nonchalantly. "You should have asked me to make it, I've become like a _genius_ at preparing mutant meat."

"Yeah, I'm sure you have," Chris replied with an annoyed and disbelieving look. "Anyway-"

"'Cause, I mean, I _did_ have to survive off what I could find in the wild," Izzy continued unabated. "Well, that and what I could scrounge up around camp and the craft services tent. Hey, when are you guys having lobster again? The leftovers from that were _so_ good, like, you don't even _know_."

"Never," the host answered, both he and Chef looking extremely irritated with the girl. "At least as long as you're around. Chef," he turned to his assistant, "be sure to have the interns increase security on the staff kitchen, okay?"

"I was thinkin' the same thing," the hulking man said gruffly.

Izzy just laughed. "Heeheehee, sounds fun!"

Jasmine and Zoey shared a wary look.

xxx

"Look, I'm not saying she was _wrong_ to take whatever food she could find," the survivalist confessed, "but I just don't think it's a good idea to admit that to Chris. He's pretty hard on us as is, and I don't think he'll get any better if he's mad at Izzy."

xxx

"Anyway," Chris said forcefully before regaining his usual demeanor, "first thing's first: If any of you are still trying to find that McLean Brand Invincibility Sculpture I hid at the beginning of the season," he announced, taking out a photograph of the head in question, "you can stop now. Somebody's already found it," he said, dropping the picture into the lake.

Courtney silently looked around at her teammates with suspicion in her gaze. "And _speaking_ of digging things up," Chris continued as the Maggots were shown watching him more than each other, "today's challenge is all about winning the _ultimate_ reward: _Life, itself!_ " His tone became deeper and more dramatic as he made his declaration, spreading his arms wide for emphasis. "Your first challenge is to race to the shore, by any means possible." He pointed a thumb over his shoulder, and the camera panned over to the island in the distance. "First team wins a handy reward. _Last_ team gets a heinous penalty, before you embark on a quest for _buried treasure_."

"First you have us blow up a mine, now you want us to dig up buried _treasure_?" Gwen asked. "What, are all the challenges from now on just things to make your life easier?"

" _No_ ," Chris said irritably, "and while there _was_ treasure here once, I found it _years_ ago. How do you think I bought the island?"

"Through all those crappy movies and songs you put out before becoming a host," Gwen smirked. "But I guess those were never _successful_ , were they?"

Chris' brow shot up in shock, and Chef casually snickered behind him. "J-just get moving already, will ya?" the host demanded, backing up his jetski then speeding away with Chef.

"Hah, nice one," Trent told Gwen as the focus moved to the Rats.

"Y-yeah, _real_ funny, Gwen," Courtney interjected with a slightly forced smile, quickly appearing on the goth's other side.

"Uhh, thanks?" Gwen told them, taken slightly aback by their sudden closeness but smiling softly anyway.

"Hey, are you three just gonna stand there or are you gonna come help me with this?" Noah asked, the shot cutting to him trying to break the rigid signpost.

"Huh? Oh, yeah, good idea Noah," the goth said, quickly turning around and moving to help him with Trent and Courtney following right behind. All of them grabbed on to the sign and pulled, and after a moment of effort the post snapped at the bottom.

"Cool," Trent said as he held the broken sign, "we can use this to paddle ourselves to shore."

"I'll do it," Courtney quickly volunteered, taking the broken sign from him. "I learned all about rowing when I was a CIT."

"Hey, fine with me," Gwen smiled, shooting the other girl a quick finger pistol. "Just watch out for sharks."

"Right..." Courtney said with an uncertain look.

The focus shifted over to the Maggots, who were watching their rivals with interest. "Let's just do what they're doing," Jasmine suggested, putting one hand on the top of their sign, bending it slightly, then snapping it with a swift kick.

"Ooh, let me!" Izzy volunteered excitedly.

"Why, do you have some sort of mutant _power_ that'll help?" Harold asked her with an almost accusing tone.

"No," the wild child said plainly, "I've just done a lot of river rafting. Here," she took the sign-paddle from Jasmine before the taller girl could react, "let me show you my technique."

"Uhh, okay, I guess," Jasmine said warily.

xxx

"Okay, how cool is it that I get to _do_ this again?" Izzy asked the confessional camera with an excited grin. "I mean sure, I had to live out in the mutated wilderness for a little bit and then I had to threaten my way back into the game, but it's all _fun_ , right?" She shrugged...with two more arms than she should have.

xxx

A rising note as the focus cut back to the Rats heralded the start of challenge music, and Courtney began to row with her sign-paddle. "Okay, time to put some _distance_ between us and the Maggots," she said, her eyes locked forward. "Stroke! Stroke!"

The camera cut outward, revealing that Izzy's own paddling was keeping the Maggots about neck-and-neck with the Rats, and the shot focused in on Noah, Gwen, and Trent. "Yeah, I hate to say it, but I think we might need more than just Courtney on this," the slacker said.

"Well, what else are we gonna do?" Trent asked. "It's not like there's any _oars_ floating around."

"I...guess we could always just get behind the raft and kick?" Gwen hesitantly suggested. "Although I wasn't exactly _kidding_ when I told Courtney to watch out for sharks..."

"Hey, the faster we get to shore, the less chance we have of becoming seafood," Noah said, walking to the back of the raft and jumping in to the lake. Gwen and Trent shared a wary shrug, then dived in as well.

/

The scene cut to the Maggots, Jasmine and Harold and Zoey standing anxiously near the back of their raft as Izzy continued to paddle them forward. A whoop of excitement caught their attention, and the shot zoomed out to show the Rats' raft moving ahead quickly in the foreground. With her teammates kicking in the back, Courtney was able to pause her paddling long enough to give her rivals a short but taunting wave.

"Well then," Jasmine said with a competitive smirk, "if _they_ can do it, then we can do it _better_. Into the water!" Zoey immediately nodded and dived into the lake, while Harold lingered with Jasmine. The survivalist took of her hat and blindly passed it back to Izzy, saying "Hold on to this, will ya?"

"Okay," the wild child said plainly and without looking, a third arm sort of... _appearing_ out of her back and taking the hat. Jasmine dived in to the lake without a look backward, leaving the camera to linger on Harold. He moved to dive in as well, then seemed to suddenly realize something and look backward.

The shot panned back on to Izzy as she eagerly paused her paddling to put Jasmine's hat on, with no sign of any extra arms.

Harold's brow furrowed and his eyes narrowed in suspicion, but it was quickly broken when Jasmine reached over from off-screen and pulled him into the water by the leg.

/

Another flash took the focus back to the Rats, but the camera quickly zoomed out as they noticed the Maggots coming up beside them again.

"Gah," Noah spluttered as he noticed their three kickers, "what, are you just gonna copy all our ideas from now on?"

"Hey, whatever gets us in the lead," Jasmine replied with a smirk. She began kicking even harder, and soon the Maggots had taken the lead.

"Yeah! Alright!" Izzy cheered as the focused moved to her. She closed her eyes and started giggling excitedly, but stopped abruptly along with her team's raft as it smacked into something that sounded pink and fleshy. She opened her eyes and looked warily ahead, the camera panning on to her reflection in the massive yellow eye of a truly gigantic octopus that was resting just below the surface with only the top of its head in view.

It shuddered, then bellowed deeply and angrily and lifted its tentacles out of the water. Izzy and her teammates screamed in terror.

The music paused as the shot cut to then sky above, where Chris and Chef were watching the challenge unfold in their helicopter. "Awww, it's _playing_ with them," the host laughed.

/

The music resumed as focus moved back to the Maggots, all four now on the raft with Harold and Zoey cowering in the back while Izzy and Jasmine – who had put her hat back on – attempted to fend off the many tentacles. The shot cut to Izzy as she cackled and jumped and flipped around the first two that struck at her, only for the third to grab her by the leg and lift her into the air. Jasmine, meanwhile, managed to repel one with a strong punch, but the second just wrapped around her arm and lifted her up as well. The camera zoomed out to show each of the two captives girls, and to their teammates' horror the octopus slammed them into each other then dropped them back onto the raft.

"Aww man, how are we supposed to get past that thing?" Trent asked as the focus cut over to the Rats' raft floating a little ways away.

"We're just gonna have to go around," Courtney answered, her wary eyes still locked forward. "With any luck the Maggots will distract it long enough for us to get away before it sees us."

"Well we're gonna have to do that _quick_ ," Noah said, fearfully eying a circling shark fin with Gwen and Trent, "because something _else_ just saw us!"

Courtney gasped as the shark circled around to the front and jumped onto the raft, revealing itself as Fang. As the mutant grinned menacingly at the young woman, she held up her sign-paddle in front of her. "W-wait," she said, "you don't want _me_ , do you? Isn't _she_ the one you're after?" she pointed forward, and Fang turned around. The camera briefly cut to Izzy swinging her own sign-paddle at the octopus while Jasmine desperately tried to rescue Harold and Zoey, who were now being strangled by its tentacles.

Fang grinned darkly, then jumped into the water. Courtney wiped the sweat from her brow, silently nodded at her teammates in the water, and together they got their raft moving again.

The music became even tenser as the focus moved back to the Maggots, the camera panning away from the two girls still fruitlessly trying to both rescue their teammates and fend off the octopus to show Fang's fin approaching them. Jasmine and Izzy looked back just in time to see the mutant shark leap from the water at them, and growl ferociously.

"Oh no, not _now_ ," Jasmine moaned.

Izzy just laughed. "Hahaha, not _this_ time, Fangy!" she said, whipping around as he pounced at her with the paddle-sign still in her hands. She suddenly sprouted two more arms and grabbed his, then thrust the sign into his mouth so that he couldn't close it. Harold, still struggling against the tentacle around his neck, raised his brow as he looked down at his teammate.

"Okay, y'know what? I'm _not_ going to ask what I just saw," Jasmine said frantically as the shot cut to her, "I'm _just_ gonna get us out of here." She reached forward and grabbed Fang's tail with both arms, then, to the shock of him and Izzy, swung him around with a grunt of effort and slammed him down hard on the octopus's head. It shuddered and bellowed in pain, then dropped its captives and sunk into the lake with the dazed mutant shark.

"Let's _go_ , Maggots!" Jasmine commanded, diving into the water with Izzy following shortly after. "Swim for your lives!" She and Izzy hastily swam off towards the right, with Zoey and Harold quickly joining them.

/

The challenge music leveled off as the scene flashed back to the Rats, slowly rafting along while looking warily around them.

"Okay," Courtney whispered back to her kicking teammates, "I think we're in the clear now."

Their raft promptly rammed in to something. She turned around, and yelped as the shot zoomed out to reveal the angered giant octopus surfacing in front of them.

"Yeah, I think you just jinxed us," Trent replied with an unamused look.

"Well it's gonna _eat_ us if we aren't careful," Gwen added fearfully, looking back over her shoulder and gasping as a couple tentacles rose up out of the lake. She, Trent, and Noah scrambled back on to the raft, and huddled together with Courtney.

"Well, there goes our chance of making it back to shore," Noah said before suddenly realizing something. "Un _less_...," he said, rubbing his chin in thought before stepping towards the octopus' head and motioning for his teammates to stand back. "Yeah, like I'm _scared_ ," he taunted it. "I doubt a monster movie reject like _you_ could hit the broad side of a _whale_ , much less smash the _raft_."

A dramatic note played as the octopus growled, glared, and drew closer, raising a tentacle high and curling it almost into a fist. Noah just crossed his arms and smirked haughtily, and his teammates gasped.

"Noah, what are you _doing_?!" Gwen cried out as another sharp beat played.

"Dude, no!" Trent added.

A third note played as the curled-up tentacle suddenly sprouted several large spikes, and the three Rats at the back of the raft screamed...

And then the footage and music ground to a halt, a 'pause' symbol appearing over the slightly-faded scene. "Will Noah's _brain_ outsmart the octopus's _brawn_?" Chris asked, standing up in front of the paused screen wearing a hat shaped like an octopus head and tentacles. "And what's up with Izzy?" he shrugged as an ominous chanting tune rose up in the background music. "Find out, after the break," he finished, crossing his arms coolly.

(Fade to Commercial and Back)

The background music promptly regained its former intensity as the episode resumed on the giant octopus with its spiked tentacle held menacingly over the Rats. It growled and reared the appendage back, prompting Noah to yelp and jump to the back with his teammates just before the front was slammed down upon, launching all four into the air.

They flew screaming across the lake, their shadows passing over the swimming Maggots, and finally they crashed down onto the rocky beach of Wawanakwa. The music petered out and they groaned in pain, and Courtney was the first to lift her head and look around.

"Wait a minute," she said with growing excitement, "we just made it to the island! We're in _first place_!" A feminine groan got her attention, and with a gasp she got to her feet and scrambled across the sand towards it. "Gwen, are you al-"

"Are you alright?" Trent finished, getting to Gwen's side first.

"I think I landed on a rock," the goth answered, rubbing her lower back as Trent helped her to her feet. "But I'll be fine."

"Good to hear," the musician smiled. "I'd hate for you to be taken out because of some stupid _rock_."

"Yeah, me too," Courtney quickly interjected. "And not just because it'd put the team at a _disadvantage_ , either."

"Thanks," Gwen smirked, "I wouldn't something like that to happen to you guys, either."

A muffled cry along the lines of "Would somebody help me already!" got the three's attention, and the camera panned over to Noah, half-buried in the sand with his legs sticking up in the air and flailing.

"Oh crap," Gwen said, quickly rushing over to him with Trent and Courtney right behind. "Sorry Noah, we didn't notice you," she said as they quickly grabbed his legs and pulled him out.

"Gee, I feel so _loved_ ," he said scathingly, spitting out a bit of sand.

"Well, at least that plan of yours worked out," Trent told him as a helicopter approached off-camera. "We _won_!"

"And because you won," Chris called down from above, leaning out the open door of the helicopter as a mildly triumphant tune played, "you get _these_!"

He dropped down two objects, which Trent quickly caught – one was a compass, and the other fell open to reveal a map of the island. "Sweet, man," the musician said as his teammates looked at their reward, "a map and compass!"

"I'll take those," Courtney said, swiping the objects away from Trent to his annoyance. "As a former Counselor-in-Training, I have _loads_ of orienteering experience."

"Weellll, look who just washed up!" Chris said, turning his attention to the edge of the water as Izzy, Jasmine, Zoey, and Harold finally swam ashore.

"That could've gone better," Harold wheezed before coughing up a small amount of water.

"You're telling me," Zoey said, patting him on the back then recoiling as Izzy shook herself dry like a dog.

"Put a sock in it!" Chris called down to them. "Now, the second part of today's challenge started off as a practical joke involving a couple of our Total Drama classic competitors. Buuuut, it's turned into more of a _rescue_ mission," he said, pointing a remote down at the beach and pressing the button.

The shot cut to the Rats as they turned and looked at a television cart that had just been wheeled over by a long-haired white male intern. The screen cut from static to none other than Topher, the Chris-loving wannabe host, trapped inside what appeared to be a somewhat spacious wooden coffin. He awoke on his belly and tried to push himself onto his hands and knees, but only bumped his head on the lid. "What? Wh-where am I?" he asked, rubbing his head and looking around in confusion. "I'm not, like, buried _alive_ , am I? Haha, c'mon, Chris," he laughed nervously and pounded on the low ceiling with his fist, "you can let me out now. Chris?" he repeated after a second, growing more and more panicked. " _CHRIS_?!"

"Whoa, you buried him _alive_?!" Gwen asked in sheer disbelief. "That's _horrifying_!"

"Yeah," Jasmine chimed in. "Not to mention _dangerous_." She shuddered in barely-suppressed fear.

"Hey, just be glad neither one of you got voted out last time," Chris told them. "Otherwise I would've stuck you in there with him. But, I _did_ keep the buddy system in mind," he admitted, "and thus made sure he wasn't the _only_ person buried underground."

The cast's direction moved back to live feed of Topher as the panicking suddenly heard the sound of snoring coming from within his prison. "H-hello? Chris?" he said, looking around and spotting a walkie talkie on the floor nearby. He quickly grabbed it. "Hello? Who's there? ...is it Chef?"

The camera zoomed in on the walkie talkie, then the live feed cut to static briefly before resuming on a close-up of another walkie talkie lying on a dark wooden floor, the sound of snoring coming from just out of sight. "Hey, is anybody listening? Wake up!" came Topher's desperate voice over it, and with a dramatic melody the shot zoomed out, revealing Sierra curled up asleep in another spacious wooden coffin. She murmured a little as Topher continued to attempt contact, but didn't stir.

"Yeah, she ate a _lot_ of Chef's buttolini," Chris explained as the focus cut back to the beach, "so she's still gonna be out for a couple more minutes. But once she wakes up and those two realize they only have each other to talk to, _man_ is it gonna be funny," he laughed.

"Not to _them_!" Gwen told him.

Chris just shrugged. "So what? Anywho, Rats! You've got your compass and map to the general vicinity of the chests at the other side of the island. First team to rescue one of the classic competitors wins the challenge, so _go_!"

Courtney, Gwen, Trent, and Noah ran off into the woods without another word, but as the Maggots moved to follow Chris landed his helicopter on the sand in front of them. "Uh-tu-tut-tut," he said, "not so _fast_. To the _losers_ , especially _Izzy_ ," the wild child was briefly shown raising an eyebrow, "go the _penalty belts_. Chef," he turned to his grinning assistant, "lock 'em in!"

The hulking man stepped out of the pilot's seat and walked over to the four Maggots, and the footage skipped ahead to him locking a metal belt around Harold's waist, with handcuffs attached to each side to keep his arms in place. The camera zoomed out and revealed that identical belts had already been locked onto his teammates.

"Gosh," the dweeb complained, struggling under the weight of the belt, "how much does thing weigh?"

"About 120 pounds," Chris answered before slotting a metal detector onto his back.

"Wait, how is a _metal_ detector supposed to help us find a wooden chest?" Zoey asked in confusion.

"It's not," the host smiled, taking out a red megaphone and shouting "Now _GO_! GO-GO-GO-GO!"

The Maggots promptly ran off into the woods.

/

The camera moved to a nondescript patch of ground somewhere, a muffled pounding sound coming from below it. Topher was then heard grunting in annoyance, and the scene cut inside his chest as he put his walkie talkie down, then frantically pulled out a cellphone. "Okay, if I'm being used in some kind of challenge," he complained as he started dialing, "then that is _so_ not cool, Chris."

A ringing came over the phone, and the screen split down the middle to show Chris answering on the left. "Hello~?" he opened with an almost mocking singsong voice.

"Okay, Chris, the joke's over," Topher said, "you gotta let me-"

He was interrupted by a sleepy "Wha...?" coming over another line, and quickly put his walkie talkie back up to his other ear.

"Hello? Who's there?" he asked into it.

"Uhh..." Chris said over the cellphone.

"Wait, is that _Chris_?" Sierra asked drowsily as the screen split into thirds with her on the right, grabbing on to her own walkie talkie. "And _Topher_?!" she added, becoming more awake and more angry with each passing moment.

"Sierra?!" Topher replied into the walkie talkie with disbelief. " _Sierra_?!" he turned and repeated into his cellphone. "You gave me a direct line to _her_?!"

"Yup," the host answered chipperly.

"Wait, was that _Chris_?!" Sierra asked. "Chris! You better get me out of here _right_ this instant!"

"Hey, he doesn't have to do what _you_ tell him to, you _ex-fan_ ," Topher retorted angrily.

"At least I was a fan to _begin with_ ," Sierra snapped back.

Chris just laughed. "Hah, yeah, I'm just gonna leave you kids alone for now. Have fun!"

"Wait, no!" the two rivals desperately pleaded before Chris ended the call, and their screens slid away.

He sighed happily as he stowed his phone back in his pocket. "Yeah, they'll be fine," he said to himself.

/

The challenge music resumed as the scene moved to the Rats, the four of them arriving at the edge of what the camera soon panned over to show was a massive swamp with smelly, bubbling green water dotted with toxic waste barrels.

Immediately the four began to cough. "Uggh, this reeks worse than my _dog_ after she rolled on a dead skunk," Noah pinched his nose and griped.

"Hmm...well, the map says there's a path _around_ the swamp," Gwen said, leaning over to look at the map in Courtney's hands.

"It looks like it'll take too _long_ , though," Courtney replied.

"Guess we'll just have to brave the stink," Gwen shrugged.

"I can carry you, if you want," Trent offered.

"No thanks," the goth told him. "I can handle a little swamp water."

Courtney giggled haughtily and put a hand on Gwen's shoulder. "Yeah," she told Trent with a sly smirk, "we don't need your help just because we're _girls_. We're strong enough without you. C'mon, Gwen," she said before running off into the swamp.

Gwen chuckled lightly, then shrugged. "Hey, she's not wrong," she told Trent before running off as well.

"Wow, man, looks like you screwed up a bit," Noah said dryly as he walked over to the musician.

"Hey, I never meant that she couldn't do it by herself," Trent told him in annoyance.

" _I_ know that, and _you_ know that," Noah told him. "Heck, I bet even _she_ knows that. But as far as _I_ can tell, Courtney doesn't. Although she was never your biggest fan to _begin_ with so who knows?"

Trent grunted in disgust. "Figures. I bet she's trying to turn Gwen _against_ me or something."

Noah shrugged. "Probably. But I don't think Gwen would ever fall for it. And personally," he added as he walked to the edge of the water, "I'd rather you all worked things out." He reluctantly dipped a foot into the water, shuddered in disgust, then waded in further.

"Well...that probably _would_ be better," Trent admitted, before running in to the swamp as well. He quickly passed Noah, prompting the lazier boy to start running as well.

/

A flash took the camera ahead to Gwen and Courtney as they continued to run through the pungent murk. "Sooo...how _are_ things with you and Trent, anyways?" the former CIT asked after a moment.

"Pretty good," Gwen answered happily. "I mean, I know you still don't like him," the camera briefly cut to Courtney's look of surprise, "but he's really sweet, and funny, and _talented_...I _really_ like him, and I think we have a great connection, y'know?"

Courtney's expression became thoughtful. "...wow, that's...great...," she said. "But do you really think you'll be okay once the merge hits and you have to compete against each other again?"

Gwen looked back with a brow raised in mild confusion. "Why wouldn't we? I bet we could go all the way to the _finale_ together and still be cool."

She looked ahead again, missing the look of surprise and hurt on her companion's face.

/

A large purple dragonfly landed atop a stump in another part of the swamp. A pale purple frog sitting on a lilypad nearby promptly shot its tongue out at the dragonfly, only to yelp as the insect caught the tongue in its mouth and bit down hard.

The camera panned to the left, showing the edge of the swamp again, a low but fast tune playing as the Mutant Maggots arrived.

"Ewww, it _reeks_ ," Zoey immediately complained, her face scrunched up in disgust.

"You get used to it eventually," Izzy told her offhandedly.

Jasmine knelt down as much as she could with her penalty belt still on, and squinted at the dirt. "I'm pretty sure there's footprints leading into the swamp," she told her teammates. "The Rats must've gone this way."

"Makes sense to me," Izzy said happily.

"Hey, I don't suppose you can use those extra arms of yours to help us get through this place, can you?" Harold asked.

"What extra arms?" Izzy replied in confusion.

"The ones you used to hold off Fang earlier," Harold explained. "I saw them, I'm sure of it."

Izzy gave him a blank look and frowned in thought. "Nnnnnooo, I don't think I did anything like _that_."

"But-" Harold objected before he caught Jasmine shaking his head.

"I'm sorry, Harold, but we don't have the time. Let's get moving," she said before running into the swamp. Harold groaned, then followed after her along with Zoey and Izzy.

The camera lingered after they left, just long enough to catch the the dragonfly from earlier buzzing out of the swamp still carrying the frog by its tongue.

/

The music turned tense again as the scene moved back to the Rats, Trent having joined back up with Gwen and Courtney while Noah lingered a little ways back.

"Well, we haven't gotten stuck in the mud or anything yet," Gwen said. "It's still _disgusting_ , but at least we're making progress."

"True," Courtney smiled, looking away from her map and back at them. "I'd say we have this challenge ...in the _bog_!" She laughed at her own pun, and smiled again as Gwen and Trent chuckled as well.

"Hah, yeah," the musician said. "So, how close are we anyway?"

"Hmm...," Courtney said, looking back at her map...and unwittingly walking up onto something rough and green and scaly. "According to this, it shouldn't be much-"

She was cut off by an ominous growling below her, and looked down and ahead just as the small, beady eyes of an alligator rose above the surface of the swamp.

The mutant beast promptly reared up, revealing its long tusks, spines, and tentacle-like forelimbs and tossing both Courtney and the map into the water. She, Gwen, and Trent quickly went back and regrouped with Noah, and all four screamed and ran forward just before the mutant alligator pounced onto the spot they'd just been standing in.

"Quick, get in that tree!" Courtney exclaimed, the camera following her point forward to a large tree in the swamp ahead of them. The four quickly ran over to it, Trent giving Noah a boost into it before scrambling into the branches himself.

"Hurry up, it's coming back!" Courtney told them as the boys pulled Gwen up into the tree next. The ex-CIT looked back over her shoulder and bit her lip in fear as the shot quickly cut to the massive mutant swimming towards them, then roaring and pouncing. Courtney gasped in fear, but was pulled up just in time and the alligator slammed head-first into the tree's protruding roots. The whole tree shook, but the camera panned up to show that the Rats had managed to hang on – Courtney between Gwen and Trent on the left; Noah alone on the right.

"Thanks," Courtney told the two who'd pulled her up, smiling awkwardly.

xxx

Courtney opened her confessional with a sigh. "Look," she told the camera, "I really do enjoy being around Gwen, and...I guess maybe Trent isn't _that_ bad, but I still stand by what I've been telling Noah. So long as Gwen and Trent are, you know, _together_ , they're gonna be hard to deal with. And while being their third sounds nice in _theory_ , there's no _way_ they'll let me get in to the finale if we're the final three. I know that the final two is usually decided by sudden death, but still – I can't risk them ganging up on me. But I can't just vote out _Trent_ and still expect Gwen to be my ally...so I guess all I can do right now is make sure we win."

xxx

"Hey, can we _leave_ before that thing wakes up?" Noah asked, the camera panning up from a shot of the stunned mutant alligator lying at the base of the tree.

"Good idea," Gwen told him before dropping back down into the water. Her teammates joined her, and the shot quickly focused in on Courtney as she patted her sides and pockets with growing dread.

"Crap, I lost the map," she swore.

"No big deal," Trent told her. "I still have the compass," he took the item in question out of his pocket and held it up, "so as long as you know which direction we had to go we should be okay."

"Right," Courtney said warily, one eye on the mutant alligator as she started creeping away. "It should be this way," she pointed, breaking into a run once she was far enough away from their attacker. Her teammates quickly followed, but the camera panned in the opposite direction to show the four Maggots watching from behind another tree.

"Okay," Jasmine said, "let's just circle around a bit and avoid any trouble from that _big guy_."

"Uhh, I think we're gonna have trouble regardless," Zoey spoke up nervously, drawing the survivalist's attention behind the group to a pair of smaller, paler alligators that were swimming towards.

Jasmine turned around and smiled confidently. "No worries, I can take care of those two little fellas in a snap," she said, trying and failing to move her arms up in preparation. "Or...I _could_ if it weren't for this _belt_...," she nervously corrected.

The two smaller alligators hissed menacingly, prompting Harold and Zoey to scream and jump back while Jasmine hesitantly stood her ground, and Izzy...grinned. With a dramatic rise in the music one of the alligators pounced, and Izzy jumped forward, sprouted two extra arms from nowhere, and caught it in a headlock prompting her teammates to gasp in shock. The second alligator quickly came after her, but Jasmine swiftly stomped it on the side of the head.

"Get outta here!" she yelled at it, kicking it in the chin again. It yelped and swam away, leaving its companion still struggling with Izzy on its back.

The wild child laughed as the alligator thrashed around in the swamp water, and her teammates warily approached her. "Oh," Harold spoke up first in an accusing manner, "so you didn't know what I was talking about with the extra arms, huh?"

Izzy looked at him blankly as the alligator paused its thrashing. "Ohhhh, _these_ extra arms!" she said as if in sudden comprehension.

"What do you mean ' _these_ '?" Harold asked, now bewildered. "What other arms could I have been talking about?"

"These," Izzy answered plainly, sprouting a third set of arms to her teammates' shock. The alligator tried to throw her off again, but she quickly punched its head with her new limbs. "Hey! Stop that!" she scolded.

Harold's shock quickly dropped into a look of even greater bewilderment than before, a sentiment that Zoey and Jasmine seemed to share. "But...that still doesn't make any _sense_ ," he said.

Once again the alligator stopped struggling, and once again Izzy gave her teammate a blank look. "Huh," she said, rubbing her chin thoughtfully with one hand, "I guess it _doesn't_ , does it?" She stood up off the pale alligator, and the reptile quickly took the chance to swim away. Izzy waved it off happily.

"So wait," Zoey spoke up in confusion, "Izzy, you're a _mutant_?"

"Yup," Izzy nodded happily.

"But...you're so... _normal_ -looking," Zoey continued as the shot cut away to Izzy smiling at her four extra hands, making shadow puppet shapes and hand signs with them. "You know, all things considered," the indie girl hastily added.

"Actually," Harold said with a thoughtful expression, "since every creature is affected by chemical waste differently, it only makes sense that some mutations wouldn't be as extreme. But I still don't get why you didn't tell us before," he told Izzy.

She shrugged, now with only one set of shoulders. "I thought it'd be more fun this way. And it was!" she started to laugh, but stopped quickly. "Still, sorry for messing with you guys. I guess I just can't help my natural spontaneity!"

"Umm...yeah," Jasmine said uncertainly. "Let's just get moving, shall we? Who knows how far the Rats have gotten by now." She ran off to the right, and her teammates quickly followed.

The camera kept on them, and it wasn't long before Jasmine's question was answered as the Maggots came upon their rivals lingering on the outskirts of a massive forest of thorn bushes. "Aaaand, there goes our _lead_ ," Noah said in annoyance as he noticed the four new arrivals.

"Oh man, how are any of us gonna get through this?" Zoey asked in awe and horror.

"Who says we have to," Jasmine said, a smirking forming on her lips as she motioned for her teammates to follow her on a route closer to the camera and around the thorns.

The Rats shared a look of wide-eyed shock. "Yyyyeah," Gwen said dully, "we probably should have thought of that."

She, Courtney, Trent, and Noah quickly ran off after the Maggots.

/

A flash took the scene to the edge of a clearing with the thick thorn bush forest visible a little ways in the background. Jasmine, Izzy, Zoey, and Harold arrived from the left, and immediately looked around.

"Is this the place?" the indie girl asked as the group moved further into the clearing.

"Hard to say," Jasmine replied.

"Get me out!" the muffled-yet-distinct voice of Topher called from underground, immediately attracting the Maggots' attention.

"No, get _me_ out!" Sierra retorted from a little ways towards the edge of the forest, also drawing the Maggots' attention.

The two pleas were followed up by the arrival of the Rats. "Okay, this looks like the place," Courtney told her teammates. "There was a clearing on the map."

"But where do we start digging?" Trent asked.

Noah cupped his hands around his mouth and shouted "CHRIS MCLEAN IS A TALENTLESS _HACK_!"

" _Hey_!" the two captives indignantly replied, drawing the Rats' attention to their relatives locations underground.

"Score," Gwen said, bumping fists with her long-time teammate. "Great job, Noah."

"Don't thank me," he smirked, "thank _their_ pointless devotion."

"C'mon, let's get digging," Courtney said, leading the rest of her team toward where the closest voice had come from – Sierra, near the edge of the forest.

The camera panned back to the Maggots. "Well, I guess that leaves us with Topher," Jasmine said.

"On it," Izzy said with an excited grin, a dramatic tune playing as she sprouted her four extra arms, then jumped over towards where Topher's voice had come from and started digging.

"I hate to say it," Harold told Jasmine and Zoey as the camera panned to them once more, "but as cool as Izzy's mutation is I don't think it's gonna be enough here. We need more hands to dig."

"But how are we gonna get out of our belts?" Zoey asked while Jasmine narrowed her eyes and peered at the metal detector still sticking up from Harold's back.

A sudden realization hit her, and she smiled. "The metal detector, of _course_!" she said, earning her friends' attention. "Even Chris wouldn't just give us something _completely_ useless," she reasoned. "Well, not to only _one_ of us, anyway."

"So there must be something metal around that can help us out!" Zoey added.

"Like a _key_!" Harold declared bending down at the waist so his detector could get a scan of the ground.

/

The footage skipped ahead again, briefly panning from the Rats digging their hole, to Izzy digging hers, to Zoey and Jasmine following Harold up to a rock located on the other side of their team's hole. A whooping bleep from the metal detector caused them to gasp in excitement, and Jasmine quickly knelt down and lifted the rock up to reveal a key ring with two keys on it.

"The small one's probably for the cuffs," she said, picking the keys up and inserting the smaller one into Harold's belt.

"So that means the _bigger_ one...," the dweeb thought for a second, rubbing his wrists after his belt fell off, "must be for the _chest_!" he declared in sudden realization, the camera zooming out to show Zoey's belt falling off and the indie girl taking the key and inserting it into Jasmine's belt.

"Alright," the survivalist smirked as the camera panned up to her rubbing her wrists, tense challenge music welling up in the background once more, "let's win this." The shot zoomed out as she pulled the metal detector off Harold's back and ran off with it, her friends following close behind.

The shot cut to the Rats' hole as Noah lifted his head, looked back towards the Maggots, and narrowed his eyes in suspicion. "Wait a minute..." he said slowly before his eyes popped open in realization. " _Crap_ ," he said, scrambling out of the hole and running off to the side.

Courtney looked up as he went past and gasped indignantly. "Noah, what are you doing? We've almost got her uncovered, you can't let the Maggots get the lead _now_!"

"I know," Noah replied frantically as he started turning over rocks and looking in bushes, "that's why I gotta find... _yes_!" With breathless excitement he held up another key ring identical to the one the Maggots had found, and rushed back over to his teammates. "We need the key to open the chest," he explained as he hopped back into the hole and started digging again.

The screen split into two to show each team as they dug, the Rats on the left and the Maggots on the right – including six-armed Izzy and Jasmine using the metal detector as a shovel. Both teams stopped suddenly, with three members leaving the holes while Noah and Jasmine bent down with keys in hand.

The lids of each chest swung open at the same time, with Sierra and Topher sitting up and taking in a deep breath of fresh air.

"I'm _free_!" Sierra declared. "And before _him_ , too," she added with a dirty look to her left.  
"I'm _free_!" Topher declared. "And before _her_ , too," he added with a dirty look to his right.

The two gasped in shock and outrage as the shot pulled out to show the Rats and Maggots nervously looking in each other's direction.

"Umm, hellooo, I was _totally_ the first one freed," Sierra said, closing her eyes brattily.

"Uhh, _no_ ," Topher countered, "I think it's obvious that _I_ was the first one to be rescued."

"Actually," Chris called down to them all, the split screen fading as he arrived in the helicopter, "as far as I can tell you were freed at the exact same _time_ ," he announced in annoyance. "Because of this, _nobody_ wins the challenge," he added to the shock of the campers.

"Told ya you shoulda put those two in the same chest," Chef told the host.

"I _know_ ," Chris said, giving him a withering look before turning a dark grin back downward. "Because of this, and because we're up a person anyway thanks to _Izzy_ ," the shot briefly cut to the two-armed wild child who grinned and waved as her name was spoken in a bitter tone, "I've decided that _both_ teams will be voting someone off tonight."

Everyone gasped, including Sierra and Topher.

"And to make it even _more_ interesting," Chris continued, his dark grin growing even darker, "let's have the _Rats_ vote off one of the _Maggots_ , and the _Maggots_ vote off one of the _Rats_."

Everyone gasped again, but Topher quickly grinned. "Hey hey, great idea Chris! That's sure to lead to some _premium_ drama."

"Stop trying to suck up to him, it's never gonna work," Sierra shot at her arch-enemy. "And besides, this twist is _completely_ unprecedented, and _completely_ unfair. Trust a jerk like _Chris_ to not give people a chance to save themselves," she said, putting her hands on her hips and scowling up at the former object of her obsession.

"Thanks, both of you," the host grinned, "I really appreciate it. Maggots! Rats!" he looked down at the two teams, each show watching nervously in turn. "I'll be seeing _all_ of you, tonight." He laughed as the helicopter flew off, and the camera panned down to the downtrodden campers.

Noah in particular groaned and pounded the ground in frustration. "Don't take it too hard, Noah," Gwen said, putting a hand on his shoulder. "Had it not been for you, we'd have lost entirely. Now at least they'll lose someone too."

The camera panned over to Jasmine as she raised a thoughtful eyebrow.

xxx

"Hmm...," she thought in the outhouse confessional, "I _wonder_..."

xxx

An owl hooted in the distance as the static cut away to a shot of the moon, the camera panning down onto the four members of the Toxic Rats walking back towards their cabins.

"Okay, just so we're clear," Trent said as a slow, plodding, but mysterious tune began to play, "we're all voting for _Izzy_ , right?"

"Oh yeah, _definitely_ ," Gwen answered bluntly.

"Who'd _want_ to keep that girl around?" Noah added.

"Well, looks like we're all agreed," Courtney finished with a slightly awkward smile.

"Yup, looks like it," Trent said as the ex-CIT stopped in place and he, Gwen, and Noah headed up the steps of their cabin.

"You coming inside, Courtney?" Gwen asked.

"In a bit," Courtney answered with a slightly hint of nervousness. "I'm just...gonna use the bathroom real quick." Gwen shrugged and headed inside, and Courtney let out a breath before walking away.

/

The scene flashed not to the bathroom, but to the side of the mess hall where Courtney was carefully sidling against the wall. The shot zoomed in as she reached the corner and looked behind it, then pumped her fist and whispered "Knew it." The camera continued following her as she went behind the building, and tiptoed over to Izzy who was sticking half out of an open trash can.

"Izzy, I need to talk to you," Courtney said, pulling the wild child out of the garbage and cringing as she saw her gnawing on a slightly-moldy chicken leg.

Izzy spit it out and laughed. "Sorry. Old habits die hard, y'know?"

"...right," Courtney said dully, giving a quick and wary look around before pulling her former teammate closer to the building. "Look, I just want you to know that right now, Gwen and _Trent_ are easily the strongest duo in the game. We _all_ like them – me and Noah probably like Gwen better, while your team prefers _Trent_ , but it still means it's gonna be hard for someone _else_ to win the competition. Do you understand what I'm saying?"

Izzy rubbed her chin in thought for a second, then nodded. "Oh yeah, I gotcha."

Courtney hesitantly smiled. "Well...good. I just wanted to make sure you knew that, so...I'll just be going now." As she spoke she cautiously backed away from the other girl, then turned around and hustled away once she reached the corner of the building.

Izzy shrugged, then dived back into the trash can she'd been foraging in.

xxx

"Okay," Courtney confessed, "so maybe it's not the _best_ way of going about it, but it's probably the only one open to me. And since we're gonna vote out Izzy anyway, I might as well get some use out of her, right?" She looked at the camera pleadingly, but her expression soon fell into a scowl. "Don't _judge_ me, alright? I want to _win_ , even if I have to get the crush of the closest thing I have to a _friend_ out here eliminated."

xxx

The static cut away to the girls' side of the Maggots' cabin, where all four members of the team were gathered – Zoey and Izzy on their beds on one side; Jasmine leaning against a bunk opposite them with her arms crossed, and Harold nervously yet curiously looking around a bit to the side.

"Alright, we need to decide which Rat we're voting off," Jasmine opened. "Preferably their biggest threat."

"Ooh, what about Gwen and Trent?" Izzy suggested. "They're, like, a couple, right? Might have to get 'em _now_ while they're _fresh_."

Zoey cringed. "I don't think I can do that to Trent," she said. "I mean, they're barely even _together_."

"Good point," Jasmine said. "We'll probably have to deal with them eventually, but for now it might be better to let them enjoy each other. Plus," she straightened up a little and dropped her arms, giving the side window a brief look, "we need to be careful about that invincibility statue." Immediately, the other three Maggots perked up in attention. "Now I'm gonna level with you," Jasmine continued, "I tried to find it a couple times but came up short. You _know_ I'd tell you two if I'd found it," she said to Zoey and Harold who each nodded.

"Same here," the dweeb admitted. "Wherever it is, it isn't with me."

"I...kinda forgot about it a little," Zoey said sheepishly, rubbing the back of her neck as the camera moved to her.

She looked over at Izzy, who shrugged. "When you're living off the wild," Izzy said in a calm, almost matter-of-fact tone, "you don't really _need_ invincibility statues."

"Right," Jasmine said. "That means one of the Rats must have it."

Zoey gasped. "Who do you think it could be?"

"Harold, you spent the most time with 'em," the survivalist said, turning her head to the boy on her right, "care to share your thoughts?"

"Of course, my trusted and attractive teammate," Harold answered with a bow. "To be honest, I don't think Gwen would've looked for it. She's a little too laid back."

"In that case," Zoey said thoughtfully, "I guess we can rule out Trent, too."

"Exactly," Harold nodded. "If you ask me, it's gotta be _Courtney_. She's so bossy and controlling there's no _way_ she wouldn't wanna get her hands on it." Izzy nodded in agreement.

"Hmm...," Jasmine said, rubbing her chin in thought. "What about Noah, then? I've seen him around in the woods a couple times."

"Noah? He's been going jogging to try and get in better shape," Harold said.

Jasmine shook her head. "Sorry, but unless 'jogging' means something different in Canada I don't think checking under rocks and bushes counts." Harold's brow shot up in surprise. "And considering how he figured out they'd need a key today, I'd say he's pretty smart, probably enough to find the statue."

"So...who do we vote for, him or Courtney?" Zoey asked.

"Well, we should try and flush the statue out now and get it out of the way," Jasmine reasoned. "My gut says to go with Noah, but a vote for either one of them is good. Just go with who you think is best, I guess."

A silence fell over the Maggots, punctuated by a few dramatic notes as they looked at one another.

/

The scene flashed to a long-distance shot of the island, the dramatic notes transitioning into the slow and tense elimination theme. Another flash, and the camera cut to the campfire pit where the two teams were waiting nervously – Rats on the left, Maggots on the right. Chris walked up to his oil drum podium bearing not a tray of marshmallows, but a thick stack of small, yellowed paper. Chef Hatchet was by his side, and though he still had his massive tongs he was without his hazmat suit or the strongbox containing the Toxic Marshmallow of Loserdom.

"Okay players," Chris opened, "the votes for both teams have been tallied. The first loser _is_..."

"Wait," Harold interrupted, "what about the marshmallows for those of us who _aren't_ going home?"

"No can do," the host shook his head rather jovially. " _Someone_ raided the stash and ate all of them," he said, giving a pointed look at Izzy who grinned and laughed.

"Hahaha, sorry, I was just hungry, y'know?" she said before, to her shock, Chef's tongs clamped down around her arms. "Hey, I said I was sorry!" she said, sprouting another pair of arms to try – and fail – to pry herself free.

"Yeahhhh," Chris told, "but the Rats voted you off, and I just didn't want you escaping like last time."

"Awww...," Izzy said, drooping sadly while her teammates let out breaths of relief and Gwen and Noah high-fived.

"And _speaking_ of the Rats," Chris continued, turning his attention to the four on the left as they suddenly became tense again. "With three votes against them, the other person going home tonight is..."

The music reached its tensest trill as Trent and Gwen shared a nervous look then reached out and held hands; then Gwen turned her nervous gaze to Courtney, who crossed her fingers and bit her lip; then Courtney looked over at Noah, eyes wide and fingers digging in to his legs.

" _Noah_ ," the host finally said.

All four Rats gasped in shock, with Noah naturally recoiling the most. He quickly settled into a resigned scowl, however, and stood up. "Okay, for the record," a deep note was struck, "I didn't wanna have to do this...but I'm _not_ going home tonight." He took the Chris Head Statue out of his pocket, and held it up for all to see as another deep note was struck.

Everyone gasped.

" _Whoa_ ," Gwen said in awe, a trio of softer notes preceding yet another deep one.

"The _invincibility statue_!" Chris said in amazement as yet another a deep note was struck. " _Nice_! That means, Noah is _safe_." Another deep note. "Whoever has the next most votes is taking a _ride_ on the Hurl of Shame!'" A light trill, followed by another set of deep notes. "And thanks to _Izzy_ , that's gonna be _Gwen_!"

" _WHAT_?!" all the campers except Izzy exclaimed as the series' sombre farewell theme immediately began to play.

"Izzy, why didn't you vote for Noah or Courtney like we planned?" Zoey asked, the camera briefly cutting to the ex-CIT's quick scowl before moving to the wild child.

"Hey, you guys said to go with who I thought was best, so I did," Izzy shrugged.

"And why was that _me_?!" the goth asked in desperate and anguished disbelief.

"I don't know. Courtney said you would be a threat, and it made a lot of sense to me," Izzy said calmly.

" _Courtney_?!" Gwen repeated in shock, quickly whirling around to her now ex-teammate who seemed to shrink into herself under the accusing glares she was getting from Gwen, Trent, and Noah. "Courtney, how _could_ you? I thought we were _friends_!"

"I...I never thought she'd vote for _you_ ," Courtney stammered out an explanation. "I was expecting her to vote for _Trent_!" She motioned to the musician, not looking at the harsh glare he was giving her.

"Yeah, because that makes it _so_ much better," Gwen said scathingly, standing up and looming angrily over Courtney. "You know, even though you were a major-" her next word was bleeped out and caused her ex-roommate to flinch, "at the beginning of the season, I really thought you'd changed. But I guess I was wrong. You had your chance, you blew it, and now we're _done_."

She spun on her heel and walked away, leaving Courtney to fold her hands and look down sadly.

/

The sombre tune continued as the scene cut to the docks, where Izzy – now wearing one of the penalty belts and two pairs of handcuffs on her extra arms – was already loaded into the Hurl of Shame, and Gwen started climbing in as Chris and Chef watched on.

"Wait," Trent said, causing the goth to pause and look back as he ran up to her. "I need to tell you something before you go."

Gwen dropped down to the dock and looked at Trent with a nervous but expectant expression. She said nothing, and the musician took a breath and then her hands. "I know we haven't known each other for very long," he began, looking downward. "But I really feel a connection to you. And I think...I think it's _love_ ," he said raising his head and meeting Gwen's gaze. They both smiled. "Will you...go out with me?" he asked.

"Yes!" Gwen answered immediately and elatedly, darting forward into a deep embrace.

"Uhh, can you two hurry this along?" Chris asked them impatiently.

"Oh, _shove off_ McLean," Gwen turned and told him, shoving him into the lake to the laughter of all who were present.

She then looked back at Trent, and the music rapidly rolled into something more touching as she pulled him into a kiss.

"Awww," Izzy cooed from the catapult bucket while Chef Hatchet wiped away a few tears of his own.

The two lovers broke their kiss, and Gwen smiled. "You better win this, okay?" she told her boyfriend. "And give _Courtney_ what's coming to her."

"Got it," Trent laughed.

The sombre farewell song resumed as Gwen reluctantly walked back and climbed up into the bucket of the Hurl of Shame next to Izzy. "Goodbye," she said sadly, waving down at Trent then moving her gaze over to the shore where Noah, Harold, Zoey, and Jasmine were watching. She waved at them too, and they returned the gesture with sad smiles of their own. The shot panned over to Courtney, also waving sadly, but Gwen just closed her eyes and looked away.

And then, without warning, she and Izzy were sent flying into the night with a scream and a cackle.

The camera panned down to Chris, dripping wet and holding the catapult's lever with a rather angry expression. He took a deep breath, stood up straight, then turned to face the camera with his usual smiling demeanor as the usual cymbal beats opened the series' capstone theme. "And that's _two_ for the price of one. Come back for even _more_ painful awesomeness, next time, on Total! Drama! Revenge, of the Island!"

(Fade to Credits)

* * *

 **Author's Note - Post Script**

And there you have it, folks, the final eliminations of the second third of the season - and for both teams. Izzy's was obvious, but Gwen's was...less so. Well, I did know I wanted to eliminate her here since it would keep the genders balanced going in to the merge and would force Trent to be on his own. But the exact method took some considerable figuring out, and ended up sculpting both the entire second half of the challenge into what you all just read, and the ending of the previous chapter.

See, I didn't decide which team to put Izzy on until rather late in the process of writing episode 7 since I knew it would have to set up her and Gwen's elimination. I first considered putting Izzy on the Rats, as it was her original team, forcing a double elimination, and trying to split the votes up so that a possible idol play from Noah would cause Gwen to be voted off. But...that would require two votes for Izzy, two for Noah, and one for Gwen, and that just wasn't plausible as nobody on the Rats would have any reason to vote for and even less for Gwen. So then I decided to put Izzy on the Maggots, force a tie in the challenge, and go from there. Izzy getting booted by Jasmine, Harold, and Zoey was still obvious, but again - nobody was gonna vote for Gwen on the Rats. In that situation, Noah would have absolutely decided to throw Courtney under the bus even after trying to get her and Trent to make up. I mean, he really wouldn't have a choice - if he votes off Gwen or Trent, then the other would almost certainly turn against him going forward and put a target on his back.

So I couldn't have a single-team double elimination...and I couldn't have a normal two-team double elimination...so I came upon the idea of having the teams vote out one of their rivals. Izzy was still and easy bet, and this would open up the possibility of a Gwen blindside by way of making Noah out to be enough of a threat that episode for most of the Maggots to target him, prompting him to play his idol and force out the lone dissenting vote, which obviously should come from Izzy as she's not as likely to go along with the others. And I knew I wanted Courtney to have a hand in Gwen's elimination, so it was fairly easy to see the way forward: have Courtney try to influence Izzy against Gwen and Trent, and thus hopefully pass it along to the other Maggots. But while Courtney would have preferred Trent going home, she could easily make her wording vague enough that Izzy would go for Gwen instead, and unintentionally ruin Courtney in the process.

Anyway, once I knew the tie was gonna be a thing, I knew i had to change the challenge a bit. With no obvious choices for one of this season's campers to show up again, I figured it would be a good idea to have two chests and cameos instead of one. And that meant Topher and Sierra, since they're an obvious duo that wouldn't enjoy being stuck with only being able to talk to one another. I will say that, at one point in my process of writing this season, I had considered eliminating Gwen over Cameron last week, allowing me to stick her and Sam in the chest again.

Oh, and one last thing just to clarify: Izzy's arms aren't always present. She can basically grow as many as she likes, though has only done up to the extra four so far. She can probably also lose her original arms as well, but that never really came up in story.

So...yeah. That's the story of this episode, pretty much. I hope you enjoyed everything!

Next week is the merge, so get excited folks.

\- Fangren

* * *

 **Appendix: TSROTI Eliminated Contestants**

Cody - (13th Place)

Izzy - (RETURNED | Formerly AWOL)

Leonard - (12th Place)

Justin - (11th Place)

Lindsay - (10th Place)

Cameron - (9th Place)

Izzy - (Tied for 7th Place | Mutated, but captured)

Gwen (Tied for 7th Place)


	9. Chapter 9 - Grand Chef Auto

**Author's Note**

Hard to believe it's only been a little over two months since this series began, but we're already at the merge. I say this so often, but the shorter season just makes things go by so much faster. And because of that, the drama comes to a head that much quicker too...

Well, enough about that. Let's answer some reviews!

 **SilverWriter0927:** Thanks! I'm glad you enjoyed Gwen and Trent finally hooking up (although I do have to ask that you not squeal like that so much, my monitor doesn't have the best resolution so large 'words' tend to make reading reviews a little more annoying as I have to scroll).

 **acosta perez jose ramiro:** Thank you, as always. Mutant Izzy wasn't something I was always sure I was going to do, but I'm glad I went with it.

 **graveexcitement:** Mmm. And yeah, while Gwen had to go pre-merge, she did at least hook up with Trent, and she still had enough focus in this series, and more so in canon, that her elimination isn't particularly unjust in a meta sense. As for Noah, well, this season in general has just been me trying to have him actual live up to his alleged intellect that he never really uses much in canon for anything besides zingers. And even that's still tempered by his general laziness, causing his strategy to manifest as it has - he's still trying to stay under the general radar, but as you said he's not perfect at it. Jasmine caught on to him a little bit, but with the idol now out of play and Courtney's gaff, who knows what'll happen with Noah next...

 **Animation Adventures:** Thanks! I'm glad you liked the episode, especially with Izzy's mutation being what it is - Stitch wasn't really an inspiration for what I did with Izzy, at least not a conscious one, but I approve of the comparison. And I'm really happy that my decision to have two buried cameos has gone over so well with you and the other readers - not only was it a great source of humor, like you said, and it also allowed the twist ending to be set up. As for whether or not it's weird to have your favorite episode be one where your favorite character gets booted...I honestly have no idea, but I'm leaning towards no?

 **Tokusatsu-31st Century:** Yeah, Courtney really shot herself in the foot, metaphorically speaking. By trying to eliminate one of the biggest threats to her, she ended up ruining a friendship and her reputation. And you'll see soon enough how this affects Trent...

 **ashDanLand:** Haha, yeah, this season's been going fast and the twists and turns have had to be fast just keep up. So while Izzy's a great mutant, she had to leave quickly, and Gwen had to go unexpectedly as well. I'm not entirely sure what you mean by Noah being very bad, or Courtney being easy to manipulate in last week's chapter, but I do see why you weren't really able to read the end of last season.

 **Alice Queen of Madness:** Mmm, well, Gwen's elimination was meant to be shocking. And I'm glad you enjoyed Izzy's arms over a potential Izzy-zoid; as you said, the arms suit her more. And yeah, out of all the final six, Courtney probably has the worst position right now. Today's challenge is gonna be pretty important.

 **moka evans:** Well, it just wasn't time for Courtney to leave - plus, I figured that, as you said, she's the type to get jealous over a close female friend's boyfriend, and I wanted to play that up a bit even if I'm not sure Gwen and Courtney ended up being as close here as they ever were in canon. I do kind of wish that I'd kept the idol around longer as well, but I had kind of written myself into a corner since I was so set on Gwen leaving and there just wasn't any other way for that to happen last week. But this way, I got to set up a few things...and I will say that I do enjoy Gwen/Courtney as a ship as well. Other than that, I glad you enjoyed Noah's showdown and confessional, and I hope you enjoy the rest of the season!

 **Glowing Insanity:** Awesome, it's always nice to know when my chapters are so suspenseful. And yeah, I will admit that I have a tendency to not let returning players last very long, especially recently. But hey, at least Izzy made things interesting while she lasted. And yeah, I'm glad the elimination was as tense as I was hoping - well, Gwen's anyway, but that was deliberate on my part. Gwen at least managed to finally get together with Trent, and Courtney...well, she has a rough road ahead of her.

 **The Prime Writer:** Ah, no problem, no problem, review as and when you can, as always. Like you said, Justin, though villainous under the right circumstances, just doesn't have what it takes to really last long in that role. Or any role, to be honest. At least he had an enjoyable exit, even without going bald. Lindsay, of course, is someone I'm super proud of; despite by initial worries that she's best suited to slow-burn development I was still able to show enough of her different aspects before she had to leave the game. Noah, in contrast, has been able to diverge from his canon self in that without the fettering of a friend like Owen he's been able to really show off his craftiness and intellect, much more so than he ever really was able to in canon - though he's still not especially proactive. Courtney...well, she has her own share of problems in-story right now, suffice to say. Though her temper is always lurking beneath the surface, she needs a good deal of frustration to truly explode on people. As for Cameron, I can only say what's already been said: out of all the cast, he remains the one I'm most disappointed that I haven't really been able to do much with. And Izzy...well, she's always going to be energetic and enjoyable self, though I will admit I'm uncertain what the future holds for her. And yeah, I certainly hope that I do better with All-Stars than Fresh did - like you, I did enjoy some parts of it, but the bad way outweighed the good, especially with Mike's entire character arc.

 **Sarcasm Is A Habit:** Thanks! Honestly, I figured it would be too easy to just get rid of Courtney last week - she still has so much potential this season. Not to say that Gwen didn't...but ultimately, Gwen's just wasn't what I wanted or needed. Like I told Animation Adventures, Stitch wasn't really an inspiration for what I did with Izzy, but I like the comparison. I hope you enjoy the merge chapter!

 **bruno14:** Yup, pretty much everyone has to go at some point. And yeah, Izzy's now able to grow extra arms for herself...there's a lot of potential in that concept, I think. And Courtney did certainly dig her own tomb, although usually couples are worth breaking up in reality show competitions - it's just that in this case, the couple was pretty popular with the rest of the cast. I am glad you enjoyed Topher's cameo, and I'm sorry he (and his rivalry with Sierra) weren't featured more in the past as a finale between them would actually be fairly interesting.

 **CVluvFoxy:** Yup. I'm afraid it was Gwen's time to leave, not Courtney's - she still has things left to do, especially with the cast pretty much against her right now. And yeah, the Rats have definitely been the more interesting team lately...but hopefully that'll change now that the teams are merging this week. It's safe to say that I'm going to make things as interesting and exciting as I can from here on out.

 **PizzaTheBomb:** Fair enough on the Gwent criticism. And I'm glad you're happy that Noah got to stay, and with Sierra and Topher's underground argument. I'm actually also glad you found Izzy's mutation to be creepy and weird, as that is sort of something I was going for - but in a sense, things like that suit Izzy's character and role. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this week's episode!

 **Guest:** Haha, yeah, that's Izzy for you - always good for what the writer needs. Usually, anyway. And yeah, this week's elimination is special in that whoever wins the challenge gets to decide who goes home. Interesting predictions as always, both for this week's elimination and next season's cast, but you'll just have to wait and see who I end up choosing.

 **OMAC001:** Thanks! And you'll just have to read on to see if you're right...

 **P. T. Piranha:** Ahaha, thanks! Honestly, I usually only spend part of three or four days each week working on a chapter, and a good part of that is just thinking things out- what I need from the story, what the characters would want to do for themselves, and so on. I'm really happy it all led to last week's elimination going so well. And yeah, Izzy's mutation reminds me of Nico Robin's ability as well, who is the character you're thinking of. Although Robin's power is rather stronger than Izzy's.

 **BuckJohnson:** Yeah, that's the biggest problem with the shift in episode number with the later seasons - so many great characters, so little time to show them off. Let's see...your reaction to Izzy is probably the most adequate I've ever seen. Gwen's elimination shocked basically everyone, and I'm happy you're enjoying Courtney. Not much else to say, other than that I hope you enjoy the rest of the season!

 **DSX62415:** Yup. Well, everyone that has to deal with her wherever she is, right now. Of course, she was a handful to begin with, and now she's at least six times that. And yeah, Courtney really messed up last week... Anyway, I'm glad you got a new keyboard, and I wish you luck with your writing.

 **FOWLKON:** True, the twist isn't new or unprecedented in canon, but All-Stars hasn't happened yet in the Shuffled series and I've never heard of I Love Money before now. And yeah, I'm really happy that everyone's enjoyed the double elimination and how it played out - it means that I was on the right track in terms of what each character would want to do, as well as in the balance and drama that I need going forward. And yeah, you did predict Izzy's mutation, although it was probably not the longest of shots. And yeah, with the merge this week things are gonna get...interesting, to say the least. I'm glad you enjoyed Noah's method of baiting a response from Topher and Sierra, and while it would have been amusing to have those two in the same chest (and I did consider it at points), ultimately the tie required they be separated.

 **Star Saber21:** Yeah, that little fight scene with Chef was the primary inspiration for Izzy's mutation, and what a mutation it ended up being. As I told Fowlkon I did consider putting Topher and Sierra in the same box, which would have certainly provided both danger and humor, but ultimately I decided to split them up for the tie. And you're right in that with the merge approaching, both Courtney and Noah's positions are going to have to tread carefully...

 **Charlie:** They'll be split, as there's no reason in-universe to consider them part of the same season.

 **I. M. Poik:** Yup, Izzy's a mutant alright. I don't know if I'll ever get to show off the full extent of her powers, but I do think she's limited to just arms - but can make far more than four extras. A mass of arms with Izzy's cackling head at the end...is a truly horrifying mental image. And yeah, aside from the return of the rivalry, last week's chapter certainly shook things up - at the very least because Courtney has a big target on her back now, and Noah's been seen in public acting strategically. You'll have to read on ti find out what becomes of any of it, though.

 **MALHATER45:** Well okay then. Trent being on his own has certainly been an interesting writing experience, and I will have to disagree with you on Izzy - while she's certainly different than Dakota in terms of mutation, that doesn't really make her better or worse in my eyes. Interesting prediction, and I look forward to seeing your reaction to the chapter should you choose to review again.

 **StayOuttaMyShed:** Hah, yeah, Izzy never really stood a chance...but Gwen did, in another world at least. I think early on I did consider eliminating one of them in this episode to mirror Zoke, but ultimately I decided I didn't want both of them in the Final Six, and thus with the potential of Trent on his own on the table Gwen had to be eliminated. And so Gwen got eliminated, Izzy had a role, Courtney had a big moment, and Noah got to be both scheming and a little over-confident. And now I'm left with what appears to be a popular Final Six, and with several directions I can take them. Especially with the rules of this week's challenge, as you said. I look forward to seeing your reactions to this week's episode.

 **totaldramacodyfan20:** No problem. And yeah, it doesn't certainly seem like Gwen and Courtney's situation is reversed, in a sense... I'm glad you enjoyed Gwent ending on a high note, and I enjoyed your predictions of what's to come. I look forward to seeing how they may change over the next few weeks.

 **link9753:** Really? Great to see you loved it so much! Though, as always, I do hope I'll be able to outdo myself at some point. I think most people were expecting Noah to find and play the idol, but certainly nobody expected Gwen to be the victim of it - even in-story. And with the unusual elimination rules this week, things are definitely going to get even more interesting...it was fun to get it to go the way that I wanted to, and I hope my enjoyment passes on to the readers.

 **wifishark:** Yeah, while I did briefly consider putting the double some time post-merge, I figured it would be better to just do it last week instead and keep things simple. Same thing with Izzy, really; she filled the role the season needed, and I feel no shame in booting her right after she returned to the in booting Gwen before the merge, to be honest.

 **Explorer of the Unknown:** Haha, I'm always happy to see my readers surprised in a good way. I'm glad you enjoyed Izzy's mutation, like you said it matches her personality well and even if she hasn't really learned to dial herself back at least she has a new friend in Staci. As for Courtney, yeah she absolutely messed up last week and is gonna have to deal with the fallout from hurting Trent like that. I'm glad I decided to have him last longer, it'll really allow me to explore a different side of him that I wasn't able to with Gwen around. Noah...well, he still has cover in the form of Courtney, at least, and no longer has the immunity statue for people to worry about either. I'm glad you enjoyed last week's cameo, as did so many others, and as for this week's...well, whoever it is will only have like a couple hours to work with, should they do something. Thank for the review as always, and I hope you enjoy the rest of the season!

 **CDreadsFanfic:** That so? Huh, most people were expecting her to leave last week, like she did. But hey, nothing wrong with expecting her to go farther. At least you had her mutation to enjoy, though. I'm glad you enjoyed Gwen leaving, both in the sense that you'd predicted something like it and because of everything that allowed it to happen, that immediately happened because of it - and, I hope, everything that will happen now because of as for your All-Stars predictions...well, they're interesting, although you seem to have listed 6 Heroes and 8 Villains, rather than 7 of each.

And that's that for the reviews! Now for the usual announcements: the **_poll in my profile will remain up for the time being,_** and as always **_a TVTropes page for this series exists_** , and as per usual with such things, could always use more work. I thoroughly appreciate those who've already been working on it, and look forward to seeing what you all add next.

The current players are as follows:

Toxic Rats:Courtney, Noah, Trent

Mutant Maggots: Jasmine, Zoey, Harold

However, the merge is this week so don't expect those teams to stay for much longer. I hope you enjoy what's coming, dear readers!

\- Fangren

* * *

 **Episode 9 – Grand Chef Auto**

"Last time, on Total Drama Revenge of the Island!" Chris opened over the usual stock shot of the island. "Our players went on a hunt for buried treasure," the first clip of the recap montage showed the Rats reaching the edge of the swamp, while the second showed the two teams digging their holes, "aka, _Topher_ and _Sierra_." The wannabe host was shown waking up to find himself trapped in a chest, then arguing with his long-time rival over a walkie-talkie.

"Gwen and Trent continued to bond," the host added over shots of the two enjoying each other's company, "both with each other _and_ with their teammates." Trent was shown talking to Noah, Gwen was shown talking to Courtney, and then Trent and Gwen pulled Courtney into the safety of a tree before a giant mutant alligator could pounce on her. "Izzy revealed she was even _more_ of a freak of nature than we realized," Chris continued over a medley of clips of the wild child showing off and making use of her extra arms, "thanks to her recent stay in the toxic wilds. But in the end, the challenge was a _tie_ ," Topher and Sierra were shown emerging from their coffins simultaneously, "meaning both teams had to send a member of the _other_ team home."

"For the Rats the choice was obvious, and _Izzy_ was given the boot," Chris said as Chef was shown capturing the shocked redhead before the votes were even read. "But the Maggots were shocked when Noah used the invincibility statue," the schemer was shown reluctantly playing the Chris head, "saving himself and sending _Gwen_ home instead," nearly everyone gasped in surprise as the announcement was shown being made, "courtesy of _Izzy_ , who got the idea from _Courtney_." Izzy shrugged calmly, and Courtney tried to stammer out an explanation as several angry pairs of eyes moved to her. "Adios to both of you!" Chris added in annoyance over a clip of the two losers getting Hurled by the dripping wet host.

"Who will be the next Hurl?" Chris asked, the scene moving to the docks as the montage finally ended. "And _how_ will we injure them beforehand?" He stepped closer to the camera, shielding the right side of his sly-smiling face with his left hand before stepping back. "Find out the answers to these questions and more, right now, right here, on Total! Drama! Revenge, of the Island!"

xxx

(Fade to Opening Theme)

 _Dear Mom and Dad, I'm doin' fine;_

 _You guys are on my mind!_

 _Ya asked me what I wanted to be,_

 _And now I think the answer is plain to see!_

 _I wanna be...famous!_

 _I wanna live close to the sun!_

 _Well pack your bags, 'cause I've already won!_

 _Everythin' to prove, nothin' in my way;_

 _I'll get there one day._

 _'Cause I wanna be...famous!_

 _(Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

 _I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

 _I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

(Fade to Episode)

xxx

A harp was playing as the episode opened, and a small pink bird sang happily on a tree branch...until a thick purple tentacle rose up and flicked it away. The music turned significantly less peaceful as an air raid siren began to sound, the camera zooming out to show the squid-tree looking around in alarm.

The shot cut over to Chris on the roof of the Maggots' cabin, wearing an old war helmet and cranking the siren with a smile. The shot pulled back to show the six campers stepping out into the common area to investigate – Noah, Trent, and Courtney from the Rats' cabin; Harold and Zoey from the Maggots', and Jasmine from between.

"Gooooooood morning, campers!" the host greeted, allowing the siren's wail to peter off. "Today we have a _very_ special treat."

"Actual _food_?" Noah asked dryly.

"Espressos?" Zoey added with an excited gasp.

"Kung fu lessons?" Harold finished eagerly.

"Nope! It's _merge_ day!" Chris told them. "No more Team Rat, no more Team Maggot!" He jumped off the roof, and landed with a grunt. "From now on," he said as he walked over to the former Toxic Rats, "it's every man, woman, and _mutant_ for themselves." Noah raised an eyebrow and smirked, while Trent and Courtney locked eyes and the musician's dark grin quickly unnerved the former CIT.

xxx

"The merge? _Finally_ ," Courtney told the outhouse camera. "Now that I don't have a _team_ to hold me back, I can really start _winning_." Worry suddenly filled her face, and she looked away to her right. "Sure, the others are pretty mad at me for what happened to Gwen, but I don't _need_ their approval. I'm strong enough on my own. And if they know what's best for them, they'll ally with me _anyway_ ," she finished, putting her hands on her hips and closing her eyes and looking generally haughty and self-assured.

xxx

The music became tense as the footage cut back to the steps of the former Rats' cabin, the host taking out a walkie talkie. "Chef!" he called into it, the scene cutting to a close-up the hulking man in the pilot's seat of what sound like a helicopter. "Drop it like it's hot!" the host ordered, prompting Chef to grin and press a button on the control stick.

The shot cut outward a ways to reveal that the helicopter was carrying a truly gigantic block of concrete, which was promptly dropped. Down below, Harold and Zoey screamed and ran away from their former home, and the three former Rats cringed and threw up their arms to shield themselves from the shower of splintered wood sent their way by the impact.

"You _crushed_ our cabin with a block of solid concrete?!" Zoey yelled angrily back at Chris, the shot cutting back to show her, Harold, and Jasmine lying on the ground in front of their ruined cabin and concrete block.

"I had a bunch left over from building a _monument_ to myself," Chris explained with a cheeky smile. "I call it, 'Mount Chrismore'!" A short drumroll led into a grandiose theme matching the equally grandiose tone the host used to name his monument, and the camera cut over to, and slowly zoomed in towards, a massive fake mountain in the shape of Chris' head.

A small squeak of a fart ended the music as a bit of bird poop landed on the edge of Mount Chrismore's left eye. The shot panned up to the culprits: a pair of rattle-gulls squawking with laughter on top the concrete head, high-winging each other with congratulatory glee.

"From now on," Chris told the cast now standing by the lone remaining building in shot, unaware of his project's defilement, "you'll all share one tiny, cruddy, cabin."

"But all our _stuff_ was in there!" Zoey protested.

"Yes," the host replied mirthfully, "and because I am nice, and not heartless, I'll help you get it out." Zoey and Harold smiled hopefully, and with another grand tune the shot cut to a close-up of a pickaxe. "One McLean brand Pickaxe," Chris said as the pickaxe head gleamed, and the camera pulled back to show that the tool was about the size of a pencil. " _Children's_ size." He flicked it over to the campers as the helicopter approached, and based on the gravelly cry of pain that followed it had hit Harold. Sure enough, the shot cut to Zoey holding the miniscule tool while the dweeb rubbed his sore right arm.

"Later, taters!" Chris told them, grabbing on to the helicopter's hanging rope ladder and laughing as he was lifted up and flown off. The helicopter was flying low enough, however, that he ended up slamming into the top of the block of concrete he'd had dropped, and yelped in pain. "Chef!" he yelled angrily as the helicopter flew off with him.

/

"Hah," Courtney said as she and Noah watched from the sidelines the Maggots try and reclaim their belongings off-screen. "Good thing that wasn't _our_ cabin. Now _we_ don't have to waste time and energy digging through rubble."

"Yeah, speak for yourself," Noah replied, walking forward and leaving his former teammate to gasp in shock, then scowl.

xxx

"First she gets Gwen voted off, and now she's rubbing the others' faces in their wrecked cabin?" Noah told the confessional camera. "Yeah, I was gonna let her rage get the better of her _before_ , but now it's time this Rat got off her sinking ship altogether. If the others think I'm still on good terms with her, it's just gonna give me more trouble than I _need_."

xxx

The scene moved to the broken roof of the destroyed cabin, where Zoey was fruitlessly trying to break through the shingles with the pathetically small pickaxe she'd been given. "Aww, c'mon," she moaned after a few grunting swings, sitting back on her legs, "gimme my clothes back!"

"Maybe you'd have better luck in _another_ part of the rubble," Jasmine suggested, the shot pulling out to show her standing nearby...and that the section of roof Zoey had been trying to break through was propped up against the concrete block with nothing but air below it.

"Oh...," Zoey said, looking down with a faint blush of embarrassment. "Heh, yeah, good idea." She slid down off the roof next to her friend and former teammate, who was now looking around.

"Hey, where's Trent?" Jasmine asked. "I thought he was gonna help us out."

"Oh, I think he's over there," Zoey said, pointing forward. The camera quick-panned over to the other side of the rubble, where Trent was standing on the remains of the lower part of the roof. Though he was prying a part of the wall away from the concrete block with his hands, he was looking backward with a scowl on his face.

"Stupid _Courtney_...," he muttered angrily. "I can't believe she got Gwen voted off...I'll show _her_..."

The focus moved back to Zoey and Jasmine. "Uhh, does he seem a little...I don't know, _madder_ than usual?" Zoey asked.

"Yeah," Jasmine said, "but it's just because his girl got eliminated. I'm sure he'll get over it soon, especially once Courtney's gone."

"I guess...," Zoey said uncertainly.

"Look, don't worry about him," the survivalist said, leading the indie girl over to what had once been the side railing of their cabin. "Just focus on what's ahead of us, okay?"

xxx

"Don't get me wrong, I feel bad for the guy," Jasmine confessed, "but there's not much we can do for him besides make sure Courtney gets voted out. Aside from that, I don't see any reason why I can't try to enjoy the rest of the competition."

xxx

The static cut away to Noah and Harold pulling a blanket out from under the ruined steps. "Thanks again for helping, Noah," the alpha geek said.

"Hey, it was either this or listen to Courtney say how much _better_ than everyone she is," Noah replied as they gave the blanket one final tug, freeing it entirely. "I'm pretty sure she thinks that if she keeps saying it, it'll become true."

A snort drew their attention upwards, the camera pulling back to show Trent jumping down off the low section of the former roof. "Yeah, as if. Does she even realize how _mad_ everyone is at her? Uggh, and to think I was gonna try and be _cool_ with her," he said, pounding his hand in frustration.

"I know how you feel, man," Noah said. "Me and Gruesome were tight since day one. It's just not the same without her around to darken up the day."

"Thanks," Trent said, "but I'm not sure you really _do_ know how I feel." Noah raised a skeptical eyebrow, but it went unnoticed as the musician closed his eyes and drew a fist close to his chest, an emotional guitar tune welling up in the background. "What me and Gwen had went way beyond just friendship. She was my _muse_ , the shining light that made being out here so much more worthwhile. We were in _love_ , man."

Harold gave him a few consoling pats on the shoulder. "There, there," he said. "Although Gwen may be gone, know that the bonds of _fraternity_ are ever by your side."

"Thanks, man," Trent said. "Now we just gotta be careful so nothing ruins our chances of avenging Gwen." He took out his lucky rabbit's foot, and began to tap it against his heart muttering "One-two-three-four-five-six-seven-eight- _nine_."

Noah and Harold looked at each other, and shrugged.

xxx

"I'm guessing Trent's gonna be focused a lot more on his lucky number now that Gwen is gone," Harold told the outhouse camera, rubbing his chin in thought. "Losing a girl can be really hard on a guy, even if she only got hurled away by a catapult instead of breaking up with him. Luckily, I still have Jasmine around, otherwise I'd probably be a wreck myself," he smiled and nodded knowingly.

xxx

"Challenge tii~iime!" Chris announced as the scene moved to the space between the communal bathrooms and the mess hall, where the six campers had gathered before the host and a widescreen television cart. "Today, it's all about grabbin' 'em and taggin' 'em," Chris explained as the camera panned across Trent, Noah, Harold, Zoey, Jasmine, and Courtney. "And to show you how it's done, I give you Total Drama's favorite evil-doer on loan once more from Area 51, _Scarlett_."

The music trilled darkly as the evil genius, still strapped to a hand truck with a mask covering the lower half of her face, was wheeled over by Chef. "Scarlett still owes me for all the rampages she's done," Chris explained, "so, I saved an _extra-painful_ challenge demo just for her."

"You're going to _pay_ for this, McLean," Scarlett warned.

"No, _you_ are," Chris corrected with a grin. "First up, the 'Smash and Grab'." The shot cut over to the television as it switched from static to a feed of the kitchen. "Hidden somewhere in the mess hall kitchen are six keys to Chef's prized collection of vintage go-karts." The feed cut to the karts in question, sitting outdoors in an area walled off by wooden planks. A single chain link gate served as an entrance point, with a barbed wire-lined sign displaying an image of a go-kart above it. Another pile of the island's ever-present toxic waste barrels could be seen just beyond the wall.

"Some drive like well-oiled machines," the host continued as a kart was shown in close-up against a brilliant orange background, its engine whirring and its wheels spinning. "Others...," the go-kart's wheels suddenly broke off, "...not so much."

"Chris!" Chef interrupted angrily, moving the scene back to them and Scarlett. "Don't let these clowns drive my karts! They're gonna smash 'em!"

"Yes," the host answered in a condescending manner, "and _car crashes_ equals _ratings_. Demo time, Scarlett! Chef," the hulking man reluctantly stepped towards the hand truck, "let this perp out on a day pass."

Chef untied the evil genius' bonds, and the moment they fell away she discard her mask and ran off with a cry of "So _long_ , you impudent peons!" She started cackling evilly, and the two adults shared an awkward look.

"O _kayyyy_...probably shoulda seen _that_ coming...," Chris admitted. Chef nodded.

Courtney sniffed in an unimpressed manner as the camera cut over to her and Jasmine. "Searching a kitchen? Go-kart racing? _Please_. I can do all of that in my _sleep_."

"Oh yeah?" Jasmine looked down at her with a smirk. "You think you'll just beat us all without a fuss, then?"

" _Duh_ ," Courtney replied with a hint of irritation. "It's not like I'm some overblown _loser_ with a giant ego. I know what I'm capable of doing."

"Then I guess this challenge is gonna be a nail-biter, 'cause I'm not givin' up either," Jasmine said, still smirking.

The camera panned over to show Zoey listening in with an anxious look on her face. She tapped her friend on the arm, prompting the taller girl to stoop down a little bit so Zoey could whisper into her ear. "Are you sure you should be acting so... _chummy_ with her?" she asked. "I don't think Trent likes it." She pointed down to the other end of the line, where the musician was shown glaring towards the girls.

"It's just a bit of competitiveness," Jasmine replied, "it's not like me and Courtney are suddenly _friends_ or anything. Trent understands that."

"If you say so..." Zoey said uncertainly.

xxx

"Jasmine's usually right about people," Zoey told the confessional camera, "but I can't help but feel worried that this time she's _wrong_. Maybe I should find a way to make Trent feel better before something _bad_ happens."

xxx

Chris was now standing on the mess hall's front porch, just to the side of the stairs, while the campers were lined up on the ground nearby. "Players!" the host said, raising his hand and prompting the six to get into running positions. "Commence smashing and/or grabbing...now!" He waved his hand down, and the footage flashed ahead.

/

"A key, a key...," Trent told himself as he dashed over to a shelf near the walk-in freezer, the music slow and plodding. "Where would Chris hide a key?" He lifted the lid of a jar only to find it empty, then checked a salt shaker by turning it over. The lid fell off, dumping a pile of salt onto the shelf, and Trent gasped. "Aww man, that's some seriously bad luck," he said, quickly throwing a pinch of salt over his right shoulder. The camera followed it as it hit an unsuspecting Noah in the eye as he casually looked in Trent's direction; he grunted in pain then glared at the musician while rubbing his eye.

"Sorry, man," Trent said bashfully, rubbing the back of his head.

The focus moved over to Harold and Jasmine as they approached a tall cabinet. "Alright. I'll search high, you look low," the survivalist said.

"But of course," Harold said, bending down and opening one of the bottom cupboards. He looked around a little, then frowned and stood up. "No keys that I could see."

"Yeah, me neither," Jasmine said. "But it's only a matter of time before something jumps out at us."

She closed the cupboard door, revealing that a giant cockroach was now standing on her arm. "That's not what I meant," she said nervously before the mutant launched itself onto Harold's face, the dweeb immediately screaming and flailing his arms.

"Uggh...," Noah grunted as the camera moved back to him and his reddened right eye, bending down and reaching under the room's central table. "Maybe they hid something under _here_...," he said before pulling out a bag with a peanut on the side. He stared at it for a moment, then shrugged. "Ehh, probably no more disgusting than anything _else_ I've eaten here," he said before ducking under the cloth head-first.

The camera cut under the cloth with him, showing him now face to face with another giant roach, this one sitting on top a pile of grubby pots and discarded soda cans. "Oh fate, why must you hate me so?" Noah moaned as the roach licked its mandibles, dashed a bit of salt on the boy's face, then opened wide...

The shot cut back outside the tablecloth as a flat note played and Noah yelped in pain.

Just to the right of the sink, Trent was searching through some more shelves as Zoey walked up to him. "One...five... _eight_...," he muttered as he looked from one box or bag or bottle to the next.

"Uh, Trent? Are you alright?" Zoey asked in concern.

"Huh?" the musician said, setting down a small pan and turning around to face her. "Oh, yeah, no problem here. Just counting to see if there's _nine_ of anything. I figure it might lead me to a key."

"Rrrright...," Zoey said, briefly looking away with a hint of anxiousness. "Umm, and what about Courtney?" Trent stiffened slightly. "Is there...anything about her you'd like to talk about?"

"What's there to say?" Trent frowned as he turned back and started searching the shelves again. "She needs to go."

"Well, there shouldn't be a problem there," Zoey said happily. "I mean, as long as she doesn't win the challenge we can just vote her off, right?"

Trent frantically whirled back around at her. "Don't _jinx_ it!" he hissed with a hint of desperation that made Zoey wince.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to," the indie girl said.

Trent let out his breath, then turned towards a door next to the sink. "I know," he said, "you just can't be too careful with luck. Who _knows_ what could happen?"

As he opened the door, the camera cut inside to reveal it as a broom closet. As soon as he looked inside, however, yet another giant roach jumped out and latched onto his face, knocking him over with a grunt. "Ooh, _sorry_ ," Zoey winced, leaning over and looking down at the fallen young man.

The focus moved to Courtney next as she crouched down in front of a bucket of water on the other side of the sink. "Well, I might as well check this too," she said, reaching in but almost immediately yelping in pain and pulling her arm back out. A thin, insectile arm rose out of the water and grasped at her as she rubbed her hand. "You better watch it, buster," she scolded the bucket, drawing her arm back and punching into the water.

Her grin quickly faded into a grimace of pain again as whatever lurked inside the bucket bit her. She screamed and tried to withdraw her hand again, but it was stuck and all she managed was to slop some water onto the floor.

The camera panned back over to Trent and Zoey, the latter of which was looking in the direction of Courtney's screams while the former tossed the roach that had attacked him back into the broom closet and slammed the door. "Do you think we should maybe help her?" Zoey asked.

"Not really," Trent answered coolly. "Maybe if she actually _apologized_ for getting Gwen eliminated and trying to do the same to me I'd give her a hand." He walked off to the right as he spoke, and returned shortly carrying a stained and fly-ridden bag of garbage. "But until then, I'd rather just search through this _garbage_."

He opened the bag, and both he and Zoey immediately wretched. The musician quickly covered his mouth and nose with his sleeve and reached in with his free hand, and the camera focused in on the indie girl as she suddenly became thoughtful.

xxx

"Maybe if I can get _Courtney_ to apologize to _Trent_ ," Zoey pondered in the outhouse, "then he'll go back to his old self and we can all be friends again. Well, friends- _ish_ anyway. It's...worth a try, right?" she asked the camera with an uncertain smile.

xxx

The scene moved back to Jasmine and Harold, the dweeb flailing his arms and running around with a mutant cockroach latched to his face while the survivalist hesitantly looked on. Eventually she gave a helpless shrug, then held out her fist so that Harold ran into it face-first; he fell onto his back, and the roach rolled off him with a pained hiss to accompany the dweeb's pained groan.

"Sorry, mate," Jasmine said, pulling him back to his feet with one hand, "I didn't have many options with you running around like a panicked joey."

"I understand," Harold nodded solemnly. "I was just too _agile_ to grab hold of, like an oiled-up gazelle."

"Right," Jasmine said with a joking smirk. "Now let's just see if...," she trailed off as she stepped back over to the cabinet they'd been searching, and felt around on top it with her long arm. After a second she smiled. "Got one!" she declared, pulling her arm back and holding up a key. She looked at Harold's grin, then tossed the key to him. "You take it," she told him with a smirk.

"It is my _honor_ ," Harold replied slowly, holding the key up to his wide, sparkling eyes as though it were priceless treasure.

xxx

"What? It was the least I could do after the roach thing," Jasmine told the confessional camera. "And besides, he would've done the same for me. Plus, it's not like we can't just find another key together."

xxx

"Alright, cough it up!" Courtney yelled at the bucket as she thrust a mop into it over and over. She relented after a second, withdrawing the mop so that a rather battered mutant cockroach could emerge and weakly spit up a key into her waiting hands. " _Yes_!" she said, excitedly pumping her fist.

The focus moved back to Harold and Jasmine as the alpha nerd rooted around in a garbage can while Jasmine watched. After a second he smiled and pulled his now-grimy arm out with a smile and dropped a key into his friend's hands. "For you, milady," he told her.

"Thanks," Jasmine snorted.

Another cut took the scene back to the central table, which rocked and shook before, finally, Noah was tossed back out into the open looking rather the worse for wear. "Hah!" he shot back at the table as a sharp-toned taunt. "No meal for you, and _I_ got what I wanted!" He grinned, and held up a key of his own.

"C'mon...," Trent muttered as the shot cut back to him rooting through the garbage bag, "I know you're in here somewhere... _yes_!" He exclaimed brightly, and laughed as he pulled a key out. "Haha, check it out, I finally _found_ one!" he told Zoey, the camera panning over to show her searching through the same shelves Trent himself had been looking through earlier.

"Whoa, it's _gold_!" the indie girl said in awe as the shot zoomed in on Trent's key, a radiant background appearing to emphasize its color.

"I know. It _has_ to be a good sign," Trent said excitedly.

"I hope so," Zoey smiled, picking up the lid of a large cookie jar and sticking her hand in it. A second later she smiled and withdrew a key of her own, and beamed at Trent. "Look, I found one too! Although it isn't gold...," she added with a frown.

"Guess my key really is unique," Trent said, looking at his gold key and grinning as the plodding music that had played throughout the search finally peaked and ended.

/

The scene flashed outside, where Chris and Chef were walking away from the mess hall. "You let them trash my _kitchen_?!" Chef asked the host in disbelief, both men stopping in their tracks. "Chris, man. Do you know how _long_ that's gonna take to clean up?"

"Buudddyyy," the host replied, his tone more condescending than placating, "brother from another mother! Relax, it's cool. See?" he ran over and thrust a mop into his hulking assistant's arms. "I got you a new mop!"

As he walked away the shot lingered on Chef, the music booming darkly as he growled and snapped the mop.

/

Another flash took the scene outside the patchwork wall of Chef's go-kart pen, a flashing red neon light in the shape of the man's head affixed to the board above the chainlink entrance. "Say hello to challenge part deux!" Chris said over the zooming shot before the camera cut to him and the six campers just inside the compound, a light but tense score beginning in the background. Each contestant was holding some kind of yellow electronic tablet, as well as a can of spray pain – Courtney with red, Noah with black, Trent with green, Zoey with pink, Jasmine with purple, and Harold with blue.

"Grand _Chef_ Auto!" the host continued. "You've each been given a can of spray pain and a GPS map of the island. Your _mission_?" he said with a sly look as the shot cut to a rather unimpressed-looking Courtney. "Race your go-karts around the island and be the first to graffiti tag three landmarks," the host explained as the shot cut to a close-up of Courtney's GPS, showing a topographic map with three blinking lights arranged in a wide triangle.

"The rock wall of Mount Looming Tragedy," Chris said, a deep drumroll leading in to a shot of the looming tragedy they'd been forced to scale several episodes ago. "The spooky tree in the haunted forest," the squid-tree was shown next, its eyeball and tentacles tucked away out of sight. "And, the tippy-top of a giant totem pole," the host finished as the camera panned up the camp's slightly goofy-looking totem pole.

"Oh, and the go-karts?" Chris added as the shot cut over to Chef standing in front of the go-karts and looking around irritably. "You'll have to steal them. From _Chef_." The camera suddenly zoomed in on the hulking man, who growled as an ominous riff played.

Harold gulped.

"The first player to completely tag all three landmarks wins immunity," Chris explained. " _And_ ," the shot began to zoom across the variously stubborn, determined, and nervous faces of the campers, "they get to choose who will be eliminated. Haha, alright," he said jovially as the camera reached the end of the line and cut back to him. "Aaaand, _go_!"

/

The scene flashed to a close-up of Chef as he looked from side to side, a dangerous ascending chant ending in a sharp drum beat as the perspective moved behind his shoulders to show the six campers standing their ground.

"Oh yeah, I'm _so scared_ of some _staring_ ," Courtney said, rolling her eyes in sarcastic mockery. "Step aside, old man," she added with a harshness that caused Noah to warily take a step away from her. As he did so a deep, blaring tuba opened a darker dramatic score, the camera cutting back to Chef's close-up as he narrowed his eyes.

" _Nobody_ touches my stuff," he said softly. The shot cut to his mouth alone, as he repeated " _Nobody_."

With a snap of his fingers the music picked up its pace, and with an angry chittering a veritable army of hairless mutant squirrels rose up from behind, within, and in front of the go-karts. Zoey gasped, as did Courtney, and Harold clutched the sides of his head, thrust a finger forward, and dramatically exclaimed " _Laser squirrels_!"

The eyes of three squirrels sitting on a single kart turned red and fired off their trademark eye lasers, and swept their gazes across the yard at the unseen, but screaming, campers.

The dramatic music fell away suddenly as the shot cut to Chris McLean, lounging in a yard chair with his feet propped up on a stack of tires. "I love it when Chef gets mad, don't you?" he asked the camera with a smile as the campers continued to scream. " _Who_ will survive his wrath?" he added as the dramatic score returned. "Find out after the break, right here, on Total! Drama! Revenge of the Island!"

(Fade to Commercial and Back)

The campers were still running and screaming under fire from the pack of laser squirrels as the episode resumed, the dramatic score resuming with it. Jasmine and Harold soon found themselves running into a corner between the wall and a stack of tires, and Chef Hatchet quickly came up behind them with a gleeful cackle. "Game over," he told them. "You're comin' with _me_."

Elsewhere, the rodent horde decided to abandon the safety of the go-karts to bring the assault to the humans.

"No! They're in my hair!" Zoey exclaimed as she tried to pull a squirrel off each of her braids.

"Aww, crud," Trent said, stopping in place upon hearing his friend's cry.

" _Hah_!" Courtney laughed as she ran up. "Why don't you go help her? It'll give _me_ more time to grab my go-kart." She laughed again and ran off, leaving Trent to grit his teeth angrily, then run after her. As he did he passed by Noah, who was struggling with a squirrel biting each arm and leg.

"Oww...would you just get _off_ already?" he yelled in irritation as he hopped forward on one foot, flailing his arms fruitlessly. "Here, you can have _these_!" he added, reaching into the pocket of his shorts and producing the bag of peanuts he'd found in the kitchen earlier.

Immediately, an angelic tune took over the music as a radiant background appeared behind the peanuts and the eyes of every squirrel turned to them – even the ones still gnawing on Zoey's head. "Happy? Now go _fetch_!" Noah told them, throwing the bag away as far as he could.

It hit Harold in the head as he and Jasmine were forcibly escorted forward by Chef. "Huh?" the dweeb said in confusion as he caught the bag on the rebound, and the three looked behind them and gasped. "Run away!" he yelled, Jasmine and Chef joining him as they ran off, pursued by the naked swarm as the dramatic music came back again.

"Alright, time to _blow_ this nuthouse," Noah said, hopping into a kart as the shot cut back to him. He turned the key, revved the engine, and took off with an unexpected burst of speed. The camera followed him a little ways, but lingered on Trent as he watched the slacker speed past from the seat of a golden go-kart.

"Man, I better hurry up," he said, taking the gold key out of his shirt. "Good thing I got this," he said, putting it into the ignition with a smile. "This has _gotta_ be the best one." He pressed down on the gas and the wheels began to spin and squeal, but for some reason he wasn't going anywhere. He frowned in confusion, then palmed his face as the shot zoomed out to reveal that his kart was missing its front wheels, the bare axles propped up on cinder blocks. "Or the _crummiest_ ," he berated himself. "How could I have been so _stupid_?"

"Who knows," Chris answered, leaning in with an impish smile as Zoey also arrived. "And before you ask," he quickly told the two, "no take-backs on the karts. _Especially_ the crummy ones." He leaned away, and the camera focused in on the musician and the indie girl.

"Maybe...I could give you a tow?" Zoey offered before Courtney zoomed by in a kart of her own, laughing triumphantly.

"Nah, don't bother," Trent said, his face falling into a modest glare in the direction Courtney had gone off in. "You should focus on beating Courtney. I'll make do _some_ how."

Zoey bit her lip nervously, looking between Trent and the direction he was looking. "Well, if you say so," she said, hopping into one of the other karts and speeding off.

The camera lingered on Trent, however, as he got out of the golden kart and looked around warily. "Okay, there's gotta be some spare wheels around here _somewhere_ ," he said.

/

The challenge music faded into a slower, plodding tune as the scene cut to Jasmine and Harold behind the iron-barred door of what looked like a wooden shed. Chef was standing outside, looking at his captives with a proud smile and crossed arms.

"You can't do this!" Jasmine told him.

"Yeah, this is totally bogus!" Harold chimed in.

"Tell it to yo' _prison guard_ ," Chef told them, the music spiking dramatically again as he gestured over his shoulder at Fang, who was chained to a thin stump sticking out of the mud. He growled viciously at them from the end of his leash, causing Harold and Jasmine to gasp and Chef to walk away cackling.

/

The shot cut to a close-up of the GPS map, a red icon bearing Noah's face now next to one of the flashing lights.

"Okay, first landmark and first to arrive," Noah said with a smirk as he shook his can of black paint. "Looks like things are looking up for me today," he chuckled as he tagged the rock with a simple X. The camera zoomed out as he turned and ran back to the left, calling out a quick "See you at the finish line, Courtney!" as he passed the young woman by.

"As _if_ ," the ex-CIT grunted, already shaking her can of red paint. "Hmm...," she murmured, tapping her chin in thought as she paused in front of the wall. "It should be something _simple_ , but still demonstrate my _domination_ of the others." The sound of an approaching engine got her attention, and she shot a brief glare off to the left. "No time...this'll have to do," she said to herself as she began to spray.

The shot cut to her parked go-kart as Zoey arrived next to it, got out, and ran up to the wall. "Hey, Courtney, I'm glad I caught you," she said while shaking her can of pink paint.

"Yeah, well, don't expect it to _last_ ," Courtney replied as she finished her tag – an elegant 'A+'. She turned to run back to her kart, causing Zoey to gasp and fruitlessly put out a hand to stop her.

"Wait," the indie girl said, "I wanted to ask you something!"

"Save it for _after_ the challenge!" Courtney shot back before hopping into her kart and speeding off.

Zoey huffed as she watched the girl drive past, then turned around and quickly tagged the rock wall with a pink heart shape. A short dramatic riff played, and the scene flashed away.

/

"Okay," Trent said, looking around warily while backing up across the yard with a pair of small tires in his arms. "No sign of Chef or those squirrels, so I should be good." He reached the golden go-kart and dropped the tires, then slotted one onto the front-right axle. "One-two-three-four-five-six-seven-eight- _nine_ ," he said, tightening the wheel with a socket wrench twist for each number. He stood up and gave a short, but fairly happy laugh.

/

A deep beat reintroduced a tense, trilling score as the scene cut to Fang, still growling at the end of his leash. The camera panned over to Jasmine and Harold, still trapped inside the improvised jail cell.

"Well this is quite the jam we've gotten ourselves into," Harold lamented. "I don't know how we're supposed to get out of _here_ , much less deal with _him_ ," he gestured to Fang, who growled and snapped his jaws at them, "get to our karts," he gestured in the opposite direction, the camera quick-panning to the remaining two go-karts, "and catch up with the others." The camera panned again, this time showing Trent speeding off in his golden kart.

"Well I'm pretty sure I can just bend the bars," Jasmine said, giving two of the bars a cursory tug, "and Fang's more bark than bite once you get used to him. But you're right that we're only gonna fall further behind the others if we don't act quickly."

"Hmm...," Harold said, tapping his chin in thought. "Maybe there's some kind of _shortcut_ we can use to get between the landmarks faster," he said, raising his GPS map and examining it more closely.

"Well, it can't hurt to look," Jasmine said as she began putting more effort into bending the bars.

/

"I can't believe it," Noah said giddily as he carefully walked back towards his kart, "two down and I'm _still_ in first!" The shot zoomed out to show a black X on the bark of the currently-dormant squid-tree, and Noah hopped into his kart and drove off just as Courtney and Zoey arrived.

"Uggh, not only am I still in _second_ ," Courtney griped as she ran to the tree with Zoey right behind her, "but now you've _actually_ caught up to me?"

"Look, I just wanted to ask you about what happened with _Gwen_!" the indie girl said as the tree's eye opened up and looked down at them.

"And I already _told_ everyone that I didn't want her to go!" Courtney snapped before turning her attention to the tree. Before she could start tagging, however, the music became tense again and a tentacle reached down and grabbed her around the waist, pulling her close and slamming her against the tree. Zoey gasped in concern, but seemed to be frozen in fear.

/

The scene cut back to the makeshift jail cell as Jasmine finally bent the bars open with a powerful grunt. "Yes!" Harold fist-pumped behind her.

"Let's get moving," Jasmine said, and the two ducked out through the gap.

They were immediately confronted by a snarling, snapping Fang, but Jasmine just gave him a quick punch on the nose, knocking him back a few feet. "Look, we don't have _time_ for you," she told him as he propped himself up on one arm and rubbed where he'd been hit. "And you can't do much tied up like that anyway, so don't bother." Fang looked over at the stump he was chained to, growled at it, then started to bite and gnaw at it.

He snapped through it in seconds, and turned a dark and cocky growl up towards...nothing, as the camera zoomed out to reveal that Jasmine and Harold were no longer present. Fang growled in frustration and pounded the ground, the dramatic music peaking.

"You sure showed him," Harold told Jasmine as the two hopped into their karts and sped away, the survivalist looking rather ungainly with her long legs sticking up around the wheel.

"Yeah," Jasmine smirked. "Now how about that shortcut?"

"Right," Harold said, looking down at his GPS, "I think I've just about figured it out. We just have to go _around_ the-" With his attention on the map his kart began to swerve, and the shot pulled back to show him bumping into Jasmine, cutting off his explanation.

"Whoa there!" the survivalist said as the two quickly steadied their karts. "Maybe you should just point it out as we go."

"Another great idea, oh beautiful and talented friend of mine," Harold said, earning a joking smile from Jasmine.

A sudden buzz from his GPS got his attention, though, and the camera moved over his shoulder to show the screen flickering as the player icons moved between the landmarks – Jasmine and Harold moving towards the first; Trent a little ways ahead of them; and the other three around the second. A small window popped up in the middle of the screen, showing what appeared to be a live feed of a rather odd-looking Chris McLean. "Listen- up-," he said in an oddly stilted voice. "Three- landmarks- wasn't- _tough_ \- _enough_ \- sooo- I- add-ed- a- _fourth_." Another blinking dot appeared on the map, the camera zooming out to show it roughly in the middle of the other three. "It's- a- doozy- a- mountainside- right- in- the- center- of- the- island." The grainy, flickering live feed reappeared, the shot zoomed in enough to show that 'Chris' looked suspiciously corpse-like, with grayed skin, closed eyes, and tongue lolling out of a drooping head. "Now- GET- tagging- and- don't- spare- the- _paint_. McLeeeeean, out."

The broadcast ended not as though its window had been closed, but as though a television had been turned off. The shot cut to a close-up of a tape recorder in the hand of Chef Hatchet, who rewound it and replayed the phrase "McLeeeeean, out." The shot pulled back, revealing Chef to be holding a beaten-up dummy of the host in front of a television camera.

" _Nobody_ touches my stuff," Chef told the camera filming him. " _NOBODY_!" he repeated as a dramatic riff played, and he descended into a mad cackle.

/

An ominous chant played as the scene flashed to Mount Looming Tragedy, where Trent had just finished his first tag – a green 9 on the rock to the right of the other three tags. The sound of engines got his attention, and he turned around just as Jasmine and Harold arrived.

"Whoa, you guys caught up already? I better get a move on," the musician said, dashing back down to his own kart as his friends disembarked with their paint cans.

"Nice shortcut, mate," Jasmine told Harold, who grinned proudly and ran into the side of the mount. Jasmine smiled at him, then tagged a simple purple O on the rock face.

/

The scene moved next to another rocky peak, a slope cut into the side and several pines dotted around the landscape. A sharp panting filled the air as the camera panned up to the large totem pole standing at the summit, where Noah was, with great difficulty, scaling the side.

"Okay," he told himself as he struggled to get a foothold and haul himself up another couple inches, "that last-second extra landmark is extra _crappy_ , but I'm still in the lead! Just a little bit more and I'm _actually_ gonna win this!"

The sound of engines drew his attention downward along with the camera. Courtney and Zoey had arrived at the base of the pole, quickly jumping out of their karts and dashing over to start their climb.

"Sorry ladies," Noah called down at them, "but I'm afraid you're too late! I've got this one in the _bag_."

"Hah! I'll be back in my kart before a pencil-armed little geek like you even _reaches_ the top!" Courtney countered harshly.

"Whoa, take it easy!" Zoey told her. "I know it's a _competition_ , but there's no need to be so _mean_ about it. Can't we all just keep being friends?"

"Look, honey," Noah said while continuing his climb, "I'm fine being friendly with you and the others. But Little Miss _Type A_ down there already proved how much she cares about friendship when she asked Spider-Izzy to go after Gwen and Trent."

Courtney gasped in indignation. "Excuse me, but _you_ wanted to get rid of them too!"

"Yeah, if I _had_ to!" Noah replied. "And last I checked I _didn't_ have to last time, so I just let the other team decide!"

"And how did that work out for you, huh?" Courtney asked in a scathing tone. "They voted for _you_ , and it was _your_ immunity statue that caused Gwen to go home instead."

"Oh yeah, because I _totally_ knew who was gonna go home when I played that thing," Noah replied, rolling his eyes. "Oh wait, no, that was _you_! _I_ was just protecting myself, _you_ were the one who went out of your way to try and get one of your _friends_ voted off!"

"I...I was just trying to protect myself _too_!" Courtney spluttered.

"Yeah, and what a great job you've done of it," Noah said as he finally reached the top of the totem, which was carved like an eagle's head. "So good, in fact, that once I win I'm going to vote for _you_ to go home!"

Courtney gave out another indignant gasp as Noah began to shake his can of spray paint. She narrowed her eyes and growled, then threw her own can of paint at the boy in a fit of rage. It hit him in the head just as he started spraying, knocking him off the pole and ricocheting onto the top of the eagle's head. Noah landed with a groan on his back on the ground, his can of paint by his side.

" _Hah_!" Courtney barked with laughter as she reached the top and quickly tagged her A+ over a small black dot, all that Noah had been able to tag before his fall.

"Seriously, Courtney, what is your _deal_?!" Zoey asked with great concern, still climbing up the totem pole. "Why can't we just have a nice, _friendly_ competition?"

/

A flash took the scene to another part of the woods, where Harold, Jasmine, and Trent were all racing one another with fairly content smiles on their faces. Trent laughed triumphantly as he took the lead, only for Jasmine to quickly regain it with a smirk and a "See you later, mate!" She, in turn, was cut off by Harold again, who ramped out of the forest itself to get back in front.

"No, see _you_ later!" he quipped to her, driving off with a confident smirk that was shared by his two friends as they closed the gap he'd created.

/

"Look," Courtney told Zoey in a condescending tone as the shot cut back to the two of them hanging on to the second totem down on the pole, a winking monkey-like head with the bird's wings, "being all friendly with one another is all well and good early on, but at some point you have to make a decision that puts your _self_ above everyone else. And seeing how everyone turned on me the moment they found out I made a decision like that proves that we were never _really_ friends to begin with."

She began to climb down again, and Zoey kept watching her rather than moving up to tag the pole. "Well, maybe if you just _apologized_ to everyone-"

Courtney cut her off with a fierce glare. "Why should I _apologize_ when I did nothing _wrong_?!" she demanded. Zoey was left speechless, and so Courtney huffed and dropped the rest of the way down the pole. She landed right next to Noah as the boy was finally about to get back on his feet, only for the sudden appearance for his teammate to startle him back onto his back.

He groaned in aggravation, and Courtney ran off with the camera following her. Her determined scowl faltered after a few seconds, and she briefly looked back over her shoulder with a look of sadness.

xxx

"Okay, so _maybe_ that wasn't the best move in terms of long-term strategy," Courtney admitted in the outhouse confessional. "But honestly, who does _Zoey_ think she is asking me to apologize, especially when I've _already_ made it clear that I regret not being more clear when I was dealing with Izzy. I _do_ feel guilty about Gwen going home, but there's nothing I can do about it _now_. All any of us can do is keep moving forward however we can."

She paused, let out her breath, and allowed her expression to fall into sadness. "There's no turning back for me..."

xxx

The footage skipped ahead a little ways, now showing three go-karts parked at the base of the totem pole with Trent and Harold climbing up it. The background music turned light yet ominous and was joined by the sound of another engine approaching – an open-roofed jeep driven by Chef with Chris riding shotgun.

"And the winner of Grand Chef Auto _is_...," he said, standing and smiling and spreading his arms before Jasmine suddenly landed on the ground and got his attention. He looked around in blank confusion, then asked "Hey, where is everyone?"

"Going for that last landmark, obviously," Jasmine told him, jumping into her kart and speeding off as Trent landed on his feet, and moments later Harold landed on his chest.

"Yeah, man, the one you added at like the last minute?" Trent told the host before hopping into his gold-kart and speeding off as well.

"You'd think you would've remembered that," Harold finished with a cough as he pushed himself back onto his feet and hurried back to his kart.

Chris raised an eyebrow in confusion and scratched his head. " _What_ last landmark?" he asked with growing worry, Chef whistling nonchalantly while the music peaked dramatically. The host picked up a GPS map of his own and gasped, the camera moving over his shoulder to show the screen: all six player icons were heading towards the fourth flashing point, with Courtney and Zoey in front, Noah a little bit behind them, and the other three right behind him.

"Mount Chrismore!" Chris exclaimed in shock and growing rage, shaking his fist and uttering " _Scarlett_!"

"That Scarlett is one eeeeeevil girl," Chef said.

" _Drive_!" the host demanded as the music trilled angrily. "We have to terminate this challenge with _extreme_ prejudice!"

Chef promptly pressed on the gas, accelerating the jeep so quickly that Chris lost his balance and fell backward into the jeep's cargo bed.

/

The music was low and ominous as the scene moved to Mount Chrismore, the camera panning down to show Courntey arriving hastily with Zoey right behind.

"Courtney, wait!" the indie girl shouted, scrambling forward and extending an arm as the ex-CIT jumped out of her own kart and raced towards the concrete face. "Please! I just wanna...wanna..." She faltered as the other young woman began to climb.

"Wanna _what_ ," Courtney asked sharply, glaring down at the braided girl, "distract me from climbing? Nice try, but I'm _not_ gonna give up so easily. And I'm not _stupid_ , either. Noah made it perfectly clear that if I lose, I'm going home for sure. I'm not letting you win this challenge instead of me."

"I don't _care_ about the challenge!" Zoey yelled, throwing her can of spray paint to the ground and startling Courtney.

The ex-CIT quickly narrowed her eyes in suspicion, however. "So what, you expect me to believe that you care about _me_? Don't make me laugh. We were never on the same team! We barely _know_ each other!"

"Maybe so," Zoey replied, "but I know _Trent_ , and I care about _him_. And...," her anger began to fade into concern, "I'm worried. You really _hurt_ him, Courtney! And I have a really bad feeling about what'll happen to both of you because of it."

Courtney stared at her for a second with her eyes wide and her mouth slightly agape. Then, at the sound of an approaching engine, her face snapped back into a look of absolute determination and she began to climb Mount Chrismore once again.

Zoey sighed and slumped onto her knees in defeat as Noah ran up. "Seriously?" he said in exasperation, his wide eyes locked onto his former teammate. "Did you even _try_ to stop her?" he asked the fallen redhead.

"I just...wanted her to make up with Trent," Zoey said despondently.

"Well a fat lot of good _that's_ done any of us," Noah told her harshly. "Guess it's up to _me_ , now...," he muttered, drawing back his arm, taking aim, and throwing his can of paint at the back of Courtney's head.

It hit the mark easily, earning a pained "Owww...," and a dirty look from Courtney as she rubbed where she'd been hit. "What was _that_ for?"

"I don't know," Noah answered scathingly, "why did _you_ bean me back at the totem pole?" He bent down to pick up his can again, and the shot cut up to Courtney as she growled and continued to climb. Seconds later Noah's can struck again, this time hitting her in the fingers as she reached out for the next handhold.

"Stop that!" she shot downward.

"No!" came Noah's off-screen reply.

The shot cut back down to the base of the mountain as Noah moved to catch his can again.

"Noah, seriously, you should stop," Zoey told him. "This isn't helping."

"Uh, I'm pretty sure it _is_ ," Noah replied, drawing his arm back for another throw only for Zoey to grab hold and stop him. "Excuse me? Do you _want_ her to win?" he asked her in disbelief.

"Well...," Zoey replied uncertainly, prompting Noah to yank his arm out of her grasp.

"Look, honey, she knocked _me_ down, so it's only fair that I return the favor," Noah told her, preparing his throw once more.

"Noah," Courtney called from off-screen, "you better think _twice_ before throwing that at me again!" Utterly undeterred, Noah threw the can anyway, and a metallic clonk was followed by a yelp of pain from Courtney. "NOAH!" she roared down angrily.

"Even if she's being _stubborn_ about it," Noah griped.

"Noah, please," Zoey said, putting a hand on the boy's shoulder.

He gave her a sharp and critical look. "Do you seriously think Trent is gonna like you trying to be nice to the person who got his girlfriend booted?"

Zoey looked taken aback, but before she could answer she and Noah were distracted by the sound of two approaching engines. The shot cut outward as they turned their heads, showing Trent and Jasmine driving up and Courtney shaking her can of paint in preparation.

"Oh man," the musician said, looking up with dread on his face as he stepped out of his kart. "Cournteny can't _seriously_ be about to win this thing? Can't anybody stop her?"

Jasmine put a hand on his shoulder and shook her head. "Sorry, but it doesn't look like it. I'm afraid we'll just have to get her next time.

"Aww, _noooo_...," Trent groaned, sagging in despair.

"More importantly," Jasmine said, looking up and around, "what happened to Harold? I lost track of him a little while ago and I'm starting to get worried."

She was answered by the honking of a horn, and the music increased its pace as the camera zoomed out, then panned over to a slope on the right that Harold was driving up with a wild and confident grin on his face. "Never fear, _Harold's_ here!" he declared as his kart launched into the air. "Thanks to a properly navigated shortcut," he added as an aside to the camera before a piercing scream got his attention and called forth a scream of his own.

The source of the first scream was Courtney, who was forced to let go of her lone handhold and drop before she was hit by Harold's go-kart. The dweeb, meanwhile, had raised his arms to cover his eyes out of fear, and by sheer luck had gotten hooked on Mount Chrismore's concrete nose and pulled from his kart. He grinned once he realized what had happened, and quickly made his tag – a giant blue Ω across the monument's face.

"Yes!" he cheered as he fell down to the ground, the camera lingering on his work as Noah, Trent, and Jasmine whooped with joy from off-screen.

"My _face_!" Chris exclaimed when he arrived moments later, the shot cutting to the jeep squealing to a stop next to Harold as the music faded into a very soft trill. "My beautiful fifty-foot concrete _face_! Did you _have_ to stop at the drive-thru?" he scolded Chef, giving him a light slap on the back of the neck. The hulking man just took a long sip from the drink he was holding.

"Excuse me, Chris?" Harold spoke up form behind the jeep, now on his feet and dusting himself off. "Should I make my vote now, or wait until the marshmallow ceremony?"

"No, no vote for you," Chris told him while stepping off the jeep, putting a hand out to keep the dweeb from getting too close.

"But _why_?" Harold asked in confusion.

"You fell for an obvious scheme from _Scarlett_ ," the host explained as he and Chef walked towards the vandalized landmark.

" _Actually_ ," the evil genius corrected to a sharp note in the music and a shocked look from the two adults, "I _wasn't_ the one who did that, though I appreciate that it brought you all here." The camera panned to the right as she rose up from behind the cover of some rocks at the base of the mountain, took out a remote control, and pressed the button with an evil smirk.

An explosion shook the area and dust swept over all that were present as the top half of Mount Chrismore was detonated, leaving it jagged and hollow above its smirk.

" _That_ I take full credit for," Scarlett said as debris rained down around her.

"But _why_?" Chris asked in despair.

Scarlett tapped her chin in thought for a moment then shrugged. "A mixture of hatred, boredom, access to a site that a person with your ego would _clearly_ be upset about losing, and an excess of on-site explosives," she explained. She descended into a cackling laughter that was quickly joined by Chef, the man even raising an arm and whooping in delight before noticing the glare that Chris was leveling at him. He crossed his arms and started to grumble, the host taking a deep and thoroughly annoyed breath before stepping forward.

"So yeah," he told the campers, Harold walking up behind him, "the real, _final_ landmark was the totem pole. So, immunity and today's _sole_ vote goes to the _first_ person who completely tagged it: _Courtney_."

"Yes!" the girl in question said, pumping her fist in excitement. The other five campers groaned and palmed their faces in defeat and disappointment.

"You have until tonight's ceremony to think things through," Chris told her, "so use your time _wisely_."

"Oh I _will_ ," Courtney said with a sly smirk and glance at the others, who suddenly became nervous.

xxx

"Who to choose, who to _choose_ ," Courtney opened her confessional, a piece of paper in one hand and a pencil in the other that she was tapping against her lower lip. "The problem is they're all such _good_ choices. That's why I'm making a _chart_ to rank them in order of how much of a _threat_ they pose." She flipped over the paper, and the camera immediately cut in close to the top to show a crude drawing of Jasmine with a red X over it and some illegible writing to the right.

"Jasmine's the strongest _physically_ , but since she did so poorly in today's challenge I'm sure I'll get another chance to vote her out," Courtney said. "And while Harold's annoying and has gotten a bunch of wins," the shot panned down to an image of the dweeb, also crossed out with a red X, with a dunce cap on his head and his finger up his nose, "those were mostly _flukes_ so I'm sure I can crush him when it comes down to it. Then there's _Trent_ ," the shot panned down to the third drawing on the page, which had been circled in red with a line leading to a red question mark, though the image appeared to have been crossed out as well. "As long as _he's_ in the game it's gonna be hard to make allies. Buuuuttt...," she seemed to falter for a moment, "well, I just don't think I really need to get rid of him right now. It's not because of _Gwen_ or anything," she hastily explained, "it's just that if he really does start losing it because I'm around, I might be able to convince the other to get rid of _him_ instead of _me_."

"That just leaves Zoey, and Noah...," Courtney continued, tapping her chin thoughtfully with her pencil once again. "Zoey's little _friendship_ speeches really got on my nerves today," the shot cut back in to a close-up of her chart, this time focusing on a dopey-looking drawing of Zoey that had a red circle and question mark but no X, "but _Noah_ hit me with a can of spray paint. _Repeatedly_." The camera panned down to a picture of Noah with devil horns and a rat tail, also with a red circle and questiona mark. "Plus, as the only remaining member of the original Toxic Rats apart from myself, he _really_ should have had my back out there."

She tapped her chin a few more times, took another look at her chart, then shrugged. "Hmm. Well, there's still _plenty_ of time to rethink things. And make new charts, for that matter. I should probably dispose of this one so one of the others doesn't catch me with it."

She crumpled the chart up into a wad, tossed it at the toilet, and walked out unaware that it had merely gotten wedged in the seat.

xxx

A plodding, mysterious tune rose up as the scene cut outside to a long-distance shot of Courtney exiting the outhouse confessional. The camera panned to the left just enough to show Noah leaning against the side of the mess hall, his eyes narrowed in annoyance. "It's about time," he muttered. "It figures she'd forget that the _rest_ of us might wanna use the thing..."

xxx

A bit of static immediately cut the footage back to the confessional camera as Noah walked into the outhouse and immediately noticed the crumpled-up wad of paper wedged in the seat. He made a noise of disgust, then broke off a few pieces of toilet paper and used them to pick it up. He narrowed his eyes in suspicion, then held it up for a closer look. "Wait a minute...," he muttered, "what _is_ this?" With a hesitant look he pinched the other end of the wad, and pulled it open.

His eyes went wide with shock, but it quickly faded into angry desperation as he scanned the page. " _Crap_ ," he said. "If I'm reading this right it looks like _Princess_ can't decide between me and Zoey." He crushed the paper in his hand, and turned a glare towards the outhouse door. "Well then, I guess I'm gonna have to raise the heat under that tea kettle full of _rage_ she has and point her steam in the right direction."

xxx

The music turned dark and ominous as the static cut away to what appeared to be the rear window of a cabin room. It was open, and slowly Noah rose up from below it just enough to look inside with wide, wary eyes. Apparently seeing nothing, he slowly stood then looked from side to side. Apparently seeing nothing once more, took out a small piece of paper, crumpled it into a ball, and tossed it through the window. It landed on the floor next to a bed that looked like it had been used recently, and when the shot cut back to the window Noah was already gone.

The camera turned around to show Courtney calmly entering the cabin, and the perspective moved to the side to show her walk up to the far beds and notice the wad of paper on the floor. Raising a brow in suspicion and curiosity she warily looked around her, then bent down and picked up the discarded paper.

She unfolded it, read it, then growled and crumpled it in one fist. "That _little_...!" she hissed angrily.

/

A few deep notes played as the footage flashed ahead to the bonfire ceremony, the six campers seated in the middle of the rows of stumps – Courtney, Zoey, and Harold in front; Noah, Trent, and Jasmine in back – with host and toxic-marshmallow-bearing assistant standing nearby.

"Alright," Chris began as another set of deep notes opened the standard trill of the elimination theme, "now that she's had plenty of time to think about it, it's time for _Courtney_ to eliminate the player of her choice." He drew a finger across his throat, then put a hand to the side of his mouth and leaned in to the victor conspiratorially. "Choose Harold," he stage-whispered.

" _Hey_!" Harold immediately objected.

"Hmm, while that _is_ tempting," Courtney said with a dark and sly smile, "I'm going to vote for that _hypocrite_ Zoey."

Trent, Harold, Jasmine, and especially Zoey gasped. "What? _Hypocrite_?!" the braided indie girl repeated in shock and confusion. "What are you talking about?"

"Don't play dumb with _me_ ," Courtney said sharply, narrowing her eyes and taking out the piece of paper she had found. "I found this note, or memo, or diary page, or _whatever_ it is by your bed. It told me _all_ about your plan to get to the end and how you were gonna get all your so-called _friends_ eliminated by playing them against each other. And after all that talk today about how you just wanted everyone to get along, it just makes me _sick_."

Zoey gasped in shock and disbelief. "I...I would _never_ do anything like that," she said swiping the note out of Courtney's hand and quickly looking it over. "Heck, this isn't even my _handwriting_ , it's not even _close_!"

Courtney sniffed in contempt. "Yeah, like I'll believe _that_ obvious lie."

Jasmine took the note next. "I'm with Zoey," she said shortly after she started to read, earning a smile from her friend, "this doesn't sound like her at all. Some of these details are just _wrong_ , like how the braids were her idea and not Lindsay's, or her plan to seduce _Harold_ away from _me_ which is just absurd on so many levels."

Harold nodded. "Absolutely," he said, taking the note from his crush. "If you ask me, I'd say this is a _forgery_ designed to turn you against Zoey."

Courtney seemed taken aback. "Wha...what are you talking about?" she asked the others.

Noah snorted and grabbed the note next. "Daredevil boy means you fell for a pretty obvious _trick_ ," he said. "I mean seriously, a note just _happens_ to turn up while you were trying to figure out who to vote for that makes someone out to be a terrible person in just the right way to tick you off? And you _believed_ it?"

"Hey, didn't something like this happen back with Justin?" Zoey asked.

"And there was our _wizard_ friend's fake alliance offer too," Noah added.

"Sounds to me like somebody's been passing notes to sway the vote," Jasmine told Courtney. "And you just fell for it hook, line, and sinker."

"Way to go, Courtney," Trent told the girl, who was growing nervous under everyone's looks.

"W-well...maybe so, but I'm not changing my vote," she said as the music transitioned into the sombre farewell theme.

"And _that_ means the Toxic Marshmallow of _Loserdom_ ," Chris interrupted, bringing the eyes of the campers back to him, "goes to _Zoey_."

The glowing thing was presented to Zoey, who hung her head and sighed sadly.

/

"Well Zoey, it was nice knowin' ya!" Chris told the girl as the scene flashed ahead to them and Chef at the Hurl of Shame, the indie girl seated sadly in the catapult's bucket. "Well, not _really_ ," he smirked, "but you know how it is. Friendship can be so _hard_ to figure out sometimes."

Just then, Trent and Harold and Jasmine and even Noah arrived at the end of the dock. "Sorry to see you go like this," Jasmine told her. "You were a great friend to all of us. You didn't deserve what happened."

"Thanks," Zoey told her with a small smile.

Harold nodded. "Yeah, it'll be a shame to have you gone. It was nice to have someone around who really _got_ me."

Zoey's smile became a little broader. "Thanks. I really mean it."

"Well, I guess this is so long," Trent told her with a short but friendly wave. "And don't worry, I'll make sure to get back at Courtney for you."

Zoey's smile faded into a frown. "Wait, no-" was all she could say before Chef pulled the lever, flinging her screaming into the night sky.

"Welp, glad that's over," Chris smiled, watching her leave then turning back to the camera as the series' capstone theme began. " _Who_ will be the _next_ loser hurled?" he asked excitedly. " _What_ humiliating challenges lie in store? And _where_ will I build my next monument to me? Find out next time, on Total! Drama! Revenge, of the Island!"

(Fade to Credits)

* * *

 **Author's Note - Post Script**

And there we have it, folks! The merge has happened, and the winner-takes-vote along with it. As I'm sure some of you were expecting, Courtney managed to save herself - but rather than vote for Jasmine the threat, Trent the enemy, or Noah the traitor, she votes for Zoey the annoyance after a bit of last-minute note-passing from Noah.

Zoey played her role well, I think - she learned some lessons about friendship, but when she tried to teach others it just blew up in her face. And thus, the final member of the canon season four cast has been eliminated.

Things are taking a turn, folks. Courtney's retreating into the darker parts of herself, while Trent is beginning to focus on revenge, and Noah is complicit with both of them. Jasmine and Harold are still basically the same as before, but who knows for how long...

And of course, Scarlett had her rather explosive cameo as predicted. Not much to say there, I think.

Next week we finally breach into double-digits...and for the first time, that actually means the season is approaching its conclusion! My oh my, I hope you're all looking forward to what's ahead.

Let me know all your thoughts, reactions, hopes, and predictions, and I'll see you all next week.

\- Fangren

* * *

 **Appendix: TSROTI Eliminated Contestants**

Cody - (13th Place)

Izzy - (RETURNED | Formerly AWOL)

Leonard - (12th Place)

Justin - (11th Place)

Lindsay - (10th Place)

Cameron - (9th Place)

Izzy - (Tied for 7th Place | Mutated, but captured)

Gwen - (Tied for 7th Place)

Zoey - (6th Place)


	10. Chapter 10 - Up, Up, And Away In My

**Author's Note**

Here we are, at episode 10...only four more episodes left in the season, and a little over two left for me to write. I hope you're all getting more and more excited about the coming finale!

Now, for the reviews:

 **SilverWriter0927:** Fair enough, I understand the excitement I just got annoyed at the result of it. I'm sorry to disappoint you with Zoey's elimination, and I do hope you enjoy the rest of the season no matter what its outcome is.

 **Gage the Hedgehog:** Thanks!

 **Tokusatsu-31st Century:** Yeah, things just don't look good for Courtney. But things can happen quickly in this series, so I hope to keep your curiosity on-edge.

 **Animation Adventures:** Aye, I was hoping my explanation for Courtney's vote makes sense. Sure, Jasmine is a physical threat in theory, but that doesn't mean every challenge is gonna suit her so Courtney might get another chance to vote her off. I'm glad you enjoyed Zoey so much, and while eliminating her in parallel to Mike in canon wasn't really a big factor in my decision to do it, I'm happy with the poetry of it as well. I hope you enjoy how things proceed this week, I think it's a pretty logical route to go considering how things are and the weirdness of the challenge.

 **VIPGuest:** Uhh, I'm pretty sure I've been hinting at it since episode one? Although last week was the first explicit mention of it as a crush, though.

 **Guest:** Oh, uh, fair enough I guess. I'm not a fan of canon Zoey's portrayal either, though I've never gotten so heated up about it. I am glad you're enjoying pretty much all of the others, however. And as for Harold's crush on Jasmine...well, what comes of it depends on how Jasmine feels about Harold.

 **Sarcasm is a Habit:** Thanks, and I hope you get well soon if you haven't already. I wouldn't really say that Courtney's gone to Cloudcuckooland, though; she hasn't really become that weird or out-of-touch with reality. Not like Izzy, anyway. Anyway, I'm glad you enjoyed last week's episode and I hope you enjoy this week's as well!

 **StayOuttaMyShed:** Wow, thanks! I'm always to happy to hear when an episode becomes someone's favorite for the series. I'm glad I was able to pull off and include so much last week, and make Zoey's elimination episode so enjoyable for you. And a lot more like that is coming in these next few episodes, as plotlines start to unravel and end as everything approaches the finale. I hope you enjoy it, and I hope you enjoyed your cruise.

 **acosta perez jose ramiro:** Yup, pretty much. At this point in the game, everyone left is getting pretty focused and it's easy for some warning signs to slip through the cracks if no one is really looking out for them. Thanks for the review, as always!

 **BuckJohnson:** Haha, yup, at the Final Five already. I'm glad you've enjoyed this season so much and I hope these last four episodes give it a suitable ending.

 **moka evans:** Thanks! Yeah, things are getting darker on Wawanakwa, and don't look to change back anytime soon. Especially with Noah's notes still unresolved and Trent's potential trust issues. I'd say there's several paths for each of the Final Five to take right now, Noah included.

 **bruno14:** Hmm, well, perhaps you're right that Zoey won't be in All-Stars, and perhaps not. We'll all just have to wait and see... And the same goes for who gets voted off this week, although I hope you'll enjoy the episode regardless of who it is.

 **ashDanLand:** Oh, I see. Well, I'm glad you enjoyed the Scarlett cameo at least, and I hope you won't be bored by this week's chapter.

 **PizzaTheBomb:** Yeah, she was easily the best choice to take Duncan's place last week. And I'm glad this season's merge lived up the expectations of drama that come with such events. Now that it's everyone for themselves, relationships might grow...strained. I hope you enjoy what comes from it.

 **P. T. Piranha:** Yup. Aside from Justin, I knew going in that I didn't want this season's villains to act too villainous early on - it's not a strategy they'd want to go to by default, but rather one they are somewhat forced into taking. And yeah, everyone that's still in the game has done enough to justify making it this far. I can agree with your sentiment that canon season 4 was a little too needlessly dark at times, but I think I've made a pretty good point to rectify that - a little darkness is good from time to time, but it needs to be done right.

 **ZachSwag:** Fair enough. I knew I couldn't just leave things with only two notes from Noah, although I am dismayed to hear you feel that this story is getting a little boring. Other than that, interesting predictions and I hope you enjoy what happens next regardless of who gets eliminated and when.

 **OMAC001:** That so? Well, I hope you enjoy the end of Courtney's time on the show this season, whenever it may happen.

 **Glowing Insanity:** Yeah, although I can see myself topping it in terms of shear drama. There's a lot of truth in your assessment of Courtney;s current place in the game, although I can't say much else about her. I expect Noah was never utilized as an antagonist in canon because he's just not very malevolent, which takes away a lot of the cartoonish villainy that I think Fresh likes in their villains. I'll admit that Jasmine hasn't done much so far, but like you said that doesn't mean that'll always be true. As for Trent...well, not much I can say. Harold, on the other hand, certainly hasn't had as much antagonism directed his way like in canon TDI, like you said; but like Jasmine that doesn't necessarily mean he won't have a role to play going forward. And with Zoey, like you said she's had a good go, and I'm glad people have enjoyed what I've been able to do with her in the absence of a boyfriend.

 **GRAMMAR POLICE:** I've been deleting your reviews because you're pretty blatantly a troll, so don't expect another answer from me.

 **DSX62415:** Scarlett is still technically in the custody of the US Air Force at Area 51, on loan via Chris' military connections, so they ended up picking her up after the episode ended. It's nice to hear from another fan of Zoey this season, even given the circumstances, and i do hope you enjoy the rest of the series.

 **Alice Queen of Madness:** ...well, I'm glad I was able to write her well enough for you to change your opinion of her, at least in the context of my story. I hope you enjoy the rest of the season!

 **I. M. Poik:** Ah, I wouldn't get ahead of yourself regarding Scarlett's freedom - she was temporarily let go for the challenge, but that doesn't mean she's truly free. I'm a little disappointed to hear your opinion of Zoey. Still, your thoughts and predictions are as interesting to me as always, and I look forward to seeing if and how they change as we approach the finale.

 **CVluvFoxy:** Thanks! I'm glad I've been able to make Courtney so entertaining for you, and Zoey as well. And yeah, Trent's season two portrayal in canon was just awful; it's not the jealousy, it's how...I don't know, over-the-top it ended up being. I'm glad you're enjoying the others as well, and I hope that continues as we head towards the finale.

 **graveexcitement:** Fair enough. And I'm glad you liked what I did with her chart-making tendency here; I knew I wanted to do something with it as it is actually pretty in-character for her, but as you said it was played poorly in All-Stars - at least have Mal find the stupid thing and not just...turn up with it unexplained. I'm glad you're enjoying my portrayal of Noah, and as for your finale predictions...well, it's only a couple more weeks before you'll know for sure.

 **FOWLKON:** Exactly. It doesn't change how she's been acting, or even the fact that she still voted out Zoey. Even with some focus on the notes, Courtney is in a rough spot - although it's 4 to 1, not 5 to 1 like you said. And yeah, Harold likes Jasmine...but whether or not she reciprocates has yet to be seen for certain in-story. Things are...going to get interesting, it's safe to say.

 **Star Saber21:** Perhaps, perhaps. And yeah, Noah's safety comes at the expense of Zoey...and as for Courtney, well, she was never exactly safe to begin with.

 **link9753:** Ah, sorry to disappoint you then. I'm glad you pointed out that Noah's been a fairly likable and not very villainous villain, as it is something I've been trying to portray with him - he's more a villain due to circumstance, rather than due to his inherent nature.

 **Explorer of the Unknown:** Yup, Zoey's definitely grown both these past few episodes and throughout the season, I think, but I'm not surprised you weren't expecting her to make it to the finale. I think I could have given her a reason to make it that far, but I ultimately had other plans that I liked better. But at least she made a lot more friends, as you mentioned. Harold and Jasmine are certainly going to be a tough team to break up moving forward, but it's not like they're invincible. And while I wouldn't quite liken Noah to an owl, his notes have certainly been able to shift the flow of the game in his favor. But, as you said, Courtney and Trent are easily in the darkest places right now, at least internally, and things are certainly going to get heated because of it. I hope you enjoy what happens...

 **wifishark:** Yup, it certainly seems that way with regards to their villainy. And as for whether one or both will return next season...well, there's only a few more weeks before you'll find out.

And with that, the reviews are out of the way for the week. As usual, the **_poll in my profile will remain up for the time being,_** and **_a TVTropes page for this series exists_** , and as per usual with such things, could always use more work. I thoroughly appreciate those who've already been working on it, and look forward to seeing what you all add next.

The teams have been dissolved, leaving the players as such:

Girls: Courtney, Jasmine

Boys: Harold, Noah, Trent

Get ready for some action in the air, dear readers, and enjoy.

\- Fangren

* * *

 **Episode 10 – Up, Up, And Away In My Pitiful Balloon**

"Last time, on Total Drama Revenge of the Island! The players went on a smash-and-grab graffiti race," Chris began, the opening shot of the island shifting to clips of Jasmine finding a key and giving it to Harold, then Noah getting thrown out from under the kitchen table with a key of his own.

"Trent started gunning for _Courtney_ to avenge his girl _Gwen_ ," the musician was shown talking to Noah and Harold, then glaring and muttering angrily from the roof of the former Maggot cabin, then glaring as Courtney drove off in her go-kart and telling something to Zoey. "Which caused _Zoey_ to go to _Courtney_ to try and get the two to make up," several short clips of Zoey's repeated attempts to talk to Courtney were shown in quick succession, followed by a string of short clips showing Courtney growing more and more annoyed. "But between that and _Noah_ trying to to knock _Courtney_ out of the game himself," the host added over shots of Noah and Courtney arguing, and each throwing spray paint cans at the other to knock their former teammate off a monument, "all it really did was give _Courtney_ the drive to win immunity and the night's sole vote." The ex-CIT was shown tagging the third and actual final landmark, then pumping her fist in excitement a little while later.

"And after a bit of last-minute funny business by note-maker _Noah_ ," the schemer was shown planting his note, and Courtney was found reading it then crushing it angrily in her fist, "it was _Zoey_ who got voted off the island. Too bad, so sad," the host said over Zoey's last goodbyes to her teammates, and inevitable hurling.

The recap ended, putting the scene at the Hurl of Shame with the smiling host watching as a pair of interns – one southeast Asian male on the dock and one white female in the bucket itself – polished the siege weapon. "Missed a spot," he taunted them before facing the camera and raising his arms. "We're down to our Final Five competitors, and you'll never guess who's next to ride the _Hurl_ of _Shame_." With a sly grin he pointed over to the side, the camera panning over to show Chef Hatchet standing by the catapult's lever. He pulled it, flinging the female intern into the air with a scream.

Chris laughed as the other intern glared at him. "Told ya," the host told Chef, the male intern walking off in disgust as the series' capstone theme began a reprise. "What?" Chef shrugged mischievously for the camera. "Catapults are _expensive_. I need to get my money's worth! But someone else will be flung before the day is over. Find out who, right here, on Total! Drama! _Revenge_ , of the _Island_!"

xxx

(Fade to Opening Theme)

 _Dear Mom and Dad, I'm doin' fine;_

 _You guys are on my mind!_

 _Ya asked me what I wanted to be,_

 _And now I think the answer is plain to see!_

 _I wanna be...famous!_

 _I wanna live close to the sun!_

 _Well pack your bags, 'cause I've already won!_

 _Everythin' to prove, nothin' in my way;_

 _I'll get there one day._

 _'Cause I wanna be...famous!_

 _(Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

 _I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

 _I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

(Fade to Episode)

xxx

The scene faded in to Trent, sitting on a stump in the woods playing his guitar. After a few seconds of emotional solo, he launched into rather mournful lyrics. "I'll never forget when we had fu~un, and I'll never forget what she has do~one, to you...to uu~uu~uus, oh!" As he finished his wail, he started to strum faster leading in to the next line. "Courtney, why did you do this? Courtney, why did you take your knife, and stab it in her back... You're not gonna get away, and I'm not ever gonna cut you any...slack?"

He trailed off awkwardly at the end, neither the chord nor the lyrics blending smoothly with what had come before. He frowned, then scratched the side of his head. "Hmm, still needs some _work_...I wonder if I can fit the number nine anywhere? Nine notes? Nine beats? There's gotta be _something_..." He began to slowly play through the chords again, unaware that while he'd been thinking a massive shadow had been moving across the ground.

A few seconds after it finally fell over him he perked up in confusion, then looked around. The background music finally rose up dramatically as he stood up in surprise, his eyes wide and his jaw agape. "Whoa, don't see one of _those_ everyday," he commented as he watched whatever was casting the shadow move across the sky. "Guess that means I should get back to camp...and hopefully give _Courtney_ what's coming to her."

As the shadow moved off of him, he slung his guitar over his back and headed off to the left where the shadow had gone.

/

Another dramatic tune played as the scene cut to a zoomed-out shot of the wreckage of the old Maggot cabin, the other members of the Final Five standing outside as Trent and the shadow approached. A few muttered 'whoa's rose up from the campers, and the shot finally zoomed out enough to reveal the object casting the shadow: a large white zeppelin, which came to a floating halt above the cabins.

"Hmph," Courtney scoffed and walked a few steps to the side, "it's not _that_ exciting. It's just a _blimp_."

As if in response an anchor suddenly dropped down between Courtney and the other campers, landing partially on the ex-CIT's foot and thus causing her to bend over and yell in pain.

"Actually," Harold corrected with smug matter-of-factness as he walked past the young woman and the ship's gondola lowered into view behind them, "it's rigid internal structure marks it as a _zeppelin_ , named after Count _Ferdinand_ von Zeppelin, who-"

He, in turn, was cut off when a gangway slammed down on top of him, earning a groan from the dweeb and yet another dramatic riff in the music.

"You're _both_ wrong," Chris McLean corrected, the shot cutting outward to show him and Chef standing in the doorway the gangway led up to as a grandiose tune played. Courtney was still struggling with the anchor, but Trent, Noah, and Jasmine were watching the host warily. "It's the McLean Mobile Air Command Center! Where _I_ will recline in luxury," the music shifted into something more aristocratic, "while _you_ compete in today's challenge: an aerial _obstacle course_!" He disembarked when he finished.

"An _aerial_ obstacle course," Noah repeated dryly. "What, are you gonna give us all _wings_ or something?"

"With all the toxic waste, that probably isn't too far out of the question," Jasmine told him.

"Mmm- _hmm_ ," Chris said noncommittally as Chef walked to to join him. "And here to demonstrate, put your hands together for Total Drama classic contender, _Alejandro_!" He motioned back up to the gondola door as the arch-villain himself stepped forward with a cold and haughty look as an ominous Latin riff played.

"No _way_ ," Courtney said as she finally freed her foot, the others watching warily as the riff faded in to the three-time player's personal leitmotif and he walked down the gangway. He stepped uncaringly on the spot where Harold lay, eliciting a light bone-cracking sound, a groan, and a twitch from the boy's feet which were sticking out from under the metal walkway.

"Well...never thought I'd get to meet _you_ ," Jasmine said.

"If only all of us could be so _blessed_ , señorita," Alejandro told her with a handsome smile.

Noah snorted. "Please. Who'd be _blessed_ to meet the biggest snake in the game?"

Alejandro glared at him, but the camera quickly panned to the host. "Alejandro will now demonstrate the aerial challenge, while wearing a jetpack." The charmer raised an eyebrow, then gasped as Chef slammed a jetpack onto his back to another dramatic riff.

"Qué?" Alejandro said, the shot pulling back as Chef pressed a button on a remote, activating the jetpack and forcing the young man wearing it into the air. The four unpinned campers watched him fly off with wary faces, and the shot quickly cut to Alejandro's screaming face. The music became fast-paced and hectic as he was shown approaching an elevated ring of fire, then flying through it and several others in a row...then circling around off-screen and flying back behind them. The camera cut in close to the jetpack's flames as they began to sputter and smoke, and with a gasp Alejandro began to descend.

"Everyone, just be cool," Chris told the campers as they watched the failing demo, Harold once again standing among them. "There's a parachute built in to it!"

Alejandro crashed down moments later, landing face-first in the ground. Only then did the parachute deploy, and float uselessly down to cover the fallen young man. "Malditos _incompetentes_...!" he groaned in pain.

Chris laughed. "Best challenge _ev-er_!"

"Uhh, this seems a little more unsafe than _usual_ ," Jasmine said warily, prodding Alejandro's parachute-covered legs with her foot.

"No, it's _way_ more unsafe!" Chris corrected with another laugh. "Did I mention you'll also be attacked by flying mutant fire-breathing goats?"

"What." Noah said flatly as the camera panned across the shocked and horrified faces of the campers.

"Gosh," Harold said, "when you say stuff like that really makes a guy wonder why he's even _on_ this show."

"Well then, how about a little _reminder_?" the host said slyly, reaching down behind him, picking up a suitcase, and opening it dramatically to the Final Five. It was full of money, and an angelic chorus rose up as Chris continued. "The _ultimate_ Total Drama prize, one! Million! _Dollars_!" The camera zoomed in with each word, but when it stopped the chorus did as well and a gust of wind blew a few bills off the top of the stack. "...give or take," the host said quickly.

Harold and the others grinned in stupefied awe. "Okay, I'm not wondering anymore," Harold said. "Now I remember what I'm fighting for!" He snorted and giggled, then added "Hey, that rhymed!"

Trent sighed dreamily. "Man, I can't wait to win and split the money with _Gwen_..."

Jasmine snorted and elbowed him in the side with a smile. "Good luck with _that_ , mate. You're gonna need it." She laughed a bit, but the music became light and ominous as the camera zoomed in on Trent's frown.

xxx

"What was _that_ supposed to mean?" Trent asked the confessional. "Does she not think I can do it? Does she not _want_ me to do it? I thought she was supporting me and Gwen being _together_..." He looked troubled for a moment, then sighed. "Well, whatever. I just gotta focus on making sure Courtney _loses_ this time, and then maybe I can be happy again."

xxx

"Now, to perform your aerial feats," Chris said after handing the suitcase over to Chef, "you'll first have to construct your very own _flying machines_!"

"Sweet," Harold grinned, the shot focusing in on him and Noah.

"Let me guess," Noah said, "building flying machines totally suits your 'mad skills'."

"Uh-huh," Harold nodded. "Plus, since I'm probably gonna build my machine, like, super fast, I can use the extra time to figure out who's been sending notes to everyone."

Noah's brow shot up in surprise. "Notes?"

"You know, the ones that were sent to Leonard, Justin, and Courtney," Harold explained.

"Oh, _those_ ," Noah said with an awkward smile. "Sorry, they slipped my mind because they didn't seem that important."

"Gosh, Noah, of _course_ they're important!" Harold frowned. "I mean, _somebody_ had to have sent them, and whoever did was probably one of us. We should probably try and figure out who it was so they can't cause any more trouble."

"Riiiiight," Noah said slowly and dryly.

xxx

"Yeah, okay, I was kinda hoping the others would ignore the notes for a little while longer," Noah admitted to the outhouse camera. "But now that Detective _Harold's_ on the case, I can at least try and throw him off a little bit. Good thing I already burned all my handiwork, though. Getting caught with those _might_ not be a good _idea_."

xxx

"Hmm...," Harold said, rubbing his soul patch in thought, "who could it be? Well, aside from _me_ , of course. And Jasmine, too. My sweet Australian amazon's not really the _type_. And even when I _do_ unmask the culprit, then what? As her friend it's my _duty_ to avenge Zoey's elimination, but I also still need to help Trent avenge _Gwen's_ elimination. So I guess I'm hoping the note-maker is _Courtney_ , just to make things easier," he admitted with a mild shrug.

xxx

"Uggh, _another_ challenge I have to win," Courtney griped to the camera. "I'm seriously gonna have to put some more effort into making an alliance, even _if_ I don't like any of the others. Then maybe if I lose I can still vote someone else _out_."

xxx

"Alright," Jasmine thought aloud, one arm crossed in front of her as she tapped her chin in thought, "I can't go _too_ strong or I'll just intimidate the others. Still," she smiled, "there's no reason I can't try to-"

xxx

"-kick some _butt_ -" Courtney said aggressively.

xxx

"-win the challenge-" Trent said with a cool and confident smile.

xxx

"-outlast the others-" Harold raised a finger and declared.

xxx

"And get a hold of that cool, cool, million," Noah finished with a smirk.

xxx

The static finally cut away to show massive piles of junk and garbage, the camera panning to the left as Chris – wearing yellow rubber gloves and standing next to a garbage bag – said "Welcome to your one-stop shop for flying machine parts: the _dump_!" The shot pan stopped once the host and campers were in view, and the shot zoomed in on Chris. "Revolting, aaaand reasonably priced," he added, picking up the fly-ridden bag of trash at his feet and holding it out to the disgusted campers. "Each player will pick a card representing their mode of flight," he continued as the shot panned across the wary faces of Harold, Trent, Jasmine, Courtney, and Noah.

"Pick 'em like your _nose_ , losers!" the host said making a noise of disgust as he held the bag open.

Harold walked up first, reaching into the bag and pulling a card out of the slime. "An airplane?" he said as the perspective quickly changed to show a silhouette of an old-fashioned biplane. "Wicked! Time to show off everything I learned at Flighty Steve's Aeronautics Camp," Harold told the host with a grin before walking away.

Trent was next, and cringed as he reached in and grabbed his card. "A _helicopter_?" he said in disbelief as a silhouette of the machine in question was briefly shown on the card he'd drawn. "It's cool and all, but how am I supposed to build one?" he wondered before moving on.

Third was Jasmine, who picked her card without hesitation. "A hot air balloon, eh?" she said as her card's image was shown. "Not too bad. Not too _fast_ , either, but at least I won't have to worry about fitting inside a cockpit."

Next came Courtney, who hesitated a bit before sticking her hand into the bag and shuddered a bit once she did. "A _rocket_?!" she exclaimed as her card was shown to bear the image of a classic rocket shape. "Seriously? Do you _want_ me to get blown up?" she asked the host, who shrugged mischievously. Courtney walked off muttering angrily under her breath, and Noah rolled his eyes as he walked up behind her.

"Okay, what kind of contraption do I get stuck with?" he asked with a smirk as he reached in, felt around, and grabbed a card. "Jetpack? Hang glider?" He finally looked at his card, and his face immediately fell. "... _bird_?" he asked as his card was revealed to hold the silhouette of a condor on it. "You know I was _kidding_ when I was talking about you giving us wings," he told the host, who merely smiled impishly until Noah walked off in disgust.

Chris dropped the bag and turned to the campers, now gathered on the other side of him. "The first camper to show me their finished flying machine wins an advantage," he said, the camera panning rightward on to Chef, who was holding a small device with a Chris McLean face sticker on the side. "A McLean-brand _Smoke Machine_!" the host said, a calm jingle rising up as Chef silently motioned at the machine in his hands, holding it up and displaying it proudly. "Use it as a smokescreen, smoke _bees_ out of your attic, or just create _spooky_ ambiance. Check it!"

At the command Chef turned the machine on, and a stream out at the campers, making them cough.

"Sweet, right?" Chris asked them as the music turned tense. "First to finish their contraptions _wins_ that smokey bad boy. Okay campers, prepare to get your dump on... _now_!"

The campers scattered, with Harold and Trent and Noah headed off to the right while Jasmine, and Courtney after a moment's hesitation, went left. The focus moved to Harold as Trent caught up with him, the musician holding out his card and asking "Hey, I don't suppose you have any ideas on how to build a helicopter, do you? I'm not really sure what I should be looking for."

Harold nodded. "Yeah, you did kind of get a difficult one. I'd say that if you can't find a proper rotor, maybe look for a really big fan instead, probably about 1.8 meters in diameter will work. Just make sure you hook it up to a good engine, otherwise you'll be going nowhere."

"Thanks, man," Trent smiled. "Good luck with your plane!"

As the musician ran off ahead, Noah came up and took his place. "Want any help with your bird?" Harold asked.

"What could you _possibly_ suggest that'll make this any more doable?" Noah asked dryly.

"Well, you could always try building a set of wings for yourself out of feathers and wax," Harold said.

"Yeah, I'll pass," Noah told him. "They did that _last_ season, and it didn't look like my type of thing."

"So how else are you gonna build a bird?" Harold asked.

Noah shrugged. "Ehh, this place is filled with enough crap that I'm bound to think of _something_."

/

The music became slow, plodding, and thoughtful as the scene cut to Courtney throwing things out of the junk pile she was searching through, then rubbing her chin in annoyance. "How am I supposed to build a _rocket_?" she asked herself as she stood up and looked around. "What do I _need_...well, _fuel_ , obviously, and a propulsion system. What was it that the boys used to lift that couch when we had to climb Mount Looming Tragedy? Maybe I should go ask _Noah_...and if he doesn't wanna help, then I can just see to it that he has his _own_ share of troubles." The camera zoomed out as she started to walk back to the right, catching her step absentmindedly off a broken washing machine and fall forward down the side of the junk pile with a startled yelp.

/

Another cut took the scene to Jasmine, who was still walking through the dump with her eyes moving from it to her card and back again. "Alright then, this should be straightforward. First, I'm gonna need a basket, or something else that I can ride in – preferably something _light_." She stopped and looked in front of her, and a short but dramatically triumphant tune played as the camera zoomed out to reveal a wheelchair in a nearby heap.

Jasmine smiled and pulled it down. "Okay, not _exactly_ what I had in mind, but it should work. Next up is something to heat the air with...it'll probably be the hardest thing to find out here to be honest." She looked around a bit, and all of a sudden seemed to notice something off to the left – the camera panned over it as the dramatically triumphant tune played again, revealing a propane burner unit lying on another pile nearby. "Well, that's pretty convenient," Jasmine said with another smirk as she wheeled the wheelchair over and put the burner on the seat. "Now all I need is something to use as the balloon...," she said, looking around again with a hopeful expression.

The camera panned around the junkyard, revealing nothing notable in sight as a much flatter and more depressed version of the earlier tune played. "Well, I guess two out of three isn't too bad," Jasmine shrugged.

/

The shot moved next to Trent, also still looking for the parts to his machine. "Okay...engine, rotor, and I guess something to sit in, too," he repeated to himself. "Hmm...I wonder if nine rotor blades would be too _much_?" he wondered, tapping his chin and looking upward and in doing so allowing himself to trip over something and hit the ground. Though he groaned in pain, he quickly smiled when he realized what he'd fallen over: an old motorcycle.

"Whoa, sweet!" Trent said, standing up and getting the motorcycle back upright. "I guess I have my engine and seat now. Still need a rotor, though," he said, looking around again, "and some way to hook 'em up. I wonder if it would still count if I put it _under_ instead of _over_?" he pondered as he began to walk around again.

Soon enough he tripped and fell again, and again the camera zoomed out from his annoyed expression to show that he'd stumbled over something useful: in this case, a giant fan. "I guess I'll find out," he smiled and he stood once more and adopted a more serious expression. "And hopefully fast enough to make sure _Courtney_ doesn't get her hands on that smoke machine." he added as he picked up the fan.

/

The scene moved back to Courtney creeping through the junk piles. She stopped suddenly at the edge of one, a look of mild surprise on her face as the camera panned rightward onto Jasmine as she tied the burner she'd found onto the back of the wheelchair.

"Not who I was _hoping_ for," Courtney whispered to herself, smiling slyly as the shot moved back to her peeking out from behind an old refrigerator, "but maybe I can get _something_ from her." She hurried out into the open as Jasmine began to open up a parachute pack, but the survivalist quickly noticed.

"Oh," she said flatly, "what do _you_ want?"

"Just...looking for parts for my rocket," Courtney answered with a nervous laugh that ended in a sigh. "Actually, look, I'm gonna be straight with you: I wanna form an alliance." Jasmine raised an eyebrow at her. "I mean, think about it," the ex-CIT pleaded, "once the guys get rid of me _you'll_ be the next on the chopping block. No way they keep around someone as strong as _you_."

"Yeah, I know," Jasmine said as she pulled more of the parachute out.

"You do?" Courtney perked up hopefully. "So...you'll join my alliance?"

"Don't get ahead of yourself," Jasmine told her while unfolding the parachute. "Even if they _do_ try and get rid of me later on, I'm still gonna stick by my friends for as long as possible."

Courtney made an indignant noise. "Well, fine then. I hope you like _losing_ ," she told the survivalist, who was now mostly buried under the parachute.

"I don't plan to," Jasmine told her. "And _don't_ think about untying anything to get back at me," she added sharply, the camera cutting to Courtney's hands freezing right before touching the ropes. The shot pulled out to show the young woman blushing in embarrassment before sniffing haughtily and walking away.

"As if I _would_...," she shot at her opponent.

/

A flash took the scene back to Trent, grunting in effort as he picked up his scavenged motorcycle and put it on top of the giant fan. He adjusted it a little bit, then stood up and wiped the sweat from his brow. "Okay, now I just gotta hook it all together...," he said with a pleased grin.

/

Yet another flash moved the scene to a close-up of Harold, who appeared to be sitting down in something and fiddling with a grimy screwdriver. The camera zoomed out, revealing that he was sitting on a massive cobbled-together tricycle – the one that silent tinkerer B had built in the show's first season – trying to mount a plane propeller on the front.

A soft clanking above and behind him caught his and the camera's attention, both looking over to see the top of a high junk pile as a small tin can started falling and the hole mass began to shift. The music peaked dramatically as Harold threw his arms up defensively and cried "Junk slide!", but after a few seconds of nothing the music calmed back down and he opened his eyes in confusion.

" _Relax_ , Chicken Little, it's just me," Noah said, climbing around the top of the junk pile and sliding down its side with a light bicycle – also built in the first season, though by Scarlett rather than B – under his arms.

Harold stood up, blinked, and grinned. "Looking for parts for your bird, I assume?"

"Asking obvious questions, I assume?" Noah replied before glancing at Harold's creation. "Nice plane, by the way. Don't they usually have wings?"

"I was just about to go look for some," Harold said.

"Cool," Noah said dryly. "By the way, how's that investigation of yours coming along? Figure out who the nefarious _note-passer_ is yet?"

"I haven't had time yet, gosh," the dweeb replied. "But I'm gonna think about it while I go look for the last few parts I need."

"You do that," the schemer smirked. "I've got a bird to build myself, so I'll see you around." He gave his former teammate a finger pistol, then walked away. Once he spotted Harold walking away as well, he let out his breath.

And then slammed right into Courtney. Both former Rats fell backward onto their butts, and rubbed their faces in annoyance.

"Would it _kill_ you to watch where you're going?" Noah griped.

"The same goes for _you_ ," Courtney replied, standing up and only then noticing who she'd bumped into. "Oh! Noah! Just who I was looking for."

"If it was just so you could knock me over, can I leave?" Noah asked dryly.

Courtney leveled an annoyed look at him, then stuck an arm out to keep him from walking past her. "Look. I know we haven't seen...eye to _eye_ lately, but I do still think we should be allies. I mean, the others are obviously gonna go after you next if they can't go after me, so why not team up now and try to turn them against each other?"

"Because Trent hates your guts and Harold and Jasmine are too good of friends with him to go against that," Noah replied. "So in other words, I don't think we _can_ turn them against each other so long as you're around." He lifted Courtney's arm out of his way and walked off, leaving Courtney to gape in frustration and disbelief.

"You could at _least_ tell me how to build a rocket!" she called after him, getting nothing in reply. She growled and stomped her foot, then stormed back the way Noah had came, coming across Harold's half-finished plane along the way but paying it no heed. The perspective moved behind her as she passed it, and she stopped to angrily kick a stray toaster at the junk pile behind it...causing it to shudder and collapse, partially burying the modified motortrike.

Though startled, Courtney shrugged it off and took another step forward...only to quickly stop again, the camera cutting in close as she looked back toward the pile. Her brow rose up along with a dramatic theme, and she quickly adopted a dark and sly grin. "Hellooooooo, _rocket_..."

/

The score fell back as the footage flashed forward to Harold, now walking contentedly with his eyes closed and a pair of surfboards under his arms. He reached the spot where he'd been working before, opened his eyes, and gasped. "My plane!" he exclaimed, running over to his half-buried creation, throwing the surfboards on the ground, and trying to pull it out.

"Oh, was that yours? _Sorry_ ," came the mocking voice of Courtney, the shot cutting over to her smiling slyly down at him. "I had to move some _clutter_ aside so I could work on my new _rocket_ ," she added, the camera pulling back dramatically to show her standing on top of a massive jet engine, mounting an armchair on the top of it.

Harold just scowled up at her and grit his teeth.

/

"Okay, just about... _done_ ," Noah said with a confident smirk, adjusting something off-camera then wiping the sweat from his brow. "You want a _bird_ , McLean? I'll _give_ you one," he declared, a triumphant tune playing as the camera zoomed out to reveal his creation: the base was still recognizable as the bike he'd scavenged, but he'd affixed what appeared to be the head of a swan boat to the front of it and bird-like wooden wings to either side, currently folded upward.

"Alright, time to see what this thing can do," he said as he got on. However, before he could start pedaling, a whooping cheer got his attention, and with a gasp he looked skyward.

"Yeah!" Trent cheered in excitement as he rose up over a pile of garbage on the back of his motorcycle-based hovercraft to a more intense dramatic tune.

"Crap...," Noah muttered in annoyance before the shot cut back to the musician flying quickly through the air.

He looked around with a grin on his face, then angled his craft downward after apparently spotting something. The shot cut outward to reveal that something as Chris, who was watching the musician with a grin on his face and a megaphone in hand.

"Hey man, how do you like it?" Trent asked the host.

"Looks good, dude!" the host replied. Trent beamed but as he began to descend he seemed to lose control of the craft and ended up crashing into the nearest junk pile. Chris winced, then laughed as Trent was shown groaning, his hover-copter's engine and fan shutting down. "Okay," Chris announced through his megaphone as yet another victorious theme began to play, "we _have_ a _winner_! Trent finishes first, and gets a smoke machine!"

A chorus of the four loser's disappointed moans rose up over the dump. "Who will fly high?" Chris asked the camera as it cut back to him and Trent, the musician trying unsteadily to dismount his bike. "Who will crash and burn?" the host added before Trent fell over onto his back with a groan and part of the garbage pile collapsed on top of him. "Literally," Chris said impishly, finally lowering his megaphone as the mystery-invoking tune that usually opened the elimination theme began to play in the background. "And how many Gemmies will I win for this episode? Find out when we return, on Total! Drama! Revenge, of the Island!"

(Fade to Commercial and Back)

The episode resumed on a long-distance shot of the Final Five and their flying machines: Noah with his bird-bike, Trent with his hover-copter, Harold with his aerotrike, Jasmine with her wheelchair-hot air balloon inflated and moored to a stake in the ground, and Courtney's massive engine-rocket.

Some deep strings opened the background music as the shot zoomed in on the boys. "Congratulations on winning," Harold told Trent. "I bet that smoke machine is gonna be super useful."

"Thanks, man," Trent replied. "I couldn't have done it without your advice." Harold smiled and rubbed his nose proudly.

"So I bet you're locking forward to smoking Courtney with that thing, aren't ya?" Noah asked.

"You know it," Trent told him. "She's still gotta _pay_ for voting out Gwen," he said, angrily punching his palm. "...and Zoey too, I guess," he added as an afterthought, slightly surprising both other boys. "Hey, listen," the musician whispered, motioning for Noah and Harold to lean in closer. "How about we form a guy's alliance, just the three of us? That way we can make _sure_ to get rid of Courtney." he asked.

"Hey, there's an idea," Noah smirked. "Count me in."

"Sweet," Trent laughed. "What about you, Harold?" he turned his head and asked the dweeb, who was now frowning in concern.

"Sorry, but I just don't see the point," Harold whispered. "I mean, weren't we all gonna vote for her anyway?"

"Yeah, but this makes it _official_ ," Trent told him. "Plus, if she _doesn't_ lose today, we'll still stick together and make sure none of us decide to work with her."

Noah snorted. "Like any of us _would_. You two have _girls_ to avenge, and let's just say I haven't been on her _good side_ these past few challenges."

"So what do you say, man?" Trent asked his friend, giving him an expectant smile.

Harold just looked at him nervously.

xxx

"What am I supposed to _do_ in this situation?" Harold asked the outhouse camera, his arms spread in wild desperation. "If I don't join, I'll be betraying my friend! But if I do join Trent's alliance and Courtney wins, then I'll have to vote for _Jasmine_! How could I ever vote for the woman I'm in love with? Even _if_ it's probably the better strategy..."

xxx

Before Harold could answer Trent's question the boys' attention was drawn upward as Chris' voice came down from the distant zeppelin. "Players!" he announced, the camera panning across the flaming hoops of the aerial obstacle course as the music became tensely anticipatory. "Prepare to be challenged, in the Obstacle Course of _Doooooom_!"

The shot cut inside the mobile command center as Chris paused to laugh, his favored red megaphone in hand with Chef and Alejandro behind him – his assistant smiling and the arch-villain looking backward in mild annoyance. His perspective showed the million-dollar briefcase standing next to several open crates of golden statuettes in the shape of a slender woman holding up an old television set, but his gaze quickly zoomed in on the prize money. It gleamed tantalizingly, and a dark smile formed on his face as the background music spiked ominously.

/

"So," Courtney said as the scene cut back to her and Jasmine on the ground, "do you really expect that little _balloon_ of yours to compete with my _rocket_?" She patted the side of the massive modified jet engine proudly.

Jasmine snorted. "Yours might _look_ fast, but that doesn't mean it _is_ fast. I mean, how do you even know it'll work?"

Courtney looked taken aback for a moment, but quickly retorted with "Well, how do you know _yours_ will work?"

"Because in case you haven't noticed, it already _is_ ," Jasmine replied, motioning to her balloon which was still floating a few feet off the ground and tethered to a stake to keep it from floating away.

"Oh...," Courtney said blankly before quickly regaining her haughty composure. "Well, I'm _still_ gonna win."

Jasmine snorted again and smirked. "Yeah, well, good luck with that."

As both girls turned their attentions to their machines with smiles on their faces, the music turned ominous and the camera panned over to Trent, who was watching them with a single raised eyebrow.

/

The shot cut back outside the blimp as it slowly flew forward. "Well, there could stand to be a little more _hate_ between Jasmine and Courtney," Chris said as the scene moved to him and Chef inside, "but with Trent _alone_ I'm smelling another Gemmie!" he added with ever-increasing giddiness while, unknown to both men, Alejandro walked over with one of the awards in his hands.

With a dark grin he raised the golden statuette, the camera zooming in on it and staying put as he swung it down hard, hitting both Chef and Chris in the back of their heads, felling both with two cries of "Oof!" and a metallic clang.

The camera cut back to a ways outside the gondola, its door now open. Seconds later Chris was kicked screaming out into the open air, followed shortly by Chef, and the camera zoomed in as Alejandro leaned out of the doorway. "You can _have_ your Gemmie," he called downward. " _I'll_ take the million dollars!" He held up the briefcase of prize money, then turned around and slammed the door behind him.

A long-distance shot of a garbage pile showed Chris and Chef falling just beyond it, the camera quickly cutting over to a close-up of the fallen host. "Unnnh, I think I sprained my stubble," he groaned, Chef visibly lying on top of him.

"Uhh, Chris?" Harold spoke up, the shot zooming out as he ran up to the fallen men. "Alejandro totally just stole your Mobile Air Command Center."

"Whatever," the host said uncaringly. "Got it at the Air Force garage sale."

Courtney arrived next, slamming Harold out of the way. "He _also_ stole the million dollars!" she said frantically.

"Whatever," Chris repeated. "Not _my_ million bucks."

"And all your precious _Gemmies_ ," Noah added, walking up on the other side of Chris and Chef.

Chris's eyes popped open in panic. "My Gemmies?" he asked in concern before picking himself up from under Chef, the background music becoming dramatic once more. "Cancel the Obstacle Course of Doom," the host declared, "your new challenge is, to STOP THAT ZEPPELIN!"

"DON'T _BOTHER_ TRYING TO STOP ME!" Alejandro called down at them, the camera cutting to a long-distance shot of the zeppelin and then to its open door where the charmer was standing with two of the Gemmies. "IN FACT, I'LL BE SO KIND AS TO RETURN _THESE_!" he added before throwing the statuettes out of the plane one after the other. The camera followed them for a bit as they spun through the air, then cut down to Chris running forward with his arms outstretched.

"I've got you, my preciouses!" he called out in concern, the camera pulling backward as he went behind a junk pile at around the same time as his two awards...and based on the ensuing clonks, groan, and cloud of dust, got hit on the head by both and fell to the ground. The dramatic music ended there.

xxx

"Honestly, who does Alejandro think he _is_?" Jasmine asked the outhouse camera, hands on her hips in aggravations. "He makes himself out to be one of the game's strongest competitors, but he's basically just a more talented version of Justin. That's probably why he stolen the zeppelin, he knows he can't get the million any other way."

xxx

"Get your flying machines airborne and shoot down that zeppelin!" Chris commanded, now holding both of the awards that had been thrown but also sporting a few bruises on his forehead. "Aim for the _engines_. Here's your ammo," he looked to the side as Chef walked up holding, of all thing, a wicker basket full of blue eggs, "flying mutant fire-breathing mountain goat eggs!"

The campers looked surprised. "But goats don't lay _eggs_ ," Harold corrected in confusion, "they're _mammals_!"

"Goats don't breathe _fire_ , either. Unless they live here!" Chris smiled. "Thank you, toxic waste," he laughed, causing Noah and Courtney to share an incredulous look. "Whoever takes down Alejandro gets _immunity_ ," the host continued. "Oh, and look out for the flying mutant fire-breathing mountain goats. They are _super_ ticked for some reason!" He looked at Chef, who whistled nonchalantly.

/

The footage flashed back a trio of mutant goats nesting on a cliff side amongst some barbed wire and waste barrels. They didn't react when Chef suddenly dropped down in front of them by a rope around his waist, carrying a wicker basket in one arm and an airhorn in the other, but when the horn was sounded they bleated in panic and flew off, leaving their eggs behind. Chef grinned, tossed the airhorn away, and picked up an egg with a snicker.

/

"Alright," Jasmine said over a close-up of her buckling herself in to her wheelchair, the music becoming low but tense. "Everything's secured," she said, tugging on a few ropes as the camera zoomed out, "so it's time to take to the skies!" She hooked a foot around her mooring rope and used the leverage to pull herself close enough to grab it and unhook its terminal loop from the stake in the ground. Her craft now untethered, she pulled the chain connected to the heat source mounted on a barrel in the back – the flame turned on, and the balloon ascended along with the music.

The camera panned over to Courtney, who was watching nervously from the seat of her engine-rocket.. The shot cut in closer as the background score reached a tenser part, and she frantically started pulling her lone control stick back and forth. "C'mon," she griped, " _work_ already!" She stamped her foot in frustration, and to her surprise the engine seemed to splutter to life a bit...only to die out in seconds. "On, come on!" Courtney growled angrily, unbuckling herself from her seat and stamping towards the back of the engine.

A series of sharp notes were struck as the shot cut over to Trent on the back of the motorcycle part of his contraption, looking over his shoulder and laughing. "Alright," he said, moving his smoke machine onto his lap, "time for me to go up and _Courtney_ to go down. Nine-eight-seven-six-five-four-three-two-one- _go_!" he counted down rapidly, ending with a rev of the bike's engine that got the fan started. Quickly but shakily he rose up, the music picking up its pace as the scene cut to him rising over the crest of a junk pile and moving off towards the distant hot air balloon in pursuit of the even more distant zeppelin.

The next cut put the focus on the figurehead of Noah's contraption, then his pedaling feet, and then on the whole picture as he pumped his legs and built up speed. The sound of an approaching engine caused him to look backwards just in time to see Harold come up next to him in his aerotrike.

"Hey Noah," Harold called out with a jovial grin as his creation started lifting off the ground, "eat my dust!"

"EAT _MINE_!" Courtney roared as she suddenly tore past them atop her rocket, blowing both to the side.

Though the force of her ascent had knocked his plane back to the ground, Harold quickly managed to achieve lift again and sped into the air. Noah, however, was still ground bound. He grunted in irritation, then looked forward. The perspective moved behind him to show a piece of sheet metal lying on the ground at enough of an angle to form a ramp, and Noah grinned. "Alright, time for _this_ little birdie...," he hit the ramp and launched into the air, then flipped a switch on his handlebars to lower his wings and start gliding, "to leave the nest!" He whooped and cheered in excitement as he started pedaling again, causing the wooden wings to flap and take him higher into the air.

The shot cut to Harold as he flew through the sky, only for Noah to suddenly fly up over him, and swoop further on upward with a passing taunt of "Thanks for the slipstream, Ace!" and a short laugh. Harold gasped, but his expression quickly faded into a competitive smirk as he pulled a short lever sticking out under the handlebars and sped up.

A quick-pan moved the scene to the zeppelin, but the shot quickly cut to Courtney as she narrowed her eyes and grabbed an egg from somewhere next to her. "Take _this_!" she shouted, throwing the egg at the errant airship as she zoomed past.

It bounced uselessly off the side of the zeppelin's balloon, and as she went by the gondola below the camera zoomed in through the window to show Alejandro watching with a dark grin. "Ah, how they try their hardest to stop me. _Pitiful_ , really," he said before laughing.

Back outside, Courtney narrowed her eyes into a glare as she looked back over her shoulder. "Great," she said, "now I have to turn this stupid thing _around_..." She flew just off-camera and did just that, reappearing moments later flying in the opposite direction. The shot followed her for a few seconds before quick-panning ahead to the tail of the zeppelin, where Trent was hovering just behind.

Trent looked ahead in close-up towards the sound of the approaching jet engine and perked up. "Courtney's coming," he said to himself while blindly picking up one of his eggs, "maybe I can knock her off..." He grinned, then threw the egg to his right, towards the path of Courtney's rocket.

Unfortunately, unbeknownst to him Jasmine's balloon had risen up between him and his intended target, and so the egg hit the side of the survivalist's wheelchair instead. "Hey, watch where you're throwing those things!" she immediately scolded.

"Aww man, why'd you have to get in the way?" Trent replied, seemingly unaware of her remark as he looked around with wide, frantic eyes.

"Ex _cuse_ me?" Jasmine asked in growing outrage, but the roar of a jet engine had directed Trent's attention downward and so he tilted his hovercraft into a dive, blowing past Harold and Noah as they ascended and causing both of their crafts to spin end-over-end.

"Gosh!" Harold yelled once he and Noah had leveled out, shaking a fist angrily in the direction Trent had gone.

"Thanks for that!" Noah shouted bitterly at around the same time. The camera focused in on him as he grumbled, then started pumping his legs and thus flapping his bird's wings. "This stupid thing is hard to enough to fly as it is," he added under his breath as he ascended to one of the zeppelin's rear engines. He pulled out an egg and threw it at it, but the egg merely splattered into shell and yoke that quickly slid off.

"Wow, what great ammo," he said dryly, already idly holding another egg. He sniffed it, then recoiled in disgust. "I guess it goes with the _smell_ ," he added before an angry bleating got his attention.

A drumroll led into a more ominous tune as a pair of mutant goats were shown flying nearby, quickly joined by a third. They opened their mouths and breathed three streams of fire at him, forcing him to dip down under them. "Yeah, not gonna get any closer to those in _this_ plywood bird," he said with wide, panicked eyes. "Hey!" he called out to them. "Why don't you go burn _that_ instead!" he said, pointing towards the zeppelin. To his surprise, the goat flew past him in the direction he'd indicated.

The shot cut inside to Alejandro standing at the wheel of the airship, gasping as the mountain goats flew up in front of the windshield. "What are _those_ things?" he said in disbelieving horror before gritting his teeth and gripping firmly the spokes of the steering wheel.

Another cut took the scene back outside to the rear of the zeppelin, where Harold and Jasmine were flying alongside each other. Close-ups were shown of each throwing an egg in turn, but both projectiles bounced off harmlessly.

"Okay, the eggs are worthless," Jasmine said. "We're gonna have to find another way to bring this thing down."

"Hmm...," Harold said, rubbing his chin in thought before raising a finger in realization. "A- _ha_! If we can't do it from _out_ side, we'll just have to do it from _in_ side instead!"

"Harold, you're a _genius_!" Jasmine beamed, causing the dweeb to grin proudly and blush faintly. "Alright, I'll take the side door, you go around and see if there's any other entry points. Okay?"

"Of course, I'll be as _bold_ and _daring_ as you want me, my sweet," he said with a close-eyed flourish. When he opened them, however, he realized that Jasmine had already gone ahead, paused for a moment in startled embarrassment, then gasped and accelerated forward towards the head of the zeppelin.

A few deeper notes were struck as the camera followed him past Jasmine, then panned down to show Trent looking around anxiously. "Okay, I just gotta figure out how to keep Courtney from winning this thing." he told himself. "That's _all_ that matters." The sound of the jet engine him in the background caused him to turn his attention to his left, and the camera to zoom under the zeppelin's gondola to show Courtney zooming back to the front of the airship for another pass.

"Awesome," Trent smiled, reaching down for another egg but pausing as he brushed his hand against the smoke machine he'd won. He stared at it for a moment, then palmed his face. "Of course! How could I be so _stupid_?" He picked it up and pointed it behind him, and once he heard the engine approaching he turned it on. His aim was off, unfortunately, and the engine-rocket just blew threw the smokescreen while Courtney laughed mockingly. Trent frowned and pointed the smoke machine forward with one hand while accelerating his hovercraft upward with the other, but rather than catch Courtney in the stream he only ended up blowing smoke at Jasmine.

"What's your _deal_?" she coughed, waving away the cloud that had enveloped her until it finally shut off at the source and dissipated.

"What's _your_ deal getting in the way again?" Trent replied angrily.

"What are you _talking_ about?" Jasmine asked, but he'd already spotted Courtney circling back around on the other side of the airship and had turned around to intercept her.

/

A flash took the scene back to the front of the zeppelin, where the three mutant goats were still harassing it with angry bleats and the occasional burst of fire breath. "Malditas _cabras_...," Alejandro swore as the shot cut inside the gondola and in a fit of anger he spun the wheel to the side, stopped it, and spun it back the other way. The music picked up dramatically as the camera cut back to the open air, the zeppelin suddenly moving up and down. The goats quickly scattered, and the shot panned down to show Harold swooping and swerving as the massive balloon moved into his path from one side and Courtney sped past on the other. He nearly ended up colliding with Trent as well, who'd come up from below the airship with a rather desperate look on his face and an egg in his hand.

"Dude, watch where you're going!" the musician said as the two corrected their flight paths and started moving side-by-side in front of, and just below, the airship.

"Hey, it's not _my_ fault the zeppelin suddenly jerked around like that," Harold retorted.

Trent sighed. "Yeah, sorry for snapping at you. I'm just so stressed because I haven't been able to stop Courtney at all. I guess you haven't been having much luck with that either?"

"Why would I even be trying?" Harold asked in confusion.

"Uhh, do you _not_ want Courtney to lose?" Trent replied with irritation.

"Of course," Harold said, "but I can do _that_ by winning before she does."

"Fat chance with her zipping around like that," the musician argued. "Once she figures something out she'll be too fast for us to stop! That' why we have to take her out _now_!"

"But you just said you haven't been having any luck with that!" the dweeb said.

"Yeah, because _I've_ been the only one trying," Trent said with a hint of anger. " _You've_ been trying to win, Noah's off who _knows_ where, and _Jasmine_ keeps getting in my way!" He looked away irritably as he said the survivalist's name.

"Hey, what's your problem with Jasmine?" Harold asked accusingly. "First the guy's alliance, and now this? I thought we were all supposed to be _friends_!"

"So did I," Trent answered, "but between how she's been talking and how she keeps _conveniently_ stopping me from taking out Courtney, I'm starting to doubt that she's really on my side here."

"Don't be ridiculous!" Harold cried in outrage. "Just because some of us aren't _obsessing_ over it doesn't mean we all don't want Courtney _gone_!"

"Oh, so now I'm _obsessed_ , am I?" Trent replied. "Thanks for the _support_ ," he added bitterly before swerving back around. Harold watched him go for a moment, then huffed and angled his plane upwards.

/

Another flash took the focus over to the side of the gondola, with Jasmine's balloon floating just outside the door. "Okay, just gotta get this open," she told herself as she reached out and grabbed the door handle. "Nice and slowly now," she said with a hint of nervousness, smiling when something clicked and the door silently swung inward. With her left hand on one of the balloon's ropes she unbuckled herself with her right, and hesitantly stood up as the background music became more and more dramatic.

The camera quick-panned down and towards the left, landing on Trent as he looked back over his shoulder with a scowl. "Stupid...some friend _he_ is," he muttered, the shot zooming out to show the distracted musician heading towards Jasmine's balloon as she slowly stepped into the open doorway. His path headed underneath her chair...which would have been a clear route for him, had it not been for the balloon's mooring line that was still dangling freely.

The loop at the end of the rope hooked onto the front of Trent's motorcycle as he passed by, causing the entire balloon to jerk out from under Jasmine, in turn causing her to slip and fall backward into open sky with a startled and terrified scream that cause Trent to gasp and slow down. The survivalist just barely managed to grab hold of one of the legs of her former seat as she fell past it, but all the jostling had caused the flame of her creation's burner unit to move closer to the bottom edge of the balloon, causing it to ignite.

"Trent," Jasmine gasped as she hung on her dear life, "what have you _done_?!"

"I...I...," Trent babbled in panic. " _Me_? What were _you_ doing?"

"NOT _THIS_!" Jasmine yelled. "NOT HANGING FROM A _BURNING HOT AIR BALLOON_!"

Trent gaped, but before he could say anything more the giant fan of his hovercraft started to sputter and spurt out smoke. "Aww man, I don't think this thing can handle the drag of the balloon!" he exclaimed. "We're going down!"

" _YOU THINK_?!" Jasmine roared before the entire tangled-up and burning mess began to slow and descend, its two captive riders screaming along with it...

/

The music became even tenser and more dramatic as the scene flashed to Noah flying his bird-bike along the top of the zeppelin, his legs pumping and breathing heaving and hair streaming backward in the wind. "This is easily the most insane thing I've _ever_ had to do," he told himself. "Seriously, how are any of us supposed to take down a zeppelin with a couple _eggs_?" He was momentarily distracted by Courtney's engine-rocket zooming by in the background, but he quickly turned his eyes forward again. "Well, at least I'm not the _only_ one still up here," he said.

He was startled again by a sudden jet of flame shooting up in the background, and he looked in shock as Harold flew up past the edge of the zeppelin screaming between another two jets of fire. "Go away! I don't have any more of your eggs!" he yelled as the three mutant goats flew up after him.

"Great," Noah said in shock and disbelief, "now _those_ things are back!" He fell silent for a moment, then his eyes suddenly widened in realization. "Wait! The goats!" he exclaimed, turning his bird around to fly after Harold's pursuers.

The shot cut over to Courtney, still flying around on her rocket. "Okay, this time for _sure_ I'm gonna get it," she told herself as she circled around, the perspective moving over her shoulder to show the front of the zeppelin moving back into view.

A sudden sputter and puff of smoke from her engine quickly got her attention. "Oh no," she said in alarm, "not _now_!" She frantically moved her control stick but it didn't seem to have any effect, and the musical score became even sharper as the shot zoomed out and the old jet engine began to fall apart at the seams. Courtney screamed as a few small explosions propelled her, her seat, and one of the top panels of the engine casing forward towards the zeppelin, through its glass windshield and into the gondola – and Alejandro, who was screaming and steering fruitlessly at the helm.

They tumbled a few feet across the floor, landing face-to-face with Courtney on top. Though startled, the young woman quickly kneed Alejandro between the legs then scrambled up. Looking around, she spotted the million dollar briefcase sitting against a wall further back in the room.

"Yes!" she cheered, holding the case high above her head as a triumphant tune played...and promptly petered out as Alejandro's arm reached into the close-up and tried to pull it away from her. "Hey! How did-" she asked in disbelief as the shot zoomed out to show the two playing tug-of-war over the prize money.

Alejandro cut her off with a chuckle. " _Please_ , señorita, after having it happen so often on this show I've learned how to take such blows in stride. Now if you wouldn't mind, _this_ ," he tugged hard on the case, forcing her to stumble a step forward before tanking it out of her hands entirely, "belongs to _me_!" He thrust the case right back at her, knocking her to the ground.

"In what _way_?" Courtney replied with indignant anger, still sitting on her butt. "You never even made a _finale_!"

"So _what_?!" Alejandro replied. "After all the pain and humiliation I've been forced to endure on this show, I deserve the money more than _anyone_!" He stepped over and past her, and the camera zoomed in as she gasped, then growled in anger.

"Well _too bad_ ," Courtney said as she got to her feet, springing forward and getting her hands on the case just as he reached the helm again, forcing him to turn around and renew their struggle. "This is _my_ season, and _my_ million dollars!" The music rose up violently and dramatically once again as they battled over the briefcase, but a sudden jolt caused both to stumble and slam against the helm as the zeppelin began to dive.

They gasped in panic and confusion, and the shot cut outside to one of the front engines, now on fire with the three mountain goats flying to the right along the diving airship. The camera quick-panned over to the rear port-side engine where Noah was waiting, his gaze held backwards as he pedaled hard to flap in place.

"They're coming!" Harold called out to him, suddenly flying past.

Noah nodded as his fellow nerd swooped off-screen, then looked back in the direction of the approaching bleating. "Is that all you petting zoo _rejects_ have got?!" he yelled before speeding up and diving away before three jets of fire streamed towards his former position, two of them hitting the engine and igniting it.

The camera cut over to a view of the starboard rear as first Harold, then Noah, then the goats flew around the tail and back up towards the front of the airship. "Alright, this is the last one!" Noah called out as the two boys reached the rear starboard engine.

"Roger," Harold replied as the two began to slow down enough to stay by the engine. "You mutants will never be able to catch the _Red Harold_!" the dweeb looked back and boasted, immediately screaming and swerving out of the way of a jet of fire-breath.

The shot cut back inside the zeppelin's gondola as the whole ship lurched yet again, the bumping and sharp tilting causing Courtney and the briefcase to tumble over and out of the broken windshield.

She recovered from her impact-induced daze in freefall, and quickly realized the million dollar briefcase was falling in front of her. " _Yes_!" she said, reaching out to grab it...only for Chris to promptly fly up with his jetpack and grab it by the handle instead.

"A million bucks, finders keepers!" he said in mocking sing-song before zipping upwards to the sound of an explosion and yet another dramatic rise in the background music.

Courtney gasped indignantly, then furrowed her brow in annoyance. "Oh, he's _good_ ," she said.

The shot cut back to a head-on shot of the fallen zeppelin, all four of its engines flaming and smoking, then zoom-cut to Noah watching the crash over his shoulder. "Alright, we actually pulled _off_ that crazy plan!" he cheered in excitement before looking to the side and screaming as the shot zoomed out to reveal that the right wing of his bird-bike was on fire as well.

His scream continued as his craft started diving into a tailspin, but with the accompaniment of a suddenly victorious tune Harold flew past the falling craft in his aerotrike, scooping Noah away from danger. "Don't worry, buddy, I've got you covered," Harold said, the shot cutting in to show the boy he'd rescued sitting awkwardly on his lap.

Despite the circumstances, Noah couldn't help but snort and grin and put an arm around his savior's neck. "Thanks, Ace. Looks like I _don't_ have to save my own butt for once."

The two laughed, but the shot quickly cut down to water level where Jasmine and Trent were treading water, watching the zeppelin crash into the lake in the distance. "Man, I hope the guys are okay," Trent said in concern.

Jasmine glared at him. "Oh, just go _away_ ," she snarled, forcibly dunking him into the lake then swimming away. He resurfaced quickly, but his look of confusion quickly turned to terror as the camera followed his look to the side, revealing Fang looking up out of the water with a menacing grin. Trent yelled and began to swim away, the mutant gave chase, Courtney fell into the water nearby, and the shot zoomed up and over back to Noah and Harold flying against the sunset sky towards Wawanakwa, the mutant goats bleating rather peacefully a little ways behind them.

/

The footage immediately skipped forward to the campfire ceremony, a few deep notes signaling the shift in the music towards the usual elimination repertoire. The Final Five were all sitting in the front row, with Noah on the far left, followed by Harold, Jasmine, Courtney, and a rather irritated Trent. The two nerds were already holding marshmallows.

"Elimination time!" Chris began from off-screen. "Noah, Harold, the two of you took down the zeppelin together so you're both _safe_ ," he continued as the camera slowly panned away from the campers, "but the _rest_ of you are on the chopping block." The scene finally moved onto the two adults, Chris standing at his podium with a tray of two marshmallows with Chef standing nearby in his hazmat suit, displaying the Toxic Marshmallow of Loserdom in its open box for all to see.

"Regular marshmallow means you're safe," Chris reminded everyone. "Toxic Marshmallow of _Loserdom_ means you're out. Aaaand, probably mutated." Another round of deep notes led into a trill as the shot cut back to the campers still on the chopping block. "The next person _safe_ is... _Jasmine_ ," the host said, tossing a marshmallow to the delighted survivalist, though her joy quickly turned into anger as she turned her head to her left, the camera panning along to focus better on Courtney and Trent.

"And with _three_ votes against," Chris announced, the shot cutting back to him and Chef as the tension rose in the music, "the Toxic Marshmallow of Loserdom goes to..."

As he lingered the music became more and more ominous, the camera cutting to and zooming towards Courtney and Trent as they leveled harsh glares at one another. Each was shown in turn in close-up as they looked back towards the host, Courtney biting her lip while Trent quickly closed his eyes and started tapping his lucky rabbit's foot to his forehead, his own lips muttering numbers in sequence.

" _Trent_ ," the handsome host finally said.

" _Nine_ ," Trent finally said as well a moment later, opening his eyes and quickly ducking under the irradiated treat. He sat back up and looked over at the other in shock as the music reached its sombre yet reverent farewell piece. "Guys, what's the deal? I thought we were gonna vote out Courtney?"

He motioned to the girl in question, who smiled smugly, caught the marshmallow tossed her way and popped it into her mouth, then gave the musician a short, finger-wiggling wave.

"The _deal_ is that your obsession with revenge nearly got me seriously _hurt_ ," Jasmine scolded him. "Don't get me wrong, I don't like what Courtney's done either, but your recklessness went too far. I should've listened to Zoey when she warned me that something bad might happen with you."

Gaping, Trent turned to Harold and Noah for confirmation. And while the schemer himself gaped slightly in surprise, the dweeb nodded solemnly before opening his eyes and giving Trent a stern look.

Trent scowled. "Some friend _you_ turned out to be," he said bitterly.

"Hey," Harold replied, "you're not the only person out here that I have a _bond_ with, okay? And just because I recognize that you went too far doesn't mean I don't think of you as a friend."

Trent rolled his eyes as he turned to walk away. "Pfft, whatever man," he said before getting abruptly grabbed by Chef and dragged away with a startled yelp.

/

The scene flashed to the docks, Trent already loaded into the Hurl of Shame. "Any final words to your fellow competitors?" Chris asked him.

"Not really," Trent replied with a surly expression, not causing the host to so much as flinch. "I'm coming, Gwen!" he shouted as he was hurled into the night, the words fading into the distance as he did.

The shot cut to the Final Four watching from the shore, then to a close-up of Harold as he hung his head and sighed.

xxx

"Well, there goes another friend," Harold told the outhouse camera, giving the wall-mounted roll of toilet paper a halfhearted spin. "And to make matters worse, I never even got to go through with my investigation of the notes. It had to have been _someone_ who would want Courtney to vote out Zoey, but I just don't see who..."

He trailed off there, his eyes suddenly going wide in realization. The camera rapidly zoomed into them, and faded from that shot into a series of faded bits of earlier footage...

/

Noah's brow shot up in surprise. "Notes?"

/

"Oh, _those_ ," Noah said with an awkward smile. "Sorry, they slipped my mind because they didn't seem that important."

/

Noah snorted. "Let's just say I haven't been on her _good side_ these past few challenges."

/

Despite the circumstances, Noah couldn't help but snort and grin and put an arm around his savior's neck. "Thanks, Ace. Looks like I _don't_ have to save my own butt for once."

/

The music rapidly rose into something high, ominous, and eerie, as the shot zoomed back out to show Harold gasping in the outhouse confessional. " _Noah_..." he whispered as the music peaked, then cut back into silence.

xxx

The capstone theme began immediately as the scene returned to the Dock of Shame, Chris standing alone by the season's catapult. "And then there were _four_ ," he told the camera. "Will _Courtney_ ever get her hands on the million? Or will _Jasmine_ crush her in _front_ of millions? Will _Harold_ expose the source of the notes? Or will _Noah_ write him into a corner? Find out next time, on Total! Drama! _Revenge_ , of the _Island_!"

(Fade to Credits)

* * *

 **Author's Note - Post Script**

And thus, Trent proves his own downfall. For although the others are certainly angry at Courtney for her hand in eliminating Gwen and Zoey, she never caused (or nearly caused) serious injury with her recklessness. And although Jasmine was doing something risky, she had little reason to expect anyone to do what Trent did and in fact would have pulled it off without a hitch had he not been distracted, and as such she is completely justified in her anger. And with Harold's devotion and Courtney knowing an opportunity when she sees one, Trent's fate was sealed. I hope I didn't disappoint any Trent fans too bad.

I also hope you liked my choices for the flying machines. Although the rocket would be more suitable for Harold on the face of things, I decided that I didn't want things to go as close to canon as that would imply - so instead of the smart guy getting basically an auto-win by flying the jet engine into the zeppelin, Courtney's subpar engineering skills meant I could have her ride fall apart, leading her to crash into the gondola as Lightning did in canon. From there, giving Trent the helicopter was obvious (even if I only wanted to use the hovercopter as a fall-back plan in case I couldn't come up with a more original design, which is sadly what happened), and likewise with Jasmine and the balloon and Harold with the plane. And Noah getting the bird was, of course, primarily for comic effect. And, of course, as i wanted to incorporate elements and references to the unique happenings of the Shuffledverse, I decided to include B and Scarlett's bikes from season one into the designs of the airplane and 'bird'. I hope you liked them.

Let's see...not much else to say, other than that I'm glad I decided to include the scene of Harold's epiphany regarding the notes. I knew I wanted to lead up to something like that all chapter, but while the more formal investigation was my first idea I just never had the time to really go anywhere with it directly.

Anyway, let me know what you thought of the chapter! I'm eager as always to know what I did right, what I did wrong, and what you're all hoping and/or predicting for the future.

See you all next time!

\- Fangren

* * *

 **Appendix: TSROTI Eliminated Contestants**

Cody - (13th Place)

Izzy - (RETURNED | Formerly AWOL)

Leonard - (12th Place)

Justin - (11th Place)

Lindsay - (10th Place)

Cameron - (9th Place)

Izzy - (Tied for 7th Place | Mutated, but captured)

Gwen - (Tied for 7th Place)

Zoey - (6th Place)

Trent - (5th Place)


	11. Chapter 11 - Eat, Puke, and Be Wary

**Author's Note**

Only a few more episodes left, folks. I'm on schedule to start work on the season finale on Sunday, so it's safe to say that things are drawing to a close. I hope you're all looking forward to it!

But for now, on to the reviews.

 **Gage the Hedgehog:** Thanks!

 **CVluvFoxy:** Yup, Courtney was spared once again, ironically because of her biggest enemy. And yeah, Harold's on the right track with the notes...but you'll have to read on and find out what comes of it.

 **Silver Writer 0927:** Well, sorry to disappoint with the Trent elimination. I hope you can still enjoy the rest of the season.

 **Tokusatsu-31st Century:** Good to hear it; it was my intention to show that Trent can indeed get a little...intense, at times, just like in canon. He's driven, and he has strong emotions, and sometimes that comes back to bite him in the butt. He's a lot like Courtney in that sense, even if he isn't as obvious about it.

 **Animation Adventures:** Yeah. Although Gwen will be understanding, Trent is probably gonna be hard on himself for pretty much completely failing to accomplish his goal. But sometimes these things just happen... Anyway, I'm glad you enjoyed my re-use of the motorcycle hovercopter from canon as Trent's vehicle, and likewise with my use of B and Scarlett's bikes - you're right in that, to an extent, they symbolize which 'side' Harold and Noah are on this season. Oh, and thanks again for helping me figure out next season's cast.

 **P. T. Piranha:** True, true. And to be honest, I wasn't really intentionally modeling Trent's behavior as a mirror to Zoey's from canon; I just kind of extrapolated on what we saw from Trent in canon in a way that fit the story and led to his elimination. And it's probably more my fault that you got lost a bit in the second half of the challenge, I could've done more to describe exactly where everyone was with respect to the blimp.

 **acosta perez jose ramiro:** Thanks! And yeah, that's a big part of what Jasmine and Harold were thinking last week - Trent nearly hurt Jasmine in his pursuit of revenge, so it would be too risky to keep him around.

 **PizzaTheBomb:** Is that so? Well, I'm glad I good live up to it. You're right in that Courtney's obnoxiousness does make for good comedy, though it's also what turns people off of her... Anyway, I'm glad you enjoyed Jasmine's reactions to Trent's reckless revenge attempts, as well as the vehicle pairings in a general sense. I hope you enjoy what happens next!

 **The Prime Writer:** Fair enough. And yeah, the way Trent was handled in canon TDA was just awful, as you said; I'm glad I was able to take the parts that would make him a more fleshed-out character and execute them in a much more realistic way. And your analysis of the others is good as well - Courtney is indeed returning more towards her initial state or elitism, while Harold...has some things to think about. I hope the path I've decided to put him on proves interesting. Regarding last week's cameo, while Sugar would have been a good choice as well I'm glad I chose Alejandro; they both have valid parallels to Heather, but I liked Alejandro's more. As for the future...well, it is certainly up in the air for everyone. And regarding Izzy and Fang, I will say that I do have a resolution in mind for their part of the story...but you'll have to wait and see what that is.

 **FilipinaPossible:** Thanks! Courtney did certainly get lucky last week...but that doesn't mean she, or really anyone, are entirely safe this week.

 **Sarcasm Is A Habit:** Yup, that was a fairly big hint that things weren't gonna go well for Trent last week. I'm glad you're enjoying the Final Four, and that you're looking forward with excitement to both the finale and next season. Oh, and the four episodes remaining I mentioned last week included episode 10.

 **moka evans:** Fair enough. Sorry to disappoint you with Trent not getting as much use as you were hoping for. The intern getting hurled was a joke in canon, so I can't take credit for it. I am glad you enjoyed Harold so much last week, though; it's always nice to hear that I've written a character well. The same goes for the others - I'm glad you enjoyed the roles each of them had to play in the episode reaching its conclusion, and I hope the same holds true this week. And as for Alejandro's cameo...well, I'm glad I was able to deliver something worthwhile.

 **Glowing Insanity:** Yeah, looks like it. Admittedly, Courtney was probably the more obvious choice to go home until Trent started acting as he did. And while I'm not entirely sure why you were expecting Amy instead of Alejandro, I'm glad the latter's inclusion helped make the episode so great for you. And as for your predicted scenarios...well, they're interesting, as such things always are for me. I hope you enjoy what happens this week!

 **ashDanLand:** Good to hear it! I'm glad my version of the episode lived up to your love of its canon equivalent, and surpassed it in terms of the elimination. I, personally, was fine with Jo getting the boot there, but I can see why others might not be. So I'm happy I was able to improve that aspect for you, and that you loved Alejandro taking Heather's place as cameo as well. I hope you enjoy what happens with the Final Four!

 **Explorer of the Unknown:** Ah, well, fair enough. I can't expect everyone to be perfectly happy about how Trent's elimination went down. But, as you said, there's still opportunity for Trent to see the error of his ways, as it were. And I hope that you enjoy how the massive knot of possibility unravels with this week's episode. It's astounding hos little is left in this season...

 **Guest:** Well, revenge does odd things to a person's mind. But yeah, he's with Gwen now, so perhaps he'll be able to calm down. And you'll certainly see what leads from Harold's revelation, and how close your theories are to reality, so enjoy...

 **VIPGuest:** Fair enough, I guess that's on me for not drawing more attention to it before recently. And Trent, I think, had shades of this sort of potential even in canon; it wasn't very noticeable most of the time, though. He's a surprisingly complex guy. And...I wouldn't exactly called it Total Friendship Island, even if friendship ended up being a pretty big theme this season.

 **FOWLKON:** Yup. Even with Courtney so unpopular with the rest of the cast, it doesn't mean there can't be other, better people to vote off at a given moment. An interesting analysis regarding Harold's potential course of action with his newfound suspicion of Noah, as well as the remaining campers' possible mirrors from the canon season. And the outcome of this week's challenge too. I hope you enjoy what happens, and I look forward to seeing if/how your thoughts change afterward.

 **I. M. Poik:** Yeah, looks like Harold and Jasmine weren't the only ones getting irritated by Trent's quest for revenge. And yeah, Jasmine 'getting in the way' so much was entirely coincidental in-story, not that Trent was willing to consider it. As for the villains, I've actually been trying to portray both Courtney and Noah as not outright and irredeemable villains; they both have mostly just been trying to save their own butts, as you said, and mostly haven't entirely been malicious (although Courtney has still been more malicious than Noah). Anyway, I hope you enjoy the episode this week, even taking the cameo into account. Izzy's rivalry with Fang will be resolved eventually, and though I didn't consider eliminating Trent in ninth place I did consider eliminating him in the ninth episode.

 **bruno14:** Yup, and I'm glad you enjoyed last week's episode. Your prediction is interesting as always, though admittedly a little wide since you said you could see three out of the four remaining players going home. But still, I hope you enjoy what happens!

 **OMAC001:** Haha, yeah. Every season has to have a gross-out challenge somewhere.

 **ZachSwag:** Great to hear it! I hope you continue to enjoy these last few chapters.

 **DSX62415:** Yup. Trent was far too focused on one particular method of ensuring Courtney's loss, and in doing so caused his own.

 **Alice Queen of Madness:** Hah, I'm glad my choice for the Final Four has gone over so well with my reviewers. I'm sure we'll all get to see a bit of Gwen's reaction to what Trent did when we see them again in the finale, but you'll have to wait a few more weeks for that. And as for Harold and Noah...well, you'll have to read on and see for yourself.

 **graveexcitement:** And you were right! Although they've been friends all season, some things just can't be ignored. Thank you for pointing out Noah's fatal flaw; I actually wasn't conscious of it when I was writing the events leading up to Harold realization, but I can definitely see it fitting in. And while I will agree that Noah could have explained things better to his team in Dodgebrawl, it probably wouldn't be enough - Heather wouldn't be satisfied unless he proved it, and the team in general wouldn't take that excuse after both Cody and Harold did so well in the challenge. But yeah, anyway, I'm glad you've enjoyed my interpretation of Noah so much! He's certainly not in as good of a position as he used to be in going into this week's episode, but as your own thoughts on the finale suggest there's a lot of different ways for things to go down. I hope you enjoy it regardless.

 **Star Saber21:** Thanks! And yeah, while Alejandro's numerous injuries and humiliation have been funny for us...well, it goes without saying that they weren't funny for him. But I guess that's just what makes it all so...funny?

 **link9753:** That is, in part, what I've been going for with Noah's actions this season - although the others would have a basis to be angry with him, and to distrust him, he was ultimately acting out of self-preservation. Of course, his role in sending the notes isn't entirely out of the bag yet, so I won't say exactly how things play out for him. Especially since, as you said, any of the Final Four could reasonably make it to the finale. I hope you enjoy this week's chapter as much as you did last week's.

 **wifishark:** Hmm, well, you'll see soon enough. I hope you enjoy how things play out!

 **StayOuttaMyShed:** With 'soon' in this case being four hours after you left your review...sigh, I've been getting these out later and later it seems... But anyway, on to more substantive matters. I'm really happy you enjoyed how everything went down last week, between Courtney being Courtney and Alejandro being Alejandro, to Trent's increasingly reckless attempts to get rid of her leading to his own downfall, and of course to Harold's realization. And as for Trent being on the villains next season...well, it's an idea, but I'm afraid you'll have to wait a few more weeks to see the cast I've decided upon. And I do hope that you enjoy it regardless of whether or not Trent makes the cut.

And that, dear readers, is the reviews taken care of for the week. As I'm sure you all know by now, the **_poll in my profile will remain up for the time being,_** despite me admittedly forgetting that it exists a few times by now, and **_a TVTropes page for this series exists_** , and as per usual with such things, could always use more work. I thoroughly appreciate those who've already been working on it, and look forward to seeing what you all add next.

This week the Final Four will become the Final Three. Who will they be? Read on and see.

Enjoy!

\- Fangren

* * *

 **Episode 11 – Eat, Puke, and Be Wary**

"Last time, on Total Drama Revenge of the Island!" The recap opened with a shot of Courtney making her first pass at the stolen zeppelin, throwing an egg from aback her jet engine-turned rocket; this was followed by the trio of mutant flying fire-breathing mountain goats appearing and breathing jets of fire at Noah's bird-bike. "An epic _air battle_ turned into an epic _fail_ when _Jasmine_ got caught in the crossfire of Trent's quest for revenge," the survivalist was shown getting hit first by the musician's stray egg and then the smoke from the reward he'd won, "costing _both_ of them their chance at winning." Trent's hovercraft was shown catching on to the mooring line of Jasmine's hot air balloon, causing it to light on fire while Jasmine hung on for dear life and the whole mess divebombed towards the lake.

" _Courtney_ fought for control," the host continued over a clip of the young woman crashing into the zeppelin's gondola and struggling with Alejandro over the briefcase of prize money. "Harold and _Noah_ fought with fire," he added over the scene of the two nerds leading the mountain goats around and using their flames to take out the zeppelin's engines before Noah realized that the wooden wing of his flying machine had caught fire as well. "And _Trent_ fought with his friends as they decided to give him the Hurl," Chris finished as Trent was shown arguing with Jasmine and Harold at the campfire ceremony, then getting hurled into the night sky.

The recap ended there, the scene cutting to a close-up of a pair of identical purple kites flying in the sky. "We're down to the Final _Four_ ," Chris said as the shot cut to him and Chef standing on the Dock of Shame with the ends of the two kite's lines. " _Who's_ goin' to the finals?" the host asked with a cheesy but excited tone, taking a pair of scissors out of his pocket. "And _who's_ gonna be _cut loose_?" he asked, reaching over and cutting the line to Chef's kite, then laughing as it flew away. "Haha, yeah, like that."

Chef scowled angrily at him, but Chris ignored it. "Find out right now, on Total! Drama! Revenge of the Island!"

xxx

(Fade to Opening Theme)

 _Dear Mom and Dad, I'm doin' fine;_

 _You guys are on my mind!_

 _Ya asked me what I wanted to be,_

 _And now I think the answer is plain to see!_

 _I wanna be...famous!_

 _I wanna live close to the sun!_

 _Well pack your bags, 'cause I've already won!_

 _Everythin' to prove, nothin' in my way;_

 _I'll get there one day._

 _'Cause I wanna be...famous!_

 _(Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

 _I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

 _I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

(Fade to Episode)

xxx

The music was light and airy as the scene opened on a trio of pink birds singing together on a tree branch...until a mutant squirrel leaned out from behind the trunk and zapped them with its eye lasers. They were burnt to a crisp, and flew away as the squirrel laughed cruelly to the camera.

The camera quick-panned down to the ground, where Jasmine and Harold were standing at the base of the tree. The survivalist pulled a knot tight in a rope and held it up, revealing the loop she'd made. "And _that's_ how you make a snare trap," she told her companion before holding another rope out to him. "Here, now you try."

Harold took it without question. "Thanks for all the survival tips, Jasmine," he said as he began to tie the same kind of knot that she'd just demonstrated. "But I gotta ask, why have you been making so many traps?" He motioned towards the camera, which pulled back to reveal no less than three snares lying around the ground.

"Oh, well, some of the larger mutants have been wandering closer to my sleeping tree recently," Jasmine explained with an almost embarrassed smile, "so I thought I'd lay down some...deterrents to keep them away?"

"I see," the shot zoomed back in on alpha nerd nodded in understanding, pulling his knot a little too taut and closing the loop around his wrist. As he undid his mistake, he said "Hey, uh, can I ask you a question?"

Jasmine, who had thrown the other end of her snare up over a higher branch and was now adjusting the rope, looked back at him and said "Sure, mate, just bark it out."

Harold nodded, but cleared his throat in a slightly nervous fashion before continuing. "Right. I just wanted to know if you're still onboard with us going to the finale together."

"Well yeah," Jasmine answered, not noticing the cheesy grin that immediately formed on Harold's face. "I mean," she snorted and smiled, "who _else_ would I wanna go with? Of course, we still have two more challenges before then. I think we should get Courtney out next, she's more athletic than Noah and she's honestly had it coming for awhile now. Although," she brought her hand to her chin in thought, "Noah _is_ a wily one. He's the one who found that invincibility statue, after all."

"Right, that reminds me," Harold perked up before looking around conspiratorially then drawing Jasmine in closer. "I have reason to believe that _he's_ been the one sending _notes_ all season," he whispered.

"No joke?" Jasmine asked in surprise.

"None at all," Harold said with a decisive nod. "I still need to gather some more proof, but I think I know just where to find it."

"Well okay then, that's one less thing to worry about," Jasmine smirked.

xxx

"It's pretty great that I still have Harold to count on even after everything that's happened," Jasmine told the confessional camera. "And not just because it's one less person I have to worry about trying to vote me off, either. Although...," she briefly brought a hand to her chin in thought before smiling sheepishly and pinching her fingers leaving a small gap between them, "is it bad that a _small_ part of me thinks I could beat him easily in the final challenge. I mean," she lowered her hand and her expression became more defensive, "he's got _brains_ , yeah, but he really doesn't have much in the way of physicality."

xxx

Noah opened the next confessional with an annoyed sigh. "Well, with _Lover Boy_ out of the picture I'm down my number-one ally. And since I have no intention on playing third wheel to King of the Dorks and Queen of the Outback, that means I'm pretty much forced to go crawling back to...," he paused and shuddered and sighed again, " _Courtney_."

xxx

The music plodded slowly as the scene moved to Noah walking up towards the lone cabin, where Courtney was eating a bag of chips on the steps. She quickly noticed him and shot a glare his way. "What do _you_ want?"

"Oh, uh, h-hey Courtney, fancy seeing you here," Noah opened with an awkward smile.

She sniffed haughtily. "Let me _guess_ ," she said. "With Trent gone, you need someone _else_ to help you take out Harold and Jasmine, right?"

Noah seemed to deflate a little. "Yeah, you, uh, you got me," he admitted.

Courtney stared at him. "...fine," she said after a moment, looking away and reaching back into her bag of chips.

"...really? Just like that?" Noah asked in surprise.

"Hey, it's not like I'm _forgiving_ everything you've done since the merge," she told him harshly, "and believe me, you have a _lot_ to make up for. But so long as you do _everything_ I say, then I'll help you get rid of the others."

Noah sighed again in light annoyance. "Yeah, probably should've seen _that_ coming," he said dryly before noticing Courtney's renewed glare and quickly transitioning himself back into an awkward chuckle. "Haha, _yeah_ , I'll just...see you at the _challenge_ ," he told her before scurrying off to the right.

Courtney watched him go, then made a haughty noise and resumed eating. It wasn't too long, however, before Harold walked up. "What is it now?" Courtney sighed in annoyance, looking up at the sky.

"Sorry for interrupting," Harold opened, "but I wanted to ask you a few questions about why you voted for Zoey back then."

"...what _kind_ of questions?" Courtney asked, her eyes narrowed in suspicion.

" _Important_ ones," Harold answered, puffed up with self-assurance. "Ones that could change the very fabric of the game as we know it!" he added dramatically.

His closed eyes did not see the sly smile that formed on Courtney's face. "Okay, tell you what. _I'll_ answer your questions, but _you_ have to help _me_ in return."

Harold's face fell, but he quickly steeled himself. "Very well," he declared. "I'll pay your steep price, for the sake of _knowledge_!" he said, striking a rather dramatic pose.

Though taken aback by his mannerisms, Courtney quickly put her sly smile back on. "Then ask away," she told him.

"Right," he nodded. "First, I wanna know if you had considered voting for someone else before you found that note that made you wanna vote Zoey."

Courtney was taken aback yet again, but quickly shifted into a thoughtful look. "Oh, well, if it hadn't been for that stupid _forgery_ I might have voted for Noah instead. But I don't get what-"

" _Yes_ ," Harold cut her off with a victorious fist-pump. "That makes _perfect_ sense!" Courtney just looked at him in wary confusion.

xxx

"If _Noah_ found out that Courtney wanted to vote him off back then," Harold explained to the outhouse camera, "then he'd have the perfect motive to change her mind by sending an anonymous note! And then for the other two...," he paused and rubbed his chin thoughtfully, "perhaps he went after _Justin_ because I said I was worried about him taking over the team. But I'm not really sure what the thing with _Leonard_ was about, but I guess it's still plausible for Noah to have both reason _and_ opportunity to send all three notes. Now I just have to decide what to _do_ about it..."

xxx

"Okay, that was weird," Courtney said, her hands on her hips as she looked towards the outhouse door. "But what _isn't_ with Harold?" she shrugged at the camera. "I can only guess that he thinks _Noah_ is the one who made that note, which..." she paused to think for a moment, " _actually_ makes a whole lot of sense. I guess I'll add _messing with me_ to the list of things he has to make up for, but other than that it doesn't really matter." she said, crossing her arms and smirking. "Both of them are at my beck and call now, which means that I'm _finally_ back on top where I belong. Jasmine's going home, and none of the others are going to get in my way."

xxx

"Challenge time!" Chris called out in an almost sing-song voice as the scene cut to him, Chef, and the Final Four standing just outside the communal bathrooms. "And since you've been abused so _flagrantly_ ," he said, walking past the wary four, "today's challenge is a super safe _fun_ challenge!" The campers began to smile and cheer in genuine excitement.

"Get ready for bubbles, flowers, and cotton can-" Chris continued, walking further away...and stepping in something unseen that caused him to yelp in shock and pain before being lifted into the air. The camera cut outward to show that he'd been caught in a snare trap attached to a tall pole that flung him in a high arc...and down through the roof of the bathroom.

The Final Four cringed in sympathy and disgust. "Uh-oh," Jasmine winced, "that was _my_ snare that just threw Chris into the dunny..."

The music became ominously deep as Chef raced to the bathroom door and opened it, quickly getting faced with the smells and noises coming from within. "Woo-eee!" he said, waving his hand in front of his face in disgust. "I need five interns and a fire hose! ASAP!" he called off-camera. "We'll get you outta there soon," he told the host.

Chris coughed and nearly wretched. "Those _ungrateful_ puppets just crossed the line!" he said from within the depths of the building. He took a breath, then continued with "Remember your _nasty_ challenges, Chef?" he asked, the shot quickly cutting to the Final Four as they shared a nervous look. "The ones that got the red lights?" he added as the music rose dramatically. " _Yeah_ , the light just turned _green_ ," he finished harshly.

Chef grinned, closed the door, and turned around. "I'll bring the _pain_ ," he said, punching his open palm and cackling evilly as lightning flashed, thunder cracked, and the music became higher and darker.

The Final Four gasped and cowered and turned their eyes skyward...only to see a bright sun and an almost cloudless sky. Though Chef kept laughing their fear soon gave way to annoyance, and the shot cut over to show that the ominous effects had been created by a trio of interns – a short young white woman with a high black ponytail switching a stagelight on and off, a young white man with long bangs waving a piece of sheet metal, and a young man of southeast Asian descent pulling a rope than raised and lowered a tarp above Chef.

After a few seconds, Chef finally lowered his arms and stopped laughing. "Okay, cool it," he told the interns.

/

The scene flashed ahead to a clearing in the woods, where each of the campers was standing behind what appeared to be portable kitchens made mostly of wood. "Listen up, _dirtbags_ ," Chef said as he approached from the right, the camera zooming slowly in as he walked past Jasmine, and then Noah, and then Courtney, and then Harold. "I'm gonna push you until you _break_. Then I'll take the filthy little _broken bits_ and give 'em another good breakin'!" He mimed snapping something in two with his hands as he finally reached the end of the line.

"No wimps are gonna make it to _my_ finale," he said solemnly before turning around to face Harold and roaring "Do you understand?" Harold gulped and nodded nervously. "First challenge," Chef continued, "the cook-off!"

" _Cooking_ ," Noah repeated dryly. "This better not be another challenge where we do _your_ job _for_ you," he said before getting hit with a frying pan and toppling over with a grunt of pain.

"Shut it, or _I'll_ shut it!" Chef told him, catching the frying pan as it spun back on the rebound. "Bring in the TD classic competitor!" he called to the left, and the camera cut backward and panned over to show none other than gentle giant DJ, blindfolded and bound by rope to a hand truck being wheeled in by a short, fat, and bespectacled east Asian male intern.

"Whoa, that's _DJ_ ," Harold said in mild awe.

Chef removed the boy's blindfold to reveal a look of panic in his eyes. "No," he moaned and squealed, "not _here_! Dawn told us it was _doomed_! I vowed _never_ to come back here!"

"Your contract _disagrees_ , dough-boy," Chef told him, holding up an official-looking stack of paper. " _You_ slime buckets are gonna cook somethin' tasty," he looked back and told the campers, "and _this_ bag of mush will be the judge," he dropped the contract to thumb at DJ. "You've got _twenty minutes_ to make a tasty lunch with whatever you find on the island," he turned the rest of his body away from DJ, and the camera moved to get Harold back in the shot. "I believe in eating _locally_ ," he admitted proudly as a few light notes played in the background. "Ready?" he asked the contestants with his usual harsh expression.

"Umm, excuse me," Courtney tentatively raised her hand, "will we have anything in the way of... _non_ -local seasonings?"

Chef just ran over to her with two frying pans in hand, shouted "Get cookin'!", and banged the pans together. Courtney flinched and yelped, then ran off with Harold right behind her as the music turned dark and tense.

/

Another flash shifted the scene into some part of the woods, where a three-eyed bear was casually scratching its back against a tree until it heard the panting and footfalls of someone approaching and ducked behind a large bush.

"Hah," Jasmine laughed as she finally entered the scene and stopped to catch her breath and look around. "A _foraging_ challenge? Seriously, they might as well just _hand_ the victory to me. I'm not gonna be beaten when it comes to finding food out here," she said as she started walking forward again.

She soon came upon a tree with several small glowing mushrooms growing out of the side. "See," she smiled, "already found something." She reached out to grab them, but stopped partway and frowned. "Actually, on second thought, those are _probably_ poisonous. No matter," she told herself, turning around and walking away. She quickly came upon what looked like a blueberry bush, but when she reached out to pick some a green tendril shot out and slapped her hand away, and the bush hissed at her.

"O _kay_...," she said, rubbing her hurting hand, "maybe foraging in a forest full of mutants _won't_ be so easy after all..."

/

The music trilled tensely as the shot cut to another close-up of small, glowing green mushroom growing on the bark of a tree. This time, however, they were soon scooped up by a hand that the camera cut outward to identify as Harold's. "Cool," he said as he looked at his gains, "these will make an excellent base for any number of dishes. Now if only I could find some kind of _grain_ ," he said, standing up straight and looking around.

He saw Noah approaching and stiffened up. "Hey, good buddy, how's it goin'?" Noah greeted with a smirk..

"...it's going productively, if you must know," Harold answered with a hint of wariness.

"Cool," Noah said. "So, I was wondering, what are your thoughts on the vote?"

"Well unless something happens I'm gonna vote for Courtney," Harold answered.

"Right, right," Noah nodded. "See, I've been doing some _thinking_ , and I wonder if we shouldn't vote off _Jasmine_ instead."

"Uh, why would I do that?" the alpha nerd asked with growing anger.

"Whoa, relax," the schemer said, waving his hands defensively. "Nothing against your girl, it's just that she's gonna be tough to beat in the finale. If we get rid of her _now_ it'll make things easier for us in the long run."

"Maybe for _you_ ," Harold retorted, "but _I_ have no reason to be afraid of going up against her." He turned his nose up and walked away, leaving Noah to scowl.

The shot quickly cut back to Harold, however, to show him looking back with a sly smile...before slamming headfirst into what the camera quickly zoomed out to reveal was a giant two-headed mutant rabbit. It roared at him, he screamed, and the music turned deep and ominous as he turned back and ran for his life.

/

The scene flashed to the communal bathrooms, where the female intern was now leaning against a pipe by herself with a cup of coffee in hand. "Helloooo~o?" Chris asked from inside the building. "Someone give me a hand! I'm almost _free_!" The intern just looked at her nails and whistled. "Uh-oh, oh no!" the host said in sudden alarm, the shot cutting in to the shocked intern as she listened to her boss slip on something and fall into something watery again.

"Whyyyyy?" he began to cry, earning a smiled from the braces-wearing intern. "Oh wh-h- _hyyyy_?"

She took a sip of coffee.

/

Another flash took the focus back to the woods, the camera stationed right behind a tree and catching Noah running past from the left with a pair of laser squirrels gnawing on his head, then Harold running by in the opposite direction pursued by the giant two-headed rabbit, and then Jasmine from the left again struggling with the attacking vines of an uprooted bush.

The camera panned up the tree trunk to Courtney, clinging to a branch with a bird's nest in it an watching the scene unfold down below. She snorted disdainfully, saying "Serves them _right_ ," before reaching out and grabbing the three eggs in the nearby nest. The shot zoomed out as she looked up, noticing the pair of bluebirds glaring at her.

She smiled sheepishly at them, but they quickly started to peck at her face and hands.

/

The scene returned to the portable outdoor kitchens with a close-up of Courtney, now covered in scratches and cuts and bruises, cracking one of the eggs she'd collected into a frying pan. "Let's see," she mused as she cracked another two eggs without looking at their contents, "an _omelet_ would probably be best...but I'll need some kind of filling..."

She rubbed her thin in thought, and quickly noticed Harold at his station a little ways in front of her. He had a fairly large bowl glowing green mushrooms on his counter, and as the camera cut in closer and he threw a few onto his frying pan Courtney suddenly popped up next to him. He gave out a startled yell.

"Hey, can I use some of these?" she asked smoothly, pointing at his mushrooms.

"Uhh...," Harold began hesitantly.

"You _did_ agree to do what I told you, remember?" she reminded him sternly.

He sighed and hung his head. "Fine," he relented.

" _Thanks_ ," Courtney grinned, scooping up two handfuls of mushrooms – about half the bowl – and darting off.

Harold sighed, and threw a few more of the remaining mushrooms into the pan.

A calm, lilting tune played as the shot cut to a close-up of a bottle of oil, the camera moving back to show it in the hands of Noah. With a pile of what looked like various plant parts on his counter and a smile on his face he spurted some oil into his pan.

It flamed up seconds later, earning a panicked gasp from Noah and a tense turn in the background music. Frantically, he picked up the pan by its handle and moved it under the faucet, turned the water on, and screamed again when it just made the grease fire flare up even worse. He quickly tossed the pan away entirely, and it exploded into a fireball just off-screen. The southeast Asian male intern promptly ran by carrying a boom bike, all of him scorched and flaming and yelling.

Noah winced in sheepish sympathy. "Yeah, maybe I'll just make a salad," he said.

xxx

"Yeah, so I'm not _exactly_ a master chef," Noah confessed. "I figured that even _weeds_ must be edible if you fry 'em up, but I _probably_ should've kept in mind the possibility of a grease fire. Whoops."

xxx

The static cut away to Jasmine, standing with a pile of red and blue berries and a pan at the ready. "Alright, these _shouldn't_ be poisonous but you never know with these mutants," she said as she scooped up a handful and looked at them more closely. She dumped them into the pan with an expectant cringe, but they merely sizzled. "Okay, they should be good for the tart," she said with a smile.

A pan to the left put the focus back on Courtney as she hastily diced the mushrooms she'd taken from Harold, then gasped at a small plume of smoke start to rise from the eggs she was cooking. She quickly used a spatula to move them around a bit, then let out a sigh of relief as the smoke stopped.

Next, the camera pulled back to show Harold in the foreground, then re-focused in on him. "Now that I don't have as many mushrooms, I should probably add something else to the quiche," he said as he idly stirred his pan of quiche filling. He looked up and away and rubbed his chin in thought for a moment, then smiled and snapped his fingers in realization. He quickly ducked down behind his counter and came back up with a three-eyed mutant frog in hand, and squeezed it so that a disgusting-looking pink slime spurted out of its mouth and in to the pan.

From there, a quick-pan back to the right showed Noah again as he calmly washed a pale carrot-like root in his sink, the rest of his gathered greens now in a bowl. He turned off the water, turned back to his bowl, and winced as a vine shot out of it and struck him in the gut, causing him to drop the root into the bowl. "Stupid mutant _vegetables_ ," he said bitterly, batting the vine back with a wooden spoon.

xxx

"I'll admit it," Jasmine told the confessional camera with a joking snort, "I don't really have a lot of experience with actually _cooking_ food. But it's hard to go wrong with berries, and I don't think the others will have anything spectacular either."

xxx

A lilting tune was playing as once again the static cut away to Jasmine, who was now pouring her cooked fruit mixture into a tart crust. She happily spread it out evenly with a wooden spoon, but as she turned her back on it to look at the others the shot zoomed in and the music turned ominous as it began to bubble slightly.

The music soon turned almost angelic, however, as the scene cut over to Harold as his oven dinged. With a pair of blue oven mitts over his hands he quickly bent down and took out his quiche. The shot cut in for a close-up of the dish, putting a radiant gold-and-orange background behind it to emphasize its rather picturesque quality – a few greenish spots in the crust, but otherwise a perfect unburnt brown.

The shot cut to Courtney staring in Harold's direction. She sniffed haughtily, then used a spatula to slide her finished omelet onto a plate. The camera cut to its overhead close-up, and a flatter version of the angelic tune that had accompanied Harold's creation played as the slightly-burned egg dish was shown against the same radiant backdrop. The perspective returned to a frontal view as Courtney looked down at her dish, went silent for a second, then shrugged.

/

"Three, two, _one_ ," Chef counted down as the scene faded forward to him standing at the ready with a nervous DJ still bound at his side, "spatulas down. Well, dish it up cupcakes! Move! Move! Move!" he commanded, and the camera zoomed out as the Final Four scrambled in to a line with their dishes in hand.

The music turned tense as the shot zoomed back in on DJ, Harold stepping up to him first. "Today, I present before you a _quiche_ ," the dweeb said, flourishing and bowing dramatically as he presented his dish to the bound giant.

"Mmm," DJ smiled, taking a whiff.

"...made from the _finest_ toxic mushrooms and with a _hint_ of frog," Harold finished, looking up with an expectant grin.

DJ yelped in alarm.

" _Next_!" Chef ordered.

Noah was next, the tense tune playing again as he stepped up and presented his bowl of greens...with a few larger black things scattered throughout almost like croutons. "How about a nice salad, big guy?" he asked with an almost nervous smirk.

The 'croutons' promptly stood up, revealing themselves as spiders as they crawled out of the bowl and on to DJ. The unwilling judge shuddered in fear.

"Or _not_...," Noah told him with a sheepish laugh before groaning and walking away.

He was replaced by Courtney, who watched her secret ally leave with an odd smile before holding up what she'd made so DJ could get a better look. "Well _I've_ just made a simple mushroom omelet," she said proudly.

The spiders now gone, DJ looked at the dish warily. "Looks a little _burned_ if you ask me," he said, immediately earning an annoyed scowl from Courtney. "Where'd you get the eggs from?"

"Oh, uh, from some bird's nest," Courtney answered, taken slightly aback by the question.

DJ looked at her in horror. "You stole some poor bird's babies?" he squeaked.

Courtney just gaped, taken aback even more. " _Next_!" Chef hollered, and Jasmine pulled Courtney away before stepping up herself.

"It's my first time making one," she explained as DJ raised a wary eyebrow at her tart, which was now bubbling quickly and ominously, "but I can guarantee my wildberry tart _won't_ hurt you."

The music spiked dramatically just then, and the bubbling tart erupt in a massive pillar of flame that made both Jasmine and DJ gasp in shock.

"...or not...," Jasmine said meekly before DJ started to scream.

"Mooommaaaaa!' he wailed, bursting his arms free of their bonds with ease and quickly untying his legs. He ran off with his arms raised in utter terror, leaving behind a wide-eyed Chef.

"Welp, looks like we just lost our taste-tester," he said, his expression returning to his usual gruff glare. "Rule change!" he called out as he looked back towards the campers. "You've gotta eat all of your _own_ weird grub."

"Urrgh...," Courtney and Noah said in disgust, while Harold gave an excited " _Yes_!" and Jasmine just gave a silent, shocked look at her tart – no longer flaming, but with a considerably blacker top.

"You hurl, you lose," Chef told them before the camera panned back his way. "Who's got guts of steel and who's gonna blast a barf bomb?" He asked it. "It's a throw-up throw-down, when we come back. On Total! Drama! Revenge of the Island!" An ominous chanting rose up in the background as he said the title with a grin.

(Fade to Commercial and Back)

"Alright, con- _pest_ -ants," Chef said with a light snicker as the camera slowly zoomed in from a long-distance shot of him standing behind the campers, who were now seated along on side of a wooden table with their dishes in front of them, "it's time to eat the disgusting crud you cooked up before the break!"

The shot zoomed in on Noah's salad, which still had a few spiders crawling in it. "Whoever finishes their meal _first_ , without spewing," Chef continued as the camera panned up to Noah's nervous face, "wins the challenge." He looked over at Courtney, who was also looking nervous. Chef laughed, and added "Man, this is gonna be _nasty_ ," as the ex-CIT looked down at her omelet and prodded it with a fork. It quivered oddly, and she gave it a look of disgust.

At the other side of the table, Harold looked excitedly down at his quiche while Jasmine cautiously prodded the charred top of her tart. "Well, it's not bubbling anymore, so that's _probably_ a good sign," she said.

She looked at Harold, and he nodded his agreement. "Whatever reaction caused that flare-up must've run out of chemical fuel, if you ask me," he said. "I'm pretty glad I didn't use any berries in my quiche. I seriously doubt the mushrooms and frog juice will have the same effect."

"Uhh, yeah," Jasmine said, eying his quiche warily, "though you might still have _other_ problems with it."

Harold raised a brow in confusion, but before he could say anything both he and Jasmine looked to the side. "Three, two, one," Chef counted down, the camera moving back to the middle to better show him standing between Courtney and Harold. At the end of his countdown he blew an airhorn, then yelled "Eat it!"

Courtney went first, cutting off a bit of her omelet, sticking it in her mouth, gagging, and forcing it down with a shudder.

Next was Noah, who began to cough soon after his first forkful of salad. He hacked up one of the same kind of spiders that had put off DJ, and glared at it as it scuttled away. "Seriously, were you in the _pipes_ or something and got in when I washed everything?"

The shot cut to Harold and Jasmine next, just as the dweeb was putting his first piece of quiche in his mouth. His eyes promptly popped open.

xxx

"Okay," he admitted sickly to the outhouse camera, "the frog was a mistake."

xxx

The music ramped up dramatically as Harold turned and vomited on the ground next to him, forcing Jasmine to pause as she ate to watch with concern. Harold's vomiting in turn caused Courtney to vomit, and even Noah as well. The music leveled off as quickly as it had arisen, and the footage skipped ahead to Jasmine finishing off the rest of her tart.

"Not bad," she said after her last swallow, wiping the last few crumbs from her mouth. "I guess what happened earlier was all just for show."

She burped out a small fire, but the music rolled up to a victorious tune nonetheless. "Challenge is over!" Chef declared, leaning over and raising the tall girl's arm. "Jasmine wins!"

The other three were shown groaning at the other end of the table with the remains of their dishes, and Harold put a hand over his mouth as he wretched again.

"That's why she doesn't have to wear one of these tracking collars," Chef continued immediately, the background score becoming slow and mysterious as he showed off the three metal collars hanging loosely on his left arm. A drum was struck as he threw each one in turn, and the shot cut back over to reveal that they'd locked around the necks of Noah, Courtney, and Harold.

"Challenge part two," Chef told them. "I give you...' _Dork_ Hunter'!" With an eager look on his face, he motioned to the GPS map he was now holding. A dramatic riff played as the camera zoomed in, showing something like a topographic map centered on the Dock of Shame. "The challenge is simple," he explained as the riff transitioned into a low underlying score and four red icons bearing the faint faces of the remaining campers appeared on the screen, " _you're_ the dorks, _I'm_ the hunter." A larger icon bearing Chef's faced appeared to the left of the four, and the map screen started panning upward with a dotted red arrow marking the way. "You run off into the woods, I hunt you down. First dork to the flagpole wins." The pan stopped a little ways after, and a large red circled 'X' started flashing on the screen.

" _Pray_ that you make it," the hulking man said, the camera finally cutting from the map back to him – and the bazooka he was now carrying, "before the Dork Hunter _blasts_ you into a _whole_ new dimension of pain!" The shot suddenly moved in for a close-up as he held up a can bearing his face on the label, along with a plate of spaghetti and meatballs with a fiery background. A calm, infomercial-like jingle started to play as he said "Rocket-Propelled Spaghetti Cannon. Featuring my _own_ special recipe," he loaded the can into the bazooka, "Chef Hatchet's In-Your-Face Extra Spicy Spaghetti." The shot cut back outward to show that he was now in the driver's seat of the show's jeep. "Dinner is served...in your _face_!" he said, becoming suddenly aggressive again and firing the cannon.

A massive ball of spaghetti and meat sauce shot forward, the four campers barely ducking in time. It hit the long-banged intern as he mowed the common area, sending him flying backward into a rock formation. "Aww! Aww! It burns!" he cried out in pain, pinned to the rock by sizzling-hot pasta.

Chef cackled in delight. " _Spicy_! You got twenty minutes to run, hide, and say your prayers," he said over a shot of the Final Four, who nervously turned from the intern to their tormentor. "Now move out!" he commanded, following up with another shot from his cannon that forced the campers to scream and scatter into the woods – Jasmine taking a path further into the woods while Courtney followed the boys down a way closer to the camera. A third shot of pasta landed on a rock separating the two paths, and Chef giggled.

/

The drama left the music as the scene flashed to the back of the communal outhouse, where all three male interns – including the one with long bangs – were now standing around.

"What's taking those interns so long?" Chris asked angrily, still stuck within the bathroom. The fat intern and southeast Asian intern snicked, but their companion – down on one knee in front of a pipe – quickly shushed them. "There's no _way_ they coulda forgot about me!" Chris yelled. "I _OWN_ THEM!"

As he roared, the banged intern raised a connecting hose out of the ground and hooked it to the pipe, and the southeast Asian intern opened the valve. After a few seconds of gurgling, Chris cried out in alarm. "More _sewage_?!" He took a deep breath, then screamed " _HEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLPPPPPP_!" as the music rose sharply.

/

The shot cut to a close-up of a few lavender-colored tulips, which were promptly covered by a stream of vomit. "Yeah," Harold said, clutching his stomach as he stood back up and wiped the puke from his mouth, "the frog was _definitely_ a mistake. Still," he added, straightening up with a wary look on his face, "I should probably get going before Chef comes and finds me."

He kept moving in a silence that was broken moments later by a flash and buzz from the woods in the background, which was followed by a pained yelp from a familiar voice. Perking his eyebrow in curious confusion, Harold turned and crept towards where the flash had come from.

The camera cut to show him stepping through a bush, then panned to the left to show Courtney frowning angrily at her tracking collar. She paused hesitantly, then grabbed it, only to receive an electric shock that made her yelp again.

"Yeah, something tells me that isn't gonna work," Noah said dryly, attracting Courtney's attention to her right as he walked over. "But hey, they say third time's the charm," he added with a dry smile that earned a frown from his ally.

"Hah hah," Courtney told him before the sound of a third, longer jolt from off-screen got their attention. They turned wide eyes to their left as Harold walked up, ending a screamed pain.

He quickly noticed their incredulous looks. "What? I wanted to know if all the collars worked the same way. You should touch yours to be sure."

"Yeah, not gonna happen," Noah told him. "Now if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna _leave_ before Chef drops in for some one-stop shopping."

He turned to leave the way he came and Harold did as well, but both were stopped in their tracks when Courtney grabbed their arms and gave them a sharp " _Wait_!" She let go of them as they turned back towards them with annoyance and curiosity on their faces, and she continued. "Instead, how about you two _smart_ guys put your heads together and figure out a way to remove these tracking collars?" She looked to Harold, who had raised a brow at her, and then to Noah, whose expression was more dull disbelief. "And...then we can slip them onto one of the mutants," Courtney quickly continued, "so that Chef goes after _it_ instead of _us_."

"That _would_ help us out," Harold pondered. " _And_ be really funny, too."

"Yeah," Noah countered, "too bad it requires us to _A_ ," he ticked off a finger on his left hand, "get these shock collars off with _out_ touching them, and B," he ticked off another finger, "put them onto something that probably wants to kill us. And both of those rank pretty high up on the list of things I _really_ don't wanna do today."

He turned to leave again, only for Courtney to immediately pull him back. "Oh no, you're _helping_ me," she told him sharply. "Because I can think of a lot of things _worse_ for you if you don't."

Noah stared for a moment, then groaned in annoyance.

/

"Seriously, did Chef not realize who he was up against when he decided to give us this challenge?" Jasmine asked herself, a broad smile on her face as she walked through the woods at a rather casual pace. "I mean, this is my _specialty_. Even _if_ I'd lost the cooking challenge I'd still ace this. But hey, I'm not gonna complain about finally getting an easy win." She paused to examine the trunk of a tree, then the leaves of a bush next to it before moving on with a snort of laughter.

"I can just imagine the look on his face when he gets to the flag to intercept me only to find that I already got there," she continued. "Though he'll probably go after the others first, just because they're easier targets. But hopefully not _too_ much easier, right? I don't wanna get too cocky and have him find me immediately after taking out the others," she added with a short laugh and an expectant look behind her that fell away when she saw nobody there. "...right," she reminded herself, "Harold's off somewhere else. I guess I didn't realize it before, but I've been getting kind of used to having him and the others around. I mean," she snorted another laugh, "here I am talking to myself because of it."

Her laughter trailed off again as she continued a few more seconds in silence. She paused at another tree, and reached up to grab the vines hanging from it. "Hard to believe there's only four of us left...," she said with a hint of sadness.

/

The music turned tense as the scene flashed back to Courtney, Noah, and Harold now walking together in another part of the forest.

"Have you two come _up_ with something yet?" Courtney asked in a mildly annoyed tone.

" _Gosh_ , it's not like we can just snap our fingers and make an electromagnetic pulse appear out of thin air," Harold told her as the shot cut in for a close-up. "Although it _would_ be pretty cool if we could," he added before snapping his fingers, then looking disappointed as nothing happened.

"Yeah, unless we get some actual _tools_ ," Noah chimed in as the camera panned up to him, "I don't think we're gonna get these collars off any time soon. Maybe _Bubble-Boy_ could've done it, but this just isn't my specialty."

"Well...don't expect you two can just get out of helping me because of it," Courtney told him, the shot moving to her as she lifted a low-hanging branch out of the way then lingering as she moved past.

"Didn't think I could," Noah said, a hand already raised to keep the branch aloft. "Though I don't get why _Wonder Boy_ agreed to help you in the first place." He briefly looked back at the nerd walking behind him and fiddling with a small twig. Upon hearing the nickname Harold looked up, which allowed him to see the low-hanging branch snap back down and hit him in the face.

He quickly brushed off the slight pain, however, and said "I could say the same for you. I know _I'm_ just repaying a favor, but I'm surprised _you_ decided to take Courtney's side after everything that's happened."

" _Really_ ," Noah deadpanned. "Even though you basically told me that you weren't on my side and didn't wanna vote out Jasmine."

"Are you still on that?" Harold replied in annoyed disbelief. "Why would I wanna vote her off? We have a bond of solid trust and _love_ between us."

Noah and Courtney shared a look of their own disbelief.

xxx

"Yeah, I think I'm just gonna get started on my next _note_ ," Noah told the outhouse camera, already holding a pencil and piece of paper. "Let's see," he said in thought, tapping the eraser end of the pencil against his chin, "what to write? I'll probably have to get _Romeo_ to realize his girl isn't in love with him and get mad enough to vote her off. Maybe set up some kind of...secret _meeting_ between them? Give him a fake love letter to get his expectations up," he began to write, "and then...send something to _Jasmine_ so she misunderstands?" He stopped writing, and scratched his temple with his pencil. "Hmm. This might be tricky."

xxx

The static cut away to a close-up of Noah looking thoughtful, and the camera quickly panned back to the left to show Harold grinning darkly. "What's the matter," he asked in an accusatory tone, "trying to figure out what to write-"

He was cut off when a large spaghetti blast shot past him accompanied by a solitary deep note in the background music. It was accompanied by another as the perspective moved behind the three, who quickly looked back in wide-eyed shock. "He _found_ us!" Harold cried out, a second shot flying past the three as the perspective returned to its usual side-on position and the music ramped in to a tense challenge theme.

The three turned and fled screaming, but the camera lingered in place long enough to see Chef arrive on his jeep, firing off two more wild shots from his cannon while cackling madly. "Better run, kiddies! The _Dork Hunter_ has arrived! Aaaa-hahaha- _haaaaa_!"

The shot quick-panned back to the three still running for their lives through the forest, dodging errant spaghetti blasts. "Okay, can we scatter now?" Noah asked.

Another pasta-ball sailed right by Courtney, close enough to make her yelp in shock. "No! You two need to cover me!" she shot back angrily at the boys.

Noah and Harold looked at each other in alarm. "Uh, come again?" Harold asked before Courtney suddenly grabbed him and Noah by the collars, whirled them around, and crouched down behind the human wall they formed. They were promptly hit directly by a spaghetti blast and cried out in pain, with Harold adding an anguished "It _burns_!"

"Suck it up and keep moving," Courtney told them harshly, standing up and pulling them by the arms so they were forced to keep running behind her. The three soon came upon a large tree that had fallen across the path, which Courtney easily leaped over – but Harold and Noah, still carrying painfully spicy pasta on their shirts, stumbled and got caught on top of it.

A combination of Courtney pulling them from one side and a pasta ball hitting their butts from the other was enough to force the two boys over the log, and the three soon got back to their feet. Another saucy projectile sailed over their heads as they ran off.

The music leveled off slightly as the camera panned back a little to the left, showing Chef coming to a stop right before the tree preventing further progress in his jeep. He stood up, glared angrily in the direction his prey had gone, and growled. " _No_ body gets away from _me_."

/

"Honestly, what am I even _doing_ reminiscing like this?" Jasmine asked herself as the scene flashed back to her, still walking through the woods but now carrying several vines looped over her left shoulder. "I should just focus on winning the challenge," she said while absentmindedly tying the vines into snares.

She stopped in her tracks suddenly, and the perspective moved behind her to show a checkered flag sticking out of a small hill with an alarm light on top. "Oh. Well," Jasmine chuckled awkwardly, "okay then, I guess that's that. Although," she said, her expression becoming troubled as she walked closer to the finish flag and looked around, "where _is_ everyone? I mean, I knew this was gonna be _easy_ , but I never thought it'd be _this_ easy." She paused and frowned. "Is it really okay for me to just win like this? I mean...I don't wanna _lose_ but I don't wanna completely dominate the others so they wanna vote me out even more."

"Like," she walked over to a nearby tree and rest an arm on it while she stared off with concern and worry on her face, "what if the others are all together? I wouldn't put it past Courtney to try and turn everyone against me, and if Noah's really the one who's been sending those notes then he'd probably go along with it. Could they _really_ turn Harold against me?"

She put a hand on her temple. "And am I more worried about losing his friendship because of it, or about him voting for me if I lose the next challenge?" She closed her eyes, and shook her head, and took a breath. "You know what?" she told herself, standing up firmly. "No. I'm not gonna get myself worked up about what might happen when I can just go look for them and see for myself."

She adjusted the vine-snares she was carrying, then turned around and headed back into the woods.

/

The scene flashed to a close-up of Chef's GPS map, showing only his own blinking icon. "Now where the heck did those three get to?" he grumbled, the shot cutting back to show him sitting in his jeep in a different part of the woods. He scrolled the map around with his finger, then stopped and smiled. "Hah! Those fools didn't even think to split up," he said, the shot cutting back to the screen to show Courtney, Noah, and Harold to Chef's south.

"Better sneak up on foot," he said with a sneaky snicker as he hopped out of the jeep, the pasta cannon strapped to his back. "I'll bag all three before they know what hit 'em, and then I'll take out the _tall_ one too," he said, chuckling darkly as he walked off into the woods.

The shot lingered on his jeep and the music turned eerie, and Jasmine leaned out from the shadowy forest background with a smirk on her face.

/

Another flash took the scene back to Harold, Noah, and Courtney as they collapsed to the ground out of breath.

"Okay," Noah said, "I'm pretty sure we lost him. Can we _please_ split up already?"

" _No_ ," Courtney replied, pushing herself back to her feet. "We're sticking together until one of us wins the challenge and that's _final_."

Noah snorted and began to stand up as well while Courtney cautiously moved on rightward. "Yeah, more like until _she_ wins the challenge, right?" he told Harold under his breath, the nerd already on his feet to his right.

"Don't get chummy with _me_ ," Harold replied with a sharpness that startled Noah. "I _know_ what you did!"

"Did _what_ , exactly?" Noah asked with a raised eyebrow as he brushed some dirt and a stray spaghetti noodle off his shirt. "You're gonna have to be more specific."

"I'm talking about the _notes_ ," Harold said, turning around and thrusting a finger at Noah's chest. "And don't _bother_ trying to deny it, I have proof."

"Gah!" Noah exclaimed, reeling in shock. "How did you...what possible proof could you _have_?"

"Well, your statement just now was enough of a confession as-is," Harold answered with a smug smile. "But I _also_ learned from _Courtney_ that she was planning on eliminating _you_ at first instead of _Zoey_ , meaning you had every reason to change her mind. And isn't it _convenient_ that after I told you how worried I was about _Justin_ -"

"Okay, okay, enough already," Noah griped, throwing up his hands and walking past his accuser. "I'll admit I wrote the stupid _notes_ , are you happy?"

"A little," Harold admitted as he started to walk forward again as well. "Although I _would_ like to hear an apology for all the trouble you've caused."

"Yeah, that would require me being _sorry_ about wanting to stay in the game," Noah said, looking back over his shoulder at Harold. "And guess what Sherlock, that isn't gonna happen!"

He promptly bumped into Courtney, and looked forward into her disapproving glare. "Would you two _geniuses_ keep it down?" she hissed at the boys before focusing on Noah. "We can talk about you _tricking_ me later," she told him, earning an almost sheepish smile that quickly turned into an annoyed scowl the moment she turned her back again. "Now come on," she said, waving for them to keep following, "we shouldn't be too far from the finish and I think we're in the clear."

A spaghetti shot hit the side of a tree right in front of her, shocking all three campers and causing the dramatic background score to resume. "Guess again, suckas!" Chef cried out, drawing the camera's attention to the tree branch he was standing in. He descended into a cackle as the three teens looked his way, and fired another shot.

Courtney yelped and grabbed Noah, forcing him up in to the path of the second pasta-blast so that it hit the top of his face and head. "Aaaagh! _Seriously_?!" the schemer screamed, clawing at the sizzling saucy pasta. "That wasn't even gonna hit us!"

"Like I was gonna take the chance," Courtney said, crouching with her human shield under the next blast, then tossing him to the side and grabbing Harold to intercept a third.

It hit him at waist level, causing him to holler in pain. "Aw-haw, my _meatballs_...!"

"Alright, just keep covering me while I go find the flag," Courtney said, letting go of Harold and standing back up.

"Yeah, how about you cover your _self_ for a change," Noah said angrily, wiping the remaining sauce away from his face as he stood up and started running

Courtney gasped indignantly. "Hey! You two said you were gonna do what I said!" Another shot sailing overhead forced her to start running as well.

"I changed my mind!" Noah called back to her as spaghetti blasts continued to sail through the air.

She gaped in shock as Harold, now free from his latest dish of pasta as well, started running along behind her. "Hey! Don't forget that you _need_ me Noah!" she yelled angrily.

"No, we need _each other_!" Noah yelled back, shocking Courtney enough for her to slow down, and Harold to pass her.

" _Hey_!" she called after him. "Not you too!" Harold looked back over his shoulder, then determinedly looked forward again.

Courtney gasped in indignation yet again. "YOU _OWE_ ME, HAROLD!" she roared just before taking a spaghetti shot to the back that launched her forward and plastered her against a tree.

Chef ran past cackling in glee, loading another can of ammo into his bazooka and firing the first shot off. "You can run, dorks, but you can't hide!"

The shot quick-panned to the right onto Noah and Harold, now running side-by-side for their lives into a more vine-filled section of forest. "Where's that stupid finish?" Noah cried. "We can't run like this forever!"

"We're done for!" Harold exclaimed dramatically before something above caught their attention, and the camera panned up to show Jasmine standing on a tall branch, vine in her hand and smirk on her face.

"Think again, boys!" she said, swinging down on her vine as a brilliantly heroic theme took over the background music. She whizzed past a pair of spaghetti blasts and landed a strong flying kick on Chef that knocked him back a few yards.

"I _knew_ you'd come save me!" Harold gushed in utter adoration while Noah watched with wide-eyed, gaping shock.

Jasmine smiled proudly and rubbed her nose. "Glad I didn't disappoint," she told him.

"Oh _really_?" Chef retorted, the music suddenly turning dark again as Jasmine looked back over to him standing up. "'Cause the way _I_ see it she's about to disappoint you in a whole new way!" He leveled his cannon in their direction, but the camera panned over to show Jasmine still smirking.

"I told you to think again, didn't I?" she quipped before tugging hard on the vine she'd swung in on.

Chef paused and raised his head in confusion, then noticed the vines in the bushes and trees around him start to shake. "What the?" was all he said before they all lashed out and coiled around him to form a tight cocoon, snapping all but one of the vines in the process. The final vine, leading into a bush in the background, was in turn suddenly and swiftly pulled to the right, whipping the trapped and screaming Chef forward. Jasmine quickly rolled out of his way, and when the last vine finally snapped Chef was sent hurtling down the path

The shot cut to Harold and Noah as they screamed and tried to flee, only to have the Chef-cocoon slam into them from behind. The camera zoomed in as they rolled forward together, only to zoom back out a moment later as they came to a stop...right by the finish flag, with Chef lying on top of Harold and Noah. The two boys gasped as soon as they noticed it and began to try and scramble out from under the heavy hunter...only for Jasmine to dash forward from the left, leap over them, roll forward as she landed, and spring back up and grab the flagpole with a smile on her face. The siren on top of it immediately began to flash and spin and sound for all to hear.

"Yes!" she cheered and pumped a fist as a drumroll transitioned the background music into a victory theme. "I _rocked_ that challenge!"

"And my _world_ ," Harold added dreamily, earning a groan from Noah. The shot cut to the edge of the clearing to show Courtney stumbling up, and leaning against a tree with a scowl on her face.

"Urrgghh... _fine_ , Jasmine wins immunity," Chef admitted reluctantly as he squirmed against his bonds. "Now would somebody get me outta this thing?"

/

A handful of drumbeats marked the transition to the marshmallow ceremony, the Final Four assembled on the front row of seats with Courtney furthest left, then Noah, then Harold, and lastly Jasmine furthest right. And although enough time had passed for the torches that ringed the area to be lit, Chef stood alone in front of the oil drum podium with his usual hazmat suit-strongbox ensemble.

"Elimination time, dorks!" he told the campers. "One of you is going home tonight, except for Jasmine, who has immunity." The shot cut to Courtney, crossing her arms and scowling at Noah, who met her gaze with a neutral look. A pan over showed Harold and Jasmine sharing an happy smile.

"Congratulations on winning," Harold told her. "You earned it."

"Thanks," Jasmine replied. "And sorry about letting you get hit by Chef.

"Zip it," the man in question interrupted, drawing the campers attention back to him as he held up four note cards. "Now to the votes," he said, looking down at the cards as the music turned tense and trilling. "We got one vote for _Noah_..."

" _What_?" the schemer replied in sudden, wide-eyed shock.

Courtney gave him a haughty smile. " _Sorry_ , Noah," she said in an oily voice. "But you see, I don't _need_ you to succeed in this game. In fact, I don't need _anyone_!"

"Would y'all shut up and let me read the votes?" Chef barked, the camera immediately cutting back to him. When no reply came, he cleared his throat and looked back at the ballots. "Now let's see...second vote goes to _Harold_."

The shot cut back to the Final Four, first showing Harold looking unperturbed before panning to Noah pinching the bridge of his nose in irritation, then looking at Courtney with a look of deep annoyance and hatred. "You're an _idiot_ , you know that right?" he told her, earning nothing but a disdainful huff in response.

" _What did I just say?_ " Chef interrupted again, angrier this time. The shot cut back to him, and he relaxed his posture and looked back at the ballots. "Third vote goes to _Courtney_...," he announced, causing her to gasp in shock. "And the _final_ vote goes to..."

The tension increased in the music as Chef purposely drew out his pause, and the camera cut from worried Courtney, to annoyed Noah, to confident Harold, and finally back to Chef.

" _Courtney_ ," he read.

"WHAT?!" she asked, standing up in sheer shock.

"Congratulations Princess, you just voted yourself out," Noah told her in a scathing tone.

"But...but..b-b-but Harold, you owed me a _favor_! For the information I gave you, remember?" she told the dweeb in desperation that quickly faded into rage. "That means _not_ voting for me!"

"Hey, I more than paid that back by helping you in the challenge," Harold replied with anger of his own. "If anyone owes a favor here, it's _you_."

Courtney just gaped at him in outrage before the Toxic Marshmallow of Loserdom was thrown her way; she caught in instinctively, but fumbled it from hand to hand when it scorched her until she finally let it drop onto the ground.

xxx

"I can't believe it!" Courtney told the outhouse camera, gaping in blank-eyed shock. "Those little rats! I...everything I've _done_...," she slowed down, became quieter, and her mouth fell into an expression of anguished horror as she looked at her trembling hands, "...it was all for _nothing_..."

xxx

"Yeah, I don't really have any qualms about voting Courtney out even though I _did_ promise to help her," Harold calmly confessed. "I mean, you saw how she was acting. She totally crossed the line, and she's pretty much had this coming for a long time anyway."

xxx

Jasmine opened the next confessional with a jovial snort. "Okay, so maybe my win was a little too flashy. But who cares? It was _fun_ , and so was watching Courtney's elimination. If I've got a bigger target on my back now then I'll just deal with it."

xxx

Noah began his spot with a long, deep, and thoroughly annoyed sigh. "And there goes _my_ last chance of getting into the Final Two. Thanks a bunch, Court."

xxx

The music turned sombre as the static cut away to the Hurl of Shame, Courtney sitting indignantly in the bucket with Chef grinning cockily next to her and the Final Three watching a little way up the dock.

"I've been _waiting_ to be the Hurl Master of this game," Chef said eagerly.

"And you're gonna keep waiting," Chef said, descending to the dock on his jetpack to the shock of Chef and Courtney.

"Chris?!" the Final Three said together in shock.

"Yup," the host replied with his handle on the catapult's lever, "I'm the Hurl Master around here! You see Courtney," he addressed the loser, "the Hurl of Shame is both shameful, _and_ painful. And right now, I can't think of anything that fits that more for you than the knowledge that you brought this on yourself when you decided to have your pal Gwen voted out."

Courtney's face fell into an expression of anxious defense. "That-"

She was launched into the night before she could finish her sentence, her words fading into a scream.

"Chris, good to have ya back, man," Chef told the host, walking over with a slice of glowing green quiche on a plate. "I even saved you some quiche," he said, putting a hand on the smaller man's shoulder and smiling.

"Chef, you _are_ the man," Chris grinned, wiggling his finger in anticipation before swiping the quiche and shoving it into his mouth in one piece. He gulped it down quickly...but quickly wretched and vomited into a hole in the dock because of it.

Chef smirked. "You _are_ the Hurl Master, hehe," he said as the series' capstone theme began to play.

"Who will be Hurled next," Chris said sickly, holding his stomach and looking distressed. "How much are they gonna _hurl_ before _we_ hurl them? And when will I stop _hurling_?" he asked, putting a hand over his bulging mouth before bending over and puking again. "Find out next time,' he stood back up and said, "on Total! Drama! Revenge, of the Island!"

The sound of him vomiting again was heard over the final long-distance shot of the island.

(Fade to Credits)

* * *

 **Author's Note - Post Script**

And thus, as so many of you expected, Courtney falls - and to her own anger and arrogance to boot. In case you're a little confused as to what exactly everyone's reasoning with the vote was, here's a more in-depth in-story behind-the-scenes explanation: Harold, Jasmine, and _especially_ Noah were expecting Noah and Courtney to put their differences aside and vote for Harold, while Harold and Jasmine voted for Courtney as she was the bigger threat. In that case it would be a tiebreaker, and with Courtney and Harold being who they are they would both be confident in their win.

Courtney, however, had other ideas. Angry at Noah for abandoning her while having the nerve to suggest that _she_ needs _him_ and not just the other way around, on top of every other slight he's dealt her over the season, led to her voting for him instead of Harold to send a message. And since she was under the impression that Harold would be guilted/intimidated into voting for Noah instead of her, she was fully expecting a 2-1-1 split in the vote with Noah going home. But, of course, Harold was having none of that, and stuck with the plan he and Jasmine had already created and voted out Courtney. And thus, as Noah said, Courtney effectively voted herself off.

And then, of course, Harold finally revealed Noah as the note-sender...only for it to basically go flat. Courtney had other priorities at the time; Jasmine wasn't around; and though surprised Noah didn't really cave to Harold's anger or anything. Of course, that's not to say this revelation won't have other effects in the game...

And that's that. Jasmine got a dominating win in a challenge that was heavily tilted in her favor even considering the fact that she sent Chris flying into a bathroom...but hey, that's a consequence of me not wanting to significantly change the challenge. I hope you enjoyed it nonetheless, including the cook-off portion of things.

Let me know what you thought, and what you're expecting in the episodes to come!

\- Fangren

* * *

 **Appendix: TSROTI Eliminated Contestants**

Cody - (13th Place)

Izzy - (RETURNED | Formerly AWOL)

Leonard - (12th Place)

Justin - (11th Place)

Lindsay - (10th Place)

Cameron - (9th Place)

Izzy - (Tied for 7th Place | Mutated, but captured)

Gwen - (Tied for 7th Place)

Zoey - (6th Place)

Trent - (5th Place)

Courtney - (4th Place)


	12. Chapter 12 - The Enchanted FrankenForest

**Author's Note**

Here we are at the penultimate episode of Total Shuffled Revenge of the Island, dear readers! All that's left to be written with this season are the two endings on Saturday, and then it'll be on to Total Shuffled All-Stars the day after. I hope you're excited for it like I am, but I also hope this doesn't distract from the final two episode of season four.

It's time to answer the reviews.

 **CVluvFoxy:** Thanks! With a character as controversial as Courtney it's always nice to hear that someone who doesn't like them found my portrayal of them more bearable. I'm glad you enjoyed Noah scrape by another week, and that you liked the rehash of DJ's cameo. I hope you're ready for the exciting semi-finals!

 **DSX62415:** Yup, so much happened last week and so much more is gonna happen this week and next. I hope you enjoy how everything plays out.

 **moka evans:** Is it? My impression of Courtney's canon losses is that they were more a result of her just being a bad combination of unbearable to have around and difficult to face in challenges. But regardless, to the joy of many she's now out of the competition. Let's see, what else...well, for starts, Harold's quiche was in fact disgusting as he ended up using the same frog juice as Scott did in canon. And honestly, there just wasn't any reason to have a Zoey-like sudden change in character, so I figured what happened with Jasmine would be good enough a replacement. Other than that, I hope you enjoy these last two episodes!

 **Animation Adventures:** Haha, you and like every other reviewer by the sound of it. And yeah, Jasmine owned up to being the source of the snares...but she also didn't get Hurled alongside Fang as punishment for it, like Scott did. And her tart lighting on fire was basically the only thing I could think of for her dish going wrong, which is kind of necessary in order for the cook-off to become an eat-off. She's not the type to willingly feed someone food she knows is poisonous, and I needed something dramatic in order to scare of DJ, so...flaming reaction from the mutant berry juices. And yeah, there not being a whole lot of immediate fanfare regarding the note revelation just made the most sense to me. Not just because Noah's an under-the-radar type, but also because there were only three of them in the first place and Noah had nothing he felt guilty over. He didn't really want people to know about them, but that didn't mean the others would be especially shocked by the reveal, if that makes sense. Oh, and Dawn's prediction was absolutely about the inevitable fall of the island - I figure that she's a year older than in canon and has a lot more experience, so maybe she can predict the future a bit better.

 **Gage the Hedgehog:** Thanks!

 **Tokusatsu-31st Century:** Oh ho, well, you'll see who makes the finale soon enough. I hope you enjoy what happens...

 **acosta perez jose ramiro:** Yup, quite a bit of karma catching up to them. Well, moreso Courtney than Noah, but still. Thank you for the review, as always!

 **bruno14:** Thank you for the praise regarding Courtney's portrayal and development this season. She didn't exactly...enjoy herself, I think, especially to the end, but she did a fairly good job this season. I'm glad you enjoyed the terrible food they made, and the challenge in general, and I hope you enjoy not only the end of this season, but the next as well. And like you said, just about anything can happen in this series.

 **Guest:** Pfft, I'm not even entirely sure who the main antagonist is this season and I'm the one writing it. It's just a result of the cast, I think - compared to the first Shuffled generation, nobody is especially villainous. And since the most villainous one was also the first antagonist to be eliminated, it's only natural that the main antagonist be a little vague. Although since Noah did last longer, I suppose he's the one who should get the title. And while Jasmine certainly did extremely well last week, that was more a case of it finally being a challenge that worked to her strengths. I did hear about Tyler and Lindsay's break-up a while ago; it's a little odd that they'd just announce such a thing, but whatever. I like them as a couple, but I'm fine with them not being one as well. And as for your TSRR...while I would like to shuffle up the teams in order to make things more interesting on the off-chance that I ever actually decide to cover the season, I'd prefer to just wait until another season or two of TRR is produced.

 **ashDanLand:** I know, it's so weird having only three people left when in past seasons this would still be pre-merge. And yeah, Courtney's pretty odd herself, at least in terms of how people feel about her. And you're right in that while Harold did want to get rid of Noah, he wanted to get rid of Courtney more...

 **Sarcasm is a Habit:** Thanks! Honestly, I never even considered Jasmine as being the one who left last week - for as long as I've known who the Final Four would be, it was gonna be Courtney who got the episode 11 boot. But Jasmine's cockiness leading to a boot last week...I can see it happening, even if I still wouldn't have gone with it. Anyway, I hope you enjoy the series of events that will decide the Final Two this week.

 **Alice Queen of Madness:** Ahh, well, as happy as I am to see a Courtney fan, everyone has to see one of their favorites go at some point. But nevertheless, I'm glad you're enjoying how this season is wrapping up, and I hope that holds true for these last two episodes.

 **Glowing Insanity:** Haha, I'm glad you enjoyed Courtney and Noah and Harold's ultimately fruitless attempts at escape, and just the second challenge in general. It was a bit weird for me to work everything out with no Zoey around to have a dramatic character shift and then mess with Chef a bunch, or even the Scott-Fang rivalry. But it looks like most of my reviewers enjoyed what I came up with, so I'm happy. And yeah, Courtney's time had definitely been coming...but as for what lies in her future, I'm afraid I can't quite reveal it yet. But regardless of how it goes down for her, or for the end of the season in general, I hope you enjoy it and I look forward to your thoughts and reaction.

 **PizzaTheBomb:** Yeah, Courtney's elimination wasn't meant to be incredibly surprising, or at least her receiving votes wasn't meant to be. But the exact method behind her elimination is something I'm pretty proud to have come up with; it's incredibly in-character, and also saves me from having to write a tiebreaker. Interesting predictions, as always, and I look forward to seeing your reaction to the Final Two.

 **The Prime Writer:** Ahaha, yeah, Chris' canning was kind of a pain to describe in writing but it was well-deserved on his part. Similarly, Jasmine got a well-deserved win in a challenge that she was basically destined to dominate in. And Courtney...well, she chose her path and saw it through to probably the worst end for her: a loss rendering all her actions that she may regret as ultimately fruitless. Courtney is a complex character, and with the timeline being as it is she may never really have her anger build up like it did in canon, meaning she'll never go as far down the path of darkness as she did originally. And as for the consequences of Noah's note-leaving having been found out, and how it all plays into this week's episode...well, read on and find out. I look forward to hearing your thoughts. Oh, and while I cannot quite recall what your TDR series is about, I am certainly willing to take a look at the cast you've got lined up.

 **Knifez:** Hey, there long time no see from one of my most critical reviewers. Glad to hear you've still been reading. As for your reviews...well, I'm a little disappointed in what you said regarding Lindsay, though I may be reading more negatively into it than you intended. Regarding episode 8's elimination...well, I can certainly understand your complaint about my tendency to eliminate most late-game returnees fairly quickly, though at least there's no other time for that to happen. I will stand by the method of double elimination in general, though, because personal convenience or no I do want some substantial differences between this series and canon that go beyond simply having a different cast. Plus I don't think I would've been able to get rid of Gwen in the standard fashion, as even with the idol in play it would require somebody to actually want to vote for Gwen, which just wasn't gonna happen with Trent/Courtney/Noah as the other team members. Even Izzy wouldn't do it, I think, as Courtney would try to rope her into voting off Trent or Noah. And speaking of Trent, while I would have been able to make his elimination work, I wanted to give him a chance to be in the story without Gwen - we've seen Gwen without Trent in canon, so I figured I could do the reverse in my story. I'm fine if you didn't quite like how his arc played out, and that it could've been done better by Gwen, but I stand by my decision regardless.  
As for Harold and Jasmine, I will express my disappointment that you don't like them, but with so little left in this season and you unable to really figure out exactly what you don't like, there's nothing I can do to change things. So sorry about that. I will accept your criticism regarding her actions during the second part of last week's challenge; in hindsight, I think it would've been better to keep the introspection and such basically the same, but have her decide to grab it anyway even if she's a little off-put that nobody else is there. And then she'd probably end up just uprooting the flag or something and taking it with her as she went to figure out where the heck the others were. Then she'd probably incorporate the flag into her victory over Chef, like maybe throwing it into his cannon to gum it up or something.  
And as for the finale...well, I will say that you're the only reviewer I've seen that's out-and-out advocated a Jasmine vs Harold finale, especially over Jasmine vs Noah. Which is actually something I'm a little surprised on, and I might talk a little bit about why in the Post Script. But anyway, I hope you enjoy what I've decided to go with for this penultimate challenge!

 **P. T. Piranha:** Yeah, that was pretty much my thinking - if people have been calling her a challenge threat, then she needs to actually win a challenge. It's like a 'Show, don't Tell' thing, you know? And I agree that Courtney is a pretty interesting character to write; she's had a ton of development in canon, and while it hasn't all been for the best (or entirely...consistent, I guess?), it's still made her a pretty deep character with a lot of possibilities in a reboot AU like this. And Noah did probably figure he'd get found out eventually, but as long as he got Harold and Jasmine mad at one another it might be worth it. The worst case scenario was that it would cause them to vote for him instead of Courtney, but he wasn't expecting Courtney to vote for him as well so he would've expected at least a tiebreaker.

 **StayOuttaMyShed:** Haha, yeah. I'm glad you enjoyed the voting strategy last week; it just goes to show how different Noah and Courtney are. Also glad you enjoyed the whole confrontation between her, and Noah, and Harold...  
And yeah, the warning that DJ was referring to was indeed about the island sinking, even if Dawn likely doesn't know that it's specifically that. And also, I will confirm that DJ, Dawn, and Sammy won't be in the cast next season; there's just nothing left to do with them, like you said.  
You know, even though I wasn't really intending on the parallels you pointed out when deciding this season's final three, I actually kinda like them. Especially because there's still a lot of differences between these three and Cameron/Lightning/Zoey to make things a little...uncertain, and interesting. Surprisingly, Knifez has expressed a preference towards a Jasmine-Harold finale, so your assessment of which potential Final Two would be most well-received is a little off.  
And as for Trent and Harold's broken friendship...while I can't spoil much, I will say that I do know how it's gonna be resolved. I hop you enjoy it when it comes to it, as well as the final two episodes of this season and the cats I've chosen for next!

 **OMAC001:** Well, who knows? A lot of things can happen at this point.

 **Explorer of the Unknown:** Ooh, yeah, that would've sucked for him. But, then this show would be out of a host, and I can't have that. I'm glad you enjoyed Jasmine's win and moments of sentimentality; it's nice to include things like that when I get the chance to have a character alone and unstressed. And yeah, I think you've described Courtney's situation well. She took it upon herself to influence Izzy's vote in hopes of securing more power for herself in the form of being Gwen's primary ally, only for Izzy to decide to vote for Gwen instead of Trent. And this in turn caused everyone to turn against Courtney, causing her to be more forceful with her attempts at regaining and expressing power, which in turn caused her to outsmart herself and get voted out.  
I will tell you outright that Dawn was referring to the sinking of Wawanakwa next season, although I don't think she specifically knows that's what's gonna happen - she just knows the island is doomed. Other than that, interesting predictions as always - both in terms of this week's episode, and next season's cast. I don't find it at all presumptuous to state what you're expecting the cast to be, though, merely interesting because I know exactly how accurate they actually are.

 **VIPGuest:** Is that so? Well, I'm glad to keep you on your toes...

 **FOWLKON:** Hmm, well, not much to say other than you have a good point about Jasmine - she hasn't really been central to a lot of the plots, but she's always been a pretty strong contender. I look forward to seeing your reaction to this week's episode.

 **I. M. Poik:** Yup, figured I'd get that sort of reaction from you. I am a little surprised you expected Noah to be eliminated here, although it does make sense considering the notes revelation. But, ultimately, Jasmine and Harold had a bigger fish to fry. And honestly, you're exactly right with it not making sense to have anyone snap like Zoey did - it didn't really suit any of the Final Four to get pushed into a dramatic character shift. I could see Courtney getting angry about getting bested by Chef, but that's about it. And I hope you enjoy who the final two end up being, and how they get decided this week.

 **Star Saber21:** Hah, well, sometimes a character just has to completely own a challenge, you know? And even though Jasmine isn't the best cook, she has a strong stomach and a good sense for foraging ingredients. And yeah, Courtney hasn't exactly made a good reputation for herself, either in this series or in canon...

 **Jaspher 4 Me:** Haha, yeah, it's been a long time coming, hasn't it? Same with Courtney's exit. And you're right about this week's episode being quite dramatic in canon, and you'll soon find out how accurate that prediction of yours is.

 **link9753:** Yup, Noah's not exactly in a good position...but you'll see soon enough whether or not he'll be able to make it past the episode. Interesting cast prediction for next season, and I hope you enjoy what my choices end up being.

 **wifishark:** Thanks! Considering how divisive a character Courtney is, I'm glad you enjoyed my portrayal of her this season. She's an interesting villain when given the opportunity. And as for Noah...well, as I've told a few other people, you'll find out how he fares soon enough.

Phew, that's taken care of...for now, at least. As I'm sure you all know by now, the **_poll in my profile will remain up until the start of next season,_** despite me admittedly forgetting that it exists a few times by now, and **_a TVTropes page for this series exists_** , and as per usual with such things, could always use more work. I thoroughly appreciate those who've already been working on it, and look forward to seeing what you all add next.

And I totally forgot to include this last week, but here's who's left if you need a reminder:

Girls: Jasmine

Boys: Harold, Noah

The Final Two are about to be decided, folks, so get ready! And most importantly, enjoy.

\- Fangren

* * *

 **Episode 12 – The Enchanted Franken-Forest**

"Previously, on Total Drama Revenge of the Island!" Chris opened over the standard sunny shot of Wawanakwa. "I took some time off, for personal reasons that I'd rather not discuss," he said with a feigned calmness, the recap beginning with him stepping into Jasmine's snare and getting flung into the communal washroom while the campers cringed. "Hey! Who edited that in there?" he asked in rising aggravation as Chef was shown opening the bathroom door, then wincing in disgust. "Not funny guys!" Chris said, and the montage cut to the Final Four standing at the long table about to eat the 'local' dishes they'd created.

"Okay, that's better," the host said as Chef blew his airhorn and Courtney gagged down the first bite of her omelet. "Chef led the Final Four players in a _revolting_ cook-off," Noah was shown puking up his salad, then Harold vomited both on the ground by the table and over a few tulips, "which resulted in _Harold_ upchucking 30% of his insides."

"He _also_ got to the bottom of the nefarious notes," Harold was shown talking with Jasmine and then Courtney before the challenge, "and called out _Noah_ to surprisingly little effect." The schemer was shown admitting his authorship of the notes, then bumping into an annoyed Courtney, with all three getting interrupted in turn by the return of Chef.

"Meanwhile, Jasmine set off alone and _struggled_ with her concerns about intimidating the others by winning the challenge," the survivalist was shown walking through the woods alone and talking to herself, then spotting the finish flag, "only to go back and win in an incredibly flashy manner anyway," the host added over shot of Jasmine confronting and trapping Chef, then leaping over him, Noah, and Harold to touch the flagpole.

"And despite Courtney's deals with the boys that put her back on top of the game," Courtney was shown using Harold and Noah as human shield repeatedly throughout the second part of the challenge, "her own anger got the better of her when she betrayed Noah and got herself voted out because of it." The recap ended with Courtney being abandoned by the boys, snidely revealing her betrayal, then gaping in shock and anger as she was voted out.

"Which leads us _to_...!" Chris continued with rising excitement...until the footage went back to him getting swung into the communal washrooms, the clip repeating over and over and over. "Hey! No! Nnno!" he said in growing alarm, the camera zooming out to show the footage being played on a widescreen television watched by Chris on the Dock of Shame. He gripped the arms of his deck chair, then stood up and shoved the TV cart into the lake with a grunt of "Not funny!"

"That editor is _so fired_ ," he said, turning his back on his shame and dusting his hands off. "Ten players down, three to go!" he told the camera, putting his usual smile back on. "Only _two_ will move on to the final round," he thrust two fingers up close to the camera and pulled them back a second later. "Who will be left standing? Find out, right now! On Total! Drama! _Revenge_ , of the _Island_!"

xxx

(Fade to Opening Theme)

 _Dear Mom and Dad, I'm doin' fine;_

 _You guys are on my mind!_

 _Ya asked me what I wanted to be,_

 _And now I think the answer is plain to see!_

 _I wanna be...famous!_

 _I wanna live close to the sun!_

 _Well pack your bags, 'cause I've already won!_

 _Everythin' to prove, nothin' in my way;_

 _I'll get there one day._

 _'Cause I wanna be...famous!_

 _(Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

 _I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

 _I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

(Fade to Episode)

xxx

The episode opened on the sole remaining cabin, but quickly cut inside to the boys' room to show Noah and Harold in turns as they woke up and locked eyes.

"Good morning, _traitor_ ," Harold greeted his roommate.

"Right back atcha, _slick_ ," Noah shot back.

" _Mind-tricker_!" Harold said harshly, sliding off his top bunk to the floor.

" _Drama queen_!" Noah replied, dropping to the floor as well.

xxx

"Seriously, the guy's been acting like me tricking a couple people in self-defense somehow makes me the new _Alejandro_ ," Noah complained to the outhouse camera. "Heck, the only 'bad' thing I've done is get Zoey voted out! I mean, yeah, I'll admit I _am_ gonna try and break Harold and Jasmine up," he quickly conceded, "but that's still just me trying to get a chance at _winning_ this stupid show."

xxx

"It's not just the fact that he got Zoey eliminated that I'm mad about," Harold explained in his own confessional. "It's also how he did it. I mean, messing with people's heads is pretty bad, even _if_ Justin and Courtney deserved it." He paused to stare blankly for a moment, but quickly shook it away. "More importantly, it really reflects poorly on his character. I mean, I used to think Noah was pretty cool, but how can I ever trust him again now that I know he's been sneaking around?"

xxx

"How can I ever _trust_ him again now that I know he's been sneaking around?" Harold repeated as the scene moved to outside the mess hall, the camera once again cutting inside after a few moments. Harold was now seated across from Jasmine at the end of the door-ward table with his back to the window, a single boiled egg in an egg cup before each of them. "How can I trust _anything_ when it might be him trying to turn us against each other?" He slumped forward, his head in his hands and his elbows on the table.

"I guess...all you can do is trust your instincts," Jasmine told him. "Or your gut, whichever works," she added after a moment of thought. "The point is, he can only get to you if you let him. I have faith that you'll do what's best," she said, smiling and putting a hand on his shoulder, "and as long as we trust each other there's not much he can do to beat us."

Harold sat up straighter, though his head was still bowed. "I know," he sighed. "It's just that every time I look at him he looks like he's up to something," he said, motioning behind Jasmine and causing her to look over her shoulder.

The perspective changed to show Noah sitting at other table, his back to the kitchen as he focused on repeatedly trying to crack the shell of his egg with a spoon, growing more frustrated with each failed attempt. "See?" Harold said from behind the camera. "I bet he's imagining beating us up or something. I have a sixth sense when it comes to people thinking about beating me up." Now scowling in anger, Noah picked up his uncracked egg and slammed it on to the table...only for it to ricochet off and hit Chef in the side of the head as he walked past the open counter carrying a stack of dirty plates and dishes. The titan was felled with a startled cry, with another weaker one to follow as the dishes crashed down on top of him. Noah, gaping in wide-eyed shock, quickly closed his mouth and inched away to the right.

Jasmine snorted and smiled as the shot cut back to her and Harold. "Sorry," she told her friend as she turned back to face him, "but I think he's thinking about _other_ things right now. Like probably...him _self_ getting beaten up by an angry Chef."

Harold blinked. "Well, there's no reason it can't be both. I mean gosh, Noah's a smart guy, he can probably think about like ten different things at once."

"Then I guess we'll just have to think of eleven," Jasmine told him, still smiling. "But seriously, mate, between _your_ smarts, _my_ strength, and _both_ of our skills, we're practically unstoppable. As long as we stick together and make sure the only thing either of us has to do with Noah is beating him in the challenge, we won't have anything to worry about."

Harold sighed again, but smiled. "You're probably right," he told her, clasping her hand. "Honestly, I don't know _what_ I'd do without you around to help make things clearer for me."

Jasmine snorted with laughter again and clasped her free hand around his. "Glad I could help ya, mate. That's what friends are for, right?"

Harold's smile seemed to falter for a moment, but he nodded all the same and broke the clasp. "Yeah. Just don't think that means I'll go easy on you in the grand finale. I'm like totally the guy to beat."

Jasmine smirked. "Wouldn't have it any other way," she said, and they slapped five and clasped hands again, more firmly and above the table.

The perspective moved across the room to show Noah watching them, then shifted again to his front as he grunted and scowled.

xxx

"Yup, playing dirty is still looking like my best bet," Noah confessed, "though I should probably be more _direct_ than I'd originally planned. But I can't really afford to pull any punches if I want a shot of beating our resident _Dynamic Duo_."

xxx

"I'll admit that I'm a _teensy_ bit more worried about Noah than I let on," Jasmine admitted. "I just don't want Harold to think I don't trust him, since it'd only make things worse for us."

xxx

A deep note led into a softly blaring theme as the scene cut to the sun, then panned down to Harold, Jasmine, and Noah standing before Chris on a path through a rather unusual stretch of forest. The host was standing to a tall flower with a drooping, slender, vase-like orange bulb.

"Finalists!" he opened as the music became tenser and deeper. "Welcome to, the Mutant Forest of _Terror_!" The camera cut around to show the path leading past giant, spiked, and tentacled mushrooms, prickly vines, and thorny, almost rock-like plant spires. A massive housefly flew past from one direction, and a laser squirrel scampered across the path from the other.

"Whoa, _awesome_ ," Harold said looking up in awe and taking a few steps back to the side. He stopped when faced with a sudden jet of steam erupting from the ground, and the earth below his feet soon crumbled into a steamy sinkhole with an eerie green glow. He screamed as he fell, but Jasmine quickly grabbed his arm.

"Oh yeah," Chris said as the survivalist glared at him and the camera cut to the bubbling pool of liquid waste at the bottom of the hole, "watch your step! Biohazardous sinkholes: they put the _mutant_ in 'Mutant Forest of Terror'." The shot panned up to Harold as he looked down in terror, only to cry out suddenly as he was lifted back up by Jasmine.

He let out a breath of relief as she happily set him back on the ground. "Wow, thanks," he said. "Who knows what that would've done to me!"

"They're also where Chef gets his Marshmallows of Toxic Loserdom," Chris continued, the sound of a fishing line being reeled in drawing the camera's attention to the hulking man in question, now dressed in his hazmat suit as he fished a glowing green marshmallow out of another sinkhole. "One of _you_ gets to eat that later!" Chris said with delighted anticipation.

"Yeah, because that's _totally_ what's happened all season," Noah said dryly. "All the others were just _raving_ when they tasted theirs, right?" he asked, looking to the other for confirmation and not receiving so much as a glance his way. "Tough crowd...," he muttered under his breath.

"The _challenge_ ," the host continued again unflinchingly as the music turned from tense to steady and expository. "Race through the mutant forest to find the _elusive_ Chris-a-lis flower," he explained holding up a notebook with photograph on the front of a dark pink flower with four petals and a winged stem. The shot cut in closer to pan up across the photo, showing the odd, two-toned stem and the hints of some sort of jagged white spikes near its base. "First person to present it to me wins immunity," the host finished.

"In other words," Harold added excitedly, "they'll get to decide who goes to the finale with them!" He looked up at Jasmine, and the two shared a smile.

"Yeah," Chris replied in annoyance, "thanks for doing my _job_ , four-eyes."

"So let me get this _straight_ ," Noah said, walking over with annoyance of his own rapidly shifting into anger. "After nature girl _dominated_ the last challenge, you want the finalists to be decided by a _flower-picking contest_. What, did getting trapped in a _cesspit_ for an episode make you decide to go _soft_ on her or something?"

"Oh, I wouldn't say I'm going _soft_ ," Chris answered with an impish smile. "Why don't you just take a step _closer_ to see what I mean."

Noah immediately looked at the vase-like flower between him and the host. "What could this _possibly_ do besides try to eat me," he said after a moment.

He took a step forward.

The flower bulged, then spat fire onto his shorts.

"Question answered!" Noah screamed, jumping back and frantically trying to pat out the small fire on his clothes. Chris laughed at his pain, and Chef – now back in his normal clothes and carrying a fire extinguisher – soon arrived and put out the fire.

"This place is _full_ of those pretty little softie flowers," Chris said with delight. "But the flower _you're_ looking for is attached to a very _special_ plant: a Venus _flytrap_! Or as I like to call him," he added slyly, " _Larry_."

Harold gasped. "Wait a minute! Venus flytraps are _carnivores_! It could actually _eat_ us!"

"Yeah, like it would bother with either of _us_ when _she's_ around to snack on," Noah smirked, pointing at Jasmine. A few flat notes played as she and Harold said nothing, and just looked around idly. "Okay, I see what's going on here," Noah said, his face falling back into mute annoyance.

"Probably for the better," Chris said, walking up between Noah and Jasmine and earning the silent attention of all three campers. "If I were you I'd save the insults for when you're in the forest and probably on fire. It's _funnier_ for us that way. Find Larry," he added, "and you find the flower. Oh, and watch your step." The shot cut outward to show a massive sinkhole a short ways away. "Those sinkholes are everywhere."

As if on cue, the southeast Asian male intern ran in from the left carrying a boom mic, and unintentionally fell straight into the hole with a cry and a splash. "Wait for it...," Chris said, holding up a finger. Moments later the intern emerged from the hole – or rather flew out of it. He had been mutated quite thoroughly: his left foot and right arm browned and swollen and misshapen; shorts spikes jutting out of his right shoulder; spots on his neck and sharper teeth and an enlarged left eye; and a pair of bat-like wings coming from his back. He let out some sort of pained roar as a dramatic riff played, then flew off. "See ya Josh!" his former boss called out. "Enjoy your new job at the _circus_!"

"So how exactly are we supposed to _find_ Larry?" Jasmine asked after a moment.

Chris responded by holding up a parchment map to them. "Of course! We each get a map!" Harold said in comprehension as the camera panned across a close-up of the map, showing little more than a winding dotted line leading from a bright green dot with an arrow pointing at it to a large, ornate X.

"Pfft, _no_ ," the host corrected, pulling the map back off-camera and tearing it up. "You each get a _piece_ of the map!" he said, handing two strips to Harold and Jasmine, and the third to Noah. "You think printer ink grows on trees?" The shot moved back enough to show the entire group again, the three campers studying their pieces of the map closely. "You can work together or you can go it alone," he told them before walking away to the left. "It's your call."

A grand tune began to play as the shot focused in on Jasmine and Harold putting their pieces together. "Dang," Harold said as the perspective moved between their shoulders, "looks like we only got the starting path."

"Which means the final location is...," Jasmine added, the camera moving back in front of them as they raised their heads and looked over at Noah.

"Right where it belongs," the schemer said, folding the scrap of parchment up and sticking it into his shirt. He smirked when he saw the others looking at him, and said "What, you didn't expect me to _share_ it with you, did you?"

"Whatever," Harold said as he and Jasmine began to walk forward, giving Noah dirty looks as they passed him by, "we can find Larry without it. Especially since I now what to look for to avoid those sinkholes."

"That so?" Jasmine asked with interest.

"Uh-huh," Harold nodded, eyes closed proudly. "When stepped on, they release a jet of _steam_ right before they collapse. So as long as we're on the look out for steam jets-" a jet of steam shot unnoticed next to him, and the ground beneath him promptly collapsed. He screamed in shock, but was quickly saved by Jasmine again.

"...we can avoid falling in, right?" she finished for him with a smile that he returned sheepishly as she lifted him back up to safety.

"Thanks for the tip," Noah shot at them as he walked past. "I'm sure you two _lovebirds_ will get on just fine," he said, chuckling as he walked off camera.

The shot zoomed in on Jasmine's confused face.

xxx

" _Lovebirds_?" she repeated in the confessional. "What was _that_ supposed to mean?"

xxx

"I don't know if Chris _meant_ to give me this part of the map," Noah said as he examined his piece with a broad smile, "but he might as well have handed me _victory_ along with it. I can just follow the others until _their_ part of the path ends, then ditch them and collect the flower." He folded the piece of parchment up and stuck it back into his shirt, then looked at the camera. "As long as I keep hidden they won't catch on, plus I'll get a front-row seat to see if that _L_ -bomb I just dropped goes anywhere," he said, rubbing his hands in anticipation.

xxx

The music turned tense as Noah broke into a run, then after a few seconds dived behind one of the giant mushrooms the mutant forest was filled with. The camera zoomed in as he leaned out from behind it and looked around warily, only to notice something a moment later and dart back in to hiding. A zoom back out revealed Harold and Jasmine walking up the path, the dweeb in front carrying both map pieces with the survivalist bringing up the rear but still looking puzzled.

"So I guess we just have to keep going until our trail ends, then trust your tracking skills to take us from there," Harold said, a jet of steam erupting from the ground next to him which prompted him to hop forward past the edge of the rapidly-sinking earth. "All while watching out for sinkholes, of course," he looked back over his shoulder and smiled proudly. "...and mutants, too," he added after looking forward again and thinking a little. "And don't forget about Noah. Hey, I don't suppose you saw where he went, did you?" he looked back and asked his companion.

Jasmine, her hand on her mouth in thought, looked up at him. "Hmm? Oh, no, I guess I lost track of him. He's a _wily_ little blighter, though, so he's probably got a plan." As they passed the large mushroom in the background, Noah leaned out from behind it unnoticed and smirked. He quickly tiptoed to the next piece of cover, a gnarled-looking tree, and ducked behind it as well before the others saw him.

She resumed her puzzled look, and Harold frowned. "Is something wrong?" he asked.

"It's probably nothing," she answered. "I just can't stop thinking about the crack he made earlier about us being _lovebirds_. I mean," she smiled and snorted, "does he _seriously_ think that we're in to each other? I mean, can you even imagine?"

"Yes, and quite often," Harold said with a blunt matter-of-factness before looking back at their map.

Jasmine blinked, then raised an eyebrow. "Wait, really?"

"Well, yeah," the dweeb said, looking back again with his brow furrowed. "Are you telling me that you've _never_ considered it? After everything we've been through together?"

"No," Jasmine told him. "It never even crossed my mind that we'd ever be anything more than friends."

"But now that it has, what do you think?" Harold said, stopping in his tracks and turning around. "I'm pretty dreamy, right?" he said, using as suave a voice as he could muster as the camera zoomed in to show him against a radiant background, slowly panning to follow his sweeping hand motion down to his sneakers then back up to his grinning face as a rapturous, almost shimmering tune last heard accompanying Justin played. He waggled his eyebrows seductively.

Jasmine stared for a second, then doubled over with snorting, thigh-slapping laughter.

xxx

She finished laughing in the confessional, wiping away a lone tear from her eye before starting. "Okay, Harold's a great guy and I'll admit that he _does_ have a lot going for him, but I'm just not into him. Hopefully I can let him down _gently_ ," she added with a bit of a sheepish cringe. "Although gentle isn't exactly something that comes _naturally_ to me."

xxx

Jasmine was still laughing as the challenge footage resumed. "Hey!" Harold said in offense, his hands on his hips. "I'm being _serious_!"

"I know," Jasmine said, straightening up and ending her laugh, "I'm sorry. But you really need to work on your girl-catching skills. That pose you did only made me think of you as a goofy friend _more_."

"Aw, come on!" Harold pleaded, Jasmine now walking ahead of him. "How am I not like the perfect guy for you? I'm smart, witty, talented, good-looking, _humble_ ," the shot briefly cut to Noah rolling eyes from behind one of the strange rock-like pillars growing out of the ground, "and most of all, I _love_ you! What more could you want?"

The survivalist shook her head and sighed. "I'm sorry, mate, I don't know what to say. I just...don't feel the same way about you as you do about me."

"Then what am I supposed to _do_?" Harold asked in growing desperation. "Just...give up on ever being loved by you?"

"Err...yeah, I guess that's probably the easiest way to go?" Jasmine answered uncertainly, her eyes focused on the path forward.

Harold huffed indignantly, then crossed his arms and closed his eyes and looked away. "Well _fine_. I see how things are. In fact, I'll make things _easier_ for you by just _leaving_!" He sniffed back a tear, then ran off with an anguished cry and the two map fragments still in hand.

"Harold, wait!" Jasmine called after, reaching out an arm but grabbing nothing. She let out her breath, palmed her face, and groaned.

A few deep notes played as she shook her head and ran off, leaving the camera to zoom in on Noah watching from behind another gnarled tree. He cackled a little to himself, then left the safety of his cover. "Well, with any luck that'll distract _her_ long enough for _me_ to get that flower. Although I should _probably_ focus on catching up to _Harold_ first..."

He broke into a confident jog through the unbeaten mutant forest...and promptly smacked into the back of a gigantic housefly. It promptly wheeled around on him and buzzed angrily, causing him to scream and run past it.

xxx

"Okay, starting to wonder whether trying to traverse the mutant terror forest _alone_ was really such a good idea," Noah told the outhouse camera with wide eyes.

xxx

"Yeah, I'll admit I kinda went a little overboard back there," Harold admitted. "Even though a part of me always suspected my love for Jasmine was unrequited, it's a pretty big deal to actual _hear_ it from the incredibly attractive though also metaphorical horse's mouth. Especially so _bluntly_. I mean, _gosh_ ," he suddenly abandoned his calm demeanor, "you can't blame a guy for _feeling_."

xxx

"Oh Goddess of Love, why have you forsaken me?" Harold exclaimed to the heavens, walking into a fire-breathing flower in his distraction. Finally looking forward again he yelped upon noticing the plant's ominous bulge, then yelped again as he dodged out of the way of its fiery spurt. "That was close," he said, wiping the sweat from his brow as he walked a couple steps away. "How much trouble would I be in right now if that had taken out the map?"

He paused a second, blinked, then looked down at the scraps of parchment in his hands as though he'd only just remembered them. "Oh right, I should really keep track of where I'm going." The shot cut to the image of the two partial map fragments as he held them side-by-side, then back out as he started to look from them to his surroundings. He absentmindedly took a couple steps back the way he'd came, looked at his map again, then turned back towards the path heading right and rubbed his chin. "Huh, I guess this is as far as it goes. So where to next?"

As he rubbed his chin in thought and consulted his map again, the shot zoomed outward with a short dramatic tune to show that not only was he next to the fire-flower again, but that it was preparing to use its signature weapon as well.

"Hmm...Larry is a Venus _flytrap_ ," he reasoned, unaware of the the sizzling sound and small plume of smoke coming from his backside, "I should try looking for a habitat that's poor in nitrogen...like a _bog_!" he declared in realization, perking up and extending a finger and sniffing the air in sudden confusion. "Hey, what's cooking?" he asked before stiffening in alarm and looking over his shoulder to see his pants on fire.

"My _biscuits_ are burning!" he cried out in panic before running off down the path, wildly trying to pat the flames out.

/

The music became tense and fast-paced again as the scene flashed to Jasmine, running along at a steady pace and leaving a trail of steam jets and sinkholes in her wake. She seemed too focused on looking around to notice, however, and none of them came close to catching her regardless, so she soon skidded to a halt it safely, though unknowingly, in front of the same fire-flower that had burned Harold.

"Where _is_ he?" she asked, looking around again in concern. "I could've sworn I heard him around here _somewhere_!"

A rustle and crash in the background underbrush caught her attention moments later, and her brow shot up in surprise as Noah suddenly ran out into the open, flailing his arms in vain at the massive fly that was now flying behind him, sucking on his massive head.

" _Shoo_!" he told it. "Go _away_ already! I'm not your lunch!"

Jasmine watched in silence as he ran by the fire-flower, stepped on a patch of ground that caused a jet of steam to erupt behind him, and fell with a startled scream into the ensuing sinkhole. The mutant fly detached itself and flew off, and the camera cut in to Noah hanging on to the edge of the hole. "Somebody help me!" he called out desperately, the music becoming even faster and more intense. " _Please_!"

As he struggled to gain a foothold the camera cut in close as one of his hands began to slip...only for Jasmine's to grab on to it, the background music becoming triumphant as he was lifted back to safety.

" _Thank you_!" he said, hugging Jasmine the moment his feet touched the ground but breaking it quickly in sudden embarrassment. "Uhh, heheh, no turning into some kind of freak for me, then," he said nervously under Jasmine's stern glare. His gaze followed him as he tried to slink away, but after a few steps he stopped and sighed. "Okay, fine, I'll share my part of the map with you," he said, pulling the scrap of parchment in question out of his shirt.

"Don't you think you be a little more grateful?" Jasmine asked, bending down slightly with her hand on her hips.

"Hey, I don't exactly have a lot to offer, okay?" Noah replied with a hint of irritation. "And don't expect me to promise not to vote you off if I actually happen to _win_ this, either," he added quickly and sharply, "you're still the biggest threat to my shot at the million so I gotta do what I gotta do. Would _you_ be willing to sabotage your chances if you were in my situation?"

"Well... _no_ ," Jasmine admitted hesitantly.

"Good," Noah told her. "I'm fine with owing you another favor or something, but save the collection until after the season's over."

Jasmine sighed. "Yeah, I got it," she said, leaning over to look at his piece of the map. "So, where _are_ we on this anyway?"

"That depends," the slacker replied, "where did the trail end on your parts?"

"Good question," the survivalist said, standing up straight and looking around.

Noah sighed. "Let me guess, our summer camp _Romeo_ ran off with both parts alone, didn't he?" He looked to Jasmine, who nodded in confirmation.

/

Harold's scream filled the air as the scene flashed back to him, now rolling back and forth along the ground to put out his flaming shorts. Though he extinguished them quickly he kept rolling further on to the right in his blind panic, only just managing to stop at the edge of a bubbling, steaming, bright green body of water. He sighed in relief, got back to his feet, turned around, and gasped as the music started to boom ominously.

"A _bog_!" he exclaimed in breathless awe, the shot cutting outward to show more of the waste-filled environment he now found himself in. A trail of small stepping stones led from the shore into the bog, and after approaching them he stopped and gasped again. "And _Larry_!" he exclaimed, the shot pulling back even more then panning to the right along the stepping stone path to reveal the utterly massive Venus flytrap – Chris-a-lis flower and all – waiting next to a dead tree on a small, desolate island. "Whoa, he's _huge_ ," Harold said in fearful awe.

"No," Chris' voice came suddenly over a loudspeaker wired in to a nearby tree, "he's _colossal_." He laughed, and the camera cut over to show him waiting in a white deck chair at what appeared to be the finish line for the challenge, watching a live feed of the bog on a television cart. "Will Harold live long enough to pick that flower?" he asked the camera as an unusual tune, drumming and blaring and deep, began to play. "And where the heck are Jasmine and Noah? Find out when we return, on Total! Drama! Rrre _venge_ , of the _Island_!"

(Fade to Commercial and Back)

A sweet, lilting, and all-around emotional tune began to play as the episode resumed on Chris in his chair, now with a notebook open on his lap and Chef standing behind him. "Ahh, _Larry_ ," the host sighed, "he used to be such a sweet, _cuddly_ little guy. We were inseparable," the camera cut in for a close-up of the book's contents, revealing it to be a photo album. The shot panned from a picture of Chris pushing a small potted flytrap in a baby carriage, to playing table tennis with the younger plant who held the paddle in its jaw-like leaves. "Until I left him on the island, and...kinda forgot about him for awhile while the toxic waste piled up," he said with a hint of remorse as the camera panned down to a photo of a slightly drooping Larry surrounded by waste barrels, "mutating him into a freakish botanical mistake."

Chris closed the album, and the shot cut back to him and Chef. "They grow up so fast," Chris said, putting a hand on the album cover and beginning to cry. Chef rolled his eyes.

xxx

"I knew comin' back to the island would dig up old memories," the hulking man told the outhouse camera, "but cryin' over a stupid plant? Uggh. That's just _pathetic_ ," he said, shaking his head.

xxx

"Hmm," Harold thought to himself, left hand rubbing his chin and mouth as he looked up and down the path towards Larry. "I guess the best way to go about this is to take the stepping stones over to him," he said, the camera panning across them...then focusing in on one that looked rather more like the peak of a giant turtle shell than anything else.

The shot cut back to the dweeb, who had backed up a few feet from the edge. He took a deep breath, then launched himself forward with a half-scream, half-battlecry. He cleared the first four stones with ease, but stumbled on the fifth – the turtle shell. The music blared dramatically as the shell began to shake, and Harold gasped in surprise as the mutant beast rose out of the toxic water to glare at him, then rear back on its hind legs and roar. Harold was sent flying by the motion, and landed in a painful heap back where he'd started.

"Awww-ha-ha-haww...," he groaned, "that was a bad idea..."

xxx

"That turtle's lucky it got the jump on me," Harold told the outhouse camera. "If I'd known it was there, I could have totally dealt with it using my mad yo-yo skills," he said, taking a red yo-yo out of his pocket and twirling it around like a bolas...until he accidentally hit himself in the side of the head and fell over with a pained groan.

xxx

"Well, at least Jasmine wasn't here to see that," Harold said, picking himself up and dusting himself off. "That would've been _humiliating_."

"Don't worry," Noah said with a smirk as he emerged from the forest, Jasmine right behind him, "seeing you get tossed by a giant _turtle_ wasn't funny at all."

Harold scowled, but his expression leveled out slightly when he noticed Jasmine. "Hey why are you two together?" he asked, growing angry. "You're not gonna team up and try and beat me, are you?"

"Who knows?" Noah replied with an impish shrug as he walked past the dweeb and looked out over the bog.

" _I_ do," Jasmine scowled, her expression softening when she turned to Harold. "Look, I just saved him from a sinkhole so he decided to share his map, that's all," she explained.

"A _likely story_ ," Harold said, crossing his arms and looking away stubbornly.

Jasmine grunted in irritation. "Fine, _be_ that way. _I'm_ going to get that flower." The music became fast and dramatic again as she ran forward, leaped into the air, landed on the head of the turtle and stunned it, jumped off again, and landed into a roll that stopped right next to the Chris-a-lis flower – which was nearly shoulder-height compared to her, with the jaw-like out leaves being utterly massive in comparison.

"Okay," she smiled to herself, standing up and reaching out slowly for the flower and wiggling her fingers in excited anticipation, "now to take this and _leave_." The shot cut to Harold and Noah watching astounded, then back to Jasmine as she touched the flower...and the leaf-jaws of Larry snapped up around her in an instant.

Harold gasped. "It ate her _alive_!"

"No duh," Noah added, "isn't that was those things _do_?"

The shot cut back to Larry as small, sharp bulges suddenly started forming one after the other as Jasmine struggled to break free. "Letmeoutletmeoutletme _out_!" she shouted in panic, her blows becoming stronger and stronger until Larry was forced to spit her out with enough force that she smacked against a tree and slid down to the ground, covered in digestive fluids and groaning. "Thanks a lot, mate," she said in woozy near-gratitude as Harold rushed over to her in concern.

"Are you alright?" he asked, pulling her to her feet then cringing at the thick, stringy digestive fluids that had gotten on his hand.

"Yeah, as soon as the three of you stop squawking like emus," she answered, swaying a little before collapsing back onto the ground to Harold's shock.

The focus moved back to Noah as he looked from his rivals to their shared obstacle, the sound of movement quickly getting his attention. The camera cut over to show Larry opening his leaf-jaws back up, the tongue-like Chris-a-lis flower popping out moments later.

"Okaaay...looks like the direct approach isn't gonna work here," Noah said to himself. "I'm guessing that flower is what triggers his jaws closing," he thought aloud as a faded clip of Jasmine getting eaten second earlier was replayed, "meaning anyone touching it is gonna have to be _pretty_ fast if they don't wanna end up on the menu. So how do I get a hold of that thing?" He tapped his chin in thought for a second, then snapped his fingers and smirked in realization. "That just might work," he said to himself, turning around and walking back towards the forest.

The camera zoomed in to Harold and Jasmine in the background as Noah passed them by in the fore, and Jasmine shook away her daze and got back on her feet.

"Now are you alright?" Harold asked again as Jasmine stood up by herself.

"Yeah," she answered, "yeah, I think so. Although I'm a little surprised to see _you_ so concerned. I thought you were mad at me."

"I can be mad at you and still love you, y'know," Harold huffed in annoyance. "I'm a pretty complex guy."

"I can see," Jasmine said, slightly dryly. "I don't suppose you'd be willing to work with me get the flower, though, would you?"

Harold blinked, looked back towards Larry still lying motionless with with flower out enticingly, then back again at Jasmine. "Okay," he said, "I'll help. After what just happened to both of us, I don't think we'll be able to get the flower alone."

"Exactly," Jasmine nodded, the music becoming plodding and thoughtful. "We can't approach it directly, so we'll have to go at it from another angle."

The brainy dweeb nodded as well and rubbed his chin in thought. "Ah-ha!" he declared after a second, a finger extended in excitement. "I have a plan!"

/

The music turned dramatic again as the footage skipped ahead to Jasmine, standing alone by the edge of the bog letting out the slack of a vine that led up into the trees. "Are you _sure_ you wanna do this?" she asked, the camera panning up along the length of the vine to the branch it had been thrown over, and down to the other end tied around Harold's waist.

"Definitely!" Harold called out in response, the shot zooming outward to show him hanging over Larry's open maw, slowly being lowered towards the flower in its center. "We just have to _trust_ each other, right? And work as a team!"

xxx

"Yeah, I volunteered to get the flower myself so that Jasmine could see how brave I am," Harold told the outhouse camera with a self-assured nod. "I'm sure that once she sees what I'm willing to do for her she'll finally fall for me."

xxx

"I can't say I _like_ risking Harold like this," Jasmine admitted, "but it's the only way this plan will work. I mean, there's no way Harold could lower _me_ down," she chuckled. "I'm pretty sure my cat _Whiskers_ is stronger than him."

/

A clip played of a dark gray cat sitting on a lawn washing its face. A large and white and hairy dog suddenly ran up to it barking wildly, but it didn't flinch, and as soon as the dog was close enough the cat turned and pounced, knocking the now-startled dog back off-screen. A few angry yowls and fearful barks punctuated the sound of a violent scuffle off-camera before the clip finally ended.

xxx

Harold was lowered further and further towards Larry's flower as the dramatic music resumed. "Almost there," he called out as he reached towards his target. "A little more...!" The camera zoomed in on the flower as his hands drew inches away from it. Before he could touch it, however, a few greenish motes of something drifted up from the Chris-a-lis and into Harold face; his eyes widened slightly and his nose twitched, but though he struggled to hold it back he couldn't help but sneeze. The force of it was enough to cause him to swing to the right away from the flower, its petals now fluttering in the slight wind caused by the sneeze.

The camera panned down to show Larry's jaw-leaves start to twitch, then over to Jasmine as she gasped and started pulling on the vine – and Harold along with it, yanking him away as he began to swing back towards the middle...right as Larry's jaws snapped shut. He was pulled forcefully all the way back up to the tree branch, stopping only after hitting his head on it – and cracking it slightly, as the shot zoomed in ominously to show.

"Gosh, what's the deal?" Harold asked, rubbing his head in pain as he hung below the branch.

"I could say the same to you," Jasmine replied as the music faded out. "What happened out there?"

"I guess I must be allergic to mutant Venus flytrap pollen," Harold answered. "Which is strange, because I'm not allergic to _regular_ Venus flytrap pollen. Three-hundred _other_ things, yes, but _not_ regular Venus flytrap pollen," he said, crossing his arms and nodding matter-of-factly.

"Uhh, good to know?" Jasmine said awkwardly, briefly looking towards Larry as he opened back up. "You don't have to do this, you know that right?" she asked Harold. "I'm fine trying to get the flower some _other_ way."

Harold looked down at her sternly. "Hey, I can do this! I'm happy that you're concerned about my well-being, I truly am," he told her, motioning to himself, "but what I need right now is your trust. Just as I trust _you_ not to drop me, so must _you_ trust _me_ to get this flower," he declared dramatically.

"If you say so," Jasmine said uncertainly, beginning to lower her partner back towards the exposed flower as the tense challenge music started up once more. The shot cut back up to the branch to show it creak and crack just a little bit more as the vine quickly slid over it.

"Closer, closer," Harold called out to her, eyes locked onto his target as he descended towards it again a few inches at a time. "Just a little bit more and it'll be _ours_!" he said with a grin of anticipation, the shot panning down to the flower mid-sentence – but at its end, a vine-lasso suddenly looped around it and plucked it off its stalk.

" _Finally_!" Noah exclaimed, the shot cutting to him standing on the opposite bank, reeling in his vine-lasso and discarding it once the Chris-a-lis flower was in his hands. "Sorry folks, but I gotta run!" he said, sending a mock salute across the bog before turning and dashing away in the opposite direction.

The shot quick-panned back over to Jasmine's stunned expression, which quickly dropped when she heard Harold scream. She gasped and quickly pulled on her vine with all her might, yanking Harold away just as Larry's leaf-jaws snapped close. However, the force of her pull finally snapped the branch the vine was draped over, causing Harold to arc through the air and land on his partner.

"My _love_!" Harold cried in anguish, still lying on top of Jasmine. "I'm so sorry I failed to get the flower for you! How can I ever be worthy of you now?"

Jasmine looked at him incredulously. "Wait, was this entire plan just a stunt to make me fall in love with you?" she asked in disbelief and growing outrage.

"...maybe?" Harold answered with a sheepish grin.

The survivalist pushed him off her with a grunt of disgust, but quickly had her attention caught by a rumbling coming from Larry's direction. His head-like leaf-maw rose up on a neck-like stem, ending in a dirty, grassy 'body' with several roots sticking out like limbs. He opened his 'mouth' and roared, then ran off in the direction Noah had gone.

Jasmine and Harold gasped in shock and horror. Then, after a moment, Harold turned and asked "You're still okay with working together, right?"

"...yeah, fine," Jasmine sighed after a moment.

xxx

"Look, I'm gonna have to have a _long_ talk with him about his feelings for me," Jasmine told the outhouse camera, "but that doesn't mean I don't wanna go to the finale with him anymore. It was always gonna be as friends anyway."

xxx

The scene cut to Noah, running as fast as he could with the flower in hand and a smile on his face. "I can't believe it," he said to himself, "I'm actually gonna beat those two!"

A thunderous stomping coming up behind him caught his attention, and upon looking back over his shoulder he dryly said "Nope, spoke too soon."

One of Larry's massive root-limbs suddenly shot out and grabbed him. "I HATE THIS STUPID ISLAND!" he shouted, descending into a scream as Larry held him upside-down close by.

His scream caught the attention of Jasmine and Harold as they ran down the path towards him. Jasmine sped up, and just as Larry was about to eat Noah she jumped up and snatched the flower from the schemer's dangling hand, quipping "Sorry mate, gotta run!" as she dropped back down to the ground.

Larry's maw snapped close, but after he moved Noah out of the way. "Hey, a little _help_ here would be appreciated!" the schemer called out angrily before Larry unceremoniously tossed him over his 'shoulder' and ran off in pursuit of Jasmine.

Noah landed head-first in the side of one of the giant mutant mushrooms, his lower half sticking out right in front of a fire-flower. "Yeah, well see if I help the next time _your_ butt's on the line!" he shouted angrily through the mushroom, prompting the fire-flower to to ignite his shorts. "AAAGGH! NOT AGAIN!" he screamed.

/

The shot cut back to Jasmine, flower in her hand and Larry on her tail. She leaped and rolled as he tried to trip her up with a swing from one of his roots, then looked to her right as the shot pulled back, revealing Harold running alongside them.

"Throw it to me!" he said, waving his arms wildly to get her attention. "I'm open!" Jasmine looked from him to the flower and back again with a hesitant look on her face, but nodded just the same and tossed it his way. He jumped and caught it in both hands, then cried out "Yes! Awesome!" in excitement.

He promptly sneezed, which caused him to duck under a swipe from Larry's roots. He narrowly dodged a second one, then looked up in terror – Larry was now standing over him, and roared angrily.

Harold screamed and ran, scrambling under the mutant plant's root-limbs and running forward with the flower stretched out in front of him. The camera zoomed out to show Larry right behind him and Jasmine further in front, a worried look on her face. "Pass it back here!" she called out to him. "We have to keep it away from him as long as possible!"

The music cut away suddenly as the scene moved to Chris and Chef waiting at the finish line, watching the live feed of the massive flytrap's pursuit. "Take your time, Harold!" the host called out, pausing to laugh. "Larry hasn't had a decent meal since I stopped feeding him after season one. Poor guy must be _famished_."

"Harold, please!" Jasmine called out, the challenge music resuming just as quickly as it had cut away. "Stop trying to do stupid things to win my heart and do what we have to to _win_!"

"Don't worry, I can _do_ this!" Harold replied, briefly glancing over his shoulder to see Larry still stomping along right behind him. "Don't you trust me?"

Jasmine hesitated for a moment. "Not with _this_!" she admitted.

Harold gasped indignantly. "If you don't trust _me_ to win this for us, then how can I trust _you_ to take me to the finale if you win?" he asked.

"Why _wouldn't_ I?" Jasmine asked in sheer disbelief.

"I don't know!" Harold replied with a cry.

The survivalist grit her teeth in frustration, and as Larry drew ever closer to her companion she yelled "Just throw it!" with a ferocity that startled Harold into complying. She caught the thrown flower with ease, and looked back over her shoulder to see Larry turn his attention towards her. "That's right, big guy, just keep watching the flower," she said under her breath, smiling confidently...

...and stepping right into a sudden jet of steam. Taken off guard and then off balance, she stumbled back with a cry of "Whoa-oa!" as she got out of range of the sinkhole that had just formed.

Larry snapped her up without warning, but his flower was dropped and drifted forward in the wind.

The shot cut to Chris as he watched the feed and laughed. "You're welcome, Larry!" he called out to the plant.

"Let me _out_!" Jasmine shouted as she struggled against Larry's maw, the plant monster drawing back to his full height but unable to fully close his leaves around the survivalist.

Harold gasped in shock and horror and took a step towards them, but then gasped again when he noticed the flower floating away down the path.

"Harold!" his partner called out, gaining his attention again. "Just keep going and win the challenge! I can hold this guy off, just trust me!" She let out a short scream as Larry's 'mouth' briefly closed down around her, but she forced it back open in seconds. "Just _go_ already!" she yelled down angrily at Harold as she struggled, the camera cutting back down to show him gaping.

"I can win," he said to himself, looking back to see the Chris-a-lis flower now on the ground. "But can I really just leave her here?" he added, looking back at Jasmine and Larry as the leaves closed around her once more. Harold's eyes widened in alarm, and a grand yet emotional tune began to play as the footage flashed back to a montage of clips from throughout the season.

/

"Uhh, are you and I gonna have a problem?" Jasmine asked sternly in their first meeting on the boat ride to the island.

"I've never seen a girl as _big_ as you in real life before," Harold replied, causing his soon-to-be teammate to raise an eyebrow in wary disbelief.

/

"Good call, mate," Jasmine smiled. "So, you got any experience as an outdoorsman then?"

"Of course," Harold said, closing his eyes and puffing his chest up proudly. "I've been in the Scouts since I was seven, and have earned _several_ badges in a wide variety of subjects."

Jasmine snorted out a laugh. "Good to know," she told her smiling teammate.

/

"I'm fine," Harold wheezed, climbing up to another ledge. "I'm just...pacing myself so I don't exhaust all my stamina."

Trent raised an eyebrow, then looked back up at Jasmine, who was now smiling. "I hear ya mate, good call!" she told him. "Just don't be afraid to holler if you need help, okay?"

"Got it!" Harold replied with a dopey, beaming grin.

/

Trent and Harold just smiled and walked towards their 'new' teammates, exchanging a high-five as they passed each other. Harold sat next to Jasmine, who smiled and punched him lightly in the arm. "Great to have you back, mate. And sorry for almost eliminating you back then," she said with a more apologetic tone. "I hope you can forgive me."

"I already have," Harold grinned, earning smiles from both Jasmine and Zoey.

/

"Well in that case, I'm glad you're here with us, Jasmine," Zoey said, looking back and smiling at her teammate. "I'd hate to think what would happen if you weren't."

The three were silent for a moment before Harold said "Well, I'd probably be able to fight it off. I'm well-trained in ka-ra-te," he said with a cocky nod and quick chopping pose.

"Good to know," Jasmine said with a slightly relieved smile.

/

"Now let's just see if...," she trailed off as she stepped back over to the cabinet they'd been searching, and felt around on top it with her long arm. After a second she smiled. "Got one!" she declared, pulling her arm back and holding up a key. She looked at Harold's grin, then tossed the key to him. "You take it," she told him with a smirk.

"It is my _honor_ ," Harold replied slowly, holding the key up to his wide, sparkling eyes as though it were priceless treasure.

/

"In other words," Harold added excitedly, "they'll get to decide who goes to the finale with them!" He looked up at Jasmine, and the two shared a smile.

/

The montage ended and the scene cut back to an upwards shot of Harold standing before Larry with his back to the camera. "No," he said as Jasmine once again began to pry open the monster plant's leafy maw. "We've been there for each other all season, and love or no love that's not gonna stop now!. He took a deep breath, puffed out his chest, and called out "I'm coming, Jasmine!" as the glorious tune hit its peak and transitioned into more typical challenge fare.

"Feel the wrath of the yo-yo!" Harold yelled as he charged forward, pulling his red yo-yo out and spinning it around. He shot it forward as Larry lashed out with one of his roots; Harold pirouetted to the side as his yo-yo wrapped around the limb, and the mutant flytrap responded by jerking its root back up, pulling Harold along with it.

The shot cut to Larry's 'head' to reveal that Jasmine had now pried it open just about as far as she could with her arms and legs outstretched and her back to the outside world. She glanced back over her shoulder, and in shock cried out "Harold, _no_!"

Moments later the dweeb flew up and delivered a solid punch to the roof of Larry's mouth, causing it to lift up a bit as he landed awkwardly next to Jasmine. The survivalist was knocked off-balance, and Larry's jaw snapped shut again around both of its captives.

"Now let's get you out of here!" Harold said brightly from within the plant's maw, causing Jasmine to scream in fury and start pounding hard on Larry's leafy jaws.

The camera pulled back a ways to ground-level, and a pair of olive-colored sneakers stepped in front of it. The perspective inverted to reveal it as Noah, watching the scene with wide, terrified eyes. "Uhh...o _kaaayyy_...," he said slowly and warily, "looks like you guys have it handled, so...I'll just leave you to it!" Another shift in viewpoint showed him running past Larry and the nearby sinkhole while the mutant once again tried to keep his mouth closed against Jasmine's furious struggles, and the shot cut to a top-down view of the Chris-a-lis flower lying on the ground as Noah stepped up to it and picked it up. "I'll just be taking _this_ ," he smirked, the camera cut up to his face just before he ran off.

Larry took immediate notice and, despite the persistent struggles in his maw, growled angrily and took off in pursuit.

"There's the finish!" Noah said with wide-eyed panic. "Just a little bit more!"

"Hurry up!" Chris called out as the shot cut to his lounging spot behind the finish line, the music abruptly cutting out. "C'mon, Larry, he's almost made it!"

The music cut back in again with a much tenser tune as Noah, panting and sweating, ran for the finish line with Larry right on his tail. The monstrous plant took a swipe at him with a root-arm, forcing Noah to dive forward with a scream. He hit the ground on his stomach, and with a grunt of desperation and effort he scrambled back to his feet...and across the finish line, tossing the flower into Chris' lap the moment he was able. He collapsed to the ground after moving another few inches.

"Noah, for the _win_!" the host said excitedly, holding up the Chris-a-lis flower as a few pleasant notes. He rose from his chair and walked over to the mutant, who had stopped in its tracks outside the finish banner. "Larry! Buddy!" he said as a short but triumphant tune played. "Look what I rescued for you!" He paused, then frowned. "Uh, you okay there Larry?" he asked in concern, then camera panning up to the great mutant's head as another round of strong blows from within caused him to whimper in pain and open his mouth. Jasmine stuck her head out of it and gasped for breath, then dropped down with Harold under her arm, apparently unconscious. Dripping with Larry's digestive fluids, they landed flat on the ground together.

Chris looked at them, shrugged, then held up the stolen flower. "Who's a good man-eating plant?" he cooed at his pet, a sweet ad playful melody playing as it bent down and sucked up its flower, then rubbed Chris with it's 'head'. "Mmm, Larry's a good man-eating plant, yes you are," the host said, giving it a few affectionate pats and then scratching under its massive 'chin' as it repositioned its head. Larry seemed to smile in contentment, and a sudden pounding the shook the entire drew attention to its leg-roots as it stamped the ground like a loyal and loving dog.

"Yeah, I could've gone my whole life without seeing _that_ ," Noah said dryly as the shot cut to him and Chef watching a close-up of Larry's pounding foot on the live feed. Chef nodded in agreement.

The shot panned to the left to show Jasmine limping forward with her arm around a half-conscious and groaning Harold. "Did we win?" he asked weakly as a much more touching tune began to play.

" _No_ ," Jasmine answered bitterly, not meeting his gaze.

"Oh...," Harold said, looking down in disappointment before looking back at her with a cheesy and hopeful grin. "But you gotta admit that what I did was pretty _cool_ , right?"

Jasmine dropped him on the ground as the music blared sadly.

/

"Aww, come on," Harold pleaded as he followed an angry-looking Jasmine through the common area, "I was just trusting my gut, _and_ my instincts, both of which told me to save you! It was a gesture of how much you mean to me! Doesn't that count for _anything_?"

"Not when I was about to save my _self_ ," Jasmine replied, wheeling around in anger and thrusting a finger at his chest. "Not when I _told you_ to win the challenge for us while you had the chance!" She threw up her arms in aggravation, causing Harold to cower and back away a step. "Not when I've already made it clear that I _don't_ want you doing things in order to win my love!" She let out her breath and lowered her arms, calming down a little but still leveling a stern glare at the boy standing before her. "You can't just keep doing things for me and expect me to automatically fall in love with you. That's not how it works." She shook her head at him, and turned her back, and began to walk away.

Harold slumped. "I know," he said in a pitiful tone, "I'm sorry. I realized that I'm _fine_ being just friends, and I promise I'll never try to win your love like that again!"

Jasmine stopped, and looked back at him over her shoulder with anger and bitterness still in her eyes. "You should've realized that a long time ago, mate. It's too late for it now. Thanks to _you_ , I've lost my shot at a million dollars."

She continued up onto the steps of the cabin, but the camera zoomed in on Harold as he fell to his knees and hung his head in shame.

/

A trio of deep, ominous notes punctuated the flash ahead to the long-distance shot of nighttime Wawanakwa that opened the usual marshmallow ceremony.

"Eeeeeelimination time!" Chris begun excitedly, the scene cutting not to the fire pit but to the Dock of Shame, the Final Three already waiting with the host and host's assistant by the Hurl. "Noah! By refusing to to help rescue your fellow players from the jaws of a _monster_...," Chris said as the camera panned from the catapult to Jasmine and Harold and Noah to him and Chef, another trio of deep notes punctuating the end of his statement.

"Hey," Noah shrugged, "it looked like _Power Girl_ could handle it." He pointed a thumb at the girl in question, who frowned in annoyance.

"...you've secured yourself a place in the finale," Chris finished. "Aaaa~aand, you get to choose your opponent, _in_ said finale."

"Duh," Noah deadpanned, "no surprise. Well, aside from the fact that _I'm_ the one doing the choosing, I guess," he added with a smirk, giving a sly side-glance to Harold as he hung his head in shame.

"Who will get the Hurl of Shame?" Chris asked. "Will it be _Jasmine_ , the strongest girl to ever play the game?" Jasmine looked down sadly. "Or will it be-"

" _Me_ ," Harold spoke up with a slightly dramatic tone to Jasmine's surprise. "Can there be any other choice?" he added, earning odd looks from the other two campers and a few deep notes from the background score.

"Err...," Jasmine said in confusion.

"It was _I_ who failed today," he said, turning towards her as the soft trill of the elimination rose up. "Both you, and _myself_. I _deserve_ to go home."

"Umm, Harold?" Chris interrupted with mild confusion of his own. "Yeah, that's nice and all, but it's _not_ your choice."

"Isn't it?" the dweeb declared dramatically, stepping forward. "After all, was it not my choice to give up victory for my own foolish reasons? Isn't this elimination merely the _consequence_ of that choice?"

"Dude, were you not listening?" Noah asked irritably. "He already said that this was my call to make."

"...I know," Harold admitted. "I was just hoping to sway your decision." He paused for a second, then sheepishly asked "Did I make a difference?"

Noah gave him a dull, disbelieving stare. "Yeah, eliminating a pathetic drama queen like you is _totally_ looking like the better option for me now," he said with thick and scathing sarcasm.

A single deep note played as the shot cut outward, and the others present looked at Noah expectantly. The shot cut back in as he looked around at the and said "Seriously, I'm voting for _Jasmine_. What were you people expecting from me?"

"That," Jasmine sighed, the sombre elimination music starting up as Chef walked over and grabbed the eliminated survivalist by the arm. Harold hung his head in shame, and Noah rolled his eyes.

/

The scene skipped ahead to show Jasmine loaded into the Hurl of Shame, Chris standing by at its lever and Chef near the bucket. "Bon voyage," he told her with a dark smile as Chef suddenly slammed a garbage back over her body.

"H-hey! What's the big idea?" Jasmine asked, her voice muffled and frantic as Chef hastily bound her with rope.

"What, did you think I'd forgotten about how you flung me into a a pit of _poo_ the other day?!" he said with a sudden burst of anger, launching her screaming into the night without further ceremony.

"Whoops," he said, the camera cutting back down to him as the series' capstone theme opened up and Chef walked over with the ceremonial strongbox, "she forgot her Toxic Marshmallow of Loserdom. Oh well," he said calmly. "Chef, dispose of it so it's not _dangerous_."

Chef gave the camera a nervous and uncertain look.

"Wwwwell," Chris said, walking back over to the center of the dock where Harold and Noah were still standing, "not gonna lie and say I wasn't hoping Jasmine would make it to the end, unmentionable incidents notwithstanding. I was really looking forward to billing the finale as Brains vs Brawn," he explained to the two actual finalists, both of whom were looking annoyed. "But I guess a duel between a couple of pencil-necked nerds will be exciting _too_...I guess..."

"Wow, your confidence is _stunning_ ," Noah said dryly.

"Yeah," Harold chimed in. "I mean, _gosh_ , we both made it this far for a reason. And we totally have a big friends-turned-enemies thing going on," he added, motioning from himself to Noah and back.

" _True_ ," Chris said, rubbing his chin in thought. "Well, whatever the case may be," he said, resuming his usual demeanor as he turned to face the camera, "I'll be sure to find a way to spice things _up_ a little. So get ready for some death-defying _mortal combat_ , next time on the _epic_ final round of, Total! Drama! Revenge of the Island!"

Although the shot staggered outward as usual, the scene did not fade away. Instead, the chirping of countless crickets led into a tense trill, and the scene moved to the campfire pit as Chef walked up with strongbox in hand. He looked warily from it, to the left, and to the right, deep beats punctuating every move until he finally smiled, and tossed the entire box into the fire.

The camera cut back to the long-distance view of the island as a massive explosion went off, a flash of light followed by a boom and shake and cloud of smoke that rose up from where the pit had been located.

(Fade to Credits)

* * *

 **Author's Note - Post Script**

Whoever said that I had to keep the finale as Brains vs Brawn? This is Shuffled, after all. Although admittedly a lot of you were hoping and/or predicting it would be Harold vs Noah.

Speaking of, I gotta give props to StayOuttaMyShed for predicting this from episode one. Seriously, I was completely shocked to see it thrown out there as a possible finale as it's not an especially obvious choice when looking at the cast. And don't think I only decided on them as the finalists then, either - I've intended on a Noah-Harold finale for quite some time. Jasmine getting third was decided on a long time ago too, as it's not only a good placement for her but it would also allow me to keep a fake-out potential 'Brains vs Brawn' finale alive for as long as possible.

I will say that I'm surprised how many people were predicting a Jasmine vs Noah finale, simply because it was the least likely given how the story was set up. Noah, obviously, was always going to prefer to take Harold over Jasmine; while Jasmine, who reasonably expects the same amount of challenge from either, would prefer to give her friend Harold a shot at the million. So the only way Harold doesn't end up in the finale would be if he got injured, which...ehhm it's not something I can see myself doing.

But back to this week's challenge, I hope everyone enjoyed how it went down. Noah casually gets Harold to reveal his crush on Jasmine, which causes a bit of a rift between them. But rather than the more obvious route of Jasmine deciding to abandon the win to save Harold from Larry, instead it was Harold's decision to attempt to save Jasmine, who didn't really need it. So rather than a heroic decision that led to the decider's downfall, it was a heroic mistake that led to the saved person's downfall. And now Jasmine's rather mad at Harold for costing her the million by trying to impress her with a needless act of heroism.

So...yeah. Let me know what you thought of the episode, and of the Final Two! And, of course, feel free to state your predictions for next season's cast, as this is gonna be the last chance to have any hope of influencing it.

I look forward, as always, to your reviews. I'll see you all next week!

\- Fangren

* * *

 **Appendix: TSROTI Eliminated Contestants**

Cody - (13th Place)

Izzy - (RETURNED | Formerly AWOL)

Leonard - (12th Place)

Justin - (11th Place)

Lindsay - (10th Place)

Cameron - (9th Place)

Izzy - (Tied for 7th Place | Mutated, but captured)

Gwen - (Tied for 7th Place)

Zoey - (6th Place)

Trent - (5th Place)

Courtney - (4th Place)

Jasmine - (3rd Place)


	13. Chapter 13 - The Ultimate Showdown

**Author's Note**

And here we are, folks, at the much-awaited finale to Total Shuffled Revenge of the Island! The first thirteen-episode season concludes today, and it's been quite a journey for the second generation of Shuffled campers. But it's about to come to an end, as Harold and Noah duke it out to decide the fourth winner of the series.

First, though, it's time to take care of the last round of publicly-answered reviews of this season.

 **Gage the Hedgehog:** Thanks! I hope you like it.

 **Tokusatsu-31st Century:** Haha, good to hear. Enjoy the season four finale, I've done my best to make Harold vs Noah as amazing as I can.

 **Guest #1:** Ehh, no, he was never planned to actually be booted early on - just switched to the Rats. Anyway, I'm glad you enjoyed last week's episode, and I hope the finale today is a high note to start off your summer vacation.

 **DSX62415:** Well, even with no Jasmine in the picture, I hope you enjoy how the finale plays out. Oh, and next season is gonna be All-Stars, simply because having Pahkitew first to include its cast in All-Stars would be...more work than I'd like to do to change the plots of the seasons to fit. Plus, it would break the 'alternate canon' thing I have going on a little bit more than I'd like.

 **Sarcasm Is A Habit:** Ah, well, sorry to disappoint you in that way then. And yeah, Harold is definitely someone who can easily get on people's nerves, but I think that's part of what makes him a great character. I hope you enjoy this final battle between him and Noah!

 **bruno14:** I'm glad you enjoyed last week's episode, and that I finally made Noah into a believable antagonist for you. And yeah, it certainly seems like Noah getting Harold to confess his love for Jasmine did more than just lead to Jasmine's elimination... Anyway, good to hear you're looking forward to Pahkitew Island and the romances it may bring.

 **PizzaTheBomb:** Haha, but yeah, in this series you can't always count on things following canon. To be honest, from the start of the series I knew Jasmine was always gonna be considered a finalist season simply for being the mostly obviously brawny member of the cast, which was exactly why I knew I couldn't have her as a finalist - it would be too obvious. Good to hear you're rooting fr Harold, and that you find him so amusing. Sorry to disappoint with the lack of reciprocal HaroldxJasmine, but it may very well be for the better...

 **Animation Adventures:** Yeah, Jasmine had a pretty awful time last week. And the garbage bag was definitely deliberate on my part, simply to mirror how Chris put Fang with Scott as revenge for the events of episode 11. I'm happy the conflict between her and Harold went down so well, at least from a writer's standpoint - obviously it made things worse for those two personally, and it's something both with have to deal with. And Noah, on the other hand, did quite well for himself, as you said. Sure, he does owe Jasmine a bit after she saved him from mutation, but all the same he managed to take advantage when he could and got to the end under his own power. And even though you already know some of the cast for next season, I'm still looking forward to your reaction at who else I've decided to include.

 **acosta perez jose ramiro:** Thanks for the review as always! And regardless of what happens, I hope you enjoy the season finale.

 **ashDanLand:** Thank you very much for praising my writing! I hope I'll be able to keep up its quality. And...yeah, the Noah-Harold finale was probably easier to predict than I'd like, but I think they're a great Final Two regardless. I can see what you mean about other canon Final Twos being better than Cameron-Lightning; especially Cameron-Jo considering their season-long conflict. And as for All-Stars, it will be Heroes vs Villains like in canon with seven of each, as well as seven boy and seven girls, seven 'classic' contestants and seven players from this season. It's a lot of nice, even splits.

 **moka evans:** Glad to hear you're excited about Noah being in the finale. And I'm probably even more glad to hear the you enjoyed the Jasmine-Harold drama so much; you're exactly right that things like that just don't happen too often in stories. Not only does Harold need to learn to deal with his unrequited crush and get over Jasmine, but he also needs to learn what will and won't be appreciated. Despite being a finalist, he's certainly made his share of questionable moves, even if they did seem justified to him. And, of course, Noah is in much the same situation so I think it'll be an interesting finale.

 **Alice Queen of Madness:** Yup, that's what sucks about this series - only two people each season get to have endings, and only one of them can canonically win. Each elimination tugs at heartstrings and disappoints viewers who have to see their favorite's downfall, but such is a necessary consequence of the story. And hey, Noah and Harold are a great Final Two in their own right, and I think people are going to enjoy this finale.

 **graveexcitement:** Oh yeah, you didn't. Well, no big deal. I'm glad you enjoyed both Jasmine's chance to really shine in a challenge, as well as her elimination last week and how it came about. Honestly, Noah being considerably less malevolent than the other main antagonists has been something I've really wanted to show as it seems like the most natural way to go about him - he was never exactly an antagonist in canon, after all. But nevertheless he has both brains and a bit of underhandedness to him, which is I think a big part of what makes him and Harold great foils to one another going in to this finale. I think people are really gonna love it. Regarding next season's cats, I will confirm it again as following the Heroes vs Villains theme, though not everyone I've chosen for the cast will be so, ah, straightforward I guess? Most will, but some won't. Other than that, the only other thing I can really say at this time is that holy crap were the Heroes hard to choose. There's just so many great choices! But I'm confident that the cast I've put together is great, though probably one of many excellent combinations.

 **I. M. Poik:** Ahaha, glad to see you so happy about a Final Two for once. I figured I had to get a combination you'd like sooner or later... But yeah, regardless of how this goes down I hope you enjoy it regardless. Though admittedly the title I chose doesn't have the same 'zing' as the canon one did (it was surprisingly difficult to come up with something to replace the 'Brains vs Brawn' part). Oh, and to actually answer some of your ending questions for once: you'll get to see Izzy and Fang interact, and the garbage bag tied to Jasmine last episode was empty, serving only to trigger her claustrophobia.

 **Star Saber21:** Yeah, I think a lot of people were. But ultimately, it just wasn't her time to shine - it was Noah's, with Harold messing up big time to round things out. Harold and Noah will indeed be interesting, at least in my opinion, and they will indeed receive messages from home. I hope you enjoy all that is to come...

 **VIPGuest:** Ah, a big Marvel fan are you? Well...I won't say I'm the same, superhero movies and comics just don't really do it for me. Though even without that influence, I hope you enjoy Harold vs Noah.

 **Guest #2:** That so? I honestly have no idea if you've reviewed before, since you're an anon Guest lol. But still, I'm glad you reviewed. I'm glad you're looking forward to some relationship drama next season, although with Duncan not slated to appear until the season after you won't be getting any Courtney-Gwen-Duncan action like in canon.

 **Derick Lindsey:** Hey there! Always nice to hear from long-time readers, I'm glad I've been able to give you some enjoyment and happiness with my writing. Interesting predictions regarding next season's cast; not much I can really comment on though, mind. But hey, I hope you let me know what you think of my choices for next season's cast when it debuts next week, and of course your thoughts on this week's finale if you so choose. And as for you suggestions for Pahkitew Island, I'll keep them in mind though no promises that I'll use them.

 **Guest #3:** Yup, no Brains vs Brawn - I figured that with Jasmine as the only really, truly brawny person this season it would be a good idea to change things up and do away with the canon billing. Interesting cast predictions, of course, though I think more of the old generation of campers have plot left than you realize. I've got a lot of interesting ideas lined up for next season. And as for other Dawn ships I like besides DJawn...well, there's Dawmmy, obviously, as well as the polyamorous DJawmmy featured in the Shuffled series.

 **Joel Connell:** Good to hear from you again, then. Glad to see you're still interested in the series, and I hope both this week's finale and next week's All-Stars premiere live up to your expectations.

 **Jaspher 4 Me:** Yeah, Jasmine really ended up the victim last week - she was doing so well, but then her well-meaning ally messed it up for her. Now, let's see, you wanted the Shuffled ROTI promo picture, eh? Hmm, let's see...the lack of a husky centerpiece makes this a tad difficult, but I'll give it a rough shot. Background is the same as canon, of course, and Jasmine is standing tall and proud in the the right of her is Trent, his guitar case on his back and his arm around Gwen's waist; then Courtney crossing her arms and glaring at the couple out of the corner of her eye; and Izzy on the end in cheering mid-jump. To the left of Jasmine is Harold, a finger raised as though about to spout off some 'fascinating' fact; then Zoey, waving with a bit of anxiousness; then Noah, smirking calmly; then Leonard, his arms and wand raised to cast a spell. In front of Jasmine are Cameron on the right, a hand on his glasses, and Cody on the left, down on one knee and doing the same cheesy double peace signs as in the canon TDI promo pic. And in the very front are Lindsay and Justin lounging on the ground, Lindsay waving happily at the camera and Justin admiring his own reflection in a hand mirror. I think that's everyone?

 **CVluvFoxy:** Thanks! I'm really getting the feeling that this season's Final Two is a lot more popular than the somewhat controversial (at least as I recall?) Final Two last season. I hope you enjoy how the final episode of the season goes down!

 **StayOuttaMyShed:** Haha, yeah. Like I said, I was super surprised that you gotta it right just as basically a shot in the dark. Admittedly, I probably should have made Jasmine less under-the-radar in terms of plot, as you said. And yeah, Harold was definitely meant to be annoying last week - but it's a lesson that I think is worth telling. But at least he was entertaining. And as for the weapons and armor that our two nerds will be crafting for themselves...well, I think the ideas I've given them are both quite suitable. And...I can tell you're certainly still annoyed at Ella winning last season and the role my preference for good people winning in the end played in that, but there's not a whole lot I can say to you without spoiling which ending this season ends up being canon.  
And yeah, it's super hard to believe that I've nearly finished writing the first chapter of TSAS (I'm up to around the point in the episode that Alejandro was freed in canon). Interesting and very well thought-out predictions for next season's cast, and a lot of it did end up mirroring some of my own thought processes (though I will admit that I haven't yet seen a completely accurate cast list prediction for next season). As you can see, creating an All-Stars cast out of so many possibilities is difficult, especially when you consider that the cast needs to feel like All-Stars and that I have so many different readers to try and please. But regardless, I hope you enjoy what I've chosen and I look forward to hearing your thoughts on them after the premiere next week.

 **crossoversfanTJ:** Well, it would be antic-climactic at least in terms of last week's episode...I'd still find a way to make the actual finale be exciting no matter who the finalists were. Interesting predictions for next season's cast, as well as some fairly safe assumptions behind them - though the only one I'll outright confirm as having been followed is the 14-person cast. As for the WT newbies and gender ratios compared to canon...well, you'll just have to wait until next week to see if those assumptions were truly safe.

 **link9753:** Well, you'll just have to read on and find out what happens, won't you? And don't worry about repeating yourself, it's always nice to be reminded of people's predictions. Enjoy the finale!

 **Guest #4:** ...there's nothing I can really say to answer this without spoiling next season's cast, so forgive me.

And that's it for this season's reviews! As always for finales, I won't be answering the reviews posted for them - not publicly at least. I will try and at least answer them over PM, but if I don't answer yours you shouldn't take it personally - either I haven't found the time to answer it yet, or I just can't think of anything to say of any substance.

And for the last time this season,the **_poll in my profile will remain up until the start of next season,_** despite me admittedly forgetting that it exists a few times by now, and **_a TVTropes page for this series exists_** , and as per usual with such things, could always use more work. I thoroughly appreciate those who've already been working on it, and look forward to seeing what you all add next. Seriously, thank you so much to everyone who's put in work to keep the page updated! By which I mean mostly TVTropes user TotallyRidonculous who I...am pretty sure is Animation Adventures? But yeah, thanks so much!

Moving on, this week is gonna pit Harold vs Noah in what I hope will be a jaw-dropping fourth season finale. Read on, and enjoy!

\- Fangren

* * *

 **Episode 13 – The Ultimate Showdown**

"Last time, on Total Drama Revenge of the Island!" Chris opened, the scene moving from the typical long-distance stock shot of sunny Wawanakwa to the finale trio of contestants standing together in the Mutant Forest of Death, Noah cracking a joke but not getting a reaction from Harold or Jasmine. "The Final Three went hunting for my old pal _Larry_ , the human flytrap." Jasmine was shown getting trapped by the massive plant's jaw-like leaves the moment she touched its central flower, and Chris laughed. "Awww, _adorable_ ," he said as the two nerds watched with horror from the sidelines, the next clip showing Larry rising up out of the ground, roaring, and running off.

"Jasmine and Harold vowed to take each other to the finale," the two friends were shown slapping five and clasping hands in mutual confidence over breakfast, "but the reveal of Harold's unrequited crush pulled them apart." Noah was shown casually revealing Harold's feelings as he walked by; Harold was shown running off dramatically with his and Jasmine's map fragments in hand; and Jasmine was shown getting snapped up by Larry again after avoiding a sinkhole.

"In the end, Noah won immunity," the schemer's desperate dive and scramble past the finish line was the next clip played, and was followed by Jasmine's departure while tied and bagged in revenge for a previous slight towards the host, "and gave _Jasmine_ the old heave-hurl!"

"Only _two_ competitors remain," Chris said over shots of Harold acting dramatic and Noah's irritable reply, then both of them talking with the unimpressed host, "Noah and Harold in the _ultimate_ Total Drama showdown!" The montage ended there, the scene cutting to the Dock of Shame where Chris and Chef stood in their formal attire – the host in his baby blue tuxedo, the assistant in his dark pink evening gown holding the prized suitcase. "It's _Nerd_ versus _Nerd_ in a tooth-rattling, ego-bashing, life-threatening battle for a cash prize _of_ ," he motioned to Chef and the shot cut to a close-up of the suitcase, which was opened to reveal the money inside, " _One_! _Million_! _Dol-lars_!"

Chef wiggled his fingers eagerly and reached for the cash, but the quickly cut to his face as something snapped and he yelped in pain. He raised his hand to reveal that he gotten his fingers caught in a mouse trap, and glared at the laughing host. "Right here, right now," Chris told the camera as it cut back to him, "on the epic finale of, Total! Drama! Rrre _venge_ , of the _Island_!"

xxx

(Fade to Opening Theme)

 _Dear Mom and Dad, I'm doin' fine;_

 _You guys are on my mind!_

 _Ya asked me what I wanted to be,_

 _And now I think the answer is plain to see!_

 _I wanna be...famous!_

 _I wanna live close to the sun!_

 _Well pack your bags, 'cause I've already won!_

 _Everythin' to prove, nothin' in my way;_

 _I'll get there one day._

 _'Cause I wanna be...famous!_

 _(Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

 _I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

 _I wanna be! I wanna be! I wanna be famous! (Na-na nanananaa, nanana-nanaa, na-nananananaa)_

(Fade to Episode)

xxx

It was night as the episode proper opened, zooming in from a long-distance shot of the island to Noah and Harold walking together. "Gosh, I still can't believe Jasmine's gone," Harold said, his head hung sadly. "She deserved to be in the finale more than anyone."

"Yeah, too bad _you_ messed it up for her," Noah told him in a disinterested voice. "Not that I'm complaining, though. With her out of the picture I have a pretty good chance at _winning_ this stupid game."

Harold stopped in his tracks. "As if," he said, prompting Noah to stop as well and look back. "What can you possibly do to match up to my mad skills? I'm the clear favorite to win if you ask me." He started walking again, and smiled confidently as he passed Noah by.

Noah snorted. "Yeah, and _Chef's_ the favorite to win the Great Canadian Cook-Off," he said as he resumed walking as well. "Like, you know you're a _joke_ , right? Your 'mad skills' don't exist."

"They do _too_ exist!" Harold retorted with a hint of anger. "I mean, I've won, like, _four_ challenges thanks to them, which is more than _you_ can say."

"Wow, yeah, it's almost like I never claimed to be some kind of challenge _prodigy_ in the first place," Noah answered mockingly. "Although even _with_ your so-called skills I'm _still_ the only one of us who's won immunity _alone_ ," he said. Harold stopped in his tracks, and the camera zoomed in on his worried frown as Noah walked off laughing.

His frown became a scowl, and he angrily called out "Oh yeah? Well at least _I_ didn't have to _trick_ any one to get this far!"

He smirked when Noah immediately stopped laughing.

xxx

"Actually, although I radiate confidence on the outside," Harold motioned to himself in front of the confessional camera, the light coming in through the upper windows suggesting that it was now the next day, "on the inside I'm fairly worried," he said with a short, matter-of-fact nod. "See, even though my skills are both more potent _and_ varied than Noah realizes, that might not be enough fro me to claim victory. Between writing those notes and finding the invincibility statue, Noah's proven that he's both crafty _and_ resourceful. Add to that his surprising ruthlessness, and you have a recipe for a worthy contender. I can't afford to let him get in my head, otherwise it's goodbye million dollars, hello eternity of shame."

xxx

"Yeah, I hate to say it," Noah told the outhouse camera, averting his gaze as he began the confessional, "but this is gonna be more of an uphill battle than I'd ever admit to Wonder Boy's face. Total Drama finales tend to be more _physical_ than _mental_ , and Harold actually has an edge there, even if it _is_ paper-thin. Plus, his 'mad skills' make him a bit more unpredictable than I'd like. Who _knows_ what kind of obscure near-talents he could have been hiding all season."

He had been shrugging all through his final sentence, and as he moved to lower his arms a sudden loud fanfare outside startled him into flailing his arms and falling off his seat.

xxx

The fanfare continued as the scene cut to a pair of long, straight, Roman tubas adorned with flags bearing the face of Chris McLean. They were pointed towards the sunny sky and played by the pony-tailed female and long-banged male interns, a stereo at their feet as they stood with a wary-looking Harold and Noah by the communal washroom. The display served to herald the arrival of Chef, wearing a stereotypical Roman legion helmet, pulling a red-and-gold chariot ridden by Chris, who was naturally dressed as a stereotypical Roman emperor.

"All hail mighty McLean!" the host declared in a dramatic voice as his chariot came to a stop in front of the Final Two.

Noah and Harold shared an odd look. "Yeah, I'll pass," Noah said dryly.

"What's with the Ancient Roman garb?" Harold asked.

"You'll see," Chris said impishly before looking to the side and calling out "Slave! Bring me my mystic seeing glass," in the same dramatic voice as his previous declaration.

Moments later the camera zoomed out to show the arrival of a widescreen television on a cart pushed by the fat male intern, who blew his boss a raspberry as he passed. "Hey!" Chris said in outrage before shrugging and smiling. "You know what? In Ancient Rome blowing a raspberry was a show of respect!"

"No it wasn't," Harold corrected, the television cart now set up next to him and the interns out-of-sight.

" _Anywho_ ," Chris said with an annoyed shrug, "as a reward for making it all the way to the finale, you each get _thirty seconds_ to speak to a loved one back home."

Both boys perked up in excitement. "Whoa, _awesome_!" Harold said before the television switched on to show a live feed of a burly white man with short dark red hair and a bristly mustache. He wore a dark red polo shirt, and was sitting on a faded green couch in front of a pale wall decorated with numerous pictures. " _Dad_?!" Harold gasped in shock, but quickly smiled. "I wasn't expecting to see _you_!"

The man laughed, deeply and heartily. "Well, I'm on leave this month so your mother decided I should give the next generation of Harold McGradys a pep talk. I gotta say, I was a little _surprised_ to hear that you'd made it all the way to the finale, son," the younger Harold's smile faltered a little, "but I'm glad to see all those expensive, uh, _camps_ and _programs_ we enrolled you in are finally paying off. Can't say I understand half of you've decided to do with your life, but it looks like you're finally gonna become a man. Just remember," he barked with a sudden sternness that made his son nervous, "your name is the name of _winners_!" The younger Harold puffed out his chest in pride. "So don't back down, don't give up, and for once in your life keep going until you're number _one_!" The dweeb deflated slightly. "Do me proud, son," Harold McGrady IV finished with a nod of action.

"I will, dad," Harold McGrady V replied with a nod of his own before the feed cut to static and then cut out entirely. He let out a breath shortly after, and sagged slightly.

"Wow, that's your dad, huh?" Noah asked. "Seems like a real tough guy."

"He is," Harold replied. "The resemblance between us goes without saying, but I've never really felt like he totally respects my accomplishments. Hopefully I'll finally be able to prove how skilled I am, not only to him but to all the other people who've ever laughed at me."

"Good luck with that," Noah said, stepping forward as Harold stepped back. "Just don't expect any sympathy from me."

It was then that the widescreen cut to static, and then to a brief glimpse of a pale blue room before a large Labrador retriever rose up close to the camera, licked the lens, and barked eagerly. "Heheh, down boy," Noah said, cracking a warm smile.

The dog withdrew from the camera obediently, and an Indian woman with shoulder-length hair in a red blouse, brown vest, and capris crouched down next down it. "Sorry, Noah," she greeted with a warm smile of her own, "Charlie was just so excited to see you again."

"What else is new, mom?" Noah quipped shrugged. "I take it Charlie's operation went okay?"

The dog in question barked happily. "Yup," Noah's mother said, rubbing the dog affectionately. "Charlie's the picture of health now."

"Cool," Noah smiled. "Feel free to send me the bill once I win."

His mother laughed and shook her head. "You know you don't have to do that, it wasn't _that_ expensive," she told him before suddenly frowning. "Of course...we still don't have the money set aside to help you out once you go off to college," she said in a worried, almost apologetic tone.

Noah sighed. "I know, mom, don't worry. That's why I came _on_ this show, remember?"

"I know, sweetie," his mother smiled. "We're all rooting for you to win. I love you," she quickly waved, "goodbye!" The feed ended there, and the shot focused back on Noah as he ended his own waved, then looked down and let out his breath.

He looked up to see Harold, Chris, and Chef staring at him. "What?" he asked in irritation. "I'm the youngest of _nine_ , money's been tight my whole life. This stupid competition is my best shot at affording the future I want with _out_ working some dead-end job for a twenty years."

"Hey, if today doesn't work out for you," Chris told him with an almost mocking smile, "there's a position open as my personal assistant."

Noah glared at him.

xxx

"Yeah, like I'd ever stoop _that_ low," Noah confessed irritably, crossing his arms and glancing towards the door before relaxing slightly. "Although, I _am_ kind of surprised how great it was to see my mom and dog again after however many weeks I've been out here. I guess there's no bigger motivation than being reminded of who and what you're fighting for," he smirked confidently.

xxx

The static cut away to show that Noah and Harold had gotten on the chariot behind Chris, which was being pulled once more by Chef. "So where are we off to today?" Harold asked eagerly. "Mount Looming Tragedy? The Bay of Dismay? Oh, or how about the Pet Cemetery again?"

"Nah, somewhere _waaaay_ more dangerous," the host replied, spreading his arms excitedly and earning a wary look from the finalists. "For the most _painful_ Total Drama finale competition _ev-er_! Gentleman," he said in his dramatic 'imperial' voice, "behold, the _Chrisiseum_!"

A grandiose fanfare began to play as he pointed ahead, and the two boys gasped before the perspective shifted to show their destination: a massive coliseum with wooden walls and high flat arches; the central entryway incorporated magenta curtains, tall stacks of toxic waste barrels as supports, and the tail fin of the former Total Drama Jumbo Jet with the Chris McLean insignia intact and prominent.

/

The fanfare continued as the scene cut inside to a high covered box seating area, where Chris was flanked by the same two interns playing Roman tubas as before. He smiled for a few seconds, then glance to the side and pressed a button on a nearby stereo, shutting off the fanfare and leaving the interns sputtering pathetically into their instruments. They lowered them in shame, and Chris stood up.

"Finalists, say what's up to your _cheering section_ ," he opened, the camera following his point downward to reveal a three-tiered section of seats where the season's former contestants were already seated. "From the Mutant Maggots," the camera zoomed in on the left side of the top row, "Zoey! Jasmine!" The indie girl smiled and waved to the finalists below, then looked expectantly at the survivalist who just frowned levelly, then looked to the side. "Trent! Lindsay!" The musician smiled sheepishly under Jasmine's glare, then gulped and looked away as the camera panned onto the blonde, who smiled and waved at the camera. "Aaand, _Justin_ ," the host finished, the pan across the row ending on the male model, who was busy looking at his own reflection in a hand mirror.

"And the _Toxic Rats_ ," Chris continued, the shot briefly cutting back to him before following his motion back down to the second row. "Leonard! Izzy!" The LARPer merely smiled, while the wild child grinned widely and excitedly waved a pair of right arms. "Gwen! Cody!" The goth smirked, but it faded into annoyance as the flirt shot a finger pistol her way. "Cameron! Aaand, _Courtney_!" The bubble-boy was another who simply smiled for the camera, but the former CIT crossed her arms and huffed in righteous indignation.

The shot cut outward to show the two finalists standing on the bare dirt of the Chrisiseum floor while the losers began to cheer – Zoey and Lindsay and Leonard for Harold; Gwen and Cody and Cameron for Noah; and Izzy just in general. Courtney, Justin, and even Trent and Jasmine remained silent.

"Wow," Noah said with a pleased smirk, "wasn't expecting so many people to actually side with me." He looked Harold and noticed him silently staring at the crowd, then looked at them again to see Jasmine meeting his gaze...and then closing her eyes and looking away.

Zoey looked from her to the arena and back again. "You're...really still mad at him, aren't you?" she asked her friend, putting a hand on Jasmine's shoulder as she slumped down in her seat.

"If I had lost due to my own decision I'd be able to accept not being down there with him," Jasmine said, "but instead it was _his_ fault that I lost. I just don't know if I'll ever be able to forgive him for it."

"Well," Gwen said as the camera panned down and over to her, "I hope you'll at least be able to forgive someone _else_." She looked up expectantly at Trent, who was twiddling his fingers nervously under the gazes of both his girlfriend and Jasmine.

Gwen cleared her throat sternly, prompting the musician to sigh, rub the back of his head in embarrassment, and turn to Jasmine. "Look, I'm really sorry about what I did during the air challenge," he said. "I went totally _overboard_ with the revenge thing, and I ended up going way far out of line. I could've gotten both of us seriously hurt in my sheer _stupidity_. I just..," he looked down briefly before giving Jasmine a pleading look, "I just hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me."

Jasmine looked at him for a moment, then let out her breath and turned to face out into the arena again, slumping back into her seat. "Fine...I guess...," she said dully, nevertheless earning smiles from both Zoey and Trent, the latter getting pulled down by the collar by Gwen so she could kiss him on the cheek, which in turn earned a cheesy grin from Izzy and a strangely approving nod from Cody.

"So, who are you rooting for?" Zoey leaned over to ask Trent as the camera panned back up to the top row.

"Good question," Trent answered, looking forward thoughtfully. "A big part of me wants to cheer for Harold so he knows I'm not mad at him anymore for voting me out, but even with all the stuff Noah's done I still gotta appreciate how he stood by me all the way to the end."

Courtney sniffed haughtily, drawing the camera's attention to the end of the second row. "Well _I_ don't intend on cheering for _either_ of those _traitors_ ," she said, leveling a glare down at the arena that was met in turn by dull, annoyed looks from both finalists.

"Same here," Justin chimed in, the shot panning up to show him still admiring himself. "I don't wanna cheer for _anyone_."

"Oh, I think you _will_ cheer," Chris corrected, the music turning slightly tense as the focus panned up to him – and the remote control he was now holding. "Otherwise, I'll be forced to unleash... _him_!" He pressed the button on his remote, and with a mechanical whir Fang rose up into the third row of the seating area, a metal collar and leash around his neck. He barred a toothy grin, and the former contestants gasped – except for Izzy, who grinned and giggled.

"Hi, Fang! Long time no see!" she said with a happy wave that was met by an angry growl from the mutant shark, who absentmindedly felt the gap still present in his front row of teeth.

"Any questions?" Chris asked smugly.

"...go Noah," Courtney cheered bitterly.

"Go...Harold, I guess?" Justin added uncertainly.

The two finalists smirked.

"On with the main event," Chris announced, drawing the camera's attention back to him. "The final challenge of the season is," he stood up and folded his hands behind his back, "a one-on-one Gladiator _Battle Royale_!" The shot pulled back to show the cheering section below him and the two finalists looking upward. "But first, you'll need to use your _imaginations_ to make armor and weapons, in a challenge I like to call ' _Make It_ , or _Break It_ '!" A flatter version of the usual grandiose theme played as the task was named.

"You'll need tools and materials to build your armor and weapons," the host continued. "And we've got 'em, rrrright here!" He motioned towards the arena floor, the camera cutting to several objects lying on the ground together – a blow torch, a magnifying glass, various hammers and wrenches, tacks, a roll of duct tape, a dead fish, and a bowling ball.

"I call the blow torch!" Harold called out, the shot panning up and right to him and Noah. "A heat source like that should proof useful," he told his unimpressed opponent.

"That's not all!" Chris added impishly. "Oh, _Cheee~ef!_ " he called out, the cheering section gasping in shock as they noticed a helicopter approaching. Chef lowered it over the arena, and the camera zoomed in on the massive dumpster hanging upside down below it. The lid opened suddenly, dumping the assorted garbage inside onto the useful items below causing Harold and Noah to groan in annoyance. "THANK YOU, CHEF!" the host called and waved out to his assistant, who nodded slightly and flew away.

"You have fifteen minutes to collect useful bits of crud from Mount Junkmore," Chris explained over a shot of the two finalists looking at the trash heap they'd been given then turning back towards the stands, "and assemble your arsenal. But watch your step," he warned with a smile, sitting back onto his throne. "I _may_ have loaded the dumpster with a ton of _booby-traps_." He laughed with anticipatory glee, causing Harold and Noah to flinch and exchange a wary look.

"Aaand," Chris finished, snapping his fingers. The shot panned over to the ponytailed female intern who eagerly pressed play on the stereo...only to frown as it played a jaunty sea shanty, then press rewind and play again so that a loud gong rung out from it. She smiled sheepishly at her boss, who glared at her briefly before turning his smile towards the arena. " _Go_!" he declared.

The music immediately became tense as the two boys made a dash for the junk pile, slapping at each other while the losers cheered on their preferred nerd. Harold reached the pile first, however, with Noah running past while he lifted a large metal car spoiler off the pile with a grunt of effort. He was rewarded by a sudden blast of disgusting-looking gas from the pile that left him coughing and hacking. "Aaagh, _gross_! Stink bomb!" Harold said as he stumbled backward out of the cloud, nearly dropping the piece of scavenged metal in the process. With a startled near-yelp as the gas cloud dissipated he regained his hold just before it fell to the ground, and he drug the piece of metal off to the side.

The gallery continued to cheer as he ran back towards the pile. "You can do it, Harold!" Zoey called out, rising from her seat and cupping her hands around her mouth.

"Yeah...," Jasmine added halfheartedly.

"C'mon, Noah!" Cameron cheered next, the camera focusing in on the other end of the stands. "Grab that computer!" The shot briefly cut to a laptop sitting open near a speedboat Noah was searching on the other side of the pile.

"Why?" Courtney asked in confusion as the shot cut back to her and Cameron. "How could that _possibly_ help him?"

"He could build a suit of computerized power armor," Cameron explained, earning an odd and disbelieving look from his former teammate. "It's what I would do," he said before looking back at the action.

The shot cut back to Noah as he stood up in the speedboat with a fire extinguisher in one hand and the blow torch in the other. " _Perfect_ ," he smiled.

"Hey!" Harold objected, drawing the attention of Noah and the camera to the other side of the junk heap where the dweeb stood . "I called _dibs_ on that blow torch!"

"Too _bad_ , Dorkenheimer," Noah replied. "I got to it first, so it's mine." He laughed a little as he jumped off the boat, landing on a pile of trash bags and a discarded hazmat suit...and getting blown off the pile by a sudden explosion.

Those who had been cheering for him winced in sympathy, and as he stood groaning and blackened a few bits of debris rained down around him, including a tennis racket that hit him on the head and knocked him backward.

"Hah! Serves you right, _blow_ _torch-stealer_!" Harold taunted, the camera panning back to the right to show him using a section of pipe like a crowbar to pry apart the boat's engine. As he laughed at his foe's misfortune he managed to wedge the pipe into the outboard motor...only to get electrocuted for his trouble. He fell over groaning in pain, landing in front of a cannon that promptly went off. Harold yelped and flattened himself to the ground and closed his eyes in fear, just fast enough for the cannonball to go over him entirely and crash into the far wall of the Chrisiseum.

Chris laughed as Harold tentatively opened his eyes and looked up. "Al _right_!" the host said. "Those booby traps were _such_ a good idea!"

"Goooo, Harold!" Lindsay cheered excitedly. "You can do it!"

"Try not to embarrass us, Harold!" Justin added.

The shot cut to Harold as he got to his feet and grabbed a trashcan lid, then panned back across the pile to Noah as he pulled at a length of chain that seemed to be stuck in the rubble. When the mounds of trash bags and sheet metal finally shifted enough to free its end, he toppled backwards off the pile with a startled yelp. Several more clips followed as the focus switched from one competitor to the other, showing Harold as he hammered what looked like a large soup pot into the shape of a kabuto-like helmet, and put it on with pride. " _Awesome_ ," he grinned as the camera pulled back to show that he was already wearing several other pieces of Japanese-like armor made from large plays of riveted metal and trashcan lids. Noah was next as he donned the helmet of the hazmat suit, then used the blowtorch to weld the end of the chain he'd looped through a tire back on to itself.

Harold hammered down on another piece of sheet metal, then Noah slid the fire extinguisher he'd found into what appeared to be a tattered old golf bag, then tapped his chin and slid in the tennis racket that had hit him as well. Next, Harold finished carving a wooden plank into what appeared to be a crude wooden katana using a small piece of metal. He raised it high above him with pride, the camera showing it against the sunny sky as a traditional-Japanese-sounding jingle played in the background. It gave way for a fast-paced drumming, however, as Harold swiftly lowered it into a dramatic fighting stance and smirked darkly, the shot cutting over to a one-legged mannequin standing nearby. The nerdy samurai charged forward with an odd battle cry, and the scene changed to black silhouettes of him and his target against a brilliant white background as he made a leaping slash, and landed behind it.

The lighting returned to normal as the perspective moved to Harold's front, as he stood up from a crouched position and looked to the side at the mannequin standing behind him. It fell over. " _Boo-yah_ ," Harold grinned.

Noah was next, tying a piece of cloth that looked to have been torn from the hazmat suit into a small pouch, then tucking it next to several similar pouches in a makeshift belt that appeared to have been made from the torn-off sleeves of the same suit.

A gong played on the stereo, which was quickly shut off by the female intern. "Aaaand, time is _up_!" Chris announced, a grand tune playing as he stood from his throne. "Finalists, take your positions for the _ultimate_ Total Drama showdown! Last man standing _wins_ , One! Million! _Dol-lars!_ "

Harold stepped forward first, the camera panning up from his sneakers to his helmet, showing his nearly full suit of armor and his wooden sword. "You're looking great, Harold!" Zoey called out from off-screen.

"Give him heck, dude!" Trent added.

"Smite him, o mighty warrior!" Leonard finished.

Harold crouched solemnly, then rose his sword up and declared "For _honor_!"

The shot cut to the stands as Jasmine let out a breath and nodded, earning a glance from Zoey and Trent. "Alright Harold, time to prove you made it this far for _more_ than just being the smaller threat," she muttered, causing those on either side of her to look forward again with a hint of concern on their faces.

A pan down to the former Rats showed Izzy grinning, while Leonard and Gwen smiled expectantly. "Okay, is this gonna be awesome or what?" she asked excitedly, looking from one one side to the other.

"Certainly," Leonard declared in affirmation. "But surely mighty Harold has this won?"

"I wouldn't be so sure," Gwen smirked as the perspective moved behind Harold, sliding to the side to show him facing a rather bored-looking Noah. The slacker was wearing nothing unusual aside from his new belt and golf bag, though he had stowed what looked like a few short pipes in the latter and attached a few cords to it as well. "Noah looks like he has a plan."

"Nice armor," the schemer quipped. "What kid's show did you get it from?"

"None," Harold answered proudly, "it's my own personal design. I learned all about blacksmithing at Medieval Steve's Medieval Camp."

"It really shows," Noah said, still with his usual dryness.

Harold puffed up haughtily. "I know you're being sarcastic, but it won't work on me. My armor is both sturdy enough to take a hit, and flexible so I can retain my mobility. Plus, check out my _sweet_ replica samurai sword," he said, snorting and laughing as he motioned at his weapon. "I was gonna make it out of metal, but I didn't wanna hurt you _too_ bad."

"Wow, how thoughtful," Noah replied, still looking bored. "I'm quivering in my boots."

"You should be," Harold nodded cockily. "Especially considering you barely have _anything_ to protect yourself with. I mean, how do you expect to defend against a _samurai_?" he asked, motioning over his armor again.

"Meh," the slacker shrugged, "I'm not that scared of a _stick_ and some metal plates. You look like you're walking around in the locker some _meathead_ shoved you in to."

" _Hey_!" the armored dork cried in offense.

Noah finally cracked a smirk. "Feel free to prove otherwise," he taunted. "That is, if you _can_." He reached into his golf bag and pulled out a length of pipe, then smacked it lightly against his open hand. His supporters cheered.

"This is gonna be good," Chris laughed as the camera panned around Noah's back, showing Harold glaring him down as a radical techno tune played. "The _ultimate_ battle brutale!" he declared as the shot cut back up to him. "Find out what happens when we return, on Total! Drama! Rrrrevenge of the _Island_!" An ominous chant punctuated each successive outward cut, going from his top box, to the entire stands, to the entire arena, and lastly to the entire island.

(Fade to Commercial and Back)

Rumbling were filling the sky as the episode resumed, a dramatic score rising up under the cheers of the former players as the shot cut to the Chrisiseum, and then to the stands.

"It's the _final_ challenge of the season," Chris announced, "a gladiator battle to _end_ all gladiator battles!"

"Prepare to _lose_ ," Harold told his opponent, the camera panning behind his to show Noah looking unimpressed. "For I fight to reclaim the honor of my friends, and my _self_ ," the dweeb added, making a dramatic fist as the camera showed him through Noah's legs.

"Don't act all high-and-mighty, Haroldmoto," Noah replied as the shot showed him from over Harold's shoulder. "I've got people I'm fighting for too, and I'm _not_ backing down." Harold was shown from over Noah's shoulder, frowning as the schemer finished speaking.

"I believe _I_ was speaking?" Chris interrupted in annoyance. "Save the trash talk for the battle. Oh, and in the grand Total Drama tradition, there are gonna be a few _obstacles_ to deal with, including a whole lot more junk that I decided to have dumped around the place to spice things up. Everything _else_ I will release into the ring...whenever I feel like it."

"Hey, no complaints here," Noah smirked, causing Harold to raise a brow in confusion.

He shrugged. "I vow to defeat _all_ challengers!" he declared to the host.

"The match ends when one gladiator pins the other for three seconds," Chris continued without acknowledging the outburst.

"Heh," the junkyard samurai said confidently, "that's all? Three seconds is _easy_."

"Once again, no complaints," Noah added. "Looks like I was worried about a tough win condition for nothing!"

"Yeah, probably 'cause you would never win if it were a second more," Harold taunted, causing Noah to scowl.

"Aaaand, _go_!" Chris announced, the music quickly rising up to an appropriate level of danger and intensity as the two nerds locked narrow eyes and gripped their weapons.

The shot cut to Harold's sneakers as he charged forward, uttering his gravelly, warbling battle cry to the cheers of his supporters. "Face my blade, villain!" he declared, raising his sword and slashing down at Noah.

"No thanks, I'm good," Noah replied, using both hands to block the wooden sword with his metal pipe. Harold retaliated with a sudden step forward and thrust, hitting Noah in the chest and forcing him back a step. The nerdy samurai followed up with an upward slash that his foe managed to block again, this time taking a step back preemptively.

"You know it's only a matter of time before I strike you down, right?" Harold asked as the perspective cut to the view from the host's box, the man himself stepping in front of the camera as he watched the two young men struggle.

"Time for a close encounter of the _mutant_ kind!" Chris declared, smugly pressing the button on his remote. "Finalists," he called out, catching the attention of Harold long enough for Noah to shove him away with his pipe, "get ready for your _next_ opponent! It's an old friend I'm sure you're both well acquainted with." The camera panned from Noah, down to Harold, and then over to a gate in the far wall which slid up to reveal the giant mutant beetle mother, standing on its hind legs and wearing a single boxing glove. It quickly breathed a jet of fire, and scuttled forward with a menacing hiss.

The shot cut back to the two boys, both looking wary and Harold still on the ground. "Yeah, how 'bout _you_ take this one," Noah told him. "Put that armor to the test while I just go _away_ from the fire-breathing bug monster." He darted off without another word.

"Huh?" Harold asked, looking back up at him only to see that Noah had already disappeared. " _Hey_!" he said in outrage before a sudden jet of fire forced him to jump to the side.

The shot cut to the former Maggots shouting their encouragement, with Cody of all people joining in. "C'mon, Harold! Kick that mutant's _butt_!" he stood up and called out.

"Uhh, shouldn't you be rooting for _Noah_?" Gwen asked him.

"Heheh," Cody shrugged and chuckled sheepishly. "What can I say? I kinda dig the samurai thing."

The music picked up slightly as the scene returned to Harold and the beetle, the latter punching over and over while the former kept blocking with his sword and backing up. In moments he found himself up against the wall of the arena, and when he looked to the side to confirm the beetle finally landed a blow on his chestplate. Despite the armor it was strong enough to earn a grunt from Harold, but the junkyard samurai was able to duck under the next blow and strike back with a diagonal slash from his wooden blade. This was enough to knock the beetle back, which in turn gave Harold the opportunity to strike back with several more slashes that managed to knock the mutant over.

" _Yes_ ," he said, pumping his fist confidently. "How do you like _that_?" He was answered by a furious jet of fire-breath, but with the beetle on its back it was unable to actually hit him – though Harold ducked nervously all the same, he quickly stood up smiling and unscathed. He tore a the flattened trashcan lids from its place as a shoulder plate and tossed it like a disc at the supine mutant; it hissed and squealed upon getting hit in the head, but soon fell unconscious with its head and legs flopping down.

Harold let out a breath of relief as the crowd cheered. "Alright, that's taken care of. But where's Noah?" he asked, looking up. The camera followed his gaze as it panned across the arena, taking in the several scattered piles of junk that had been left as booby-trapped obstacles.

"Come on Noah, get out here and fight like a _man_!" Courtney yelled angrily from the stands.

"That doesn't seem every supportive," Cameron told her.

"Well how _else_ is he gonna win this?" Courtney replied.

The music became louder as the scene moved back to Harold walking warily through the junk-filled coliseum, his weaponized shoulder plate back in place. "Come out, come out, wherever you are!" he called out, getting a quick reply in the form of a small yellow bag hitting him in an exposed patch of arm, breaking open on impact and dousing the arm with a foul green liquid. "Ahh! Ahh! _Gross_ , what _is_ this stuff?!" Harold said, flailing his arm in panic.

"Garbage drippings," Noah called out, the camera cutting over to show him standing near the top of one of the piles with his tennis racket resting on his shoulder, another of his bags being tossed in the other hand. "And there's plenty more where that came from!" he said, tossing the bag into the air and smacking it with the racket. The camera followed it through the air, and this one managed to hit Harold in the face while he was too shocked to dodge.

"Aagh! Aagh!" he spluttered, quickly trying to wipe the fluid away. "This is disgusting! Wait til I get my hands on you, Noah!"

"I'd like to see you try, shogun boy!" Noah replied mockingly, jumping down behind the junk heap with a laugh.

Harold scowled and scrambled up after him, but halfway up he was blown away by a hidden explosive. He landed on his back in the dirt, and quickly earned both the attention and the mocking laughter of Noah, the camera sliding ninety degrees to the right to show him on the ground on the other side of the pile. "Hey, you should _totally_ keep trying to climb the piles," he taunted. "Maybe the next one _won't_ be booby-trapped!"

He ran off again, and the shot cut up to the host's box as Chris sighed in boredom. "Yawn. I wanted a _gladiator_ match, not this." He pressed the button on his remote control, and a circular hole opened up in the ground, the two dirt-covered doors that had been covering it sliding aside with a mechanical whir.

Noah's eyebrows shot up as he realized he was running right towards it, and he gaped in terror as a massive mutant alligator with tentacles for arms rose up out of it and roared at him. He screamed and turned to flee, but the beast reached out and grabbed him. Then, as Harold ran up and gasped in horror, the alligator chomped down on the screaming rogue just off-camera.

"Oh, I can't watch," Zoey cringed, covering her eyes.

"You really should," Chris leaned down to tell her. "The ratings on this are gonna be _crrraaaaazy_!"

The shot cut back to the alligator's head as Noah let out a muffled cry of "Let _go_ of me you overgrown pair of shoes!"

"Yeah!" Harold chimed in, the camera panning down to show him striking at the alligator's belly with his sword to no effect. It just kept on chewing, until something inside its mouth seemed to break and give it pause. It grimaced in disgust, then opened its mouth dropping Noah onto Harold. It frantically tried to wipe the foul green liquid off its tongue, and the camera panned down to the two boys.

"Well, there goes the rest of _those_ ," Noah said in annoyance, getting back to his feet.

"Good riddance," Harold replied, standing up as well.

They spent a moment brushing themselves off, but a tentacle tapping on Harold's shoulder got both their attention, and they looked up right into the mutant alligator's roar. " _RUN_!" Noah yelled as he dashed back out of the way, but Harold was too slow and got grabbed by the mutant.

It raised the dweeby samurai up to eye level and growled, prompting Harold to grin sheepishly. "Uh, hey, you know those sword slashes were _friendly_ , right? Heheh..."

The alligator replied with a point-blank roar.

"Drop the nerd, scaley!" Noah called out suddenly, earning the attention of the other two 'fighters'. The shot cut to him standing nearby with the end of a chain in hand, breathing heavily. He huffed, then began to spin around over his head, revealing the tire tied to the end in the process. The alligator squinted in suspicion as its former prey built up more and more speed with his new weapon, finally throwing it forward and letting it carry a large amount of slack with it. It quickly coiled around the massive mutant, pinning its tentacles to its side even as the tire swung around and hooked onto its jaws, forcing them shut. It promptly dropped Harold, who managed to land on his feet and thrust his sword into the mutant's foot. The beast raised the foot in pain, and a surprisingly strong pull from Noah managed to bring it crashing down to the ground. It growled and struggled against its bonds, but a strange cry from Harold and a sharp strike over the eyes managed to knock it out.

The two boys regrouped, panting heavily. "Well, there goes my _first_ choice of finishing moves," Noah said in annoyance.

"Do you even have any tricks left?" Harold asked.

Noah replied by pulling a cord and spraying him in the face with the fire extinguisher he'd been carrying in his golf bag, the resulting cloud taking over the scene as he ran off cackling to himself. The powder dispersed in seconds to show Harold waving his hand and coughing. "I guess so," he said before taking a step and immediately freezing with a wide-eyed grimace on his face. A dramatic riff played as he hollered in pain, revealing the tacks on the ground around him. The camera zoomed in as he lifted his foot and removed a tack from it, then zoomed back out as he scowled. "Is this all you have?" he called out angrily. "Just a bunch of stuff to try and wear me down?"

"Well, that and distract you while I ready my _big_ guns," Noah replied cockily, Harold gasping as the camera quick-panned over to his nemesis...leaning against the cannon that had nearly shot the dweeb earlier. "Give up and let me pin you," Noah said, suddenly serious, "or we'll have to test how strong that armor of yours _really_ is!"

"No way!" Harold replied, raising his sword defiantly as the background music picked up in intensity. Noah replied in turn with a cannon blast, which forced the nerdy samurai to yelp and pirouette to the side – causing the cannonball to fly past him into the stands to the shock of those sitting there. It hit the chain that Fang was tied to, breaking it and continuing on the punch a hole in the back wall of the lowest seating section.

A second shot went low, Harold gracefully leaping over it with a cocky smile. "Just stay _still_!" Noah said, aiming the cannon higher before the third shot went off. This one flew towards the top box, forcing Chris and his two interns to dive away in panic – but the host happened to toss his remote control into the ball's flight path as he made his escape, and the device was shattered on impact along with his throne.

"Uh-oh," Chris said, standing back up and giving the sparking and smoking remains of his remote a fearful look.

The circular door in the ground opened back up even wider, and the camera backed away from a shot of the two boys and the cannon as they saw a veritable horde of mutants rise up out of the ground all at once: multiple mutant gophers, a mutant turtle, a spiny mutant beaver, the squid-tree, a laser squirrel, and Larry all glaring down at the two humans. Larry roared, and the perspective inverted to show the two boys screaming, and the stands in the background filled with shocked and worried faces.

xxx

" _Larry_...," Jasmine told the outhouse camera, narrowing her eyes darkly.

xxx

"Aww, I wonder if my _gopher_ buddies missed me?" Izzy asked excitedly.

xxx

"I'm...kinda glad I never had to meet those things face-to-face before now, heheh," Cody admitted nervously.

xxx

The music quickly became dramatic again as the laser squirrel shot at the stands, forcing those in them to scream and scatter before the blast blew up a good chunk of the seats. The shot cut to the arena floor as Trent and Gwen fled in the foreground while Izzy fled in the background, before skidding to a stop at the sound of Cameron and Cody's screams. She looked back over to see the two boys with their backs against the wall being menaced by Fang, who grinned his toothy grin as he slowly walked towards them.

" _Hey_!" Izzy yelled sharply, getting the mutant shark's attention. "Remember _this_?" she said, the camera rotating behind Fang to show Izzy standing several yards away, the shot focusing in to show her holding the shark's tooth she'd accidentally taken in the season's second episode in her upper-right hand while upper-left and lower-right got into a martial arts stance and lower-left waved Fang forward. "Come and get it, big boy," Izzy said.

Fang snarled and charged towards her as the background music was taken over by a low drumming. The mutant shark pounced, but Izzy jumped over him and landed on his back, forcing him into the dirt as she jumped off. He growled and stood back up and looked around for her, only for his eyes to go wide as she launched into a strange, frantic, ululating battle cry and landed a flying kick to his belly that knocked him back several yards.

She landed on her feet and laughed proudly, only to gasp when Fang pounced back onto her from off-screen.

The drumming music faded back into the usual fast-paced challenge theme as the shot cut to Harold and Noah, who were now clashing sword-on-racket at the base of a junk pile. "Dude, shouldn't we, I don't know, deal with the mutants _first_ or something?" Noah asked as his adversary pushed him into higher ground with repeated sword blows.

"And let you get away again?" Harold replied. "Get real!" He swiped Noah's legs out from under him, causing the boy to slide back down the pile next to him. But before he could capitalize a laser blast grazed the side of his arm, cutting the straps holding the armor plates in place. He looked back over his shoulder in anger to see the squirrel laughing at him, then scurrying off. Harold turned back around towards his opponent, but was quickly met by a blow to the chest as Noah threw himself at the armored dork, sending knocking both to the ground.

"Aren't you even gonna save your _friends_?!" Noah asked before Harold rolled him off. "Isn't that what you decided to do _last_ time?"

"Yeah, and look how _that_ turned out," Harold said as both boys got to their feet, a few more plates of armor falling from the junkyard samurai's right arm. "So this time I've decided to _trust_ them to take care of themselves!"

He swung at Noah with his sword again, but the rogue managed to sidestep the slash. "Gee, I'm sure they'll _love_ hearing that!" he said scathingly, blasting the warrior with the fire extinguisher again and running off.

The shot cut to the top box, where Chris was now being cornered by several mutant gophers. "The biohazardous waste was _Chef's_ idea!" the host cried out defensively as the giant rodents closed around him, squealing angrily. "If you gotta chew someone's face off, chew _his_!" They moved in even further, forcing him to scream "HEEEEELP!" as he sank below their bodies.

A massive root-limb suddenly swept the gophers away, revealing the host crouched down with his hands on his head. He opened his eyes at the sound of a crash, and the shot cut backward to show Larry standing on the bottom wall of the empty seating area. He roared in triumph, prompting Chris to stand and smile in the direction his assailants had been thrown. "That's extra fertilizer for _you_ tonight," he told his monstrous pet, the massive flytrap rubbing the host with its head as a touching tune played. "Awww, now go out there and terrorize some _loser_ contestants," he told it with a rub and a pat.

He lifted his head and roared again, only to cut it short into a sort of startled gurgle as he was suddenly pulled downward. "Yeah, how about _not_ ," Jasmine said, the shot cutting outward to show her pulling the giant mutant down off the stands by one of its smaller root-limbs. Chris gasped in shock as Larry slammed down to the ground, and Jasmine gave him a strong kick in his central mass of dirt and roots. "You aren't gonna be terrorizing _anyone_ ," she said confidently as the music became strangely triumphant.

"That's right, fella," Justin said as the scene moved to him, now shirtless as he led the mutant beaver around. "You don't wanna hurt _this_ , do you?" he asked, motioning to his glistening chest causing the beaver, hearts in its eyes, to nod dreamily. "Didn't think so," Justin said smoothly. "But I heard _that_ guy does," he said, motioning over to the squid-tree which seemed to be preoccupied by a tug-of-war with Zoey over a screaming Lindsay. The mutant beaver snarled and charged at it, knocking it to the ground and allowing Zoey to pull her friend to safety.

The shot cut to Courtney, who was running away from the mutant squirrel as it happily shot its lasers at her. Until, that is, she narrowed her eyes and stopped in her tracks. "Okay, I've had about enough of _you_ ," she said sharply, turning around and kicking the hairless thing away. It bounced off the head of the mutant turtle, which had been looming over Leonard, Gwen, and Trent, but now turned and growled angrily at the young woman who had unintentionally assaulted it.

Courtney trembled in fear as it stomped towards her, but just as she started to scream the turtle was knocked to the side as Fang flew into it. Courtney, Leonard, Gwen, and Trent turned shocked looks to the side, the camera panning to see Izzy brushing two sets of hands off. "Don't you _dare_ mess with us!" she yelled, repeating her strange battle cry as she jumped and flipped forward, landing on the fallen turtle's dazed head. She grinned as she sprouted a third pair of arms, and began to pummel the creature to the cheers of those she'd saved.

A pan put the camera back on Noah, watching the scene unfold with shock from nearby another junk pile. "Geez, maybe Harold was on to something...," he said before a shadow fell on him, the oddly triumphant music fading out as the tense challenge music resumed once more.

He gasped in shock and looked up at the pile behind him, the perspective moving behind him to show the silhouette of his opponent standing high above him. "You know it!" he said with a grin before jumping down and slashing towards Noah. The rogue grunted in irritation and scrambled out of the way, just before Harold landed with a metallic clatter and a pained groan.

He fumbled for the nozzle of his extinguisher as his foe lay stunned, but was unable to get it to work. "Come on you stupid thing, you can't be empty already!" he said frantically, squeezing the trigger again and again to no effect.

Harold pushed himself up by his hands and shook the stars out of his head, then got back to his feet with the rest of his armor save his helmet sliding off as he did so. "A-ha! I've _finally_ got you!" he declared, swiping at Noah with his wooden sword. The schemer was struck in the left arm and fell to the ground with a pained shout, but quickly pulled the tennis racket from the bag on his back and used it to intercept the next slash and get back to his feet as the two weapons pressed against one another.

The scene cut to Gwen as she backed away warily to the left away from an advancing mutant gopher, then over to Courtney backing away similarly to the right from another gopher. The two girls bumped into each other, looked over their shoulders to briefly lock eyes, then looked away with a sniff and a huff and a scowl apiece. The shot zoomed out to show that the two gophers had cornered them, but their shock quickly faded as they both yelled out and kicked the rodent they were facing – Gwen's in the chin, Courtney's in the nose. Another few kicks got the gophers to turn and flee, squealing in fear, with the two young women now giving chase.

A further zoom caught another pair of rather terrified mutant gophers being chased through the arena by Cameron of all people, who was holding on tight to the dazed squirrel forcing it to use its lasers on its mutant brethren. The bubble-boy was followed closely by Trent, Cody, and Leonard, the three boys brandishing their arms and yelling as they helped chase the mutants around. They passed Justin and the feuding beaver and squid-tree, who had their attention drawn just in time to see the mutant turtle slamming into them. "Take _that_ , you overgrown bottom-dweller!" Izzy yelled out after it, shaking a fist menacingly while another pair of hands brushed themselves off.

" _Whoa_ ," Justin said, looking from her to the three unconscious mutants in shock. "Great work, Izzy. Guess these mutants aren't so tough after all."

To his shock, Larry's head slammed down next to him as if in reply, his flower-tipped 'tongue' lolling out of his leafy maw. "Once you stand up to 'em, anyway," Jasmine said, the camera panning over to show her holding the monster plant's stem-neck tight under her arm. A pair of cheers caused the shot to zoom out, revealing Zoey and Lindsay sitting on top the fallen plant's main mass, high-fiving as its two largest root-limbs, which had been tied together, twitched pathetically.

The rumble of thunder echoed through the air, taking over for the background music entirely as the blanket of dark clouds filling the sky finally broke into a light rain. The camera panned down past what looked to be the tallest pile of junk, some sort of metal bed frame sticking out of the top, to Noah and Harold. The two boys were now breathing heavily, but continuing to clash their weapons despite their exhaustion and to little avail.

"Why won't you just _fall_ already?" Noah said in growing frustration, the shot moving in for a close-up as the rain ran down his massive forehead. "How do you still have any _energy_? I mean come on, you were running around in heavy _armor_ for most of this!"

"I could say the same for you," Harold replied, the shot moving to his close-up as the rain pattered on his makeshift kabuto helmet. "Err, the energy part, not the armor part," he quickly clarified before hastily blocking a strike from the side that Noah launched during his brief moment of distraction. "The point is, after all the running around _you've_ been doing you should be tired too."

"What, are you going _blind_ now?" Noah asked irritably as the two clashed weapons again. "I _am_ tired, genius! I've done everything I can to wear you out, but nothing's _worked_ so far!" With a burst of frustration he grabbed his racket with both hands and shoved Harold back a few inches across what was quickly becoming muddy ground, only for the warrior to keep his balance and block the blow Noah had intended to sweep the legs out from under him. "Just like everything _else_ in my life, I've waited patiently and bided my time, scraping together every last little thing that could be to my advantage only to have it _fall out under me_ at the last moment. But you know what? I am NOT letting it go to waste this time!" He pushed forward again with enough viciousness to knock Harold back and break his guard and balance as the push ended, allowing Noah to follow up with a racket-push across his chest, sending the unarmored samurai falling back into the mud.

Noah quickly moved to pin his opponent, but with a wheeze Harold managed to throw him off with his wooden sword. Noah growled with frustration and pounded the mud, and both boys got back to their feet. "What, do you think this is _easy_ for me?" Harold asked in disbelief as the two stood face to face a few feet away from each other, panting heavily in the steadily increasing rain with their weapons not quite raised. "Do you even _know_ how much I have to live up to? How much I'm _fighting_ for? I have _four_ generations of Harold McGradys whose honor I must uphold. I have to avenge _Zoey_ , my dear friend who was eliminated by _your_ actions." The shot briefly cut to the girl in question, who blushed faintly and smiled at Jasmine as Harold continued off-screen with "And I have to make up for the mistake that allowed _you_ to be here instead of _Jasmine_." Although the survivalist drew herself up to her full height her stoic expression didn't change, and Zoey soon turned to watch the challenge again.

Another rumble of thunder filled the air as the shot cut back to Noah and Harold staring each other down. "It's time to show I have what it takes to win!" Harold declared.

Another pause, another rumble of thunder, and the screen split to show each boy tightening their grip on their weapon. The two cameras panned up to their rain-drenched faces, and at the same time they shouted "I'm not backing down!"

They charged forward with screams of frustration and ambition and desire, and the two halves of the split-screen slid away to reveal a distance shot of them running towards each other in front of the tallest junk pile.

Just as they reached one another and swung their racket and wooden sword, lightning struck the metal frame sticking out of the top of the pile and the scene was engulfed in light...

The light slowly faded to reveal the two finalists with their back to each other, weapons held out in front of them, on the opposite sides they'd started from – Harold now facing the left, Noah now facing the right. The only sound present was the pouring rain and their heavy breaths.

The shot cut from a close-up of Harold to a close-up of Noah, and then to a series of shots of the losers as they watched with baited breath. First Jasmine and Zoey, then Gwen and Trent, then Cameron and Courtney, then Justin and Lindsay, and lastly Cody and Leonard and Izzy.

With a strangled groan, Noah fell backward into the mud.

Harold's supporters perked up. "Harold, you can _win_!" Zoey called out first.

"Dude, pin him!" Trent added seconds later.

"This is your chance, mate, go for it!" Jasmine chimed in. The three kept sending their encouragement his way, with Leonard and Lindsay and even Justin joining in.

Harold looked at them, grinned weakly, and fell backward on top of Noah.

"ONE!" the former contestants all called out together, some more reluctantly than others.

"TWO!"

" _THREE_!"

"Boo-yah...," Harold finished with a look of pure satisfaction on his face, the rain finally letting up as a truly triumphant anthem rose gloriously up from the background.

"He's done it!" Chris announced excitedly, arriving on the scene in his Chef-pulled chariot. "Harold, has _done_ it! Harold wins Total Drama _Revenge_ of the Island, _and_ the million dollar prize!"

" _Yeah_! I _won_!" Harold cheered in sheer excitement, lifted up by his supporters and shown against a radiant golden background.

xxx

"Even though I never doubted myself for a second," Harold told the confessional camera with a smug grin and nod, "actually winning this whole competition has gotta be like the greatest feeling _ever_." He nodded at the camera before his excitement seemed to bubble over, leading him to throw his arms up in the air and shout "THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY _LIFE_!"

xxx

Noah seemed eerily devoid of emotion as he began his confessional. "Yup, I really should've known better than to expect anything else," he said. "I do everything I can think of to win and pull out all the stops, only to lose to the very dweeb I brought to the end with me. It's official, the universe hates me."

His eye twitched...and with a sudden scream of rage he punched the camera lens, forcing it to cut to static. The last thing it recorded was the sound of shattering of glass and a subsequent cry of pain.

xxx

The footage resumed on a shot of the season's twelve losers aboard a large speedboat with Chef at the wheel. A pan to the left along the Dock of Shame after the boat's engine started landed the focus on Chris and Harold, the host holding on to the prized briefcase. "Congratulations Harold, to the winner go the spoils," he said, the shot cutting in close to the case as its lid was flipped open. "One million dollars, in cold hard _cash_!" Chris announced, a radiant golden background appearing behind the money as a glorious tune played.

The case was closed and handed to the grinning Dweeb. "Sweet," he said, sagging slightly under his prize's weight when the host let go of it. Nevertheless, he managed to carry it all the way to the boat without further issue.

"Congratulations, man," Trent said. "You really earned it. And sorry for being such an _idiot_ when I was voted off."

"Thanks, and consider yourself totally forgiven," Harold told him.

"So, what are you gonna spend your prize money on?" Cody asked excitedly. "World's largest fooz-ball table? Every video game ever made?"

"A book of mighty spells?" Leonard suggested.

"How about a _makeover_?" Lindsay said eagerly.

"Ooh, or a _llama farm_!" Izzy added, rubbing her hands in anticipatory glee.

"Please," Courtney scoffed, " _obviously_ he should just invest it!"

"All excellent suggestions," Harold said with a knowing nod. "But before that, I have something else in mind. Jasmine," he told his former friend, who raised a brow in surprise, "I wanna offer you half the prize money. Not out of love or anything," he explained, "but to make up for the mistake I made that cost you your place in the finale."

Jasmine smiled, but shook her head. "Thanks but no thanks," she told him. "That money's all _yours_ , mate, you earned it fair and square."

Harold nodded in acceptance. "So can you at least forgive me for what I did?"

"I think I can get around to it, yeah," Jasmine smirked.

" _Yes_!" Harold said, pumping his fist in victory and stepping on to the boat between Zoey and Jasmine.

Zoey hugged him from the side, and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. "Congratulations, Harold," she told him. "I'm glad you were able to do so much. But what _are_ you gonna spend the money on, anyway?" she asked.

"I think I'll use it to put out an album," Harold said. "You guys might not know it, but I'm totally a wicked awesome beatboxer. Not to mention all the _other_ instruments I can play."

"Aww, dude, _sweet_!" Trent laughed, clapping his friend on the shoulder. "If you need someone to play guitar, just hit me up."

"Hey, I can play the keys if you want me to," Cody leaned over to offer.

"Sorry for giving you grief this season, man," Justin interrupted. "And if you want a really _hot_ guy to join your band, just call my agent. He's been really pushing me to diversify, and I think a music gig might get him off my back." He handed the victorious Dweeb a business card, which was accepted with a smile.

Harold looked around in wonder. "Gee, guys, I don't know what to say. I guess we got ourselves a band!"

" _Yeah_!" Trent and Cody and Justin chorused, the four boys group-fiving as a short rock riff played in the background.

Trent was soon pulled aside by Gwen, however, who planted a deep kiss on his lips. "Looks like you've hit the big time," she said happily as she broke the kiss.

"Looks like it," Trent said, looking into her eyes and wrapping his arms around her waist

As they began to kiss again, the camera panned to the front of the boat where Cameron and Noah stood closest to Chef – Cameron watching Gwen and Trent and the others with a smile; Noah rubbing his bandaged right hand with his back towards the rest of the group. "Wow, looks like things are looking up for pretty much everybody!"

"That include you, Bubble Boy?" Noah asked dryly, still focused on his self-inflicted injury.

"I guess so," Cameron answered after a moment's thought. "I mean, since I never sustained ans serious injuries on the show I doubt I'll have to go back to my bubble. What about you?" he asked, looking at his former teammate with a hint of concern. "Are _you_ gonna be okay?"

Noah said nothing for several seconds, and the camera cut outward as the boat finally started moving away from the dock. Only then did the runner-up answer "...meh, I'll deal."

"Well, that's it for another season," Chris said, the shot cutting to him as the music became solemn. He paused as the speedboat carrying the cast passed between him and the camera, then turned impishly towards them and said "Except for one last _surprise_ I hid on their boat." He broke into a devilish grin, and the shot cut to the boat speeding across the lake. "First rule of showbiz," his hand rose up in front of the camera holding his remote control, " _always_ go out with a bang." He pressed the button.

The perspective immediately inverted to show him getting caught up in an explosion that destroyed a good chunk of the dock. The former campers were shown cheering with glee, and the shot cut back just in time to catch Chris falling back down with a scream into the water. He quickly surfaced, spat out a mouthful of water, and sputtered around in confusion. "Huh?" he asked before the shot cut to Chef, the camera jumping in closer and closer to him in time with a high, sharp, and deadly tune, ending on his sly smirk. "CHEF!" the host yelled, shaking his fist in anger.

He quickly cleared his throat, though, and as he did the series' capstone theme began to play. "Until next time," he smiled at the camera, "I'm _Chris McLean_ , and this has been _Total_!" The scene cut to the Mutant Forest of Death and its bizarre mushrooms. " _Drama_!" The shot cut to the bog, the small island where Larry had once taken root now empty. "Rrre _venge_ , of the _Island_!" The shot cut to the abandoned mine, its raised entrance still blocked by fallen rocks.

The shot cut to Chris, still floating by the Dock of Shame as the sound of a helicopter suddenly rose up along side a tense and dramatic tune. "You're _busted_ , McLean!" an authoritarian voice said to the host's shock, prompting him to look up.

"For what?" he asked in outrage.

"Creating an environmental _disaster_ , that's what!" the voice answered, the camera cutting outward to show not only the helicopters that were hovering over the beach but also the two groups of hazmat-suited people standing on the busted dock. "Residents of Wawanakwa," the voice announced, "your island is now under government protection! You're hereby quarantined!" The shot cut back in closer, showing the skinnier figures on the left holding water buckets and the muscular figures on the right holding mops. "Prepare for heavy scrub _decontamination_!"

The pained cries of Chris McLean filled the air as the camera cut out even further, showing the usual long-distance shot of the island as the boat carrying the rest of the cast passed by, the former contestants still laughing and cheering.

/

/

/

[[DID YOU REALLY THINK THAT WAS IT? DID YOU REALLY THINK THAT WAS THE END?]]

[[SORRY, BUT WHAT _REALLY_ HAPPENED IS...]]

/

/

/

The light slowly faded to reveal the two finalists with their back to each other, weapons held out in front of them, on the opposite sides they'd started from – Harold now facing the left, Noah now facing the right. The only sound present was the pouring rain and their heavy breaths.

The shot cut from a close-up of Harold to a close-up of Noah, and then to a series of shots of the losers as they watched with baited breath. First Jasmine and Zoey, then Gwen and Trent, then Cameron and Courtney, then Justin and Lindsay, and lastly Cody and Leonard and Izzy.

With a dramatic cry, Harold fell backward into the mud.

Noah's supporters perked up. "Quick, Noah, pin him!" Gwen called out first.

" _Hurry up_!" Courtney commanded seconds later. "You can _win_ this!"

"This is what you've been fighting for!" Cameron chimed in. The three kept sending their encouragement his way, with Cody and even Izzy joining in.

Noah looked at them, uttered a single weak chuckle, and fell backward on top of Harold.

"ONE!" the former contestants all called out together, some more reluctantly than others.

"TWO!"

" _THREE_!"

" _Finally_...!" Noah finished with a slight sob, covering his eyes as water streamed from their corners. The rain finally began to let up, and a truly triumphant anthem rose gloriously up from the background.

"He's done it!" Chris announced excitedly, arriving on the scene in his Chef-pulled chariot. "Noah, has _done_ it! Noah wins Total Drama _Revenge_ of the Island, _and_ the million dollar prize!"

"I did it!" Noah repeated in sheer disbelieving excitement as he was lifted up by his supporters and shown against a radiant golden background.. "I really _won_!"

xxx

"I'm not _crying_ , okay? It's just the rain!" Noah protested in the confessional, wiping away the obvious tears from his eyes. He stared at the camera for a second, then laughed and wiped away even more. "Okay, but can you really blame me? For the first time in my life, I feel like I've come out on _top_!"

xxx

Harold was openly bawling as his confessional began. "Oh, the _shame_!" he cried, holding his muddy helmet in one hand before him. "How can I face my father now? How can I face my _friends_? I entered this competition to become a _man_ , but the only thing I've become is a _failure_..." He dramatically bowed his head, bringing the helmet he'd crafted close to his chest.

xxx

The footage resumed on a shot of the season's twelve losers aboard a large speedboat with Chef at the wheel. A pan to the left along the Dock of Shame after the boat's engine started landed the focus on Chris and Noah, the host holding on to the prized briefcase. "Congratulations Noah, to the winner go the spoils," he said, the shot cutting in close to the case as its lid was flipped open. "One million dollars, in cold hard _cash_!" Chris announced, a radiant golden background appearing behind the money as a glorious tune played.

The case was closed and handed to the grinning, starry-eyed Schemer. "Come to Papa you sweet, sweet million," he said, sagging slightly under his prize's weight when the host let go of it. Nevertheless, he managed to carry it all the way to the boat without further issue.

"Wow, Noah, congratulations," Gwen told him. "You really pulled through in the end. I'm happy for you."

"Thanks," Noah said. "And uh, sorry for all the questionable stuff I did these past few weeks," he added, rubbing the back of his head with a slight sheepishness. "I had to press every advantage I could get, y'know?"

"Hmmph," Courtney said, crossing her arms and smirking. "Well, I'll admit you _did_ play a good game."

"Yeah, unlike _other_ people I could mention," Gwen muttered under her breath, earning a surprised and hurt look from her former friend.

"So, what are you gonna spend your prize money on?" Cody asked excitedly. "World's largest fooz-ball table? Every video game ever made?"

"A book of mighty spells?" Leonard suggested.

"How about a _makeover_?" Lindsay said eagerly.

"Ooh, or a _llama farm_!" Izzy added, rubbing her hands in anticipatory glee.

"You guys are all _wrong_ ," Harold butted in. "He should totally take lessons in the ancient art of ninjitsu!"

"Uh...yeah...those are all _great_ suggestions," Noah replied with light sarcasm, "but I've got a list of thing that I _actually_ wanna spend money on, so I'll be going with those. Although," he said after a moment of thought, "every video game ever made _is_ on that list," he told Cody.

"Sweet," the first-boot said. "I guess great minds think alike!"

"Yeah, sure," Noah told him with a hint of condescension before stepping on the boat next to Gwen and Cameron. "So, Bubble Boy, you gonna go back inside your plastic shell now or what?"

"Actually, since I didn't sustain any serious injury this season," Cameron explained happily, "I don't think I need to return to it at all!"

"Wow, Cameron, that's great!" Gwen told him with a smile. "Looks like coming out here really did you some good."

"Yeah, kid," Noah added, "now you can see all the fresh horrors the outside world has in store for you." He and Gwen and Cameron laughed, although Cameron's quickly turned nervous.

The camera moved over to Harold, standing between Trent and Zoey and sighing sadly. "Dude, sorry you lost," Trent told him, putting a hand on the loser's shoulder. "And for being a jerk to you when I got eliminated too."

"It's fine," Harold said depressedly, "I understand. I made my share of mistakes too this season. I just wish I could've made up for them," he said, sending a forelorn look over at Jasmine, who was standing in the back of the group next to Justin. The survivalist noticed her former friend's gaze, but hung her head and looked away immediately.

Zoey looked from Harold to her and back again. "Well...I'm sure she'll forgive you if you just give her time," she told him. "I mean, she can't stay mad at you _forever_ , right?"

"I hope not," Harold said sadly.

The camera zoomed back to Jasmine and Justin as the male model looked from Harold's direction to the young woman beside him. "Wow, you're not even gonna console him after his loss?" he taunted. "That's _cold_."

"Save it," Jasmine shot back without looking at him.

"Hey, I'm just saying," Justin said, putting his hands up defensively. "Not that I blame you. The guy's a total loser, and to be honest I'm not sure why you were ever on his side to begin with. You should've known he was gonna let you down."

"I said, _save it_!" Jasmine growled, grabbing him by the collar and pulling him close to her with one hand.

"Right, right, forget I said anything," Justin said nervously as the camera cut outward to show the boat finally starting to move away from the dock.

"Well, that's it for another season," Chris said, the shot cutting to him as the music became solemn. He paused as the speedboat carrying the cast passed between him and the camera, then turned impishly towards them and said "Except for one last _surprise_ I hid on their boat." He broke into a devilish grin, and the shot cut to the boat speeding across the lake. "First rule of showbiz," his hand rose up in front of the camera holding his remote control, " _always_ go out with a bang." He pressed the button.

The perspective immediately inverted to show him getting caught up in an explosion that destroyed a good chunk of the dock. The former campers were shown cheering with glee, and the shot cut back just in time to catch Chris falling back down with a scream into the water. He quickly surfaced, spat out a mouthful of water, and sputtered around in confusion. "Huh?" he asked before the shot cut to Chef, the camera jumping in closer and closer to him in time with a high, sharp, and deadly tune, ending on his sly smirk. "CHEF!" the host yelled, shaking his fist in anger.

He quickly cleared his throat, though, and as he did the series' capstone theme began to play. "Until next time," he smiled at the camera, "I'm _Chris McLean_ , and this has been _Total_!" The scene cut to the Mutant Forest of Death, and its bizarre mushrooms. " _Drama_!" The shot cut to the bog, the small island where Larry had once taken root now empty. "Rrre _venge_ , of the _Island_!" The shot cut to the abandoned mine, its raised entrance still blocked by fallen rocks.

The shot cut to Chris, still floating by the Dock of Shame as the sound of a helicopter suddenly rose up along side a tense and dramatic tune. "You're busted, McLean!" an authoritarian voice said to the host's shock, prompting him to look up.

"For what?" he asked in outrage.

"Creating an environmental _disaster_ , that's what!" the voice answered, the camera cutting outward to show not only the helicopters that were hovering over the beach but also the two groups of hazmat-suited people standing on the busted dock. "Residents of Wawanakwa," the voice announced, "your island is now under government protection! You're hereby quarantined!" The shot cut back in closer, showing the skinnier figures on the left holding water buckets and the muscular figures on the right holding mops. "Prepare for heavy scrub _decontamination_!"

The pained cries of Chris McLean filled the air as the camera cut out even further, showing the usual long-distance shot of the island as the boat carrying the rest of the cast passed by, the former contestants still laughing and cheering.

(Fade to Credits)

* * *

 **Author's Note - Post Script**

And thus, it ends. Both young nerd fought hard, but ultimately it was Noah who emerged the official victor of Total Shuffled Revenge of the Island.

This decision was not made without considerable thought, and for a long time I had intended Harold to be the ultimate victor - I do prefer the good guys to win, after all. But, of course, I ended up being swayed. In part, I will admit, it was because so many of you expressed a desire for Noah to win - normally I try not to be swayed like that, but after a lot of thought I saw the merits of it. I mean, I had intended all season that Noah, though nominally an antagonist, would be much less villainous than any of the others in his role. So why not highlight the difference by allowing him to finally claim victory? I was going to make him sympathetic either way, and he really isn't an especially bad person like Alejandro, or Scarlett, or Sugar. Noah was, I think, a villain because he needed to be, not because he wanted to be.

Of course, his ending is still in many ways 'worse' than the alternate one, particularly for Harold. Our annoying-yet-lovable dweeb missed out on the money, the band, and even Jasmine's forgiveness...but on the other hand, Harold's ending was worse for Noah, though perhaps not to the same degree.

The two messages from home still make me smile to think about. Showing off Harold McGrady IV quickly became the obvious choice for Harold's video chat, and I think it gives an interesting look into why our Harold is the way he is. Or at least why he thinks so highly of himself, and what motivates him. And for Noah, well, I obviously had to include his dog. And then his mother, to mirror Harold's dad. Noah, though certainly a private person with a prickly personality, does have a soft side and I wanted to show that here. Again, a lot of who he is was born of necessity.

I hope you all enjoyed the motifs I gave them this episode. The possibility of mimicking 'Iron Cam' with one of them was never really on the table in my mind; that was such a classic Cameron thing that it would feel wrong to give it to Noah or Harold. Especially because 'Iron Cam' was meant to highlight Cameron's brains versus Lightning's brawn, a dynamic which was completely absent in the Shuffled finale. So instead, I went with sort of a rogue versus warrior theme, which better mirrors their playstyles and personalities - underhanded and tricky Noah who wants to wear his opponent down before bringing out something big but risky, versus more straightforward and dramatic Harold who goes with the direct approach of hitting Noah with a sharpened stick. And as for the added junk piles...well, I figured Chris would want to make things a bit more interesting for a nerd-v-nerd fight, plus it allowed be to better facilitate Noah's strategy.

And then we have the mutants. Originally I hadn't given it much thought beyond having them basically repeat their canon performance (relatively speaking, as their was no good reason to have Staci take Zeke's role again). But at some point, I'm not sure exactly when, I realized...Jasmine's not gonna take it, especially after the way she got eliminated. And Izzy wouldn't take it either. And...it just kind of spiraled out from there until the entire cast was routing the entire attacking force of mutants. And I really liked it! Not just because of how awesome it was to imagine and write, but also because at the start of the season the mutants were made out to be this huge, terrifying group of relatively unknown threats. But just about every last one has been overcome by the cast, so it only felt right that the finale would showcase the mutant's complete defeat. And in hindsight, their reduced role in All-Stars makes it even more natural.

But...yeah, that's the end of Total Shuffled Revenge of the Island! The first thirteen-episode season was kind of a different experience that the original trilogy, mostly due to the pacing but the cast itself also made things interesting. Though I know that it has its flaws, like the previous entries of the Shuffled series, I sincerely enjoyed writing it and I'm glad so many of you have enjoyed reading it.

It feels strange to say this, but for six of these players their story is over - they won't be competing again any time in the foreseeable future. But the other seven of them will be moving on to **Total Shuffled All-Stars, which will debut Friday, May 13th, 2016** , aka next week. Look forward to it.

And until then, let me know what you thought of the finale, and of the season as a whole! I truly love to hear both your feedback and your thoughts. So until next week, enjoy yourselves and have fun!

\- Fangren

* * *

 **Appendix: TSROTI Eliminated Contestants**

Cody - (13th Place)

Izzy - (RETURNED | Formerly AWOL)

Leonard - (12th Place)

Justin - (11th Place)

Lindsay - (10th Place)

Cameron - (9th Place)

Izzy - (Tied for 7th Place | Mutated, but captured)

Gwen - (Tied for 7th Place)

Zoey - (6th Place)

Trent - (5th Place)

Courtney - (4th Place)

Jasmine - (3rd Place)

Harold - (RUNNER-UP | Alternate Winner)

Noah - (WINNER | Alternate Runner-Up)


End file.
